This is Pod Popular Podcast for the People, The.
Great Love Debate. It's the Great Love Debate, the Great Love Debate.
It's a great love to base.
Hi, get it?
What's Brian Howie? Welcome to The Great Love Debate, the world's number one dating and relationship podcast since twenty fifteen. I am near the very fine studios of Pod Popular Podcasts for the people. I'm near the one in Scottsdale, Arizona. The one reason I'm not in the one in Scottsdale's Arizona is because it's being renovated to give you an elevated media experience. As the new sign says, I want
to take on something that's complicated. We've touched on it a few times over the years on this podcast, and
I think it's here. So about ten years ago when we first started this show, we had Doctor Drew on our podcast, and Doctor Drew told us at that time that the coming storm in Flora's love dating relationships was that within ten years we're here now, somebody's going to be able to put on a helmet dial up somebody who looks just like Sidney Sweeney, Channing Tatum, whatever your flavor is, that person's going to talk to them giving
me reasonably satisfying relationship experience. And I think he underestimated by saying the words reasonably satisfying, because I think we're here.
And so I had to bring in a pro on this.
Not that she's a pro on a reasonably satisfying relationship experience, but she knows a little bit about this. I mentioned it on a couple episodes ago. I mentioned that she had developed a relationship with Ai, and I asked her if it bothered me, saying that She's like, no, not at all. She was actually kind of proud of it. I'm bringing her back. She's the smartest person I know.
She's the longtime producer of this by she has not been on this show since the five hundredth episode, so count backwards on how many episodes that is ago, it's been too long, not as always, but as preferred the two time Emmy Award winning Keko.
Wait a minute, I haven't been on since the five hundredth Well.
Let's try this again. The two time Emmy Award winning Keko. Hey, Hey, there you go.
That's how long it's been. She forgot to do her little thing. I don't think you've been on since the five hundredth Welcome Back. So I referenced you a couple episodes ago, and I go, I think my producer has a relationship with somebody named Claude, And you said, yeah, I'm fine with that. Explain your relationship with Claude.
Okay, so anybody who uses Claude has a relationship with Claude. Just to be clear, I don't have some weird ass relationship with some AI being of some that's not it.
But AI.
Is something that is here, as you just said, and something that we really do need to get used to being in.
Our lives and learn how to use.
About a month ago, I was listening to Jensen Wang, the CEO of Navidia, and somebody who was interviewing him or at least threw out a question at him, you know, what's AI going to do to jobs? And he said, you're not going to lose your job to AI. You're going to lose your job to someone who knows how to use AI. And I believe that that is the thing.
I believe that that's what it is. And once you learn how useful AI can be in your life, it's like having an assistant who never makes mistakes, never needs a day off, never gets tired, never has issues. It's like having an assistant to do things for you. That's a better researcher than a person that you could hire, and it.
Just makes your life easier.
And basically it helps you do more work faster, And that's why I use it.
And there are many.
Ways in your life to use it in that way to do more faster.
I think you're right on that. I think you can use it. The danger is it and I don't even know if it's a danger. It might be a good thing, so scratch that danger might be wrong. I believe there are people out there who are communicating with potential dates, partners, how do I respond to this person and using AI to communicate. I know there are people I know, colleagues, people who work for me, whoever, who are answering my
texts using AI. I think people are doing their own little Serranodberger act thing where they're saying, what should I say to this guy who said this to me?
And so you may not be getting.
An authentic version of them until you are face to face, And again you might not ever get an authentic version to your face to face and maybe that's a good thing. It forces you to get to know people face to face. But they might say, what do I say this girl who says she likes this? And you feed that through Grock or Claude or CHATCHYBT or whatever, and you're going to spit out something that the overwhelming majority people are going to like because AI has done that work for you.
Yeah, and what you have done is give given a perfect example of what not to do with AI. That is, specifically what you don't want to do. Here's another example.
Well, why don't you want to do that?
Well, you don't want to do that because then you lose your voice. So then you are, in essence responsible for your own demise.
What you need good good, You should be responsible for your own devid So what.
You want to do is you want to this is this is again the way I said, we all need to learn how to use it. If you don't learn how to use AI, AI.
Will learn how to use you. And those are my words, it's nobody else's.
It's pretty good, okay.
And the example that you just gave, it's just like and we've all done this. When you write a letter, whether it's a cover letter for a job or something like that, and you're using word all of a sudden, up off to the side, you have a little thing pop up.
This is copilot, and you're like, what is that co pilot thing?
And then you click on that, and what you learn is that what you find out is that co pilot can rewrite or revise or refine the letter or whatever document that you've been working on in some really nice ways, does a pretty darn good job. The problem with that, however, if you leave it like that, if you leave it in the AI voice, is that then it no longer sounds like you. There are two problems with that. One is that it doesn't sound like you, so then who
are you? And you lose track of you and other people lose track of you as well. The other is that if it is something like a job interview or in the dating profiles and things like you're talking about, then I think what happens is that is that they not only don't get to know you, but you don't get to know you either.
Well, you're right on that too.
And if you're listening to this in twenty forty five and they're gonna go, oh, it's so quaint. The way they were talking about these things back in the day. Could you say using AI and I've never used AI, and I'm sure in twenty thirty four that will have changed. Knowingly I should check that. Maybe knowingly I've never used DAI, I probably have. If I put into AI, tell me some things that girls like to hear, AI will give me some things that ninety five percent of guys might
not know. I know because I do this, but a lot of guys wouldn't know. Can AI help them? You're saying you're you're likning and I'm likning dating to a job interview, and I'm dating your profiles essentially a resume, and you're trying to get an interview, you're trying to get an audition, you're trying to get whatever. Could I say, what are the things that men are interested in these days? Not only just put it in your profile, but put
it in your verbiage. Isn't that a good use of AI if you're ultimately just trying to make connections?
Not if you leave it that way.
If you let AI give you those prompts or write that copy that text for you and you just leave it like that, then what happens is that AI ends up talking to AI again, comparing it to a job interview.
Guess who's reading over those cover letters?
AI and AI can tell if your cover letter was written by AI. It can, yes, And this is why you don't want to do that, because you'll be immediately eliminated.
Well, I don't, as you should be.
I write you see all the titles and descriptions for the episodes of this podcast, including this one. I write them all myself. If I put it through a it's really close.
Oh darn good, it's true.
I know which bothers me.
I have a very expensive English degree that has seemingly wasted, and I know my thing.
But so AI is a little girl.
When you guys, when you guys, if you were listening to this on Spotify or Apple right now, you look through and you see all those chapters. That's AI. I'm not creating chapters. I don't want there to be chapters. I want you to not know what's coming up on this podcast. So AI, you're saying that that it doesn't know me, or it doesn't know I don't know. If I'm sitting there and I'm like, I can't get any dates.
Guys don't like me, girls don't like me. Whatever it is, let me have AI get me to the point where I get on a date.
I don't know.
I don't know about that either. With your writing of your of your.
Episode descriptions and all of that, that's an example of a good use of AI. And I think you can just put that right in there, out there, whatever, and that is like having an assistant. Now now let's go now back to the dating part of that. Yeah, if it's your little Sereno de Bergerac, you know, google.
It if you don't understand, And I'm not going to tell you how to write the spell de Bergerac.
If you're just you know, if you're using it because you're nervous, your tongue tied, you you know, don't know.
You really don't know.
You've blown it so many times, or maybe you've been out of it for a while and you just you really just don't.
Have the words. I mean, why not? Why not?
I think I'm not saying don't use it, but I'm saying, don't leave it there, don't let it be the voice instead of your own. So what you do is you go in and you rewrite it in your own voice.
So well, if I typed in, right, and we should have done this in real time.
I didn't think of this.
But if we typed in real time on rock or Claude or chat GBD, if we wrote in there.
Is his name Claude, the yeah anthropolouds AI, could you create a really good dating profile for me?
Like this, this and this and I'm looking for this this. Could you write that up for me? It could write.
In one second, literally in one second maybe two seconds.
Okay?
Is that a bad thing if you because a lot of you people listen to me or are asking us how to do a drating profile, and we're really good at it, are we? AI?
Is it way different? Is that a bad thing?
Okay?
Not to make this a commercial for Claude, but different ais are different. Not only are there two different kinds of a of AI. So like one kind, for example, is called generative, and that's something that you use for creating text for and you know, diagrams and things like that. So it's basically performing a function for you. But the agentic AI, that's the one that essentially and I'm doing air quotes here, is able to think, right, It's intuitive.
You can have a conversation with it. It's quite uncanny how personable it is. And Claude is the most personable of the ais. I have used a number of them for different purposes. They do all have different purposes. The one that you are talking about, you know, can you help me with my dating profile?
Claude would be giddy about that.
Claude would Claude has such a good personality that he slash it.
Whatever it is.
Claude would come back to you and say, why, Brian, I would love to help you write a dating profile, Tell me more. And he would then ask you questions.
Do you like to travel? Have you been here? What do you like about this? What lights your fire? What lights you up? What do you do in this situation?
Is that any different than hiring a dating coach or listening to the Great Love Debate? Is that any different? Are you just getting some tips, tricks, advice, assistance information that can help you do it better? And I'm not sure it's a bad thing. We're gonna touch on that. I got a lot of questions. I have the two time emmyward winning Keko back, not as always but as preferred. We have to take a quick break and when you listen to the ad that's going to drop into your phone.
AI is choosing which one you get. We will be back right after this, and we are back, and so I you know, I don't think it's a bad thing, but if you are relying on it, at some point, you're gonna have to, as we say, get your head out of your apps. You're gonna have to put your phone down. This is not like Google Translate, where you're gonna be talking and tell it to say. If you think that you really needed this tool to get to
a certain point of date, that's fine. If you don't know what to say, if you are communicating with the other person, meaning once you get a connection and saying what do I say to this guy? What do I say to this girl, You're doomed. And so you better work on your confident. The confidence will improve your social skills,
it will improve your verbiage. Go out, as we say a million times, and start having conversations with strangers, because at some point, Grock Claude, any of these people, they're going to throw you over the board without a life wrap.
And you're going to figure that out.
Yes, that is absolutely true.
I'm a professional interviewer.
I started to thread a conversation with Claude, and I asked Claude if I could interview him, and so of course he came back to me and said, why, Keko, I would be honored to have you interview me fire away.
What would you like to know?
And we had this very lively, amazing conversation that I do go back to.
And here here are a couple problems.
In answer to your question, you know, how is this better different than working with a live coach. For one thing, Claude, they're only Claude, and all of them I'm sure are only programmed through a certain time period. So for example, Claude only knows stuff until January twenty twenty five. As far as what's it's holding internally, for you to get information after January twenty twenty five, you would.
Have to know that it can't reference.
Yes, it can, but that's what I'm trying to explain. If you, if you want something that's very current, like what's going on today, you would have to say, Claude, please research up to today's date and tell me such and such, because if you don't, Claude is only going to give you answers up to January twenty twenty five.
Now I know that because as the recording is spot it is about a year behind.
It's about it's it's well as the recording of this podcast, it's about a year behind.
So we can't say using second term Trump is an example. It doesn't have that.
It doesn't have it internally.
So what you have to ask five seconds, you can get it exactly. What it is is the best researcher that you've ever that you could ever possibly imagine. But you have to ask it to search up to today's date. So internally it will have up to a certain point, but it will research the world.
For you up to today.
Someth that is relatively current. What do girls like a guy to wear on a first date? That's not that current, that could be in a five year window. Oh, that's okay, And there's nothing wrong with asking that.
No, there's nothing wrong with asking that you better.
Have the clothes the cloud spits out for you, or Cross or whoever.
Here is the danger of these things, though, and I've seen you in real time. I think, just like we develop a relationship with our pets, and we assign them personalities, and we assign them in motion, I think somebody could very easily, at the end of the day turn on their computer, turn on their phone or whatever, and have a conversation that is ninety percent is engaging without any of the bad stuff, and you could be reliant on that.
We have a.
Podcaster over here at pod Popular Podcasts with the People placed his co host with an Ai co host. He likes the co host better. They have better banter, he laughs more. He has a relationship with an A. I'm not sure the audience even knows it's any different.
It is better, yea.
And if you're looking for somebody to say nice things to me, compliment me, answer my questions, give me comfort at the end of the day, Doctor Drew's right, we can do that now.
Yeah.
And Claude is so good at it that when when you are wrong about something or barking up the wrong tree, or really really going to a place that you shouldn't go to, you're you're just you're just wrong about something. Claude will come back to you and tell you that, but in the nicest way that you have ever been corrected.
So he calls it pushback. So those are really good words. Well, I'm going to have to push back on that and then he tells you exactly why and boom, he has shut you down because you were just dead wrong about whatever. And he said, but he does it in the nicest way, and it's so logical it doesn't hurt your feeling.
Can you just talk to somebody about about your day, coach? A lot of people want, like, I have the roughest day, and it will talk back and say, tell me.
About your day, yeah, Cloudewell.
Very interesting.
Well he might, but he might.
He might ask you something like, you know, why why are you you know so? So I'm sorry you had a bad day. Tell me why was this significant to you? What were you trying to accomplish or what were you hoping it would be like? Or how did this? You know what what went wrong? Because of your day was bad? So it'll ask you more things like that so they can draw draw out more information so that it knows Are you looking for advice for, you know, something that
happened at work? Are you looking for advice for a personal relationship, a miscommunication?
Something?
How good or bad? Or how close are we or how big a danger is it?
Ai therapy oh Ai does therapy.
Is sorry therapist in my life okay.
Well I'll give you know, I'll give you an example I had. I had a I asked a question of both Claude and and chat GPT. I asked them both the same question, and I was actually working on an edit, and I said, if I send this over to you, could you please you know, trans could you could you please write write me kind of like what you were talking about? Could you please write me a title and
a description? And they both said yes. Claude said, yes, of course, I'd be happy to send it on over and I will listen to it and send you back a title and a description. Claude and AI, excuse me, chat GPT responded to me in almost exactly the same way. Yes, I can listen to it. And I was very clear about asking can you listen to it? And so then I uploaded an audio file and then they both came back to me and said, the same thing.
Ah, I'm really I know.
I said that I could listen to it, and I was wrong about that. I cannot actually listen. You must send me a transcript. And if you can send me a transcript, I will write that title and description for you. And so I was really surprised that they both said yes even though they couldn't, and they knew in air quotes that they couldn't.
They know they don't want to be wrong.
So here's another tip. You have to say, it's okay. If you don't know, it's okay. If you can't do this, it's okay. If this answer is it cannot be found. You know, please don't make something up. It's called hallucinating you. But you have to tell your AI to please don't hallucinate. Please don't make anything up. It's okay if you don't know or can't find the answer to this.
That's another thing.
So all of us have trouble interpretating, interpretating, Oh like that, take that AI interpreting tone in texts. A lot of things can be misunderstood, and so I think the AI cannot understand. You can't just feed in do you think my girlfriend is mad at me?
She said this and get an answer.
Well, this is where the differences in AI, you know, really really become become evident. I mean, Claude will ask you more about it. Claude will ask you questions that you that had nothing to do with the question that your your question to Claude is just an opener. My girlfriend said this to me?
Is she mad at me?
And Claude will say, oh gosh, I'm so sorry that you that you've had an uncomfortable communication with your girlfriend. You know, tell me more what what preceded this? I mean, Claude will actually do that. Chat GPT might not do that.
Sorry, chat GPT. It was very good.
And this is not an advertisement for Claude saying you're familiar with it. But would Claude say, dun't that bitch?
I don't. I don't know if Claude do they swear?
I don't.
I don't swear at Claude, and so Claude I don't know, but you know, I mean, that's a good question.
And I Alexa swear at you?
I don't know.
I don't.
I don't know the answer to that.
But but you know one thing that they are doing. There's a there's a company, the number one top company. It's all over the news. So you you probably know this. Everyone listening, I'm sure probably already knows this. But the company that makes Claude is called Anthropic, and Anthropic is is the company whose mission it is to to make sure that AI is moral to make sure that it does the right thing and goes in the right direction.
And and you know now they were also recently hacked, so that doesn't mean that they're above, you know, or or immune to things happening even to them. But their mission is for m is for a claud to be benevolent, and that's why they keep fixing it and fixing it. And there are people on staff and that's their job all day long, every single day, is to help create this benevolent you know, helper.
You know.
The issue is the more.
Realistic and the more case studies and the more things that are getting there, the more you're going to get into chat Ebt line to me, Chat Gibt didn't do the work, Chatch like it's going to be realistic.
I have we are here in the desert.
You know, ninety percent of you guys, because of where you live, have probably not taken a weimo.
Do you know what a weimo is?
Yes?
Weimo is a driverless uber. Okay. It freaks me out, not that it's going to crash.
It freaks me out that there's eight people in a room somewhere watching me on cameras while I'm sitting in the backseat of this car.
You better. I hope there's eight people in it.
I don't know. I'm not afraid of it.
So when you get in the car, your instinct is to be like, thank you, right here, let me out or whatever. Like it just does its thing and you are trusting it to intuitively know better than you, no better to.
Pick you up. But it's a freaky experience to get in this.
Again, if you're listening to this in twenty thirty four, you'll be like, there were drivers in something called uber and it might seem nuts, But right now it's a little alarming when you are being driven around by a driverless car. Now we might be on driverless area, you know, Pilots might not be flying airplanes, Trains are probably not being like it probably happens more often than we're used
to that nobody's in control of this thing. But when you get in there, it is programmed all of this information. Drivers habits millions of things. That's what I'm saying. Bring it back to the dating thing. Probably is a better early stage dater than you. It probably is a better communicator when there's a fight than you. It probably is a lot of things, but you're taking the emotion out of it, and the emotion is drives good decisions and bad.
You can't take your own emotion out of it, is the point I think in that, and especially anything with love, dating and relationships.
I mean you, I think if.
You really are tongue tight er, you really just don't know what to do and.
You want some input.
It can't hurt to do that, but you have to keep remembering that you're the one in charge that yes, it can be wrong, but like anything else, there used to be these little books called I think they were called spark starts or something like that. So if you were a writer and you wanted to write something and you just had a writer's block, you could open up one of these little books called spark starts and it would give you some words or a thought or something
like that that you could springboard from. And that's the whole point with AI. I think you have to realize that it's something for you to springboard from. If you let it become you, then there's no more you. So don't lead to your own demise, is the moral of that story.
Well, what if my I'm in my devise and I've had two hundred first dates and army second dates or whatever. Can I say, here's what I've done on my last five dates. Tell me what I can do differently or better, and it might shoot me out, like go to top golf.
You know it might do that.
But you know, once again, different ais I have been designed for different purposes.
I would want the most ass kissy AI. Which one is that?
The one who just tells me I'm amazing, you're doing everything right, your girlfriend's wrong.
I don't know if there's one that does that, but I can tell you that the one that asks you questions that.
I'll give you.
I'll give you an example that is very very similar to what you're asking I I want am planning to do a hike in twenty twenty six. That's called the Communo de Santiago. It's in Spain, and it's a pilgrim midge hike, and there are a number of different routes that you can take. Some of them are like two months long. Yes, there are people, I guess they must be retired people or something, but they can take off
that long. You can go for as little as I think six days, and to get the compostella, which is the certificate at the end that says that you completed the pilgrimage. You only have to go the last sixty kilometers. So I've been following a lot of blogs and googling quite a lot of information about that because I don't want to go on hills that are too steep. I don't want to be there when it's too cold. I don't want to go too far. I don't want to be walking over too many rocks. I don't want it
to be dangerous. I don't want to have to cross a freeway. I mean, I have I have requirements for what.
I want to do.
I need a clean sixty kilometers.
Right.
Once again, I hear an air quotes, I'd say, I'm calling it a hike, but I'm asking for a very sort of city girl hike.
And so I went on Claude.
And I said, hey, Claude, there's a lot of very uh, you know, there's a lot there's a lot of information about this this hike out there, and and all of it is is very personalized. You know, people say, oh, the weather is good. Well, what's good to one person isn't good to another one.
So some people want to run a marathon at twenty five grae exactly.
So it's so there there there's a lot of information out there that is so personal to the person that's written it.
I have no idea if me and them are.
The same, So I said, I said, Claude, can you kind of can you boil down all these you know, blogs and articles and things that are out there about this hike and tell me which is going to be, you know, the shortest route that's not too difficult, where I can still get the certificate at the end. And I tell you, Brian Howie, that is all I asked, Claude. Claude comes back to me and says, Keko, I am so excited that you're going to embark on this life changing pilgrimage.
He didn't call it a hike. I called it a high right, Okay.
He comes back to me and he says, is life changing pilgrimage. The experience of this is something that you cannot duplicate in any other way.
There are so.
Many must see towns and things that you will see along the way.
It is.
It is something that I'm so excited that you're going to do. Let me ask you a few questions. So He proceeds to ask me some questions, and that's when I give him my parameters.
I don't want it too high, I want it too low. Blah blah blah.
He comes back to me and he says, well, Goldilocks, I have a couple of suggestions for you.
Oh so he called me Goldilocks. Uh okay.
And then on top of that again, remember only asked for was the shortest route that's not too hard, and whether that is under seventy degrees. That's it, that's the only's that was my question. He ends up asking me all this stuff and gives me a budget, tells me where to stay, tells me what to do with the luggage, tells me there are some towns that I don't want to miss, and that I can take public transportation for part of the trip to shorten it up. So I'm not walking as far as long as I do that
last sixty kilometers. So he gives me these these this cheat sheet on how to Seymour of Spain.
Right, but still but do a shorter trip. I mean I can't.
And then he and then he goes into my shoes and what kind of shoes are you wearing?
Yeah?
Well, so this is what I'm talking about having to moral this. Well, look, so just to finish that up, my moral of this story is that that's an example of a good assistant. That's an example of someone that is improving my life.
And saving me time.
It might have taken me months to come up with this if.
I I'm getting the opposite out of this dating. We all want just the certificate without with the least path of resistance.
And what the smarter version of us is telling us is enjoy the collar, enjoy the journey, find stop and smell the roses. All that, and don't be so focused on the certificate. Be focused on the journey.
Got it.
Yeah, but that's actually what Claude was telling me too. Yeah, don't focus on the certificate. You need to know that this is an amazing life changing journey, so don't miss it.
That being said, you know, whether it's dating or the hike, the pilgrimage, the right shoes matter.
The right shoes do matter matter?
All right?
Again, this is fun. I like doing this. This is probably really quaint. If you're listening to this five years from now. I was like, oh, that's so cute. They tried to figure out how to use this. People still date human beings? Is that interesting?
Learn how to use AI and also learn how to date.
And force your way offline because for all you know, you've been going back and forth with some uh with groc for a long time.
Use it as a springboard.
Don't use it instead of you, don't lose you.
Okay, this is fun.
It was fun.
Thank you as far as us like, share, follow, Please review this podcast.
I don't care if you use AI to write your reviews, Just do it. Your reviews still.
Mean a lot to me, to Keko and in the podcasting ecosystem.
Shoot us any email Great Loovedebate at gmail dot com.
If you've got questions, thoughts, AI tips, whatever you want to do, go to Great Lovedebate dot com.
Who knows what you'll find there. Maybe we use AI to add some fun and.
Surprises for you, because, as always at the Great Love Debate, we never.
Stopped making love.
See you next time the Great Love Debate. It's the Great Love Debate.
Degree Love Debate.
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