How To Turn Your Anger Into Achievement - podcast episode cover

How To Turn Your Anger Into Achievement

Dec 16, 202411 minSeason 1Ep. 454
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Episode description

Welcome to this week’s episode of the Mastin Kipp Podcast!

In this episode, you’ll learn about:

  • A game-changing perspective on safety that could transform your growth.
  • Why perfectionism might be holding you back from your next level.
  • A surprising way to use challenging emotions to fuel your success.
  • And much more!

Click here to get free samples of all six Lypo-Spheric LivOn supplements (a $30 value) with your first purchase at LivOnLabs.com/mastin.

Click here to get my brand new book Reclaim Your Nervous System: A Guide to Positive Change, Mental Wellness, and Post-Traumatic Growth.

Transcript

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Fine. And you? Not too bad. How can we help you this morning? Okay. I have one question, Mastin. Just one? Are you sure? I I have 2. Oh, okay. But I want to know how do I show my nervous system that it's safe to do things that before were not safe? Great question. So let's add one word to your question. Uh-huh. What would happen if you added the word enough after safe? Safe enough? Yeah. I don't know. How do I show my nervous system to be safe enough Yeah. To do the things that

before were not safe? That's right. Mhmm. How does that one word change the question for you? Yeah. It feels easier. Yeah. Yeah. Because I think, like, one of the I'm one of the things I'm always fascinated about is I love communication. Like, I I try so hard to be clear in communication and always try to learn the new stuff to bring the new stuff to you so

that you have the new stuff to, you know, get better results. And what's really funny is, you know, you do this long enough, 15, 20 years, and it's really interesting how you introduce a new concept and then protectors, protective parts of of people's psyche, get a hold of them, and then twist it. Right? So this idea of safety was, you know, new and, profound for a lot of people about maybe, I don't know, 20, 24 or so, maybe like 10 ish years ago. You

know, we, you know, saved us. Oh, yeah. I need safety. But then perfectionism parts grab a hold of that word. Right? And it's like, I need, like, perfect. I only use this safety. I need, like, perfect safety, total safety. Right? And, like, yeah, you can see it with your smile right there. You're just like, yeah. Right? So, like, like, there is no such thing as perfect safety. We live in a universe that's inherently chaotic. Right? And it's like, there's

so much stuff that we don't see coming. Life changes all the time. So the amount of safety that you wanna have is 50.00001. Does that make sense? Not a hundred. Right. But the perfectionistic parts, like I need perfect safety. I don't have perfect safety. I can't move forward. But if I have perfect safety, I'm never gonna risk. And everything we want, it requires risk. And I can even see by this answer when you're smiling that there's a part of

you that's like, oh, thank God. Mhmm. Right? Because it's enough safety, not perfect safety. Like, I'll give you an example. Like in a relationship, right, Nobody enters a relationship ready for it. Nobody. Because you don't know what you're getting yourself into until later. Does that make sense? Nobody starts a business ready for it with perfect safety. That's not

how life works. Right? That part of part of life is learning how to build emotional fitness and, the fit nervous system, which says, I'm safe enough. Right? Like, I'm not in a life threatening situation. I have risk. I have things that are hard to do. I have fear, but, like, I'm not in an imminent life threat, and it's certainly not my history. It's not when I was 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 10, 15 years old. I'm safe enough. Does that make sense? Yes. It does.

Yeah. The the way that this used to be phrased before the word safety was there, we would talk a lot about just like, you know, manifesting or or or purpose. Right? And you could hear the perfection in this word fully. Mhmm. Right? How do I fully embody, fully feel, fully express my purpose? And it's like, I don't know. What if you just, like, 1% did it?

See, that's better than 0% now. Right? So we wanna, like, take this, like, idea of big, perfect safety or fully being finished before you start something new or whatever, and kind of make it a lot smaller. And just say, if am I safe enough right now? And if I'm asking that question, the answer is probably yes. Just kind of like you ever look for a sign? Some people do. Right? Yes. If you're looking for a sign, the sign is that you're looking. That's the confirmation. Right? Because

some part of you is looking for confirmation. That's enough. Right? So it's a really comes back to self trust and having enough safety because let's think about it. What's next for you? What do you wanna manifest or create? What abundance do you wanna create in your life? I want to grow my business. Yeah. So in business, is there a perfect safety? No. Here's the answer. Yeah. That's the answer. Just give me the answer real quick.

Okay? And here's the thing about business. Okay? Business is like being a gladiator. Right? When you're in business, like what, what do I mean by that? When you're in business, you're more likely to die the longer you play. That's just what statistics show you. Right? Most businesses don't make it past 10 years. Right. And like we've been in it for 15 years. I feel pretty happy about that. And so it's like, it's like you're in a, you're in a, you're

choosing into something that's inherently highly risk inducing. Like there's a lot of risk associated with it. And if you're looking for perfect safety, it's not gonna happen. Now the way that you help your nervous system know that it's safe enough is with what are called corrective emotional experiences or disconfirming experiences. And basically, a disconfirming or corrective experience is almost exactly the same as the shit that happened to you, but the outcome is different. Mhmm. Right?

Because the emotions we we rehearse these emotions of protection and safety all the time. Right? So we're gonna feel those things. So if you're feeling those things again, that's not a bad thing. It's not a sign you should stop. It means that you're setting yourself up for a corrective emotional experience. Mhmm. Which the only real difference is how it ends. Mhmm. Right? The rest is like a roller coaster ride, but this time, you live. Yeah. This this time, it's going to end different because,

you know, I am in a different position. Exactly. That's exactly right. A 100% yes. Yep. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Beautiful. And the second question is, I feel a lot of anger, because of things that happened in the past, whatever. And that anger brings me to the red part of the letter. How do I use Anger isn't red. No. I know it's not it's not it's yellow. I'm very jealous. But because that energy brings me to numb. So I want to use that energy in a positive way to bring me I see. Move

me in a positive way. I see. Okay. Okay. That makes sense. So so if you think about anger for a second. Right? Like, one of the things anger if you think what's the purpose of anger? It's an emotion of agency. It's an emotion of power. It's very similar biochemically to, like, amphetamines. Right? Like, I'm serious. Like, it has, like, a not a lot of, like, norepinephrine in it, which is, like, you know, Adderall and all that type of stuff. Act

on those the same way. You know, when you do, like someone's about to die and, of, like, a drug overdose and you shoot them in the heart with adrenaline, you know, similar biochemistry to anger in a way. Right? So anger has a, has a power to it. Right? So if you think about it, like anger is really an emotion of, of, of, of justice in a way, some there's an injustice, something's happened. That's not fair. Right? And so, like, the question becomes,

okay. If I know that, well, what action is this anger driving me towards to be able to make something fair? Like, I had a business partner once who at the time I felt like really betrayed me and, like, took away all my trust. And for like a year and a half, I was so mad at this person. And like my, I was mad. Like I was not like spiritual or happy or regulated or wishing them peace. I was like super pissed. Right. And like, I use that anger and like, I used it and I literally said to

myself, I'm gonna become so successful. I'm gonna get on Oprah, you know, like just to be so mad. It actually happened. Right. So it's like, how'd you go to Oprah? I got pissed. I love that. But like celebrate what motivates you. Use it, use it. So, but the question is like, I was angry because I felt like my chance at success was taken away. Right. So I gave myself the chance. Right? And I had the couch shirt for a couple years. I had to go through a lot of financial hardship. I had

to figure stuff out. Now if you work with us, you won't have the couch shirt for 2 years because we figured this shit out. But the point is, is that the anger was pointing me towards what I wanted. Mhmm. Versus staying stuck on focusing on what had happened to me. I was like, I'm gonna show you. And that's where I was at that point in my life. And so celebrate what motivates you. So what's what's missing or what do you wanna create? That I want to be successful in

my business. Yeah. Successful enough to prove them wrong. Perfect. So celebrate what motivates you, and that's the answer right there. Mhmm. Right? And prove them wrong until you don't need to anymore. Yes. I know that. Beautiful. Let's hear it, y'all. So Thank you. I love that. So good.

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