[00:00] Welcome back to the Focus B show. This is Katie Suddar here aka the focus b. And on this show, I interview high performers and leaders around the world to discover their secrets on peak performance, productivity, mindfulness and leadership. So if you want to take your performance and your leadership to the next level, then you're in the right place. Listen up and connect with the magic.
[00:37] You today we're going to look at what's the number one reason why people fail? What do you think it says? What do you think is the number one reason why people fail? Not daily on small things, but on big things, on bigger projects, on career changes. Why do people fail? Fear. Fear is the number one reason. And it's because we are not designed, quote unquote, design, created, built in a way that evolutionary makes sense for us to be successful on a big scale. What do I mean by this? I mean to be the top 1% athlete or to be the top, whatever, 0.5% most successful singers. And if we're looking at success on a sort of society level status and income and rankings, and we're not actually made in a way or designed again, I don't mean designed, I mean our evolution hasn't made us in a way that we actually want success. We want it maybe from an ego perspective, but our whole body and our whole mind is resistant to it. And this is because if you think back to when we were in the caves, we didn't want to stand out. We didn't want to be different and an exception and the best or the worst. We wanted to mingle and be at the same level because it was dangerous for us to stand out, because it meant necessarily that some people wouldn't follow or agree. And we can think that from the times when we were all living in tribes that wasn't great to actually stand out. And so I often think about this because I feel that, yes, fear is the number one reason the people fail, or at least don't succeed and don't reach their goals, or don't thrive, or don't get as high as they could in their business and their careers. And this is because we're not actually meant to stand out. It takes a toll, it takes a cost, and it's something that subconsciously holds us back. Subconsciously, you might be pushed like crazy to reach your seven 8910 figure business, but then subconsciously all of you are thinking, I'm not sure that works. And the way people get there is by having a peer group that's already there because we don't want to stand out. So if all your friends and all your family in one given situation, for instance, if you want to be the number one runner in the world and none of your friends or family run, of course it's still possible. But it's making it very hard psychologically, because not only you'd be the only runner, but you'd be the only runner at that level, and then you'd be the only and this means that you're standing out. Standing out. Standing out like a sore thumb. And all of your inner psychology wants to bring you back down to reach that level. So people who thrive and end up at seven, 8910, eleven figure businesses, for example, or number one athletes in the world, they have people around them that are at a similar level, therefore they're not more successful than their peers. They're at the same level, so they don't stand out. Now, on a world perspective, they might be number one in the world at running, for instance. But if all of their friends are high, high performing runners, then it doesn't feel to them like they're standing out. This is something that I feel isn't covered enough because so many people are pushing, pushing, pushing to get somewhere in their business, but surrounded by people who think differently, surrounded by people who are on a different level, at least financially. And this will pull you down. And nowadays there are ways that you can have this peer group, which is amazing, without actually knowing the people. If you're 24/7, listening to Tony Robbins, I guarantee your business is going to go up because he has such an amazing mindset that it's contagious. And just by listening to the tapes, just by watching the videos, it will get to you, the courses. Tony Robbins being just one of the numerous examples I could quote on people who have this different mindset, tim Ferriss shows fantastic. There are loads of people out there, but all the people who have that type of mindset, who have that edge, who think differently, who are doing crazy things like ice bath and exercising loads and building high figure businesses and speaking to opera, all these people have a way of thinking. And you can soak it in. And then you feel when you're taking those actions that you have a peer group that gets you. And even if you're not having lunch with them every day, it will still affect the way you think. I know that in my case, just reading certain books, the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People that I mentioned, a lot of amazing books won't go into that now. But reading those books has been a way to shift my mindset. Listening to podcasts and then actually finding people that are in a similar frame of mind or think similarly, people that I have on the podcast, for instance, is an amazing way to just shift your whole inner mindset and then you can be on a similar level of them, whatever that means for you. Again, maybe you're a musician, maybe you're an athlete, maybe you run your own business. It doesn't matter. It's wherever you are. If you want to be the higher level of performance and thriving and quote unquote success, whatever that means for you, need to find people that are that way because we're not meant to stand out. And it makes it very hard for us biologically to force ourselves to be different than the people around us. And I think about this a lot, a lot, a lot, because I've noticed how much anything from a podcast or something I listen to to a half an hour conversation over lunch affects my psyche and affects my own ambitions, my own drive and my own way of seeing life, the world and business. That's one thing. And I said that was the number one reason why people fail. Then there's a fear aspect. And for that it really is just a fear of failure, fear of rejection. Guess what? Fear of rejection. We don't want to stand out. Fear of failure is a way of being rejected. It's literally something that feels like a threat to our own existence. It's not. But that's how it feels to overcome that fear. Like I said, shift your peer group, but also take baby steps. Start doing, build up the momentum. Another really important point that I want to mention here is that people also fail because their drive and their why is about them. If you want to be the number one runner in the world and that's your core drive and that's all you want, and you want to be the number one, this is a very tough goal to win or reach because you're building your whole self esteem, self confidence, self value on that one specific goal. And again, this is not something that biologically is logical for us or is suited because we're social beings and we want what's best for the group. Which is why, again, being in a peer group will help. But also if you're building a business, if your own aim is just, you won't be a millionaire and it sounds super cool or billionaire, great, but that drive will only take you so far. And guess what? If you reach it, maybe you already have and yet you're seven plus or more figure business. You're probably not going to be that happy if that drive is just to reach that certain number because that in and of itself doesn't really do that much. But if your whole drive is to create a positive impact in the world, whether it through sustainability or through leadership or through enabling people to lead the life that they want, whatever that is if your whole drive is to create impact for the people, then not only will you be actually more successful, but also you'll thrive both in the journey and as things progress. So that's another reason people fail, is because their core drive and initial motivation isn't really their deepest why and it's not impact driven enough. And so it doesn't actually give them that power, give them that boost to take things to the next level. So if you're struggling to get to a higher level wherever, let's say in sports, just a change from business. Couple of things. Is your peer group adapted? Do you have a coach, a mentor, someone that's really training? Maybe you're training in a group, in a team. Is that holding you? Do you have that environment where you feel like, wow, to belong in that group, you're going to have to work like crazy even to be in that group. And that will push you higher. That's number one. And number two, what's, like a deeper reason? Like a deeper impact? Okay. Your number one runner, athlete, swimmer, good luck beating all Felbe's records in the world. Great. Fantastic. So what what's the deeper why? What's the deeper impact that it will give you? Because your ego will only push you so far. And afterwards, it comes from a place of deeper connection, deeper spirituality. So what's your deeper level that will push you to the next step? Those would be the two core things to reflect on. Is your peer group aligned with your direction? And what is the greater impact, the greater contribution that's behind all of this drive and ambition? And of course, fear. It's okay. Mastery of fear. One step at a time. And the more you take action, the more momentum you will build. Thank you so much for tuning in today. Please leave a review if you haven't already. It really helps to promote the podcast and get this message out there to reach more people. Thank you so much for tuning in.
[11:21] Thank you so much for tuning in today to the Focus Bee Show. I would absolutely love to hear your feedback. So let me know in an Apple review or YouTube comment what was most valuable for you. And feel free to share this episode with a friend or family member. Wishing you a wonderful, magical and focused day ahead.