I was a ten fifty Christmas and in my head I was like, I'll be like so in love by my fiftieth and my partner will like just put on such a beautiful party for me, and it will just be fabulous with all my friends, not be wonderful anyway, No boyfriend arrived in time. Hello and welcome to the heart of it.
We are recording from gadigal Land today and while Cam is not with me, I actually have an incredibly special and dear dear friend with me. You may actually have heard of her, the gorgeous, the divine Catherine Mahoney.
So exciting. It's not our first road, dear, there was it. We've had a few pods together. I know.
In fact, we became really dear dear friends when you came on so p at bathrooms with your book currently between husbands, and we kind of fell in love with each other there.
I think I fell in love with you first. No, I think it was equal to remember, it was like wasn't even in the room. It was just like we've been friends ever since. We have proper friends, proper friends, like literally have cried on you, You've cried on me. Yeah, we've laughed together. Yep, we've eaten a lot of stuff. We've been in the water, We've been harry, we've been less hairy. That's on the beach, indeed, not in private. Why what sort of friend are you?
And I've sort of I've sort of ridden ridden the road with you as you've as you've navigated your time, you know, on your different apps, on the apps, off the apps, like hate the apps, love the apps. And it's just been, you know, having been in a marriage for an awfully long time, it's it's I'm living totally vicariously through your extraordinary love life.
Extraordinary what do we call it? That I think. I don't think it's active. Although we've had two spikes, have we this year? Well, it's been if it's.
Been nothing, it has been interesting, like right, very interesting, very interesting. I still have to see so, just so the listeners know, I don't have a lot of sleepover action.
Yes I would like more. I don't know a lot. But we did end up having some sleepover action from the app. There was a build up, took a couple of weeks, and you were the one that made me tell two people in the building that I had a gentleman caller coming over and Casey killed me. I did. I don't know.
I think I've watched too many I survived TV shows.
I was like, what happens if he's just? He's just? I was like, if I do get killed, this is the photo I like them to put on the news.
I know, we need a proof of life in the morning to make sure you're okay.
Yes, well, there's lots to talk about this.
I know there's that There's quite some interesting things that have happened with you and are happening also with you. You're such a creative As I said, You've wrote your book currently between husbands, you're working on another book, which is not a sequel, but it's because the first one was more, you know, autobiography of your life, but this one's got more of a fantasy element.
It's fictional.
But can you just explain a little bit about it, because I think there's going to be a lot of women lining up for this book. Well, it's sort of based on a woman who sort of, you know, hits a certain age, her relationship sort of comes to an end, and she's really not sort of had a lot of experience and so not to give.
Too much the plot away. Someone suggests that perhaps she needs to try the other flavors, so she goes on a bit of a flavor tasting. Yeah, and so, as I'm fairly vanilla in real life, I'm like, if I'm going to write about this sort of stuff, I need to I need to get out of my comfort zone.
So tomorrow I'm doing a basic beginner's BDSM course, Yes, which you invited me to which I now weekly said no. Luckily, I've got a really great friend who's an actress, who I persuaded she might need to know these skills at some point in her career. And so we're going tomorrow. I'm such a nana. I've already emailed like the place to go, what should we wear? And should I bring my own food? Because I just am like, even if we're getting tied up, I need to know, like I'm
going to be eating. Yeah, that's exact point. There's a lunch break. What do you wear to a BDSM workshop? Well, something comfortable, they said, so jim Ware. Okay, yes, so yeah, So I'll tell you how it's going. I tell my mum last night I did tell me did it could go? One of two ways, But luckily she just embraced it. Yeah she's been, she's as she says, and it's in my book. She's only ever been with my dad. You know,
that's her only sort of partner. So it's not like Anne Mahoney is a swinger or not yet, not yet yet still time seventy seven. But yeah, so she was like, okay, all right, yeah, do you think she said it's a tax right off? Because it's researched my book. Absolutely.
Do you think she's gone down to like the local pub with a girlfriend's gone? Can you believe what my daughter's up to this weekend?
She didn't know what it was. So I had to say, oh, it's like, you know, kind of being I said, I don't really know. Actually it's being tied up. I would imagine, I know, you get a ball put in your mouth and some kind I don't know. I don't know either, don't know. There might be some kind of gentle role play. I don't I'll come back next.
I think if you're vanilla, I'm like, I'm like a paler shade of vanilla. Even than that, because you're introducing me to things that I have never heard of.
There's just new things all the time. I know new things all the time.
I know you've you've introduced me to some quite interesting aspects of sex life, not that you've done it, but like research, hope, there's all sorts.
It really is all sorts. I was going to also do a shabari yeah that's how you say it. Course, And I love the universes, you know, the crystal in my bra and I like to manifest. So I gone on to sit because I thought, once I've done a basic b DSM, it's like your first day pace one. I was like, right, what shall I do next? And I looked and they do this too. And then this guy on Hinge who's an attractive chap, I say the photo.
He's one of the you can you write bits on your profile and one of his things was if you're interested in shubari or curious about it, it's something we can do together. And I thought, well, that has saved me two hundred dollars. Yeah, so I'm seeing on Tuesday.
So it's kind of like the origami version of of BDSM in a way.
It's probably really wrong. It looks really it's quite pretty. It's Japanese. It's erotic again cloth right, Well, I hope so, I hope it's not from bunning, So I hope it's not sort of really thick rope. Yeah, it's quite soft and pretty. But I was reading an article today now I've gone down this rabbit hole, and it talked about in Japan it was kind of how it was sort of how maidens were tied up, you know, so that's
what they do. I'm paraphrasing really poorly, whereas more in the European countries it's the shackles and the kind of you know, it's how they were all tied up in medieval times that is now in the sex dungeons. So it just depends, I suppose what part of the world you're from. Yeah, yeah, I know. I just think. I just think shibari, if I'm saying it right, sounds just much nicer. It does sound.
Craft of the body crochet with the humans. I actually think you do need to get yourself like a little you know, dressing gown and start putting badges on it. You've done your shibori, you've done on your bady, let's start actually cleaning them all in all.
Yeah, it's got a tantra course coming up to Yeah, so that's that'll be interesting. And then there's Kunderlini yoga, which is more of a sensual moving you. I'm not even on that yet, so I won't say. But what I did like when I was reading about the Japanese rope was they said always have a paris as close by in case you're not gets too tight. Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah,
I can see that. I'm just worried. What if you're in mid like tie up and you get cramps, yeah, or you need a we or you hit with a wave of diarrhea. Oh you just that's another kink. Actually, I'm not interested in. Can we tell the listeners that you said me things like the Ray Fines No, when it wasn't Rayphines. Who was the interview on Graham Norton that was talking about his gloves? Oh yeah, oh it was.
Yeah, it was the guy who lied to the Danish action tress. Yes, my no, he's iron yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.
And his fist gloves. You send me clips of this.
Now, I know because you've introduced me, you've introduced me to fisting.
But like I said, you've opened my way to start anything to talk about is that's not the clip that makes it. But we were both like, can you is fisting front and back is just like we are We do not know. I just feel like it's a blind leading the blind pegging is now yeah, yeah, we figured that out well you you you you think about that. You googled that for me.
So I'm like, and sometimes I've drop something in when we're having a conversation and look at me and you're like, who told you that?
And I'm like, oh, that would be from.
Because when I've had a conversation at Balmoral Beach with you and my eyes, it's been like I've been enlightened such a mid way.
Yes, this is going to be such an interesting book. I cannot wait.
And I know you've started writing it, so there's it's going to be.
But I want it to be comedic obviously, like it's going to be, or I hope it's comedic.
As well as curious. You know, absolutely, that's my word of the year. That is That's what's really taken me. You know, with so many of the guests that we've had on this show, and we've had many couples that are into different things and non monogamy and we've had the sex therapist and it really is that. It's been curious, isn't it? And just hearing what else is out there? I find it really really interesting. Whether you're into it or not into it, but there's so much variety that's.
And we might be into it. Yeah, you know, and we've never done you know. I'm like, you know, I'm an on top and an underneath kind of sort of lady. I mean, there's a whole world out there who knows. Yea, you give it a go.
Yeah, they say, Look, we're both sort of performers in our own way and you have oh you have done, and you're about to start it up again soon.
You took the incredible brave step of creating a one woman show for yourself two nights sold out. Where did that come from? How did you find the bravery in order to do that?
Well? I mean, I think I think we had this moment in the beach at bal Moral. We do our best work, don't make at bal Moral Beach. I was I turned fifty at Christmas and in my head I was like, oh, I'll be like so in love by my fiftieth and my partner will just put on such a beautiful party for me and it will just be fabulous, like with all my friends, not be wonderful anyway, No boyfriend arrived in time, and I just thought, I want to do something to celebrate turning fifty to see all
my friends. What can I do? How can I get them all together? So that was one part of it, and then another part of it was growing up. I really wanted to be like Billy Conley. Yeah, and then when French and Saunders came along and we had female role like I just my only superpower has been to make people laugh and yeah, I can also clear a room. Depends on your sense of humor, I guess, but that has been something that I've loved, loved, like I made Mum laugh last night. Still love it. Best feeling in
the world. Yes, but I have absolute fear of public speaking, absolute fear. I you know, I used to work it over many years ago, and I remember I had to present the publicity to the rest of the company and my hands were shaking something, you know, and these were
my peers. I was giving great news about what we've achieved and I was sweating and in such a state that my boss at the time sent me on a you know, get over your fear as kind of course that didn't work, sorry to the chapteris listening, So it's something I have massive fear over. But I did this podcast for many years. Course, so I quit my day job where I talked to extraordinary people who did one thing and then swapped and did another. And it's scary,
isn't it. Making any change and following your dream is scary? And I think I just I just want I've got to do it before I turned fifty. I want to As I turned forty, my marriage ended and I really thought, wow, this is not what I was hoping for for my forties. But by the end of my forties even the difficult bits had created a decade of wonderful new first and friendships and adventures and jobs. And I think I wanted to be able to say as I turned fifty and I did a one Norman show, Yes yeah, So we
put it on sale. It sold out overnight. The first one sold out in an hour, second one sold out the next day. And then I spent two months waking up every morning at five air wanting to vomit because I knew I now had to do this thing because people have paid money. Yeah, so it was I don't know how I haven't gone alser.
And I and you live that, yes, and me and now are our other dear friend Amanda. We both had second hand just terror for you because both of us are like, I cannot imagine doing what she's about to do. Do you feel braver now though, in being fifty than you were when you were forty or thirty?
Yeah, you do, and you do have you do give less fs Yeah, you know, you really do, and you definitely you careless. And you also realize that, you know, every year we get now is precious. Yep. As we age and we see things around us and people, you know, we lose people and whatever, and so you just in your twenties you've got forever. I think by the time you turn fifty, you're like, this is precious. You know, my mum and dad were fifty two seconds ago their
late late seventies. I see how it flies by. So you do feel braver, You do care less. And I always think, what is the worst thing? Yeah, what's the worst? That's right?
And it was and the worst never happened for your show because we had people were rolling in the aisles literally for both nights. So it was such an amazing show.
I've just yeah, I still get a bit of fear if I think about it. Yeah, And what you have what I've got a good mate, Tim ross Rosso, who's a comedian who also poked me to do the shows. Yeah, and I'm glad that he said to me, when you do comedy like, not that mine was comedy, obviously there was some serious stuff in there too, but he said, people don't always laugh out loud, so you might think
something isn't landing. Yes, he said, but if you think about when you watch a movie or comedy, like, you know, you might just be going, oh my god, I can't believe they just said that as opposed to the bigger falls and the big belly laughs. And so I was glad he said that to me, because you can't hear so much when you're up the front. Yeah, And I was really glad that I had a fabulous photographer called Carolyn who took the shots. Because you're in you're like
a deer in headlights. So to then see the photos the next few days of people doing exactly what you want them to do, and that's like covering their eyes going, Oh my god, I can't believe you just said that. Laugh You just go, oh, yes, it landed. It's so true, isn't it.
Because I mean, I think about that for myself, like I can not be laughing at something a story that someone's telling me a bit, but I could be enjoying it so deeply. But it's hitting me not in a way where I'm loving it, but I'm not. Yeah, I'm not laughing out loud. And that's I've had that experience doing a keynote on menopause and thinking that no one thought that was interesting or good, and then you get the feedback and you're like, oh, you liked it.
You were so it was so quiet. I was doing the right noises because at the beginning of both shows, I say, you know, I'm a big oversharer, but I don't normally do it on mass. This is my first time, you know, just take it easy, be kind. You know, we picked a safe word, didn't we all of us together. And I also said, if you think you've got resting bitch face, like, don't look at me, and it's going
to put me off. And then both nights there were like so many resting bitch face people who then at the end of the show that you're like, he hated it, Yeah, he would have rather been hammering something in Bunny like
you know. And then they're the people that come up and go, oh, when you said that joke about the snail or that you know, you're like, well, yeah, face didn't say that, So yeah, I think I would definitely understand an audience a bit more, only from you know, the couple I've already done, and what's the plan with the show. I think I'm going to lean a bit
more into. I'll still focus a little bit on my pre story, but it'll be a lot in that kind of forties hitting fifties and that sort of the dating space and the stuff that you couldn't make up that just keeps happening to me. Yes, and your husband was great because on the first night when you guys came and he was telling me, you know, the bit that he enjoyed, and I said, oh, I had so much more like masturbating gear to do, but I didn't know if it's too much, and he was like, no, you
got to leaning on that stuff. So the next night I went really hot. So I was like, I think I want to talk about things that women in our age don't potentially talk about but do or think or feel. And if I'm the one that's out the front, you know, talking about my extremely long bottom hair that a friend had to shave because it got like a tail, then then I will take that for the team. I will. Okay, I do a lot of lazer now in the back area. Yeah,
just let you know. Well, that's I was wondering. Yes, filled in the place, filled in the blags.
Literally, I think, I think I know for me, I mean, I'm a little bit older than you, obviously fifty five, but I have found that going through perry and menopause, as you were saying that, you know, giving you caring a.
Lot less about what other people think.
But I have found myself to be much braver at this age, which which I didn't ever think I would like in some In some ways, I sort of feel less likely to do certain things. But I've experienced the power of saying yes to things that I never would have said yes to.
And oh, hello, are you just hosting your own new TV show? Because that's not scary. That was very scary.
But yeah, and I mean, as we were talking you know, we've talked about those those keynotes and getting up in front of people and how terrifying, and I wonder why on earth I've said yes to this job?
We did that every time? Did I say yes? And then post you go? It was really good? It's incredible.
Yeah, yeah, sweat your balls out under your arm.
So sweaty, sweaty. It's a lot, but you do. And I think, yeah, I sometimes I wish that I had more balls when I was younger. But I guess you learn as you go, don't. You're exactly where you're meant to be at every stage in your life.
Is there something that surprised you in menopause or what? Is there something you've discovered about yourself, whether it's physically, emotionally or spiritually.
Why do I go straight to masturbating because it's you, it's me. What have I discovered? Since I suppose? What have I discovered? Well, now I'm on my HRT trio and now I'm on my test austerone cream. I am back in the room. I did worry that that my libido had gone, never to return, So that's something I'm really happy has has sort of come back. I think I wish I knew more in that time before I went to see the doctor and started to talk about HRT, because I just thought, I just thought I was never
going to be me again. That was really scary. So I think then getting your estrogen levels right and you know, everyone's different, but for me, you know that that sort of trio has just yeah, it's just like being back,
being back. What I don't like is that you actually are you know, I wouldn't want to go out with someone who's got to really like fancy like load to the ground car, because I just feel like I would do like myself in getting out and get out of bed and you go, I was just walking and now something else hits. There's definitely a lot more of that. I've thrown my back out from sitting on the couch,
But this is what I mean. As a young person, you'd listen to people like us as if that's ever going to happen, and then you're like, oh, there goes something else, and I'm like, yeah, it's out, okay. Too much sitting down, lying down, I've woken up with a bad neck.
It's I know, the amount of times you hear people say I sneezed.
And my neck was thrown out. I am worried about my bladder. Yeah, I've got sorry, We've got a lovely, lovely gentleman who's producing Xander. You don't need to know what about this happening, Like as I've got older, I don't know what it is like Now, if I need to head the toilet by the time I get home, all I have to do is really open my apartment door. And it's like it's like, well, bums away, and it's like, no, we're not there yet. We're still gonna get a bathroom.
But it's like something downstairs thinks we're at home and they can have a wee. Oh yeah, So I like, is that a thing? Or have I got another condition? No, I think that's a thing.
I'm pretty sure that I think you'd talk to a lot of women our age has the same problem. And I've and I've been on the phone with you many a time when that's happened.
I'm just gonna mute. It's just a week, it's just a way. So yeah, they're they're the joys, the highs and the low Yeah, exactly do you think?
I mean, do you feel like we've gotten better about menopause in the sense of like talking about.
It, owning it hugely, right, hugely, Like my mum's generation. They you know, they didn't try the HRTs, they didn't do any of that stuff. They didn't talk about it, and it's a huge thing. I just think I was really grateful that I had to use a friend because I didn't have the hot sweats scenario, which to me, I thought, oh, if if you're menopausal, I still have my period. If you're menopausal, it's the hot sweats. I wasn't having that. I just went I just had zero joy.
I just really flat lined and thought it was depression. And so I'm really glad that we were friends and I could speak to you about that. But now it's it's so much more prevalent, isn't it, And it's just accepted and talked about, and it's just a thing. But I think coming out the other side, you do feel great again. You feel energized. Yeah, yeah, and that's the thing. A spin class, yeah, probably would probably hurt something, but yeah, so much more energy again, and you want to be creative.
It's great. Yeah, try new things. Yeah, absolutely absolutely. Do you feel do you feel that there's a misconception.
You know, I know that you've we talk a lot about you know, we mentioned earlier about you being on the apps and stuff like that and being currently single. Do you reckon there's a misconception about women being single at fifty or even being married at fifty. Do you think there's misconceptions around that.
I think it's down to the individual, isn't it. Really. I'm a hopeless romantic, as you know, so I would love to be partnered, but with the right person, not just anyone. And I think, you know, there is something to be said about sleeping diagonal in you bed having to deal with A friend of mine was saying that she wanted to kill her husband the other day because the way he was eating bacon, and I thought, oh, I don't have that problem because I don't have a husband.
So is bacon eating doesn't bother me? Yeah, So I don't know. I can only answer it. I suppose from my PERSPECTI I think a lot more people are obviously separating and our generation than there maybe previous generations that just stayed together and made it work or didn't. And so yeah, there are a lot more people on the apps and that's a new thing because most of us our age were married when they win no apps, so it is a very different way to date, right, absolutely.
Yeah. I had a friend of mine talk about She said her husband has had like really bad sort of flu, so he's been sleeping in the second bedroom for like. She goes, it's spent five nights now, she has the best sleep of my life.
I don't want to make in the bedroom. He's desperate to come back in and I've been loving it. She goes, how do I keep him sick so he doesn't come back? It's like small doses of there must be some kind of cold, must be something you get in the dark web.
But I feel like for women more than men, you know, being single at our age, it's almost like.
There's a little I feel like there's still that little bit.
Of like, oh poor her, rather than like how empowering her? You know what I mean, Like the crazy cat lady type scenario. Men don't have the crazy yeah, you know what I mean. It's like he's on his own and he's dating younger or whatever it is. But women, we're so powerful at this age, and a lot of women choose to be single and are incredibly happy.
With you too, I think to as a woman, this is again, this is just my experience on the dating apps now and dating now that I you know, I was lucky enough to have a child. I've got sixteen year old. Feeling less lucky some mornings with a sixteen year old. But I'm not looking for that partner to have a child with. And would I be married again, yes, if it was the right person, but I'm kind of not. That's not the end goal. So I think you can be a bit not more picky, but you can you
date for different reasons. I've got a great friend who just states, like guys who are like twenty years younger enough because she's like, you know what, I've had two kids, I'm divorced, I'm happy living on my own. I really find men who are younger, attractive and just it's a bit more kind of almost transactional. I know that you're not looking for a child and to get married, and you know, so, yeah, I guess we're all in there for different things.
And as far as like getting married or marriage as a whole, has that shifted at all for you?
Yeah? Look, I don't I don't regret my marriage for being together with my with my ex husband for thirteen years and Lewis, and we're all now in a great
sort of setup. And I suppose then I wanted the house and the picket fence, you know, the two point four kids, all of that stuff that we didn't quite have, whereas now I would I would like to be married, because for me, that is that's a real, I suppose form of commitment, like we really want to do this, But I would happily be married and live in separate houses.
I worked in London many years ago, and the editor for the magazine I worked for had been happily married for like thirty years, and I mean they were wadded, but they both had a gorgeous house on the same street in London. That's how it worked for them. So that I like that idea of marriage. Yep, is that Can I do that? If anyone's listening like the sound of that, I might have some rope tricks that mus sleep too. If it wants to propose, Absolutely the soft ropes.
We've got the gloves. I've got the gloves.
Let's got a lot of information at your beck and corner short shots.
So that's what I realized young people go for a really long time just to just to go off off subject. Yeah. I don't like that.
Yeah, it is dating in your fifties, is it?
Is it a bit more like it? Is it a romantic adventure or is it.
Just like a massive amount of red flags that you're like, Oh good god.
I mean look as a writer, it's gold. Yeah, it's absolute gold. There's I mean, there are some really clear red flag straight to somebody. And I suppose it's what you're in the market for in you Are you in the market to taste you know, a younger chap and you know it's just going to be physical. Do you want a long term partner? Yeah? I mean the other day I was on an app and someone basically just wanted to be my slave. Oh. I was like, I
was like, this is like air tasker, but free. I think he just wants me to say nasty things to it. Can you'll do the oven in the fridge? Should you do it by zoom? So it's easier if you want him? Do you want him doing the jobs? Just like I'm just calling you up to do that. He just wanted to see you. You and I we've discussed this before. Are people pleasers to the core, So being a dominatrix, I would be rubbish at mad. I'd be like, do this is that okay? To mind? Sorry, clean my own shoes.
I think I think that means we're subs. Baby, Yes, okay, got it, got it. Yeah we should get badges.
Yeah that sound the next batch subs, which is dipping to the sandwich.
Yes, wow, Now I think that's a sexual position. So there's so much to lose. I went on this at cole Field f e e l D f e e l D.
Yes.
Yes, it's just for kinks. Yep, like literally, so there's me put my full name and all my normal photos, and then I went on there and people are like just their initial blurred out. There's like body parts, there's there's like all of these acronyms. I had to google. It was just like, I'm not doing that. That's not for me, thank you. I got hit up so many times to be part of a threesome, which is nice.
So I think if you're feeling like if you haven't a fugly day, people want with their wife because the boreamorous saw some Wow, Xander's going to have a great time. I'm going to find him on it now? And oh my god, what are you into?
Because I was thinking Field as an f I E l D like it, but like it's I'm Field, Like I feeled the body.
Like it's that Like that's the I love that you've gone into that depth. I'm just like, and I was like, am I pan sexual? Like there's all of these you know, do I want to try a woman like? And if I do want to try a woman like, do I want a shorter woman than me? Or don't want a taller woman like, you know, a bit more of a mess or a lady that can lift me up in the shower as I get older and I can't get in. Yeah, there's all sorts of things to think about. I know.
It's a lot, isn't it, which is why I'm doing the research and making all fiction.
Yeah, I mean some of the stories that you have told me over the years, I just I mean, like, you can't make that ship up.
Like this is what I mean. And I screenshot it to show you because and also as menopausal woman, we forget, so I have to write it down straight away. Yeah, all of the stuff I'm like, keep going, Yeah, this is wonderful. I matched with somebody on hinge the other day, which is a kind of normal one hinge and although the Shibari guy was on a hinge too, which I think he should have been on field, but it's fine.
It saved me. Tow Ldred does he's probably on that. Yeah, And this guy matches me and he was like, you know, oh you're so beautiful, and which is nice, you know, and he was like a really tall well he was. He was a really tall, kind of Danishish looking guy who wasn't Danish. And then and then I said, oh you too, and he said, oh, only one problem and I was like right, and he said I'm gay. And I said, okay, should you have should have? Should you have ticked the chaps like box? You liked the chaps?
And he was like, oh, I'm just I'd like to make some female friends. But also if I if I make a female friend and I like her, then maybe I would want to try more. And I was like, I didn't tick that box. I ticked the box for a man that was definitely going to put you to be with a lady. So I was like, wtf. I mean, so it's a lot.
Out there not like, let's be platonic until I might want to possibly have sex with you.
But I'm not sure. There's a guy on Tinder who's who's thirty two, because I think if Bradley Cooper is with GG, that's like twenty years, so this guy's you know, this is not twenty years. This is eighteen. So I feel like, if it's all right for Bradley, should be all right for the ladies. But the thing is, I really like, look of his mum. Do you want to be friends with them? And I wanted to say, I think your mom she's she's got Lee Matthews dress and I've got that, but I didn't know if that was
sexy anyway. So these are these are the pitfalls, pitfall that the highs and the lows of my dating life from my sofa. And I love.
I love when you've like sent me like text messages of like this is he's used too many emojis, He's he's off the list. I've I've unmatched with him because the emojis has gone too much.
I'm like, oh my god, like that. I can't even it's the IX, like it's the IX that you don't know you've got like for me men with cats, like there was a man with one of those hairless cats sort of that was like a bit kind of I'm allergic to cats, so that's never going to work. Great men that play guitar and do a video about themselves playing guitar that gives Having worked at Sony Music with the greats, you go, I don't think I can. I don't think I can hear you like kill that pil
Jump song. Do We've made love? So you're a no, that's no yea. I think that would probably if Cam had a.
Profile play guitar, everything would be guitar and here's.
I've got three guitars. How big my guitars? So you don't know what your ex are until you sort of get into it. It's so funny. The Joys stay married, listeners stay get on the apps, and any good stories reach out to me and share them. I was thinking that who's got the better gossip?
And you can clearly hear that Kath Mahoney has far the better gossip.
I've got, like, well, you did the fisting gloves you were like, you could use that in the book and the main character's parents could think they were washing up gloves. I was like, this is goal.
I know, I know, well, my imagination can can go to places for sure, especially when I know that you need content for your book.
It's like it gives me reason to sort of thing. I send you funny dog reels and you send me that.
I know, this is so true, this is so true. Well, well, how does single life from here look for you? Is it frustrating? Is it freeing?
Is it both?
I mean, you know, is there a five year plan or desire for you?
That what you want? I think I swing between. I am enough, you know, I am whole and oh my god, I really need a partner, like I really do sort of swing and I think that's the whole. You go on and off the app, you know, you just try and hope you might meet someone. Oh it's when you least expect it. If another one of my married friends says that to me, it will punch them in the face. So I do I swing between. I mean, I think
you and I talked about this before the show. Maybe it was after the show that I realized I really, as I said at the beginning of the chat, I kind of almost wanted that imaginary boyfriend that I didn't
have to put on an amazing fiftieth for me. And then I looked around, especially the first night, because the first night was so much full of you know, sort of friends and people I love, and I just went In the last ten years, I have been a single mum a lot, and I've been a single person, but all of these people, I just felt so loved and that love comes in different ways, and that sometimes, in fact, best friend love I think is almost like the love
that you have for a child. It's not like the love you have for your husband, because you might want to kill them sometimes, but with your friends, you tend to just love them heart. Yeah. So, and I still like a partner.
It's so true, and I think I don't know if it is again, it's just the preciousness of friendship as
we age as well is so important, you know. And I've spoken a lot about this going through perimenopause and menopause when I first got back from America, the depth of loneliness that I felt just for the physical changes that I was going through anyway, But so I think, you know, if you've got friends that you can and it doesn't even have to be a large group but if you've got friends that understand you and are supportive, it's just it's it.
Creates a whole Yeah, and judgment free and cheerleaders. Yeah, and people that you can that you have shared interest and love, you know, and just laughing. You cannot put a price on how how good you feel when you laugh, can you? Yeah? For sure.
I'm going to finish up with a few quick quick questions. Quick one one answers anything I say answered the first thing that comes to mind, which with you could go absolutely anywhere.
But this is like our rapid heartbeat kind of section.
Okay, okay, feeling hot and I already know the answer to a lot of these.
Okay, all right, morning, personal night out. Morning spanks or freedom as not like spanking, that's something different. No freedom, because I have to end up. I end up on degas. If I wear spanks, I get trapped wind Hey, I get there too. My tummy huts with I have to if I'm going to wear them, I have to take de gas and Buscapan. I came out of Chateau more Mom once with some famousy people, and I was a bit pissed and my bag opened and all of these de gas but like the paps were taking photos. I
was like, no, it's for wind. I was wind tablets, not drugs. And I had to go gas because they're American, aren't they. It's not it's gas like a I guess cut me out of these spanks. That's I never put that together. That makes sense. So I wear marks and spencers anddies that I pull over my tummy, but they pop under, Yeah, over under to just give up the role. It pulls down. What's your favorite comfort food when the hormones hit? Oh for oh god, that's I can't just
narrow that down. That's like picking one child. Just whatever I like to do, savory, then chocolate that I like to do. He's play. Then I might go to the ice cream, and then I might just hit Lewis's lunchbox and acts. It just depends how deep down the hole I've got.
Yeah, celebrity crush at twenty five versus now twenty five?
Who'd I fancy it? Twenty five?
No?
I can't. Yeah, Well, and your crush now is Tom Hardy, but also Harrison Ford. Harrison Ford. Actually, at any age I would have said, specifically in Star Wars's hand solo, I would have liked to have had sex with him, but then I also liked him all of the Patriot games where he was like, you know that kind of slightly bondie. But in shrinking, I'd also have sex with him because he's just so funny. Okay, and Clister Lockhart his partner, she's you know, youngish, yep, she is. I'd
bang Harrison. Okay, you know, I thought you're going to tell bang her. I would. I do love Tom Hardy, but because I really love his wife as an actress, I just feel I feel it dirty right saying about that that Tom. Now, plus after reading he's not that good in the knees and he's a bit achy. I was like, together though, I just be like, can you just rub me? Wears a whole water bottle? Tom, what's
your what's your most used emoji? Actually the magic, you know, like the magic and that's not the magic wand but like this it looks like a squirt magic. Yeah. Butterfly? Yeah, with you use a butterfly? Is there a pet peeve that instantly sends you over the edge? Oh my gosh. Yeah, when people cut you up and don't do the wave? Oh okay, yeah, yeah, when they're driving like I can, like like someone can nearly have risked my son and mine life. Then they do the wave and I'm like, fine,
I know, probs. Yeah, when they don't do the wave, I know it's so just like raise your hand, just raise your hand. That people that don't smile when I smile, it's centennial that pisses me off. Also, anyone that graffitis, especially like rot you know, like nature, if they graffiti nature or trees or rocks or how long have you got?
Was it just one a second? My pet peeves when you have to loan your front and in the pillow and put your bottom cheeks apart for them to either wax it or laser it, so you're like face down in the pillow with your hands spreading your bum cheeks. Hate. That's that's very specific. I've given you a plethora of that you have. I'm going to take all of them.
Is there one thing that you'd put on like a midlife survival kit it says something that you think women need to have it out.
Vibrator, vibrator, Yeah, tell us about that. A vibrator. Well, I my favorite one is called Libido. It's lbdo and she is an Australia. They're Australian made and it gets the reviews are like ten out of ten. And I always thought I would like an Innie, so like a you know, something that goes in you. Yes, and I get what some people don't. My friend Michelle was like, you've got to be specific about an idiot when I was telling her, and I was like, no, and this
is an Anie. And I didn't think i'd like an Honi.
Holy moly, Yeah, I know we've a lot about.
In fact, you are now an ambassador. An ambassador, they're amazing. But you can I can have an organism in forty five seconds. You can not with someone and they're probably going to take a bit longer. But just on my own I'm working from home, you can have loads. So it's great. Oh the joy of creative at home.
I love the fact that you loved it's so much that you like called them and you were like, this is the best I'm going to advertise you you get I've one out for free at your one woman's show.
He's going to support my shows. She just yeah, because it was just it's a game changer for the ladies who are living alone or who've got a husband. Yes. Anyway, last question, yes, is there's something that you.
I find this I'm asking you this question. I often find it really difficult myself to answer. But as a fifty year old, is there something that you wish you could go back and tell yourself as a thirty year old.
What I tell my thirty Yeah, I would just say, really enjoy your thirties, Really enjoy them, because you've got a cracking libidore. If you have a baby, they are like they're still a baby, because teenagers are not enjoyable all the time. Or see your parents that are at an age where they're kind of still young and can do so then but there's just my drama at thirty was just was not drama, you know. So yeah, I think I would just go back and go just enjoy it.
Just suck it up. It's wonderful. I mean, I'm loving my fifties. Yeah, but obviously, you know with every stage, things happened, isn't it. But yeah, in my thirties, what did you have to worry about? And I looked amazing and I wouldn't wear a bikini on the beach. I look back now and go id nothing on the beach if I look like right now we wear towels. Yeah, whilst.
Well, Katherine Mahoney, I'm excited for what you've got coming up. I know this book's going to be delightful. The one woman show. Oh my god, look out for her when when Kath does this. It's so great. You can follow Kath on Instagram on Katherine Mahoney in the middle blame my mum.
That's right, Yes, that's right.
But thank you so much for coming in so good. You're such a delight, You're always been, so thank you for coming in. And also just again like I just love this freedom of your the sex positive that how you're talking about this and sort of again just taking away the shame and the taboo of just talking.
About I'm being curious and playful. That's right. Yes, And at the end of this, you know, I might go back and just realize I really just like Vanilla, or I might you know, have a whole bag of tricks. Your researchers is benefiting many of us. Yes, thanks, thank you,