S5 Ep. 3 - “The Christ Nail”

You can watch the original episode we'll be discussing in every other episode of HBO's Curby Your Enthusiasm, including the new and final season, on Max. You can also watch the video version of the history of Curby Your Enthusiasm podcast on Max and YouTube as well.

Links available in the episode description. Okay, so we're here, Jeff, Yes, you and me? Baby. I am Susie Esmond.

Yes, I've got Jackie Robinson and Robert Mitcham behind me. They support me.

You know what I have behind me?

Look, by the way, I gotta give you credit. I'm Jeff Carlin. By the way, everybody you always do like the season poster behind you? How did you get all those?

I don't know which season is. I only have three season posters.

Okay, I don't know.

Just by the way, switch them a rout.

Yeah, I just know, I know, you know. Yes, this might be one of my favorites. This cover behind you.

Yeah, that's the great with the shrink and the shrink hung themselves.

Or it could be a woman with very masculine legs.

Is it me?

Yeah?

So we are now on season five, episode three, the christ Nail and what I you know, I don't know if this is one of my favorite episodes or if I remember shooting these scenes and enjoying doing them so much.

So I don't know which one it is.

I don't have There's a couple of things in there that I there's one where you kick Larry out with the anyhow, we'll get to it.

We'll get to it.

But that scene I love. The hallway scene with the three of us a great scene. And by the way, as we mentioned, I think one of the scenes we have the most fun and is one of the funniest scenes we've ever done, is coming up in a later episode.

Yeah.

I think it's in two weeks. I think, okay, two or three weeks.

Okay, But the point is that's fun to look forward to, and we'll tell you when we get to it. But it's easily for me it could be number one, but top three for sure.

But one of my favorite scenes that I have did was actually in this episode because it well, we'll get to it.

No, no, when Cheryl, I'm okay, yes, yes.

Yes, okay.

So here we are the Christ Now.

This is season five, episode three, correct.

Okay, And we start with Larry at the podiatrist and he's got these new orthotics in and they're very loud.

They're squeaking. Okay, they squeak.

So one of the ways to fix that is to put baby powder and that I wear orthotics on the top and the bottom only helps you for about an hour then it goes right back. But the noise, the noise we used is clearly post and I don't know if it's a post house that have that recorded or they someone did it and they recorded it, which I'm thinking of modern romance with Albert Brooks. Anyhow, point being is that was so accurate, accurate I never had Oh no,

But the podiatrist says, it just takes a while to break in. Is that true? Do they break in? They never break in?

No?

Yes, certainly they're more comfortable and they break in. But I have some for dress shoes and regular shoes. But I gotta tell you it depends on the shoe. It really does. Certain shoes squeak, other ones don't.

Because Jimmy, my husband has them, and I never noticed a squeaking walks delicately.

No, he floats. Did you ever notice that your husband floats. It's one of the things I love best about him. He's a floater.

He's a floater.

Yeah, Okay, keep.

Going, so Larry, Larry, you know it says they feel great.

He loves the orthotics.

And then he goes home and his handyman, hay sus is they're fixing something. And hay sus is what we call in Yiddish a fabysson upon him.

He's a very and by the way he was on played a tough guy and better call Saul, by the way, the nice his name.

Is Lobo uh Sebastian I think, or something like that.

Any point being is as tough as he looked. That guy was a sweet, gentle guy, you know. I mean, he walks down the street, you're gonna go fuck me, and then you have a conversation where you go You are just the best guy.

It was one of the most was he also in Breaking Bed.

I don't I remember him, Better call Saul whenever I see you. And I saw him in another movie that I think the scene took place on some dirt road. But anyhow, point being is, whenever I see him working, Whenever anyone who does curb that's a character actor and I see them in something else, I get crazy happy. Whenever I see him, I'm like, look at you.

You know, of course, And Lobo, who plays Jesus, he's by the way for.

The rest of the episode, would you refer to me as Lobo? Lobo? The second.

He seems a little down and Larry asks him a small favor.

See this thing, it's a got that and I need you to put it over the door here.

This is like a Jewish thing, you know.

We put it over the door so every anti Semite the neighborhood will know that we live here in case they want to burn down the house.

And he wants him to put a mesuza up on the door, or as my husband would say, a manusa up on the door because his father's coming. Nat his father is coming in. He'll get upset if he doesn't see the.

Question, do you have a messuza up at your house? No? I don't either. And I've had Jewish friends who are They're not Orthodox, they're more conservative than reform. They're conservative Jews, and they get really upset with me. Why isn't it up? By and by the way, the things Larry says about the missuzza is what's in the back of my head, especially this day in time when he talks about so the anti semi can.

Yeah, yeah, Well there was an you know, you're not supposed to take a messuza off once it's on. And one of my apartments, not the one I have right now, had a It was like this big I swear. It was like Jews live here, Jews live heer Jew's lavie. It was so big and offensive because you're all on the roof, on on the loop of the speaker.

Get off. I took it off. I replaced it with the smaller one so I wouldn't get in trouble.

Well, that had a big one. I've seen the big ones, but I don't. I mean, you got to have a really big house with big doors, you have to.

So this one, actually, this apartment was my old apartment, had a misuzan not only on the outside door, not the outside door, but in the building, you know, the apartment door, but on every door within the apartment.

Are they orthodox?

I don't know what they were. I took them down. I couldn't have them on every door when.

You moved in.

Yeah yeah, oh yeah.

Yeah, because you don't want to be reminded every door.

Mean, you know, but but I don't need to be reminded.

My gut feeling is Orthodox. I can't see anyone doing that unless they're a super Jew.

I don't know.

I do out someone down, and I put a different one up that that my friend Larry Amrose had given me as a household.

Larry Amrose so funny, Okay, good question the view of what he says about the anti Semites. Did you write that down?

I might, I don't remember.

It's so funny. The way he did it is just hilarious. I don't know that I have a person who doesn't have a messasa up. Might just not be into it or whatever. But a lot of Jews don't put it up for exactly what Larry says. It announces when they come hunting for us. And by the way, the death of your children, like it's like every Jewish thing. You know. Well, I'm a proud Jew.

I don't have one up, Jeff, not that I for that reason. I don't have one up because it just would never occur to me. I'm not religious.

However, are any apartment hold on are apart of a house?

Okay, many apartment that I've moved into that has one up, I leave it there.

Yeah, why would that's weird to take it down?

And by the way, I would.

I said that I'm a Jew culturally, and I know Jews hate hearing that. What I mean is, I believe in my God. I love everything about being Jewish. Going to temple. What turned me off too much standing and sitting too much. I like a good sit and maybe an occasional stand. And by the way, Neil, neil, Oh my God. And by the way I dig the kneeling. I think that's cool to be because if you think there's something more important than you, that's beautiful. Whatever it is,

Larry tells Hasus that when his father comes, he has to talk loud because he's hard of hearing, and then Hasus tells. He says, what's wrong, and Hasus tells him that his feet hurt, and Larry tells him about the orthotics and gives him his extra pair of orthotics, which was very kind of him.

No, it's not kind because orthotics are built to individuals.

They have to be fit.

Okay, you can go to the drug store.

And get our doctor Schole's thing.

No, no, even beyond that, they'll sell you a company's make orthotics, which, by the way, helpful. It didn't bother me. But it's not true.

Okay, you can, but it works for the episode, all right, But okay, So then Maria, who is the housekeeper and she's either Hasus's wife or girlfriend, we don't know. She comes in and says tells to try them on. Haysus gives in and he puts on the orthotics, and next we see Cheryl is there with her parents and Larry squeaks in. The squeaking is constant, and.

They're all like, what what is that? And he's like, I gotta break him in.

And Paul is on the couch, Paul Dooley, who plays Cheryl's father, and he's snacking on some chips and Larry asked, Paul, what do.

You do the whole cross thing before a meal and not snacks? I think it's a good question.

No, not a good question, A funny question. Yeah, that's an odd the fact his brain thought of that. I just by the way those things will pop to me. But I ain't no comedic genius. I have moments moments of comedic genius. Larry begeen. Larry and I in terms of comedy, because our sense of humor is almost identical, like when I say silly stuff, he's the one who laughs hardest. Used there, But anyhow, I forgot what I was saying.

Keep going about the crossing snacks, Oh, a crossing with snacks.

So, Larry, when I watch these episodes and we've done what one hundred and twenty one of them or something something something like that, where I just go, where do the fuck? How did he do this?

I feel like that when I read the outlines I read in the beginning.

No, I do too. But it's almost like a comedic magician. But the difference between us is that Larry didn't really discover his humor until his late twenties. He's like, oh, they can do it, because early on he was never the class clown, never anything.

Well, he says that he didn't know that he was funny as a kid at all, never him.

I actually it occurred to me, And you're going to think I'm crazy saying this, but a violinist, who a little kid who hasn't seven years old? Can we I was the funniest?

What do they do whatever?

I'm not a good violin impression. But the point is, I actually believe now it didn't lead to me being you know, richer prior. But the point is, I believe that I'm a comedic prodigy, and most prodigies burn out. So I think I'm lucky that I actually had a career because when you get to it, my skill level of knowing I'm funny was there when I was a baby. I'd make my parents laugh when I took a bath, and then I repeat it and repeat it, and they kept keep laughing. So it's like, yeah, and it just

Do you think they did you a favor when they kept laughing?

Ah? Most definitely. Look look at the life I leand I got a Robert Mitcham Yule Brenner. By the way, took that photo. It's from the Yule Brenner collection. I'm not even kidding you. That was on the set of a movie they did, and it's rocking. Boy. Wait, I

Do you know what Freud says?

Freud said that the only truly people as adults are the people who have lived out their childhood fantasies. Now, unfortunately, most little boys, you know, have a fantasy of being a baseball player or whatever, and it's not going to happen.

And it used to be because we were in such a space era. Astronaut was really bad.

But if you're my fireman, my fantasy. The only fantasy I had as a child was to be an actress. So I have lived out my childhood fantasy.

Okay, I didn't know, being funny was a job until I went to see Jimmy Duranty with my parents and I was in awe of the whole thing. On the way home, I asked my parents, is that a job? I mate, is that a job? And my prayers go, yeah, that's a job. I go, well, that's the job that I want, and they chuckled. Right, you know, but I live my dream. I'm so damn lucky, blessed whatever you were saying are no, But it's like, yo, yeah, I'm happy with my success, but my success as a comedian

My goal was to be like John Belushi with better health, and I was just going to say that would not be a goal because you know.

I'm just saying he just inspired me deeply. Other people did too. You know. Anyhow, let's move on because this shouldn't be all about me. But we need to learn what's Jeff about? What does he care about?

You want to know who I wanted to be like when I was a kid?

All right, all right, hold on, I think that you wanted to be like what's the woman who played the mother on The Brady Bunch.

Florence Henderson.

Florence Henderson, you wanted to be Florida, and you reminded me as a kid when I met you. We met each other when we were eight, and I said, you're a young Florence Henderson.

Now I wanted to be Carol Burnette.

Oh okay, what if I told you you could have done that? You still could, But unfortunately, because I wanted to be Jackie Gleeson. Yeah, that's I mean. Yeah.

But when I say I wanted to be I don't I don't mean I wanted to be her. I meant that I saw what she was doing and I thought I want to do that.

Yeah, and I kind of did.

Okay, yes, but we both would have loved, just like Lison and Carol Burnette, a variety show with singers. We liked different stars and different characters. No, but do you know what killed? It killed the variety show and that was my dream? No? Nah, cable TV. Oh yeah, because you can create your own variety show by changing the channels.

Right.

Oh, I want to see this. I want to see that. So no one cared anymore. All right, Hi, Carol Burnette.

Hi, we'll be right back, Stay tuned.

Okay, we're back, So go through the whole thing about Larry says, if you'd be crossing all day long, if you have to cross before every snack, And then Maria comes in and walks by and we see Cheryl and Cheryl's mother kind of give her a dirty look, kind.

Of a dirty one they give her.

She doesn't notice, and we're not really clear on why they're giving her a dirty look at that point. And then Larry asked Paul what's around his neck? And he has a raw hide thing with a nail and he tells him it's a nail from the Passion of Christ and he got it on the internet and he says to him, have you've seen it? And Larry says to j Nuts about this Jesus guy, aren't you he also.

Did a passion of the Christ that he you know, he did like the hesitation that it wouldn't work, and he kind of gave him a good for you and not me you And Paul tells it, well, I have a personal relationship with Christ. Really.

Yeah, see, I can see worship Jesus. If you were a girl like I God had a daughter Jane, I'll worship of Jane. But you know, to worship a guy like a little ton of you know, it's a little gay, isn't.

It the Son of God? With you?

I'm saying, well, I would worship Jane if he had a daughter, Jane, I could have a real relationship with an have a daughter. It's a shame it wasn't a girl. That's all I have to say. Good looking woman, zoft dick, but sense humor, that's fine. If he had a d everybody, everybody would worship change.

That's all I'm saying.

Cheryl does her okay, okay, It's like that should be a drinking game.

How many times Cheryl says okay?

But was fascinating. Not the gays a bad word specifically, but the things that Larry er I say that are inappropriate. There's generally somebody there to say something. And by the way, I added a scene later on when we played softball in New York with Ye Yeah season and and Robert Smigel was the coach. He was the guy that gave you an orgasm. He's the coach and he goes, let's beat them blah blah blah blah, and then he says, let's kick them in the cunts.

No, let's fuck them in the cunts. I think he said whatever, all right, whatever, but us.

No point being is we were gonna Larry and I walk away like Larry. We gotta that's what I call him. We have to when we walk away, I have to say to you kick him in the cunts. Who says that and he goes? I know, because without that it's.

Just well, yeah, in the room comment, right, But it was quite funny when he said it.

I know, But it was also people without a sense of humor would be really they probably were. Then again, people who don't have a sense of humor don't We don't want them.

We don't want them watching the show. If they don't have a sense, don't.

I know.

I've met people male and female who just can't watch. It makes them uncomfortable. But they also to me, if you don't watch Curb and it doesn't make you incredibly happy and make you laugh, please yeah, don't watch.

But they're not, don't you know. We have a very loyal No.

For sure, thank you any of you for listening.

And he says, Larry says, I mean if he had a daughter and she was kind of zoft, Dick and her name was Jane. That run, I absolutely run.

There's a lot of good runs in this episode.

There is.

And then it's nighttime and and Larry is going into his bathroom and he sees Cheryl's brazier hanging on the bathroom hook, and he goes to look at the size and he's disappointed.

He is a disappointed look on his face. So Cheryl asked what he's doing, What are you doing? What are you doing?

Nothing?

I was your bra was kind of was about to fall off, and let's bring it back on, all right? And I felt like you were looking at my size? Oh well, I didn't deliberately set out to look at the size, but iways had the bra in my hand. And it's kind of like, you know, if you have a driver's license, you check out the date of birth.

That's all, okay, check it out.

You think h And She's like, were you looking at my size?

He's caught and uh, you know, he looks disappointed and Cheryl, no, no, no, no.

He said it had fallen down. He was putting it, putting in the bar.

But she knows he's lying. She could tell.

And Cheryl tells him that he's gonna have to let they're gonna have to let Maria go because she's walking around without a bra and that it's unseemly.

And Larry says, well, why don't you tell her to get a bra? And she's like, oh, I'm not going to tell her to get a bra.

Larry says, I'm going to tell her because she makes the best chicken salad. I just cannot lose this woman. She makes the best chicken cha. Again, this is another example, jeff of I was going to say something that Cheryl Hines would never in a million years be behaving that way, but.

The character Cheryl would for sure.

I don't know. I thought this was a little stretched on this.

It's like, no one watching would go I bet the chicken salad has something to do with the story, you know. It's just I like her chicken salad and you have no idea what the callback is.

The of course, when I was watching this, I didn't even remember that.

No, I didn't remember it either, and I'm in the scene. Yeah, I did not remember it at all.

This was a long time ago.

So then we Larry is in the kitchen with Maria and we hear the squeaking, and she thought it was Haesus because now Hayesus has the same orthotics and it is also squeaking, and they talk about Larry says he could be quite a downer and Larry brings up the brazier.

You know we couldn't help, but notice that you don't worry a.

Oh no, I don't like them, not for me, not for you.

No, because you know I got my father in law here distracting, distracting, flopping going on.

No, they don't flop flopping, don't like the support things.

They're comfortable. I haven't won one in fifteen years.

They've made some great technological advances in bras in fifteen years.

Larry says he kind of needs to wear it.

They're distracting, they're flopping around, and she's like, there's no flopping, there's no flopping going on, and she finds it uncomfortable, and Larry tells her they've made a lot of advances.

They're inviting and cozy and comforting.

He tells her, Now, now what's interesting is you know this, but I don't know that all our listeners know this. Larry, before he started doing comedy, was a bra salesman.

Oh I didn't I knew he was a limo driver that has never written.

A bra conversation, so he starts.

He says, now they're in the Pema cotton, Pullma cotton, Pema cotton, and he offers to buy her a bra. And next we are at our house and Larry is squeaking in and Jeff, you can't find the can opener, and you tell Larry you think our housekeeper is stealing, but you're not completely sure.

You think so, but find the.

Way again a seed as it's not anything but a seed, which leads to your favorite scene in the show.

And then Larry's one of my favorites.

Yeah, And Larry tells tells you that he has to buy his housekeeper a bra, but he doesn't know her size. And so I come in with Sammy's teeth, with Sammy's tooth that just fell out, and I start talking about, Ah, the tooth Fairy's coming.

I'm coming to get money from you for the tooth Fairy.

And Larry's like, she's like eleven years old, and he's shocked that she still believes in the tooth Fairy. And I tell him it's none of his business. He doesn't know anything about children.

Ryay, awesome, you're awesome in this.

Y Yes, thank you. And then then we catch him staring at my breasts.

And you say, what are you looking at?

You?

What are you looking at? And I am holding the tooth. I remember it's because I was holding the tooth right.

By the way, did you choose to do that or did they tell you to die?

I was directed to hold the tooth there, yeah, because camera, Yeah, for camera purposes.

Yeah, well I'm that funny. But anyhow, you have the tooth there, so he could have easily said, you're your tooth. We might have.

That's right.

And then I leave and Larry tells you he thinks that I'm the same size as Maria, And Jeff says, he asked you what size, and you say, you don't know, but you can find out. And then you say to him, do you know what size Cheryl is? And he says, I just found out, And frankly, I'm a little disappointed, and you start beak up sea cup and then you say to him, you don't tell me Cheryl's size. I'm not going to tell you Susie's because you two are so mature in your relationship.

And by the way, he ended up not telling me, which it's really been which by the way, except the disappointed line is actually a noble gesture for that character to say, no, I can't do it. But what's next.

That's a very funny scene. Then you're watching.

Basketball and Larry starts, I could be general manager.

I just need the opportunity, you know, bullshit.

I don't remember if it made the episode any of the episodes, but he did something. He told me, and this is he I alone. We're talking between not a camera, off camera, and he says to me, you know, I was really good basketball player. I could have made it to the pros. And he's being totally sincere. I could have been a small guard. I could do this. And I go, because I know how to like have you know, I make him elaborate and I go, well did you practice what did you play on? And he says no,

Beautiful, all right, So then he goes to the bathroom and he's squeaking along, and he goes by our laundry room and he sees my bra sitting out the laundry room. So he grabs the bra and he looks at the size, and then he chooses to kind of put it on and feel what it feels like.

I think that's a joke in itself, which it is, which is kind of but the call back to that and the question you ask him is fucking awesome.

Yeah, keep going, but it's very That scene in the laundry room is hilarious.

And then he comes out of the bathroom and he's squeaking, squeaking down the hall just as.

I'm putting the money underneath.

Sammy's pillow for the tooth Fairy, and his squeaking wakes Sammy up.

What are you doing?

What are you doing with that money? I was checking to make sure the tooth Fairy left it. You're lying, and you're lying.

You're the tooth fair.

There is no jew fairy, it's you.

And Sammy starts screaming.

By the way, I didn't like that because I felt that she just leapt up and hit you hard. And if you're sleeping and putting them. It really bugs me, and I know that I had to have told the director, but no one listened me that you should wake up. Look, I know there's a pacing thing. Wake up a little groggy, go what's going She woke up in the most fake way, you know what. No, well, those things bother the fuck.

Out of me, all right, and she starts accusing me of lying, and like, you're the tooth fairy.

You're the tooth fairy. And then I go out my confront Larry in the hall.

You woke her up, and he's like, well, it had to happen eventually, and it's a blessing in disguise, and I'm like, you know, I just.

Thought of something that we never did on the show, and this scene would have been perfect for it. If she talked to you like you talk to everybody else, that would have been really funny. If she mimicked to her best ability.

Yes, mimic you, which, by the way, no, no.

Hold on, get the fuck out of my room. Get the fuck out.

That she was little, well no, she was like twelve, she come.

But the point is that was a missed opportunity that none of us thought of thought.

But I'm sitting here going if you recall in a later oh it was Palestinian chicken.

Later on in season eight, she did channel her mother.

But it was but by the way, it was awesome, but she was yeah, but we could have established that.

Yeah, you're right, the missed opportunity.

Anyway, So Larry and I get into it, and you come in and whatever, and we kick him out of the house and he goes.

No, no, no, no, no no. You kick him out of the house, and I stand like a cook cold husband with my arm. But I'm cheating on you all the time, all right, So but yeah, I'm handcuffed. But the build of that is beautiful. In that scene, the kickout scene, you start at a level you know, what did you do? Why? And then you're the only person who can go in hot and then blow it all up. But get the fuck out of my house. It's a

Yes, yeh, damn Sammy's tooth.

Yeah, but you do that about other things. And then the joy is of course ruined by Larry. But those are the two ways you hit. And then when you come in hot, you're not even thinking she can go hotter, and you fucking explode. And by the way, never not funny.

Never Jeffrey. Next he's squeaking up the stairs again. The squeaking is just continual.

He wakes Cheryl's parents up, He wakes everybody up, curious thing that they were sitting in separate bedrooms.

The separate rooms. I'm like, we never talked about that on the show. I don't know whose choice the was, but they could have easily come out together. I don't because all right, I'm watching. I'm sure as people listening though, who are hardcore curb and they had to have noticed it because it's fucking weird, just saying because we had them fight on the show.

Ever, No, but a lot of older couples sleep in separate bedrooms.

Once snores when they have gone sleeping. That you know, my.

Partner, Sari lives in a separate house for me, about a ten minute drive, and even if we were married, we would do that. Forget separate bedrooms, separate houses. Like my dream is my dream is I love to marry her and the house by the house next door to me, and she lives there and I live here. It also went up the romance, Oh, who's knocking?

Who's that knocking at my door?

Door?

No, but I understand separate bedrooms. It's just that each of you. It's not a privacy thing.

But it's a sleep it's a sleep thing.

I know, it's a he rolls around, he snores, she yells out vagina all night. Like they all have different things as you do that. Who doesn't, Yes, but anyho, it's I understand it. But still it was weird.

But it was I noticed that as well.

Yeah, but again that might have just been a timing one two three, because it was Paul Julie Sheryll.

You know, by the way we really necessary.

No, by the way we should do. Yes, that was a little bit because when we do those set moments. I find them completely false. You know, the boom boom every moment. This is just my thing, should be a surprise. You go back to Duck Soup with the Marx brothers and both brothers in the same exact pajamas, and Harpo's got and they're Harpo's prepared to fuck with Grouchow, but Groudcho is walking along not knowing what's going to happen. You need sort of like there's always got to be

Yeah, we'll be right back. Stay tuned. Okay, we're back.

So next, Larry is in Victoria's Secret and he wants to buy a bra. And the woman who played the sales girl, she was terrific.

Show with her.

Her name is Lydia Cornell.

Lydia Cornell worked quite often in comedies, and she was on that show where where Ted Knight played a cartoonist, The ten Night Show or whatever it was. She was either his daughter or one of I think she was his daughter anyhow, Yeah, she worked a ton and I was really happy to meet her and that she did our show, and she.

Was terrific in the scene. Absolutely terrific.

In this scene when people not only can improvise because we are casting process, COVID really hurt us because we couldn't be in the room. Yeah, did you ever come to a casting session?

No, No, it's really well.

You come in and you're with Larry. Myself, Cheryl was there a lot of times. Yeah, So if you're scene is with Larry, you're doing it with Larry David, which is also nerve wracking. But we're really we have failed five times, four times when we went with somebody and then they're not gonna work, you know, but let's just cut it and we'll recast, which we've done. But it's a very thorough process. So she came in and you see the comfort, relax doing it with Larry. You know, Cheryl,

I remember, it's a it's a difficult thing when you have somebody who's so strong like Larry, you need somebody who's going to be able to be at that level.

I mean you can't just you know.

Well you can't be intimidated. Yes, but that's the thing about acting performing in general. It's experience, and so it's a comfort level, you know, being natural. And I've grown into putting no spin on my acting. I don't try and make anything funny. I just say it the way and matter of fact. That's why I fool people all the time, and I have to tell them I'm not being serious, which I feel for them, and they'd go okay, I keep going okay.

So Larry goes into Victoria's secret he's buying a bride. It's first housekeeper, not for him. He makes that very clear, not that there's anything wrong with it if it was for him, which he says, yeah.

I'm interested in buying a.

Bra No fear, sweethearted, your wife.

Actually my my housekeeper, hell housekeeper. Okay, I'm not making it up. It's really not for me.

Fine, okay, No, it's not for of course, it's not for you. I believe you.

Of course.

Not okay, you know, not that it's anything wrong with it, No, because I know, but there is something wrong with it.

What am I saying, not that.

There's a lot.

I can't say that I like to walk around with underwear on my head.

Is there anything wrong with that?

Is there something wrong with that? Yeah, there's something wrong with that.

So you really do need to broaden.

Yes, oh, yes, something comfortable.

She hasn't won one in fifteen years.

I need something comfortable, not a French made out.

No, no, it's not a Lacey French made out.

And he wants something comfortable and soft, and she shows him.

You know, she's assuming that it's trying it her self. And everybody said the underwear line, which is right coming up.

We're coming up, and that it's so soft that he said maybe they should make underwear out of this stuff for men, and she says, you see, that's what I'm talking about.

Feel free to try anything on.

I know, you know, it doesn't He's like, it doesn't make me a pervert that I thought. You whatever. They go back and forth and she's just terrific. And you know, I remember that scene because I remember how good she was. And the scene was actually quite short, and I remember it somehow being longer, but it was a very short.

We cut it down.

But you know, when I realized also watching this episode, and I'm actually not a curmudgeon, but in terms of exchanging looks and what I say and explaining things, I'm more like Larry offscreen in terms of I talk to everybody and I'm curious about what they're wearing. The old time, one person like I went into a movie theater and there's a guy behind the counter, like, there's a man bun, which I've always found interesting. Unless you live in Europe

Myself a miss, but you know, you know what kills me though, when people do things to draw attention to themselves and then don't want the you know what I'm saying.

No, I know, I know. But by the way, someone who embraces whatever they are and such a way, that's colorful. I dig that man, that guy. People like that make the world a better place when they really embrace who they are.

And you know what, fashion it really should be fun. Fashion is an expression.

And then Larry brings Maria a very large selection of bras and he's very.

Proud of himself because he thinks he nailed the size.

No, no, no, he bought. He bought different sizes.

Yes, but he says he thinks he nailed the size and he's very proud of and she tries it on and she looks great.

She's so happy, she's so comfortable.

And then he comes upstairs and comes into his bedroom and Cheryl and I are waiting for him.

I just say him, you're a sick fuck.

And I show him the video because I tell him that we have cameras in the laundry room because we the houselipper is stealing, so we put the nanny cams around, which, by.

The way, I wouldn't even think that was going to happen, do you know what I mean?

I didn't see it exactly exactly.

And we see the video of Larry mincing around trying on the bra and he says, well, he wanted to see what it felt like washing dishes.

I said, is that how your made washing his dishes? Is that going out?

But he also said other things moving around, going around the house, cleaning stuff, and wanted to feel your impression of that doing the like is that how you didn't just say it how she does the dishes, which I mean.

That was great, and you know, staring at everyone's breasts and and Cheryl's like, why are you buying her a bra?

I love the scenes where you and Cheryl really time up and we have no idea what to say.

And I tell him keep you goddamn hands off my brazier, and Cheryl's tells me she caught him looking at her bra and you know, like it's just a sick fuck with a fetish of bras And and then I tell Cheryl about him waking up Sammy, and then Cheryl says him, where have you been?

And he says brush shopping and then he walks out.

Hold On. In the second though, he gets into an argument again with you about the tooth.

He yells at you about the tooth fairy. Yes, I want to say.

This scene, all the things you're saying and doing, there's no you know, maybe it's written Susie is upset with Larry, but you're making all this shit up. Well, we all do, no, no, But it's like I watched this scene and I go, I wonder if people know that this is all improvise from a very well it used to be back then it was a very short outline, you know, same.

With your scenes like that, hilarious scene earlier where you're guessing Cheryl's bra size.

We had no idea we were going to do that. That just happens, and you know, we do it two or three times because we're pretty happy with the first one. But that is so much fun. That's what's fun about the show.

Oh I see here where I see that? Okay?

So then Paul is asleep on the sofa because we've already established Larry welcome up with the orthotics the night before, so we didn't get a good night's sleep, and Larry sees the mozuzza on the and Maria comes in and that's when she's showing off how comfortable she is and how good she feels. And that's when he asked her, where's haystus? How come he didn't put up the Messusa? And she says, hey susus, upset that Larry was talking to Marie about her breast.

He said, mister David can go fuck himself.

Right, Okay, good, Right, that's where that was. And then we see Nat Larry's father pulling up and Larry starts to freak out, where's a hammer, Where's a nail?

He's got to put up? The Masusa.

So Nat doesn't get upset, because that is the kind of thing that Nat would get upset about.

Oh, by the way, yes.

What's amazing about Shelley's performance all through the show, which kind of you know, you knows just how subtle he was, Yeah, and quiet, quiet and subtle, and then in character he would make like that he was happy. He said, don't do this and this is not the old part. There are some okay, so yeah.

That's next. Okay. So he's looking for a hammer. She tells him where the hammer is, where's a nail? He doesn't have any, And.

He sees Paul asleep on the couch with that that for cock and nail around his neck and he tries to take it off, which is a whole big you know, can't get it over his head.

But by the way, I see, I didn't buy that the nose, all of it, because.

He wouldn't have woken up.

Yeah, no, no, I'd buy that. He's not waking up. That's all good, But the joke is still funny if he just pulls it off his head. That's not what we're doing. It's about the nail. It's not about it. But that's you know again. Sometimes I'm not listening.

To I know where you're going.

No, actually I know in the back of my head, but I was not going there.

Trust And Paul wakes up and it's blasphemy and he's upset, and Cheryl and I come down the stairs and it's pandemonium. We're all shouting and screaming, and Larry is putting up the messiussa with the passion of the Christ nail and Natt walks in.

He's like, kiddo, it was so.

Light and natural. He touched it, it was warmed by it, and I thought.

That was Jeff, do you touch it first and then kiss or do you kiss and then touch it?

Well, by the way, that's uh.

I don't know somebody, well, right, can I be honest with you?

Don't even want to google it? Accept anyone? Do I see kissing their hand first and then touch I believe it's a kiss and touch. That's why I believe it is. But if they do a touch and kiss, I'm good with both, because you're showing respect.

If you hear snoring in the background, that's my dog right over here is asleep and snoring very loudly.

I can hear it.

So I felt that you were going to say, if you hear snoring in the background, my dog is bored of you.

Jeff, I thought you were going, Okay, Next, we're in uh, we're in Larry's office and you're there and you're both eating chicken salad sandwiches and it's the best chicken salad ever that you've ever had.

And there was a moment where we both are laughing really hard. Do you remember what it was about the chicken salad or whatever, because that scene, I'm on the couch, he's behind the.

It comes up.

It's and he tells you that she's very happy about the bra and that he nailed the bra size.

He's very you know, proud himself.

And you tell him, me should get a job at a carnival somewhere to get the broth size.

And we don't know it's gonna work. Holy shit, And then he started doing what he would do as a carnival barker who collects. I mean. And by the way, when you see Larry and I laughing on screen, or we're laughing at Susie or whatever it is, those are one genuine.

Laughs, yes, like we are laughing hard.

And how absurd it is, and how funny it is and those are real laughs.

And he tells you that Heyesue's freaked out about the bra and quit and told him to go fuck himself. And then you asked if he replace the nail, and he says, yeah, he ordered a new one. And then he bites down in the chicken salad sandwich and his tooth fell out because it was a bone in the chicken salad. And then we hear squeaking, squeaking, squeaking, squeaking.

Yeah, it's like a real horror movie kind of.

The way we did the sound effects on the show for the shoes was perfect.

Yeah, I agree with you. Larry says it's Haesu's.

He looks out the window, he sees it's Hasus and we see Haesu's coming Lobo and he picks up a sign that, you know, some kind of I don't know, for sale sign or whatever, and he rips the sign off and it's across it's two pieces.

Of wood, was a cross, and he's holding it and he starts.

To come after Larry, and we hear that that that I forgot what the music is called, but it's this religious music playing and he's coming after Larry, and Larry's running and.

All of a sudden, Haesus falls in pain. He stepped on.

The nail that Larry drops the passion of Christ's nail and it's in his foot and you guys pull it out.

No no, no, no, no, no no, wait. We do something that bothered me, which is no. But that's after we start discussing about the nail blah blah blah, and the guys on the floor.

Oh yeah yeah, And I.

Just thought, are Larry and I that ignorant? That cruel? Are characters? And I really thought, no, we would have we would have a beat, pull it out, fat. So we're having a fucking conversation, all right, keep going.

So then you pull the nail out and it's like.

Oh and they you know, they lift taste sus and they drag it.

No no, no, no, wait wait wait they pull the nail out and they look at it like it's a miracle. Right, And someone decided to post to have a glow to the nail on.

Yeah yeah, yeah, fucking hated it. Yeah that's not necessary.

It was not the biggest ball of not necessary. So you know, and then when I did it, with him, and he looked at it. I never imagine in post that would be. And again I fought that one.

All right, keep going, And then we cut to Larry's sleeping peacefully in bed and he wakes up and he puts it like fumbling with the pillows, and he sees this five dollars underneath his pillow that the tooth fairy apparently left him for his tooth that fell out. And he turns to Cheryl and he's like, very funny, and clearly Cheryl's has no idea what he's talking about.

No, I think she clearly put it there. There's no master.

I don't think so.

So you think an actual tooth fairy whatever, keep it. Maybe you came by in your bra, in your bra and put it underneath.

And that's the end of the day. It was a great button, think.

No, no, But it was a great button. But also Cheryl played it perfectly, and Larry's reaction was perfect. That being said, when she did it, I know that she put it under his pillow.

See, I didn't think so. I thought it was just one of those.

Magic realism bullshit okay, yes, which I've enjoyed in movies. There have been movies. Look at groundhoud Day, Yeah, you know, I love that movie, but I don't know, all right, but it's great.

Button and that's the great button of the episode. And that's that's it. That is the christ Nail, Season five, episode three, and we'll be back next.

Week with episode four. Thanks for listening. I really appreciate it, and I'm assuming Susie does too.

I do Bye, Thanks, okay.

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