The Enterprise crew is excited to meet the mythical Aldeans until they propose a classic "children for information" exchange, but when Commander Riker balks at the deal they take some kids anyway. This is a real problem for Captain Picard, because Wesley (the boy?) is among their victims. Why'd the Aldeans take only the white kids? How long can Picard go without Wesley? Didn't we already fix the ozone layer? It's the episode where there's no calculus allowed!
Mar 21, 2016•42 min•Ep. 16
Admiral Mark Jameson has one last job before he gets out of the Federation for good: negotiate the rescue of some hostages from his arch enemy. Jameson's just got one problem: he's weighed down by tons of silly putty that's been troweled onto his face. Fortunately, an alien de-aging drug has him getting younger (and sweatier) by the minute. Will the despotic Karnas believe that Jameson is who he claims to be? Can Picard and the crew ever trust Starfleet if their top brass is made of melting stra...
Mar 16, 2016•44 min•Ep. 15
When the Enterprise pulls into a starbase for some maintenance, the Bynars are there to help with some Holodeck upgrades - which Commander Riker is all too keen to experience first hand. Unfortunately, Captain Picard crashes his party, and it turns out three is too many for Riker's 'bone. Meanwhile, the Bynars have taken the ship on a test drive back to their homeworld, with Picard and Riker becoming accidental stowaways. Will we ever know what's in the weapon's room? Why isn't it harder to set ...
Mar 14, 2016•42 min•Ep. 14
Riker never had it so good when he and the away team arrive on Angel One, a planet of statuesque babes and feeble mini-men who could never fight in his weight class. But trouble is brewing as a handful of Federation citizens have shacked up with the local gals, putting Picard in a tough position as far as the Prime Directive is concerned. Speaking of positions, Riker is going through his repertoire with Sarah Connor, the smoldering demagogue that runs the whole planet. Will Wesley (the boy) get ...
Mar 09, 2016•33 min•Ep. 13
When the away team beams down to the charred ruins of a desolate planet, they find body parts strewn everywhere that end up belonging to Data's twin brother, Lore. After assembling him they find out that like all pairs of twins, one is good and one is evil. But after giving Lore the full, unsupervised run of his ship, Picard is most concerned with Data's loyalty. The crew needs to figure out whose side he's on fast, because there's a glass pinecone that is bent on destroying the ship. Will Tasha...
Mar 07, 2016•31 min•Ep. 12
When Captain Picard has a big linguistics test to study for, he decides to procrastinate in the holodeck instead. Disappointing everyone, he chooses a program about a 1940's-era private detective, so Data, Dr. Crusher, and a random crew member join him. Turns out, there's a malfunction and people in the holodeck aren't shooting blanks anymore, which would be a real problem if Picard had been able to get Beverly up on his desk like he wanted to. Will the Enterprise ever fix the door problem? What...
Mar 02, 2016•31 min•Ep. 11
When Wyatt (the guy from the music video for "Take On Me") beams aboard the Enterprise to marry Counselor Troi, Commander Riker realizes that he won't "be gone in a day," and it really puts him in a foul mood. It doesn't help that Troi's mother is getting into people's heads, and the combination of Wyatt's creepy Glamour Shots-style drawings and the arrival of an alien ship mean that the wedding plans are off the rails in a hurry. What is "80's hot" anyway? Does big hair qualify as formal attire...
Feb 29, 2016•36 min•Ep. 10
When Q returns to amuse himself with the Enterprise crew, all hell breaks loose when he gives Riker his powers. Why doesn't Riker immediately return to Rubicun III to make himself god of the Edo? Why does Geordi have to be so damn creepy? What is Worf's idea of sex, anyway? And finally, we do something with our episode vetoes.
Feb 24, 2016•30 min•Ep. 9
When Captain Picard abandons a perfectly good ship full of Pelican cases, the Ferengi are nice enough to return it to him. Meanwhile, he's reminded of an old crime (which has nothing to do with Wesley), and gets a massive headache in the process. Finally, we introduce the "Picosby," and nothing is ever the same. Be sure to listen all the way to the end for a brand new listener-submitted Drunk Shimoda song!
Feb 22, 2016•31 min•Ep. 8
When the crew takes shore leave on a planet inhabited entirely by late night Cinemax adult movie stars, it appears to be a bouncy, floppy paradise for the away team. Too bad Wesley (the boy?) learns the hard way about how much these people care about landscaping. It's an episode that leaves almost nothing to the imagination!
Feb 17, 2016•35 min•Ep. 7
When Worf gets shocked working on an electrical panel, he learns a hard lesson about what happens when you try to do a union guy's job. Meanwhile, a bunch of Cantina Aliens are exploiting the "no door locks" policy on the Enterprise. Later, Data takes up smoking a pipe, and Picard demonstrates the advantages of backing up his information into the cloud. Endings don't get more abrupt, especially for Engineer Singh.
Feb 15, 2016•27 min•Ep. 6
When the Enterprise crew throws the keys to the ship to The Traveler, he drives it farther out than its ever been before. That is not cool to Captain Picard, who wants to go home immediately. That bit of engineering would be a whole lot easier for The Traveler if he didn't also have lobster-hands. Finally, Ben makes an embarrassing admission about his relationship to Wesley that could change our view of him forever. It's the episode where we finally realize our potential as the two Beethovens of...
Feb 10, 2016•35 min•Ep. 5
The Ferengi do an e-brake slide into the series (and into our hearts) after the show finally adds to the alien facial putty budget. Meanwhile Riker, having just read The Art of War, will not shut up about it. And when he grabs some alone time on the planet's surface, it becomes clear that the planet is attracted to all sources of power...even his. It's an episode where we've finally achieved "podcast mastery"!
Feb 08, 2016•25 min•Ep. 4
Tasha Yar inadvertently breaks up a happy marriage, then gets into a UFC-style fight to the death with "the other woman." If that story isn't intriguing enough, it's also terribly racist! Also, why is everyone okay with kidnapping? Where is Worf? Finally, we discuss names for a website we don't need or want.
Feb 05, 2016•38 min•Ep. 3
The Enterprise crew gets "space drunk" while young Wesley Crusher's science experiment traps him and Assistant Chief Engineer Shimoda inside Engineering. Will the crew stop boning each other long enough to save the ship? Is the "scarf economy" real? Why hasn't this show been cancelled yet? All these topics, and more, on The Greatest Generation.
Feb 01, 2016•34 min•Ep. 2
Our premier episode as we set out on our journey to watch every episode of Star Trek The Next Generation.
Jan 25, 2016•28 min•Ep. 1
