Welcome to the Good Stuff.
I'm Jacob Schick and I'm joined by my co host and wife.
Ashley Shick.
Jake is a third generation combat Marine and I'm a gold Star granddaughter. And we work together to serve military veterans, first responders, frontline healthcare workers, and their families with mental and emotional wellness through traditional and non traditional therapy.
At One Tribe Foundation, we.
Believe everyone has a story to tell, not only about the peaks, but also the valleys they've.
Been through to get them where they are today.
Each week, we invite a guests to tell us their story, to share with us the lessons they've learned that shape who they are and what they're doing to pay it forward and give back.
Our mission with this show is to dig deep in our guest's journey so that we can celebrate the hope and inspiration their story has to offer.
We're thrilled you're joining us again.
Welcome to the Good Stuff.
Our guest today is a great man. We met at Jake's alma mater and where he played football, Koppel High School in North Texas.
Go Cowboys.
Regardless of where you are in the world, football is religion. Here in Texas and Texas high school football head coaches are highly regarded.
High school football brings communities together, and the coaches are the ones who help shape these young athletes and leaders in their communities.
We are so stoked to have head football coach at Coppel High School, Coach Antonio Wiley here on the Good Stuff.
He's here to share his journey with us of growing up in East Dallas in the path.
That led him to where he is today.
Antonio Wiley, thank you so much for joining us and welcome to the Good Stuff.
Thank you guys for having me.
We're thrilled you're here. We talk about football a lot on this podcast.
We just do.
We're in Texas, Jake and I both grew up in it, and from the moment we met you, we were.
Like, we've got to have Antonio on the podcast.
Coach Antonio.
Coach Antonio just called me coach Antonio.
Why they don't do that?
Not your full name? Coach Antonio?
Cool the way, Yeah, but that's like asking me when a four star general walks up to me, he's like just call me Tom. I'm like, that's not gonna happen. Like No, It's like I think it's a trap.
But not only are you a head football coach in Texas, you're the head football coach at Coppel High School, which is drum roll please, Jake's alma mater.
Damn right, it is.
That's what I'm talking about, telling me, go cowboy ouh, let's get it.
Donet's cowboy all the way all day.
Y'all could sit here and do this for like the whole the l the podcast.
Some people get it and some don't.
You guys are just so energetic, and it's like, yeah, there's a reason that we don't suck that much, no doubt, because everything's with purpose, speed, intensity. I don't get out of bed and put my leg on before I go to the bathroom and go I'm going to go completely out of my way to be completely average today.
In mys there's no place for average. If you're accept being average, you need to go find something else to do other than live because average ain't a place where I can ever survive. Being a competitor and being an athletics your whole life and growing up a certain way, it breeds for competition, and if you accept being average, you need to go play with the average. Kids don't come in my world.
And that's one of the main reasons we wanted to have you here on the good stuff, because that is what it's all about, right, that mindset, that good energy that you just again have exuded from the moment that Jake and I met you. We've been blessed to work with not only your athletes, but a lot of the athletes at cop LISD on some of our service projects that we have. We love getting the kids involved, to include our own. But I mean, you've got a fascinating story. Take us back to the beginning.
Grew up Inner City Dallas. You know, a few blocks from the State Fair, a neighborhood that was really high crime rates, a lot of drugs, a lot of things like that going on in the neighborhood. Crimes are normal there. Gunshots are normal in that neighborhood. There's no such thing as, oh, I live in a safe place. It was safe because we made it safe because we took care of each other. But outside people coming in and that kind of stuff, or you had conflict with somebody from four blocks over.
You know, that's the thing about that neighborhood. We call it East Dallas. But some people if you drove to it like this is South Dallas. But you better not tell us guys who were from East Dallas that to South Dallas because we would have a problem with that, you know what I mean. So it was a tough neighborhood. I wouldn't change anything about that because it molded me into the man I am today. I never walk out
worried about what's gonna happen. I just go in and I say, whatever takes place, we're gonna jump in with both feet and find a way to handle it. You know, when we were coming up, games were a big deal. During that time, we didn't have a lot, and I didn't know it because we had I had a big family growing up there. You know, we went through times with not having a lot. Then my dad started a playing company and that changed and things we had a lot,
and then we went back and forth. You know, you go to times where lights might be off and then in other times you've got you know, brand new cars and other thing going your way. But I think growing up in the neighborhood I grew up in, you see a lot of things, you know. You see a lot of a single parent homes, You see a lot of young men get lost into the system. And I was blessed because you know, I was that young man who
would toe that line. But I knew my dad would kill me if I went too far, you know, But also not saying I didn't go too far. Sometimes I was just blessed God saw fit to let you walk away from that situation, as opposed to where two days later one of your friends didn't walk away from a situation, or they got caught into something that would have normally been a routine. You did something and you thought, all it's easy, and all of a sudden it turns out
bad for him. And when I turned thirteen, I remember twelve thirteen, we bought a house. We moved a pleasant grove. You know. I was from eat Dallas right there, and so I'm thinking, hey, we're moving up. Don't know, not much difference in the neighborhood. Just you got a brick house now instead of up here in Beam. That was the one thing I went to Samuel, But games were
still relevant. I grew up in a place where right there in these Dallas, where everybody were bloods, and it was you're not in a gang, but everybody around you is somewhat affiliated and that kind of stuff. So it's one of those deals where when I went to Pleasant grow I didn't understand it. That was unc territory when I was in school, and they were all crips. So I'm walking down the street with red jerseys and red laces own and thinking everything's okay. Well I learned pretty quick.
I got jumped a couple of times time. But you know what, life gave me opportunities that I would never change anything about my life. My dad was a great man in the short time that he was here on her with us, great man. He taught me how to take care of my family. He taught me the value of just doing things the right way. I think that all came from my grandpa, who was also a great man, who would just give you the shirt off his back and do anything for a person. He's one of the
best souls you ever gonna meet. I remember one time vividly. My mom tells this story. If you listen to her talk, she'll say, my grandpa just got a new car and she's out. He let her drive it and she wrecks it, so she's freaking out. She don't know what to do. She gets him on the phone. That was back before cell phones were real heavy. So you call him out the landline and she goes, mister Clarence, I'm so sorry that I wrecked your car. And he goes, baby, are
you all right? And she goes, yeah, he said, forget that car, we'll get another one at something. You know, that's just kind of the person he was. He was all about and he would tell his sons when they were wrong about their daughter in laws. They were all crazy about him, you know, because like he got with
great credit and that kind of stuff. So when when my dad got older he started having business and stuff and he was doing well, my mom wanted a car well my dad and didn't have to established credit that my grandpa had, so he goes in. He was that guy. Though once he said no about something, he meant it. So when he went to when he went to him, my mom go to car lots, and he'd ask my mom before they walked in there, how much can you afford to pay for this car? What's the monthly payment?
And she'd go this and he go okay. So when they walk in there, you know, salesman always comes in with these sales pictures and that kind of stuff. And they come in and it could be ten cents over what she said, and he goes, Nope, ain't doing it. And if they can't budget, he's not budgeting. He'll tell her, let's get in the car. She'd be like, I can do that. Nope, you said this, and that's what we're doing. You know, I'll tell you this is my life. My
life's been great. I had a great family. We were poor and didn't even know it sometimes, you know what, I just had three but I had a big family, and so we talk about this. Let's talk about it. My grandma had seven children, one girl. My family is full of boys, I mean like from the top, so that when people got in their scuffles with us, they just like, oh crap, there's a try full of boys.
Because it's like within my grandma's children, there's only my cousin Debora and my cousin Niecy are the two girls in the immediate family right there. The rest of all of her boys had boys too. And so you go back to because I don't have any sisters, I got two younger brothers. So it's just like we've got a family full of boys. You know what. I mean yes, and they were all a little rough cut, so when it came time to get their hands dirty and mix
it up, we were Definitely. It was one of those deals where if you come home and you've been in a tussle with somebody and they didn't feel like you wanted choose from to go back over and we're gonna do it again, you know what I mean, So you better get it done right the first time, you know.
So we talk about this a lot trauma, right, But in your case, it sounds like you had some very strong men that, regardless of your environment, you had these strong examples your grandfather and your father to live by that they actually passed on that generational goodness of this is how to be a man.
Yep, they did. They did a great job. The men in my life were great, But we had some strong women in our families too, my mom, my aunts. They all just kind of locked on and held us down. Now, I don't get me wrong. Did we get in trouble. Absolutely, did we go out and find ways to do things that we knew were possibly going to be suspect from time to time. Absolutely, we also figured out that there ain't no way to avoid it. Some people want to avoid conflict so much in their life that they never
deal with those tough situations. Me and I think it's been one of the biggest blessings of my life is the fact that I learned how to take on conflict head on and not dodge it and not avoid it and have tough conversations, and when it had to get physical, we took care of it and we moved on. Nowadays, I think there's a weird dynamic going on because you got people who want to be tough in front of a camera on social media, but they also don't want to actually do it when the rubber meets the road.
Keyboard Warriors, oh I keyboard warriors.
No, That right there drives me crazy.
We live in a very passive society. People go out of their way to avoid conflict or discomfort. Nobody wants to be uncomfortable, and it's like that's the only place you coul grow, you know, and you've got to meet it head on. You have to step up and book and right things, just like we tell the boys all the time. Well you heard me tell your boys, Hit Coppell, right things, right reasons, arrest, take care of yourself, no matter what, if you fail, it better beat one hundred percent.
Don't be a fright to fail. That's the fear of failure drives me every day. I tell people this all the time. I say, because if I fail, I have fifteen assistant coaches. I have a wife and kids at home. They have wives and children at home. So if I fail as a head coach, I don't only fail myself, I failed them, so my job. What did I say? They said, The fear of failure forces me to prepare. And if you're not preparing, you're preparing to fail.
That's what I always.
I said it yesterday morning, I said it this afternoon. I said all the time, the fear of failure dictates your greatness.
What do you do with that failure? Are you afraid to take a shot because you might fail?
You know?
I tell our kids all the time. I say, if I put a mirror in front of you. I talk to my football team. If I put a mirror in front of you and it said, this is what you have to go through to have a chance to play sixteen games, to have a chance to play for a state championship, are you willing to go through it? Even though you might go zer and ten. That doesn't mean you're not gonna fail. This is what you have to
go to to have a chance. How many of you guys are gonna say, Coach, I'm in the boat still, let's do it.
Yeah, you had these life lessons that a lot of kids, like our kids do not have. Don't have a clue what that's like, don't have an idea like, oh, it depends on what color shoelaces I wear when I walk like I might have to, I might have to throw down.
That is not a thing where they are.
No.
I love this episode because you're proof positive.
That you channel it for good. You use it for good.
And not only have you used it for good, you practice gratitude daily because of it. And that is a mindset. That's a decision you make and you use it to your advantage. I just think it's an awesome thing that is also unfortunately a dying thing in this country.
And that's the thing I tell you a lot of time, some of the best leaders are in rough neighborhoods. What did I lead kids to do? What did I lead their community in? That's the difference. Like some of the worst criminals are the best leaders. People believe in them. You go back through generation some of the biggest gangsters and all that stuff. What did they do. They got people to believe in them and by their message. It's the same thing. So you can generate that power one
way or the other. You can decide to take people down this path, lead them to a place of destruction, or you can decide to take down the path of greatness and say, hey, we're gonna find a way to do right by people, do right by society. But it's funny how you brought that up about our kids. Don't understand that, because that was one of my biggest concerns when I walked into Coppell as the head football coach, because I was at which toftose Hershey, which has a
different socio economic status. I mean, it's different population, and those kids needed me on a different scale. And in a way that kind of fed my soul a little bit as a human being because you get to go out and every day you having a major impact on
youth lives. So the way I looked at it was when I went to Copel and then I had to kind of readjust because you get from the outside looking in you think everything's always great because there's a little bit of a bubble there, but it's not always what people expected to be. And those kids needed me too, just on a different level. Sometimes they need reality because they don't get it anywhere else. Fact, and we have great kids, great parents, great community, all that put together.
But one thing I get to do in the football world is I get to give you reality all the time. There's a reality check when you come to me every day. There is no well I felt like I deserve now you don't deserve anything. The only thing in life is guaranteed to you. And football is a hard time. So let's figure it out.
So how did your path lead you to football when you were a young kid there in eats Dallas, oh Man.
We moved to Pleasant Grove, like I said, right there, and I started. I didn't play high school football to my sophomore year, and so I was a pretty athletic kid. Could run, could jump, and do all that well. Going through my sophomore year, I felt like I should be a varsity player, but you know I was wasn't all the way accountable. I was just kind of flirting with the line. They didn't want to buy in one hundred percent.
So going into my junior year, my high school coach Steve Pearce, who's still the head coach at Dallas Samuel Right. Really yeah, still drive that same little white Toyota probably too. He calls me into his office and he goes Antonio. He said, there ain't no more straddling the fence for you. He said, you either all the way in or all the way out. I was that kid that was gonna run around, possibly get in trouble, but nothing too major, that kind of stuff. But I wasn't committed to the
task at hand. I wouldn't committed to the team goal way that I needed to be. And so he told me, he said you all the way in, all the way out. He said, to tell you something, if you hangle crap, you're gonna smell like crap. And that was his exact message to me. And you know, I decided that at that point I wanted to lock in and be a high school football player and do that. Things went well. I ended up getting a scholarship to go play at Eastern New Mexico University and for the next four or
five years. That was great. I played straight through four straight years It's weird though, because as you played through those times in college, you have this structure, Boom, we're gonna we're gonna work out at six am. We got to be in class by eight, so you have to eat breakfast between workouts and class. From eighth to noon, you always had class and then you'd have two o'clock position meetings and then so you'd have that little time at two hours span or to eat lunch and get
ready for meetings. You go do that. So this is an everyday reoccurrence. So two o'clock position meetings, you on to feel at three thirty, off the field at five forty five or something like that, head to the cafeteria, go eat, go back, go to meetings, come back, do homework, and do it all again. It's just a repetitive miss. And then all of a sudden they snatched that structure from around you. When you're done playing football and you walk around lost. For I was lost. I mean for
three semesters. My GPA went from like a three seven to a one nine because I didn't I did absolutely nothing. I wasn't going to class half the time, wasn't doing anything. Lost that purpose, yes, because that was my day. That was what drove me, you know what I mean every day. I knew it wasn't even a question in it. So my coach called me in, another coach that was big in my life, Eric Bowl, and he goes, you know cause my parents like a lie to them. In college,
you say, oh yeah, my grades are grazy great. Ain't nobody checking them up?
I'm going to class, I'm doing Ain't nothing going on.
You're good, ain't Ain't no teacher call and said, hey, Antonio, ain't been turning there nothing that don't work that way. He said, you're grown in now. So coach Boll called me because he knew he should have saved. He said, hey, tone, he called me tone. So I go in as obvious, say where you being?
Man?
I go, coach, I ain't even gonna lie to you. I ain't been doing nothing. I ain't even going to class, ain't doing nothing. I'm just lost, man, I said, I don't know what to do. He goes, let me ask you this, what kind of life do you want to give a little Tom? Because I had my oldest son at this time. I had him when I was a sophomore in college. And I go, coach, I ain't never got to be rich in life, you know what I mean?
I said, All I got to be able to do is buy my son a car when he leaves to go to college, and raise him to be a productive human being, an asset to society, not a blight, not a leech. I want him to do something in society, be an asset to his community. He goes, well, have you ever thought about coaching? I go, no, not really. I love a game, but I ain't never thought about coaching it, you know what I mean. And so he had me to come out. He talked to me a little bit. So I decided to do it. So I
go in. I've changed my major at four times by this point, so I'm so far away from graduating it's unreal probably. And then so I go in. They say, I said what I got to do to get into education? I want to teach. I want to coach. And he goes, well, it's a little late. You've missed the train on the education side of it, he said, but you can change your major from I like. At that time, I was
Business Communication Systems. So he said, you can change it to university studies with emphasis on history and physical education. He said, but you got a one nine GPA, so you're gonna take twenty one hours. You can be done in one semester. And you got to get a four point oh GPA on it at the time. So I'm over there, I'm like, sign me up. And so I gotta go to so I gotta go to the dean's office, and they got they gotta approve it. And I did it,
and I feed it out and I finished it. I look back on those key moments, and a couple of them. Outside of my dad and my family and my mom, coaches had a major impact on where I landed.
So going back to when that high school coach sat you down, what was it like when you stopped straddling the fence and you fully committed to football.
You lose some friends along the way that normally not so much as you lose them, but y'all grow apart. You don't become enemies or anything, just grow apart because y'all's interest levels changed. You're growing into the next phase of your life as a person, and they're going down whatever path they chose. And if those two paths on the line, it naturally creates separation. You still love them.
You know, you'll still say what's up, You're still hang out with each other, but you know that day to day interaction with y'all is going to be lessened because y'all don't have the same goal right now, right.
And that takes a lot of conviction and discipline too. I mean, I know that being clean and sober, you know, I mean a lot of my great friends were no longer my great friends when I decided to get clean and sober. And it's the same type of thing. It's like, Okay, well I want to be down this path. You're gonna say on that path, that's fine, but I'm not coming over there.
I've been there, don't ask me to, right. And the good friends, the true friends, the one that actually care about you, they won't try to drag you down there. They'll let you take your own path and they'll still say what's up. But the dealer, they just know y'all have grown apart.
What was it about football?
Oh?
Man?
Is not about football, I say, it's a lot, man, But it's the brotherhood part of it. The part of it. You got a group of guys that when y'all walk in there and y'all are playing this game together. This game is all focused on all of us doing our individual job to finish one goal. And when that unit works as a whole and things go the way they should, it's a beautiful thing. It's like any other thing in life.
You watch a car come down to the assembling line, one of those machines work wrong, it's shut the whole assembly line down. Watch a good football team work as a unit. Watch a good offensive line work as a unit. Offensive line and the other unsung heroes of a football game, because everybody can tell when the old lineman is doing it wrong, and they get no credit when they're doing
it right. For nobody but the o line parents. And one thing they gotta tell running back to my quarterbacks, you can celebrate with the rest of those skinny dudes anytime. Go celebrate with your with your old line. Go tell them thank you because he kept your quarterback clean. He may created that gap for you to run the ball. But watch a good old line, watch a good line of work in unison. They take the first step running
outside zone or running zone, the zone comes up. Whatever, it's a beautiful thing when you watch it happen.
Giant ballas there's nothing in the world like it. There's nothing in the world.
Like one of the one of the coaches we know, we're having dinner with his wife and it was like, god, I mean, these guys are just getting bigger, stronger, faster. And he was coaching another line and he said, you know, Jake, really what it is is they're just giant ballerinas.
I think they're a lot tougher.
Yeah, and I but it was like, you watch how fast their feet are, how light they are on their feet, and they're these massive human beings. And it's like we tell the boys all the time, you got quick feet, you can play in the sports.
Gotta have quick feet.
I went out and watched a Cowboys practice last fall one day and Tyron Smith walks up and he is a massive human being. I mean you walk up on him and you know, you think, oh, lineman, you think out of shape kind of good. You know, No, these dudes are six seven machines that got six packs. And I mean, you're like, somebody, somebody bring my gun. If I get into it him, it's gonna be something with you know, you don't want like that guy. If he hits on your wife. You're like, hey, really that's fine.
Just you hey, ba, we're good. He didn't say anything, let's go. Let's go because I don't. I'm not gonna back down. But I know this could get ugly real fast. You know what.
Yeah, I'm with you. It's crazy. It's crazy.
I mean just watching the combine and watching it's like one of these giants, I think it was three.
Hundred and what was he?
I think he was like three seventy or something like that, and you ran, I think it was a sub four seven.
That's like a Volkswagon running down, you know, like a little v W. Yeah, to be in front of that, So you know, that's that's I mean. But that's what we're getting now. I'm getting to that generation where I'm not the old coach, but I'm getting to where I've been in it for a while. So I get these young coaches that are twenty five, twenty six years old, and they come in, you know, the age old question
about who's the greatest of all time basketball? All that I don't even get me and my Corners coach started because he he will like the day that Lebron James broke the all time scoring record, he shows up the next day with the lebron James Jersey, and so I gave him the business. I tell him, I said, win is win man, I said, And I'm gonna tell you I never seen him Jay not win it, you know, and he gets so welled up. So but you know, that's the thing these kids are. They are bigger, faster,
more physical. That's why there are more serious injuries that take place because these are violent collisions that are taking place every play.
Talk about the heighs and lows of a football game, how can you apply that to your life.
I think that's why coaches coach football, because there's only a few things in life that's going to give you that same roller coaster of emotion that you go through on a football field, and the roller coaster of emotion
you have to watch kids go through. You watch kids completely tank and they're in a bad place and you have to go pick them up, and you watch them at the height that one moment where they look up, their eyes are lit up and things are just right and it's like everything in the universe just came together
for them right there in that moment. And in life, there's only a few moments outside of you know, if you're in the military, or you're a coach, or you're an athlete or something like that, that you get to experience those type of moments. That's watching your kids take their first ship, watching them be born, that first time you hold your baby, because it's a deal. Moms have an instant connection with that baby. The first time that baby moves around and they feel it it's done. Their
hearts are locked in. In my opinion, dads don't develop that emotion until they hold them and until that baby's in front of them. Now, ohs crap. Life's bigger than me, you know what I mean. But there's only so many moments for the average human being to come out and experience those moments. But in the world of athleticism, you get to re create those moments week in and week out.
That big play takes place and that kids come running to the sideline and you body fiving them and you're loud and you're screaming and you're getting after them, and hey, we're gonna know. It's one of those things I always tell them. I said, listen, let's blood in the water. Let's go finish, because our quote, our thing, this shit was deep water and you know, and we always talked about, Hey,
it's getting deep now. Because my thing is when people ask me what do you mean by that, I say, we're gonna train for those places like you talked about earlier, of being in a place of discomfort. We're gonna train, We're gonna get familiar, we're gonna get used to, we're gonna get okay, we're being uncomfortable, and then we're gonna drag our opponents to that point and see if they can tread water with us, and if they can't, we're
gonna drown. But I think that's the same thing we start talking about their emotional ride of life.
I mean, I want to want I want to run through a wall right now.
I know you want to suit up and go seriously.
Like I think I could do.
I could give you a good four minutes probably couch.
Okay. It annoyed me, probably because I wanna say I got about six hot plays, but I'm gonna say it's gonna be six plays of fury. But after that, somebody don't have to come pull me off and ambulance.
I think it's so beautiful that you had this sport, that you were able to put your everything into and then turn it into a profession. How did you then enter into coaching? Okay, this is the path I'm going to go and then take us through that journey.
Oh man, I knew I loved the game, and I knew I wanted to continue to be around it once I figured out coaching was the avenue to do it in You know, I started out in a little school out in Nevada, Texas Community High School had an enrollment of about three one hundred and fifty kids, and I struck goal. I got lucky. I was the first year coach that taught one PE class and got to stay in the coach's office. Brian on Neil was the head coach and got to hang out with him and talk
football all day and just go through it. Those small moments that take place where a young man really needs you, you know, whether it be a life situation, life circumstance, or it's just something as small as a coach, I really can't get this. Can we stop and go back over it after practice? You know, you just see that, Oh, and that kid comes back to you five years down
the road. You said something to that kid. You don't even remember seeing it, but he goes, Coach, Remember when you said this to me and you don't really but you know, but Coach, you don't know, that meant the world to me. I was struggling with this, so I was going through that, you know what I mean, those other moments in life that we'll never get back. So
be intentional. Start talking about when I'm talking to kids and we're talking about life, or we're talking about whatever circumstance they bring to me, I try to be very intentional and very present in the moment with them because different kids have differ strung and I promise you some of the places I've been you'll see some real life struggles from children that you feel like, Man, I go home and I want to hoog my babies because you know they they're blessed. They don't know that life's not
their bubble. They don't come you know, like when you hit that light switch at home and the lights come on. You turn that water foster and the water comes on at over that friends and there's food in there. There's kids that don't have that when they go home. You know. That's why it was a big deal for me at multiple places to make sure that we found a way to feed kids like whatever it looked like. You know, we wanted to find a way to get it done.
And I'll tell you I had some people in both communities, every community that I've been into, like as a head coach, which is which Taft Falls and Copel, that are willing to go above and beyond for our kids. And that's what it's about. I mean, that's a future.
And that's it, and that's a community come together for the greater good exactly to provide for that stability for that future. And it's through a sport, you know why it's a big deal. We ate lunch before we went to the game and spoke to the kids. That night, I was watching, I am serving everything, I am reading all the kids.
I'm watching you, watching the.
Other coaches because I wanted to see, like how wired tight is this unit that's my own mater And if I needed to call you out, I was going to And man, you got up and it was food. It was done eating, time to get back to the stadium. And it was like, as soon as you said something, I looked at Ash and I was like, he's got this shit wire tight. I said, that just reminded me in the Marine Corps. You hear one snap and it's like eyeballs and just a finger and everybody's gone.
It's it was like, okay, good, they respect them. That's most important, you know that.
How do you get that from them?
Though?
Right consistency, I'm consistently the same person. Whether it's I'm consistently getting after their butt or I'm consistently loving on them, it's all gonna come full circle. So when I say something, I follow through.
Yep.
If I tell them don't, if the locker room's not clean, I'm gonna get after you tomorrow. I'm gonna do it like there's no well, they almost did it right, almost gets you beat. You know, there's no almost got in from the one yard line, almost got your beat, You got stuffed. Live in the world of right now. I take care of it right now, And I tell them, how do you train kids? How do you train kids? How you train grown ups? How do you change every train?
Everybody immediate response, not I was handling tomorrow. Don't put it off till tomorrow. Let's do it right now. Let's handle it right now. And I think that's living in a right now society. You know that's the world I live in, and I can live life that way as
a football coach. My wife it drives her crazy because I'm like, I'm fiery, I'm wired up, but I don't get stressed out like things that stress her out, Like people will call me and ask me, hey, coach, you want to come talk to us about this head job or that head job, or possibly moving here or something like that. She gets she gets all wound tight, like I don't. I told her, I said, what do you wound worried about? I'm passionate about everything I do, but
situations don't stress me out. I don't live in a stressful place. Now, I'm wound tight. My heart rate gets up, but as far as folding the pressure and stress. For some people, stress overwhelms them stressful situations. I'll tell my wife this. Since I was younger, even when I got into tussles and got in the fights with people, everything around me slowed down like it was in slow motion.
I promise you. I could see things that were happening around me, and I wouldn't even understand how that happened. But it's just my body's response to stressful situations. The way I'm wired that's a gift.
Yeah, you know, that's a gift.
I guarantee, see you, I've been in just so many fist fights, if not more than you, And I promise you that's a gift because not a damn thing slowed down when I was in fist place.
It was weird. It's weird to me, man. I don't know how it happens, but that's the way it's always been. Like I can remember everything that took place in that situation. Like so when things get crazy and people are out of control, I don't know if it's just something that kicks into where I can kind of see it and watch it for what it is or whatever's happening. But I hardly ever lose my composure. And I tell our kids that all the time. If you see me lose
my composure, hit the panic. But they know me losing my composure is not me chewing you out of the numbers, right, because that's what I do. That's part of who I am. But if I'm freaking out, I don't know what we're gonna do. You'll never see that from me, you know what I mean.
And that's why your kids respect you. That's why your football players respect you, and your other coaches respect you because you're consistent. It's so refreshing and Jake mentioned it earlier, but we do it. It's more often than not that we're talking to someone and we ask them who influenced you or who.
Really played a part in that.
Coaches, you see it as a privilege, but you also get the huge responsibility.
Yeah, because.
What did football unlock in you?
A sense of responsibility and accountability. I'm accountable for more than just myself. It unlocked that before I had children, and then children really brought it full circle, as in this world is bigger than me, seriously and my desiring drive. I was always competitive, but I think it unlocked a different level of competitiveness for me because you know, I think everybody wants to be successful, but who wants to do the dirty work to be good at those things?
That's where rubber Measter Road and the greater are separated from the average. When nobody's watching and nobody's they're pushing you in PROD and you to be better. Are you willing to show up and find a way to get better? What's your day look like if you're trying to win? Or are you trying to win in everything you do. Are you like, Okay, I'll win at this because I'm good at it. But this I'm not very good at it. So I'm just gonna not try not to do this
as much. No, those great players find a way to find their weakness and push their weight through those things. You know, like ray Lewis is one of my favorite football players, and everybody asked me why I said this because of the way he played the game, his passion, his fire, and one of his biggest quotes was, you may be bigger than me, stronger than me, but you'll never outwork me for sixty minutes. So will you allow your opponents to outwork you? Will you allow when you
settle in life? Let's talk about that a little bit. When you settle in life, I settle for being the second best on my team. That means it's time for me to quit doing that because now I don't have no job to be better than you. And I tell my backups every day, people who are not the starters, your job is to take his job every day every day. The starter's job is to try to keep that divide, to keep you as his backup every day. If your job.
Ain't coming in here every day to try to take his job and make me tell you not this week. You almost had him, but not this week. And when I tell you that, that doesn't light another fire under you to be like, Okay, what do I gotta do to jump him next week. That's where great teams are created.
Absolutely, most definitely, And that's what it's proof positive too, that you can have that inner competition, right, You're after the same goal when it's a championship, you after the freaking dub. But having that inner competition it makes you better. It's that iron Sharpen's iron saying you're only as strong
as your weakest slink. Hey, I can relate to that from the days when I played and people I mean just challenging you and you knew who was there and who had it, and then you knew who was close and the coach is damn sure.
And you know what you do as a coach. You put that guy in the feel More often you don't take the job, but you find ways to get him snaps at a different place where I got to get him on the field because I know what he brings to the party. You know, That's why I said, how about that settling for being second? I tell kids all the time, ever settle, because if you settle, you're settling
for being second best in life. Once you settle once and you become a place where you're comfortable with settling, you're gonna settle for being second best at finding a wife. You're gonna see this girl over here, you think she's awesome, but you're gonna allow somebody else to walk in and talk to her before you do, because you settling. You're like, ah, she may be out of my league. You're gonna settle for being second and finding a job because he's a
little smarter than me. I know, I might out working, but he's smarter and better than me, so I'll take his assistant job.
You see.
And that's what people need to understand, all right, Because I know that we talked about football a lot on the show, and here's why. Because you were molding the future leaders of this country, of possibly the world.
We don't know, but you were making an impact.
And you know because you were on the receiving end as a kid who had no idea what the hell you wanted to do or which way you were gonna go, and the coach helped you get there, somebody who was convicted and who they are and driven to give of themselves just like you do with these kids. The same reason they respect you, why you stand up and walk out. They know it's time to go, so.
You know, and I I've had coaches tell me that before, like how you listen? How do you get them to do that? So it's the standard. There ain't no dropping the ball. It's a standard that we said and it's going to be done that way or you won't be on my team. That's the truth of it. And I'll tell you this, I'm blessed I have a staff full of coaches. You've always got this vision of what you want your program to look like, but I need those other fifteen men to pull that vision out. I'm telling
them what I want. But they helped me bring it to fruition.
And they would bleed for it, you know what I mean. We got to Ashton, I got a spendi of time with all of them. I mean, they would absolutely bleed for you. You're you're a great people collector, and I think that attributes to your success on the gridiron. And I think that has everything to do with where you started and where you are now.
I just believe in doing right by people. I tell guys all the time, I'll run through a wall for you as long as you're doing your job. But you better know if you ain't, I'm coming for you too. No, and our coach will tell you. They're like, hey, we love him, he's great to work for, but he's gonna get after you if it ain't right. Sometimes I'll get after a coach for a different response, because I don't always get after a coach to get after the coach that was indirectly at the kid. But I want to
see how that young man handles that situation. If he goes down, sits on that bench, starts eating nice and not in drinking gatorade and not worried about what just happened. His coach got his butt shootout for him, that tells me things have happened. Wow, that coach has failed to create a create an environment where that kid loves his coach. He don't have a relationship with that kid, so that kid is not invested in him in the appropriate situation. When you get after a coach about a kid and
that kid knows directly it was about his performance. He's gonna be sitting over there waiting for you to quit talking to that coach, And like, coach, that's.
Ownership and account that's exactly.
What do you do to relax and recharge.
I'll go fishing. I like to go out and do some fishing, but I like to go catching a lot of a lot of draw fishing. But you know, I'm a big tinker, so I'll be out in the garage, like you go, look at my grans. Wife gets so upset with me because there's always stuff in there that she can't park in the garage. He gets all upset. So I'm I'm a guy that will I'll buy a little small engines and work on him and do that kind of stuff. Just something to keep myself busy, I
promise you. I'm probably ADHD all that all wrapped up in the one, but I was never diagnosed, So it's just one of those deals where I found ways to cope with that extra energy without the medicaid and that kind of stuff.
I'd like to know one person or entity that had the biggest impact on you, Okay, So it's the one person that you can't go through a day living or not and it'll be like this rest of your life without thinking about that person.
Probably my dad, no matter what, through all his faults, because he wasn't perfect, you know what I mean, mistakes, fought his own demons with prescription painkillers and all that kind of stuff. But through all that, he showed me how to be a man. He showed me how to
put my family first. He showed me that it's okay to be selfless, you know, because I remember sometimes he would cook dinner for us when we had moo to Pleasant Grove and the paving company hadn't took off yet, and he would make sure I ate, my mom ate, my brothers ate, and it would be not as much left. But he made sure his kids ate, and his wife ate.
So I think he's this. If I had to say one person or one entity, it's him, because no matter through all his faults, he showed me how to take care of my family and be a man and treat people right.
I get emotional at least one episode.
That's just that's beautiful, like truly a parental sacrifice. I want to know, what would you say to a young man sitting in East Dallas.
Oh man, I tell him the world is bigger than East Dallas. Just give yourself a chance to get out. I saying you don't. You can't go back. I go back. Still. My grandma still lives there, not as often as I would like to. My Grandma's ninety three and she still gets around and she does great. One matriarch of our family does. But I'll tell you this, I tell him, don't be afraid to embrace new challenges. The world is a lot bigger than that small area that you're in.
Go out, enjoy life. Spend time learning about other cultures and finer things in life, and not saying it's got to all be about money and finances. Just find a way to invest in other people. Learn about people, watch people a lot earlier in life.
Great advice.
Coach antonio' Wiley not only the head football coach at Coppel.
High School, the Coppo High School in Coppel.
Texas, where football is king, but also a great father, a great leader, and a great friend.
Thank you so much for being here with us on the good stuff.
Thank you guys for having me. It's been amazing.
You're a blessing for us to be able to call family and brother bro and we appreciate you.
Well appreciate you guys. I think it's amazing what you guys are doing. Like I said, we love to jump in and join in on some other stuff that you guys got going. So just know that we're a phone call away and Copeil Football still loves you and we want you around.
How pumped up are you right now?
There's not a wall I couldn't run through.
You were so ready to go put on that uniform again. I mean, it's in our wall in a shadow box.
It's kind of a drag that, like, I can't leave here and go put this energy into something.
It's like, no, just gotta go to dinner and do normal life stuff.
It's not it sucks.
It's because we need this stuff, man, and we gotta.
But that's on me.
We got to figure out how to channel it and use it for the greater good. But I mean, that's why I could do this every day. I just need this once a month, yeah, just once a month, just one quick energy recharger, Like just open your mouth and let the words flow feed my soul.
Absolutely, he's such a great leader of young men. He is such a great husband and father, and clearly that comes from his own upbringing and just that love of football, which obviously you.
And I share and have since day one. It's contagious.
Yeah, I mean he's turned his passion into a paycheck.
Yeah, and he turned that program around the year before he came to Coppel, they were four and six, nine and two his first season, nine and two.
Like you said, he wants to win. He has no interest in second place, and that's why he demands the most of his people. That's not only his kids on the team, but his assistant coaches. I mean, he's the leader all the way around because he lives the example.
Absolutely.
Coach Antonio Wiley such energy, It just it feels so good to have these conversations. We hope that you were inspired as well, and thank you so much for listening today. If this episode touched you, please share it and be part of making someone else's day better.
Put on your bad ass capes and go be great today. And remember you can't do epic stuff without epic people. Thank you for listening to the good Stuff.
The Good Stuff is executive produced by Ashley Shick, Jacob Schick, Leah Pictures and q Code Media, Hosted by Ashley Shick and Jacob Shick, Produced by Nick Cassellini and Ryan Contos.
Post production supervisor Will Tindi.
Music editing by Will Haywood Smith, Edited by Mike Robinson,