Hello, this is Tales of Recovery and another Podcast in the Car episode right here as I'm driving and wanting to remind you, I don't know if you, a lot of you guys may or may not be on Instagram, but there is a small ceremony, the only one that I'll be hosting this year in San Diego area coming up this Saturday, and we have a few spots open for coming in.
If you've been doing the work, if you are not taking SSRIs, if you've been wanting to alchemize some of the, you know, healing or therapy that you've been doing, or want to, you know, just explore and have fun with community, this is a great opportunity for a one-day retreat where we'll be doing some breathwork, meditation, walking in nature.
And, you know, the dream team, Lucas, Gloria, Sal, Jillian, Julio, and I are going to be there with live music, you know, walking everybody through this beautiful experience. Of course, it's not like a one-on-one superhero dose. This is a ceremony where we play and laugh and we're under the stars and we let the music take us in. It's a healing in community. It's a space for healing in community because most of the time we are, you know, there's so many things that get in the way of love.
And honestly, the biggest obstacle to quote-unquote healing or remembering your worth and allowing for, you know, life to flow through you is that we don't know how to sometimes give and receive love because of so much protection that we have. We have been protecting ourselves since, you know, the first scream or reaction from whatever caregiver, depending on your situation at home, depending on your life experience, all of us have so many covers, so many layers of protection.
And, well, they don't allow us to receive love 100%, a real, honest, true connection. Most of us have all these masks and we are, you know, sometimes hiding or pretending or acting really polite and everything's fine, I'm okay, without really opening up and letting somebody know that, you know, te está llevando la que te trajo, that you're just super intensely just... You can't deal with this anymore. And this disconnection is a brilliant, brilliant mechanism of the human design.
We wouldn't be able to make it if we didn't have these adaptations, these disconnections. But through these disconnections, we're bypassing some of the messages that are coming from the body.
So we don't really know how to connect to our gut anymore because you know for years and years and years i've been telling you don't cry don't laugh don't do this don't do that and even though you know that that's not right well you follow instructions and we follow because we need safety and it's not safe sometimes to explore and feel.
If we don't have a safety well we're going to die and so we're not going to survive And so when we're young, when we're growing and in different situations, we have to disconnect from the body in order to survive. If it's an intense situation, intense emotions, we have to disconnect. Disconnecting is what keeps us safe. life. And so it's like a survival mechanism to disassociate, to disconnect from the body, to disconnect from this gut feeling, this intuition.
And it might be a good thing to do when you're little and, you know, parents are screaming or you're getting bullied or abused, or you just, you sort of check out because it's too intense to be in your body. But as years go by and times go by, you know, you don't need that anymore. You have a choice now when you're an adult, but we live in the past. We live in the programming, quote unquote, of this nervous system disconnection of the body. And what psychedelics do is they reconnect to that.
Because if we don't reconnect, and it doesn't have to be just psychedelics, you can do this through somatic practices, yoga, embodied meditation, guided mindfulness practices of connecting to the emotions and sensations in the body. And of course, it's a lifelong practice. What the mushrooms do is they give you like a jumpstart of feeling and reconnecting and all of this wiring and firing in the brain goes into every muscle and fascia.
And it's just everything reconnects. You feel 50,000 emotions in two hours. And that's where the healing comes Because there's so many things that are getting resolved and you sort of reboot the system to be able to connect so that you can then listen to your intuition, your gut feeling. And let me give you an example of what it is to not listen to your gut feeling. Even if you are in therapy, recovery, yoga, everything that I was doing when I had my baby.
I had my children sleep with me, co-sleep with me. I nursed them for over a year. But I remember when my daughter was around maybe nine months old. She had been co-sleeping with us and I was super tired. This dumb ass lady came to tell me, oh, it's time for you to just let her cry it out because you're so tired and you just need to let her cry it out. And I was really tired staying up at night with her and then having to work. I kind of wish I hadn't worked.
I don't recommend working if you have babies. Find a way to do it from home. And so I said, okay, I'm going to do what they're saying because this is what they're saying, right? And I let her cry it out at night. And it was so fucking brutal. I remember Lulu and I standing at the door just like, oh my God, holding each other and just like, this is horrible. I mean, the gut feeling was, this is stupid. What the fuck are you doing letting that baby cry?
The gut feeling was, go pick that baby up and she's sleeping with you and you'll be tired till you're not. But I bypassed my feelings, my intuition, my language, the language of my body, I bypassed it because of the shoulds, because of what society and culture was saying, because of what this dumb ass lady and the doctor had told me. That's how crazy this is. Your body's brawling around and you just don't want to do things.
Oh my God, I can't. This is so fun. I can't go to the family, but you pull up your boosters and you show up to that goddamn family dinner where you just have to have a drink or two because it's the only way through. Instead of checking in and saying, you know, there's been a lot of craziness in this family. And honestly, I don't feel like I'm going to go over this thing. I'm going to stay home and unrest and people can deal with it.
But we bypass these sensations. We bypass when some weirdo comes in and you're like, oh, this is kind of creepy, but I better be polite. There's a lot of things that are happening. And those are like somewhat obvious ones. But beyond that, the subconscious, the beliefs that we create because of this survival mechanisms, these adaptations of disconnecting to the body are running the show. And we make up ideas about out with should and shouldn't be because we just are not connected to the body.
And the body keeps the score and sooner or later we're going to get sick or we're drinking too much or eating too much and gaining the weight and, you know, losing our mind or going on this velocity that's just, you know, this low level anxiety that we think is normal. And so meditation is a beautiful practice for this and inquiring into what is going on. How can I help my body calm down and soothe? But there's got to be these resolving of these emotions.
Not all at once, but when we start resolving these emotions or feeling them or checking into, oh, I remember when we were in this big car accident or when my brother fell off the cliff and almost died and I was just devastated, but nobody came to hug me or tell me if I was okay. I was all alone and I felt so alone and It was just so heavy.
And then you carry this heaviness for the rest of your life, thinking that it's just your job or something else, when in reality, it's a memory that got imprinted in you since you were eight years old.
And so these magical mushrooms, you know, what the hell are we doing in this planet that has these plants, these peyote, these mushrooms, these medicines that rewire the brain to show you that there's a different way to live, to heal you, you to reset these responses in a way that now you have an opportunity with this neuroplasticity to rethink things through, to tell yourself that you're going to live a different way,
to offer yourself a freedom, a liberation of being calm and centered and collected inside of your body, even when the shit is hitting the fan, to be able to live a life without pretending, without a mask, to set healthy boundaries and not feel bad about it. To be able to say, no, I'm not going to this or I'm sorry. You can't come to that without immediately thinking, oh, my God,
oh, my God. Should I have said that? Should I have said that? No. Those are the adaptations of wanting to fit in and belong when you were little. But if you're an adult, you can choose now. As long as you're not hurting yourself or anybody, you get to choose now. And it's easier said than done because you can think it in the brain. But the body has a different training. And the body has been bypassing and separating and disconnecting for so long. That's why it gets so tired.
That's why it gets tired and wants to just chill and watch Netflix fix and eat a bunch of chocolate. That's why it's like, oh, I can't take it anymore. Give me the wine at night. Oh, this is too intense. Give me the pill. Because the body is tired of us not paying attention to it, of us not knowing that we have this opportunity to reconnect. It's almost like we are in this amazing jaguar bodies, like we're these stallions.
But we don't know how to how to ride the horse or how to be inside the jaguar because the information isn't going through there's like a big disconnect from the head all right underneath the head from the neck all the way down to the toes there's just disconnect yes you can walk yes you can do things but i mean some of us have you know like like you have a tick or you can't stop biting your nails Oh, you always have stomach issues. You're having a hard time falling
asleep. You know, there's so many things that the body's telling us. And we're thinking that, well, maybe if I take an allergy pill, maybe if I go to the doctor, maybe if I do something there. Instead of maybe, what if I listen? What is my body telling me? You know, what is it wanting to do when your hands are tightly gripping the wheel? when you wake up with your jaw all super tight because you have to wear a mouth guard? Where's that anger coming from? Where's that grief coming from?
There are so many messages that we're completely unaware of. And how do we bring awareness to them? You can study about it. You can read the book. You can really be mindful of what's happening in your body. Checking in three or four times a day. How deep or how shallow are your breaths? How tense are your shoulders are they all the way up to your ears are they soft is your belly soft is your body fighting in flight you know it's in fight or flight or is a present open aware.
Allowing the flow of life to go through and creativity coming in joy and so the mushrooms, are this beautiful assistance like this this help to activate this connection inside of us they're not going to do all the work we have to do it, we have to give it.
To continue with it. We have to continue meditating and integrating and getting curious and journaling and doing, you know, going, being out in nature and listening, listening to the silence, listening to the inside, because all of the answers are inside, of course. And as you are listening, we begin to trust that gut connection that we have. You know, this gut connection is so important. We die if we don't have it. You know, it's like the way we were designed.
If you had to be always aware, always aware of your surroundings. Otherwise, you know, you were going to get eaten by a lion or you would lose your tribe and then you'd be all alone. And of course, all alone, you're vulnerable. So you always had to be connected, aware of what was coming up, a snake, a bug, an animal, whatever, always, always, always. And so it's vital for us to be connected to our gut, to all of our senses.
And this part of us that disconnects from it is a survival adaptation because now we're not out trying to survive the snakes and a big bear coming to eat you. Now we're out here freaking out because our caregivers are drinking or neurotic or screaming or school isn't safe or you're told that you have some special need and now you don't think. So you're just like, I can't. You disconnect.
Plus all the other messages, right? About don't do this, don't do this, don't feel, don't laugh, blah, blah, blah. So reconnecting is one of the keys to becoming embodied, to becoming, you know, to having full body sovereignty. That you can say no when you want to say no, and you can say yes when you want to say yes, and have it your way, and not do things that you don't want to do, and bypass what your body's telling you. No more of that. No more violence. Because that's violence, really.
You're acting, thing, you know, it's an act of violence towards yourself to go hang out with this person that you absolutely hate just because you want to be polite or to do a specific job that you just don't want to do anymore. Because we all have choices. Some of them take a little bit of planning and work, yes, but there's a choice in there, in your adult self.
When we believe that there's absolutely no choice, this is never going to end, and it's so-and-so's fault, you're in little child mode. That's your little kid in there. That language, those words are from a little kid that is trapped and doesn't have the capacity to get in the car and drive away. Because you're five years old. But you know, if you're 19, 20, 21, 30, 40, 50, 60, you have a choice now. You have a choice.
And it's not, you know, it's not, it's not very easy. We have to develop again, this connection, this choice. And when you're in a group, when we're in a group like these retreats that we host, and you're sitting around circle with 15, 20 other people, and we're We're doing active listening and connecting and being vulnerable, you realize, oh, I'm not the only one that forgot about my choice, about my birthright.
I'm not the only one that has disconnected in order to survive and that is struggling to reconnect because I'm afraid to feel because I'm scared of the pain. And what these circles, these meditations, these community gatherings give us is that space to see that we're not alone. And that if I can share this and that person over there is listening to me without judgment and I can hear them without judgment, I realize we're all the same in lakish.
I am you and you are me. And this unison, this connection is also what the mycelium and the psilocybin gives you. You become one with the universe. You become one with the earth. You become one with the person next to you, with yourself, with everything. And then when you integrate this, afterwards in circle and sharing, oh, I mean, just the insight that you receive is very powerful.
And we meet a week later for integration again. You can continue to do mindfulness magic or meditation practices or integrate with whoever you want. But the power of a group, a curated group. People in these experiences with the frequency of the music and the voice of those that have been doing this for a long time and are not scared of intensity because they know that we're capable of it, of being with it, and of staying calm and soothing the other through it.
It's a very beautiful thing. It's a very powerful, very powerful healing experience. I know this isn't for everybody, but if you're listening to this and you've been waiting to decide, you know, I don't know, maybe that, because I know I get so many emails, so many messages, so many texts, when is the next one? When is the next one? And I had said in the beginning of the year that I, you know, now I'm going to take the whole year off because my dad died and it's too intense.
And, but you know, my dad died, but I'm in the land of the living. And I think six months has been pretty good, a good time of resting. And I had a beautiful experience in the ceremony where I went and sat and I realized, this is so beautiful. And oh my goodness, the musicians that we work with and. You know, these friends that allow us to come into their land that is full of trees and open space and animals and just beauty.
What a gift. What a gift. And so these opportunities, I'm taking them. I am taking them. And this is an offering. We have a few spots left. But if you're listening to this and you want to join this Saturday, July 6th, you probably have my email or my webpage or a DM and Instagram. Grisalves.com send a message and we'll see if this is a good fit for you.
And yeah thank you for listening, and may you be well may we all remember that even though we all have from and we all have been through you know where the world is kind of we all have the capacity to heal healing is available to everyone, and the more we do this on our own then we can create spaces for others and we grow Grow the community of people that are making choices that are good for the earth, good for each other, good for our children and our villages,
and getting out of these crazy-ass systems that don't want us to be free. There's a reason they don't want you to be free. There's a reason that you're scared about these things. Look into it. Nobody's scared about getting super drunk. That's like, whatever, it's legal.
So you know that's another thing to get curious about why why am i scared of this why isn't people are saying it's the medicine of the future because it's so amazing well it's the medicine of the past might be of the future now that you know all the research is coming out and there's too many avenues of information for people to continue to ignore it and be blinded by this, propaganda. So yeah, there it is for y'all. Tales of Recovery, this is Gris, and I will see you soon.