71. how to start romanticizing your life this summer - podcast episode cover

71. how to start romanticizing your life this summer

May 18, 2023•43 min
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Episode description

Hi my loves 🦋 In today's episode we chat:

-what it really means to romanticize your life
-how to find what actually makes you feel good in your daily life
-how to start cultivating and living the life of your dreams right now
-childhood memories and learning to meet your needs as an adult
-giving yourself permission to experience happiness and joy
-questions you can ask yourself to get you closer to living out the life you desire
AND MORE 💗

My heal to manifest & inner child discovery journal prompt guides https://beacons.ai/theglowupsecrets

The glow up secrets podcast channel https://www.youtube.com/@theglowupsecretspodcast

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My book recommendations https://amzn.to/3AOnJuO

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My audio podcast, instagram, tiktok & pinterest can all be found here: https://candr.link/theglowupsecrets

If you need advice please submit it here, instead of DM's (I will not be able to get back to you via DM) https://beacons.ai/theglowupsecrets

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Transcript

Hi, everyone, Welcome back to another podcast episode. My name is Licia Goggin, the host of the Globe Secrets podcast, where I help you expand your mind and become more self aware so that you can glow up into the best version of yourself. I feel like I haven't talked on the podcast for so long and it's only been a week, but I am happy to be back as always. How is everyone doing? Happy summer. I know it's not summer, but to me, in my brain and my reality, it

is summer. And it's so funny because I made a changing your Identity for Summer video on my YouTube channel, which go check that out if you have not. I'll definitely talk about it though a few or last week, and I opened up the video by saying, if I'm not mistaken, summer starts May twentieth, and no it doesn't, it starts June twenty. First,

I don't know why I said that. I actually don't think I realized that I was saying May instead of June, because realistically, when I recorded that video, it was like May twelfth or something I don't know or something, So it's girl, summer is not in a week. But anyways, listen, my mind is in summer, just as most of ours are because the

sun is out. And listen, I know it's not summer everywhere. A lot of you guys let me know that in the comments, and honestly, I really totally forgot that some places technically it's winter, Like in Australia, you guys are going into winter, although it's not like you guys really experienced very cold weather. But anyways, and or where if you live in a very hot climate, like if you're in Florida, if you're freaking in India or something, it is going to be hot no matter what. And it's

actually just going to get hotter. So you guys were telling me how it's so interesting to hear all of the things that I'm planning on doing this summer, and we all are that are maybe like in the Northern Hemisphere in terms of going outside and like getting more sun, and it's going to be hot, and we love it and we're welcoming it. Yet some of you guys are like, I'm about to go inside because it's about to be too hot. It's giving Texas summer. So I'm here for it regardless. Whatever it

is that you guys are going to be doing or not doing. But I also just love the fact that there's so many of you all around the world listening to this podcast and we're all on the same vibe. We all have different stories, we're all going through different circumstances in our lives, but the collective is we're here, We're ready to go up in the bestiver to ourselves, and we need to talk about how we are going to romanticize our summer.

And it's funny because I remember when romanticizing your life started to first become a trend online on YouTube and on TikTok even Pinterest. When people started using the word romanticize, I didn't really understand it, and I wasn't really in that niche in a way like it looked cool, like when girlies were like going out on hot girl walks and taking cute photos of themselves and buying flowers

at the market. That was deemed romanticizing your life. Like I didn't really think that it was for me. But fast forward to this point in my life, even last year, but recently and thinking about the video that I made the changing your Identity this summer, I'm really in the vibe of truly not only understanding what it means to romanticize your life, but I'm so absolutely here for it, and I think it's so freaking important and we need to

start doing it. But I want to talk about what it means to me to romanticize your life and how you can do it for your own life in a way that is very unique to you, so that you're not just doing what everyone else is doing because you see it on Pinterest or you see it on TikTok, to the point where maybe you do it for a little bit, but then it doesn't really stick, and you know, not every moment

of our lives are we going to be able to romanticize our lives. But realistically, to me, romanticizing your life is creating a life that you no longer want to run away from. It's creating a life of ease, of peace, of joy, of finding beauty and the things that resonate to you, that feel good to you. And to really think back about why I didn't really resonate with this whole trend of romanticizing your life was for one, I didn't really have the life that I saw everyone else living when they said

that that's what it means to romanticize your life. So I felt like I couldn't really like relate. But on top of that, I have always been somebody in my life who is completely stripped all joy out of my life because I've been in a scarcity mindset. I've been stressed, I've been hyper masculine, I've been basically in survival mode. I'm no longer in that now, but that's how my life was. I didn't really have time to romanticize my life, let alone. Even if I did and I tried, it wouldn't

even really stick because I would just judge myself. I would I would tell myself, like, no, you can't do this. This is not your life. You're not allowed to like you know what is a life of romanticizing and just being happy and enjoying your life aka really just resting in that feminine

energy, right, and feminine energy. It's expressed in a million different ways, But if we're going to think about romanticizing and loving our lives, there is a component of that feminine energy within in which I was never able to tap into all of my life. And so even when I did try to romanticize my life without even maybe putting the word onto it, it didn't really stick. And on top of that, I tried to romanticize my life based

off of what other people were doing. So you know, the girlies on Pinterest who are having paint days or they're going to the farmer's market, or they're getting flowers or they have like really cute photos or whatever they're doing. I tried to emulate that life because that's what I thought it was, but it didn't really feel good and it felt like I was like trying too hard, and I feel like that's not how it's actually supposed to be when you're

romanticizing your life. So on one hand, it was hard for me to stick to anything because I was trying to pick up habits, routines, lifestyle from people who are just showing me on social media. Which is also fine. We can get inspired and motivated by people. I do too, but I do in such a different way now, So there was that component.

But also I never even really let myself actually be in the present, because you know what, you can definitely look on the outside like you're romanticizing your life and you're going on hawk roll walks and you're living your best life and you're going to the flower market and you're doing all these things, but in your head, you're not really in the present. You're doing things for show, you're doing things just for the photo. You're doing things just because everyone

else told you this is what it means to romanticize your life. And so for me, that's what I struggled with too. So it never really stuck for me because I wasn't actually romantizing my life, and I didn't understand how

it could feel so good because it wasn't feeling good to me. But now I can really see what it means to romanticize my life and actually be in that present moment and not be doing it just because I've told myself I have to romanticize my life and be able to actually feel into the energy of this happiness, enjoy and the presence that comes from actually being this energy of somebody who emanticizes their lives. So what I've come to realize is this romanticizing your

life is literally going to be so unique to you. And furthermore, the way you're going to find what works for you and how to truly cultivate this happiness and just romantizing your life is to figure out what feels good to you and your nervous system, and on top of that, what feels good to

your inner child. Now, something else that I've been thinking about in my past years being on a healing journey glowing up into the best version of myself is realizing that this game of life that we live, essentially what we are doing on these journeys is we are trying to essentially meet our inner child's needs that did not get met in childhood. We're learning how to love ourselves when

maybe there wasn't somebody around us that knew how to love us. We are learning to show up for ourselves and build healthier relationships because we didn't get that before. We are learning how to upgrade our lives and be better with our finances and create a life of our dreams when it comes to financial stability because we most likely did not get that in childhood. Essentially, all the things that we seek in our lives are the opposite of what we've gotten handed.

So to me or mendicizing my life really means meeting my inner child's needs, making sure that I'm feeling safe and secure and loved and happiness in my day to day life because there was so many experiences in my life where I was not feeling safe, I was not feeling happy, I was not feeling abundant. And I think sometimes what we do is we try to meet our needs in ways that other people have told us that we need to meet our needs. So let's say we didn't experience a lot of safety in our lives.

If you go on social media, there's going to be a million people telling you how to feel more safe in your life, whether that be through luxury items, whether that be through not working, whether that be through finding a husband, whether that be through simply accepting yourself and loving yourself. Like, there's a million things, and it's not really to deem any of these right or wrong, but we need to tap into to find out what really works

for us. Is what feels the best to us? Does learning how to become the main character and put our attention on ourselves and love ourselves and accept ourselves. Does that feel good to us? Is that the thing that's going to help us heal? Is that the thing that's going to really meet our inner child's needs? Yes, or maybe no. Is finding a healthy, secure relationship and getting a husband and having children really going to meet some of

our inner child's needs. Because maybe our inner child was very lonely when she was younger, she didn't have love in her life, she didn't have a big family, whatever it is. Then yeah, maybe that is what's going to make her feel safe and happy and loved in her life but also home. Maybe it's not right, but people on the internet will tell you, okay, like this is how you're gonna get happiness or how you're gonna whatever.

But it's going to be so important. This is something that I've really is what feels the best to me, and whatever feels good to me, I need to go in that direction, and I need to add more of those things into my life so that I can cultivate that feeling of family, that feeling of love within myself, that feeling of financial security, whatever it

is. So the other morning I was doing some journaling and I was thinking about this idea of romanticizing your life and how realistically it's all about doing things that make you feel good. Okay, well, how do you really know what is going to make you feel good? And for me, I first started with really exploring the feelings that I wanted to feel in my life, which was I want to feel safe. I want to feel happy, I

want to feel joy. I want to feel like you know, those mornings in summer when you're a young child and you wake up and the birds are chirping and the sun is out and it's just warm and it's breezy, and you ain't got no responsibilities, but just like maybe I don't know, going on Tumbler or going on a blog or like going out with your friends. At that point in my life, it would definitely Tumbler, But you know, like that feeling of just easiness and just there's nothing, there's nothing to

worry about. That's the feeling that I love. And when I think about that feeling or feel into it, there's always usually some sort of memories that are connected to that. So, like I said, my mind goes instantly to summer mornings when I was younger, other things that I go to for me personally, and this is going to be very personal to you, But every time I feel into this energy of feeling safe and calm and just happy and like there's no stress, my mind goes to living in the suburbs.

My mind goes to my siblings house back in the day. And I have half sisters and a brother by the way, if anyone did not know, so we didn't live in the same house. And my sister and my brother

I have a few more sisters, but they have the same mom. And they had a very big home and it was so beautiful, full and it was like in the suburbs, and they had an in ground pool and we would always go over there and swim, and my brother, he was on soccer team, so they would always have like soccer parties and whatever, and it was just it always felt like home to me. I always felt safe. I always felt like time was just the time didn't exist. Me and

my sister would go up on the top of their stairs. It was like a huge staircase, and every single time I came over, we would get into a sleeping bag and we would like ride the stairs all the way down and we would do that like literally at ten million times, and I just look forward to it all the time. And it was just such an escape

for me. I felt so at home, so peaceful and safe. And when I think about the home that they lived in and the in ground pool in the beautiful backyard, another thing that it reminds me of is when I used to work at a private golf club, and although I was working there and I wasn't actually somebody who golfed, that lifestyle kind of emulated that same feeling of home, of safety, and it always ends being when the sun is out and you see the grass and the weather is perfect and there's no

stress. It also reminds me of hawk grow walks. When you have the most comfy outfit, you're listening to an audiobook or you're listening to a podcast that really gets you in the right mood. You have some water, you're eating healthy, you're taking knaps, maybe you're talking to somebody who really makes you feel at home in terms of a relationship, and there's just like realness

in this relationship. There's no stress, there's no anxiety, Like all of those things really feel so good to my nervous system, and it really does meet my inner child's needs of just feeling safe and at home. So when I reflect on this feeling of safety and peace and where my mind goes into these memories, it really actually correlates to a lot of the things that I'm actually interested in in my life and how I see my future. I literally want to live in a home in the suburbs with my family. I want

an in groundpool. I want this peaceful home for not only me, but for my children. I want to live in an area where, yeah, maybe I could go to a golf course, or yeah I could go do hot grow walks, or I could be eating healthy, I could be taking care of myself. But I have enough time in my day to spend time taking care of myself and my family, cooking, do the things that really make me feel great. And what I used to do when I was younger

was okay. I would see on the internet what it means to roam decide your life, or like, what does it look like to have your dream life? And people would be like, oh, no, it means like going on luxury trips, traveling all over Europe, or living luxury or having cars or whatever. And it's not to say that those things aren't bad,

and maybe that feels really good to your nervous system. But I was chasing all of these things based off of what I thought that I needed, based off of ego, based off of what everyone else was telling me, and I wasn't even really tapping into the feeling because realistically, I don't feel at home. I don't actually feel that safe when I think about having all of these luxury things, which I'm not saying luxury things don't make you feel good

sometimes. What I've noticed is these luxury things really just feed the ego, and although it does feel good sometimes, it doesn't give me that feeling of waking up in the morning when I'm like eleven years old and the birds are chirping and it doesn't really matter what my room looks like, but I'm feeling so safe. Maybe I know that I'm going to my sisters during the day and we're just gonna have fun and we're gonna like relax and whatever it is.

You know, those things don't really tap into my most deepest inner child that really is wanting that. And I also don't want to say that people who do romantize their lives online aren't doing things that feel good to them, because they absolutely might. But again, does going to the flower market really hit the same way as going to a beautiful home in the suburbs and relaxing by the pool. To me, it doesn't really do it for me,

And that's totally fine. But I'm trying to build a life where I can tap and go closer to that feeling of what it feels like when I'm living

in the suburban house with the pool. So what I like to try to do is tap more into that energy and get excited for that and focus more on how it is that I'm going to get closer to living that life versus again just trying to do what everyone else is doing, but on top of that, not judging whatever it is that I do want, because when we have that masculine critical part of us, sometimes we're like, Okay, well,

that's not what everyone else is saying that you need to do. When it comes to romanticizing your life is making a mood board of how you're going to be living in the suburbs, or the music that you should be listening to, or the outfits that you should be wearing, or the walks that you should be going on, or whatever it is, and then you kind of throw away your desires or what really feels good to you, and then you try and do what everyone else is doing, and then that doesn't really

work, and then you're not really romanticizing your life. You're not really kind of in the moment, and like, I've gotten to a point in my life where I no longer judge myself for what it is that I want and

what it is that makes me feel good. There were so many times, even when it comes to just like health and fitness, how many times I tried to force myself to do certain workouts or wake up at certain times, or do certain meditations at this time or that time, or eat these meals because this is why other people are telling me, and it just it didn't work. I wasn't enjoying anything. It didn't feel good to me, and that was because I wasn't doing things that were actually unique to me. I

wasn't doing things that are actually feeding my inner child. I wasn't doing things that I really deep down wanted. So I think there needs to be this huge piece of allowing ourselves to feel how we want to feel and do whatever it is that we want to do this summer to make ourselves feel the absolute

best. We don't need to judge ourselves because we like to go on hawk roll walks, or because we want to spend money on a workout outfit and look cute, and everyone's saying, oh, you don't need to do that, or when you do want to go to the flower market, even though let's say Alicia is saying, m she doesn't really do that to romanatize her life. Like literally, it does not matter what it is that you want to do, big or small, do what you want, do what feels

good to you. So here's some questions that you could ask yourself if you're trying to cultivate this life that you don't want to run away from that feels good to you. And realistically you can say, yeah, I romanticize my life, and this is how. So you can ask yourself, I could design my life in any which way. There's literally no limitations. How would it look, what would I be doing, and how would I be feeling?

And you have to be aware of when your ego is going to want to pop up and try to tell you, okay, no, this is how your life is going to look based off of what everyone else is telling you how it should look. Take that ego aside and truly tap into what would feel the best to you And for me personally, I've been saying this, I want to live in the suburbs, I want to have a beautiful home, I want to have the backyard. I want to have the children.

I want to have all of these things. Like obviously there's more details within that instead of just having children in a husband and a house, like most people want that, but there's a certain mental image that I have of where it's going to be and how it's going to look. And the thing is, like, there's a million different homes in a million different countries. You could be living in a high rise. You could be live in a penthouse. You could be living in a one bedroom, you could be living

in a mansion. You could whatever it is. But like, go to where it actually feels right for you. Because I remember when I was younger, I would when I would like think about questions like this, Okay, if I could have like my dream life, it would be I would tell myself, like I wanted this huge mansion, like the way that Drake's house looks. I wanted a bunch of cars. I wanted a luxury bag, like all of these things. But now I'm like, no, I mean

it'd be cool to have that, right. It's not to say that I wouldn't depending on how much money I have and whatever, but that's not really what's what I know is going to make me feel the absolute best. I just want a beautiful home that I can make my own. I want to live in an area where I feel connected to people and there's community, but you know, there's some space. Another thing you can ask yourself is what

did I want in childhood that I didn't get? Now? This is good to ask yourself because when you start taking action in your life, hopefully these actions can bring you more to the things that you didn't get in your childhood. Do you want more freedom to be able to do what you want in your life because maybe you had parents who just didn't let you do any of

that. Do you want to have more money so that you can go and see your friends, or you can go travel, or you can go do a hobby that you've really been wanting to do that you can't do because maybe you just never had the money to do it. Understanding some of the things that you didn't get and taking action as an adult to try and get you closer to those things will be very helpful and will make you feel very happy.

Another question would be what memories do I always go back to when I think about the times that I was the happiest and you can always just think about you know, when you think about your childhood, where do you usually go back to? Now, some of us might go back to the negative, but like, let's think about the positive. And for me, said,

it was always going back to my sister's house. It was summer in general, and I always have this memory of when it was summer and I was with my mom and we'd always go to the library and look through books and things like that. Like I didn't really even know what we were looking at, Like obviously knew we were at the library looking for books, but it just felt so calm and peaceful because obviously I was around my mom, but just being in the library and it was so big and it was so

spacious. Like that's another thing. Every single time I see libraries in movies and or I go to an actual library, it just cultivates this energy of how I used to feel when I was with my mom doing those things, and so I am never not inclined to go to a library. And honestly, one of the things that I want in my home is a library because

I want that feeling again. And once you get a little bit clear on what actually makes you feel, really good being outside, being inside, being at the library, not being at the library, being around nature, being around friends, being around body who really loves you, spending time dancing wellsten to certain music, different genres of music, spending your time cleaning, painting, organizing, whatever it is that makes you feel really good in the moment.

You need to start doing those things. You need to start implementing little aspects of those things into your life. We don't have to wait until we actually have the suburban home to cultivate a space where we feel like, yes, you know, I'm not only getting towards that dream home, but I can feel and emulate that same essence of how I felt when I was a child. Do you know how many times that I have cultivated that feeling as much as I possibly could in my own room, over and over and over

again. And I continue to do that with every environment that I'm in until I actually get that home. I have been doing that for years. The memory that I think about being at my sister's house was when I was like, I don't even know, let's say I was like eight years old. I have lived. I think this place that I live in now is my fifteenth place that I've lived in. Maybe even sixteen, I lived in many, many different homes because my parents didn't have a lot of money. We

were either getting evicted or we had to move here or there. You know, when my mom was going through her stuff with her addictions, and oh my dad passed away. There was so much moving. And of course when I went to school, college, back and forth, whatever, I had many different spaces, and I made sure every single space that I lived in made me feel as much as home as I possibly could. I made sure

that my room was organized the best way that I could. It was spacious, it felt luxury, It felt like literally the essence of when I went to my sister's home. Even though I didn't have the pool, even though I didn't have the huge mansion or even the staircase where I was playing with my sister, I made sure to cultivate a space that made me feel super

safe the same way that I did in that home. And even when it comes to the backyard in the pool, I never had that obviously, but every time that I would go out, I would go to parks, I would go to even friends houses that maybe had a pool or a nice backyard. I would really jump on any opportunity to bring me closer to what it felt like being at my sister's house. And there's so many times, especially in the summer right where you know, maybe I'm not around an in ground

pool or at a big home, but I feel that same feeling. When I go onto my balcony and I'm journaling in the morning, I can feel the essence of the safety and the suburban lifestyle, let's say, or when I go on hawk Grow walks like it brings me back to this feeling of what I felt when I was safe in childhood, and I want to continue to do that. So really trying to have little habits and things in your life that will bring you back to that feeling. It doesn't need to be

the exact same thing. And that's what we think. And it's interesting. I'm gonna tell you a quick story. I go to a women's circle every Monday. One of the girls in the group, she had asked the facilitator, that's not the right word to say, but facilitator and I'm not saying

mysmatic therapist because there was another girl there that was leading. It was actually it was our women circle, but we were getting trained and we were talking about being a woman and feminine energy and womanhood and sisterhood and all that kind of stuff, so it was kind of more of a training thing. Anyways, she had asked her a question because she was kind of struggling with something in her life. And I'm not going to go into details, but she

was just basically saying, how she has this. She works in a certain industry, and although she loves the industry and she's working and she's grinding and whatever, she has this desire in this poll to want to live on a farm, Like she just wants to escape and just go into the abyss and just live on a farm and have her land and be with her family and

like whatever. And she's struggling with that because she has this desire, but she's like in the city and she's hustling and she's bustling, and like what you know, that's a big jump. And honestly, in my head, I was kind of answering the question for her, not in a place of being like, oh, I know the answer, but I was thinking, Okay, if my friend came to me and had the same issue, Like what would the advice that I would give her, What would it be.

And then obviously I heard the facilitator and what she told her, and it was actually the same thing that I would have said. So she basically said, you know, it's so good to tap into the fact that you really have this desire, right but you want to go in that direction. You don't need to have the farm right now in order for you to experience your desire in life, Like you don't have to literally pick up and move across

the world. What are some things in your immediate life right now that you can start bringing in that will make you feel a little bit closer to that desire? And she had asked her, are there things that you're doing in your life that kind of emulate that same vibe of like living on a farm and just like being in nature and whatever. And she's like, well, yeah, actually, like you know, I make sure that I do a lot of planting in my little like space that I have. I have a

little bit of a garden. I make sure to go outside and go to parks and things like that. And when she was listening those things out, I think she didn't even realize that she was actually cultivating that life, but she was so focused on like it has to be me being on the farm

in order for me to actually feel like I'm living out my desire. And she didn't realize that actually she kind of was, you know, even though she didn't have the full blown life yet, she did have so many pockets of her time in her life where she was connecting to nature and she was gardening, and she was kind of cultivating this life that she eventually wants to

be in. And I think sometimes we don't even see what's in front of our face, and we can't even be in the present moment enough to see that the thing that we are desperately wanting is right in front of our faces. And if you think about it from a terms of like a law of attraction standpoint, and you don't If you don't believe that, then that's fine.

But I think you really need to become that change if you're going to can create more opportunities and more space in your life to actually get the suburban life or go live on the farm, or go travel like you're not really going to manaf us all these opportunities, and you're not even gonna be able to see ways in which you can create that life when you are not focused on what's in front of you. You're not grateful for what's in front of

you. You're not being in the present moment and exuding the feeling of being safe, of being at peace, of feeling like you were when you were at your sister's house at the pool party. So it's just to remind yourself. When we're bringing it back to like romanticizing your life, these little things that you can do, these tweaks in your day that will make you feel more like you did when you first experience that feeling when you were in childhood,

or even if you've never experienced that feeling before. Again, we desire to have the home, we desire to have the family, to have the connection with people. But we can really start to feel that right now if we decide instead of being like, oh, it's too far, I can't

have it. I don't even know how it's going to happen, like it's just it's you know, and then we kind of like crush ourselves and we really go into this all or nothing thinking and bringing it back to thinking about how I used to look at romanticizing my life and creating my dream life. It was so hard for me to even do that because I was stripping any sort of joy out of my life. I would tell myself, I need to feel a one hundred percent like I one hundred percent have this thing or

nothing at all. And that's really not how you get things in your life. You need to kind of start small. So essentially, what I'm saying is in your adult life, start to tap into things that make you feel good. And thinking about even last summer, some of the things that made me feel really good was spiritual morning routines, getting on my balcony really early in the morning and journaling, watching a lot of spiritual videos, watching videos

on feminine energy. I was super into that. I love that and it just made me feel so good. Like, tap into the things, the content, the people, the photos, wherever you're spending your time, what makes you feel good. And again, sometimes we like to strip that and be like, oh no, we can't have this, Like I shouldn't be sitting here right now I'm watching these videos even though it literally feels so good for you just to sit down and watch a video somebody talking about a topic

that you love. But do it and stop telling yourself that you can't or that you should or that it's wrong or that it's not enough, or even if it's like scrolling on Pinterest or taking cute photos of yourself when you're on a hot girl walk, go do that. So I ask you guys on the Glow Up Secrets podcast Instagram, which makes sure that you're following that, because that's where I'm going to get all your submissions. Now, I ask

you guys what you do to romanticize your life. So I wanted to read out some of the things just for you guys to get maybe some inspo, because you know, there is definitely room for you to get inspiration and motivation from people because maybe you've never tried. Maybe you don't know like what's going to make you feel good, right, And that's why it's so good to

just try these things. Bringing it back to the girl wanting to live on a farm, well maybe you don't actually really need to go live on a farm or travel across the whole entire world and live this whole entire life. Really there's little things in your day that you could actually implement which would make you feel so much more at ease and safe. And you realize, like, there's no rush, I don't need to live on the farm or Okay, yeah, maybe I still want to do that, but it doesn't need

to be right now. I'm fine, and that's how I live my life. You know, the times where I did not like my reality, I made sure to create a space in my home that felt safe to me so I didn't feel like I was longing or that the life that I really wanted was so far away, because realistically I was living it just then in that moment, even when around me it was not safe. Okay, so someone said, I go for slow walks only by myself with homemade coffee when it's

sunny. I love the homemade coffee. Something about making your coffee at home really hits, especially in the summertime. Someone said, yoga candles while studying, taking music from TV shows and listening to that while I do stuff aka being the main character. I love that. Getting dressed up and having a wonderful breakfast at a cute cafe, savoring every bite. Yes see, it's about really indulging and being in that present moment when it comes to romanticizing your

life. I buy flowers for myself, take myself on solo dates, be creative, art slash decorating another one is read with some tea in a wood wick candle in the background, crackling love that. I love how you guys are pointing out different sounds or tastes or smells, just like the pleasures of life, because that's really what it is. It's the feminine. It's the indulging in the present moment. It's being here now. I love that. Someone said making everything cute, like my robe, my mug, journal outfit,

etc. Yeah, like even those small things. Having a cute mug and just deciding like this is my cute mug and this is the thing that it's going to help me feel like I'm safe and i am sound and I'm living my best life. Then do that. Sometimes I'll listen to podcasters that I really love on YouTube and just have my coffee and I just feel so at peace. And it doesn't take much. I don't need to have a bunch of money in my bank account or to be having this luxury lifestyle or

to be looking cute. I just literally simply need my homemade coffee and a video on a topic that I'm obsessed with. Someone said, coffee and a hat girl walk getting myself lunch somewhere new and hot girl drives. I love that. Someone said journaling with incense and cards every morning. That's something I do in the morning. And now I don't need to set an alarm because I know that I'm gonna wake up early. But I also work for myself,

so I don't need to do that. So I have my phone in the living room and I just leave it there, and in the morning, I take my time getting up and open up my blinds, and I will set an incense candle, and I will start journaling, and I will have If I'm not on the balcony, I'll open my door for a moment and just smell the fresh air and just have such a peaceful morning routine. And again, it just it brings me back to the summer mornings. Someone said

making a playlist to set the mood. Someone said acting like housework is fun. I love that. I actually really like cleaning and organizing. That was something that I love to do. When I was younger as well. I used to go to my sister's house and she had the messiest room of all time, and every time I would go over, I would clean her room. I just loved it, and she obviously loved me for doing it,

and so did her mom. We had the same dad, different mom, by the way, And yeah, I just found so much peace and calm in organizing and cleaning, and so I love to do that as well. And that's why another reason why I just want to I love homes. I love homes, I love organizing, I love decor. Someone said, hawk grow walks, watching the sunrise, drinking green juices, going outside often. Someone said, remind myself that working hard towards something I love is an act

of self care. Love that writing down traits I wish to embody and rewrite them as though I'm in an inspiring narrative. I love that I do that a lot. Like in the morning when I'm writing, I write as if I already am this person. So I already have the life that I want. I already have the success. I have the love for myself. I have my home, I have my whatever. Someone said, read outdoors.

I definitely wanted to start doing so much more reading outdoors. Lately. I've been listening to my audio books again and just doing hawk Grow walks, because you know, I go to the gym a lot, so I listen to lot of music. Then, so I'm kind of over doing the walks with listening to music. Ah, though sometimes I'll do that if I'm in the mood, but to slow things down. Oh my gosh, I just I

freaking love hawk row walks. Kelly one of my girlies, she said, she sits in the sun, eyes closed, face up, trying to breathe in sunlight, listen to music I love without being concerned if others like it too. This, this, like this. It comes back to the whole messages that I've been saying for romanticizing your life. It's going to be so unique to you. Start doing what feels good to you, stop caring about what everyone else is saying. And you know, you want to say that

you're going on a hawk o walk. Say it. You like the fact that you call it a hawk ro walk, call it a freaking hawk ro walk. If you don't like the term hawk row walk, and you just you're somebody who's like, oh my god, it's just a walk, then be that too, you know, like literally, just be yourself. Do whatever feels good to you. Someone said, paint, play, piano journal, swim. Oh my gosh, I cannot wait to swim. I love

swimming. Someone said, my housing, wherever I live, may it be a humble cottage or a city condo, I try to tap into the vibe. I really like that. Like, you know, it doesn't matter where you're living or what you're doing, you are really being in that present. And that's something that I try to do as well. You know, sometimes we're so fixated on having our space a certain way right, or we're fixated on what we really want in our lives and we don't have it yet that

we don't really enjoy the present moment. And now, no matter where I

go, I make everything a vibe. Like I was saying in my summer video, how I'm going to the Stampede, Calgary Stampede in July, and I'm making it a whole entire thing, like I'm making it my whole identity seriously to be this like coastal cowgirl, and I'm just gonna enjoy it, and I'm gonna get outfits me and my friend guys, and you know what, I know, you guys are gonna judge me, but my friend and I my best friend enjoy and i'd we're going and we literally may a deck

of all of our outfits that are going to make every single day. I pulled outfits on Pinterest and we also came up with the theme of the name of each day. Oh my gosh, and you guys will definitely see it because I'm gonna make a vlog of some sort. So yeah. Anyways, it's just making things fun, like just be fun. Someone said, drink my water out of my wine glass. Currently a pregnant mommy, I love that, And congratulations on being perregnant. I love that. I'll definitely do

that when I'm pregnant, because what the heck? Someone said, Notice the pretty things, birds, butterflies, sun rays, good coffee. Yes, again, bringing it back to the present moment where we're at right now. Sometimes we get so in our heads and we want to have this picture perfect life, but really, like, look at what's in front of you. Somebody else said, I ponder over how everywhere I turn, everything is there to serve me and make my life easier. To elaborate, she said,

for example, a light bulb was there to give me electricity. A pen is there to give me the ability to write if I want to. Curtains are there to give me privacy. Literally everything on this planet is here to make me sorry, to make my life more smooth and provide me with something. Even the painful things, they're all lessons and you can't lose this.

We're just gonna We're gonna end it on that, because that is my mindset with everything, like truly, and I think that it just allows you to be to live a more peaceful life and to be happy when you realize that everything here is for you and it's not against you, and even the hard things in life, you know, it's hard to just pull out all the wisdom and the lessons from those things, and you don't even need to do that at that moment if you're going through something hard, but you know,

to empower yourself and make you feel better. In my personal opinion, the best way to look at things is everything is here for me. Because when I start thinking about, oh, this is against me, or I can't get things, or this is there's not a reason why this is happening, it makes me feel very disempowered, and then I stay in this negative energy and I stay in this unhappiness and I don't want to be unhappy. I don't want to not enjoy my life. And there has been so many mindset

shifts that I had to make throughout my years. But there was a time where I would stress about everything, I worry about everything, and I would constantly think that everything was against me. And I don't ever want to feel like that again. And it's going to be up to us, Like it is our mindset shifts that allow us to be in the present moment. It is us deciding to do certain things in our lives to romanticize our lives and

enjoy it that is going to allow us to feel good. It starts with you, ain't nobody going to feel good until you decide to feel good. Sometimes what we do is, again we wait for something outside of ourselves to

make us feel good. And although that can be definitely a part of life, especially when it comes to relationships or people in your life, Like yes, but we need to learn how to feel good even in the moment when we don't have the suburban lifestyle yet, or you know, we don't have the ideal environment that we're living in yet, or maybe it's winter and we can't do all of the hawk girl walks that we want, or maybe the person that we really want to be with is not with us right now,

or they're acting weird or they're not whatever. It's so important that we learn how to sustain that feeling of happiness and peace within ourselves, and it starts with these little things. It starts with bringing ourselves back to those memories where we feel the best, or being aware of when we go out in the world and what feels good to us and what doesn't feel good to us,

and to do more of what feels good to us. And on top of that, stop judging ourselves for when we want to feel good right, because we still have that maybe critical mindset from whoever or whatever, wherever the hell we pick that up that might be judging us or telling ourselves, no, it's wrong, we need to do it this way, or romanticizing your life looks like this and not like that, or just in general you stripping all joy and happiness out of your life, like we can no longer do that,

and you know it will take practice, for sure, But the small little things allow yourself to enjoy and have fun and life gets to be easy. That's the thing, you know. I think there's a lot of guilt and a lot of thoughts that we have towards actually allowing ourselves to be happy, and we've been conditioned sometimes through society that things need to be hard and they can't be easy, and that's just not the reality I live in.

And I used to and I tried to create abundance in my life and relationships and money, opportunities, everything that I wanted my life from this place of burning myself out of place of me telling myself that I had to work extremely hard and life had to be hard for me to get these things, And it's just conditioning, it's just limiting beliefs. It seriously is it's just the

story that you're telling yourself. It doesn't need to be hard. And you know what, maybe I should talk about that next week, but let me know if you would like me to talk about that. I think that we need to talk again about the stories that we tell ourselves and how that can be so limiting and how we perceive things to be what they're not based off of what we've learned in the past. But that creates more crappy situations in

our lives sometimes. And it's going to be up to you to change your perspective of how you can receive things in your life, how you can get things in your life. If you think that everything is going to be hard and it's gonna be a lot of discipline, and it's gonna be boring, and it's gonna be this like burnout situation and that's the only way you're going to get what you want in your life, then that's going to be your

reality. If you think that things come to you easy, that it gets to be easy, that you're easy to love, that love is easy to have, that money is easy to have, that there's opportunities everywhere, there's abundance everywhere, you're gonna start getting things just as easy. And that's the life that I live. So let me know if you guys want to talk about that again, just message me on the podcast channel or even on my Instagram. But yeah, I hope you guys enjoyed this episode and I'll talk

to you guys in the next one. Bye.

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