And we're back laps fan rushing. The podcast The Colisseum Collection brings us to WWF's explosive TNT Show Edition twenty five in the home video series and Boss, give me that crackle and wavy noise and the sound of silence. Silence had a sound in the eighties. I don't know what it was it did. It's well, it's called tape hiss. It wasn't the absence of sound. I can tell you that, No, it was. Definitely it was a crackle of tape, is what it was. And federal lot at the time provided
severe civil and criminal penalties as well. None that had a little buzz that's good did really well there. If I have to watch one more documentary, by the way, that starts with like someone inserting his tape and with machine stop. Look, I get it, I get it, all right, we've all we've been saying it for for We've been saying it for eleven years now, So shut the fuck up.
Blue screen. Colisseum Video presents no columns. Yet still all the look out for it, No we got I think pretty sure we have another two years before that I won't feel to note its absence. However, still and this is still Lady six right, Yeah, Yeah, it's pretty actually crazy how much time we've covered in the Coliseum collection. Like you think about how primitive those early tapes were, but at the same time, it's crazy how little time
we've actually covered. You know, it's twenty five tapes and it's been a little over a year amount of a little more year's time in terms of of tapes, Like there's still that many more to go, for sure. Yeah, if you look at how many more to go, there's still a huge twenty five tapes in a year and change. They are fucking making as much money as they can. Logo for the WWA home video. We get the constellation. It began over five thousand years ago, but you already know that.
I guess, well, well, you know before for over five million years before, there was a civilization and entertained the masses with predetermined physical altercations and an attempt to create emotional reactions.
I'm surprised they went to the trouble of reinserting a new verbiage all these years later. They studied, practiced, and perfected this falsehood. They wore stretchable attire to showcase musculature. They used secret code words to inform their dance partner of what they should do next. They did it to create did to create emotion, did to create the illusion of competitive drive? Drive was the word that that sent me. It is playfighting, ah bro, it is sports entertainment. That's better.
It is play fighting. We go back to the studio or means gioquolan. Is it a against a tan background with the two The lighting, the lighting is very different. They've they've they've got a new DP working here because it's definitely not as kind of flat like there's you know, there's there's dimension in Gene which you don't usually see. But I've got them here welcoming us to video Controls.
Yes, yes, hello again everyone. This is Gene okerlhan On behalf of the World Wrestling Federation and Colisseum Video bringing you another program, the official World Wrestling Federation Home video series. This cassette is about some of the more interesting aspects
of professional wrestling. We've received so much mail the subject has to have a videotape all of its owns, So right here, we're going to bring you the very best of a television show which has become the most popular program on cable TV and it is Tuesday Night Titans, or it's more popularly on as TNT.
Now.
It's very much like a talk show in that there is a host of the co host and guests that
make appearances or intervals, with one important difference. All the guests on TNT are wrestlers, the superstars of the World Wrestling Federation, who not only bring footage of their action inside the squared circle, but also reveal that they indeed are people too, with their own talents and stories to tell, usually about wrestling, but sometimes about quite different matters, like the acting careers of mister Fuji and the magnificent Morocco
Captain lu Albatawan cooking. There's lots to see here, so let's get to it right now.
And Yeah, I don't know whether it feel underwhelmed or overwhelmed. I know it's it's a very like it's it's there, they're It's what I find to be amazing is that, like you said, it definitely feels like they're running out of shit. Yeah, do yet at the same time they I go for another four years with this same exact formula, the trifecta. The trifecta. It continues until through nineteen ninety.
That's insane, I believe, and it's it's very bizarre that it's like the yeah, I don't know, I don't know.
I mean, the fact that they have twenty twenty.
Volumes of Best of the WWE is really remarkable to me. Like the fact that series went on for twenty volumes is unbelievable.
It's a great call to me, absolutely believable. But first up, we've got this. And again, like I said, there are some of them that just need to be played in their entirety, and this is one of them. I want you to know by the way that Genie Oakerland was delivering that monolog had his eyeglasses in his hand, so that that makes you feel welcomed and comforted of course.
Yeah, he's well, hey, hey, I see you there. I'm going to stop reading the newspaper. Welcome you all. Hello again, Jane Oakland. Nothing's gonna be video control.
Oh hello, you know, yeah, yeah, nothing like people who use their eyeglasses as you know what I mean, a device I know. Oh, hi, like as if you're right there, take the glasses off and look out the window, and that means you have money.
Yep, Yes, exactly exactly. Yeah, here, here we go. I don't know if you're ready for this or not, but here we go.
You are not, I repeat, not going to see tom Yeah.
I also, by the way, I did the Gene Okerland interview intros for every sad segment, this one.
That's causing collection listeners have come to expect.
Yeah, Ah Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas.
Philichael Thomas, you will not.
See honest cops risking their lives in heroic fashion. What you bought the witness is the more ReSpectacle. And I use that term advisedly. I'll mister his prize protege to Morocco who continue to insist in if they don't become major film stars, they can get his famous as actors on prime time television.
Get ready here Cob supports fights.
But that that's that theme song too, and sounds nothing like the Miami Vice theme theme song. No, it sounds like it sounds like a typical WWF television themes.
So yeah, yeah, it's good. Of it's great, Like I love the bass theme song as f.
It's one of the most legendary. Yeah, that's so great. In the air tonight, some of the greatest TV you'll ever see. Yea exact dun dung dun dung and dung dun dum dum. Got it. Boom boom.
This dude must have been keeping some pretty fast company.
Looking at the body of the beach. Love to know who these actors and actresses are. If anybody knows.
It, it's definitely drug related. Let's been a shipment's coming down pretty soon, probably cooked, probably a big one.
We look at Daisy's place. Yeah yeah, easy, lady, what a humanitarian my brother.
I haven't seen him for years.
I can't believe he could.
One.
Yeah right, worry miss drugs, he got involved in drugs.
There come two of our vice cops.
Now oujin Morocco, dude, your dad?
For sure.
A man here was wasted because of a big coke deal coming down the street. Hawk must be moving his stuff on the streets pretty soon. My friend here must have gotten in the way somehow.
One my poor wand.
All of this.
She claims she's this guy's sister. Angelica says she hasn't seen him for years. I don't see the family.
Resemblance's right there, right, wasted this.
Guy pretty good, but even in mint condition, that wouldn't fit you to for a match.
Sent I know we'll get him or her. This doesn't look like women's work to me. This guy was taken out by.
I don't rule down anybody. Maybe we haven't caught the Seahawk pro while because we've been on the wrong scent.
Angelica angelus at him his way out of lot. It sounds like a big pussy at the guy.
Who offered your brother. Don't worry about a thing. You're in good hands.
Now, come on, we'll get you.
You try to drink for a poor working girl, and you got yourself a.
Deal awful soap for working. So you see Angelica inside the nightclubs. It's right.
I don't know why your lieutenant is acting the way that he is, but I don't trust him. One must have gotten mixed up with the wrong crowd, but I think he was trying to go straight. I'm sure that he was on his way to the police when the Seahawk caught him.
The Sea Hawks buying out more than he could chew.
The Seahawks gonna be bringing his cocade to town. He's gonna want some buyers taking up his hands.
Well, you're looking at him, and we got a quarter million of the squad's money to play with.
Let's think the high You don't think that behind the steat.
It's possible thread driving some new wheels. He's cool alright without keep an eye on him. We'll hit the pavement, set up a meeting with the Seahawks and tell him more interested in buying what he's selling, Dan, we kneeled him. We'll go back to my place after you.
Get the lieutenant.
Yeah, let's go there it is. Let me hear it.
Let's try our first and format mad at the mouth.
The mouth this is where Daisy's wheelhouse factors at a quarter Yeah. Now there the phone.
Boost pay you back next week?
Yeah? Okay, Morocco with the collar pop by the way, am sure?
Oh?
I get this music problem? Man, I'm just and showing them interviewing people on the street to the destination they again can again.
Game all right, right in the game.
What they find I don't even remember this is they.
Got this quarter of my answer buy a lot of happiness.
Too bad, he'd below to Doggy Potman be surprised.
Because the loss of the scuffle during the arrest, it could very easily find his way into our pocket.
If they find the briefcase for cash.
We're here to see the Seahawks.
Oh no, they made a breakthrough, right did they talked to someone that gave them information? Right now they're on the boat. This is the angler. Yes, you two little boys lost loss bedtime store.
Look like we have a quarter million to invest in the import business.
But if you're not interested, we're in the wrong place.
He dreadful monotone.
We have a special today on a little nose candy.
A quarter of a million can get you a snoopful.
We're going to deal with a.
Who is this dude?
Don't worry about him. He's okay, he's from out of town.
I want to get him a little some of that chases blues away.
Let me see your business card. The see can't be too careful.
Seahawk is supposed to be the big drug dealer here that's responsible for the.
Impressive credentials. I'm sure the Seahawks will be glad to see you.
Wait here, we're.
About to become rich Eryld's partner. I can't ah you're talking ah nice work boys there.
She is the supposed to sister of one you will is Seahawks. She's the drug.
She is.
Where the sea hawk? You're looking at it?
If they sound so share, I know right, I don't believe.
This plan worked perfectly.
The two cops personally deliver a quarter of a million dollars.
She takes the briefcase.
Ye, what are you going to do to us?
The same thing that happened to WM?
You killed your own brother?
Why one and I were no more related than your partner here they weren't related.
Then he got smart wanted to go to Christian Yeah right.
The Seahawks doesn't like competition.
I should have never hired a man you can't trust him.
Tie him up.
So they've been tied to the mast on the boat.
Nobody will try to stop us with two detectives tied to the front.
Of the boat.
Great plan filled on a show.
Exactly right, we're gonna talk about ring boys been taking advantage of right, gonna be right?
Yeah, higher up and show the coast Guard boat. Yea racing across the water to make the save. Those are the sirens. Looks like a.
Department lease, braise your hands and drop your weapon.
Man with this music was like.
Once again, federal sorties are successful in their attempt to stop the local track.
Can you make it?
What's going on? One of the largest rings?
Just a moment?
Can you what's this bike? Can you make a comment. We're the ones and here are you gentlemen? Here are you Spice detectives, Morocco and food.
We know what we're the ones who know about the drug?
Right And are you expecting to reward reward? Of course we don't too, honest cops like us. We don't want any reward. We're doing for our country. And you knew all along that the seahawk was behind us. That's right, very good thinking. They to they we had them.
So did they know she was seahawk all along? Was that the idea?
Well?
They only they knew. I think they just they found out when it happened. Can I ask you a question?
Uh?
Huh thoughts? Oh god, h.
Uh.
I don't even know where to begin. It's it's one of the most bizarre things. It's just like it's it's it's awful. Honestly, it's it's just awful.
They're so bad that it's not necessarily saved by the fact that it knows it's bad, right, right, you know? It doesn't? Uh?
I feel like if if if Fuji and Morocco were actually trying to act, it might have been better.
It might it might not not better. It might have been bad enough that it would have been fun to watch. But because they're just kind of sitting there like like like bricks it it's awful. Well it's one take Jones, you know, that's the business at the time. They're not about to They got two hours to shoot this, you know, just like I know, but it's like, you know what you're saying, like that's that's what it is. It's just awful. It's soul. It's can't be to the point where it's like,
why do you even bother doing this? Because what is it supposed to get across about Don Morocco? Like I guess the gimmick was that they thought they could make it in places other than wrestling, and he's always talking about his ability to make money and cross entertainment to kind of try to match Haul Cogan in that regard. But it's just it, this is just a strange detour.
If that's what you're trying to get across. This is like an involved thing to do, but you know it's I think it's part and parcel of that lifelong struggle that Vince and anyone who worked under him had, and you know, Kevin Dunn made it his whole personality of you know, just trying to be taken seriously by doing something more than pro wrestling with wrestlers. And it's just
the wrestling album. You know, you can couch it in camp and you can act like it's all knowing and tony in cheek, but the fact of the matter is you're doing that because you have to, because otherwise, no one would ever allow you to try to make a soap operat, no one would ever allow you to try to make a music video.
You have to do that.
It's the only chance you got. And to Vince's credit, he saw that and read it well, and you know, he read the pitch and took the swing. But my god, that we left with some strange video artifacts. It's it's really true. It's really true. Let me show you what wrestling was like when I was a kid. Yeah, son, take a look. It's like, this is hardly a hardly self explanatory in terms of why this was good or even like worth doing. But yeah, that's that's Fuji vice.
And again there were other ones Fuji General, Fuji Chan, Fuji Bandido, which will will you know, we'll get there, We'll get there. Yeah, they didn't do it right away. They kind of went yeah, they went, they went back. It's it's very bizarre how they the order that they did this, Like why aren't you just doing the fucking Fuji Morocco ship right from the get go? And like why are you saving it for later? I don't know, right,
It's weird. It's it's weird to put this on CNT tap because it's like TNT is the set, you know, I know this aired on TNT, right, but it's like there should almost be a Fuji Morocco video, you know, I think, yeah, right, didn't they make one? They even did? I could be wrong about that.
They might have, but I feel like the Don Morocco one, you know, you know how they were back in the day, Remember how they would they'd kind of do one as you were on your way out. I feel like they did a Don Morocco one, like a nineteen eighty eight or something. Oh really, it could be wrong.
Yeah, I don't see it coming up here in a quick search, But that doesn't necessarily mean they didn't do anything. But yeah, Fuji Vice a landmark in its own right, and Gene wants to take us back to the subject of nicknames. Boss Oh, yes, here we go. Here is Gene introducing the next segment.
Getting back to the subject of nicknames. Bobby Heathen has another handle that he didn't place upon himself. Those who don't favor calling this rule breaker the brain have branded him with weasel and headn hates it so much he was willing to come on TNT had quite a proof of the public that he was absolutely not a weasel with surprising reseil.
So again that lures you in thinking you're going to see this match, which is right. Bobby Heenon Big John Studden, King Kong Bundy versus Andre the Giant Hillbilly Jim and Louel Bano. But all you really get is a headbot. You get Bobby Heenen in there black singlet before Andre wore it, and you get Andre lunging and stud coming in and punching him, and Andre barely mobile, yanking Heenan into the ring and they go right to Vincent Studio. On Tuesday Night, Titans title card reads the Brain meets
the Weasel, Yes, and that is what it is. And here here's a picking up a string at the time of Heenan not only being called a weasel, but physically resembling a weasel. And to get that over, they brought a kid onto set with the Hoopmania T shirt and he's got his pet weasel in his hand. Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, weasel Jamie. I love to know where they sourced these these kids at the time. Probably Mel Phillips helped. Yeah,
they play, they even play. Pop goes the weasel as the kid comes out with the weasel in his arm. And I mean, it's just awful. It's just it's just stupid. So you believe you're right a weasel, mister he and.
I understand you. You've you know what I mean, You do weasel yourself out of situations. And I do believe that you may have a weasel, uh in your pocket?
Is that true?
Now?
You keep weasels in your pocket? Here's a weasel in that he hid behind people his whole life. You know, that was kind of the idea as he talks about in his book. He says, the brain, this is one of the great parts of his book. The brain will cheat and lie he'll be everyone's friend, but he'll backstab them, always smiling to their face. Yes, yes, if you make him mad, he'll tell you what he thinks, knowing he has a way out. The Bill Clinton of wrestling. He's
truly a weasel. He's kind of a combination of a dangerous used car salesman and a movie agent who does nothing but porn films. Yes, that's brilliant. The weasel chance started right away, and people ask me if I ever was hurt or upset, he says, when people called my dad weasel, I guess they used to call his dad that as well. Oh no, pardon me. This is actually an excerpt in the book from his daughter, Jessica Heenan. People often ask me if I was ever hurt or
upset when people called my dad weasel. Hell no, I probably started the chance. It was a tough life growing up with a father like mine, someone who is a world renowned TV star, not in one everyone hated. In elementary school, the boys used to be so mean to me. In my mind, I had to protect the business, as my father taught me. They used to make fun of me, not because they were really that mean, but because they were jealous and wanted them in the action, so to speak.
The only thing that morons didn't know is that if they had been nice to me, they could have been part of the cool thing known as wrestling. So this is okay, I don't know about cool thing. Yeah, I'd be very careful about that. They're and they're never going to feel like what your dad does is cool at all. So we have Vince there with a cute little weasel. He calls it. It's not a cute little weasel, bell take a look.
But so anyway, I got here, I got some part of this here with Vince asks the kid if there's any comparisons to Bobby Heenan and the weasel.
Jamie, let me ask you, do you personally see any resemblance facially or in any characteristic facially in terms of your your weasel, your pet and mister Heenon?
Oh you do?
Oh?
What grade are you in?
You want to see the eighth grade?
Doubt?
Let's be nice.
This young man has come up on the show, embarrassed me as a guest, and brought that cute little weasel.
How long is a.
Tail on that weasel? I have measured it, see, but he has a tail. Right, take a look, kid, You see a tail on me?
Is there a tail?
There is there any fur in my body?
No?
But it's it looks like me.
I don't know. It's I think it may be that there is a resemblance.
There isn't a resemblance. I'm not a weasel.
My hair is My hair is wavy.
That's a straight haired weasel.
Similar I do have curly hair.
Weasels.
I don't know. His characteristic is a concerned hair As far as character, I took a picture to show the people the difference there.
The thing attacked me.
It was at punts on my ear robe.
All right, I think we have definitely determined.
I am not a more time, just one quick if we can get a close up of the weazels face, one more time, close up with mister Hannen's face, please mm.
Hmmm, we rest our case and we'll be back with more.
TT say, I'm not decided.
No, I'm not.
I didn't say you ever.
Bring that we out here.
He's doing his best, he's still he's showing the spark you know that would have lead to the Bobby Heenon show and all that. Yes, that's where USA green let it because they saw how well he did in these segments. He's, I mean, he's he's he is fucking money, there's no question about that. And they show like a split screen of his face in the Weasel's face, and it is pretty funny, like the way he has that like non plus look on his face. What what what I know?
Know what's happening? Like you don't even know what's happening? Like what what youreen?
I love? I love Heenen's what do you what do you mean? Face? I love that. It's like the greatest thing in the world. It really is.
I mean, it's it's such a it's a spectacular, spectacular visual. His just his just on he's he's just doesn't know what's going on, Like he doesn't know where he.
Is what he's just he's just he's he's concerned that people are talking in a way that he's not attacking, you know, exactly like set up the the you know, he he always thinks that he's three steps ahead of people, but he's also always scared that he's like five steps behind people. Perfect. Yeah, so he's like that, you know, he's the ultimate mark, you know, but he thinks he's a con man, Yes, exactly exactly. How brown is that carpet? How brown is that? How brown is everything during TNT.
I mean it's it's like it's it's so dark yet it's also so it's just not it doesn't make me feel cozy at all. No, it does not.
It makes me feel like I'm like I'm like I'm in a building that's going to collapse. Like it was like such a there's such a phony version of it of a talk show set.
Like I'm in the doctor's office and like the seventh R right, like the alcoholic swabs y you know, yes, exactly. I just hate it. Oh, I hate the look of the set. Man, he just the browns. Just I know, there was nothing, you know, incongress about it at the time, but ugh, something you got Vince back there thinking he is just hilarious and he's just overdoing every single thing. Yeah, yep, but he does best. But that was that was That was a funny visual with the close up of the weasel.
I have to say, well, the Funk family knows how to feel at home in the ring, you know, indeed they do.
The Funk family, he knows how to feel at home of the ring by bringing the rough and tumble style of Texas wrestling to the World Wrestling Federation. But the Funks also are very fond of another great Texas institution, the barbecue. However, as Lord Albert Hayes is about the fine, whether wrestling or eating, there's nothing totally normal about the Funks.
They're just having the time of their lives with these guys. You know, they're just fucking fucking with them so hard. It's so true. They don't know what, you know. Proud text as men third second generation ran a territory for years, both world champs of the nw A, and they're just being reduced to barbecue enthusiasts, right, They're just jokes. And they share clips of Dory Funk Costs Funk versus George Wells during the course of all this and MSG.
Wow, yeah, yeah, I cut off the thing because it just it didn't really It's this bizarre thing, like, uh, you know, you get the middle of the match that where he just stops talking for a little while.
Yeah, and he's just he's doing is working the leg, He's just working the ankle. It's not right. But but but like but like Gene like said doesn't even set up the match or anything like that, just kind of is there. It's just there, and it's yeah, it's so weird. Well, one thing we do learn is what Grilla Monsoon conveys about George Wells, which I never knew before. George Wells Monsoon says that he always starts out as a house of fire and then loses it. He's the opposite of
Greg Valentine. Oh my god. Could be the conditioning is they try to make, you know, subtle remarks about his belly. Al Hay is laughing at the man on the broadcast and Funk hits the European uppercut but gets a suplex blocked. And yes, before we go to the feature segment, the personality profile on the Funks, they showed the last thing you see is Dory Funk getting supplex out of his
boots by George Wells. Like, what the fuck is this already putting the spotlight on the Funks or are you trying to make me want to see more about George Wells? What kind of editing is that? It's awful? So like mindless, just awful, But you know, to me, like I'm not going to pass up I'm not going to dismiss outright the possibility that Vince, like you know, got a got a kick out of course, not putting a clip in there of a dory getting tossed around by kind of
a relative nobody on the horse. It's just fucking it's unreal, unreal. So Vince is going to MC the the brisket cutting. He's got his corded microphone on the lawn of this double Cross ranch, I suppose is where they shot this, and you can kind of get a glimpse off to your right there are people lined in the street trying to bear witness to this fucking team production that yeah, or maybe they promised them fucking sandwiches. They smelled the brisket.
Brisket right exactly, That's probably what it is. Jimmy Hart is there because Terry Funk needs a mouthpiece and the WWF and so he does a lot of the talking during the course of this thing. Do you have any of it? Or do I just go I do I have?
I have?
When Jimmy Hart is making the sandwich, Oh, that's the heart of it. Let's let's share that that sound.
And here we go, all right, Jimmy Jack is Oh look, I hold you gotta pickt your self us out.
Yeah, I want to cut one. I don't kind a little slice of meat off here.
Look at this, this is great, beautiful.
Anything on how the Funks taught you how to do this?
So I understand that Terry Funk had something as far as the teaching of the finer skills of the barbecue?
Is that correct?
You better believe you know Texas born, Texas bread baby.
When we die, we'll be Texas dead.
I'm telling you right now.
But this is great.
This is this is real down home Texas barbecue.
But ride hose, baby, I wonder if I mean you you handling this is talking about Texas is a little bit out.
Of school, isn't it. I mean, you're not here anymore of a Texan than I am. Well, let me tell you what.
We wanted to bring you, a little Texas hat for you, some Texas chaps, and maybe big old Texas horse for you to ride here.
But you see, I'm not a I'm not a big meeting or anything.
I'm a vegetarian.
But I'm gonna load this up because.
What kind of that goodness?
You're not a Texan? Because I don't know if there's any true Texan. It's a vegetarian, right.
Hoss, No true Texan is a vegetarian. I'd like to say this. This reminds me of home, you know that.
I'd like to do this at home. I'd like to talk about home. There we go, Okay, I'd like to uh like to just say what you know, I'm a proud Texan, born and bred Texan. I'm always I've always proclaimed Texas as the only place I've ever been from. I sound like it, I live like it. I believe that Dory always finds a way to get his pedantic shit in. You know, it's like handing the mic. He's not going to give it back. It's like, oh fucking what, Dorian's come on exactly, knock it off.
Everybody's sitting around the barbecue, good time, everybody's eating. But there is one thing that's missing from this Barty, and that's my brother Terry Funk. My brother Terry Funk is the biggest party man in the state of Texas. Every week he sets up a barbecue just like that. He's not here. You know why he's not here. You know why he's not here. Not here The junk yard dog.
That's why he's not exactly And it seems to me that will he return, By the way, I would assume that anybody.
Assume me, yes, Terry Funk will be back.
We understand that the Jimmy Jacket, we can talk a little bit. Is Jimmy Jack's not exactly.
Well, Jimmy Jack is all right.
Jimmy Jack is okay.
Jimmy Jack is Jimmy Jack is twenty six years old.
He just hasn't.
Why have we heard of Jimmy Jack Funk before? Why did you keep him away? It seems to me that the report totally uncontrollable, even by the Funks.
Well, it's like I said, he's six years old. He's a great wrestler.
He missed out on the eighty four Olympics because of the boycott. Jimmy Jack is one of those good looking young fellows.
You see.
We keep a mask on him. He's one of those people that all the women can't stay away from. And I can't keep Jimmy Jack away from all the women. That's why he's got the mask on. That's why we've kept him in the Backgroundate, what how.
You dealing with this basting process over. It's looking great.
Look at this, Look at this?
You like a lot of sauce or what? What the hell you like?
E Vince?
Come on, man, I'm unknown to get into the saucer from time to time, but I'm not too sure about I'm not too sure about this.
Yeah, Georgia Horion, Yeah right, exactly. He's so funny from time to time and on the day to day basis here, on the day to day basis here, so idiot that he just then Vince just walks off. He just suddenly goes, why don't you take over on barbecue and wrap this sucker up? Huh?
You know, I'm good. I got someone else going on here. You know, I'm just not a big fan of barbecue.
Because he needs to be out of the scene. I want to go get my my, my beef and cheese wrap Texas Style.
The La Fan Wrestling podcast, the wrestling podcast that knows the boys need their candy. It's the Lapsed Fan. He's a fan wrestling podcast with Jack and Jpiro.
But because he needs to be out of frame when al Hayes gets attacked, because it's not like Vince's gonna stand up for him. So Dorry has a bucket. He goes, Al, you're going to put the sauce on this for me? Just just fucking knew it. You can see it a mile away. Oh yeah, good old Texas sandwich. Here, put on a little more sauce. And then Hayes slaps Jack's hand in the sandwiches, take your kruby hands off my scent. Jimmy says, this is our barbecue. Then has grabs Al
and dumps the barbecue sauce all over his face. And then Jimmy Jack chokes Al Hayes with a noose, wraps it around his neck, and suddenly shit gets very real.
It's very it's very real, it's very violent. It was very surprising, honestly, and he.
Made reference to it earlier. There's like a little mini fence below Al Hayes's waistline behind him, and as he's falling back, stumbling backwards, selling the noose, he trips violently over this fence. He claps, collapses pretty fucking hard. And then they just take him over to a tree and tie the rope to the tree and they're going to hang them from the tree, ye like you do all the mile Jimmy Hart's cackling and saying, what you're seeing, here's a sample of what we're going to do to
Junkyard dog. Yeah, let's not do that. Let's not lynch jyd Okay, let's not even make reference to it, im possible. Seriously, It's just it's not like, come on, guys, what are we doing here? Exactly? Where's your big buddy now? They say, taunting him awful, and they rub bread on his head as Hayes is gurgling selling the noose, and Jimmy Hart says you look good and slaps him, and Hayes sells it and convulses while Hart barks into the microphone, and that is the end of that scene, and Gene just
moves on. There's no moral indignation. That's just now that we're done with that amusement, we're onto Captain Leuel Banoboss, creator of the Spicy Sauce. By the way, this is all proof points that it's not all about food, right, fucking no, never about food. Brisk about food, the cookies here, cookies, you know, it's just that it's it's yes about the food here. Yeah, all right, I'm sure you have it. Gene refers to him as tosser of the pizza.
Pies yet the leuel veto priat or the spicy sauce tosser of the pizza pies and Gourmet Food Lover shows George the Animal Steel and Lauren Alfred Hayes the Old Family recipe for Christmas cookies.
I mean, I'm gonna I've got the whole I get the rest of it here. But so he's got a chef's hat on, and as usual, he's got this. He's got a button down shirt that is unbuttoned with exposes his completely unsanitary it's everywhere chest and belly, like you know, he's got.
The hair everywhere. God knows. It doesn't matter how many times that man showers. There is always sweat like just beating off of his off of his chest hairs, all right, like it is just completely like close yourself, Oh all right, just put button that shirt.
So imagine him after two days of not showering. Oh Jesus, like you lift up his tit like imagine what it smells.
Like.
It's it smells like a mix of stop of boh and onions. Stop. It smells like old El Paso taco sauce. Well that with the with the with the taco with a little more to dell in this, you know, it's it's not the sauce, the seasoning the beef, right, it's the seasoning. And there's just like you know, the scent of of of pork product. Okay, So so it's in there somewhere. That's right. He's got he's got over there, disgusting and he's got a table full of eggs in front of him.
My God, and his and his his, like you talk about his sanitary conditions that he needs to have when you're cooking.
And listen to the way he talks.
Yeah, first of all, the main thing I want instilled on everybody out there, you've got to have sanitary conditions.
In other words, if you've got a cigar or something like that, keep it, dug, keep it in the right spot.
Excuse me, Rob, If you get a cigar, keep it down, keep it in the right spot. Okay, Now what's that?
Do you have another? Do you have an extra hat for Alfred Days?
No?
I don't think I have a hat for the Lordship.
I don't know if he'd appreciate it. He looks a little soft to me.
But anyway, first one, you need a couple of ounces of water.
Hits. I'm using ice cubes.
They're a little diluted bit some Christmas spirit. So you get a little bit out of that. Okay, that comes.
Puts anybody out there.
George Steele loves Christmas cookies, all kind of color stuff. You want to bring him a Christmas cookie, feel free to do so. Now you take sugar approximately one in three quarter cups.
You know what I mean, you didn't go by.
Bye.
No, when you do that, don't mix your flower.
With the sugar, because you get a colectic review and it will congilate.
You gotta put it.
Watch, oh my god, watch and trying to take about a cup and a half use and a half of this now with his little hawk, open up and make sure you keep these sanitary conditions.
But I would like to see him. I would have loved to have seen this with you know, you know, like when they have those like with with Guy Fieri, yes, or a Bobby Flay like him, just fucking yelling and barking and all this ship purposely butchering the recipe right right, and they're just like, oh my god, like the fuck is going on here?
To keep about a cup and a head.
No not.
You take your butter, and I'd like to stress it's gonna be pure. You can use salted butter or unsalted. We don't care, but it's gonna be pure. But we modron nour right.
I'm not doing.
Fucking uncle's screaming not moderate. Oh God forbids, Yeah, I know.
Put that in the flow.
All right.
One, let's get this together. Two bars of butter. All right, you got that in there. And now now you got your sugar seppate. Now the final thing is eggs. When you get your egg and make sure you don't mix the white and the other together. Try to get them together. Put him in like that you're egging. Get a couple leggs put in there. And you can also mix two with the sugar. Okay, get a couple. Yeah, we put
all that together. We're gonna mix this up. Cookie white a minute, charge, you're not ready, We're.
Gonna make it.
We want him green Christmas spirit, just a matter for Christmas spirit.
And see that George of green colors. You know they he's a dicklus. We put them in.
Take the top off here, all right, here you go, put them all in the Christmas thing. Now you got it all together. Now about that, You've got to mix approximately two or three quarter cups of water. If you see what I met the water and there you go, get it all and make sure it's not lucky.
You see what I mean?
You still got love so that keep nexting.
Can use an egg if you want to, you get another egg.
Told take another lot all the time or running out of time?
Okay, here you go.
You take that.
Dumps the ball.
Can take.
I mean, it's just it's it's it's a clown show. It really is. It's a clown show.
That's what.
This is.
Nothing to do with wrestling at all.
Nothing at all. It's just like it's it's wait a minute, I think this is funny. Let's try this well.
Vince loves you know, food humor. He remember that, of course, how does the uncle Elmer? We at the end, sorry, the butcher a sean wedding end. It's a pie fight, right, It's big food fight. Everyone's slipping and sliding in all this food he had catered. Funniest thing in the world.
I just I don't understand. I don't understand. I mean, I listen, I like I like food humor as well. I like, I like, you know, food being thrown in people's faces, But it just it happens all the time, right on the on the on this thing, and it's like, I don't I don't understand that.
I was wondering who the actresses were in Fuji Vice and the actors, and I wonder who the audience members are for this thing? Yes, they really taped this on Tuesday morning at ten o'clock and no one's Mills, Maryland, Like, whether fuck did they find people to sit in that audience? They must have been Tighten employees. But they they aren't. They're in Baltimore, like they're in They're in Grantish, Connecticut. I don't understand Stanford. I don't understand. Wait, which part
are they in? I thought that they were in When were they in Stanford?
Oh?
You mean the employees are in Stanford. Yeah, it's not like they can just go down the hall and there are no isn't there.
I know that they did I mean they did hire I mean I was gonna they did hire Baltimore actors.
Oh you know this? Yeah? How did you find that out? I found out who the woman is in in the mating game? Oh you did yeah, Oh, I can't wait to get there. I try to, I try to kind of do a quick look, and I've got nothing. I can tell you. There's nothing for Angelico. Not a lot. It's not not a lot. But like I I know a little bit, just a little bit of it. This is where we need your help, Solar System. These are the kind of people we will fucking interview, you know,
oh seriously, because that's what we're here to do. Honestly, if I had if if, if if it, if I'd found it sooner, because it didn't even dawn on me until like I was watching it, I was like, oh shit, like this is I would have tried to to reach out, but it just was like, now that's not going to
happen me next time. But you the fruits of this potential labor because on the free feed we recently posted the interview we did as part of the Spotlight under the Cinemat Yes with Glenn Caine, who is the former pro wrestling referee who serves as an extra in a Fenway Park scene during the course of the film and his whole story is there and the only reason we could put Spotlight under the Cinemat is because he happened
to have that wrestling connection because he's there. Exactly. You can and look to that interview available for everyone now in the main feed for an evidence of what we can do if you just give us the ball, you know, I.
Mean exactly, Like I mean, you know, these people are out there and they they're they're they're you're never going to get it. Very lucky, right, We've been very you know, you know, we've been very lucky because you know, I I for me, it's usually comes from the desperation when I can't find somebody, I can't find information on somebody, and it's like, well I need more than this, and so then I'm then okay, Number one, they're alive, that's great.
Number two, oh wait a minute, are on social media?
Great.
I'm gonna find this person and I'm gonna hopefully they'll reach out. And you know, we've been we've been lucky with but you know, between Glenn and the guy uh uh Tony Tony van Silva and the guy who was in the end the in the marine movie, yes, you know, like it's in these these this is what is fascinating. These stories are what's so fascinating and how they like their stories are just I find it to be so yeah, invigorating.
It's invigorating because you know, you're the only person that's ever going to get this out of this person. Yeah, yeah, the only podcast that could justify that time sync, you know, right, and and also just the idea that you know, no one uh, I mean it comes from the we're you know, a very unique thing that you know, we don't care about the the big names, like everyone gets the big names,
Like that's not interesting to us. It's it's it's these people who have much more interesting stories and quite frankly, have nothing to lose. Yeah, they stood in the prophere, they're not they don't know, oh they're anything to people in the business anymore. Look, got our friend Brian Penry, the Former Times. I was just thinking of him, like I was thinking of him because like he's got no ties to it, and you know, he's not trying to
get a job, he's not trying to do anything. So it's like, I mean, I think he's trying to do things, but oh sure, yeah, yeah, yeah that's true. But you know, yeah, I would be fascinated to get a hold of these people. How about we see Nikola I Volkoff stomping Chief j strongbow a bit in the corner. It's a great entree to This is Your Life. Certainly an entree that's for sure. Here is uh here, uh well, yeah, here's a Gene Jeane talking about the next segment here this is your Life.
Another word the that age is of the TNT program is that it allows us to learn more about the personal lives in the World Wrestling Federation and just for some variety, we don't always find these things out in the course of a one on one interview. No, sir, on TNT, we do it off right. And here is another variation on a favorite television show, as TNT presents This is Your Life.
Nikolai Volkoff.
And I've got I've got the whole thing for this one because it's just it's it's quite is just one of the most bizarre and like, why why is Volkoff always the this like he just he gets so much attention. I know, it's so weird. Was I know he was big, he was big back then. It just doesn't it doesn't click with me because I think of him as the ninety two Rumble Nikolai Volkoff and million Dollar Corporation.
Having sent sign on his lapel instead of the dollar.
Right exactly exactly. He's just a he's a joke, right, and I get it, and I know people who grew up in that era. He was something, he was something different. He was he was a big I mean, I mean a main eventor yes, Beppa Mandol. He went against Bruno in the garden, right exactly. So here's thence on set with his book open. This is your night, your life, your knife. Yeah right here here is here is uh this here is Nikolai Volkov's life.
He almost single handedly works to promote peace, an understanding between East and West. I'm talking, of course, about the international Goodwill Ambassador, Nikolai Volkoff.
This is your life.
I know, les, it's a fucking baseball game.
Come over, how the feet on the sofa if you would.
I'm sure you're going to enjoy this, Nicolai, because tonight we're.
Going to tell you, hope somebody does and tell the entire American people your story.
Now we have a few surprises for you. So settle back on the sofa. This is your life, Nicolai Bolkov. Let's meet your first mystery guest.
The first time I met Nikolai Bolkov, he was stuck for an answer when someone told him hello.
When I first met stuck for an answer when someone said hello, that's fucking that is great.
Freddy, Bossy.
Come.
Aren't they supposed to guess the whole thing about this is your life. You're supposed to guess who it is or or like figured out. But he like just comes right out there, like right, and he just sits here like a buffoon. I mean, he is a buffoon, Nikolai Volkov. So, but it's just hilarious.
Brian, Huh, yeah, I can't believe it. I'm here towards dating game. Well that's all right. Afterwards, over with, we'll go out and have a date. Okay, change the same.
You know, the first time I never will forget the first time I met you in that gymnasium. You didn't know who I was, but I know who you were because I heard so many good reports about you, and everything I heard was true. He not only was a great wrestler, but he was a great price fighter. The man he lift every weight that was in a gym, broke all the records over there, undefeated as a wrestler, went on to win the gold medal in the Olympics.
That was the Olympics.
What do you care?
I just.
Simply will verify that. That's all.
That's right.
You don't have to give him all the dates and everything he knows about it. He's just trying to confuse me.
Well, this has been somewhat of a confusing relationship, has it not with you and Nikolai through the years.
No, it hasn't.
I mean it's been very, very.
After all, you did promise him the world heavyweight championship, and of course you have failed.
You know, well, I can't give it, help it because that pencil that geek Hulkovan won't put his John.
Henry on that contract. Number of opportunities.
Nonetheless, if you would please come with me, mister Blassie, into mister Volkoff's position over here in the past, if Alfredd you a hopsacked race would be something I'd like to see.
But maybe you could just have a little seat over there.
All right now, Nikolai, this next guest, I can't wait to see the expression on your face for this one, because this is gonna.
Be he I mean to me, it looks like he really has no clue what's going on? Or Nikola? Nikola, of course, he doesn't no clue. He looks like but I mean, he looks like that this next thing is a complete legit surprise. Like you got to look at his face because he just does not know what to make of this, like almost like he's trying to understand who this person is.
And s someone very very important to you, a big surprise for you. Now, let's hear the voice.
Nikolai, remember the summers we spent swimming in the bulga?
Here we go, idea, I don't remember.
Remember surely you remember the time we took the trip to Gorky Park and we got sick on the rides.
Who could that have been?
Don't don't surely you remember now.
Your very own sister from your hometown.
I no, God, Like they think it's funny that her name is older. They think that's comedy, right well, and and I again, he just does not. I mean, listen, I could. Maybe I'm totally naive, but he really does not seem to understand that he's being duped in a way, or that he probably doesn't even know what this is. Your life is never in the show, so he doesn't understand the format. It's like, are these people talking right? Who are these people?
Like?
Who's Freddy blasting? So nervous he is? I mean he's got this video because he's got this big dumb expression on his face like he's just not oh oh this is good, okay, yes, my sister, right, my sister. I mean she's you know, got your typical you know, Eastern European Russian get up with the you know, the Babushka and all that shit.
We are so proud of him and ivan Grad. He has made all of Russia famous. Every week, relatives from all over Russia come to watch for news of nikolae I on TNT. Ivan Grad is a very poor town. Money there, says scarce as a heat wave in Siberia. Growing up was very hard, but even then we knew nikola I was special. He was always making little jokes to keep our spirits high. And when we have the great scope production of Peter and the Wolf, guess who plays the cat?
What are the performance?
Free curtain comes.
In him.
He is always making little Russian animals from the pieces of weather beaten wood, wonderful.
His skin is a carver.
We are so proud of nicolaid, this is really touching.
Yes, oh my god, have these two out here and your sister, I must say you, there's a there's a resemblance when the high chick bones and yes, there's a resemblance.
You should be very proud.
I have something very special I brought with me. It's okay, I present to Nikola Nikolai. For years they sat on the man to peaks of our little one room cottage.
Nicola.
He loves the idea of this, of this completely. He's such a child, he's laughs like those juveniles ship. He doesn't understand. This is not funny, like it's it's pathetic. It's what it is, and which he has is like a like a baby picture of Nikolai, but it's his adult head super imposed on a baby. It's fucking funny all the time. I'm raw they put up on the titan try. Oh god, him cackle, I mean with that stupid front tooth. He laughs, Yeah, you know, just he's such a such a goofball.
Look at her head on that Olive that Nicolai.
What I like to do with this picture?
You know what I like to do with this picture, whatever you wish.
I like to hit him over the hit with it, bang bang some far he is for Let me tell you for what When we were little?
We were poor?
Right right? Everybody else the family is all working sixteen eighty twenty hours in the field. What is Nikola doing telling ripple jokes? He's carving animals out of what make himself.
Like a wrestler? He sounds like a douchebag?
Nicholas, How could you do this to me? They saved much?
What did I do?
He says? He says it, He's no fucking clue.
What's happening?
Literally means what do I do next?
Right?
Or it's like or it's like he's trying to get part of me. He's part of me thinks right, part of me thinks like he's he thinks that this is actually his sister, you know, like he doesn't understand, like he's learning to remember his childhood. That's you know, he's got a different memory than she has because she's not his sister.
So I could go to ballet school in leth.
He steals the money and by this horrible.
Outfit he's wearing, no that he is wearing my dream in Ivan. God, they don't want to rename it Nicolay. You know what they want to do with they you want to hang you in the main squares.
Well, it's it's just it's it's anarchy. It's anarchy. It's just insane, Anna Karenina archy, Yeah, yes, And I just who is this woman? Right, I'm fascinated, Like how do they source these women? Probably like a local theater company my guess.
Yeah, yeah, I would imagine, I mean, you know, and and again there's there's certainly no shortage of actors there, you know, they got big theater scene and in uh in d C.
You know.
So it's yeah, just it's is fucking insane. Again, what's the idea for like Nikolay's character development? Like if I see this right, the next time I see Nikolay, I can't take him seriously. And he's a he he had a proven money player are about him at a certain point in time, and you're like purposely sacrificing that because he happens to sound Russian and you can do some yuck yuck, you know that. That's kind of the thing. It's like in a vacuum and in and of itself,
it is kind of like fun risk taking. But do you have to do it with guys that actually we believed in in the ring for years. You know, right, do you have to reduce them to complete caricature parodies? I mean, I guess you do. I guess you do. But uh, yeah, the world got to meet Nikolai Volkoff's sister once upon a time on Tuesday Night Titans who Knew? Just bizarre?
And then up next is uh the the Adrian Adonnis makeover. Here I only have the intro to this one. Jean's intro. I didn't get much.
This was just.
Ye's.
Have you ever heard the expression that there is nothing sure except change. Well, here's a change that took place that none of us are quite sure. We're looking at Adriana Donnas during his reign with Dick Burdock as Tang Team Champions of the World. Somewhere along the line, Adrian came of the influence of manager Jimmy Hart had emerged as adorable Adriana Donnas. And let me tell you, folks, looking like this takes work.
Keeping The laps fan Wrestling podcast, the wrestling podcast that knows the boys need their candy. It's the lapsed fan. He's an lapsed fan wrestling podcast with Jack and Carno m JP Sorrow.
So it's a Donnas and Johnson versus Murdoch and Atlas and Johnson versus Murdock and Donnas, and they're exchanging rights and spit flies for Murdock's face and Atlas hits a leaping head butt. Murdock bales and bumps and then Adnna snatches him and holds him down as Dickie drops the elbow and Donna's comes in throwing. I'm pretty sure this is the match where Donnas and Murdock take the straps off of Okay Johnson and Atlas who had beat this
wild Samoans. We've seen both of those matches during the course of the Colosseum collection, both Atlas and Johnson winning the titles, and I believe it was Allentown or maybe Hamburg and then a Donnas and Murdoch kind of swiftly taking the belts off at team that in Johnson and Atlas, it seemed like they really wanted to make like the centerpiece of the tag team division during the national push, But there was, of course the disagreements with Rocky Johnson
and him taking some unapproved bookings at a time when Vince really was trying to consolidate his authority in that regard in Saudi Arabia of all places, taking a booking for a rival promoter, when Vince had designs on running the area himself, and so pretty soon relations chilled with them, and Tony Atlas broke off as a temporary singles baby face, And yeah, this is some representative of just how kind of neutered and cut off at the pass the Rocky
Johnson Tony Atlass World tag title reign really was. So that's all to say. We show all this just so that we have some context what we're about to see. Where Adrian Donnis with his manager Jimmy Hart is sitting in a chair. He's in a chair and he's getting his makeoverdone and he's being all pampered and he's got the heavy makeup looking like a what's her name from Hairspray. Well, I was gonna say, well, he actually does. He does look like the love child of gorgeous George and the
drag queen divine divine who played who played? Who was the original Edna in John Waters Hairspray? No, right, that's what I was thinking of. Yeah, I think that's probably what he's going for.
Yeah, I imagine he's going for because Divine was was Uh. I forget if Divine was dead by that point or not. I don't think so. I think no, because Hairspray came out in like eighty eight, I think, and a Donna.
It's another legit badass that the fans had have learned to believe in, a great worker, a great promo, had sellouts with Bob Acklam for the world title of the Garden taken hyper seriously, much like Volkov was. And here comes Vince and he's going to recharacterize you when now look at the state of the man, look at how he's being portrayed here. It's just a it's just a complete disaster. This guy. It is funny. It is funny hearing him speak, yes, looking like this, because his voice
is so you know, not. Yeah, he doesn't soften his voice at all. He just keeps it like with the
the strong accent and everything. And uh, you know, Vince talks about how he just simply has to look his best and he says he'll be the next heavyweight champion of the world, which is supposed to be funny, you know, in contrast to his physical appearance, and Jimmy Hart is urging the salon folks to not hurt Adrian Adonis's hair, and a Donnas goes Jimmy, I don't want to look cheap and they laugh in studio that is that is a fun game, like what gets the audience out of
T and T taping to pop? Yes? And when did they when are they silent? And Vince says, speaking of laughs, I mean, now, yeah, I don't make them look cheap. I'd don't don't let at the last laugh. Be careful what you say. Don't burn his hair, don't burn his hair, don't make him look cheap. I don't want to look cheap.
You never look cheap, you know what I Okay, So something that kind of dawned on me during this segment is that what I find so fascinating and and you know what I find because when you when you take it on a little bit of a more literal uh uh, you know, make it a little more based on reality. These wrestling managers are once they hire, they have their protege here, their their charge. They immediately accept all their quirks and all their differences. Jimmy Hart's fucking doing rotisserie
brisket for the for the funks. Here he is he is engaging and and helping uh Adrian Adonis with his with his his primping and his uh you know, his his beauty routine and stuff like that. Like it's really it's it's so wild to me. I mean, if you get a little bit more serious on it, it's an incredible show of accepting from the heel managers, you know, in terms of that, because like, in a way, you'd
think it'd be the opposite. They'd kind of be like, why don't I want to be around someone like this, you know, But no, they accept all their quirks and they completely buy into it and have to celebrate it. It's it's a wild it's so hilarious to me that that that they I don't know, I just never I never really thought of that as a thing.
Like these guys have to buy into all their you know, whoever they they end up managing, they have to buy into all their all their stuff.
Yeah. Yeah, it's true. They have to be the like a cheerleader, but almost like you know, just accept their baggage is like the highest and best version of this guy, right and take up the coach. It's a funny like psychological thing that I never really that's a good point, never even considered. They're so eager to please, so eager to.
Like Heenan the same way, like think of all the people that Heenan has managed from, you know, like you've got to you've got to accept all these all these characters.
Uh, you know, and they're there, you know, eccentricities, eccentricities, thank you, Yes, And Vince say, shouldn't he spend maybe a little more time on his physique as opposed to his outer look? Well, let me just say this. Earlier in the program, you saw a film that we did. Isn't it isn't isn't his outer look is you know, his physic. He is concidering about his outer look, and his physique is part of his outer look. Right, so you don't know what are you talking about? That is
the definition of physique in a lot of ways. It's not internal. But Jimmy Harp points out that Adrian wants weigh three hundred and five pounds right now he weighs two sixty seven and slimming down. A close up of his nails being done and god that Donna says, it is very big surprise. I do everything in stride. Adrian says, what was that? Do we know? How how did he feel about this? He was fine with it, Yeah he was. Yeah, he didn't care. I just cat jack. Yeah, yeah he was.
You know, he was always a true like drug problem, this guy right coke in particular. We played the story on Dark Side of the Ring unheard that Brett told.
It's all around. Yeah, you know how the fake Sammy Hagar got in the ring at the Garden one time and Adrian A. Donnas was kind of like the conduit to it, because he was the one that just, you know, just thought it was hilarious to do drugs with this guy and ran with this idea that it was the Van Halen r and then of course would meet a tragic demise in a car accident with Adrian Adonna's But yeah, I never got the impression that he was somebody that
felt affronted by this. It was just so he's one of those guys that you know, when is that National Spotlight portrayal, that's how everybody remembers him. And then you go and watch like how serious of a heel he was before that, you know, yeah, seriously, he was taken. It's like, wow, like this guy, this guy really just gave it all up to fit this Vince McMahon. You know idea of this traveling circus, you know, all these characters and everything.
Yeah.
Yeah, So they're going back and forth. He's saying, they don't know what nature is all about. These people, they don't know what feeling successful is all about. They don't know what feeling like a real person is all about. And I'm thinking, well, got them there, that's for damn sure.
So yeah, he's just carrying on in the in the beauty chair and talking about how when you can look out in the backyard and see the azaleas and the flowers and the petunias and all my favorite plants and the birds singing, I'm telling you, there's nothing like it, especially when you have these lovely women taking care of you. So yeah, he's kind of he's kind of doing the gold dust and that, like right, they're trying to get
the fans to like be homophobic towards them. But he's also surrounded by bucks and beauties, you know, right, Yeah, it's very weird. How much play on that. Yeah, so I'm talking about money is no object and and it kind of ends with well, back up, we'll be back with more and we're gonna stay with the Donnas to see if there's any improvement in Adrian throughout tn T. And we're back with the killer Bees. And they coude that in here. Of course we don't get the killer
blade next. Yeah, there's no killer right, I know they they do. The editing is very weird and there's no reason to keep that in exactly. They transition right to uh. Don Morocco is one extremely tough individual by any one's estimate.
We go.
Don Morocco has one extremely tough individual by anyone's estimate. The former uter contidental champion has faced the toughest opponents there are in putting some truly memorable matches with a heavyweight champion Hull Cogan. But where the Magnificent One relaxes, I must admit he does it with a particular shall we say stop?
Yeah the match noise that was Morocco vers Hogan in a cage.
Yeah, yeah, funny again. Another weird thing that that that is the only thing we see of Hull Cogan.
It's it. Yeah, I mean, for those keeping score at home. As to how rare hul Coogan actually was during the Golden period home video releases, it's it's it's remarkable. I had to be that contract man just pay him too much to use them, so they just used him as little as they could in a very strange kind of reverse incentive way. So you have you. Mister Fujik was talking about the magnificent Morocco, calling him a beach bum. Vince says, if you let's go to the tape.
Yeah, I've got I've only got I got one little bit from uh. Later on that he's when he's got all that oil on him.
Yeah.
Yeah. So he's surrounded by women in bikinis and fuji on the set of Tuesday Night Titans, and he says, this is before the match and after the match and in between in the daytime. That's how often I get this done to me before the match, after the match, and what was the sacond in between the and in between the daytime? Okay, so all the time? Yeah, that's another way of say Flower's day. Vin Vinson says, mister Rocco, you travel with your lady friends all the time. I mean,
is this is this an occasional occurrence. I want to learn more. Pal quite a bit of oil. He is, Moco, what do you.
What?
What do you?
What do you?
What is this?
Can tell me? How do you? How do you keep these women around? Do you pay them? Do they do you satisfy them? How do they sign documents? Do you sign? What is the what is the the disclosure arrangement that you have? How's the non disclosure agreement? Non disclosure arrangement? And this is where the oil hits his skin and he goes, oh, must have lots of oil. He talks about how the sun will come and penetrate his beautiful
skin and make it gold. And he says, you know what, I do have a lot of problems sometimes, Yeah, this is where I got I got a lot of problems. Here we go.
I do have a lot of problems.
Sometimes I have to have my bodyguards.
Mister Fuji has to uh has to uh.
He's doing a good job of right now.
He has to cracking out screens getting down there, mister Fuji.
Uh. But managers like him, people don't need enemy sometimes the.
I love, Yeah, I would think so, but but does that not keep you on your toes, mister Morocco, and keep.
You got on my toes, I got it behind my knees, I got out of my ears, you name it.
That's why I got oil, thanks to mister Fuji.
But we having a good time racking up, and I want my cross to be happy.
Happy too.
I'm very happy, mister Fuji.
How much oil our case of oil per month? And ten w what's it your weight of the oil? Ten forty, ten forty? Yes, any good for motouncle oil? Like moil they skins come.
It's like baby skin.
Baby scary.
Muscle comes all in between baby skin and make very tough.
You know what I mean.
Well, I'm gonna say, mister Morocco, this is we thank you very much.
Iran has nothing on us. Would say Iran has nothing on us. Iran is nothing on so much oil, right, I get it. He's got so much oil. My god, it's so fucking it's like it's just insane, it really is. It's just pure insanity. It's it's it's crazy what they fucking come up with. Like I know, like that's that's what I don't here's what we're thinking about. Yeah, right, well, well I only got an idea right.
Do you think about this? What do you about oil? What do you feel about oil? What are your opinions on the oil scene, Vince.
I don't really agree with OPEC and their artificial curving of production, of course, but what do you think about it? On your body, on your physical on your physical aperture, have aperture to gene. I've always believed that if you're going to have a nickname, back to the fucking nicknames. Oh my god, Jane.
I've always believed that if you're going to have a nickname, especially one you give yourself, you better be willing to back it.
Uphaps.
Let's go to the studio as you have a chance to match wits with a self proclaimed masterminds manager, Bobby the Brain. Heenen, as we play Baffle the Brain.
I've got the main part. I don't have the beginning where he talks about the manager of the year stuff.
Yes, yes, they're saying you're not officially manager of the year. He's saying, yes he is. As far as I'm concerned, I am, he says, as.
Far as I am. That's always my favorite. As far as I'm concerned, I am Manager of the year. Yes, that's most people are like that.
I feel absolutely Heenan continues to crack up. Lord l in ways convinced Loria Ali isn't supposed to be laughing. Yeah, but Evince says, not exactly. But in any event, at one point, oh my god, you've actually given this segment unbeknownst to you a little You've you've actually given this, Yes, you did, he says, you've.
But you've actually given this segment to unbeknownst to you a little title.
What's the name of it? Baffle the brain, Baffle the brain?
That should would be too difficult to Why don't we try?
Well, wait a minute, don't set me up here.
I don't know what questions you wouldn't ask me?
What I was thinking that you always say you know so much about wrestling.
I do, that's my life.
Okay.
Then I thought that maybe we'd ask a few questions and say, if you could answer them correctly.
You don't try to embarrass me, aren't you.
No, No, we wouldn't do anything about that, would we.
Evan?
All right?
Okay, the first one, okay, the first one of these questions you want to ask?
Answer these, I'll let you know if I feel like I answering.
Okay, is in three parts? The intercontinental title changed once in nineteen eighty five?
What city?
Baltimore, Maryland?
Absolutely right? Who won the intercontinental title?
That Tito Santana.
Well that's real difficult since when you consider that answered that one, I mean the guy hasn't lost it, So who won?
I mean we have had a title change since anyone?
Is he playing this game?
No, I'm the peanut section? Well, how do you do to them?
Okay?
Captain Louel Barno was once at tackle.
How do duty is? Bob backman man? I want you to listen speaking of how do you duty? I want you to listen to the way Vince says your time is up. A little bit of North Carolina comes out.
Oh my god, team champion himself. Two parts of this one. What was the name of the team and who was his partner?
That's a good one.
You're Tonytmore was not the name of the team.
That was his partner and the team was called the Sicilians.
Very good?
Okay, applause?
Not much, Fred Blessie, there's not much out here.
Remember I say, long career, very well known as a manager, but he only managed one World Heavyweight champion. Two questions here, One who was that person and who beat him ultimately for the title.
Freddy Blessing managed the Iron Chic.
Right, He's not bad, is he?
And the man that beat him is Hulk Hogan?
Absolutely right there, you're not doing too bad that okay?
Who held.
Who held all three w WF championships in his career and is still wrestling today.
Really well, now.
You're talking about the World Championship, yes, the World's Tag.
Team Championship and the Intercontinental the other three and he still rests.
No, Bernie, this his brain, I think the wheels we don't right?
Good? Okay?
The last one here, name two current managers who are on the inside of the wrestling.
Album, the rock and roll wrestling album.
Yes, the one that's just out the wrestler.
Jimmy Hart.
Right, who's the other?
Me?
No? Wrong?
No, you're not on the inside of wrestling album. You're you're wrong. No, I'm never wrong, You're wrong.
One.
Yes, inside there's Jimmy Hart and lu Al Battle. No, I don't believe that.
He believe.
No, you asked me who was the wrestling managers in there? Jimmy Hart, Loui Albano and who else? You mentioned somebody else? You didn't mentioned me to do that?
Oh no, no, wait, no, I'm not now quit.
Trying to make a phot on me out here.
I don't know you do that.
I can do that without you. I mean, I mean yeah, that.
Way, I mean right, I'm right.
The whole thing I mentioned it was Captain little Banto. I said Louis Banno and Jimmy Hart.
Didn't.
He didn't say I did this thing.
You heard me, didn't.
See. I knew you guys are gonna set me up one back with the others.
The others were, okay, No I named them.
I named them all.
Yes, I said lou Albano and Jimmy Hart except for that. No, I did say Loui Albano.
No, no, no, who do you think.
I did say Louis Bano?
No?
You did not. You heard me say.
Back tracking.
Ye, Unfortunately, mister Heena is leaving your premises in protest.
That's good stuff. Yeah. I wonder if he actually was put on the spot to answer those trivia questions. Yeah, I don't know. I mean it kind of sounds like it in a way. He answers them like not with a comedy or time like comedic timing. He just answers them like, yeah, he's thinking really hard about it, right he does, You're right, and more lejet that he gets it right, you know. Uh So we move on to
the Hillbillies now and Piper and all and all that. Yeah, it's it's Jesse Ventura in a ring Cowboy Bob Orton and Roddy Piper. We get a glimpse of a six man where they take on Hillbilly Jim, Uncle Elmer and cousin Luke.
And it's kind of wild because yeah, because they yeah, this don't they this is weird because they they show a little bit of this match.
And with Jean's intro, then they go to the studio. Then they show them match again again. Yeah, what the fuck is going on? It's very fucking weird. But here this is a this is Jean's intro.
Here talk about a match made in heaven. Jesse Ventura, Cowboy Bob Barton, and rowdy Roddy Piper team up in a six man tag against the hill Billys, Jim, Uncle Almber, and cousin Luke.
And that's and then then then you go to the studio. Oh, bizarre. It's very weird. There. You get Uncle Elmer and his honeymoon and his bride Joyce about ready, we're told to tour the Tunnel of Love and they make some you know, kind of un toured remarks about that. You ever been to the Tunnel of Love up in Niagara Falls? No, but if I got a few moments on the weekend,
you'll be lucky. Appreciate the invitation. Now I'm booked, you're booked, Yeah right, Well, in any event, I'm going to take you an out of a match that I'm sure that you and a will long remember. So this is but you know who's not booked, Dennis Damp. This is Vincent Piper going back and forth on the set of Tuesday Night Titans. And then Piper explodes to the promo saying,
I do want to say something. This match. You're going to see the difference between the caliber a bunch of fat slob hillbillies that come in there wearing four hundred twenty pounds and the different caliber professional wrestlers like Ace and myself. You just go ahead and take a look at it. Piper was fired up and high on these sets. Oh you can tell him he's fucking oh god, he's gone man oh man, he is on a rocket ship. I do believe that this match is from the when
they show the matches from the sun Dome. Oh really in Tampa December nineteenth. N fascinating. Yeah again, vent tour wrestling so much later than I appreciated inf oh for sure, despite that career ending injury. So it's a pure six brawl. They're slugging away. Jesse's in their feeding elm Or. This was on Saturday Night's Maine event. By the way, this matchup, I believe, yes, yes it was. So this is Jesse actually not just being the voice of snmy but actually
wrestling on the show. He's in there feeding Elmer and that's saying something. Uh Ben's an Enan. We're on the call, and Heenen suggested, Jesse warned me, you'd be like this. As we begin the vincok Man Bobby Heenan Chemistry, Piper is a headbutting hill billy Jim who hulks up and returns fire. Piper reaches for the tag but he can't get it, so he slaps Jim over and over and what a paint brush job. Vince McMahon says, backs Jim to the corner tags in Ventura, while Orton throws at
him from the apron. Jesse with her right hands and some clubbing shots, and Orton gets in with a running elbow. Piper gets in a lot of quick tags from the heel side. Hill Billy Jim blocks him and hits him and tags Luke. Heenan says, I don't know how you can tell them apart. And Luke is throwing sledgehammers at everyone and they're popping with each successive blow, double back, sandle and a slam. Tell me why that worked. I have no fucking idea why sledgehammer? No, No, the fucking
that's the hillbilly thing. Oh yeah, I know, like the whole fucking this. I don't get why this was. It gets so popular. Yeah, hill Billy Jim was, you know, I don't know if it was the hillbilly thing. I think it was just that Hillbilly Jim was Hull Cogan's associate in eighty six. It was kind of positioned as Hull Cogan's best friend. But then, how can you get this fucking uncle uncle Elmer and there you care so
much about his fucking wedding, like, what is this ship? Yeah, they kind of went that way after hill Billy Jim slipped on the floor but broke his leg in the middle of the biggest push you would ever hope to get, and they just needed a cousin, Luke, I think, to fill in the dates. And then here comes Tuesday Night Titans, and we have this platform to do these fucking you know, skits and these things that involve wrestlers but have nothing to do with wrestling itself. And yeah, there's Uncle Elmer.
I mean, you can't if you're Vince, you're not going to resist that temptation to do something crazy. He's fantastic. He's fantastic, that's right. So the pier six brawl breaks out. Orton drop so fucking you why it was a wide load? Pell Why this guy eats a lot? Pier six brawl breaks out Orton, it's a drop kick, and Elmer throws his weight at Aventura very least, but Orton blindsides Luke.
Cousin Luke and he and and of course says he must have tripped and just lost his footing and Piper puts the sleeper hole on Luke and falls on a seat and goes limp and the heels win back to the studio with rowdy roddy Piper and Bob Orton Jr. They're a plodding and jeering. As Vince said, did you not categorize that as a typical cheap victory?
Oh yeah, I got this, uh this, some of this here for up until up until well you'll see where it ends.
But but you not categorize it as a typical cheap victory.
Cheap?
No, no, no, no no, not not considering I got paid three times as much as they did, as I will, I wouldn't considered about fifty grand I wouldn't consider that a cheap victory. I wouldn't consider a cheap victory because they want to go out and retain all kinds of stuff about us, and all of a sudden they want to play big time. They get there, they get their butt knocked down. They're sitting down there like a lady on Saturday night. Menersit down there, boom, and they're sitting.
Quite well for themselves, and.
Fear staff on the body.
Piper put the man to sleep right there, I mean, right in front of God and everybody putting to sleep daddy.
Serious, he looks serious. How that Bruno Sammartino?
What more? All right, Well there's your shirt. More garlic, more garlic, more garland. Listen, I'm not gonna twist my arm on that one. Please. Then Vince makes reference to h Piper's track on the Wrestling Album, which, as we recently discussed, was what is it it's supposed to be? Go fund yourself? He replaced, He replaced the words I'm trying to remember what it is? Oh for everybody instead
of fuck everybody? Right, And they kind of talk around that and don't really address that on the fact that it's that it's a pun. Vince says to Piper, that's a nasty looking piece of chewing. Piper high as fuck is asked if he would be voted the best single vocal performer on the Wrestling album and and he would be right. Didn't he win that one? He did? Yeah, that's where he breaks. Heats the podium, right, collapses. He want something just I mean, he he's a mess. He's
a real mess on this fucking thing. He's like an overload. But at the same time he's like slowed way down. He's like almost his voice. Yeah, you know his voice is so I mean, he says he lost his voice, but he's a fucking mess.
Wow.
Yeah. They talk about, you know, if you want to find the true meaning of the title of my song on the album, will like the Beatles deal where you got to play it backwards and you need to have a high IQ. Orse. Piper put it one of over twenty one to figure it out. And yep, Piper's voice is shot for whatever reason. I don't know if he's just screaming on a promo or what, but he sounds raspy as hell, and he does. I mean, he sounds like he just woke up after, you know, an all nighter,
which she did of course, yeah, of course. Then says hopefully you'll take care of your voice so in the future you can come back and join us, and Piper goes, your hair looks nice, it's not receding anymore. Oh and then Vinn says, I had it fixed, and thus perhaps the genesis of Vince Wear's two day right right here on Tuesday Night Titans. It could be probably go back to gene a little retrospective on the now famous Fuji Morocco productions. Oh yeah, more of this shit. Here we go.
Acting seminar in coming.
A little retrospective on the Nile famous Fuji Morocco productions, along with a seminar on acting.
The Sling Podcast, the wrestling podcast that knows the boys need their candy. It's the Lapsed Fan. He's a lapsed fan wrestling podcast with Jack and Carnacio and JP sorrow.
Sounds fine and yeah, no, totally listen.
Listen because if honestly, I I wish I'd had the advice and the teachings have Don Morocco, you know, fifteen years ago it would been so useful.
It would have been, but it was not to be. Apparently, Yeah, so I wait a minute, it is Oh yeah, I got some Moroco foodie stuff. Yeah so I got this is uh uh. I believe it ends up with Vince pitching the clips from the stuff, and I've got all the do it the clips. But first, here's the here's him again. I don't remember what the whole thing and I know what he pitches to, but Morocco says something beforehand, there's.
The look I love so much and you do love me, or you wouldn't have taken on the set for me like you did at the nurses station.
Now prove you love me with a kiss.
Go home and kiss your wife.
You know I'd only be thinking of you.
She doesn't understand me. I can be myself with you. I need you, Louise. We've got so much going for us. Don't let that fact that I'm going back to my wife spoil a good thing for.
Both of us.
Do you ever stop and listen to yourself.
You don't make sense.
It's your face and your lips that have me so confused. You'll understand someday, maybe not today, but it'll be all clear. So too, you got to know I love you. Now kiss me and let me go home with a smile.
Stop it, stop it, forget him on?
What are you trying to do?
Kill me to beg with him?
You're not gonna get away this time.
You're very grateful, and that with out number five to one, they look like good odds.
To me from where I'm sitting, I'm gonna take care of you. Hand over that gun belt.
Don't make me laugh.
So this is this is now the Western Yes, this is Fuji bandito. And what's hilarious too, is if if you look at this supposed saloon, I mean it looks like it looks like the bard of the FW all right, like it does not look anything like a saloon at all. I mean it's got wood paneling. It's awful. It's just it's dreadful.
I want that bell.
I'll show you who's the fact.
Oh shit, that's going on here.
That's Mula, right, Mula comes in. She's dressed as a as a as a as a woman.
And then shoot interviews. Morocco would always been fun of how for some reason they just thought it was the funniest thing in the world to make Mulla his love interest in every skit he ever did. Yeah, and I guess it's funny to kill her in this one. So shootout in the salute bar.
I love you, I love you.
I don't need a glass.
Should still be alive if you hadn't come to town, Ringo, you killed my little Now.
It's going to be my pleasure to kill you, big mess.
Marshall's dead.
And oh and now this is so now this is the last one. This is Fuji Chan, which is obviously a play on the Charlie Chan movies.
It's just I don't know he's dead.
The stone is missing.
If only that great detective from Honolulu.
We're here, ladies and gentlemen, Inspector for chan greetings.
I'm sorry I'm late for number one song Daddy like do on lown of morning, cause.
We should say he who hesitates gets the worm.
Aw man, And look here, y'all, what's going down?
I understand you have murder here tonight.
What makes you think it was murder?
Great scott Man, Professor Biggers is lying on the floor with a knife in his.
Back, and the Sassafras stone is missing.
Sounds like circumstantial evidence to me.
A clue will speak for himself.
That alibi like smell of old lunch, cannot stand the taste of time.
There it is the taste of time. That's the line. He calls out. I just brewing the ship out of him. They are as they go back to this TNT set their boom Morocco like crazy, and Vince's I gotta say, every time I see that, it's the worst piece of acting ever. That's awful.
Here I got that, I think, to the Okay, I get a thing until they get through some Morocco stuff here, But here we go.
Every time I see that, I mean, that's that's the worst piece of acting ever.
That's awful. Are you kidding?
This is but there are traces of Fellini and that you see the cutaways, the shot and the pants.
He said Fellini, didn't he? He said Fellini?
And and what I don't understand is Vince was talking about your acting and now you're talking about Fellini, right, And it's it's very different director because because he's director, and I know he's now he's talking about visual style and whatever.
But oh, this is, this is it's like a mockery of himself.
It is.
I mean, there are traces of of of Robert Redford, like in the Robert Redford.
Oh yeah, there's there's so there's so many subliminal things. There's so many, there's so many great aspects.
So that you you don't have the depth, you don't have the perception in your mind to feel this.
You see. All I can say is you've never given it all to yourself. You've never given in to be able to get against the World champ.
You've never given in to be able to my knowledge, however, you have not received one legitimate offer from Hollywood, not one.
Well, the all the agents have been clamoring. I have been missed food entered my mail. They've been coming in all over the place, and you have had one thing off, whereas of course they've offered, they've offered. My wrestling schedule is extremely demanding.
I see, this training schedule is extremely demanding. And you know, no one fulfills as many commitments as I do. He says, But I've become obsessed with this whole business, this whole acting challenge, and this whole new career with myself and mister Fuji. I've become obsessed with it. And he says, the only answer to really set this off is to go to Hollywood, gett an agent and sent his material to the studios and so there, yeah, you go, We're
on our way to Hollywood. Jesus, oh yes, and yes, uh, I don't have any of any of this this part, but and says, would you mind, you know, since you started all this, if we followed you with our T and T cameras to see how that session goes, and of course it would be Don Morocco's pleasure. And that's that's exactly what happened. And they go to a secretary in the office and she picked the phone and says, mister Gelden, fine, yes, we have a mister Morocco and
mister Fuji to see you. And Fuji says, did you get a load of this pad? Did I tell you this was Hollywood? They're just sitting in like a totally nondescript almost looks like a pediatrician's office.
It's right, it's it's not even at all, even for back then. It's just it's not an office for that, you know. I don't know how, I don't know if. Again they're trying to play him off as being a bad agent or or or a good agent, but it's it's it's just it's not good.
There's a comment that, you know, everything is all white, and Fuji says, looks like snow all the time for mister Fuji confusion. Confucia say, man who has patients while fishing will catch more fish, so we'll catch the right agent, I think is what he said. Agent, Okay, but it looks like snow all the time. For Don Rocco too on the road. Oh yeah, right, whatever it was, it just got it got the corpsed Morocco. He put his head in his hands and started cracking up the.
The uh and I love that they turned to another guy who's waiting to be seen. Yes, and this guy has been waiting.
There for three days, three days, three days.
He's been waiting for a fucking meet. So he apparently has not left this office for three days.
Oh my god. I don't know what security's like in this building, but it doesn't seem to be good. No, clearly not. And they continue talking and that they're going to exchange a videotape I think it is or something like that.
Well, they got a videotape of the basically the the the sketches there, the right, you know, the skits, the Fuji vice and all all those things. They're going to show it to the agent and basically show him his He's they're going to show the guy his real is real, all right, his.
Acting as oppose to fake exactly exactly. So yeah, he's he's getting all he's getting all like irritated that he's not being taken seriously as an actor. Is Don Morocco. That's kind of the yeah me too. You call yourself an agent? Who are you an agent for? Arnold the Pig, Benji the Dog? Look, guys, why did you go back to wrestling? You're never going to be a producer. You're never going to be a director. And he says, I'm great at wrestling. This is Don Morocco. I mean, I
mean he fucking laughing that. The agent guy laughs at right in his face writ in Don Morocco's face as by his performance, it's it's tremendous. It is very straightforward. And then he says, I'm telling you get right now, get out of my office. So they're there's a there's a reality version of get out of my office. And then they approach some security guards in a parking lot, say they're here to see the head man calls himself Magnus of Morocco and you know this is my compatriot here,
mister Fuji. And they say, gentlemen, I've never heard of you before. And you want to see mister Johnson, who's in charge of the studio here, and to do that you need an appointment and out so your name on the list here again again, this is not a real studio, unbelievable, like like the studios that you know when you think about a movie studio. This is a rental spot. Again.
You rent out studio space to film your thing. And it's like it's it's I don't know if this was the only Again, I wonder, I'm very curious why why this was chosen and if they understood what this actually was, you know, like that, it's it's a not like a no one's holding meetings here, you know, no one's no one's, no one's green lighting a movie. You know, they're they're this is where you make your movie. You film your movie here when you know, I imagine it's cheaper than
filming on like the Universal Lotter whatever. So it's just it's wacky. At some point they flash forward to like an ivy wall and they say, we've been to MGM, We've been to Universal, We've been to Paramount. Now we're at oh no, Raley Studios. Yeah, man Udio again, Man Raleigh Studios. It's so fucking weird. So yeah, they're trying to get trying to get in, trying to get put in a good word. And he says, you know, sometimes we know Christmas can get a little rough. The kiddies
don't get all the goodies. They want the trees a bit bare. We can make life very happy and very interesting for you, and the talking about the rest of your family are you offering me a bribe, sir, No, it's not a bribe, a personal favor that we're doing you by letting the studio grow. So he's or bribe his way into Hollywood because he's just so such a
natural for it, you know, that's the the idea. And he talks about that, goof hold Cogan filming this cartoon show coming up, and they say, uh, he's starring in it, which is funny because not only is I mean well, they say he's filming, he's filming, make any sense, doesn't make any sense. You're not filming an animated show his voice either, and wrestler isn't even Hulk Cogan's voice, right,
it's fucking it's fucking uh, everybody loves Raymond there. What's his name, Brad Garrett, Sure, Oh my god, yeah, it's it's it's it's jumbled mess. But Morocco getting across the the still simmering feud with with Hull Cogan, yep. And then Jean's getting makeup done, yep.
He's he's actually filming. I guess he's filming the whatever you call it, oh, whatever you call the things that come in between. You know, you film before you go, you go to the to your main show, you have this. They introduce it and then they cut back to you before commercial break. Oh, I can't think of it now, like, uh, I can't think of it. But it's it's like it's
like the like dinner in a movie, you know, the intertition. Yeah, kind of interstitials where you kind of come back and forth, you know, commercial breaks and whatever.
Absolutely, so a Morocco and food. You walk in and what are you, gentlemen doing here? Well, we realize you're film and Hulk Coogan's Rock and wrestling and no one, of course, what great actors we are, he says, what great skills we have. We've come to bail you out, gentlemen. I'm okay, yeah exactly. They say there's no scripts with either of you written in. So I just don't see that there's a place here. No scripts for these guys.
I find that hard to believe. And so they're about to like walk out and or at least try to fight, and sais, gentlemen, on second thought, I believe we do have something for you. Come on if you would. And then they're on the set and Jane is there, Gene Jenoklands already there working on the whole Coved Rock and Wrestling show, and they show him talking about the special guests that they have and all of that, and he interviews Jene Okerland, Jenokalan interviews mister Fuji and welcomes into
Hull Coven's Rock and Wrestling. It's your pleasure for us to be here, Me and Jane, me and Gene. He says, your pleasure for us to be here, Your pleasure yep, and talks about a letter. He has a fan letter from a Mikey Milani, Semi Valley, California, and he says that he has seen Morocco and Fuji and Fuji general and all the rest and his acting prowess, and he says, just you know, you're doing a great job. Loving kisses from a wonderful fan. And so they're looking through the
letters and stuff. I know that he's part time watching Mikey. What does he know? See, I don't know why I wrote that one down. I know he's part time watch hard time Mikey. Mikey. That must be the letter. Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, mike Yeah, little Mikey is from Semi Valley.
Is the.
Is the the person who wrote this letter that was apparently addressed to Don Morocco, despite no one knowing if Don Morocco was going to be in the fucking building.
How does he know?
Right?
Got it?
Like?
How does he? Yeah, that's what he means by what does he know? It's very confusing. I mean, Hulk is definitely not down with this whole thing and didn't understand why it was kept on your tape. You know exactly, Oh why Morocco. I know you might have a hard time believing this. Listeners, but Gene Okland at this point and the tape, confesses that he's running out of things to say about Rowdy Roddy Piper. I don't think ever runs out of things to say about anybody, right, I
don't think he ever runs out of things. He says, He's always got something. Just when you think it's all been said, he'll come up with something different. And here for the Christmas T and T show, Piper gives his own version of the Dickens classic a Christmas Carol. Oh yeah, oop, sorry, I have this whole thing here for you.
I for one, am running out of things to say about this man. Yeah, just when you think that it's all been said, he'll come up with something different here for the Christmas P and T show his own version of the Dickens classic a Christmas Carol, and he likes to call it Ebene's or pipe.
I you know, I didn't do that if we've done this one, so I don't get it. Yeah, it's available.
I didn't.
I didn't record it. Go listen to it. It's if I cannot have to put what put this on again? I'm happy. It's just, you know, he's in his pj's and the ghost of Christmas present past they come in and chains and he makes a whole bunch of smart alec remarks and tries to write comedy.
And and and they and the you know, the guy playing Marley is like stereotypically Jewish and stuff and yeah, yeah, you know, it's all it's just.
It's such a goof thing. Yeah, it's such a fucking gool it's it was. It was seasonally appropriate when we did it around Christmas time. Yes, yes, for sure, find it in the archives as we get a bit of repetition here. But one thing we do see for the first time, Boss is the heart foundation on the dating game or the mad.
O My God, So okay, to set this up here, you've got I'll get well, I'll let I'll let Gene do his thing first.
The Heart Foundation, jim the Anvil, Night, Heart, Bread, the hit Man Heart aren't accomplished and successful team out of the guidance of Jimmy Hart is the mouth of the sop, So go ahead. There is, however, another similarity. All three of these young men are bachelor's and as such, our T and T producers thought it might be interesting to recreate a popular TV game show to see just how what would work with three young members of the World
Wrestling Federation. So here's the game where love is the prize.
As we start the mating game, so.
Vince calls this woman Phoebe Yes. He does, and so I just I had done a quick search for phoebe yes TNT mating game and the name Phoebe Zimmerman came up, and I just did a quick search, and yes, it's very I'm pretty sure it's her. I mean, she has a LinkedIn and she is I mean, and she's from Bethesda, Maryland and she is a voice actor. Now she's a voice actor and does an audiobook production as well as
read's audiobook on her website. She's got a whole thing of of demos and TV spots and whatever, and yeah, and she's available for work.
She's available for interviews. Sadly, sadly, I'm sure she is. Sadly. You know, she does not mention in her job experience. I shot a scene for WTNT. But you know, if you look at her, you know, she has her head shot up on her LinkedIn. It's it's very clearly it's her. I love it, you know, like, you know, obviously she's what.
That was forty years ago, so she's you know, she's a little bit older now, thirty years ago whatever, forty years ago.
I guess Jesus, that's that is sobering to say the least. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but yeah, so that's pretty crazy. Talk about how long a man should last? What do you think? Oh my god, here, obviously this one I have the whole fucking thinking. This is just Brett Hart nineteen eighty five. Okay, yep, yep. Did he talk about this in his book? He did not talk about the Maiden Game in his book. Wow, just like he didn't talk about the European rampage flirtation
that we yeah, we know. I wonder if that'd be interesting to find out what if what if phoebe uh you know, I found out what was behind those glasses, found out what was going on. Maybe maybe maybe she was a target for the hitman.
Here we go, so start making up your mind by firing away with questions, if you would please, And remember this is a family shot, So go ahead.
So excited? Okay, okay, bash or number one?
How do you know?
And it's the right time to kiss a girl for the first time?
Well, you see, there's certain parts of your body man to send off that.
I mean right for right there, I mean, come on, well we're starting off very promising.
M hm.
Certain they're part certain parts of your body. Okay, Jimmy, I don't need I'd never want to hear Jimmy Hart talking about certain parts of your body. Ever. Ever, til Brett talks about ravaging her body, I can't.
I know.
He does signal and then man, my feet start moving, my legs start grooving, and then my old lips they start cooning the words, and every girl wants to hear.
Man, that's what I know.
It's the right time.
What was that even mean? Rhyme words? Together, my lips start quoting and they and that means it's the right time rooning, I think he said crooning. Whatever, God, all right.
Bash their number two.
I know how long you can last in the ring, but how long can you last in the bedroom?
What the fuck?
I mean? This is?
I guess it's late night television. I suppose you know, later night television, you know, eight to ten or whatever.
I guess.
No, we're not here, Like you said, two hours was only was a short short lant Yeah, but they might still have been Nonetheless, it's that's so direct, you know it is. I mean, she's asking, she's asking how long till he comes? How long till you Tuesday night? Yeah?
Yeah, it's the la Fan Wrestling podcast, the wrestling podcast that knows the boys need their candy. It's the Lampsed Fan He's fan wrestling podcast with Jack and and Jpso.
Let me put it this way.
I can last to the ring for least at least a couple of hours, but at nighttime I could pretty well say from my past experiences, I could go all night long.
This sounds.
Yeah, he definitely does. I mean, also, you know, a couple hours is good to you know, Brett, you don't have to go all night long. But from you know, I don't know.
That's not what his father taught him. That's exactly, even in the bedroom. Even in the bedroom, have some discipline, all right, Brett.
Number three?
If I was to see fireworks while I was making love to you.
Again, yeah, aren't they just coming out with toys around this time? Yeah? Yeah? Making love to Jim the anvil nightheart. Oh my god. Okay, all right, it's fine, listen all I'm I'm just saying, look, it's fine. I'm glad that was your your conclusion, because that was my takeaway as well.
Yeah, exactly would I'm more than likely think of a roaming candle, a sparkler, or a wet fuse.
Well, let's put it this way. Let's put it this way.
What are you familiar with the nuclear crisis in Russia?
With the crisis. Oh, he's horrible, he's crisis fucking mess, this guy. Crisis. Yeah you could say that again. Yeah, there's a crisis happening, right, fucking idiot.
Deep burning desire that leads to a maximum climax.
I can't believe my ears. Some kind of stuff. Russo couldn't even get across the transom.
I know, I know.
Climax Jim Knightheart's climbers. Never need to hear Jim Knightheart say the word climax.
Ever explosion.
Okay, back to you number two.
Do you consider yourself to be more of an arm wrestler, a leg wrestler, or a tongue wrestler?
Oh my god, Well, I can wrestle with my arms, and I can wrestle with my legs. But since I'm from a very cold climate in Calgary with the mountains, I know he's always run. I could always lick my nose.
I got a lot of lick his nose. You can always lock his nose. He's being too boisterous. It doesn't it's not him. It's not his natural state at all. No, he is fucked, actually at the time fucked. I'll get it all right, load it up with so much fucking shit drugs, all right, the Adrian Donna's cocaine days, Yeah, hear him. Tea is just fucking fucked up.
Practice.
And by the time I grew up, I could lick my eyebrows.
So the fuck does that even mean? In a big tongue and you can eat that pussy. I listen, I get that, and I'm listen. Great, I'm all for that. Why don't I don't understand how you can lick your eyebrows? I also don't understand why this is something you want to talk about to try to seduce this young woman. You realize being able to lick your eyebrows means you can completely cover your eye with your tongue, Like, no, you can't.
Yeah, like yeah, I mean that's your tongue extends for like another four or five inches.
Please, I'm a tong wrestler and all at all fossil to the uh cats.
Yummy yummy.
Okay, number one, what is your idea for play that can't.
Well?
First of all, man, this this never fails.
I'd like to take you over to my part.
First of all, man, oh so hot, Jimmy.
Yeah, I turn the lights way down low, take out some baby old man, and all up my megaphone and stick it right in your ear and sing.
The most beautiful love songs you've ever heard in your life.
You know that's that always works for me.
Man.
Okay.
The post that we were in Alaska on our first date and we were stranded in the snowstorm?
What would you do to keep me warm?
Number three?
What does the anvil do to keep a young woman warm?
Desolate?
Cold, freezing igloo type area?
What?
Many? Many men?
Many things, But since this is a family.
Show, I won't get too intricate.
But it wouldn't be nice.
Let's go back to number one again.
Why would I want to make love to you more than the other bachelors?
Oh my god, Well, I think bachelor number three just came down with a case of TV. I think that's called twin bellies.
And the guy we're at.
Number two, he's use this greasy, greasy kid stuff me. Hey, baby, the don want a professional wrestler?
No, no, no, no, no.
Number two I'm reminded of. I'm reminded of of grumpy old men. Yes, Jimmy Hard is a regular. Don Juan, no wonder the ladies, Don Juan anything.
I was a love sick girl and you were doctor feel Good, what would be your cure?
Well, you see, he's the greatest.
Definitely listen, I'll say, doctor feel Good is in You better believe that.
Professional rest And what I would do if I was going to make a poor little girl like you feel better is that slap a sleeper hold on you, put your sleep and throw on the shoulder fireman's carry.
Then I'd running up to.
My room and I rep Oh, my god, Brett, no wonder he doesn't talk about this in this book. Sleeper hold you gonna knock her out and then not take advantage of her. He's gonna fucking He's gonna fucking Okay, they did this firemans carry her? Hey, they did this, b They aired it on us A see they re aired it on their home video release. That's how spent they were with a job done here. It is, It is just on.
It's unbelievable what they what they did here, absolutely absolutely atrocious.
Anyway, here we go, so start making up your mind.
What happened? He ravager? That was the key moment. I know where did it go? I know it's the key moment. Dear, Oh, don't.
You know.
What I would do if I was going to make a poor little girl like you feel better? Is that slap a sleeper hold on you, put your sleep and throw you over my shoulder firement's carry.
Then I'd run you up to my room and I'd ravage your body. All right?
Maybe time.
Tell us who that's just like dark, ravage your bodies. He's how cold? Like you still think that's hot? Put a choker fucking unconscious first, I mean even even as a as a The thing is he's high. He's high. We get interview her to see what she thought about some of this dialog. I mean seriously, because like like what I what what I'm what I And this is just my speculation. I don't want to there's no true accusation here. I'm not trying to say anything.
Is that this is what he would do because in that, in this moment, I think his answers are completely honest. Absolutely, in this moment, I'm not saying he'd actually do it, but like in his mind, in his drug riddled mind, right now, this is what he would do.
To her, and he thinks it's hot. All right, you want him to say, I mean, Julia approves. I'm saying, this is a man. Okay, this is a man. You're damn right, best there is there was best ever? Will bet you only choose one choose I'm not going out with any of those morons. You're damn right.
Who is the lucky guy?
Is it?
Bachelor number one? The Bachelor number two bachelor number three. Remember, you can only choose what one.
You gotta be kidding.
I'm not gonna go out with those morons.
You're not going to go up with any of them at all.
Getting out of here, color me gone, Okay, let her go.
Vince wanna go?
What a real power, a real.
Good enough for a start?
That's right, man, turns us down, nobody trys Come on, who cares for good?
Or what a dog man?
Because no second chance?
Gentlemen, We do apologize for this, but well, nothing like this has ever happened.
And in the entire history of the mating game. Phoebe is out. She's disqualified for being I think a.
Poor, sport stupid well, whatever you think. However, she loses all on her chests to split ten thousand dollars with one of these bachelors. However, fortunately, our wise producers have always had a contingency plan for almost any crisis, and especially such a disaster we've just screened. So we have thousands of girls who really wanted to be the bachelorette, and as a backup, we have a special backup dating.
One of them is standing by backstage. She has been patiently waiting in the wings and listening to the responses.
I'm sure of our.
Three super bachelors. So you'll be able to make a hopefully she'll be able to make it.
You'll be able to make a choice.
Well, we'll have a substitute for the very ill mannered and ill tempered Phoebe. So please, everyone, won't you give a warm welcome to our substitute, Miss miss Yolanda Jones.
Comes out looking at pat from the huge mole on her face, I said, I wrote, she looks like the love child of Melissa McCarthy and stell Getty and she's got a huge mole on it, which was Vince's thing with Gillian Hall too. Remember he thought it was so funny to have a huge hole on a woman's face. Yeah, ugly and the boogeyman ripped it off and ate one times?
Right, all right?
Uh?
First, Yolanda, have you have you heard the answers given by our three.
Bachelor You bet your buns I have hunt.
They were all wonderful, but I can't wait to get my hands on bachelor number three.
Faction number three.
Is Jim the Anvil, Night Heart Anvil, come on out and meet your London and wait wait a minute, you're not going anywhere now. I'll ever remind you that you have signed a contract, all three of you dead and when you met your bachelor at it clearly states that you must go out on the afore mentioned date once you have met the lady in question.
So therefore it is now official.
It is an obligation, that is it.
She loves cracking. Yeah, oh yeah, he's a mess, Jimmy, what's that on her face? Jimmy has his hand over.
Yeah, real cute.
I'm laughing.
My guts ound.
Me too. Yeah, I think that's a perfect question. That's a great my got sound. That is that is not exactly what happened here as we toured ww's most Explosive TNT show Explosive tn T show. It is a weird fucking tape. And I don't know, like if you didn't know about this stuff, like you must be thinking, like
what the hell was that? No wrestling, no matches, nothing, just nothing, just bizarre, bizarre, fucking incongruous, like wrestlers being paired with concepts that don't go together and punchlines that don't land, and people just fucking going insane and calling it entertainment. You know, acting out acting like children. So
we do hope you enjoyed it. It is a centerpiece of any Colisseum home video collection and we will see you next time when we reach back onto the shelf, Boss and pull out the latest installment.
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