Hi, everyone, Welcome back to another podcast episode. My name is Alicia Gogan, the host of the Globe Seats podcast, where I help you expand your mind and become more self aware so that you can glow up into the best version of yourself. Okay, guys, I am so excited to talk about spring, like to the point where this whole episode is just going to be about spring, but in particular, we do have a few q and
as to get through. I want to talk about body confidence because I feel like, naturally when we move into the spring and summertime, what comes up. We think about our bodies, we think about the way that we look. And you guys had some questions and you wanted some advice, So we're going to talk about that. You guys ask me a lot on Instagram of
my summer plans and the vibes for the spring summer. Y'll also talked about FOMO and saving money throughout the summer when everyone wants to do a million things. So we're gonna talk about that and a few updates on what's been going on. Okay, So this weekend, I have been doing a vlog. I've been vlogging my activities for the whole weekend, and I really want to do a Summer in the City series. I've seen. Her name is Danielle Carolyn. She's a New York City vlogger. I feel like some of you
guys might know her, some of you might not. I remember her doing some sort of Summer in the Cities series last I don't know if it was last summer or the summer before when she moved to New York because she wanted to do like a bunch of things and just like live her life. And I feel like that's me but in Toronto. So I think that I'm going to do some sort of vlog series. Well I am, because I've already
started it, and just I don't know a vlog. You know, all of the things that I do, all of the lessons that I'm learning, all the challenges that I'm putting myself through, all the realizations and the wisdom, because you guys know, I'm all about that. So I'm really excited
to start that on my main channel. We'll see, obviously, I even said in the video, like we're gonna see if it works for me as a creator, and we're also going to see if it works for you guys, because you know, I understand that sometimes when you just vlog your daily life it's kind of boring. But I feel like I want to give you guys as much value as possible. And if there's cool things that I can show you in realizations that I'm coming to and I can talk to you guys
about that, then I would love to do that. So we'll see. I don't know if it's going to be like every single weekend, because not every weekend I do something, especially when I'm on my period, like hello,
Gurly, we are keeping it calm. I also feel like during the week, I don't really know if i'd be like a week during the week vlogger, just because I do kind of the same things and I kind of want to keep low during the week, like waking up, writing, going to the gym, eating kind of the same types of foods, like nothing too crazy, and then of course recording my podcast, doing lots of editing, recording YouTube videos, all that kind of stuff. So we'll see.
We'll just add some flare into the content and we'll see how you guys like it. Let me know any thoughts. I also ask you guys on Instagram if you guys wanted that, and a lot of you guys said you did, so we'll see. Also, I did my photoshoot for the podcast, and guys, I think you're really gonna love the photos. I don't know what I'm getting them all. They should be soon, and I had a
few different outfits and a few different vibes. I don't want to give too much away, and I need to also once I get the photos back, I need to then do some editing to like actually have the text on the photo for the podcast art and all that kind of stuff. So we'll see. But I am so excited to rebrand and to show you guys. I feel like this photoshoot was really big for me. It wasn't just the fact that I got a photo shoot done for the podcast to make it look more
professional and more great. It's just this is really a reflection of me becoming the most authentic version of myself and glowing up into the best version of myself.
Like I am the most glowed up version of myself in these photos, and that is the type of feeling and vibe that my photographer and I wanted to go for so that when somebody sees this podcast art they know what they're getting and they feel like welcomed to this podcast, and they feel like they can see themselves in me in any way, not just the fact that like the way that I look, but I guess you'll see when you actually see the photos and like how I look. But oh my gosh, I'm so
excited. And I also wore my natural hair, which is really big for me. I like fully, fully, fully love embracing my hair now, and it's been such a long journey for me. I've said this in multiple videos before on my YouTube, but you know, growing up around people who didn't have the same hair texture type as me and like just not being in
that nurturing environment. My mom did as best as she could. She's a white curly We love her, but um, you know, she didn't come from a home where she learned how to deal with really you know, curly curly hair. And also there just wasn't that many moms around as well that knew how to deal with like black hair, and so growing up, I just didn't love my hair. I wanted to look like everyone else and I did that and I tried that and it just like I've said many times,
I ruined my hair. I hated my hair. So it's been a very long journey. And I'm sure any of you who are like mixed or black, you guys know that journey. And it's so nice to now be in that category of like it is, I fully embraced my hair and I love my hair. And I just think about when I have children, how that will not even be a reality for them to look at their hair like it's anything but amazing. And it's just crazy how this, honestly society has been
evolving, if you just think about it. I'm sure any of you guys who were like around my age, I'm twenty seven years old, you know, when we grew up, there was not a lot of people who had the same hair as us, unless you lived in like that community, like a black community, or you know, everyone kind of look like you. That's still but even even then, I feel like, you know, we're taught to purm our hair and to hate our hair and to not you know,
just to manipulate it like crazy. And I just see like the younger generation growing up and when they all have curly hair, they're all just like embracing it, and it's like so normal to love your hair, and I think that's so beautiful, and I just think about when I have children, how that's just like good, that's going to be the reality to look at their hair and be like this is this is beautiful and amazing. Also not to beg on anyone who doesn't have curly hair, because y'all got good hair
too, Like everyone has great hair. Okay, but anyways, I digress. I say that to say this photoshoot meant a lot to me and it was literally the most perfect, seamless process ever and it was so much deeper than just getting a photo taken of me professionally for a podcast. Okay, so let's get into the Q and A, and let's talk about summer. Let's get excited for spring. Well we're in spring, but spring summer vibes. I am living, you guys. You guys are also living. I
know you guys are living for this weather. Wherever you're at, I'm assuming, well, unless you're like in Australia or somewhere where it would be switched I think, or you kind of just live somewhere where it's already warm, like God bless your soul. But for the majority of us, we are waking up out of our slumbers and the sun is out, and literally, you know what I just thought about the other day, It's like I don't even need coffee when the sun is out, because that is all I need
to just get my ass up and just enjoy life. I swear it is such. It's like literally day and night to be in warm weather and the sun being out, like it's just crazy, and I'm so here for it, and I'm going to capitalize on everything like I always do usually in the summer when it comes to just like spending time outside and the fresh air and the sun. And I'm so happy that we are going to have like six months of this now and this is the time for us to really really thrive.
And I hope you guys are in that same energy. I know winter can be very difficult and there's so many things that we've all been through this past year, and I just want to commend to you guys and just be like, Hi, we're here, we are here, we made it, we went through whatever we went through, and let's get excited for the spring,
for the summer. Let's feel amazing. Let's enjoy life, because that is really what we are here to do is having a conversation with one of my friends yesterday, and she had all of these goals to you know, have this career of her dreams, and you know, she's really just focused on all these goals. And of course we are human beings, we want
that in our lives. But I told her, because I've been through this constantly, I've always been on a self improvement journey, healing, always had goals, always in survival mold, always always always going, going, going, And I said, listen, something and I've really learned over the past few years, which is totally not me, is like you need to live in the present moment. You need to be here and be okay with the process and being okay with the in between and not being where you want to
be yet. And I even said to her, once you stop resisting everything and like wanting something so bad and telling yourself you must have this end goal, this body, this amount of money, the career, before you feel happy with your life, you will start to realize that everything in the in between, you living in the present moment, the people that you meet. When you stop getting in your head and you start living in the present moment
and you start going out and living your life and not holding back. You will realize all these people, these places, these experiences, these things are what is actually going to get you to that goal a lot quicker. And it's crazy. It's like we again, we focus on the goal. We want the body, we want the money, we want something so much, and we're so attached to that, and the process feels so long, it feels hard, it feels like it's never ending. We feel like we're not
living. And if we just release that resistance and detach, you will realize all the things in the in between are what's actually going to get us what we really really want. Let's say, for instance, you want a really cool job opportunity, and you are so fixated on getting this, and like you have this certain path and you have to take this course, and you have to go here at this time, and you gotta do interviews, you
gotta do lada, all these things. Of course that might be your process and what you need to do. And sometimes we get so tied up on that to the point where we don't actually live in the moment and we let's say, don't go to that one event that we got invited to by a friend, who's in an industry. We feel like it's not really gonna get us anywhere, so we just don't go or you know, we don't go out for a walk, we don't go to a coffee shop to work.
We just don't do anything because we're so focused on that outcome, which is great in some aspects. But the thing is, sometimes when you go out to that event or you go out for a walk, and you see somebody and you have a connection and you talk, that person actually could be your answer to the job that you wanted, or to the opportunity, the connection that you needed, that would get you there a lot faster if you actually
were in the present moment and you lived your life. So I just want to remind you that, and that's something that I've been heavily challenged myself when it comes to living, is to live here now in the present moment, stopping in your head so much, stop holding off on life, stop not living life because you don't have something, trust that it's going to come detached from the outcome. And yeah, anyways, let's get into it, all
right. So a lot of you guys asked what my summer plans are, So I wrote a few out, I'm not going to like, well, I'll probably talk for a long time. You got you guys know this. But I wrote like plans that I have. I think when I looked at plans, I thought of goals as well, so they're kind of like interchangeable, I guess. So I did some for myself projects and things that I'm going to be working on, and then like actual plans and things that I
want to do. So my main plan aka goal for myself this summer is honestly to challenge myself. I know there's certain things that I stay comfortable in, certain behaviors that I do, certain personas that I have, certain things that I do in my life that keep me safe, and I know at this point in my life that those are the things that I need to challenge and those are the things I need to step out of if I want the
life that I say that I want. And that is the most That is the most challenging thing that we all have to come to and a lot of people don't ever do it. It is too uncomfortable. Sometimes we don't have the tools to be able to actually go through uncomfortable things, which obviously I've done a lot of work on myself to be able to, you know, stand up and be like I can challenge myself, I can push myself. I can you know, take off the mask. I can be myself authentically.
I can really like say what I want and go for exactly what I want to have confidence within myself. And it takes a little bit to get there, but I'm at a point where that's what i want to do, so anytime and I'm this is the thing, I am so self aware of myself. Like I'm very aware of when I'm going back into old behaviors, old thought patterns, you know, thinking a certain way, putting on a mask because I'm scared for people to see me, things of that nature.
And I'm very aware of when I'm doing that, and what I want to challenge myself in those times is to step out of that comfort zone. Let me give you a quick example when it comes to guys, because I feel like a lot of girls will have this. It can relate to this. So when you're talking to somebody and you really like them, especially if they're kind of new, you want to put your best foot forward. You want to look amazing, you want to look cute. All the time, you
want to say the right things. You want to just be amazing, your amazing self that you are, but you just want to be great. And the thing is is you don't always actually need to be pitture perfect, you don't always have to look amazing, you don't always have to speak amazing. You can mess up your words, you can be messy, you can do all of these things. But we're so scared to do that. So let's
say I'm afraid to do that. But on the flip side, my goal is to have a deep, meaningful relationship with someone, A deep, meaningful, loving, connected relationship with someone. Well, that is going to require me to take off my mask. That is going to require me to let myself be messy and somebody see me and for that person to actually obviously accept me and love me. And there's obviously going to be people who like maybe that you're an a their cup of tea and whatever. But at the end
of the day, a healthy relationship is not perfect. A healthy relationship, a really deep bond with someone is that person that sees you in all of your glory, all your ups, all your downs, all your everything. So there's gonna be days where you don't look perfect. There's gonna be days where you don't say the right things. And every time you be your authentic self, that is really a chance for you to actually go deeper with someone.
And you're not going to be able to really go that deep with someone if you don't do that, if you don't become yourself, you don't let yourself be yourself. And also what I found, especially for the girls, is you know the right guy. Obviously not every man is like this, but the men who are really looking for that one, they want to see
you. They want to see the real you, your core, your authentic version of yourself, the one that is not always putting on a front, the one that is not always pitture perfect and pretty and just everything like that. And that's what I'm looking for as well. But it's like how I'm saying I want all these things, I'm saying I want authentic relationship, I want a deep connection, I want deep this and that. Okay, well you cannot have that if you have all of these blocks, these walls,
these masks on you. And so it's going to be different for everyone. Sometimes it's more of a body image thing. Sometimes it's just our mindset.
Sometimes it's whatever we hit we are insecure about. But in those times where you, let's say you're talking to somebody and you feel like you're going to put on that mask again, that's where I would be could become very aware and be like Alicia, you're about to put a mask on because you usually do and it's comfortable, but you are safe to take off this mask. And maybe there is a risk. There are always as a risk to taking off your mask, right, But I would much rather take off my mask
at this point and be myself and hopefully that person likes me. If they don't, they don't then to continue to have this mask on, because I am sick and tired of that, and that is not what's going to get me what I really want. And the end goal is a deep loving connection.
And you know, I see all the little wounds that I have, all the things that i've you know, put in my shadow, and those are the things that I'm trying to reintegrate this year, because again I think that life, when we really can see it for what it is, it's really meant for you to see all those wounds, heal them and express yourself and be yourself we are so especially as women, we're so oh my gosh,
we're so programmed. We have so many masks, we have so many shadows, we have so much shame, we have guilt, we are scared, we are nervous, we're everything. And it's just like, I don't want to be that. I don't want to be that anymore. And I know that that's not going to get me healthy relationships, even outside of romantic relationships, like friendships as well. It's like we want these girlfriends, sisterhood, we want all these things, but we won't We're not willing to take
a risk. And I told my friend this the other day. Even when it comes with love, comes to love, I told her, I said, there's always there's always going to be a risk when it comes to love. There is going to be a rest, that your heart is going to get hurt, you know. And I don't set myself up for thinking that, like, oh I'm going to get hurt. No, I don't do that, do that, But I have in the back of my head like, you know what, there's always going to be a rest. But I
don't care because what I want is I want love. I want something deep, I want something meaningful. I want a meaningful life, and that is going to require me to get uncomfortable. And it's like, we want to have an amazing relationship, amazing career, all the money, time, freedom, we want it all, but the way that we want to get it is to stay comfortable, is to stay in our shell, is to keep the mask on, and that's not that is literally not how it works.
So my goal for myself is to become aware of when I am putting any sort of mask on in any situation. I'm not going to be perfect. I don't always do it, but when I do, to take it off and tell myself in that moment, Alicia, you're about to put this mask on. This is why you feel like you need to put this mask on, But you don't need to do it. It's gonna get in the way of you deeply connecting to someone or getting something that you want in your life.
And I remind myself of that anytime that I see myself doing that, and it's profound, it's actually very healing. And I've done that in relationships before, I've done that in any life before, and honestly, nine times out of ten, when you do that, it's like it's like you quantum leap, you show yourself that it's possible to take off that mask and somebody still love you, somebody still accept you, or you get that opportunity or you know, you don't get rejected. So yeah, that's my self goal.
That was a low rant, but yeah, it's just being seen. I want to allow people to see me and I don't want to be perfect and I want to challenge myself. Okay, projects that I'm going to be working on this summer, the main thing is my book. I need to really get that done hopefully. I don't know whatever we're getting get done. The deadline I think is June. I believe it's June. I'm gonna get done before June anyways, but I'm really excited for that as well. Another
thing, I definitely want to work with some more cool brands. You know what, I'm not gonna say too much again from my photo shoot, but all I gotta say is I really feel like I should model for garage. Okay, I literally buy so many of their tops. And some of the photos that I took at the photo shoot, which I don't know which one I'm using, I was wearing like garage shirts, and I just the way that I had the shoot, it literally looked like I was modeling for garage.
And it's funny because my agents see they'll ask me, like, what
is your dream brand to work with? And I don't really have many because obviously, like you, I don't know if you guys see influencers who work with big brands like Benefit and like all of these cool brands, like that's amazing cool, But I don't really have that in my head, mainly because my biggest goal with working with brands is to have a collaboration that makes sense for my audience and make sense for my content and makes sense for me as
a creator, like something that I really use, something that I really back, something that just makes perfect sense, or something to bring to you guys that is affordable or even if it's like expensive I don't know, depending on the brand, right, or sometimes it's not even a product, but whatever it is, it makes sense for you guys and it's really good, and
I obviously like that is my main goal. I don't want to just work with a brand just because like, oh, they're like a huge brand, like Okay, like Adidas, Like I want to work with the Didas just because there're Adidas. Like, if it makes sense for my brand to work with Adidas and amazing, then that would be my dream brand. But if it does, if I never wear Adidas or I never use it or like
I never whatever, then it just yeah. So anyways, I was just thinking from that photo shoot, that would be so amazing to work with Garage because I love their clothes. Like listen, I know some of their clothes are basically like gen Z, like younger crowds, but I feel like with my body type the type of shirts that I wear, they're they're smaller, they're like little cutesy whatever, and I find that I just really like their clothes, especially their top. So that would be cool if I could work
with them. But in general, I would love to work with more brands and just do more brand work because it's just it's honestly so fun to be able to work with a brand and create content for them, post content for them. I'm not even going to cap Obviously. Money is a big part of why people work with brands, like obviously, and I have financial goals this summer this year, ever, like always, I feel like we all do, and I'm trying to save my money. Baby won't save it,
but also invest it. So definitely a thing. What else did it? Right? Oh? Create more interactive YouTube videos, which it already told you guys, like the vlog series. I would like. That's going to be so fun. I think, just to document my life as well in a way that is helpful hopefully also furnish my place. I okay, I'm really manifesting having my couch get here sooner than later. But they told me it's going to come the third week of April, and then two days later she
said actually mid May. And I swear that girl lied to me when she told me, because I asked her when is it going to be available, because obviously when you buy a couch, you want to get it now. But I feel like she just told me that so I can just buy it because it's like not that long anyways. Whatever annoying not annoying. We're not annoyed at all. This couch. I cannot wait to show you guys. It'll definitely be in like the vlogs and stuff. Also, if you're watching
on YouTube, this back area. I've been thinking like what to get there, like what to put there? I wanted to do some prints, but what I'm thinking I can do is get like a little like a shelf, like something like that. I know you guys can't see if you're listening, and then have like some artwork here. I don't know. I'm still trying to figure it out. I did get a nice big mirror as well, but I just want to furnish the place and make it look really beautiful.
Okay, plans what you guys really ask for. As the plans, There's definitely going to be things like like the weekend stuff that I don't really have plan until like the week of Like me and my friend just went to a rooftop last night, which is great. I'm going to a farmer's market or like a market after I filmed this. Actually, I'm just like down to do anything around the city. There's like a million things, so I'm not going to list everything, like me and my friends all have like lists of
like shops, places to go whatever. But I definitely want to do a picnic with the girls though. That'd be so cute. But I did write on my list brand events, which I've been going to a lot of cool brand events also explore the city, like I said, definitely have plans to do more therapy and more. I'm doing my Women's circle again, which is going to be starting. I supposed to start next week, but I don't know if it's if she's pushing it or not. Also totally look into women's
circles around your area if you want, but just more healing work. We love that. I'm also going to be going to Calgary in July for the Calgary Stampede. So if anyone lives in Calgary, like, let me know, message me, and if you're going or you live there, like, let me know, girl, I'm probably gonna go. I'm gonna go for a little bit because I know someone there and it might be like a month
thing, so you might be getting some Calgary content. I'm gonna go to Veld for sure because love a good music festival and Central Sea is going and like you know, my obsession with him rolling Loud. I'm definitely gonna go. I don't know when it is. They haven't even dropped the line up yet, but we're definitely gonna go. I want to do some more day festivals, like day things like I love guys. I am a day girly like let's go early as possible so I can get home by twelve o'clock latest
and go to sleep. So I I know that there's this thing called the Toronto Islands. If you're not, if you don't live in Toronto, where they do a lot of like little day music festival vibes. I know sometimes they're a little bit odd, like some of the people that go there are doing some things, interesting things, but then there's some that are just like
amazing. So I'd love to explore that because I've never actually been. I've only been to Toronto Islands once and it's beautiful, and I think that would just be even more Like it'd be such a vibe to go there and listen to some music. I definitely want to do some more like beach yoga, like breathwork things outside and really get more into like the healing community, the
spiritual community in Toronto. I am a very balanced girly Like I can go to the club if you want, which don't usually love, but like I could do that and like rock out with you, but I could also be up at like seven am going for a cold water dip and doing breathwork on the beach. Also summer cottage house. Me and my friends are totally going to do this. I don't know when we were thinking, maybe, like I don't know if it was May. No, we're going to do that
at the end of the summer. I think, well kind of the end, like Labor Day weekend. So I definitely want to do that. So if you guys have any recommendations, and also let me know what you're doing so that I can copy you, let me know in the comments. Also, my condo just opened up the terrence, so I cannot wait to go sit out there and watch the sunset. Hopefully I can watch the sunset. I don't know where it's actually positioned because I've never been there. It wasn't
open when I came and actually looked at this condo. Just to sit out there and have a little vibe going with some music and just chilling and relaxing, I cannot wait. I just can't wait for anything anything to do with warm weather. I'm here, all right. Let's get into the next question. Someone asks, can you talk about self confidence when it comes to wearing bikinis? Oh my gosh, I remember the days when I was like in high school and my whole entire focus was was I going to be bikini ready?
Like that was as soon as January hit. Honestly, Rory March, like it was just all I was thinking about all the time. And then I never got to that point where I felt like I was bikini ready. And then I literally put my whole entire life on hold and just thought, Okay, maybe next year, maybe next year, And I was just so uncomfortable and so unhappy with myself. So I definitely know the struggle. I
feel like so many of us go through it. And you know what, I understand the movement on social media where they say your body is a bikini body because you just have a body, like you don't need to have a certain shape or anything to wear a bikini, and it's so true. But I know when you guys are saying, like you want to feel like bikini ready or whatever, I understand that you still have this desire to want to
look your best, like we all do. So it's really not to beg on the body positivity movement, and I think it's beautiful that we have that movement, but I am also going to honor and recognize the part of us that does want to look our best. And does want to fit in and does want to just look amazing. So one thing before we even get to, you know, honoring that part of us is honestly to remind yourself that
it is totally fine that you don't look like everyone else. Like I ask myself the question sometimes not really anymore because I just don't I don't compare myself like this. I do have a lot of videos on this, by the way, But you know when you go to the beach and you realize that you don't look like those other girls and everyone looks amazing, like better than you in your head, okay, and what so let's just like come to the realization that okay, you know what, yeah, these people look better
than me. Everyone has a nice body. And then what well, obviously that makes you feel like crap. But it's like, but the world is still spinning, like we're still gonna be okay, Like everyone is gonna be fine even when you don't have this bikini body. It's like we look at it as we it's like death if we don't have this body, and it really does feel like that, because what's really underneath the feeling of like death
is I'm not worthy I'm not connected, I'm not loved. And the truth is, if you're around the right people, obviously you will be accepted and loved and valued. Regardless of what your body looks like. Okay, you don't have the skinniest body, you don't have the body that looks like your best friend that looks amazing. Okay, well if she's your best friend and she's great, she's still gonna love you anyways. You know, like, okay, what you're not gonna get chosen by who a guy? Or okay,
what you're not going to have the most picture perfect Instagram photo? Okay, and now what we don't have that? And now what, We're still fine, We're still here. It's a totally fine. So I just want to say that, like, it's honestly, you need to neutralize this idea of like having this bikini body because it shouldn't be that relevant. It honestly shouldn't be that relevant. But again I know that it can be. Obviously,
you just want to look good and feel good. So one thing that you can do when it comes to feeling bikini ready, the beach vibes, whatever, Please find something that looks good on you that you're comfortable in and
you feel as confident as you can in. Listen, There's been times where I have felt ten times more insecure about my body because I was trying to wear bikinis that other girls were wearing, but they didn't have the same body type as me, so I felt even worse, like the fact that I was trying to, you know, hike up my bikini bottoms like everyone else
because it's a trend right now. But then I was like, oh my gosh, I do not like the way that looks, and really my body type, it looks better if I just have them like mid rise or low rise because I already have really big hips. I don't need to hike things up because my hips are already there, Like you can already see the shape without me doing that. And I look so much better with my bikini bottoms just being like midrise. But because I used to try and fit in and
wear them up high, I would hate my body even more. So please find what works for your body, and listen. I know you you might have this thought, well, nothing works for my body. Okay, Well find what looks the best that you possibly can't and you do not need to be perfect bringing it back to the fact that okay, and okay, even if you find a midrise bikini bottom that doesn't look the best and maybe there's a little bit of fat that's like hanging out, okay, and who cares.
Like, at the end of the day, let's neutralize this idea of like you need to not have fat there or you need to whatever. Right, Like again, let's move away from that. But again, what's gonna make you feel a little bit better is wearing something that works with your body. And I remember or honestly even the times now, like some of my friends will be like, oh, you can borrow my bikini or you can
whatever. I have this one friend and her booty is so big, naturally so big, and she just she has shaped like a freaking coke bottle. I think that's how you say it. I don't know. And she has these tiny little bikini bottoms and they look amazing on her. She'll pull them up like girl, get it, but she'll she'll be like, oh you can, like you can borrow one of mine. And I'm my girl.
That's I know my body and I know that I'm not going to feel comfortable in that, and I don't think that I look that flattering in that because I don't have the same body type buzzy. So I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna find the ones that I love. The ones that I love are like the seamless ones, the ones that are not too tight on me, not the little string thongs vibes. I like a little cheeky butt.
But like, you know, one good place also to get bikinis that I got for my Talloon trip is called Black Black Bow bou g H. I believe you can find out on my Instagram. I have a bikini from there, and they have like really nice seamless, like just beautiful bikinis. So but anyways, yeah, like I know the fabrics that will sit well on my body. I know the like the high rise, the midrise, like what looks the best. I know what looks the best on my top half.
So just knowing your body. I was actually watching somebody on TikTok and she was talking about how like majority of people do not know their body type. They don't know how to dress themselves. They just see whatever is in the mall and they pick it up. They might think it's cute or they might get influenced by someone and whatever. But then they put it on and it's like they feel awkward and they feel uncomfortable, and then they don't like
their bodies even more. And it takes a lot of you really getting to know your body and not always trying to follow the trends and everything. Another thing like, just because none of your friends wear cover ups doesn't mean that you can't. Like, I love those little sarongs. I don't know if I'm saying that correctly, the ones that like tie over your hip. If you feel comfortable in that where that if you want to cover up where that
like, there's so many options now that you just you don't. Again, it's this idea of how you think that you need to look and be. Well, if I don't wear a two piece bakini that's hyped up on my hips and has like a little thong whatever and the thing at the top is so tiny, then I'm not gonna be bikini ready. Like, no, find what works for you, and I promise you you're going to look amazing. You're gonna look amazing because you feel comfortable and you feel as confident as
you possibly can in your body. You know the way that you look and people perceive you and like see you. It really comes down a lot of the times to your energy and how you feel in your body. It's not just what you see in front of you. You can tell when somebody's very uncomfortable in their own body and they're wearing clothes that don't fit right, and whatever, wear clothes that fit right, and I promise you you will look
amazing. You'll start to exude this energy of confidence and it'll be sexy, it'll be amazing, and then you'll start to show yourself that you never needed to be like these girls like you never needed to look exactly like these girls like you are beautiful and that is the type of like honestly, that is how you transform this body dysmorphia into looking at yourself like, Wow, I'm actually beautiful. And I've gone through that same journey. I basically have had
the same body that you know I've had in the years. Obviously, fluctuated muscles change things like that, But it's the perception and how I view myself and how I dress myself that I look at myself now and I'm like, wow, my body is like so much different then the past. But it's really it's really not it's just the way that I dress and the way that I look at myself and how comfortable I feel in my own body that honestly changes everything for me and for how people perceive me as well. Also two
more things that I'm gonna say. Obviously, if you're struggling with any sort of body image issues, obviously we need to heal that, do a lot of healing work, self love, self acceptance, all that. I have lots of videos on my main channel. But then there's always going to be that component of the way that you are going to feel confident in yourself is if you're taking care of yourself. Now I'm not saying go to the gym
so you can change your body to look bikini ready. I just mean take care of yourself, because honestly, when you get up every day or every other day, or how how many times you go, and you know that you're taking care of yourself in the gym and you're eating right, then first of all, you should never beg on yourself if you don't look a certain
way. If you're actually taking care of yourself, and on top of that, you're just going to be able to combat those negative beliefs when you are at the beach and you're like, wow, I don't look like that girl. Well you can tell yourself, well, you know what, I'm doing the best that I can. You know, I look the best that I can. I can't do anything else. One last thing before you go to the beach or anywhere, honestly, even just like wearing summer clothes, like
romanticize a little routine before you go. Oil yourself up, like shave your legs, like look amazing, smell amazing again, find that right bikini that looks amazing on you, get dolled up, look your best, and you will feel your best. This is going to lead into the next question where somebody asks, like how to have confidence in summer and like summer bodies in
general. So I'm just assuming summer clothes naturally, we are taking off layers naturally, We're looking at ourselves in the mirror more and we're like, okay, honey, what's going on here? I think it comes back down to finding the makeup routine, the skincare routine, the hair routine, your favorite pairs of jeans, shorts, tops, whatever it is, finding what works
for you. You're always going to feel the most confident. You're always going to look the most beautiful, the most radiant when you are using products and you're finding what works for you. There is a million products on the market, there's a million types of trends and clothes and everything. But what is unique to you, what looks the best to you? And that's going to take some time, Okay, Like we like the things that are the best in life, that you really do take time, and that also comes with
you know, your health, fitness, but also your beauty. Okay, It's taken me a long time to look as amazing that I do when it comes to my appearance, because I've taken the time to figure out what looks good from my eyebrows, shape, what looks good on my eyes, what looks good on my skin, how to do my hair. It's taken me a while to do that, the types of tops that look the best on
me, the types of bottoms, like how I present myself everything. So it's like you're going to have to commit really to seeing what is unique to me, what looks the best on me? How do I nurture myself the
best that I can? And that obviously means shying things out. If you feel very uncomfortable in certain clothing, if you don't love the makeup look and you don't like you can go out in broad daylight and just like your face can be just like shining and everyone's gonna see it and you're just gonna feel so readiant, then that makeup looks probably not for you. That those clothes are probably just not for you right now. That's totally fine. You can
literally find anything that's going to make you look amazing. But again, it just comes down to trying things. Someone also asked me wellness tips and routines for like spring and summer. I'm definitely gonna make a whole podcast episode on that and most likely some videos on my main channel because I'm definitely in my wellness Girl era and I feel like we all naturally are. Someone asked me
how did I heal my relationship with food. I have a whole video on that, so I will have that in the show notes, but essentially, I'll just give you a quick rundown. I needed to get to the root of my food issues and why it was that I was so addicted to eating sweets, processed foods. All of these soothing things, which really I had to address the part of me that didn't know how to cope with certain emotions in life. And on the other hand, there was two parts that played
a role. It was my inner child that was going to certain behaviors, like most of us, we go to food to emotionally eat suppress things like
that. But then on the flip side, I had another part of me that was like the strict, tyrant part of me that was heavily influenced by tumbler social media in general, and had this very skewed perception of what it is that I needed to look like and be like which was perfect, which didn't exist, And that part of me picked up really strict behaviors like eating, like dieting, working out, doing all these very restrictive things, which
ended up just pushing my inner child to want to go run to the food to begin with. So it became this cycle, and until I really healed my emotional self, my inner child realized why I was ever going to that in the first place. But on the flip side, also addressing why I picked up first of all, where I picked up these ideas of who I needed to be and how I needed to look and a lot of the how to do with the fact that I lived in an environment where I wasn't the
most picked in school. I had low confidence from so many different things in my life, and that made me have a bigger pull to want to change and diet and strict. And I hated myself. I just didn't love myself. So those two components I really needed to detach from, like what I thought I needed to be and look like like I've been talking about in this video, even when it comes to like the body image and bikini stuff. But on top of that, you know, there was still that part of
me that was not eating the best, not taking care of myself. Well why Well it was because I had a part of me that just wanted to soothe herself, wanted to run away, wanted to isolate, wanted to eat candy, wanted to not take care of herself because she was hurting. I had a lot of trauma. I had a lot of things I needed to
process. So when I realized I was getting in this binge cycle, really unhealthy relationship with food, the first thing that I did was step away from dieting at all, stepping away from this like this idea of like having to have all these goals and having to be this tumbler girl. I had to do that, and you might have to do that. Well, you will have to do that, which is hard because some people don't want to let it go. Like I didn't want to let it go. I didn't want
to let go of my idea of who I wanted to be. I wanted to be fit. I wanted to be hot. I wanted to be accepted. I wanted to be healthy. I wanted to be all of these things. But I wasn't able to get there. I was doing it wrong. So I had to detach. And once I detached, I was able to heal. I took a few years healing. I didn't strict diet, I didn't count calories. I ate kind of healthy, but I let myself eat what I wanted. I would say intuitively eat, but now I intuitively eat.
How people think intuitively eating is not what they really think it is, especially when you're coming from an unhealthy relationship with food, because you try to intuitively eat, but you're still not there yet because you're not addressing the mental health component, and then so you end up just overeating and then eating your emotions and then suppressing and you're not getting to the root. So it's helpful in a way to get away from dieting, but then people get stuck.
Sorry, guys, my camera died, so I don't really remember what I was saying, but yeah, essentially I took some time to heal. And people want a quick fix, a quick answer. They want to have the body and look amazing and eat perfectly, but then they don't want to actually take a moment to step back from being so restrictive and doing all these crazy things. And I just think that you need to come to a point where
you're honestly living, really balanced. And I think one thing that I really got rid of about myself when it came to health, fitness, anything really and I'm still working on that because it seeps into every part of your life is perfectionism. Because I find that a lot of women who struggle with dieting
and cycling, they're trying to strive for perfection. They're doing it because they have a lot of self hate, and they have a lot of emotional issues, and the idea of who they think they need to be and how they need to achieve that thing is very skewed, and I'm saying that from experience, it doesn't need to be that hard. After taking so much time off and healing and fix my relationship with food and not being so strict and not
caring, essentially, my body's looked amazing. I look amazing, and only now really I'm just getting back into my fitness era again. I've always kind of worked out and moved my body and stuff, but nothing extreme. Now I am, and I'm doing it in a different way, like I'm doing it from a place of self love. I'm doing it from a place of let's challenge myself, let's have fun, let's be balanced, let's not be over the top. So it'd be fine that you continue to keep going over
the top. Then there's probably things that you need to heal, which definitely go watch that video, and also you can let me know if you want me to make an updated podcast episode on that, because I can totally do that, all right. I got a few questions here about how to save money this summer. Someone said, I found myself I find myself spending money, especially on the weekends because of FOMO. So I totally get that. I think it will always depend on how much money you really have to be
spending or not right in terms of budgeting. And that's my first thing is you really do need to give yourself a budget. If you have a goal in mind of how much you want to save, or just the fact that, like you only have a certain amount of money to spend, then you need to make sure that you have some sort of budget so you stay on track, like put away I don't know, twenty fifty one hundred dollars a week dedicated to you being able to spend on the stuff that would trigger you
into like fomo type thing. Some people might be like, oh, no, you should just not have that at all and you should just like be super strict if you really struggle with spending, though, you definitely need to address like the emotional component to that, because there usually is an emotional component. A lot of us struggle also with finances, and that's a whole other
topic for another day. I could totally go into that how I fixed up my finances, and I have a video on YouTube, But you really, you really got to see yourself for who you are and why it is that you're spending all the time. Now I know you said fomo, but at the end of the day, it's like, okay, well where's the boundaries? Then? Also, you know what, I'm going to pull this up from Instagram. I saw it today and I saved it because I figured it
was good tips. So this lady her instagram is how I fund this. Now. I probably wouldn't say these things exactly the same way, but I thought that these tips were good, so she said. Or the infographic that she posted is this is what talking to your friends about money sounds like. And so this is obviously for when friends want to continue to go out and
do things. Everything everyone's doing everything on the weekend. One of the things you can say is the next two months are going to be expensive for me. Can we please do it when we have things calm down a little bit. Another one, I'm currently trying to save for a holiday, but I'd love to see you cake and coffee at mine instead. Or money is a bit tight until payday, so I'll have to sit this one out, but
I'll see you next time. Like it's really that simple, right, But we were afraid to say no. We're afraid to also miss out on things. So this is what I say. For one when it comes to being afraid to like say no, you need to because it's either going to be them or you, and you're going to be the one that has to deal with the consequences of you not having money and your financial situation being shambles.
What's going to help you with that, though, is reminding yourself, this is not the last time you're ever going to be able to go out like there is And I always think about this when it comes to the city especially, there is something always going on every day of the week, any time of the day, all season long. There will always be something going on. So you don't need to rush and you don't need to act on that thing right now because it's gonna be there tomorrow and you don't need to go
to every single thing anyways. That's just not that's not normal. That's not how life works. Don't you want to like take your time and you know, save up some money to go on this thing, or like save up some time and your energy literally your social battery to go out to this event at the end of the month that's going to be great, instead of going to it every single week. You know, like there's like poor parties that happen in the city or club nights or day things festivals all summer long.
You don't need to go to all of them, and trust me, you're going to experience it and have way more fun if you go less honestly. Also a few more tips that I have here when it comes suspending, because I feel like, also in summer, we are very susceptible to buying new outfits and just buying new things. Definitely make sure that you're buying pieces that
you can interchange. So a pair of really good genes that you can wear with like a million tops or like this one, this versatile top that's like a white or a bige or a black, but you could pair it with any sort of gene or any skirt. Like, we don't need to only wear things one time. Especially when you are on a budget or you want to make sure that your finances or finances are in alignment, then you need to really think about these things. Even when it comes to like doing your
nails, you can do your nails at home. If you're trying to save money, do your nails at home. Go on YouTube type in how to do your nails professionally at home and not the ones where you buy the fake things and you have to buy a bunch of things. But like, seriously, just how to do a freaking normal manicure, Like for me for my toes, I honestly never go and get my toes done because I know that
I can do it at home. I have the money to be able to get my nails done, and I honestly suck at doing my nails, so I get it done. But there was a time for sure that I didn't want to spend money on my nail so I just did it at home. Another tip, walk places if possible. Now that I don't have a car, this is definitely something that I'm focusing more on, just to walk places instead of taking an uber or even spending money on I don't know, like
transportation and stuff. I know sometimes you can't, but get used to walking. Have a good audio book going on your phone or a podcast that's free, and romanticize the times where you need to, like, you know, go from one place to another instead of being like, oh no, I just need to take an uber. I need to do this, Dada. Make sure you have good shoes as well. Invest in a pair of good
shoes for the summer so you can do some walking. And these are really just for people who might have the money to spend on random stuff but just you know, something comes up or oh I'm not wearing the right shoes, so I'm just gonna uber like no, and that's me, Like I'm talking to myself on this side at this point. Another thing is eat before you go out, so you're not tempted to buy random things on the way. Like let's say you're going to Trinity Bellwood's Park, which is like a park
in Toronto and like whatever, or you're just exploring the city. Make sure that you've eaten before. This is not to also say that you're gonna be cheap and you're gonna go to the restaurants and you're gonna like order water and order nothing. Like don't do that, like honestly, just don't go to the restaurant. But I just mean, like randomly, if you're somebody who just picks up like, oh I'm hungry, I need to snack whatever,
Like, first of all, eat before you go and do something. Obviously, if you're going to lunch or something, you don't need to do that. Just go for lunch if you have the money. If you have it, in your budget. But just like those small little things will add up over time. If you are somebody who's active, who goes out a lot, who whatever, is hungry. Another thing brings snacks with you, like
bring a water bottle as well with you. I don't know how many times I've spent so much money on freaking water bottles, like five dollars of freaking water bottle, and I'll have one sip because I'm dying of thirst, but then I just throw it out, Like these are things you really have to pre plan and you have to think about. Of course, another big thing, especially for the summertime, is to meal prep and to make sure you have majority of your meals at home. This is all outside of just saving
money too. You can just remind yourself that this is for your health and you really don't need to constantly be buying all the things, like when you go out with your friends, like you don't have to get an appetizer and a maine and three drinks and dessert or whatever. You can just get like one small thing. You don't need to do what everyone else is doing. I also put on my list here connect with people, and I think this is more for like the girlies who are going to a patio or going somewhere.
You never know who you can meet who might want to buy you a drink or buy a little sum sum Okay not you don't listen. This is not to like look out for the guys who would just like buy you everything. Please don't do that. Please don't do that. Have some more self respect. And I mean that in the nicest way. Okay, it's great to be treated, but there comes a point where you don't need to rinse every man for all he has just because you want a free drink like it's
giving desperate, it's giving broke, it's giving. Don't please don't like learn how to spend your own money on things, because honestly, I do think that the energy that you're in is really you're just going to continue to attract that same energy. So if you're in scarcity, if you're in broke mentality, if you're in like yeah, and you're trying to get somebody to constantly like buy things for you, buy things, it's not gonna last. It's
not gonna be a thing. I find that you usually attract people who want to spend more money on you or want to take you out, want to do things. When you do that for yourself, when you have self respect, when you get your ass up and you work and you spend your money on yourself. Okay, just a pro tip. Someone asks how to love yourself on a weight lost journey, You need to accept yourself for where you're at right now. You're allowed to change, but you please just accept yourself
for what you are right now. I feel like so many people on a weight lost journey they just hate what they see in the mirror. And I get it. You don't like it. You're not comfortable. You feel like you're not a part of society, like you know, like the beauty standard or whatever. You feel like you want to look a certain way, dada, whatever it is that you think and you feel. But at the end of the day, it's what's going to make it a lot easier for you
is for you to just accept it. For you to not go to the gym and constantly pick at that one thing that looks so terrible on you and you hate it and you just want to change it. Go to the gym and focus on the things that look amazing about you. And if nothing looks amazing and you really can't praise yourself. Okay, let's not think about it right now. We don't need to think about the negative. We're just making it. We're putting ourselves through. Honestly, we're suffering when we do things
like that. Okay, So just please accept yourself through the journey. Remind yourself that you are here and you are committed, and you're doing the work, and that is what you should be praising yourself for instead of begging on
yourself for where you've gotten. But actually, we'll have a video already posted by the time you listen to this episode, and it's like exiting my lazy era, and I talk a lot about detaching from outcomes and identifying as somebody who goes to the gym and really being able to just be consistent with your goals. So I suggest you watch that video because that will definitely help you if you're on a weight lost or if you're on like a gaining journey,
or any journey when it comes to transforming yourself. And also one last tip is to please stop putting your life on hold. You can't do that. You can't do it. I know it's hard. I know you want to feel comfortable. And you want to look amazing in you what or whatever. But if you again, like let go of who you think that you need to be at this moment in time, and please, just like you have to live your life. You gotta go to the beach still, you got
to go outside and get sun. You need to connect with people, You need to love on yourself through this process. You have to do it. If you do not do it, it's going to be very very hard and most likely not sustainable, and you're gonna fall back. I'm telling you, I've been through it. I haven't been somebody who's been very overweight, but I've been through the journey of wanting to change myself and it never worked out.
It never worked out, And I know it can be hard, listen, I know, but again, letting go of the idea of like who you have to be like. I know that society tells us we have to look like this, and it's just so much easier to be hot and like be skinny whatever. But honestly, once you get there, you realize, like, that's not what life is even I don't want to say that's not what life is about. It's definitely a part of life is looking amazing and
feeling great. But oh my gosh, like we just put so much focus on how we should look and that's just not what we're here to do. Somebody said, recommend summer hobbies to pick up, and I just wrote here you can make anything a hobby by just making it a part of your routine.
So you know, maybe once a week you're going to walk around shops and you're looking at I don't know, like art pieces, or you're learning how to paint, but you're doing it once a week and you're going on Pinterest or YouTube and you're typing out how to make a art piece or how to paint a butterfly or anything. Or you know, you want to get into plants, so you start you buy a book on plants, or you go on YouTube and you start to like have this, you know, you
start to teach yourself how to be a plant mom. I think my biggest tip for that though, is to try new things, like you have to, because if you don't really know what to have a hobby, but you told yourself like, oh I need to have it, then try new things. Get out there and try and paint, try and get flowers and see if you can keep them alive. Try dancing to your favorite music in your apartment and see how much you love it. Like that can be a hobby
in it itself. Every Friday night, you're having a glass of wine or a mocktail and you're just dancing and you're vibing and you're enjoying life. Or you're going down to the water and you're having this like you're just romanticizing your life. You're having a good time. Someone asked, what are some better for your skin makeup options for summer. I don't wear a lot of makeup, but I've used Ilia foundation for this will be the second year, or
like the second bottle. I use one bottle on one year because I don't use it that often. But I really like it and it is It's called True skin Cerum Foundation with nice cinnamine and alatone alo infuse. I don't know that last word, but yeah, it's really good. I like it and it's very very light on your skin. I don't I'm not even wearing it right now on my skin in the video, but I really like that. When it comes to I like more skincare products because I want my skin to
be glowing. And hydrating. I don't really care too much about the foundation and stuff, but um SVR Biotic, which is like a cream moisturizer. Game changer. I talk about it all the time on my Instagram. Please go and freaking get that. It is pretty pricey, but it's amazing. Or you could just use any of like you're any moisturizer that you have, add a little bit of Jjoba oil in that and make your skin glowing.
I love it. But I've really been loving blush and I've been using the pixie sticks from Shoppers and I have like a peach color and also like a like a pink blush color and I just like tap it on my cheeks. It's so cute for the summer. I love it. And mascara and I just like brush my eyebrows up like the minimal. The minimal makeup is the best for me. Okay, last question that I'm going to address. Somebody said how to have a sense of safety living in a dangerous city slash like
having being lied to by people that you love. And I thought this is interesting because I'm sure, I mean, even if you don't live in a city in general, being a woman probably in your twenties, even thirty, whatever age you are, you know you might feel a little vulnerable. One thing my somatic therapist taught me is, for one, if you do perceive
everything to be a threat, they kind of will be. This is not to say that if you stop looking at a random man, like a freaking homeless person that looks like they're literally going to come up to you and freaking hit you is not a threat, that they're just going to not be a threat. So obviously I want to say that very lightly, but I just
want to kind of give you that perspective shift in a way. Let's try not to look at absolutely everything and everyone as a threat, because I do think that does something between your energy and then that sometimes is what makes you susceptible to more dangerous things because you feel insecure, feel like you have no
walls, no boundaries, no protection. And another thing that she told me as well is honestly, having a physical item with you, even though you would never use it like something that's obviously like legal and wherever you live, can be very helpful for your energy because again, if you feel like you've got something on you and you are safe, you're going to exude this energy of like, do not f with me, and you're also going to make yourself feel calm at safe, like you know, I have myself and I
can protect myself and whatever. Obviously, it depends on what situations that you're in, like you might need to do more or less than that. But I thought those were two really good tips that she's given me. Also a few other ones that I thought about. Make sure you're always talking to someone on the phone if you're walking home late at night and you feel uncomfortable and
there's not a lot of people around. Again, this is really just going to depend I don't even know if I've really walked the streets of Toronto at night by myself yet. Actually I did. I walked home from a lu Jay's game, but there are so many people on the street. So I was just listening to my music and I was very aware of my surroundings and there was never really an area. There's like police everywhere as well. But if I was, you know, walking down a street, I'd make sure
that I'm actually physically talking on the phone with somebody. Another thing is always let people know where you're going, your friends, your family, whoever, wherever. If you are doing something alone, like majority of the time, just let people know what you're doing, where you're going things like that. Another thing, if you are posting on social media and you are alone, I would suggest post when you leave. I don't always do that when I'm
with people and I'm safe and I know that I'm safe. But you know, there's some times where I just like I'll save Honestly, sometimes I'll just save it because I don't feel like posting in that moment, but just like posts I don't know, like later in the day. But yeah, I think it does come back to the fact that, like you know that perspective shift, make sure you have something on you and really like stand in that confidence, being like nobody's going to take anything away from me, Like you
cannot take things away from me like I have myself. You have to give yourself that energy and you have to protect yourself because you know when you are alone, no one's gonna do it for you but you. So it's like who's it gonna be. Is it gonna be this threat or is it gonna be me? Me? I'm choosing me every time. I'm betting on myself every time, honey, Like, no that's not happening. So anyways, that's gonna be it for this episode. There was a few more questions.
Let me see if there is anything else somebody said to talk about my gym era and that video will talk about it more the exiting my Lazy Girl era. Right now, I am in the phase of building muscle. Definitely want a nice round booty, but it's not like the whole focus. Like, trust me when I say that, it is not the way that I used to look at wanting results in the gym. Like it is what it is
like, it's not that big of a deal. I also obviously want to build muscle as being a woman and it's so good for your hormones and it's just so healthy for us to have a muscle and functionality in general. And I sit a lot as well, so that's really important. I do have a lot of playlists if you want to listen to some music. I have house music, rap music, what else. Yeah, I don't know a lot of different genres of music on my Spotify, So go to my Instagram.
I have a story highlight and it says music and you can tap through and I link all the playlists. But yeah, I think in the next few episodes if we can totally talk more about spring summer vibes, let me know in the comments or DM me let me know what you want to hear. I was thinking, like I said, of doing like how to build
like a spring slash summer wellness routine. Also how to be productive will enjoying summer because I know that, you know, when summer comes, sometimes we fall off and we you know, we fall off a little bit too much, So like how to have that balance? So let me know. And yeah, I hope you guys enjoyed this episode and I'll talk to you guys in the next one. Bye.