Appoche production.
Episode seven, Dan in the Slammer. It's all over for Dan Saunders. He's been caught. Well, he dubbed himself in.
We've believer a practice that you understand these rights.
Yeah, and he's had his day in court to find out how Dan got here and how the glitch changed his life. Head back to the previous six episodes when we left d Anne. In the last episode, he was found guilty and could have been sentenced to a whole lot longer than he.
Actually got on charge to obtained financial advantage by deception. You are convicted and seems to be imprisoned for twelve months commencing this day.
He's got to pay back around two hundred and fifty grand to the NAB, which is a lot less than the one point six million dollars. But that wasn't all.
Twelve months inside and then eighteen months community corrections order afterwards.
And so are you let out of the courtroom straight away?
Yeah, So you basically go downstairs into holding cells and then sort of people who have been convicted or they have come from jail and they're a waiting to go upstairs and that kind of thing, like they basically get you know, sort of turfed in with them. But I remember I was probably underneath the County Court for about two hours, sitting in the suit in a cell with a couple of other dudes. And yeah, then the buses turn up and take us off to jail. And the
first place we went was the Melbourne Assessment Prison. And yeah, spent like about three or four days there, those few days of them at the map. So I was like there was grown men like crying on the phone of their wives and stuff, and like I remember I woke up the first morning and there was I got put in a cell. Like when I first went into a cell, I went in by myself, and there was like this sachet of bleach and that the place dunk. There was a sashet of bleach, and I was like, oh, it's weird,
you know, like just bleach. So I emptied out the trash can and used a shower to like put some water in it and sort of just just sort of cleaned up the place a little bit with the bleach. And I learned later on that the bleach was to clean like syringes and stuff. Yeah, I didn't actually know that. I wasn't use it for clean so like a couple of couple of nights later, another guy came into the cell. He's like, where's the bleach?
Like, do you ask questions about what people are in for?
Not really, like you just sort of let people divulge to you, Like, I'm no violent person, so you don't really go up to people and just start going off, you know, because it's a good way to get smack in the head. But you just sort of like I remember the first morning I went down and that like, you know, as soon as you go down, there's like this breakfast sort of table with dry cereals and stuff, and I could smell bacon and I was like, surely
they ain't give it bacon. That's pretty you know. And so the bacon you could smell was coming from the guard's office. So they're sort of like, you see there's this like psychological sort of games, you know, like straight off this, yeah, it looks like a bike or something is like heavy step blow comes down and he's like, where's all the where's.
All the bacon?
Someone stole the bacon, you know, And because you couldn't say, you know, like there was no bacon on the table, you could smell it. And he grabbed this little guy. He just held him against the wall. He's like, did you have any fucking bacon? He's like, no, no, I didn't not swear. I sweat like so I was just like, okay, that's what we're in. We're in a fucking We're in a madhouse. That's what it is. So you just got to sort of have your wits about it because you know,
there's always stuff going to go on like that. So yeah, I mean so a few days later, I moved to move to Port Philip.
So you walk into Port Philip. That's a max security jail.
Yeah, just so like real, real dirty. They call it Port Putrich.
That just reaped read and reeks.
Of I just you know, like there's something called called brownie up and what they do is they they ship like an inmate will ship on their hand and then wipe it all over the cell. You know, like so it just yeah, like it just makes for an absolute yeah, like it just reads disaster. Yeah, you know, thankfully it wasn't like that in order to the souts like it wasn't like that. But yeah, I mean I just I don't know. I just talked to people. I don't know
how it happened. I like bought I bought a lot of I bought a lot of cigarettes, like a lot of a lot of pouches of tobacco and stuff, and I thought, I just need to get it's much stuff as I can get. And then sort of because like sort of currency I heard that. I don't know, I didn't know anything. Like there was people in court that go to court because they know they're going to jail, so they go to court in their comfy clothes with a pillow. So that's what they take downstairs with him,
you know what I mean. So they're like all ready to go on the bus, you know, and they got pillow and it's insane, you know, like he's me in the suit going.
Anyway.
But yeah, like if you go a few times, you start to you know, you know what it's like. Yeah, so anyway, like yeah, they just sort of when you get into they just strip your bear and and then yeah, just take all your possessions, take everything off you on and then yeah, they put you Like I's just like what you see in the show is basically but it's it's pretty like it's pretty hectic place. Max Security is pretty pretty hectic.
As I've said before, I haven't been to jail and have really no plans to go. I do know a few people that have been inside. Outside of Dan, the people I know have spent lots of time in jail. One of those blokes is a guy called Brent.
I'm known as simmer All up fourteen years jail since the age of twelve.
He has a successful podcast called The Clink, which is about stories of people who did some bad stuff and how they've redeemed himself. Brent's not a bad guy, but you also don't fuck with him. His background is he was a sergeant at arms for a biker gang and went to importation of drugs. So I wanted to ask a pro what it's like when you see someone like Dan walk in to a maximum security prison.
And you be in a maximum security jow.
First of all, don't eeball anyone. No one wants to hear your fucking story. Don't ask anything of anyone, Be quiet, keep your eyes wide open, sit with your back.
In the corner of the room.
And just listen.
Bottom line, your personality is what's going to identify you and work out who you are. Everybody watches body language, Everybody listens. Soon enough, they're going to work out whether you're an AB or just a D for dick. And if that's what you are, that's how you be treated. You want to play the alpha, be prepared for the games. The games could cost you your life. Want to be b Just keep your mouth shut to your own time.
We've seen the movies dropping the so bashings.
Is that what it's really like.
I'll never tell anybody. The worst thing I've seen in jail.
Oh, the worst I saw in terms of like violence was probably guy ate. So he went to the visit center and he ate balloons full of ice, which they which they hide girlfriends and partners and her friends hide it and so they swallow it. And yeah, one of the balloons burst in his stomach. So basically like he was absolutely screaming his head off for about four hours and then he eventually like just went silent and he passed away.
And then yeah, and he was in the cells.
He was like in a cell that was about four cells for five cells away. So that was Yeah, that was pretty crazy. But also the violence was probably two guys held another guy down while a third guy put a dunny brush up his ass, and like held out the dunny brush and it was just blood and crap all over it, and then said that's what happens if you fuck with us. And I was like, well, remimmy, never do business with those guys.
So how do you find a crew in maximum security? Chael, Well, I don't know.
Like I people automatically thought that I was like a wife basher, or I was like drink driving or something, or I was a cop. That's how they felt about me. Yeah, but so when I told people that a.
Couple of those will get you bashed.
Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yeah. So but yeah, I was pretty lucky early on that I gave I think I gave a cigarette to the right guy and people saw us talking and he was quite sort of influential, so people sort of left me alone once I told people that I took money off a bank, and then what happens is see, if you lie, it's even worse, so they
go and check. So lucky there was someone to put that interview on YouTube, so it was quite accessible that, you know, people could validate the story and it'd be like, so people come up and ask you, well, you know, why are you here? You look like clean skin? What did you do. I'd be like I took some money off a bank and they'd be like, oh, yeah, did you, And a couple of days later I'd be like, hey, bro, yeah I rang my missus. You are Yeah, you took some money off the bank. Yeah, good on you, good
on you. You know this sort of thing. So after that it was all like it was all right, Like I stand at the end of the line for the like it's cold pizza, Like I'll give a shit about cold pizza, you know what I mean. Like there's not only serving rockpool there, you know what I mean? There
was seven you know shit pizza. I used to go to Australia's best restaurant that's called Scoppery in North Carlton, right, the best, the best restaurant ever you see this way to named Georgia, not case but the most beautiful man go and give him a tip. Is the best guy if you hadn't told me, Like their signature dishes Agnalotti belt Plin, right, which is like a beautiful rakedy that's filled with like veal, pork and rabbit, beautiful beautiful dish,
beautiful like they went seven that who cares? Like do you want to go first? Go first, no problem, might not care. So I wasn't trying to ruffle anyone's feathers. I wasn't like, you know, trying to be the first. You know, in the morning, they put like bread and jam out for breakfast, people just going, you know, steal it because it's jail, Like no one leaves any for anyone else. Like the people closest to it go and steal it and then they you know, barter for it.
But I think I was interested in like some jail cook brand and some you know, shit fucking doughnut jam. Don't you care about that whatever?
Mum come to visit. Yes, you did. Yeah, how's that? It was good?
Yeah, it's good. She goes, Oh, you know, I can nail you down for a two hour conversation every now and then. You know, it's like, at least I know where you are. Probably the only thing I regret is her having to come visit me in Max security jail, because it's like, you know, sometimes you've got to like get searched when you walk in, and it's very Yeah,
it's a very intimidating place. Like I'm not I'm not a fighter, but you have to like you have to defend yourself because you will get steamrolled if you don't.
Did you have to you have to do that?
Yeah, you have to. Like if you're challenged and people see you go down like a sack ship, then you're like automatically someone's you know, someone's bitch, So you've got to fight back. Most people who were there for a long time, I'd sit and talk to them because, like, I found their story interesting. So I'd actually just be talking to the people who were in there for twenty years. So once you start doing that, people don't really come up and pick on your Like it's not it's just
like a shit school camp, you know. Yeah, it's all ease.
So it was a year on the top. As far as the sentence goes, yeah, yeah, can you get out early?
No?
No, it was just like a straight sentence. So when I went to the country jail, it was a bit it was a bit better, but not, you know, not much. It was still like violence, and you had more things, so you had like knives like on a chain and stuff.
But in a way that was.
Almost sort of worse because it was like, you know, you could just rip the knife off the chain or you know, I saw once two guys got a guy and took him to the knife and then a third guy knifeed him of. One of the funniest things I ever saw in jail was I could buy from the cans, and you could buy these cans of soup, you know, like high ind soup and whatever, and to heat it up. This guy thought he'd put it. So we lived in
these like little units like with kitchens and stuff. So there was four cells in the unit, but then there was like communal kitchen type thing, and he put the can on the electric element to heat up right, and forgot about it.
And it made this It was like.
A bomb, Like it just went like it was like this old mighty crack and the whole unit, like the whole kitchen was just covered in tomato.
So yeah, like a blood bath, but just yeah, but just.
Stuff like that all the time. Like a couple of the Islander boys decided to be like wo to hijack the milk cart and steal all the milk for the jail and then just sat around in the middle of like an oval and that got this topping stuff and we're just making milkshakes and like shaking the little five hundred pure boxes of milk and singing my milkshake brings all the boys to the uh you know what I mean, Like like far parts of it were hilarious. I remember I saw this guy and he's like, ask me what
I'm in for. And I'm like, man, I don't care. It's all good, you know, like whatever you did, like it's not you didn't do anything. It gets me. He's no worries, He's like, no, no, ask me.
Ask me.
I'm like, okay, what did you do? And he's like, murder on the dance floor, bro, murder on the dance floor. I'm just like, that's good. One. He goes, yeah, okay, that's what I say. He goes, that's what I say. That's great, that's great, and you go, but how you didn't you didn't kill the groove? They did you And he's like, ah, dad didn't kill the groove. But just stuff like that, you know, like look, no doubt. People are in jail for a reason, and I was in
jail for a reason. Like you got to remember, these people didn't get red bedtime stories when they were kids. One guy told me he was like he didn't he couldn't hear in one ear because his dad used to kick him in the right ear every day when he was a kid. Tell me, you go through that shit and then you're not like a little bit disgruntled with the system and want to lash out. I can understand if you do the wrong thing and go to jail, I get it. But there's reasons behind why people do
what they do. No one's born bad. It conditioned to being bad. One guy he got told by his dad every day until he was like seventeen to chop his dick off. I'm like, why the fuck would your dad tell you that. It's like, I don't know he was crazy. I don't know something wrong series, So yeah, just an open my eye. I saw a lot of stuff and I was like, wow, okay, like this is there's a lot. Again, it doesn't justify it, but it's like you can see
how you know that should have been picked up. You know it should be picked up at the end of the day. You should have you know, you need a license drive a car. You should be checked on when you're a parent, Like there should be people going, is that kid okay? Because by the time they're eleven, they're already gone.
Lots of dance mates never saw him in jail. You remember Evano from an earlier episode. I wanted to see that after all the parties in the free hotel rooms, the girls, the booze, and some other more incriminating things. If Havano ever went to see Dan while he was in jail for twelve months.
No, I didn't, and I regret it, actually because I definitely did have generinely did have his back. But I don't know, I was just a little bit. It felt awkward to be walking into a prison, and I shouldn't have. If I had my time again, I would have visited him for sure. And so what's your relationship like Dan? Now, Yeah, it's good, it's really good. Yeah, we chat on the phone from time to time, particularly as I've matured. We're similar people. I'd say we're pretty down to worth and
we both love a good time. But we're not overly motivated by money. And yeah, that's why I like it. That's why I think I'll get along with him. So while it's not a yeah, he's not overly ambitious in terms of career wise, and.
I like that. Dan really didn't do this for the money, definitely not.
He did it for experiences and to take people along on the ride with him.
So what did you learn from the glitch?
I learned that people act differently when you've got money, They treat you differently. Yeah, I just saw a lot of gold diggers on his phone. He was getting messages from countless different people wanting cash, wanting for the party to continue. But I mean they weren't his friends. It was just people cling on to the money.
Did money change Dan? No? I don't. I don't think it did.
No, he was he was always the same person. Definitely didn't when I first met him before the glitch. He was that type person who just wants to shout everyone, and the money just allowed him to do on a greater scale.
And what do you reckon Dan learned from the glitch?
He definitely learned who his true friends were, just based on all the people who sort of pretty much abandoned him, who he probably considered to be good mates. But I think he just got an overall perspective on how he wants to live his life. He's he's seen what it's like to be to be able to spend money on anything, and overall his experience is that he doesn't want that anymore.
Twelve months in jail can change a bloke. Dan spent twelve months across a bunch of different institutions. He didn't become a career criminal like some do. He just kept to himself, didn't make any friends, but more so didn't make any enemies either. Remember, Dan still has eighteen months of community service to do when he gets out, and he also has some cash to pay back. Do you owe the National Australia Bank any money? Well apparently, but yeah, I don't know how much do you owe?
Will they fight the county court find me two hundred and fifty thousand dollars? Well, I pay the court, I think, and then they that's part of restitutions, so they give that back to the net.
So you pay an installment. So I'm guessing or something, not sure.
I don't know. I don't know how that works, but I guess, yeah, I guess installments. And yeah, if I ever own a property that's that's obviously worth you know, somewhere near that amount, they will take the property to pay that. I guess.
Sure. And so you have a criminal record. Now, yep, you get out of jail. Who's there to pick you up?
Yeah, mum was there. My step brother, one of my half brothers was there. So yeah, they just they just took me home and and yeah, gave me a home cooked meal, and yeah, it was just nice. It was nice to see them again. I mean in some ways like I had, you know, I had a few I had a few good friends in jail. Like I you know, it was like.
To leave jail.
It wasn't like it was mixed emotions. It was like, well, you know when they sort of strip you and take your phone and you know what I mean, clothes. I just mean, like when they take everything off you and no one could call you, it's kind of free. It's a really I can't explain it. It's sort of really nice feeling. It's like you're just alone with yourself and you and your thoughts and you can gather everything again.
It's it's pretty Yeah, it's pretty wonderful feeling. Like I'd recommend it not jail, but I'd recommend just going and switching everything off for a while and you know, just having some time with yourself because it's good. I think we stopped at the supermarket on the way home and and I just looked at the morning fresh There was a big display of Morning Fresh, and I hadn't seen Morning Fresh for like years. I was like, it's amazing.
I'm just gonna sit back and have a look at this, because like everything in jail never seemed quite clean, you know, Like I thought to myself all the time. I was like, you know, I just had some Morning Fresh. I really just clean this plate nicely, and like clean this cutlery, and everything just be better with the bit Morning Fresh.
There was also the bit about the money Dan stole from the safe of the restaurant that he was working at. Remember the ones that didn't pay their staff. So Dan stole the money, paid the staff and took them all to dinner.
So actually in jail, in jail, I did the court case for the restaurant, of course, so I did that via video link, and the magistrate said, so it was pretty much an open and shutcase, pretty much like the first one. But the magistrate did say in his closing remarks he said, now I understand you're in jail for other reasons. I looked at his face. He was the
magistrate I'd talked to at the restaurant. Yes, so he said in his closing remarks he said, look, I'm sure this is not you know, this doesn't seem like it's in your character that you'd normally do something like this. However, you have done the wrong thing and I must give you a sentence for it. However, I believe there are reasons you did this, which we're not going to go into here. That's what he said. I was like, you know what, that's actually enough for me. I'm happy with that.
And then he gave me six months concurrent, so time served. He knew I was in jail for a year, so he gave me six months in jail to run concurrently with the sentence. I already had, so no more time. So I was like, you know what, thanks for that. Because we had the conversation and he was like, you know what's going I remember he asked me. He said, Hey, what's going on with the cash thing? Like we can't We like to come over here, but we can't pay cash.
We've got to pay with that, you know, the company can't, so to speak.
So Dan gets out of jail, but he's still going to serve eighteen months of community service.
Community service was stacking chair all that sort of thing, like if I had it, if I had had to stack chairs for five years. That would have been worse than going to jail for one year. That was shit stacking chairs where well, like just community centers. It wasn't always stacking chairs. But I say that because other menial tasks are that. So you know, like it might have been you know, going to the food bank and helping out the food bank and you know, look, I can't
I met a lot of great people doing that. I met a woman that I was in a relationship for a while with doing that. So that was actually that was really good and it was good to do something in the community. I liked it. But yeah, I mean it wasn't It wasn't like yeah, I mean you were there for you know, six hours, you know, every week or whatever.
Dan is released from prison in May of twoy sixteen.
So it's been a while since you've been out of jail. Since since jail, you've done a bunch of stuff.
Haven't been back yet.
Haven't been back.
That's good, which is you know, I think about forty percent people go back.
Dan. How is how are you now? I don't know?
You tell you tell me.
I mean, you look bloody normal, You look like just a normal bloke, how do you feel about what happened?
Well, I definitely had a hangover period afterwards, Like when I was working at that restaurant and stuff like, it was definitely like the staff from there. I can tell you some wild times, like we had some crazy nights because I was sort of like trying to recreate you know, the stuff that was happening at the bank with no cash, with no cash, with minimal, minimal cash. Now, I mean it's just I mean, it's almost like it didn't happen now, I mean it's you know, my life's completely different. I've
certainly got it. Had a window into a world that you know, I had a curiosity about, but no longer do. I'm no longer under the illusion that people with more money or any better people. They're just they're just different. Got a wealthy mate. I always have a joke with him about like he's got an outfit for everything. You don't
play tenancy like busy tennis kid. It's like, mate, just wear some like board shorts and don't worry about you know, like he's always got you know, so so wealthy people always have an outfit, like their teeth are usually like impeccable. But he's got he's got a yacht and that's a bit of fun to go. So you know he's got you know, he has a crack back at me and goes, yeah, he didn't, he didn't, He didn't even save any money made. But you know, but.
How did you meet this wealthy mate just at a bar? Just a bar or not not not during the time of fun or during the time of fun.
Absolutely, I mean so many people during that time. It's it's the gift that keeps him giving a lot of the time because it's like you've got still got these great connections with this. You know, you walk into a party and there's someone who you've gone through some crazy experience with and all you need to do is go there you going, you know, bit of a raised eyebrow, and everyone knows what you taught. You know, you both
know what you're talking about. And even though he was you know, he was very wealthy then and he still is very wealthy. You like, he doesn't care about that, Like it's about the connection that we re formed. It wasn't the fact that you know, like, yeah, I was sure I was getting the money from somewhere else, but or stealing the money, you know, as a you know now is it's transpired. But he doesn't see that as.
Being an issue.
He's just like, well, you know, there's more than one may to skin a cat, you know, to show up with that, you know, like some cold drinks and go out on the yacht for the day. That's better than owner, you know, the only you got so much shit to worry about assurance, it's better just to have a mate. And you just show up and you're just like, yeah, great, still have an account with the air No, no, now accounts with the NAB.
Still still able to get a bank account?
Yeah, bank accounts, okay, can do at this stage, I'm not sure after this podcast, I'm not sure. Yeah, I'm basically going to keep talking about it until the NAB hires a hit man and kills me.
What about girlfriend, Now, have you got a girlfriend or anything?
No? No, well I said, I haven't got a girlfriend. I've got I've got a fiance and she's a love my life. It's probably due to her. While I look, you.
Know so fresh, don't drink anymore?
No, not really, like look, I'm not I'm not totally putting into bed like if you've got, tell me what you've got.
If you've got a nights bottle beer in the fridge.
Look, you know it's it's it's that kind of thing, like it's I've done it to death. I really gave it a crack, and you know, now I'm forty years old. What am I going to do anyway? It look like even if you go to the bar and you try and smash it up, you still look a bit funny. When you're forty, Say you want kids and you have them, do you tell the kids about what you did? I think they'll probably know because I don't think you can. Yeah, I don't think you can hide a movie for me kids.
I've been to jail, so I've seen what people what a job people can do with their kids. So I don't think i'll do I don't think i'll do a bad job.
You just mentioned a movie. Is there a chance of a movie?
Here's a chance. Yeah, But it's like you know, like I mean, if you say you know you're going to do a movie, then you know invariably you won't. So I don't know. I've got no idea. There is a high level of interest. I'll put it that way. But you know, I'm not in charge of movies. I can't make one, so I guess it's up to other people.
Dan's done a fair bit of media. You might have heard his podcast with Adam Shanned or The Story on a few other podcasts, but in this one he really has told us everything. As we're writing this final episode, we got the text that we've been waiting for from Dan. He signed a deal for his story to be turned into a movie with a US studio. Things are going to start to heat up for Dan with a movie deal, and I wanted to know who Dan Reckons could play him if it's ever made.
If I had to choose, I don't know.
The biggest you can get DiCaprio, Yeah, I don't know. I think I think DiCaprio or maybe some of the Yeah, I don't know. Maybe some of the women he dates would be a better age, so maybe someone younger. Yeah, I'm not too sure, though. I don't know anyone who had the passion for the story and wanted to play me i'd be happy with.
Since we started releasing episodes of The Glitch, a fair bits happened. There's been a lot of hype around Dan's story. He's done more TV and radio promoting the podcast.
This is an incredible story. We're about to talk to Dan.
He has a new podcast, The Glitch, which is now on the iHeartRadio app Hi.
Dan, Guys, what a wonderful story this is, but not.
So wonderful in the end.
Tell us like you had your ATM card.
The podcast is being listened to right across the worldtend. We originally planned to wrap up the last episode with questions from you about anything you wanted to know about The Glitch and what happened for Dan, and that was supposed to be episode eight. But along this journey in Dan telling his story, we've become mates and he's now told us some of the looser stories that Dan hasn't yet told.
Probably the most cringey story I can tell you.
Okay, cool.
So we will now have an episode eight with your questions, plus an update on the Hollywood movie deal and some of the looser stories that Dan has never told. Some people listening to this will say that you're a legend. You screwed the big guy. Well done.
Some people will say he's a common thief.
I really don't care what people think about me. I mean I'm not trying to sell anything. I'm not at the end of this going to go, hey, have you got about forty five minutes, because I'd love to talk about the Lord Jesus Christ. You know, I'm not interested in I'm not trying to give you anything here. All I'm telling you is a story. I don't owe you anything. I don't want to be your friend. And hey, if you hate me, go for it. But my advice would
be wind something else to do it. Look, it doesn't matter.
That's next time on the glitch. Are you ashamed of this story?
Oh, like a little bit.
And I also don't like I don't want to make of it either. Really, I mean, it's just it's an example of when you give people unlimited funds. She's sort of been out to, you know, the whole party of about you know, sort of fifty people that she was just wanted to get laid And yeah, there was this.
We were in the casino and Crown Casino in Melbourne and made of Mine just had an idea that it was going to start daring people to take the rule a ball out of the wheel.
We just went and did the most outland of stuff, like the stuff that we would never do any other time. All these stories not you know, not particularly proud of that, but it's just, you know, something that something that happened