Cutbooms.
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to clearing House of hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
In the air everywhere.
The Fifth Hour with Me Ben Maler and Danny g Radio.
He'll be producing this podcast. You got me hanging out.
It is the end of our week and the beginning of the podcast. So what yeah, I know, Well you figured it out by now if you're a regular listener to the podcast. We do the radio show five nights a week and then we slide in to a podcast studio which is totally different. And the radio studio which is infested with cockroaches, had barbecue chips on the floor and vermin all over the place.
But the podcast studio none of that.
It's clean, it's comfortable, it's weather controlled. You don't see food all over the place. Back there's no eating in the podcast studio. No food allowed in the podcast studio. There is a jug of water, So there is water, but it's on the other side of the very valuable equipment here in the podcast studio. So today is the fourteenth day of March. Let's get right into it. And on this pod we will have at some point the
word of the week. The word of the week, and it's a word that I likely would not be able to use on terrestrial radio. But here on the podcast we don't have to worry about the FCC or any of that stuff. There's no government regulations on podcasts, at least not yet. I'm sure at some point someone will come in and.
Say, you're not allowed to do that, what's wrong with you? Blah blah blah blah.
But at this point we're good, so we don't worry about that. So we will have a very spicy word.
Of the week.
And I would like to point out that this is the last Friday until sometime in October or possibly November, that we will not have Major League baseball. Between now and next Friday, there will be not one, but two Major League Baseball games. Then there'll be a little bit of a lull, and then a week later, less than a week later, after that there'll be more baseball. The Dodgers and Cubs, as we've talked about a little bit on the Overnight show, are in Japan and they'll open
up the season coming up. And some of you are concerned, I think supermarkets, Steve and some of the other yahoos we're emailing in are you going to be covered? Yes, we will likely be covered up in LA which is perfectly fine. And the reason it's perfectly fine is you can still hear the show on the app.
It's not like you can't hear the show.
If you want to hear the show'll you'll be able to find the show.
It is not nineteen eighty four.
It is, in fact, twenty twenty five, so back in the old time.
I remember when I.
First started on Raider, and I didn't start in the eighties, but in the nineties when I started in radio and we were talking about podcasting and I was.
Like, no, I don't want to do that.
But the thing that always bothered us about the radio is that once we did the show, that was it. Like the show was done and there was really no way to hear the show. I mean, we recorded it on cassette tapes and real the real machines and.
Crap like that.
But outside of that, for those of us that worked in the building, it was fine. But if you're listening, you had to hear it live and it had to be consumed live, and it was a disposable form of entertainment. Now it's still a disposable form of entertainment. But with the podcast world and the streaming on the iHeart app
and all that. But the podcasting stuff, which is also part of the iHeart app and these other apps, you can go back and lit and then every once in a while we'll hear from Tony in the Bay Area who loves to say bad words, or we'll hear from from various other characters that'll go back and listen to the archive, the audio vault of old shows, and that blows me away, what are you doing, Like, why are you Why are you going back and listening to old
radio shows when I'm talking about stuff that happened in twenty eighteen or twenty nineteen and here we are in twenty twenty five.
But there is a sub genre of listeners.
That like to go back and hear some of those old shows and see how the show's evolved and classic moments with our friend Eddie who was of course on the show for those years and whatnot.
And you can go.
Back to some former board ops for Birdo and Danny g when he was a board op, and people that worked on the show, and the different characters that would call into the show and all that. So anyway, we'll have baseball and we will get covered up next week in the LA market, which is fine, and you can still hear the show.
If you want to hear the show, you'll be able to hear the show.
Today is a very important dat is National Potato Chip Day, and so I thought we would mix in some fun facts. That's right, fun fact on National Potato Chip Day. Now why it is on a random Friday in the month of March, I do not know.
I do not come up with these fugazy days. I don't.
But the potato chip as it is known today, goes back to eighteen fifty three the modern potato chip was born.
Yeah, what in a magical time that must have been.
So there was a chef named George Speck also known as George Crumb, and this guy is credited with being the Einstein of the potato chip, and he did it in Saratoga Springs in New York in eighteen fifty three.
And what really helped the birth of the potato chip.
The growth of the potato chip, i should say, was a very famous name that even if you have limited knowledge of writing and history, you would know this name. It's one of the great names in American history when it comes to the arts, and we're talking about Charles Dickens. And the first popular reference to the snack known as potato chip was written in A Tale of Two Cities, a famous work by Charles Dickens back in eighteen fifty nine.
So six years after the potato chip was born. There was no social media, I'm told, so they had no way to promote it, and there was no eighteen fifty three, there was no radio, there was no television. All you had was was the newspapers to get the word out. And then nineteen twenty one you started seeing mass production
of potato chips that began. So it's been over one hundred years now and in nineteen thirty two, what is considered the gold standard for the potato chip, Freedo A came onto the scene with the laised potato chips that was in nineteen thirty two. So ever since then it's been green light go. And today is National Potato Chip Day. And I also ready study because I love my studies. That said that we are predispositioned as human beings to love potato chips, And you said, what are you talking about?
Let me explain, So researchers explain it to you. So researchers discovered that in the mouth, your mouth, my mouth, the person over there's mouth, that other person over there, in our mouths, that when we come into contact with delicious fat, we can't.
Get enough of it.
It's amazing, like from the potato chip. The fat in the potato chip wonderful. It triggers a mechanism in our guts, in our innerds, and that mechanism is one of addiction. Can't get enough of it. So you literally cannot eat just one chip, because if you eat one chip, you want to eat another chip, and then another one, and another one bites the dust, and another one, and before
you know it, you've eaten the whole bag. That's it, right, And you get the whether it's a can of pringles or a big bag of ruffles, or lazed potato chips, or we just had a listener send us a bunch of delicious food from Canada.
We'll talk about that in a minute. But you can't get enough.
You cannot get enough, amazing, amazing, amazing, So National Potato Chips and they did rant I complained on the air this week. It's a little serendipitous because I'd mentioned the annoyance of buying potato chips and then half the bag is filled with is like hydrogen or whatever it is, to take up the space, they say, to procure the long life of the chip, which I think is one of the great hustles of our time.
But anyway, I digress.
While I was speaking of foot food and talking about food here to start with National Potato Chip Day, I did want to mention another factoid that I learned this week as I've been dabbling in the kitchen.
So there are thousands of.
Recipes, and once you start cooking, you realize how many FN recipes there are, but a lot of things taste very similar. And the reason that is, out of all of the different recipes, I'm not just talking here anywhere in the world, any different part of the world, the experts claim that there's only five basic tastes, five basic tastes. Despite all the different ingredients and all the different foods and all that, the five basic ingredients are sweet, sour, salty, bitter,
and umami which means savory. So that's it. That's not a list, Terry, that's a big board. That's a big board, the five basic tastes that you have and I have. Now we should also point out that over time, your taste buds do not last. In fact, when we're born, we have ten thousand taste buds. But after you turn fifty, the numbers starts to go down, down, down, down down. How low can you go? And it becomes a problem. And the other issue when you get older is you
have a diminished sense of smell. And those that study how this all works, it.
Goes side by side.
It's Batman and Robin, it's peanut, butter and jelly.
It's the taste and the smell.
And I know I lost, as you might have done, and many of us did during the pandemic when we had the COVID We lost our sense of smell. No, I actually didn't mind it, which really annoyed my wife.
She got very upstessional kid. But believe it she was so upset.
She was like, oh, she had read stories that your smell never goes comes back, and she was freaking out. And it was like, I was like, that's fine. I don't smell bad things. I mean, yeah, I don't smell good things, but I also don't smell bad things, so it's not it's not that bad.
It is okay. It was fine, you.
Know, I mean, my smell came back, and and that was that. Anyway, speaking of the five the five different tastes that you have despite all the different recipes and all that, it reminded me of the factoid about about music and how you got all these songs right, all these songs and this, that and the other thing, and it really comes down to just a handful of ways that music can be made. And to expand on that, since I'm trying to go with this train of thought
right now, here's how I'll explain it. With all the music and whatnot, there are an estimated sixty thousand songs that are put up on the streaming service Spotify every day, sixty thousand songs. There are twenty two million songs a year, and there are only twelve notes that are available that's it, that's all, and that is the basic musical building block,
if you will. So you think of the big wild world and all the different ingredients and food as we talked about, and there's only five main ways that we are able to consume that food, and then in terms of taste, and then there are only so many notes and very few.
Chords used in pop music.
And so despite all these songs, in millions and millions of songs, there's only twelve notes that are available. Yeah, put that in your pipe and smoking. So we have some foody fun. Why do we have foody fun? Why not have foody fun here? For food he fun? It's all about the foody fun.
Now. I have been eating mostly at home, but rare and appropriate. We go out.
Food got so expensive as I forget it, so I try to help the boys out.
Now, some of you guys have real jobs.
You can't go home and cook, and you got to go out, and you're covered in schmutz and you don't want to deal with all that nonsense and whatnot. So some deals here, I don't know if these are great deals or not deals, not good deals. But Arby's, which Danny G does not think much of who. They have a new deal, the big Crispy Meal at Arby's. They've debuted that six, which I guess is a good deal.
It includes the entree you have Crispy fish sandwich, Crispy Chicken sandwich, or fish and cheddar sandwich.
So one of those three you get.
Four piece potato cakes or a large fry, and then you get to drink. So I would go Crispy Chicken sandwich, large fry, curly large curly fry.
And then I'd go drink. So yeah, I don't need the fish. I'm good on that.
Prices they say mayvary in Alaska and in Hawaii. You get screwed. You live in Alaska and Hawaii. It does not go well. Pizza launched a new pizza charcuterie board for.
Pie Day, which I think is today.
Actually I think today's Pie Day, but not as fun as Potato Chip Day.
So yeah, it's today.
And the pizza charcuterie board allows you to create your own pizza board, perfect for a big party. I can't think of a cooler person than someone that throws a party with a pizza hut charcuterie board. And this falls into the gimmick marketing thing, which is brilliant. So the way this one works, build your own savory experience by mixing and matching the following menu options. You've got any two medium pizzas, so you can choose your hand tossed, your Chicago tavern style or whatever it is.
Eight any eight boneless wings.
So that's we just call those just chicken nuggets, they say sauced bite sized wings men for sharing. And then any sticks and dips so you can get golden baked sticks. Get that and put that on your charcuterie board, and all of that available for twenty four ninety nine. That seems like a good deal actually in modern times. And it's it started becoming available, I guess the other day. So actually it's been been out since March eleventh, but it's for pie Day, so if you want to celebrate properly,
you can go to pizza and get that. What else is going on in food? He fun, hooray for food he fun. Well, I didn't even know this was a thing, but it's returned to Wiener Schnitzel, my favorite German restaurant, Wiener Schnitzel and the lent friendly seed dog.
That's right.
The seed dog, fish and chips are back on the menu, Thank God, hallelujah. Prices vary, but a sea dog costs in LA four fifty nine a two piece fish and chips six ninety nine. That seems like a not a good deal. Six ninety nine for two pieces of fish? Am I wrong on that? I haven't eaten that a while. In addition to the return of the fish, because when you think hot dogs, you think fish. At Wiener Snitzel, they've launched a new cotton candy shake and a cotton
candy dip cone, So get in on that. Five ninety nine for the shake, and the cone is three point fifty nine, so you can really go for it and set yourself up for some serious issues. You get the chili dogs for four dollars every day, you get the honey battered corn dog for four dollars, four of those and just knock yourself out National Corn Dog Day, which is tomorrow on Saturday.
So there's a lot a lot of days.
I'm starting to think the only reason we have these days is to promote items, to move product, to move commerce, is why.
We have these varying days. That, yeah, what else.
Is there it's foody Fun way for food fo de fun, all right, Where to find the cheapest fast food in Americans? Does that get your attention? Does that get you all fired up? So you can still get dinner for less than ten bucks? Probably not if you're in California or in New York, But there are other places. And so there was a story I was reading this. It was in I think it was in Delish whatever that is. I don't know what that is, but I came across the story and they went through all of the.
Various deals here.
And the issue is that the menu prices vary widely across the nation, and even within restaurants like they were saying, Jack in the Box and Burger King are usually pretty cheap for burgers. McDonald's and Windy's also have solid value. In me, the general consensus is it's all about the apps. It's all about the apps. And you have to be able to go like Jack in the Box and get two tacos for ninety nine cents, which has been around for a long time. And so you end up throwing those two tacos in and.
You're good to go. And they've got a.
Bunch of Munchies for under four dollars, so they got that going for you. Dairy Queen has a seven dollars meal deal full sized hamburger French fry meal that includes a drink and a Sunday Jack in the Box has a half off.
On a burger mentioned the Munchies menu thing.
McDonald's has the app the Value Menu, five dollar deals. Taco Bell has something called the Craving Box lineup.
I don't know what it is.
They got options for five, seven dollars and nine dollars on that, and some of the items as cheap as a dollar nineteen for a taco, a softer crunchry taco meat Taco Bucks seventy nine. Windy's has the five dollars Biggie bag and go on on. Sonic is on here. They have a dollar ninety nine value menu, and if you eat at Burger King, you might want to see a doctor. No, they have the fish sandwich and whatnot at Burger Kings. So those are some of the deals
out there for foody fun. Now moving on from that, I filled in the rare and appropriate fill in on a M five to seventy, which is our flagship in Los Angeles.
And the Home of the Dodgers.
I got the call last minute, Hey, you want to do the show with Fred Rogan Rodney's away. I said, okay, I'll do the show, and so we did the show and it was only a couple hours. It was back on Wednesday, and so that inspired some of you knuckleheads.
Two people reach out to me. One guy is in let me check here. Hold on a second. No no no no no no no no no. Steve.
Steve is in Chicago, and Mike Guy and there's a lot of dudes named Michael, like, we're very popular with people named Michael. Michael is in Boston or somewhere in that area in the Northeast. And both of them said why they were listening on the iHeartRadio appening. So I thank you both. And they had a similar question. They were like, well, why don't you fill in where we are?
And it would be kind of cool to hear you talk about, you know, the Eagles or the guy and Philly going to breakdown the eg But so here's the way I'll answer that I am available for the rare and appropriate filling. You understand, though, like when I fill in, I actually get paid for it. I'm not doing it out of an active charity. They do pay me, not a lot, but they pay me a little bit, so
I gotta get paid. And I have filled in. You guys are I feel like you guys are both new to the show because over the years, I've been doing this a long time, so I filled in. I did have a side hustle for two years and it's been a minute. But twenty seventeen and twenty eighteen, I filled in on the night show on Wei and Boston. I did it remotely, and I even did the Red Sox review postgame show after I don't know how many Red Sox games. I did it a number of Red Sox games.
I was in a rotation that was me and a couple other dudes. One of the guys was a lollipop salesman that was his other gig, and good guy knew everything about lollipops and told me, like the inside skinny of like the battle for lollipops is to try to get Most lollipops are purchased at the last minute.
Nobody goes to a store to.
Buy lollipops, and the way they sell lollipops is to get that position right at the register, those last minute purchases that you don't really need but you see and you're like, hey, I got my milk and my butter, and I've got some soap, but I kind of want that lolli at the check stand, so I'm gonna take the lollie.
Yeah.
So this guy filmed me, but that was the twenty seventeen twentyeen, So get to the point, please. So the point is I am more than happy to to fill in. Now, there's some time zone issues on the East Coast which becomes problematic with my sleep schedule, but absolutely I would love to do it. I have done some of that. I mentioned the Boston thing, but I also did shows in Denver, did a couple of shows in Seattle. I did some stuff in Portland, Oregon. So I've dabbled in
that stuff. And some of the stations are cool with it and they like having somebody from the outside on. And then other times they get very protective.
You know.
It's like there's this defense mechanism that kicks in. It's like, well, you're not from here, you shouldn't be doing it, and all that stuff, which is kind of amusing because I am on these stations. I'm not allowed to fill in on stations I'm not on, which could become a problem in depending on the station. I was in Philadelphia, we have an affiliate, so I don't know how they would feel about depending what station isn't all, but the point is, yeah,
but I'm not the one to reach out. Somebody reaches out to me. If I can do it, I'll do it. It's much easier now when it's not football season to fill in, and I don't mind.
I'll talk about anything.
It's fun to do some different stuff and not do the same stuff over and over again, so I am open to it. I had a good time with Fred, and I believe I will be doing some more shows locally in addition to the overnight show on AM five seventy. Dodgers begin with the Cubs this week, and both Fred and Rodney are going to be Rodney Pete, the former Lions quarterback, are going to be in Japan, so neither one of them are going to be able to do the show. So based on that, it's fair to say
they're going to need people to fill in. So I'll let you know more details on that as they become readily available, but it was a good time. We had some fun doing that. And appreciate those of you that did listen. I saw alf was on there and Supermarket Steve and several other p ones who chimed in. Thank you for that. And you guys are very low. Wherever I pop up, you follow me, which gives me hope.
Now.
I never want to change gigs, but things happen, whatever takes place, and I know that the Malord militia will unite and follow me down the garden path wherever that takes us.
Wherever that I'll bring my machete. Time now for the.
Word of the week, the word of the word, and.
The word of the week.
This week we're going third rail while man third rail. So the word of the week in I'm inspired by Fred, the guy that I filled in for Fred Rogan on the local show in LA because Fred used the term multiple times and I've used the term and I don't have a problem.
With the term.
It's a clinical term for a female dog. The word of the week is bitch.
That is the word of the week.
We can say that on the podcast, we say it on the radio show too, but the word bitch goes all the way back to Old English, and it does mean female dog. I think most of us know that it was derived from they believe Old Norse, and the word began as a way to describe a female dog, but it over time became an insult to women over the centuries. And this is how crazy the word goes back. So one of the oldest surviving examples of the early form of the b word uses it as a derogatory
term for women in the twelfth century. Hello goes back to the twelfth century, and the early twelfth century definition was and this is via translation, it was.
Foul whores and bitches. So they went right for it.
They didn't hold back, they did not bite their tongue in the twelfth century, and so it was a curse word related to women who kind of got around, you know, and had a lot of had a lot of fun, had a lot of fun with a lot of different people and all that. And in seventeen eighty five a classical dictionary of the Vulgar tongue. So here we are not in the tenth century, we're going way.
Up to seventeen eighty five.
And they noted that the term bitch, which is the word of the week most often came to an english woman, was used by to describe an English woman, and again met a woman who was getting around, get around. But the evolution, I'm not done, no, no, we do a deep dive on the Fifth Hour podcast. So the evolution goes to the nineteen twenties and I was reading about
this the other day. So they used the term biach as a swear word that exploded in popularity, and they say it was because a pushback against feminism, which was becoming a thing and women's rights, and people were pushing back against that, and so they used that term. And then at some point the term went from a woman who got around and had a lot of fun in the bedroom, and at some point in the middle of the twentieth century, the definition changed a little bit to
a connithing, malicious or just plain bad, bad woman. And that's the definition that it became.
And that's you know.
Going back one hundred years, it's been a minute. It's been a minute. And you know, some of our friends in the gay community, they stole it and their bitchery and bitched up, and so they.
Kind of that as well.
And then over time the feminists are like, we're going to reclaim our word.
We're going to empower the word, the bee word, the bitch.
And so they attempted to get the word back, and there was a writing called the Bitch Manifesto.
Must have been riveting and to.
Find the b word bitch as a woman who, among other things is driven, achieving, overwhelming, threatening, scary, ambitious, tough, brassy, masculine, boisterous, and turbulent. Okay, wonderful, outstanding.
And then in the.
Hip hop world, the rap world, the term bitch became a thing since about the last forty years or so. It is a regular term in like rap music, and you know, going back to the old school guys iced tea and whatnot, and right up to our friend Lizzo right there.
So there you go, the word of the week, the word of the week.
Bitch is the word of the week, and not the worst thing anymore.
It's been watered down. The term bitch has been watered down.
And now I would still say the most powerful word to offend our female friend, the better half would be the C word. That's still that's the humdinger, that is the king of all swear words. That is the number on top of the heat when it comes to offensive verbiage. All right, we'll get out on that. And you got the mail bag coming up on Sunday. If you haven't sent an email in for the mail bag, you can do that. Send it in right now care of Real Fifth Hour at gmail dot com. That's Real fifth Hour
gmail dot com. Hopefully Daniel joined me for the Saturday. If not, he'll be with me. I should be with me for the mailbag on Sunday, but we will have another podcast tomorrow.
And debating whether or not.
To read an email I got from a guy who's complaining he says that the podcast The Fifth Hours changed.
Maybe I'll read that to start tomorrow's podcast. I don't know. I'll think about that.
But anyway, I have a wonderful rest of your Friday, enjoy your weekend, and we'll keep your company the rest of the weekend. New shows only available here in the podcast format.
All weekend long.
And we'll talk to you then so later. Skater and Austa Pasta screw you, Bill Miller? Is that I got that right right?
Danny? Now? All right, Rivederce, goodbye, go do something. Gotta murder. I gotta go