Hi, everyone. Today's show is a special 1. Not only does it highlight some of the episodes from this past season. It's also a fun and lively conversation between myself, Drew and liz. In which we get to share our love for this work. Our fascination and amazement of these beautiful people who are the Hoffman graduates. And really, it's an acknowledgement of just how much the 3 of us feel like the luck people on earth because this is the work we get to do in the world.
So my friends enjoy this compilation of a handful of season 5 episodes. Thank you for tuning in and listening, and we will see you again. In season 6. Welcome to Loves everyday radius. A podcast brought to you can by the Hoffman Institute. My name is Drew Horn. My name is Sharon Moore. My name is Liz Sever and on this podcast. We engage in conversation and learn from Hoffman Graduates.
And have a conversation with them about how their work in the process is informing their life outside of the process. So tune in and listen in and hear how our graduates authentic selves, how their love, how their spirits are making a positive impact on our world today. In other words, get to know. Their loves, everyday radius. Here we are talking about a taste of 20 22, Liz Sharon how you guys doing? Happy to be here. Yeah. Very excited to be exploring all of our our past season together.
Some 45 episodes over the course of this past year, season 4 and season 5. And the 3 of us get together and reflect a little bit on some of the highlights, some of the wonderful moments of having conversations with Hoffman graduates. What's it like You guys to have to have been a host over these past year. A hell
of the year, it's been. For me, this is every season, and every conversation is a reminder person by person, conversation by conversation of how unique and powerful this work is in a way by featuring their stories by shining a light on them I get rein and I get reconnected to this work every single time. I couldn't have
said it better myself. The thing I love the most is just that being able to sit down and hear someone's story and how the process has changed them how it continues to ripple out into their lives, but it brings me back to teaching and those moments when you just know in the process that the work is working that they are learning that they are softening, opening up, and it just reminds me of the power of this work.
Yeah. In this first take, we're gonna hear from amanda, a, a woman who has a network of people that follow her, lots of broadcast media outlets that she's formed over the years. She's interviewed wonderful people, and she asked us. If we would be willing to interview her. We we were like, of course. But, you know, the pandemic has been tough on mental health. And I'm inspired in this moment to feature vulnerability just because it feels like the more we pretend
the worse it's gonna get. And 1 of the great things about sitting down with guests is that most of it is not planned. We're not quite sure what's gonna happen when we talk about their experience.
In the process and outside the process. And that was no more true than with Amanda when she was wholly in her day, and her day was not going well, and she acknowledged how emotional she was because of what was happening in her day, and because of talking about the process, hear amanda to cad in this moment. It was like things came into focus in a way that they hadn't before. It was like a little pot in my hot. You know, I'm super emotional today.
And I have to say that talking about the process, which is 1 of the most powerful experiences of my life connects me to how I feel. And so inevitably, when I talk about the process, you know, I have feelings that come up because it was so profound. And it helped me to access parts of myself that I don't think I had really embraced and paid attention to my entire life. That was profound. It allowed me to really look at my childhood with a lens of compassion and forgiveness, sorry.
Wow. I love how she kinda reconnect to the fact that as she was in the process, she was connected to parts of herself she had not paid attention to her entire life. Wow. And here now she's able to access it in a matter of seconds. Yeah. That's well at, Sharon. I was just touched by the Ron, the real of that and allowing herself to re experience them, just opening up to you, but also opening up to herself And as she said things came into focus. I just I loved that.
Yeah. Yeah. And then her tears, was just so honest and real. And I guess, even integrity. She's in integrity. She's feeling it. She's showing it. This next clip is Somebody many who I met years ago at at the q 2. Her name is Ariel Dia. And I was lucky enough to be able to host her on our podcast as well. She is courageous and powerful and generous and doing so much good in this world, let's go ahead and listen
to the clip. My whole you know, message to myself was to continue making the voice of my spirit, the loudest voice that I heard in that process. I think that as queer people or as Lgbtq people, we often have a tendency to, like, be really hard on ourselves during the process of coming out or transitioning or or understanding ourself. And I think that that journey is just hard enough as it is, and to be our own worst enemy only makes it harder.
So Hoffman really just helped me become my own best friend through that journey. And to take my hand and say, we're gonna do this together. We're not we're not gonna be enemies in this journey. Have of fellow Lgbtq person, I personally profoundly relate to what she's talking about. What's amazing with Ariel is she started her journey and her moment of taking her own hand and becoming her own best friend and not being her enemy was done in a young age.
I spent decades before I learned to be able to hold my own hand specifically around this journey of coming out. So I am so deeply inspired by her courage and her ability to become her own best friend specifically in this journey. I'm curious how it landed for you, Drew hearing her her experience. When she said coming out is hard enough. And when she said I will not be my own enemy.
There's a claiming that she's making that is not coming just from her intellect, that self compassion that she referenced. It felt so embodied like she's fierce self compassion. She's taking a stand for herself with love. That's pretty cool. Yeah. And anybody who's interested in listening the whole journey, the amazing... Sorry, The whole episode. The amazing thing is her intention when she went to the AQ2 or the process. I can't remember which 1 was to continue to stay in the closet.
No way. Yes. A And as she did it at the end, she decided to completely go the other way and come out of closet and begin her journey of of coming out. It's it's really a beautiful story. What, just makes me reminds me, I should say, of the power of spirit. And as she said, you know, the commitment to make spirit the loudest voice, And it's just a reminder I think for all of us. How can we, bring that forward and make spirit our loudest internal voice.
Yeah, Liz, I I hear you. And, you know, I've gone to workshops and seminars and 1 of the most powerful presenters that I saw was not a member of the Lgbtq community but talked about how we all have our own version of what's in the closet, of coming out of the soda... Of the so called closet, it doesn't always have to be around our sexuality. So I I think it's applicable to everybody. So on this next clip, Monique Pet, talks about,
you know, I... At it's interesting spirit, and then also the emotional child. And so much of as you mentioned, liz so much of a student's work is connecting to the light and spirit, and so much of their work is connecting reclaiming their emotional child. And Monique Pet in this clip talks about how she really melted into her emotional child and reclaimed her, and she even gets a little emotional and she references what it was like to reconnect with that little girl. Eventually over a few hours.
I felt her melt into me, and I felt that hurt scared, terrified, 3 and a half year old that was so fun and playful and and curious and who had lost her own self who he'd hidden. I just eventually felt her melt to me, and I've never lost her. And I'm gonna start crying. But to me, it was such a pointed part. Of my journey because I didn't know if she even existed. I had cut her out who I am today and or who I was before.
And now I got her back, and I've got that curious little playful fun, loving kind soul, but I hidden so long and that all the trauma had kind of covered up. That was the part of my process Thanks for that clip drew. What stands out to me, and I hear it echoed and so many people but especially in her was the sentiment of noticing a part of herself that she had cut out, pushed away, you know, shut off from or shut down
to even. And it again, just brings up the question of, we all have parts of us that we've cut out or shut down, but to really go into the journey of re question claiming them and bringing them back is so powerful, and I I hear at time and time again happening in the process. Yeah. That's great. She was So nervous for the interview. And then once we started talking, it
just all kind of came forth. I loved that moment the melting in, you know, this idea of just blending with that little girl who had been cut out for so long. Yeah. I was struck by that same thing liz and what comes to mind for me is
how much of our work? In the process and after is about integration, finding these lost parts in ourselves, claiming them letting them back into our whole being and then starting to integrate and showing up into the world as an integrated whole part of ourselves So powerful. So next up, we have Ann hoc who is an absolute delight and Drew actually knows... From years ago when he lived in Bali briefly, but she is a power all and
of herself. And she in this next clip talks about just the common humanity and shared experience of of group work with Hoffman. So listen up. And I wanna really honor the Hoffman process. I'll try not to tier up with this. I really wanna honor the hoffman process. I caught myself the other day. It was a casual dinner party, but someone was suffering, and I was sitting next to that person and they were talking about, you know, what
do you offer with you healing. And I said, I went to the hoffman process and explained, blah blah about that. I think get into that warrant. But I said what I came out of the hop and process with was non judgment that I walked into a room with people that I thought were better than me, looked more put together than me. Only to realize over the course of the of the course and getting to know each other that we we all share the common human bond
of the buddhist version of suffering. By the end of that week, I would have given anyone in that room kidney. Anyone. I couldn't find judgment in me anymore for the experiences that they were brave enough to bring and share, and that has lasted in me since then. Oh, I love her storytelling. III literally felt like I was there at that dinner party. And I also felt like I was reliving my own personal experience of what was it like to sit in that room day 1.
What patterns came up for me, day 1 sitting in that room at the process? And then how did I feel day 7? It was such a beautiful way to bring me into that dinner table and really relate to her experience. I so grief sharon, and it reminds me why we help students stay focused on their own work. Because your heart is open, and all these heart's opening together that, of course, you're gonna look outward and see these beautiful souls.
The idea of giving a kidney is quite an example of a heart opening experience. I just love the the reminder of even that day 1. You know, and she's up and she's like, I I'd I came in and I saw people that looked different than me and, you know, had all these assumptions about what the week is gonna hold
and what people were gonna bring. But this ending overwhelming sense of walking out without judgment because people had brought forth their truth their stories in this vulnerable way, and it just is such a reminder for myself of the power of of healing in a group. Well, because we we live in a world with others. And I think it's so important to heal in community and then go back into the world in community as well.
Yeah. You know, I do think the work could be done individually, but it wouldn't be as effective, it wouldn't be as powerful. So this next clip is an episode I recorded with an amazing man named Ken. And I... I'm not gonna take up too many words. I'd love for you to just listen to this clip because he's so passionate. And so able to paint the picture of what he experienced and the healing he had and what he has done in the world as a result. So let's just go ahead and hear the
clip. And in the middle of my process, I was railing. I decided I was gonna spit in the face of God. How dare god take my daughter. My daughter died on his watch or her watch, and I expressed several hours till I had no voice left. And the last thing that I raged at God was Let's kill 1 of your children and see how you like it. And as soon as I said that. I could visualize. I could imagine a tear in the eye of god. I had vent every ounce of my rage of my helpless. Of my anger.
And for the first time in my life, I could see that God was not the puppet here that I had constructed him to be. Wow. I'm not sure what to say. And just sitting with what he just said. And I'm reminded of how experiences is in the process, help us heal. And that by thinking about it, it actually doesn't create change He mentions the God I had constructed in my mind was not the God that was showing up in that moment. With that tear. Yeah. That was a minute out of that episode.
It's it's beautiful, how he shares and opens up, and I too, Drew was moved by how he paints that picture of I I was railing. I spit in the face of god. I got out every ounce of my rage and helpless, and I can just relate to that, what's that feeling, whether you've experienced that on a smaller scale or to the scale that he's talking about, after you express, what are you left with?
And it was beautiful to Hear his experience and it reminded me of how many times I'm witness to other people having that experience once they express. So listening to that, I just... I got full body goosebumps because you can just hear in his voice, the passion and the power and almost going back. To that moment and recognizing that, yes, these moments as we've all just mentioned heal, and there's learning, but also just how life shifts after. If there's no
going back. That image forever changed him forever moved him and life will be different. Also that He got some power back. Right? He named a powerless that he felt. And once he stopped blaming, God or whoever else was on his list of people to blame. He got his power back. Sure. He's a grief specialist. He talks about we don't live in a grief literate world at another point in the podcast. And so I'm imagining That's his whole endeavor in life is to help us understand grief.
That and then some, and all based on not just his knowledge because he's a very knowledge whole human being who has contributed in profound ways, but also his own personal experience of real loss, whole ian salvage is next on our shorts tier where he talks about. He was 1 of the hardest guests to get on the podcast. He just didn't wanna do it, and I knew he'd be so good. We all knew he'd be good.
But he kept saying no And for some reason, I kept asking, and he explains here why he said no, and eventually why he said yes. I came back to you again and said, would you reconsider after your first couple of nose. And what did you say? Because I thought it was it was quite profound. Yeah. I was so thankful for the experience, because you asked me to be on the podcast. And my first thought was... Oh, wait. I haven't made it yet. I haven't healed. I haven't gotten there. I'm not enlightened.
It was this idea that my story had to be complete that I had to have fully healed myself and, like, been in this place. And it was such a good lesson for me because I'm I'm now realizing, oh, it's it's in the journey. It's in the story that we help motivate people. Know, it's in our vulnerability vulnerability. That we inspire.
And it was such a good lesson. I was also so grateful that you asked me and I said, no for so long and so I asked myself, why am I saying, no. And I had this idea that I had to... I had to have it all figured out, and that's just... That's so not true, And I don't think, you know, that's how people get inspired. Oh, how I love to hear from ian and I love Ian, but I can really relate. To the sentiment of, you know, I've not complete where
I have to get to accomplish. There's certain something before and it's I appreciate the honesty in that because it is just such a reminder that as you said, it's giving ourselves permission. To be where we are on the journey, and that is not an endpoint. It is a journey, and that it is in our vulnerability that we learned that we share that we inspire, and I just... I could not echo more of his sentiment. And what he said there. And. And I think it's a unique situation being a hoffman teacher.
This is a good practice for Hoffman teachers to remember. Just because we happen to be the ones who are delivering what's on that piece of paper or the curriculum or holding spaces as people are going through the journey. We too are still on our own journeys. This striving for some version of completion or perfection doesn't exist. And I think he's exactly right. The more we show our version of our journeys, our vulnerabilities, our fears, etcetera. The deeper of an impact we'll have.
So we're going to listen to a clip from my episode with Jeff Snip, what a fascinating human being and what a journey he's been on. Let's listen to his clip about his relationship, to being a high achieve to his identity to the concept of even having a goal. My mind was so hungry for all these spiritual concepts. And the more and more I
read the more spiritual concepts I had. You know, I had an identity that was really well constructed around, you know, my sense of separate self or false self or, you know, who am I in the world, and it had a lot of beliefs that were really woven it pretty tightly. You know, you have to find a way to grab 1 of those threads and just gently pull until they're not comes un undone. And even, you know, this this core belief of while the way
things happen is you have a goal. And even if your goal is to be a away it or to be enlightened or to be spiritually present. The goal itself becomes something that your belief system there wants to figure out how to achieve and really understanding that, well, that belief of the only way you get there is by Having a goal. You know, I kinda had to d that core belief which is you can't even have that goal because that kept me attached to the achievement
addiction. To really d the identity and let go and try and be present you have to be willing to kill some sacred cows and let go of beliefs that have made you wish you thought who you were. Wow. To I mean, there are so many people who come to the process who are high achieve, as you said, as he said, and who set goals and achieve those goals over and over again throughout their lives and yet. It's not enough. They're still unhappy. And what did... He called it an achievement addiction?
How many men face this, and I love his d sacred cows. He sounds like he really dug into the to the work of the process. I also deeply respect. He said kind of you find this thread and you pull it till the knot becomes undone and and what a beautiful example of him doing that? He went as far as looking at the goal and d that. And that reminds me of kind of left road right road.
Or even dark side, we can be high achieve, but if it comes from this place of our dark side, that's different than if it comes from this place of our true essence in our our spirit.
I was struck by just the honesty of you know, wanting to read books and the self help book and more and more and more right all related to this achievement, addiction to achieving, And it just reminds me of how often so many of us fall into that, of the next book, the next thing, but the reminder and in that is to really let go of the attachment to the goal, and this had... If this happened, then I will be. Right? But to bringing up b do have for me in
the process. But reminding to really leave all of that behind, Let go of the goals and just focus on what is that 1 thread I can follow and what's there for me to learn? And I would also strongly recommend listening to the episode because It's not that as he un undo this relationship to goals, let's say, He suddenly is not a contributing member of our society. Quite the opposite. He's an incredibly
contributing member of our society. What he ended up doing and focusing his attention on is cr impactful specifically with youth and educators, but it came from a different place. It came from his spirit, and he's able to be in it rather than achieve, achieve achieve. Really, really beautiful. And taking us to our next. Episode, Ryan Miles was a guest I had early in season 5. And he Wow. It his was just a beautiful episode
all around. But towards the end of the episode, he talks about life after the process and how he... Went to connect with his parents. And he shares what that experience was like for him and I'll just say this This was not something that he might have done about forgiveness and loving his parents heath. Wouldn't have necessarily done that prior to the process. So listen here as he talks about heading with his family to his parents house. Post process.
We recently just came from visiting my parents, and, just being able to tell them I love them. I was pretty powerful. And actually, mean it instead of saying it out of duty so that, you know, they didn't feel bad, but just mean it, From the bottom of my soul. I love you. Yeah. It's wonderful. Ryan, how do you feel as you talk about forgiving your parents. I feel incredibly happy. Even though if they're still pain there because haven't forgotten.
I just have no an toward them and that was a gigantic step. It was so beautiful to just hold them and say, I love you. I love you. Thank you. And That's that's a pretty huge gift. Wow, he just embodied 1 of my favorite outcomes of this process. And it is exactly that experience that he had.
I'm getting teary just thinking about it after all that we go through and all the lack of connection that we find ourselves in with our parents to be able to come to them and just hold them and feel from really the deepest place in our hearts and then share with them our love. I think it is 1 of the most powerful gifts of our process. And how beautiful that he's able to hold
both. Yes. There's still pain there. I have not forgotten but I have forgiven and I have a clear and clean connection of love towards you, my parents, Wow. Absolutely. And I love that you just reminded me of that word embodiment. When I heard him say the word love, I felt it. And it it was just a beautiful reminder of the power of the process and personally for me,
helped redefine what that word meant. What it meant towards loving myself, and what it meant to love others I could feel it when he said it. Yeah. When we title the podcast loves everyday radius, this is what we're talking about. Graduates leaving the process, gathering their family up and spreading love to those in their radius, their circle and expanding that circle over and over again in the days, weeks, months and years following their week at hoffman. This next clip is from
a dear friend of mine. Katie. And this episode is powerful as she reveals the struggles of her own sobriety and just the journey that that in an abbott self brought to her, but most importantly, she shares with us in this clip about how her mother's own struggles her mother's alcoholism, how that played a part in her own recovery and how it was hard, to really recognize that our mom was a person also struggling.
1 of the things that Struggling with most with my mom's alcoholism at the time was that it almost felt like she was doing it to me. For someone who they themselves has directly gone through the hold that alcoholism has on you and I, you know, had worked with many, many people trying to get sober, I have so much compassion for those other people, but it was my mom, it was completely different, and I just was filled with
anger and resentment. Yeah. Was... Particularly challenging to show up for her because of that, you know, how dare you do this to me, even though I know myself intellectually that, you know, Alcoholism. Is so much more than that, and it's actually very complicated, you know, part of the process where I really got to explore what my mom's life may have been, like in her past. You know, long before I ever came into her world or into bell world at all. So that was pretty
monumental for me. Just understanding, like, She had a whole life before I ever existed and understanding a little bit more about her past and her parents. What a genuine way to really exhibit? Self understanding just in how she tells that story. This is a person who's looked in inward. This is a person who's done her work, This is a person who can say out loud. I know about addiction. I know I've talked to so many people and yet what it felt like to me was how could
you do this? To me. I just am moved by how clear she was at making that discernment when it came to her mom. Ai yeah. I agree Sharon. 1 of the things that came up for me. I'm chuck because I'm like, why did I go here? But we we do some... Expressive and cath work at the beginning of the process. And it's a very powerful and yet difficult thing, to take a stand for yourself against your parents.
And when students get that they're doing it to break out to individually to separate from their parents, then things become really powerful when they become super powerful is when they have the next part of the process, which is to walk in the shoes of their parents. And when she said, I didn't even realize my mom at a whole life before I was born. You had a sense that she understood her mom's alcoholism. In a much different way.
Friends, this next clip is a very very special 1 because it is our beloved. Liz Sever who was here with us, 1 of the hosts, and I was lucky enough to have her be my guest on an episode. In this clip that you're about to hear is so powerful and so vulnerable and so relatable. I can't wait for you to hear it. Let's go ahead and take a listen. I remember a visualization and getting a really distinct vivid image of my younger self, sitting inside of a house that was on fire. So
I'm in this burning building. And people are outside of the building. I, myself as my spiritual self and adult self are also outside of this. And I just remember my younger it says self saying, no. It's too dangerous. Go on. Don't worry about me. You know, people were trying to kind of come in and rescue, and I just had this sense of self This is what I've been doing, my whole life. I've been pushing people away. I've been creating walls and barricades to... Kinda keep myself safe.
Right? But yet here the buildings on fire. I'm I'm not safe. And I I just was overcome with a sense of I have to go safe myself. This beautiful, wonderful, innocent child of mine, I have to go and be with her. And that was terrifying, but so necessary. Well, you guys caught me by surprise. But by playing that 1 in selecting that clip. But as I hear it back, and I haven't listened to it in a long time. I'm I'm brought back to that same visualization,
and it it does. It touches into this emotional place for me because it is also something that I remind students of all the time that this process well it's a week, There will be moments that you will return to time and time again years later, decades later. That will drop you right back into that place into that space into that feeling. And for me, that is part of the process that is the part in my process that I returned to so often, and I fight for that little girl daily.
So thank you for for picking That. And for catching me off guard at the same time. Sharon. What was that conversation like for you to interview another teacher? Well, I love interviewing teachers because I find us to be fascinating people. In Liz in particular, I find this irony of... I was doing all this effort building walls. Protecting myself. I'm doing it right. Right? I'm protecting myself right. And the way she says, yeah. No. The building's on fire. So all your walls, all this effort...
Is actually not keeping you safe. I find that very relatable personally. I also find it very common in, when we're working with students. That these efforts, these patterns to use Hoffman terminology that we think are helping us are actually not. In this moment of realization is 1 of the most profound moments I think we can have as we do this personal journey inward. Yeah. I was struck by... Liz, your last word in that, which was necessary. It was so necessary.
And I think this is what the process helps people do is cast aside and build stronger connections to the things they do want and cast aside those things that are getting in the way. And in order to create the life you want, it's necessary to do the work of pushing aside the patterns. And all the things that obstruct our path, liz. Beautiful imagery too, by the way, the burning building, But it wasn't beautiful when I was experiencing it, but thank you. You're right. Maybe powerful
imagery. Yeah. What, It just... It... As you were just saying, Drew, it, it is a reminder that I think we've all made to students and whether that's on our end enrollment side. But, the week is fast. The week is powerful, and there are moments in the week where you're gonna feel resistant. And it is this reminder that through or on the other side of that resistance is what we want most.
It... It's necessary for us to look at the deep dark places that we might have been building walls avoiding all that. To really break free to the other side. The idea that dark and light exists together. You guys this has been so fun. It's been great to do this. Our second annual end of the year show. Stay tuned for season 6. Let's go all 3 of us are coming back. We have
some great guests on tap. What are you guys looking for to in this next year and in this next year as c hosts I am looking forward to just diving even deeper into graduate stories and the process, and I love the title of our our pot cast. Love everyday radius. And I I am just looking forward to learning and hearing more about how love is and everyone's everyday radius Yeah. For me, I think about the the notion that when we do work like this, it's kind of all about me me me.
But really, as we talk to more graduates, it becomes more and more clear that this work that we do on ourselves, ultimately turns us into people who are more generous, more contributing more impactful, more connected to community, more social, etcetera. You get where I'm going. And and that concept alone to me, is 1 of the most important things that we need in our world.
So thank you to all the graduates who have been our guests and who will be our guests because you continue to inspire me and remind me how powerful this work is, and how far that ripple spreads. I love that. Sharon and also offer to give us feedback If you have ideas, thoughts about how we might shape a podcast. We are open, so please check in with us. And maybe we should also spread some love to, our producer Julie, our editor jordan wall. Wow. Thank you both.
Bet all you listeners are surprised to only hear 2 names because it's such a professional sounding. We should have a long list of credits, but we don't. That's how amazing they are. And let's shout out to the show notes that Julie puts together holy Nike keith. It's like a beautiful book in there a couple pages of ideas, links, thoughts referencing all the things we talk about in each of these episodes. No. I appreciate that, true because I I... I'm amazed at the author and writer that
Julie is, and it brings. It adds the whole another layer to our guest story and allows you to even experience them and learn about them before you listen. So Absolutely. Love you guys. Love you. Bye, guys. Thank you for listening to our podcast. My name is Liza and Rossi. I'm the Ceo and President of Hoffman Institute Foundation. And I'm Asking Rossi. Often teacher and founder of the Hop Institute Foundation. Our mission is to provide people greater access
to the wisdom and power of glove. In themselves in each other and in the world. To find out more, please go to hop institute dot org.