Hey, it's Drew Horn, L New, and myself have a conversation which you're about to too. And in addition to her fantastic Scottish accent, you'll hear El talk about her process and her q 2, both at white sulfur Springs, in her process it was had to be moved in the middle because of a flood that came down the white Sulphur Springs property. In her q 2 on that same property, a fire was nearby and it had to end and be the site and all the students had to be evacuated. How would you deal with that?
L actually uses those events? To support her personal growth. Please enjoy. Welcome to Loves everyday radius podcast brought to you about Hoffman Institute. My name is Drew Horn. And on this podcast, we catch up with graduates of the process. And have a conversation with them about how their work in the process is informing their life outside of the process. How their spirit and how their love are living in the world around them, their everyday radius.
Everybody welcome to the Hoffman podcast. Elle New is on the show today. So looking forward to this conversation, welcome, L. Hi. Who are you? Who are you all? It is great to have you here, I'm looking forward to our conversation. Will you introduce yourself? Share a little bit about who you are? Yeah. Sure. I'm A New. I originally come from Glasgow and Scotland. I came out to Los Angeles to pursue, music, and then I started acting, and now I have made a home here,
and that's what I do. And I predominantly right now during the pandemic, make a lot of things shut down. So I've been really making my living from voice acting. So that's That's me. You have a beautiful Scottish accent. A wee bro, we, how long have you been in the states? I was thinking about that other day. I think it's all coming up on 20 years actually. And it is much of the work you do where you use your accent or do you move into different accents for different voice
over work Yeah. I would say predominantly that I get hired, you know, for Scottish or British. I would say actually most of my stuff is is British, like, you know, at what we would call what... This is where I got confused because when I first moved to your people would see, can you do an English accent? And I would be like, yes. Of course, I can. You know, start walking like this, and then they'd be, like, no 1 American. So I guess here... Don't even ask me. It's confusing.
Here an English accent means American, but I would predominantly do British or Scottish. I've done some irish, but I've also done Scandinavian American, trying to think Russian or, like, an Eastern European accent. I've done I've done all. How's that sound? When I talk like this, you know, like, talk. I it's it's hard to bring out. I sound like count. I count from a the count from Sesame Street. Saying yeah right. So the people I know who have good
voices how often have great ears. Do you notice you listen well and can hear and pick up these things rather quickly? Yes. So when I was a child, my mother said I would read the phone book. I guess I was a v reader, And for me, I would take any book that I had, and I would read it in accents or characters. And I did that, like, you know, that was how I entertained myself. I had an active vivid imagination from childhood. And so I've been... And then I would do presentations,
family parties when I a kid. You know I would... I can't even remember who I would do. But I would imp people, and so I think I've always been good at mimic. I've done some some voice replacement work. I did the voice... In a video game, I did the voice for keep blanche it, and how train your dragon. And I also did Emmanuel Bark. I think that's how you see her name. She's the french actress from mission impossible? I did a little bit for her, and then I did... Is it Vanessa Red?
I did a little thing for her in a video game. It's like, sometimes I'll do, like, you know, voice replacement because I'm good at listening and then mimicking. But the accent thing has always definitely always come easily to me, but usually, it's better if I'm reading something, You know. So Elvis this... World of video game voiceover overs. I guess it's a it's a brazilian dollar industry. These video games and the need for voice overs. Right? It is. It is.
And it's become the sort of saying that video games are the new movie space. Like, during the pandemic things shifted and, you know, people weren't going to movie theaters and so a lot of it people were really getting
immersed in video games. And I know it's controversial because people often see what video games are very violent and they cause violence, but, I I think studies have shown that they don't what they're saying is that video games actually help people work through a lot of of their regression, I've talked to people who have Adhd, you know, are focusing issues and so a lot of these games depending on the game be play. It's like, you know, it helps them focus.
Anyone I know who's an Avid gamer says that it's it's something they do to really like, chill out. I don't it was my myself, so I I don't I don't know. But I've asked people. So let's move from this video game and voice over world to your prep process what caused you to sign up for this week long immersive experience? You know, I had a friend that had done the process, and I've been friends with
her for... Few years, and I realized I had a lot of unresolved trauma from earlier in my life, and I had talked to her a few times and she had just kept saying, you should go do hoffman, and you should do... You should go do hoffman, and I just kept putting it off. I kept by any reasons not to. And then world events, shall we say just... There was stuff happening in the world, and I was just feeling overloaded.
With, I guess, the collective energy, and I just was feeling helpless and I was feeling very snowed under, and I realized I just... I need to go and figure out how to address some of this un earlier trauma? I don't know. I just trusted my friend. She said that it was life changing for her. So... And I did find it to be life changing. I wanna highlight that particular piece there of
this. And thing that you kept putting off and putting off and you know you should go and you trusted your friend, but you still didn't go. So can you say a little bit more about that transition between thinking about it?
And signing up for it because I'm sure, many of our listeners had that same transition between something that they had considered versus something they actually were ready to put their deposit down and sign up for what happened And I know world events really sounds like they expedited that. Yes. World events very much expedited it. I think I was also at that time in my life. I was going through that my marriage was failing, and I just... I knew that I had to do something
different. I had to just take a chance, and I'm also a firm believer that things happen when they're supposed to. And I think that I follow I would call a more spiritual path for myself, and, like, I I try to check in with with my own intuition and and also, like, I look for signs. I don't know. I'm just that kind of person. It it came together, and I just... I felt like it was it was just and intuitively, I just knew. I was like this is the time.
You know, you can have a thought about something, and you can want to do something, but sometimes It's not it's not quite the right time, but at that time, it was just... No. This is this is it. This is the time to go... And so you headed off to your process. Was it that kind of this is right feeling the first couple days or how were your first moments and days in the process.
I do remember at 1 point Linda told me that if I couldn't sleep then they were gonna have to send me home because I was I had so much. I was... I had... I was half really really struggling with anxiety very very badly at that time in my life, and I couldn't sleep.
That was a big problem for me in my life was my chronic insomnia due to anxiety, and I do remember you guys do the checks for a reason, and I do remember that the first I think the first night and maybe into the second night, I just... I didn't sleep a link. I just couldn't sleep. I couldn't and so, you know, my teacher pulled me aside, and she sat with me, and we talked about it, and then we did some work around it. You know, I think we
did some bashing. We did some recycling, like, we really worked around this fear. I mean, it was trauma. I had trauma around releasing and letting them go and you know, let go of control and being in a strange place where I was, you know, I had to trust people. So that was hard for me. And so I would say the cross it in terms of what the process brought up for me.
It was not easy. But, you know, I've also talked to other people about this that the process is designed for 1 thing, but when you come with trauma, and that's a whole other thing. It's like, you know, that's some... You have to work through on top of what you're working through And so that... I'm just really glad that I had the teacher that I had, because
she was very, very skilled at that. And so, L, I'm just thinking about you, because you shared something quite powerful, you said, because of what I've gone through in my life on some level because of what I've gone through in my life, it was hard for me to let go and surrender to the process in those first couple days. Oh, yeah. And so as those days, you know, the weekend moved into Monday, although people forget
what day it is all the time. What slowly begin to happen and how did you allow yourself to surrender to the healing that was there for you. I'm sort of laughing a little because I I wanna give you, like, a story where it was wonderful. But we were actually the process that had the... We had a natural disaster habit. Oh, no. This is good. This is good. So well, it wasn't It's not good, but the oftentimes the good
stories have the meat of real struggle. And will you share a little bit about why that process in particular, although you didn't know it. What what happened in the world for you guys in that process. I'll never forget this because the world was... It was, like... It was, like, the world itself was going through a massive transition. It was a very tense political time, and so, you know, it was very stressful to be
in the world at that time. And so then when we got there, it was pouring with rain, and which I loved, and, you know, I would... I have taken, like, in my my, you know, in my rain boot, and like, a rain jacket and they always have umbrellas and so I would go outside and just sit under the the redwood words every minute I had, I would be outside sitting in the rain and I'm sure people thought I was c, but It just the land there, really... I really tapped into just, like, the land and the
the energy of of, like, that space. It was very, very powerful. And so the first couple of d's, we were we were all starting to trust each other. And then let's just see we we're in a very powerful x her size, and somebody threw open the door and started seeing emergency emergency, but we all... It what's what's so fascinating because I talked to everyone afterwards was we were all so relaxed into the process at that point and we just trusted what was happening.
That every single 1 of us just thought that was part of this this exercise that we were doing, and so nobody really everybody just kinda away, oh, wow Where's this going and you know, and they're... Like, I know Did. I was like, where where's this going Like, what's happening? And so... And and nobody skipped to be.
They continued on the exercise ended, and then we were told that the health hillside had collapsed onto the office the water had risen out of the river, and I was in the accommodation to the, the water had... Had come up gone into the bedrooms and had also flooded out of a lot of the cars that were in the parking lot. That's how high it had risen. And so the fire department had said you have to leave. It's now, you know it's
it's... You have to evacuate because it's dangerous because, like, you know, a structure had been damaged. And for people, who haven't taken the process at White Silver Springs. It's in a valley, a narrow valley. It's full of redwood woods and pine trees, and the Creek runs through it, and when that creek rises, it easily overflows, and it's very much in the shade. And when it rains, in that little valley. It feels like that's all there is in the world is this wetness.
And so when the fire department came and said you had evacuate, what was that like in the middle of your process? Actually, like, I do remember this. And I I was very clear and lucid because, you know, III I've already lived in trauma so much of my life that I was very present. I don't check out during those kinds of times I'm actually extremely present. Like, that's something I realized about myself. And so we just jumped to it and and, you know, everybody was w very, very quickly. We just all
carp. We got our stuff together. He actually let us finish the exercise because there's a part of it where... Which is outside. So once we had established, we were all safe and we had gotten all our bags and together and we were ready to go it was only 1 part of the facility that was a problem. The rest was fine, so they were like, look, we we want you to have this experience because we were actually gonna have go to a hotel. And so we finished up, and then we all just got in cars and we go
over to the hotel. And it was very strange because the 2 days or the 3 days that we had been in white sulfur springs were enough that to go back into the world, it was very jarring. To go into a hotel and be around Tvs and and newspapers and people on phones and bars, and it was it was so hard, but I have to see that everybody at at Hoffman just it was so seamless for us, and I can only imagine how unbelievably difficult that was to put together.
But for us it was just a case of finish your exercise, getting the cars and know here's your hotel room, You know, For us, it was, like, the transition, but behind the scenes it must have been kiosk. At that point, you arrive at the hotel with newspapers and Tvs and other people outside of the process and and yet you continue your weak in the healing that unfolded for you. So what happened then? Well, because None us had ever done it before because I think you only do the process once.
You know, I've done the Q2A couple of times because there's an an extra story attached. To, of course, which we can get to if you want. But, you know, the the process, you only do it once. So we didn't really know we didn't know what the process looked like. So for us, it was just a case of... Okay, it's not great. They were very good about taking phones. Like, there were no Tvs in our rooms. They they took the phones out. They took the Tvs out, which I wanted. You know, I did not want any
connection to the outside world. That was why I had gone to this. And so it was good. It was like, you know, we just... We had different rooms and they set them up, and we did as many exercise. They just kept it go and they just did it, and then we were even able to do bashing. Which I know is integral to the process. And then there's... At the end, again, it was, like, we
just... We didn't... We don't know what we quote unquote missed and not doing it the other way because this is the only way we know how to do it. So we just went with it. It was hard though. I'm not gonna lie. It was hard, and it was especially hard for me because I was already struggling with letting and go and then all of a sudden it was like, or it will know you have to start over somewhere else.
And you think to your process, what were you able to heal that you feel grateful for about the the Hoffman process. What happened for you? So for me, if I'm gonna be dead honest, I don't think that I was able to close the healing, I think what happened for me was an opening at the process. It was not a clear. It was an opening of things that I had never been given permission to feel. I had never been given permission to even admit was was my experience.
And so the process for me opened up a part of myself probably inner child if that's a word that people are familiar with, you know, the inner child aspect, the inner child healing that's the beginning of it for me. I decided I was... I was so into
this work. That I I had gone to a couple of grad groups And I was like, I I'd really like to lead some some grad groups and and I did, so I went through, you know, I went through it, and then I started leading some grad groups and then about 6 months after the process. I realized I wasn't doing so great. Like, I just a lot of stuff was coming up, and III think, like, that's going back to what I said It was like, I I had opened something up that I had never ever had permission to open up before.
And so for me, and again, this is nothing to do with the process per proceed. This is just my own personal trauma and my own life that was like, I I needed support, you know, so I had... I reached out and, like, I I ended up doing a lot of, you know, work with with the teachers, and I decided to come back for AQ2.
Sure. That's such a normal part of it that as you say, so beautifully, it's not the closing of healing, it's actually the opening up of connection, the opening of an understanding and permission as you say. And so you continue that work in the q
what happened for you there? Yeah. So so basically, I stayed very much and the Hoffman work after my process, and I decided a couple of years later to come back and do the q 2, and I arrived for the q 2 And the q 2 is a shorter experience for anyone listening, and we got... I believe into the second day of q 2 at lunchtime, and we were told that we had to evacuate because there was very fast moving wildfire in the area and the winds were maybe 50 mile hour winds,
and they were gonna have to actually shut down the January and that whole area was being shut down So we were actually told we should just go home because it was safer. So I remember A lot of people were really struggling because it's jarring. But I just was like, okay. And I just got in my car and there was another lady from at Los Angeles, and we just it was almost midnight, by the time I got home because it's like a 7 hour drive.
We just left and we drove home and and I got home to the area that I live in, and I was a asleep for 3 hours, and then my phone went off with 1 of those, you know, alerts. And there was a wildfire not far from where I lived, and I was told I had to evacuate from my house. And so then I had to evacuate after end evacuation. And I just... You know, after that, I don't really, I don't really remember much of my thoughts, but I do remember thinking that boil ale, you really do learn
through trauma. I don't you like, you really do learn through these difficult experiences, and I had this moment where I was like, I don't want this to be my life. I just... I I want an easier life. I don't wanna have to always be running from danger and that talk about metaphor, that was what I realized my life felt like, that's how high steaks were for me was, like, I felt like, I was always running from danger.
Oh, like you have such a unique story here, but that something in the nature of the flood in your process, the fire in your q 2 and the fire immediately after the q 2 with evacuation of all 3 of those experiences had you reflect and say, this is a metaphor for my life, and I don't want this This is too much. I don't wanna live like this. Yeah. That was exactly it. That was I remember it was a turning point in my life. And by that point, I was actually going through a divorce.
I was living in a converted trailer on an on a horse property in the middle of the mountains. And it was beautiful. It was exactly what I wanted. I just wanted peace and quiet, and I just... You know, in that moment, I was like, I've been running my whole life. I I recognized it. It was a it was a turning point where I I have been running my whole life from... And that's all I can remember. I've been running from danger. My whole life, and I and I'm not doing it anymore.
So that epiphany that you had has a kind of moment in time, possibly l or maybe a a cellular body experience of felt sense as well. Do you remember where you were and what was also happening in your body? Oh, yeah. So, yeah, I guess, for me, I realized that from a very young Age, I had been I had panic disorder. And I was very anxious, and I was always very hyper vigilant, which is part of why I couldn't sleep a hoffman because it's so quiet there. You know, going
back, that was, like part of it. And then here I was living in this horse property out in the middle of nowhere, and it was very, very quiet and I loved it. It was... It's it's it's an interesting, but I realized in that moment that I think I had checked out. I was just I I think I had shut down. I had just gone through so much in the last... In that 5 years period. I had gone through so much. That I think I had...
My body had just shut down, and I was dis from all of that trauma and all of that danger that I, and then the fire just brought it right back, and I was like, okay, you you you can't run from this you need to face whatever. Whatever is inside that is... That that you're so afraid of, you need to face it. And so that was why I decided to go back to the q 2 couple of months after that. Which I finished woo. You know, I finished that 1, and there
was always jokes. 1 of my teachers called me mother nature. Was like, are we gonna get to finish this? Because Ai here, but, you know, I finished it and what's really fascinating is as we left, that was right when Kobe Bryant, the the your... The helicopter had gone down and there was that sad passing. And so when I was driving back to Los Angeles because this is a, you know, this was Kobe town. And so we... I came back and, like, it was just a lot of grief and a lot of... It
was... It was that's how I go through life is, like, I processed through, I guess, like, the collective energy. Like, I do feel everything that's happening around about me and it was really fascinating, but the 1 thing I will see, you know, to button all of this is that you know, through a process, through AQ2, through another Q2I remember I was I was recently going through all my old paperwork, and I
was shred it. And I looked at my intake paper for each 1 and each time I was like, I just want to... I wanna learn healthy love. I wanna learn healthy love. Like, I didn't really know what that meant. And no I do. And so I think what I got from all of this was a very, very powerful experience of knowing that I can go through anything, and I can survive it, and I'll be fine but also, I learned to really love myself, which I guess I didn't know what that even meant.
I drop in glasgow that's not really a thing. Ram from, Like, it's much more in California, that's more supported. It's more, you know. And so for me, it was... I I didn't know what it was to love myself and now I do. Well, this idea of what is self love but also, just acknowledging your words there about processing through the collective that, you know, through these events that were happening around you, you were reading the signs connecting to the metaphors of what was happening inside of you?
Yeah. I would say that I've always been very sensitive, and I've always been I've always been a little of a little afraid of how much I felt. I was a very, very sensitive child. I had a lot I was very emotional. And so I guess over the years, a lot of children are like that and they just as they grow up, it's like they have... We all have to figure out how to shut that down because you can't go through the world. You know, it's too difficult to live that
way. It's painful and difficult to live with a very open heart and very sensitive when you're also wounded. Which was the difference? So that combination of sensitive open heart with with wounds? Yes. Causes what? I... For me, can't speak for others, of course, but for me, it just created this, I went through life. I was a people please. I over gave. I I just wanted... I mean, I know it sounds naive, and it almost makes me cry. It makes me emotional even still. I'm like,
I just I had this sense. I was like, I just want everyone to be happy. And I just wanted everyone to be loved, and I just wanted peace, you know, it was very it was a very, like, idealistic. I had a very idealistic outlook which when you're a very idealistic person and you're in this difficult world, it's very hard, but when you do the work, and you really, really connect and with that wounded child and you do the shadow work.
You do the work inside of yourself that allows you to really face your shame and face your fears and, you know, even for me with the dis association part. It was just... I just couldn't take it anymore. I just I had to disconnect from everything, and I was kinda shutting and down. And I didn't like that because that's not who I am.
And so I think that for me the the entire process over, I guess it was 5 years, it really just I learned that healthy love, but I I think I was always looking for a love outside of my myself. I always thought that that validation and love from other people was
I needed to be a bear... To be a good person, but now I'm realizing of course that that's not the case that it has to come from within and that's a journey, isn't it realizing that love comes from within is the beginning of it, and then you continue to walk the path of practicing that love within how did you come to understand that love comes from within and not outside of you What happened after you had that epiphany?
After the process, I've always been very passionate about horses, So after the process, I had actually just recently bought a horse an older horse I had sort of taken her on from somebody at my barn. And I realized that, you know, for me, going to the barn every day being out in nature, having a routine that involved, you know, my horse and other animal, and other animals around me. I I phoned kind of a zen, and I found a safe space with horses, and my horse had a lot of health
problems. She's an older horse. But I learned with her. I I got very grounded, and I learned to really, like, show up in a different way because I had bought her specifically to ride, and then I couldn't ride her, and so my my plans changed, but my love for her didn't change. So it was like, okay. So how do I how do I create a fun life for her and for myself because we can't do the thing that I thought
I needed to do, which was right. And then I learned so much from just being on the ground with her, and I learned you know, to connect with her. I learned to listen to her in a different way, and she's very... Horses are actually very comm communicated. They're very emotional And so I had bound out from another Hoffman graduate about this training work, and I actually did sessions with Rebecca, and then I ended up doing the training work, which is called E coaching, e coaching.
And So no, I am almost 2 months out of my graduation from certification, and I'm... I will be working with people on the ground with horses to facility, you know, healing work through horses, coaching them.
L, as we wind down, I just want to acknowledge this theme here of you, keep taking what life gives you and working with it and learning from it, whether it's a horse that can't ride because of an illness it has or a process that can't be in the same place because of mother nature, you really have this ability to be resilient in the face of the challenges in life. Do you see that too?
I do know. And I will see the the thing that I've learned is that, you know, life is just once I really sunk to my once I allowed myself to sink into being spirit led, I I started to listen more, I started to really pay attention to what was happening Right about me and I would see that every single person, every single challenge every single good thing, every single bad thing, anything that you have that comes at you in life as a lesson, and if you're willing to allow things to teach you.
Then you gain a lot of wisdom through that, and that's really what I just surrendered to. And then 1 of the other things was I recently realized that, and I'm sure this is true for everyone, but, like, I just came here. I think, like, as a being, I came here to learn to love. That's really... I'm here to learn the lessons of love and and however, those show up for me. And so I've surrendered into that. Okay. So What can I take from this? What can I learn from this?
How can this make me a more loving person, a more tolerant person, and that's really my lessons and that's my that's my journey. I'm here to learn the lessons of love, l. Thank you for this conversation. Thank you. Thank you for listening to our podcast. My name is Liza and Grass. On this Ceo and President of Hoffman Institute Foundation. And I'm Ras Rossi, Hoffman teacher and Founder of the Hoffman Institute Foundation. Our mission is to provide people greater access
to the wisdom and power of love. In themselves in each other and in the world. To find out more, please go to hop institute dot org.