Kabbooms.
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the Old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Wow.
The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
In the air everywhere, The Fifth Hour with Ben Mallor and Danny g Radio As we are hanging out here on this Saturday, the seventh day of the great month of October. And Danny, we survived the Friday podcast. Now we've arrived at the weekend. I'm on drugs right now. Man, here we are. How amazing is that?
Yes, sir? And are we going to talk Colorado Buffalo right now?
I think we're good. I think Dion does not get enough attention though you know he doesn't a lot of people don't like to talk about Dion. They don't like to talk about Colorado football and Dion at all. On this podcast, Danny, we have this is a test the Lost Wages Virgin Your Irish eyes are lying and back by popular Man, great feedback, Foody Fun. Will that become a weekly feature? Foody Fun returns, pop culture, pop goes the culture. Let's try to get to all of this.
But we don't get to something, we'll just happen on the on the Sunday with the mailbag. So this week mentioned on the Friday podcast, I filled in doing the midday show in addition of the night show locally in LA and so I was bedraggled. I was bedraggled by my phone though. So Wednesday, as I've mentioned my schedule, I do the radio show and then and I spend a lot of time corresponding with the producers in Boston.
And I have to do this kind of early in the day because I sleep during the middle of the day, and by the time I get done sleeping, it's nighttime in Boston, and so people are not at work, and so I have to accommodate their schedule. And I get it, but it creates kind of a quagmire for my schedule. You know, It's just fine. These are first world problems
to have. There are much worse problems to have. So I spend a lot of my time handicapping on Tuesday, and then I really I lock in on Wednesday because we record the show on Thursday and then it's broadcast on Friday. That's the way the week works. So working with the guys in Boston to create the show every week, and anyway, we have three parts to it, a lot of moving parts whatever. So on Wednesday this week a little different than normal. Around right around eleven thirty, I
was jolted out of out of my slumber. Not a deep sleep, but a mild sleep.
I was.
I don't really sleep deep that often anyway, But right around eleven thirty, which is like middle of the night. I think I'd gone to bed about ten in the morning, so I'd only been in bed for like an hour and a half or less than that. And why did
I hear alarm bells? Buzz boom bang? I got? This is a test nationwide test of the Federal Emergency Alert System started broadcasting just before two twenty pm Eastern, which is eleven I guess it was eleven twenty out here, and it went to all cell phones, televisions, and radios across the United States.
And as the meme goes, he looks at his wife, Biden does and says, oh shit, I think I just texted the whole country.
Yeah, I mean, but for those of yet again spitting a loogi at the nocturnal employee, no respect to the nocturnal employee. Uh, those of us that work all night because we sleep during the day. Now, to be fair, my wife did say, hey, you should probably turn your phone off, and I said, oh, it won't be a problem. It was a problem. It was a problem. I liked it better in the old days. You know, we're old school, Danny. We come from the old country before the current system. Remember the old EBS test.
Oh of course. Yeah, this with this new modern one doesn't matter if your ringer is turned off or down right, it goes off, just like an alarm set on your phone to wake yourself up.
Yeah, the only way to avoid it is just have your phone completely off. But you know that that old one where they'd come on and you like that, this is a test. This station is conducting a test of the emergency broadcast system. This is only a test, and then that would be it. It would be you know, maybe thirty seconds and they'd go back and it was not very long. And this one seemed like it's too long,
what about brevity? We need brevity. But anyway, so, but you were already a work that This went on the radio too, so this was everywhere, So you guys weren't on the air though.
What no, no. I actually was taking a nap in between my school shift and the radio shift, so it woke me up out of a sleep as well.
Oh all right, it was Cowherd show. I guess that. Yeah, Well, there you go. This is a test.
Tested to see how fast you and I could roll our fat asses out of bed.
Well, you know, roll out of bed, and maybe something else happens in that bed. Maybe you're maybe you're a lost wages virgin, or maybe you're no longer a lost wages virgin. I don't know.
Yeah, more specifically, I guess you could say a lost wages whore, because I'm now in your category. When I say you're, I mean you and everybody listening who has gambled legally in Las Vegas. I've never done it. I came close during the playoffs when I went to the Allegiant Stadium tour. It was the day that the Bengals upset the Chiefs. Before that game started, I told my stepson, I said, I just have a feeling, man, Bengals are going to get the upset today. And he's like, you
should put one hundred or two on it. And I looked at my then fiance and I'm like, we don't. This trip was expensive. We don't have an extra hundred or two hundred. And she looked at me and say, that's our food money today. And of course we're watching the game. We're eating our lunch at some little steakhouse and I have a little steak in front of me and We're watching the Bengals beat the Chiefs, and I'm like, damn it, I would have won a ton of money,
you know, Forget that stupid steak I had. I could have had ten steaks, yeah, my winnings. So I've had a bad taste in my mouth ever since that experience. When I go back one of these times, I'm gonna place a bet finally, at one of the sports book's kiosks, I always see losers standing around those machines, and I'm really curious. The guys Covino and Rich they know this. They know I've never had an official gambling slip in
my hand before. We're obviously there for the Canelo fight last weekend as we broadcasted live on Friday and Saturday. They took me to one of the sports books, to the Kiosk, and they're like, all right, we're gonna pool our money. We'll all go in on a bet. That way, it makes it more enjoyable when we're at the fight tonight. We're gonna bet on Canelo to knock out Charlo in
either the eighth, ninth, tenth, or eleventh round. Okay, So I think it was like thirty three dollars each for each of us, for each und so it was a total of one hundred and thirty two bucks for me, Big Ben. Uh, you know whatever. That's not enough money to make or break your life, Yeah, but still enough money where you're like, ah, that was like my food money for tonight and tomorrow morning. We can get to the fight, and now I know what it feels like to have a slip in my hand and be at
the actual sporting event. We get to the seventh round, Charlot gets knocked down. He gets up at about the sixth count. He's wobbly, he's got wobbly legs. He barely makes it out of the seventh So I look at Spot, I look at Covino, I look at Rich and I was like, baby, we got money coming. And I think it would have been like nine hundred dollars that we'd all be splitting. So now the eighth round starts, he gets in there, and Benny looked like a completely fresh boxer.
He found his second wind. He made it through the eighth, he made it through the ninth, the tenth, no problem. The eleventh he starts punching Canelo in the head. The twelfth, boom, he goes the distance. It was just the most deflating, horrible feeling ever. I want my one and thirty two dollars back.
Oh that sucks. Why no, why didn't you just bet? I guess you Maybe you have the answer, maybe you don't, But why didn't you just bet on Canelo like I would have. I just would have bet.
I know you don't.
I guess you don't win as much, right is that the people?
Yeah, you don't win as much. And I think the reason why they did it that way is the last three fights in a row, they all won money by doing the eighth through the eleventh round.
Oh okay, yeah, So this.
Was like a little formula that has worked for them in the past.
Gotcha, Yeah, yeah, So it's kind of like I play roulette. You can if you bet red or black, you're you're doing you know, you've got a pretty good chance of winning. You know almost fifty percent that pesky green gets in there. Or you can bet on one of the numbers. You bet on one of the numbers, or or maybe green is a better way to look at it. But yeah, you took the bigger odds.
Right, because if you would have just did Canelo wins, then you're right. The payout would have been a lot less.
But a little is better than Yeah.
Then what we got. Yeah, And of course their wind streak comes to a stop when I'm part of the bet bastards.
Now, is this going to end your gambling career, Danny? Or will you go down the Devil's hallway again next time you're in Vegue?
What I'm going to do next time is put my money, my little budget on NFL games. Because at the end of our special Saturday podcast, we did the whole show, picked every NFL game, and we kept track of it. For whatever reason, I was on fire by far outpicked everybody. I didn't put any money down all my picks. Though I had Buffalo over Miami a couple of the big upsets,
I had it the right way. Now, some of it was just me going the other way because all three of them went with the public, and I'm like, nope, I'm gonna go the other direction. But had I actually placed my money where my mouth was, I would have been a big NFL winner. Yeah.
Well, I always want to bet against the public. You're gonna in the long run, you're gonna win. You might lose on a random week. But if you can find out where they call them the sharps, the gambling syndicates, if you can find out where they're betting, which is usually just based on the handle, which you can if you dig around the dark web, you can find the handle, not the number of tickets, because the number of tickets is often just the common unwashed betting on the games.
It's that the handle is the professional, professional money on that. And now the kiosks are cool and stuff, But I like going to the window. I'm old school. I like I like walking up the window and I have a piece of paper and you give them the numbers. Is how if you've ever placed a bet listening, and you know, I can't assume everyone has. You go to the window and every game has every team, every bet has a number aside it, and so you just give them the
numbers and then that's that's it, all right? Yes, your your irish eyes are lying. What fun of the sun? So I have not had too much fun in the sun, Danny? And why have I not had fun in the sun? I know I work at night and I'm like a vampire and all that. But speaking of vampires, tasty blood, tasty blood. Mosquitoes love sucking my blood.
They love it.
And I've talked about this in the past on this show and the radio show.
The doctors say, you eat a lot of butter if mosquitoes love.
Your blood, Oh is that right?
Yeah? Yeah, too much butter in your diet.
I thought of you ate garlic, that they didn't like garlic. So we have this beautiful outdoor space behind the Mallet mansion, and yeah, I want to enjoy some nature. Get out there a lot of trees. Why not? And I've pretty much been a homebody prisoner over the summer and now, and so because my elbows in my knees are peppered with mosquito bites when I go outside. So this past week, my wife told me that one of her co workers
had a solution. My wife, so, this person she works with, said, all right, I found out how to repel these little buggers. So I'm like, okay, I'm in. You know, what's the deal? Give me the given the thing. So she said, okay, it's Irish spring. She said that she was told the soap can repel mosquitos. There's ingredients in the Irish spring that not only keep mosquitoes away flies, a bunch of incns. So I'm like, this is great, okay, and you're sure of this, yes, So I went to the store. We
bought bars of Irish spring. We bought body wash, Irish Spring body wash, and we put Irish spring. We shaved off pieces of Irish spring, little trimmings of it, and we put them in little baggies around the great outdoor. I then took a bath shower thing with Irish Spring body wash. I then excitedly went outside. I could not have waited. I could not have been more excited to go outside, get some sun a little bit late afternoon, joy,
the trees, the smells all there. So I go out and a hand to God, Danny lasted no more than in ten minutes. Your Irish eyes are lying. It turns out.
This is a marketing scam.
I don't know who. I don't know who told this person. My wife works. I don't know anything other than what she told me. But it turns out there are some ingredients in Irish spring that are used commercially to repel mosquitoes, but they are not There's not enough. You have to have a large quantity present to get rid of the mosquitos. And so it turns out Irish spring does not have enough volume to repulse the flying insects. And so I
am going back. I did find a product I'm gonna I was surfing around the web and I found something I'm gonna try, and involves putting little cups of water around to try to get mosquitoes to have babies. And then you put this stuff down as apparably got some kind of bacteria that doesn't affec humans, but the mosquitos die, and so you want to create. You want to get the mom mosquito to come over have the babies, and then the whole family will be wiped out with these
little bugger these little bacteria like pellets or something. I don't even know if it works. It probably doesn't. But if you have an idea, not just.
You're not just a mosquito murderer. You're trying to take out a whole generation.
I am absolutely extermination. And I remember on the radio I think you were with me. I had an aunt invasion at one of the old houses I lived at and I couldn't get rid of these ants. And we asked. It was like, we need help, we need help, and several listeners recommend different They recommended different products, but there's one in particular that actually worked, and it was from a listener to the radio show. And so I'm asking, if you know what do you do to effectively consistently
get rid of mosquitoes. By the way, if you're before, you email it and say what was the thing you used to get rid of the ants. It's called the Tarot liquid ant bait is what it's called. You get it like home, Deepot lows Walmart. Those things are amazing. If you have ants, you gotta put those things down. Nothing else I've tried works like that. That is the That is the Bombiti Bombiti Bomiti Bomiti. But I gotta find the Bombiti Bombiti Bombiti. For the mosquito thing, I gotta find it, Danny.
I'll tell you what that is for us on our back patio, A big mosquito net over the top of our sun umbrella.
That's the move there.
Yeah, it comes all the way down to the ground and makes it really tough for those little buggers to even get inside.
Yeah right, maybe I'll maybe I'll go there. Speaking of you, you said because you eat butter were you just making that updated the butterly I'm a doctor, I know, I know. I was like, well, well, I'm looking at him. I did find this story. It says mosquitoes tend to find the people with the blood type oh, are way tastier than other blood types. So that's I must have TYPEO. I don't even know what type blood I have. I must have TYPEO.
Yeah.
It says people who are bigger breathe more often and breathe more carbon dioxide, therefore are more attractive to mosquitos. So there you go. That's just because I'm a big guy. Mosquitoes are the carbon dioxide.
Andre the giant must have. Add all kinds of.
Bites right, Yeah, it says the color of clothing you wear may determine whether or not you get bit Darker colors like black and green are easier for the mosquitoes to spot. So if you want to avoid getting bit up, try wearing a lighter color like white. Oh, come on, I gotta wear white when I go outside. Racist, what's up with that? Let's see here. Mosquitoes are attracted to sweat and weather. Obviously higher temperature attracted the things like ammonia, acid.
There's different kinds of acid, blah blah blah, all the things that can make you more susceptible to mosquito bites. Drinking beer now you go, can't have a bruskie. Study found that just drinking one twelve ounce can of beer can make you more attractive to mosquitoes. Oh that isn't funny, man, All right, I gotta I gotta find something. I could do the I could do the net thing, but I want to find something that will just kill them all. I just want them all day. Is there any use
for the mosquito? What do they do?
Danny?
Did they really help us at all? In any way? I don't think so. I'm going no, so Let's get to the food. You want to go to the food?
Yeah, man, even though this segment makes me hungry, let's do it.
Okay, foody fun, because we all gotta eat. We all gotta eat. Two options here, Danny. Door number one has the most popular salad dressing in every state. Door number two has America's most popular Halloween candy by state. It is October. We could save that to a later episode. Or I don't really eat salad, so that doesn't really interest me. But which one do you want to do?
Danny? I want to discuss ranch dressing.
Yeah, of course you do. Okay, all right, you know whatever, Fine, I'll play a little game. I don't care the Devil's Blood. So this goes state by state. They have done the market research and turns out that while ranch dressing is very popular the Devil's Blood in thirteen states, it is very popular primarily in the South and the Midwest. The local palette enjoys the ranch dressing. I'm happy to say that California, the favorite dressing, according to Kraft is not is not classic ranch.
Oh, it must be like balsamic or something fancy.
It is zesty Italian. I know it's the number one in California. Uh, you want to you want to pick a state here, Danny we can. I don't want to do all these states, but pick a random state.
Man. How about the great state of Maine.
A great state of Maine. That is a classic Catalina dressing. I don't even know what that is. What is a classic Catalina dressing?
I don't know?
Uh? Alright, Uh, Minnesota is classic Ranch. So bad job by them. But wis constant here at Welcko Minnesota? What about?
Oh? I'm sorry, what state are you looking at?
I was looking at wisconstant because I actually this is something I like. I put it on my burgers. I don't eat salad. Thousand Island dressing.
Good choice. I love that on both burgers and salads.
Yeah, that's a good and thousand I is number one in Alabama, number one in Kentucky, Washington, Oregon, Idaho, and Wisconsin.
So Nick Saban has it on his salads before every game, and.
Then he eats a little debbie and he dips it little debbies, he dips it.
How about South Carolina? South Casalaca, Oh Carolina.
Unfortunately that is in the South. That is classic Ranch.
Oh, smart people.
There is one state dan is see if you can figure out the state, the only state in America where their favorite dressing is chunky blue cheese eyew. That sounds bad, don't it?
Yeah? It does. It sounds spoiled and rotten. I'm gonna say Florida.
Florida, not Florida's classic Ranch Iowa, Chunky Blue's Iowa, Junky blue cheeses Iowa. What are some other odd ones? There's only one other odd one that I don't know what the hell it is, and this would be South Dakota. But the western part of South Dakota, I know, the eastern part of South Dakota, which is near Oh. South Dakota's a messed up a state completely because the part near Minnesota, which is the eastern part of South Dakota, their favorite is creamy poppy seed roast. And then the
western part of South Dakota is coleslaw dressing. So that doesn't sound good either, Yeah, what's wrong. Of course, there's only like seven people that live in South Dakota, so it's not that many people. But there you go. That's a survey done of the top across America salad dressings. Americans love to eat, and it's based on actual sales figures rather than a sample survey or Google search trends or anything like that. This is actual what people are
buying and all that. And I don't see anything else that's that's really wild. Classic Catalina seems in a lot of places, but the weird ones were creamy poppsy cole slaw dressing and chunky blue cheese.
Did you google Catalina?
I have not.
What is it? Have you? I'm looking at it right now. Let's see Catalina like Catalina Island.
I'm a fan of Catalina Island. I go there once a year. It's in off the coast of southern California.
It's that reddish, it's red. You've seen this on the shelves before.
Oh yes, I have.
Yeah.
Is it like a tomato based thing? Is that what it's got?
It in? What it looks like, at least from the photos.
Says Kettleian dressing is sweet tart, spicy and everything in between. It's kind of like me, sweet tart, spicy, yeah, all right?
Oh yeah, it's made of ketchup, vinegar, sugar and oil.
No, all right, let's keep going foody. Fun. Well, that was it, and we'll try to remember next week to do the Halloween candy, or we'll do it later in the month. Costco debuted a new item, a rare fail by Costco. They put a new item in the food court and the people have spoken and they freaking hate it. They cannot stand it, Dad Gummett. There are rumors swirling around that the roast beef sandwich will be discontinued by the Costco food Court. It has not been around very long.
People offended by the price tagine, which is much more expensive than everything else. Costco is known for cheap eatsine And I'm not a big roast beef I like a pastrami sandwich. I'm a big roast beef guy. But it doesn't look that good. And the rumor is.
That roast beef either, it tastes dirty.
It does. I agree with you, and so it's uh, they're saying it. It's likely going to be discontinued. The sandwich is getting the acts. Just put poutine everywhere, Get stop messing around. The roast beef sandwich does not look it does not look good, and it's too expensive. Do cheap or do nothing.
Yeah, yeah, so what would you bring back if you could resurrect one Costco item?
Well, I'm I've talked about the best. We I get Costco food porn from people in Canada because they have chicken fingers and poutine. Like a listener in Vancouver used to send me photos from the Costco food court and like, why don't we have that here? We should have that here. I want that there at my Costco. But if you're gonna, I don't know what what would you what would you pick?
Danny? Do you remember when Costco used to have hand dipped ice cream bars?
Yes, yes, those were good.
That was really good.
Yeah I forgot about that. Yeah, but yeah, you used to sell them back in the freezer section. Also you could buy them at the food court. I think they cost too much. I think they took too much time to make, right, because they were dipped and you could get nuts on them also o.
Nuts right, Yeah, you could get almonds on them.
Yeah that was good.
That was so good. I wish they would bring that back.
Good call. It's a good call. Costco chili apparently is back. I'm not a big chili guy. But there's a debate. People are claiming that the Costco chili is actually not chili. That this is false advertising and it is not not what you're claiming it is. There's a debate here. Costco brought back the Kirkland signature chili and according to those that keep track of this kind of stuff, is a four pound tub that has beef, onions, cheese, and ices as well as kidney and pinto beans and it there's
no beans in chili. I don't know what that is, but it's not chili. So I agree. I'm anti. I take an anti bean position with chili. Chili. I don't eat a lot, but it should not have beans in it.
It's about yeah, especially those big kidney beans so gross. Yeah, chili should be smooth. Put a little dallup of sour cream on it, dip some chips in there, and you're good to go because you can't eat a lot of that or you'll be tooting for two days.
It is the musical fruit or the musical vegetable or whatever. The yeah, all right, now we're doing foody fun because we all got to eat. That's the tagline in this. Here's interesting with there's some rapid fire one skittles, the eminem Mini Skittles is becoming like eminem Minis. They just released they're planning to us. I think it's out now. Actually new Skittle Littles, Skittles Littles they describe as classic Skittles, but only tiny and more palpable.
No, those will get stuck in your teeth.
That sounds accurate to me. Burger King launching the new Hasis and this is this is nationwide people that can't figure out whether they want fries or on your rings, so they'll screw you over and give you like four onion rings and like five fries. It's like a it's like half and half.
Yeah, screw you, burger King. You've been out of the rotation for a while.
I've not been a burger King guy in a long time. Chipotle is testing automated burrito bowl assembly, no machines for their stores. Well, they'll go automation to make sure.
Well, that sucks. That sucks because one life hack is, you know, getting the person who's making your bowl, you give them an extra little nudge on, a little more rice please, a little more of the wacamole, a little more sour cream please. By the time you pester them, you have the bowl the size of your head.
Yeah, well there you go. See that's a good strategy to have. Yeah, what else here, Well, here's the seen.
He's going to ruin it all though. It's going to measure everything. I know.
It's like I used to go to Subway and everything was all measured out. They just put it in the sandwich. I'm like, well, I want a little more. No, No, well everything's measured. You know, that's not what I want. I mean Anyway, KFC has a new for six dollars two piece dark combo meal racist that's only in Orlando and Louisville. And the baseball the Baseball Playoff's going on, Danny, Here's taco. Bell announced the return of a steal a base steel a taco So that'll be going on again. Okay,
uh Wiener Snitzeles bringing back Broadworst for October Fest. Does that excite you?
No, that does not.
You probably don't want to get brought Worst. I know they're known for their hot dogs, but I don't know. It seems a lot. All right, what do we have last last one on this and what we'll push pop culture to the Sunday Sunday Podcast. But America's fastest drive through has been revealed. It's under three minutes, Danny, under
three minutes, consistently fastest drive through in America. It is in Minnesota, Brooklyn Park, Minnesota, a custom designed two story Taco bell in Brooklyn Park, Minnesota, and they have the record. It's this craziest. I got all the gadgets and thingam a jigs and gizmo's and all that, all the innovations you could possibly have. It is the fastest drive through in the country. And you go in, you order and within three minutes, under three minutes, you.
Get your food. Yeah, it's good.
There you go. I used to spend hours sometimes in the drive through line waiting for my food because it was people in front of me and like the panty ass. All right, it is Saturday, Danny. We got college football, we got baseball players. I'll be a Dodger stadium. I'm excited about this. I'll bet the Dodger playoff game with the Diamondbacks today and then on Monday I'll be back
out there doing that. So I'm looking forward to watching a little playoff baseball with the bums, the boys in Blue and see how if they can slay the snakes and become the snake charmers and all that. What do you have going on today, Danny?
Yeah, well you tick the words out of my mouth. Go Dodgers. I'll be watching. I hope we squeezed the venom out of them.
Yeah, oh, the Dodger should unless Kershaw comes out in pukes and gives up five months and don't.
Say it, don't even say it. No, it's just going to be a day of rest, besides working on the podcast here and of course we will be back tomorrow with an action packed mail bag and pop goes the culture.
That's right, all right, have a great Saturday, Thank you for downloading. Talk to you next time. Have a great rest of your day.
Austa pasta vapulation