A Solo Check-In: Life, Work, and What’s Next

I have this incredible therapist who I do sessions with every other week. He's a big believer in just going super deep so that you have some time to sort of settle with whatever came up for you in your session. And one of the tools that he passed along to me to do in the in between is something that he called Pew 12, which is purged emotional writing for twelve minutes. So essentially, you're gonna sit down with a pen and paper and you're just gonna write for twelve minutes of whatever needs to come out of you. It's sort of like just getting your subconscious thoughts out of your body and onto the paper.

Honest to God, mine is illegible. Like you cannot see what I'm even writing if you went back to look at it, which you're not supposed to by the way. This is meant to just come out of you, don't reread it, don't think about it, and just get it out of your system. It has been one of the most helpful tools for me as I'm navigating a tricky situation in my personal life. It's just letting me release some of that energy.

So then when you're done, you just set an alarm on your phone twelve minutes. If you feel like you need to go longer, go for it. And at the end of that twelve minutes, you're gonna burn the paper. If you can't burn it, I don't know, shred it, rip it up, throw it away. Don't let anyone find it.

I had a girlfriend do this and forgot the important destroying it, and her her man found it. So maybe get rid of it. But there is something about the process of burning it and letting it go. It's very cathartic. It feels really, really good.

I obviously know not everyone has like the ability to burn something, but I'm a little scared of fire these days, I've actually been shredding it, which works. So it's really just about releasing anything that you need to get out of your system. And then following that, I'm not a great meditator. And so I go on Gabby Bernstein's app and she actually has guided meditations on her app that have all kinds of different topics. So anything that you're going through, basically, you can find a meditation to help you through it.

And so I just go through and I pick a different one pretty much every day. It's so helpful. Bonus points if you can do this in the sunshine, there's something really healing about vitamin d. It's still really warm in LA, so I've been able to do it outside. It's just a really nice time for myself.

It's pouring into myself, which I think is really, really important. And so if you're struggling with something, also I like to do this when I'm looking for the answer. Like when I can't figure out what to do about a situation, I'm gonna write about it and eventually the clarity will come. So I hope this is a helpful tool to you guys. I did not invent this.

Lots of people suggest, you know, version of this sort of journal writing, but I found it to be really helpful. And then also if possible going on a short little mental health walk is also great. I find nature to be so healing and a great time to really just put my phone down and be more present and sort of take the dogs for a walk and just, you know, get outside. It's the little things and it's all free, which is so great. Well, Gabby's app is not free, but it's worth it.

Okay. So you guys are always asking me what my favorite brands are, and I wanted to dig into a few. I wrote a list for you because I don't wanna mess this up and give you a few that I feel like aren't as well known. One of my favorite leather brands is called Leo Season. I recently wore a sort of camel color leather trench coat.

I posted it on my Instagram. We'll pop the picture up for you guys to see right here. And everyone's asking me about this brand. I know about them because they're at a showroom here in LA. I don't believe they're selling anywhere locally, but you can find them online.

But definitely one of my favorite leather jackets. It's honestly as good as the Saint Laurent leather in the shapes and in the fabrics. You heard it here first. Okay. Some of my favorite brands on Revolve are Eves, e a v e s, and then Girlfriend.

I'm wearing this little Girlfriend sort of layered long sleeve t shirt situation right now. I know that Revolve can be really overwhelming and there's so many brands on there. I personally always go through and I'm constantly updating my faves, so you guys can shop those and not have to search through the whole app and you can sort of see my personal curated collection on Revolve. But two of my favorite brands on there are Girlfriend and Eve's. Obviously, we love Helsa, but that one's not a secret.

I feel like everyone's kind of onto them. And then I think there's some really good pieces in Sofia Richie's collection SRG Atelier. I recently joined a new app called Grandest, and on that app, I did a video about some of my favorite belt brands and why I love them. But one of my all time favorites is called Dehange. I think they have really amazing, well priced, great quality belts.

It's one of my go tos. I personally like to use belts as an accessory as like a part of your outfit. It shouldn't be an afterthought if you're a girl. It should be tying your jewelry together, it should be the same hardware, it should be making a statement not every time obviously, but a belt is a really really great way to elevate your look, to really tie together your accessories and to take your look to the next level. Regarding splurging on certain items, I personally feel strongly that splurging on a bag, a shoe, and a coat are probably the best places to put your money, especially if they're classic pieces that can take you season after season.

For instance, I was willing to spend on the Row Margo bag because I knew that I would wanna carry that bag for the rest of my life. There was no way that that bag was gonna go out out. It's a beautiful classic piece. I feel the same way about shoes. I think that there's obviously trendy pieces that come out, but I think finding the ones like the Kate Nevada boot is a great boot that is gonna take you for the rest of your life.

They do make them in new color ways every season or with a new print. So that's like a fun way to add a statement piece into your closet, but getting them in basic colors are gonna take you a really, really long way. Okay. Someone asked about any current events that I'm loving. I am such a wicked girly, and I'm so excited to be seeing all of Ariana Grande's looks, and I'm so excited that she's back working with La Roche, one of the most incredible stylists in the world, and he is so dedicated to finding vintage gowns.

And it's such a pleasure to watch what they've curated for this, you know, tour, for this wicked promo tour on the second movie. Some of these gowns are as old as like the nineteen forties and the nineteen fifties, and seeing her reimagine them is really, really fun for me. And I just appreciate the work that goes into trying to source these pieces. I know how hard it is. I know that it makes the looks that more special, and you can really tell that they're having fun together.

So I've really been enjoying seeing this press tour. Someone asked about a capsule wardrobe mindset. And, you know, I've talked a lot about this since the fire. I think I was mostly focused on building a capsule wardrobe. Obviously, I had nothing.

So starting with, like, crazy over the top trendy pieces wasn't gonna make sense. And so I really focused on finding things that I could mix and match together to create a cohesive wardrobe starting with basics, starting with great, you know, vintage Levi's that I can wear a million different ways. I got, you know, a great pair of black pants, a great suit, some great basics, some sweaters, some jackets. And then I think from there, you're you know, for me, I was in a good place of having sort of a a well rounded basic wardrobe. And then from there, I was able to add in the more, you know, star of the show pieces, the investment pieces, the things that feel either a little bit more trendy or even vintage was a huge, you know, about nine months after the fire, I was able to start shopping vintage and finding really unique pieces, which I think is a great tip if you're looking to stand apart from everyone else.

Finding vintage is such a great way to incorporate things into your wardrobe that are gonna make you feel a little bit more unique, a little bit more different, but still being true to yourself. I personally, like, I love a snatched waist when I'm trying to get dressed at night, more for night, obviously not. My day to day life, but finding vintage Mugler, that silhouette is what I'm happiest in and feel most confident in. So if that's what it is for you, get lots of that. If it's, you know, you're a Ralph Lauren girl, get lots of Ralph Lauren.

I think that finding the brands that really work for you and then searching those keywords when you're shopping on eBay or wherever it is that you look for these things is a lot of fun. If you don't know what a capsule wardrobe means or what that really entails, it's about finding, let's say, five items that are classic items that you can mix and match different ways. So some great pants, simple tops, a great jacket, a leather jacket, maybe a little black dress. These are pieces that you can go back to over and over and over again and wear different ways if you style it differently. Meaning, you might wanna wear that black leather, you know, you might wanna wear this black dress with boots one day, but then the next day you're gonna wear it with loafers.

It's a piece that can take you multiple different places and style it in different ways, and it's gonna give you a different vibe, I guess. And also being able to mix and match the pieces in your closet to create your vibe, I guess, would be the best way to explain it. You guys are always asking me about working with proportions and wearing things oversized and how do I do that to not look completely crazy or just like I'm drowning in my clothes. I think a great tip for that is for example, I'm kind of wearing something right now that's pretty oversized and I tucked it into the side of my jeans just so that, obviously, you can't see it right now. But when I'm standing up, that there's some definition of my shape here as opposed to just letting it hang down.

I think it's also important to if you're wearing something super baggy on top, you want something a little bit more slim on the bottom or vice versa. Obviously, there's looks that feel really cool, really oversized, and that's not for everyone. It is for me, but it's not for everyone. But I think learning how to dress for your personal shape and body type is really important and it's something that you can do at home on your own in your closet. Obviously, you can go in and try different things and try to figure out what feels right for you.

If there's something that you wanna try that you've seen your favorite influencer celebrity wear, go home and try it. You know, play in your closet and try these different silhouettes on your personal shape. Or if you can look at someone and say, oh, she and I have the same sort of body type. I'm gonna recreate her look. I think that's really helpful.

I love to pre style looks especially when I have events coming up or I know I have a busy week ahead. Sometimes I'll go into my closet and just prestyle things. I also just did a fun series on my TikTok and my Instagram. You can see it with my assistant, Rachel. She came in and styled a bunch of looks for me.

I I think I've talked about this on the pod, but having a friend come in with a fresh set of eyes to help you put outfits together can be a really fun way to reuse pieces in your closet that you've either forgotten about or just have sort of taken for granted. I don't think we always need to be shopping and consuming. We can just have your most stylish friend come over and help you put looks together. It's really fun if you just let them go crazy and literally leave the room and see what they come up with. It's kind of like having your own personal stylist.

I think by mixing highs and lows, it can really create like a contrast of a really cool curated look. I definitely think that also mixing vintage into that is cool as well, and you can find amazing vintage pieces for, you know, fraction of what you'd find in a retail store. Okay. Everyone is always asking me about tailoring. And I think that tailoring as a stylist is one of the most important things you can do for your outfit, especially if you have a body type that needs, I'll speak for myself.

I have a bigger butt and a smaller waist and so pants never fit me, right? Unless I wear them super low waisted. I need a bigger size to fit my lower body, but then it's too big on my waist. And so a simple alteration at the waist is really the best way to get a great fit. I also do the same with denim.

I I know that might sound like, oh, babe, I can't tailor all my clothes. But really, if you find someone good at your local dry cleaner, I promise you, you can make your clothes fit better. I think it's also for me too, I fluctuate a lot. My weight goes up and down. Like, I have this weird five to ten pound range.

So I have pieces that fit me at my littlest, and then I have pieces that fit me at my biggest, and it's kind of nice. And then I have that sort of range in my closet. But I just I can't emphasize enough. Every single look you see on every celebrity on every red carpet has been tailored to perfection. These clothes do not show up fitting perfectly.

Sometimes every now and then 5% that there's nothing that needs to be done, but I would guarantee you every look that you guys are seeing has been tailored. So I highly suggest to figure out a way to make it work as well in your closet. Someone said, what are some trends that you're hating right now? You guys, the wedge Isabel Marant sneaker that's coming back that I wore at high in high school or I think I was a freshman in college. No.

I cannot. I cannot get back into it. I'm sorry. It's definitely hit my 18 year old goddaughter asked me about them. I just I can't believe that they're coming back. I also this is really controversial, and people are gonna be so mad at me for saying this, but I really hate boots and jeans. Like, I a boot over the jeans. Like, the jeans, like, stuffed into a boot. I hate that. I don't know.

It's just giving $20.25, like I mean, not $20.25. It's giving 2,005. I don't know. I just it's not for me either, but I know that's a controversial take on that. I have a crazy story from when I was an assistant in New York. I feel like this probably wouldn't happen now, but years ago, I mean, this had to be I don't know. I was probably 19. I had a shoot scheduled. It was the winter, and all the clothes were at my apartment. And there was a crazy blizzard, and they didn't cancel the shoot.

And I could not get this was before Uber, so I'm really freaking dating myself. And the subways were closed, and I couldn't get a taxi, and I literally had to drag these two body bag size duffle bags from my apartment in Soho to Milk Studios on, like, I think it was 14th Street or 20th. I mean, was an absurd walk. And I had these two huge duffle bags and I'm literally trudging through the snow. People were looking at me like I was absolutely out of my mind, but they didn't cancel the shoot.

I had no other way to get there, and I had all the clothes. So when you guys talk about not wanting to work hard, I don't know. It's just hard for me to understand. Someone asked what one of my favorite dresses ever was, and it was definitely Megan Fox in the see through Mugler dress for the VMAs. We can insert the picture so you guys can see it.

But the crazy story about this dress is we had it for six months before the VMAs, and honestly, not a lot of clients for whatever reason, people sometimes just wanna see new, like, over and over and over again as opposed to, oh, that's the dress for six months from now. But Megan was very good at knowing what I had pulled it for wasn't the right event. And she said to me, I think we should save it and wear it to the VMAs. And she was a 100% right. So we had it literally sitting right here for six months, and I begged the brand.

Most brands don't let you do that. But I begged the brand and Casey, the designer at the time, and I said, I promise you she's gonna wear it. And it took us forever to figure out what the undergarment was gonna be because it was so naked and see through. And somewhere in between us trying the dress on and the event, she did a CR magazine shoot in a similar version of the dress in a darker color. And that stylist had a pair of, like, crystal panties on set, which was from a brand called Weiderhoft.

And we were trying to figure out, like, what are these underwear? They're as crystally as the dress was. And the hairstylist that was on the shoot directed us to wear these underwear were I mean, it's so stupid, you guys. I know it sounds crazy, but it really mattered because it created sort of this, like, viral, like, crystal panty situation underneath. So the magazine ended up coming out before the VMAs, which was a little annoying to me because she wore a pretty similar dress, but editorial and red carpet are two totally different things.

And wearing something in real life that is literally completely naked see through is different than shooting it in a magazine, and it was in a darker color. So a lot of people were online saying that I copied that stylist, which, of course, I didn't. We had the dress for months before the event actually happened. And, I mean, I'm surprised she didn't chicken out. It was definitely a crazy moment.

I feel like it's a bit iconic. I think it kind of gives, like, almost like early February energy of these girls who were just unapologetic, like, very Courtney Love, you know, just very badass and cool, and I don't care what anyone thinks. I don't think anyone else could have worn that dress the way that she did. It was so sick. It was definitely one of my favorite moments ever.

So one of the girls in the office is asking, have I ever put someone in something that I didn't like what they liked and I just had to go with it because we didn't have enough time to change it? The answer is no because I would never I would never do that. However, there have been times where I feel strongly it's the wrong look, but the client chose the one that they wanted to wear. And I was vocal about this is not the look that I think is the right look. But at the end of the day, it's their choice.

And so they get to obviously pick what they wear. But certainly, clients have picked things that I didn't 100% love, but not because I didn't wanna fix it or change it, but more because it's what they liked. So at that point, you know, it kind of is what it is. I work for them at the end of the day. Okay, you guys.

This was very fun as always. Let me know if you have any other questions for future episodes. Drop it in the comments or send us a DM on our TikTok account. And as always, I love you, and I'll see you on the next one.