Doug Smith on How To Handle Transitions In Our Lives

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Well leader, it is August of 2022, and I'm taking some time to unplug and refresh. And as a result for the entire month of August, we're gonna be playing Encore episodes. These are some of our favorite personal lessons and some of our favorite conversations over the course of the 300 plus episodes that we've recorded. And I really think that these will add value to your life.

And in today's episode specifically, you'll hear a personal lesson I did a few years ago called how to handle transitions in your life. And if you're going through a difficult transition or, you know, someone that is this episode is for you or them, please get this in their hands. I've sent this to so many people going through a transition, and they've told me that it's helped them immensely. So if you're going through a transition, you're gonna love this episode.

But before we dive into it, just a few announcements. This episode of the podcast is sponsored by bar tongue advisors, the financial advisors at bear tongue advisors, help educate and empower clients to make informed financial decisions. You can find out how bear tongue advisors can help you develop a customized financial plan for your financial future by visiting their website@beartongueadvisors.com .

That's B R a T U N G advisors.com , securities and investment products and services offered through LPL financial member, FINRA, and S I P C bear , tongue advisors, LPL financial, and L three leadership are separate entities. I also wanna thank our sponsor. He jewelers they're jeweler owned by my friend and mentor John Heney, my wife, Laura , and I got our engagement and wedding rings through he jewelers. And we just loved our experience.

And not only do they have great jewelry , but they also invest in people. In fact, for every couple that comes in engaged , they give them a book to prepare for marriage. And we just love that. So if you're in need of a good jeweler, check out, he jewelers.com. And with all that being said, let's dive in. Here's my lesson on how to handle transitions in your life. Enjoy Everyone today . I'd like to talk to you on the subject of how to handle transitions in our lives.

I'm running this lesson, cuz in the past five years, I've talked to so many leaders about transition in their own lives. I've talked to many leaders who feel like a transition's coming. Uh , I feel like many leaders I've talked to or in the middle of a transition and of those transitions. Some were good transitions and some were bad. And I talk to people all the time who have been through transitions in their life and that they are still being impacted by it today.

And uh , in some cases it was the, the best thing that ever happened to them. In other cases, the transition is causing them to be bitter , uh, and have a lot of resentment and it's holding them back from ultimately the future that God has planned for them. And so in those five years of talking to leaders, I've been just sharing lessons that God's taught me through lessons of transition in my life and I've gotten all kind of feed , good feedback on this.

I actually did a blog post , uh, the other week on exactly this podcast. And I got a ton of good feedback. And so many people were going through transitions and don't know how to handle it and said it was really, really , uh, beneficial for them. So that's why I'm writing this lesson. Before we jump into the practical parts, I wanna recommend a resource to you. Uh , this is one of my favorite books by Dr. Henry cloud . It's called necessary endings.

And uh, the title kind of says it all but necessary endings. And he really just talks about how , uh, how literally in life, some endings are necessary, some transitions are necessary and we have to get used to them . And if we're really gonna reach our full potential, then we have to be okay with seasons ending with jobs ending , um, and with just seasons of our life changing.

And so I really encourage you if you haven't read that book and you feel like you , uh, are in the middle of a transition or feel like one's coming up, I really encourage you to read necessary endings by Henry cloud. I'll be quoting him a lot throughout the lesson.

So again, my purpose today is to simply share some lessons that I've learned about seasons of transition in my life and whether my hope is that whether you're about to transition you're in a transition or you're on the other side of, in , uh, a transition, I really hope that this podcast will encourage you and help get you through that. Uh , and you'll be better for it. So that being said, let's just jump right into the lesson.

And some of the lessons that I've learned about transition, and I wanna start with talking about good transitions , uh, what to do in good transitions and you know, was there some good transitions in life? You know, maybe you got promoted, maybe you got a new job that , uh, has more responsibility. Maybe you became a parent. I would say, that's a pretty good transition. I just became a parent. So I'm actually in a season of transition myself, as we speak, I'm learning how to be a parent.

Maybe you're getting married. Uh , there's all kind of good transitions that take place in our life. Uh , and just cuz they're good, doesn't mean that we're not gonna have to do something , um, to adapt and make it a good transition. Uh, I remember , uh, one of my fondest stories when it comes to transitions was a guy named Bob BEO . I was listening to a , a CD by him and he talked about how he interned at a , a psychiatrist's office for a summer.

And they , he was in a counseling meeting one time and this guy came in and he was counseling and he just had his third baby. And he said to the doctor, he said , uh, man, when is life gonna get back to normal? You know, three, having three kids is absolutely crazy. Like I just want life to be like, it used to be, I want it to be normal again.

And the doctor just smiled and simply looked at him and said , uh, this is your new normal, this is your new normal there's no normal life will never go back to being as easy as it was with two kids or one kid or when you were just married or when you were single life is never gonna go back to, to being as easy as it was. This is your new normal. And as a result, you're gonna have to learn to adapt to your new normal.

And that's that lesson's always really made a big impact on me , uh, because I've had all kind of new normals in my life and with every good transition in your life, there's gonna be a new normal. And how do you navigate good transitions in your life? Uh, I've been trying to put words to it for years and I finally , uh, found a resource actually that spoke to it way better than I could. And so let me recommend this resource to you. And then I'll tell you what I learned from it.

Um, this is the be these are four questions to ask yourself in the midst of a season of rapid growth or a good transition. And I got these from Matthew Keller. Who's the pastor of next level church in Florida in Fort Myers. And he has his own leadership podcast that I encourage you to check out. In fact, he covers these questions in his , uh, one of the episodes on his podcast. It's called how to not lose your way in seasons of rapid growth.

And again, if you wanna listen to that, I'll include a link in the show notes, but you can simply Google Matt Keller's leadership podcast and you should find that, but here's the four questions he says to ask yourself in a season of rapid growth or what I would call a good transition. And in fact, these are questions I'm asking myself now , uh, that I just had my first kid, but here are the four questions and I hope they help you. I hope you're taking notes.

Number one, what priorities do I have to shift as a leader? What priorities do I have to shift as a leader? There's a new season it's or a season of growth. It's a good transition. As a result, I'm gonna have to change my priorities. Uh , you know, as a new dad, I'm gonna have to have new priorities in life. My baby is now my number one priority over a lot of other things that I was doing that were great. Um , but now I have a whole new priority in my life. Um, that, that takes over a lot.

And so I need to change my priorities. So what am I doing? I'm looking at my schedule. I'm looking at everything that I invest my time in and saying, is this a priority? Is this even necessary, et cetera. And , and what do I need to prioritize? How can I put in my calendar that I'm prioritizing my daughter and my family. So you have to ask yourself, what priorities are you gonna have to shift? The second question, ask yourself in a good transition.

Is this what skillsets will I need to improve in order to ready ? Get ready for the next level? What skillsets will I need to improve in order to get ready for the next level specifically? Again, I know I'm talking family life, but having a kid I'm thinking, okay, what skillset sets do I need? I'm gonna need to get better at delegating. I tend to take on too much myself and do too much of the work myself. So I need to find people that'll help that I can hand the work off too .

So I can really make my family a priority and go to the next level in my family life. I need to develop that skillset more. Uh , and you know, as you're going through a new transition, whether it's a new job, et cetera , what skillset do you need to learn to go to the next level? Great question. Question. Number three. What disciplines do I need , uh, in this new level with a good transition? What disciplines will I have to up? What disciplines will I have to get rid of again?

Uh , you're , it's the same thing with skillsets . You're gonna have to put new disciplines in practice if you're gonna gonna go to the next level in a good transition. And then finally question number four and I love this. What temptations will I need to be aware of in this new transition? What temptations will I need to be aware of in this transition? You know , uh, having a baby there's more stress in our life.

There's more , uh, there's gonna be temptations for me to want to stay at work longer, cuz I don't want to go home and take care of the baby. I don't know. I've heard things like that, right. But what temptations are gonna come my way? Am I gonna get greedy for money? Because I have to take care of my family now and I am I gonna start pursuing a job simply because I can make more money somewhere. Um , what temptations do I need to be aware of with whatever transition you're going through?

What temptations do you need to be aware with aware of? I just really encourage you to think about that in life. What temptations do you need to be aware of? And I think if you'll ask yourself those four questions that Matt Keller talks about , uh, when you're having good transitions, it'll really help you navigate that transition. Well, so that's really all the time I really wanna talk about as far as good transitions, cuz those are always good, good transitions are great.

You know, other than really having to, to grow to the next level, not a lot of work you have to do with a good transition. So I just wanna spend the rest of the time talking to what I talk to most leaders about and that's uncomfortable transitions, uncomfortable transitions. Henry , let me tell you about these Henry cloud says this about uncomfortable transitions. He said there are also those endings that are forced upon us endings.

We do not choose, but that we cannot work through very well either. As a result, we remain in pain or stuck, unable to pursue a new phase in life. These endings include divorce being fired or laid off death of a loved one disintegration of a friendship, chronic illness . And so on. We do not choose these endings.

They're thrusted upon us by the people we have trusted and sometimes by truly horrible events in life, if we're not prepared or have not had too many losses before these endings can render us broken, depressed and floundering sometimes for years, sometimes for years and listen, even if, if you, even if you quit your job right, and it's an uncomfortable transition. And I think it's so important to that last , uh, sentence is so important by Dr. Henry cloud .

When he said these endings can render us broken, depressed, floundering sometimes for years. And that's where I see a lot of leaders in the midst of transition B. They end up being in a place where they're bitter , they're broken, they're depressed and they're floundering and they literally waste months and years of their life. Um, trying to recover from an uncomfortable transition.

I know for me, I went through an uncomfortable transition and I went through about a six month period where I , where I had a midlife crisis. Um, I was wasting my life.

I was constantly worrying and in the midst of that, God taught me a lot and , and really he taught me what I'm about to share with you , uh, that I hope will encourage you, but I , I just want you to get a vision that listen, the reason you need to learn how to handle transition well is cuz if you don't, you will waste years of your life.

And I'm not saying , I'm not saying that there's not periods where you need to grieve and there's gonna be, you know, an uncomfortable week or two or month or two. But I mean, if it's been five years since a bad transition, you still can't get over it. Then there's, there's an issue there. And so I wanna spend the rest of our time, just sharing with you a few things that God really taught me , uh, in a season of an uncomfortable transition.

And again, my hope is that it'll encourage you and it'll equip you to handle uncomfortable transitions in your life. So let's go, number one is this. Sometimes God has to dry up the well and often they're not pleasant times. Now I know that sounds about a bit spiritual, but let me explain. Sometimes God has to dry up the well and often they're not pleasant times.

I got that , uh, that quote or that thought from a message that really helped me in my season of transition by a man named Carter Conlin. Who's the pastor of times square church. And it had a huge impact on me. And the scripture he used is , is found in the old Testament is in first Kings chapter 17 versus five through nine. And it says this. It says so Elijah did, as the Lord told him and camp beside the Brook east of the Jordan, the Ravens brought him bread and meat each morning and evening.

And he drank from the Brook . But after a while , the Brook dried up for there was no rainfall anywhere in the land. Then the Lord said to Elijah, go, I'm gonna read that last part portion again, but after a while , the Brook dried up for there was no rainfall anywhere in the land. And then the Lord said to Elijah, go and Carter went on to say, pastor Carter, Conlin said, sometimes they get us to move on in life. God has to dry up the well in our current seasons.

And these often aren't pleasant times, but they're necessary cuz we're all campers by nature. If it were up to us, we'd stay in the same place where we're comfortable forever. So if, if we're gonna move to where God wants us to move, sometimes he has to dry up the well and make it uncomfortable for us to, to leave. And you know, this is why I think sometimes you can , uh, be working somewhere that you absolutely love. You're so passionate about you would do anything for the place.

Uh , and then all of a sudden you find yourself being , uh, upset at the place. Uh , it doesn't feel like it used to be, and it doesn't mean that anything necessarily changed with them. But, but inside you just feel like your well is drying up. You don't have the passion that you did. You don't have the excitement you did. And sometimes I really believe that God is , is drying up the well , um, or making it uncomfortable.

So you actually move so you can do what he wants you to do in the next season. But I think where so many people get caught up is they don't think , uh, that they're supposed to leave or they they're afraid to leave. And so they just camp Henry cloud said this about campers. He said , uh, there's people that don't believe in seasons and think that this season that they're in is gonna last forever.

He said, so what I encourage you to do, don't do that believe in life cycles and seasons, cuz they are real. I always tell people all the time, enjoy where you're at, cuz you're there for a reason and for a season. And so there's something for you to learn, but don't think that you're gonna be there forever. Something that my pastor always told me that , uh, I didn't really get until I had to walk through it .

But he said never put a period where God puts a comma, never put a period where God puts a comma and all basically he was saying was never make up your mind and say like for me in my life, I thought I was gonna be a youth pastor forever. Or I thought I was gonna be a senior pastor and plan a church. And so I was like, that's it I'm gonna be a youth pastor. So if anything else opened up, I would automatically say no to it. And I would limit what God wants me to do with my life.

What if God doesn't want me to be a youth pastor? What if God doesn't want me to plan a church and I had to learn that the hard way, but I think it's just so important to realize that, just be grateful for where you're at, but realize that there's gonna be times in your life where God has to dry up the well to get you to move. And the best thing that you can do when God says to move is move.

And so some of you might be listening to this and saying, I feel like your transition's coming on, but I , how am I supposed to know in my opinion, and again, this leans more spiritual side, but it's who I am. In my opinion, you have to hear from God. Uh , the best advice I heard when I was in a tough season, an uncomfortable season of transition was this until, you know, until you know that you know that you know that it's time to go stay.

And when, you know, when you know that you know that, you know that it's time to go then go. I , I don't think it gets any clearer than that. And so for two years, I really felt like in my life , uh, the well was drying up in the season of life that I was in. And uh, but again, I, I kept feeling I'm supposed to stay. I'm supposed to stay. I'm supposed to stay, even though it was uncomfortable. And then finally the door opened up and I felt like it was the right one.

I felt like God was saying go. And so I went and um , the rest is history and I'll share a little bit about what happened , uh, in a , a little bit. But again, so if you're , you don't know what to do in the middle and you think your transition's coming one hear from God two, I encourage you to get wise counsel . You need to surround yourself by ways , uh, mentors who have tons of wisdom who can pour into your life and that know you well. And then three, just let it take time.

Um, sometimes I think we just get uncomfortable in a season and we give it a month and we say, okay, I'm outta here. And uh, and God might not be speaking to us to move on at all. And so I just encourage you, wait it out. You can always quit tomorrow, wait out another day, give it another three months. Um, but let take the time. It needs to know that you know that you know that it's time to go and until you do stay.

So number one recognize that God's gonna drive the well and often they're not pleasant times, but they're intended for you to get you to go to where God wants you to go. So don't be afraid of them. The second lesson I learned in uncomfortable transitions is this do not get better bitter about your last season. Do not get bitter about your last season. I don't care if it was a good transition or a bad transition.

It is so easy to get bitter about the last season of your life, about the people that were in the last season of your life, about the place you worked in the last season of your life, do not do it. I promise you. I promise you. I promise you it will be a waste of your time and energy. In fact, I'd argue with you. If you're still bitter, then you're not trusting that God has something better for you in the future.

If you're still bitter about the past, then you are not trusting that God has something better for you in the future. And I'll talk more about that in the lessons below , but Isaiah 26 verse three in the Bible says he will keep you in perfect peace , whose eyes are fixed on him. And I remember I was, this was about dating, but I remember talking to a pastor about a season of worry that I was in and I was bitter and all these things. And he just looked at me and he shared that verse with me .

He said, you're not trusting God. And the reality was I wasn't. I was looking at myself. I was looking at all the circumstances I'm telling you do not look at all that stuff. Just look to God, do not get bitter. And if you'll look to God and trust that he has something great planned for you in the future, he will give you peace. And there's nothing better than having peace in the midst of an uncomfortable transition.

I'm telling you, you can't do it without God do not get bitter about your last season. Number three, determine why you were in a season of transition and learn the lessons that you need to learn from it. Determine why you're in a season of transition and learn the lessons you need to learn from it.

You know, oftentimes if it's a bad transition or even if it's good , um, and, and we quit and you know, maybe we thought we were being treated poorly or maybe we did get treated poorly regardless of whether or not that is true. You have to determine in transition and really look inside to see if you were part of the problem. You have to see if you were part of the problem. I see so many people miss this and it just drives me nuts.

They point the finger at the last season of their life and the people in the last season of their life. But they never point the finger themselves and say, Hey, maybe I was a part of the problem. Maybe I didn't grow enough. Or maybe , um, I had blind spots that I didn't know about. And I wanna encourage you.

If , if you wanna grow, have the strength and courage to go to the people in the last season of your life and ask them if you were part of the problem or ask them what you could do to grow and develop so that you don't repeat the same mistake over and over again. Cuz here's what I know. We often we have blind spots that we don't know about and if we don't learn how to deal with them, they're gonna carry into the next season of our life. And here's what I know.

People might not recognize them at first, but eventually people are gonna know them. And if you don't learn to deal with them , now you're gonna have to deal with them in the next season of your life. So I encourage you finish if you're in the middle of a transition, make sure that you end the transition. Well, cuz if you don't, you're gonna end up having to learn the same lessons that you were supposed to learn in this season. Next it is just gonna drive you nuts. Henry cloud said this.

He said, when we failed to end things, well we are destined to repeat the mistakes that keep us from moving on. I love that. Learn to end things well by figuring out what lessons you need to learn from the last season of transition of your life. That's so huge. The next thing I learned in in times of uncomfortable transitions is this is you'll find the unhealthy places you were finding your value in times of uncomfortable transition.

You will find the unhealthy places you were finding your value. I I've shared this often, but when I had a big transition, mine was from a church. I worked at a big church and I didn't know it, but all of my value was in the fact that I worked at a big church. I thought I was a big deal. I thought I got opportunities because I worked at a big church and I wouldn't have said that, but I didn't realize what I thought I had until I, I didn't have it anymore.

And so I was finding all my value in this and what really happened was I had an identity crisis. I said, you know, if I'm not working at this church, then who am I, if I don't have this connection than who am I? And I , and I thought I was a nobody. And the reality was, I thought I would all , I , I thought all my opportunities were gone . I thought I would never do anything great for God again.

And I was depressed for about six months and what I really found and what God really taught me was my identity was in the wrong things. My identity was where I work and what I do when the reality is my, my identity should just be found in him and who I am and whose I am . And to trust God that he'll take care of me, Keith Moore said this, and it really helped me said, if you find your identity in anything you can lose, you're in danger of having an identity crisis.

If your identities and how good you are or how awesome you are, how connected you are or X, Y , Z , if it's in anything that you can lose, you're in danger of an identity crisis. So I encourage you do it. Now, do the hard work of, of finding your identity in Christ and finding your identity and who you are and who you are now. I, I, I'm constantly evaluating , um, where my identity is and if I'm honest, all too often , my identity still in what I do, I work at light of life rescue mission.

Now we help the homeless. And if I'm not careful, I , I can start to think all my values and that I work for the homeless and I'm doing the great work, but that's not true. My , my value is not in that. And so I just wanna encourage you to catch yourself. And would you be okay if, if this all went away, get to a place where I , I , my heart and my desires, I wanna get to a place where if I didn't work at light of life, I would be fine. If I didn't have L three leadership, I would be fine.

And that's where I want to get to in my heart. And I'm getting closer every day . I'm certainly not perfect. But , uh, the , the more you can find your identity and in Christ and who you are and who you are , uh, the less likely you are , uh, to have an identity crisis and be depressed in the middle of an uncomfortable transition, A few more lessons. The next lesson I learned is ministry, where you could say success is not a job ministry is who you are, where you are.

Again, I'll say that again, ministry is not a job ministry is who you are, where you are. This has a lot to do with the identity thing as well. Um, but for me, I really , uh, I thought that ministry was where I worked. I thought that ministry was being a part of something , um, of a church, et cetera. But what I learned is ministry is just simply who I am doing, what God calls me to do day in and day out.

And if you're not in the ministry world, if that's not the context in which you work, I would say this success in whatever your endeavor is. It's not a job. It's not something you do. Success is simply who you are, where you are everywhere you go. You can be significant if you'll just do what you're supposed to do day in and day out. And I wish I would've known that.

I wish I would've known that I didn't have to have a certain job or a title in order to feel successful, or in order to feel like I was doing ministry, that I could simply be who I am, where I am and make the difference that God intended me to make. That was huge for me. The next lesson I learned is if God's called you to do something, he's the only one that can take it away. If God's called you to do something, he's the only one that can take it away.

Again, this has everything to do with what I've been talking about, but this was another lesson I learned in that season of transition. And when I left the big church, I thought all of my opportunities in life were a result of being at that church. So I thought all my opportunities were done. I really enjoyed speaking. I enjoyed networking. I enjoyed leading. And , um, I basically thought I'd never have opportunities to do any of those things again.

Uh , but shortly after that, after the season transition, the opposite happened. I actually had more opportunities open up for me after the transition was over. And that's when I really learned that that God is my source and God can open up doors that nobody else can open. And I just needed to be faithful and trust him. God's the , the God is, is the one that can open doors. No one else can open. He's the one that can give you opportunities.

Stop looking to people, places, and things to fill that need in your life and start trusting God that if he's called you to do something that he'll make it happen. As long as you don't disqualify yourself, you, you have a part to play in that as well. You gotta do the work. You gotta show up. You have to be faithful, but if you'll do those things, God will show up every time. And he'll open up doors that you never dream possible.

When you're in a season of transition , remember that if God's called you to do something, he's the only one that can take it away. Next God is bigger than the last season of your life. God's bigger than the last season of your life. Um, sometimes, you know, when we're in the middle of a transition in our life, we don't actually believe that God can do anything greater than what he did in the last season of our life.

It's so easy use to think just what I was thinking that it'll never be as good as it once was, but I remember my father-in-law constantly encouraging me. God , Bubba , God, bub was my nickname for those you listening. But he said to me, Doug meant God is bigger than the last season of your life. God's bigger. God has bigger things for you. Bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger. And can I be honest with you for the first year? You'd said I'm like, yeah, that sounds great. Thanks Mr. Rogers.

Thanks for the great quotes, whatever , uh, cuz I didn't believe it. I didn't believe that God is bigger than the last season of my life, but can I tell you this? He is man . God's bigger. God made the universe. I mean he makes planets. So for him to do something bigger and better than the last season of your life is , is simple for him. And I just wanna encourage you. If you're going through a season of transition, trust God, that your best days are ahead of you and not behind you.

God can make your future better than your past. You have to believe that. And I'm living proof that it's possible. God's bigger than the last season of your life. Few more lessons. Next one would be, be grateful for the last season of your life and the impact it made on you. Be grateful for the last season of your life and the impact that it made on you again, regardless of how your transition happened, et cetera, be grateful for the lessons learned.

I think so many times in the middle of , uh, being uncomfortable and we can be bitter and have unforgiveness all these things that we can forget how awesome it was to work or be a part of the season that we were just in. And I think if you'll really take time and reflect and just say, you know, what did I learn in that last season? What was the best? How much did I grow? What , what happened in my life? That was awesome.

If you'll start listening to those things, I think you'll fill up pages of how awesome it was at that last season and just be grateful for it. And you know, what honor those who were in the last season of your life. If , if it was a job, if it was a person , um, if it was a family, whatever the last season of your life looked like, be grateful for it and show honor them. Write them. Thank you note saying thank you so much. That season that I spent at working at that church changed my life.

I'm so grateful that I had the opportunity to work there. In fact, everything I'm doing today is a result and , and , and really just part of what I was doing there. I learned everything I needed at that church. And so I'm so grateful for them. So I'm constantly trying to find ways to honor them and lift them up and serve their , um, et cetera . So be grateful if you find bitterness sinking in, replace it with gratitude.

Next two more lessons recognize that God wants you to get where God wants you to go more than you want to get, where God wants you to go. One of my favorite quotes of all time is by Mark Patterson , recognize that God wants you to get where God wants you to go more than you want to get, where God wants you to go. So , uh, I'll just say this, that , uh, where I worked, I work at light of life rescue now mission. Now I've been there for almost six years, which is crazy.

Um, when I left, I , I transitioned from the church that I was on staff at to help plan a church, which I , I knew I was supposed to do when I left there. Uh , I was looking for a job in the business world and in sales and marketing, I was not looking for nonprofit . I wasn't looking for ministry. The church plan couldn't pay me yet. So I said, Hey, I'll just work somewhere for a year until the church plan could pay me. So I interviewed at all these places, I had a job lined up.

They said, Hey, we can't start you until two months from now. So until then, can you get by, well, I didn't know what to do literally. And I love this about God out of nowhere, out of nowhere at seven o'clock in the morning, one morning, I got a call asking of someone, asking me to come and interview at light of life. I interviewed got the job and really the rest is history. And about a year into my, my job at light of life, I really felt like God was dealing with me to stay there.

And I've been there ever since, obviously, but looking back now, I mean, I can see it so clearly, you know, I had no idea what God wanted to do with my life, but I can see it so clearly that man, God wanted me to end up where I am today, more than I did. And he knew I would end up here, but I didn't. And he had to , he had to do so many things for me to get here. He had to dry up the well and actually get me to leave. And he had to lead me and guide me.

And out of nowhere, he opened up a door out of nowhere. And so I just wanna encourage you, you know, some , so many times the reason people get disappointed and uncomfortable seasons of transition is cuz they have these expectations of what could have been or what could be. And uh, and they think that again, if they, if , if one season ends that , that that's, there goes their opportunity, there goes their chance of ever doing anything. Great. And I'm here to tell you, it's just not true.

If you're a child of God, if you follow God, man , God will get you where he wants you to go. God will get you to that end destination. If you ever dream in your heart, I'm telling you if it's for God and you're pursuing God, he'll cause it to come to happen. But here's why I know it may not be the way you think it is. You know, I thought I was gonna be on staff for that church forever. And I don't know what would happen afterwards, but I just saw myself being there forever.

But I didn't know that God wanted to move me here and then move me there to give me these skills. And I don't know what he's preparing me for, to be honest with you , uh, that whole lesson of never putting a period where God puts a comma. That's how I live my life. Now. I just say, people always are like, Doug, where do you see yourself in five years? Where this sounds so cliche , but wherever God wants me, wherever God wants me is where I want to be.

Um, and so, and I know God will get me there. If he needs to make it uncomfortable for me to leave, man, that's gonna need to happen again. But I trust him now because I see how awesome he is. And I just wanna encourage you if you're discouraged, because you think God's plan for you is over because an uncomfortable transition, you have to believe that God wants you to get where God wants you to go more than you do.

God wants the desires of your heart, the dreams and your heart, as long as there for his glory to happen more than you do. And when you realize that you can trust him. Here's what I know about. Uh , here's what I love something that Henry cloud said in his book. He said without the ability to end things, people stay stuck, never becoming who they are meant to be never accomplishing all their talents and abilities should afford them.

Guys. I love that without the ability to end things, people stay stuck, never becoming who they were meant to be and never accomplishing their talents and abilities, what their talents and abilities should afford them. And here's what I know. If you're following God, there's more in you than you think there is. You have more gifts and talents than you think you do. And you're capable of far more than you think you are. And sometimes you'll never find that out.

If you're not willing to have necessary endings, if you're not willing to have transition in your life. So stop worrying about transition. Just let God move you and let him get you where he wants to go. I didn't know I could do fundraising. I didn't know I could do this podcast. I didn't know I could start a company, but those are all things that I did because God moved me into another season.

And so I know if God has to move me again, it's for my good it's because he wants to develop me into who I was meant to be. So let God do his work, the work that only he can do. And then lastly, I'll close with this. This is the last lesson I'll close with soon. Sorry. I'm sipping on my Starbucks ice coffee. I love, love, love Starbucks, iced coffee. Last lesson soon. It will be better than it's ever been soon. It will be better than it's ever been.

Uh , when I was in a season of uncomfortable transition, I remember there was a message I heard by Keith Moore and he was encouraging people in the beginning and he just had a , uh, a word on his heart and it was simply better than it's ever been. And he talked about it and he , he was just speaking out and he just said, you know, some of you have been down and out. Some of you have been discouraged.

Some of you when people ask you how you are, you can't even look in the eye because you're so ashamed or so upset about the season that you're in. But he said, but not . And not many days, man, people are gonna come to you and they're gonna say, Hey, how's it going? How are you? And you'll look at them with a huge smile on your face, with a gleam in your eye. And you'll smile and say, brother, it's better than it's ever been better than it's ever been. Even at its best.

It wasn't this, this good. Even at its best. The last season, wasn't as good as this season. It's better than it's ever been. And I remember when I was in a season of discouragement and almost depression, I just remember thinking that it's never, I just, people would ask me how I'm doing and I'd say, oh , you know, I'm doing okay. I mean, I just, I was not doing great. I couldn't even look people in the eye. I was ashamed. I never thought I'd do anything significant with my life.

And I heard that, that message. And it just, I said, okay, God, I'm trusting you that in a few months and a few years people were gonna say, Doug, how's it going? I'm gonna say it's better than it's ever been. It's better than it's ever been. And even at his best, my life has never been this good. And can I tell you something it's been five years now in life is better than it's ever been.

And I'm so grateful that God taught me how to transition well, and whether it was a good transition, whether it's an uncomfortable transition, whether it was a transition by my choice or whether it was a transition by someone else's choice, God has taught me the value of transitioning. Well, and I wanna encourage you.

I hope this, this podcast encourages you to transition well, whether you're in a season of transition, feel like one's coming or when one does come, I encourage you to go back and listen to this, cuz God wants you to handle transition in a healthy way and listen, life's better than it's ever been right now in my life. But here's what I know. God could have another transition for me coming up in the next few months.

That may be difficult for me, but because I've learned these lessons because God's been faithful in the past and helped me transition. Well, I know he will be faithful in the future too, as well. So hope this encouraged you. Thanks for listening. I can't wait to talk to you next episode and have a great day. Well, Hey leader , thank you so much for listening to my lesson on how to handle transitions in your life. I hope that it added value to your life.

You can find links to everything that I discussed in the lesson, in our show notes@lthreeleadership.org slash 3 31 and leaders always, I wanna challenge you that if you wanna 10 X your growth this year, then you need to either launch or join in L three leadership mastermind group. Mastermind groups have been the greatest source of growth in my life over the last seven years.

And if you dunno what they are, they're just simply groups of six to 12 leaders that meet together on a consistent basis for at least one year in order to help each other grow, hold each other accountable and to do life together. So if you're interested in learning more about launching or joining a group, go to L three leadership.org/masterminds, well leader, thank you so much for listening to this episode, my wife, Laura , and I love you. We believe in you and we say it all the time.

Don't quit. Keep leading the world desperately needs your leadership. We'll talk to you next episode.