Kabooms.
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Wow.
The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
In the air everywhere you have stumbled upon The Fifth Hour with Ben math that's me talking to the third person and Danny g Radio hanging out every day, no days off, no days off, and it is the most popular podcast of the weekend. The mail Bag Danny, it's the mail Bag podcast.
Yeah, mail mother sucker.
Not yet, No, no, no, not yet, because we had asked to catch up. If you did not hear the Friday podcast, our first international Fifth Hour contributor, I think I don't believe we've had anyone on from across oceans on the Fifth Hour. But if you didn't hear Friday's pike, because we caught up with Jay Scoop. You know Jay Scoop. If you listened to the overnight show The Maelor show during the week. Jay Scoop is a big part of that.
He's written songs for us, he's contributed content and the talent shows, and he's just been a big supporter of what we do. And he has traveled to the Ukraine to help out in their battle with Russia, and we caught up with him from a war zone. Danny, he could have been bombed as he was talking to us and giving us the inside skinny as he was calling us from a this old it was a hotel room in the Ukraine, but he said it was an old communist building from communist Russians back in the day. So
pretty wild. And that was on Friday, and then yesterday we had the normal nonsense from the Saturday podcast. But let's get into the Safari Kingdom, which is not anything like Animal Thunderdomes. I want to remind you a disclaimer. This is a really unique, original piece of audio content that was not hijacked from anything Danny G worked on for years.
You know, it's been taking extra weeks here to get the final logo approved by Klay Travis. I think at this point, Ben that they are hand drawing this logo, so it's going to be one of the better podcast logos in the world.
I swear to God, may I recommend that you go down to Santa Monica, which is where you were last weekend. You go down to Santa Monica and they have these guys that are cartoonists that will draw a logo for you for like twenty bucks. Maybe tip them an extra ten dollars, and then you take that, you scan it, send it to the iHeartMedia corporate people and say, here we go, I got my logo. We're good. O. No, we need ten layers of bureaucracy is what we need. God,
that's what we need. As much red tape as we possibly can get. That's what we have to do. Let's speak of music. Let's go to ohio Al. Strike up the band, It's.
Time for Ben Mallards.
It's a furry kingdom with NYG Radio.
Yeah. I wonder if those animal sounds were copywritten.
I don't know what you're talking about. That sounds completely original. That's ohio Al who went into his garage and was making those sounds. That's that came from, Well.
You do a duck, that's my duck.
But that was one of the great callers of all time. But that guy didn't call back. He called twice and that was it.
I think that his duck is the only one I have in the library.
No, he did a bunch, this farmer from Georgia. I remember the guy he called up. He has this big personality and he was fun and laughing and debonair and all that.
And.
He made all these animal sounds. He said, I'm on my farm and I got, you know, I got your duck over here, quack quack, and he got you know this.
But you're right.
I don't remember the other animal sounds. I assume they would be like a cow move, you know, something like that.
Yeah, I'll have to search the main brain at the network and see if there's any more sound effects from him. I don't think there was, though, So whoever was running your controls back then only saved his duck. So it must have been maybe a stay awake with Jake.
Yeah, it could have been Jake, warned, the great Jake Warner. It was either Jake or you. If it wasn't you, it.
Wasn't it wasn't me, So it had to have been Jake or Art Martinez.
That was an all time great call, all time great overnight sports radio call. So here in the Safari Kingdom, we start out with this. You have the long and the short of it. This would be the short of it. You see the world's shortest dog has no Yeah, the world's shortest dog. And what breed of dog do you think it is?
Danny, Well, I think most people would guess that it was a Wiener dog.
A Wiener dog. No, not a Winner dog. I don't think this is a Wiener dog. It's a Chihuahua. I like the extended wiener. That's not a Wiener dog.
Right.
A Chihuahua is not a winner dog.
No, Chihuahua's a circumcised Wiener dog.
So there's a Chihuahua name Pearl that has the record as the smallest, shortest, tiniest, every gonna say it dog. It's at just three point five to nine inches tall.
Well, how do they measure this? Do they stand the dog on a tind legs?
I'm looking at some photographs. This is part of the Guinness World Record people. This dog was presented on the set of some TV show in Italy. It just happened over the weekend. It's a two year old Chihuahua and it's five inches long and weighs one point to two pounds ef ef Yeah, I'll send you a photo here.
Let me click this here, just listening, just pay attention, just to entertain yourself for a second here, and it looks like a little like a little but it's I guess grown all the way I mean, it's Let me see I sent, I think I sent twice. Let me I get another image here. I'll send you. This is the great if you're listening to the pattis it is less standing up. It is less in height than a standard thirty two ounce drink, like a plastic cup. Did you get it? Did it come through? It did not?
No, it didn't come through.
Oh my god. Do I have any music we can play while we're waiting for this thing to come through? I do not understand.
I have that on hold music that I play whenever you try to do your nicknames.
Oh you want my nicknames, Danny.
Oh that's not what I said.
You know what that's no, No, you secretly my my nicknames. That's what you're saying.
And that is on hold music.
Will I wait for the for the message to go through? And I don't know why it has a gone through. We can this is not killing time. But I have more nicknames than anyone in all of broadcasting. I have been called, among other things, the Baron of Balderdash, Cucci, Big gall Bladder, Benis, the Menace, Captain knee Jerk, the Duke of the north Woods, General of degenerates, Tycoon of Tea's, Master of Disaster, the hustler of filibuster, Master something Light
of Nightlife, pal About home Off, Pummeler of producers. But I want to mount it. Benny Brightside manatee.
Oh look at that, What a cute little dog.
No, no, no, Manitee of insanity. Marconi Maller, bunny Line Mallard, Emissary of embellishment, week Night windbag, slap me around a little bit, Wizard of Wacky, slayer of naysayers, Grand Goober Gab. Maybe you can suck on it and that'll make it better. Ola Ark of Dark, Tower of Babylon, Honest Adonis, nocturnal Colonel, I'm on drugs right now, man the underdog of monologue, and the Holy Pope of the Slippery Slope.
And Boom goes to dynamite.
Those are only some of my nicknames. Has the picture come through yet, Danny g.
Yeah, it came through a while ago, like on your second nickname.
I don't believe you. I think you're making that up. I don't think it's come through yet. I don't think you've gotten it. I think you're still standing by for that. And I don't understand why this thing is not going through. It makes no sense. It's very annoying. I think what they're waiting for is for me to give you the rest of my nicknames. No, and then it will come through.
Then. I'm staring at the picture right now.
Let me try it. Let me try this here, all right, so some of my other nicktives. I'm gonna give you the phone full manti while we wait for Danna to get this. I don't.
Yo.
All right, fine, saved by.
It's wearing a diamond necklace. Yeah, what the hell?
That's the smallest dog in the world. According to the people over at Guinness, looks like.
A long lost member of Run DMC.
That's ah, it kind of looks like Bella. To be honest, if you cut Bella's hair, it would that's what Bella looks like. Man alive. Ohkay. That took a lot of effort.
That was a lot.
Did not expect that much effort for the first story of Safari Kingdom. Well here's a great story also from the animal world. Have you seen the video did you guys talk about this on Covino and Rich this last week of an elephant that has learned how to peel a banana? Do you see this one?
No?
Yes? So this is wild. You say, how the hell could an elephant they don't have hands, How could the elephant possibly do this? Well, they learned at the Berlin Zoo. We go to Germany, the Berlin Zoo, and an elephant there learned how to peel a banana after observing the zoo keepers eating the banana. Then most elephants are like, hey,
I want a banana. I like the whole banana. I'll be like the quarterback Will Levis of Kentucky who's going to the NFL, who likes eating bananas with the skin on it, doesn't mind it, And most elephants are like,
I'm not going to try to remove the skin. But one elephant, the world's smartest elephant at the Berlin Zoo, according to a story this week, we came across here has somehow learned how to peel a banana, and scientists are they're freaking out on this danny because they say it shows that the elephant has a whole new level that they didn't think the elephant was capable of.
How does the elephant get the balance to do that? Is it step on it with a foot and then use its trunk?
Well, they they use their their tusk, you know, the big their tusk. What's the trunk, that's.
What they use, just the trunk by itself.
Yeah, So the video, the zoo keeper hands the elephant the uh, the the banana, and then they toss it down and they're they're able with their their trunk there to to peel it back.
That's crazy.
Yeah, that's wild. So that's that's pretty cool.
All right.
What else do we add? Well, if you're in Tennessee, I don't think this thing's been caught yet.
One of our.
Listeners in Tennessee, Cliff and Nashville. One of the other guys that listens in the Tennis state, Tennis. I know it's a big state. Did you see there's a kangaroo that escaped and is on the loose in Tennessee. Yeah, a pet kangaroo is on the loose, how do you do? And they're asked they're asking for the public's help in trying to track down a nine month old kangaroo named
Bo that escaped from a family home family home. It turns out that Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency does not require permits for residents in the state of Tennessee to have kangaroos. So your buddy Klayt Travis can have a kangaroo if he wants. Drum, dumb, drum, there you go, way did he go?
So that means whoever finds it can adopt it.
They say the kangaroo the what they call them, the marisopal is that what they call it marissopole or something like that. I think that's the clinical termite. Yeah, I'm not a scientist, I can play one. On the podcast, they claim that the nine month old kangaroo has not been outside very much and it got out because somebody left the door open and somebody forgot to close the door, so the thing bolted. And uh, we need our guy from Australia, from Western Australia to help us out on
this because he's he's the expert. He's the guy that his car was attacked. Remember his car got attacked by and he told us the whole story about how kangaroos when they see light, instead of freezing like a rabbit, they run towards it. They're attracted to it out in the backwoods of Australia. So would you want to have a pet kangaroo, Danny, If you were allowed to have a pet kangaroo, would you would you go down that road?
I don't think so because all the YouTube videos that we've seen they look like they could be some mean son of bitches.
I cannot get over that the photos that Ozzie was our buddy from Western Australia sent in because those were those were pretty pretty deep, pretty wid That's a lot. What else do we have on Safari Kingdom? How about this one from the bee world? The bee world, they say that male bees where perfume from different flowers to try to attract their mates. It's according to new research
on obviously the bees buzzing around and all that. So I don't know, but you think that you think that they do this intentionally or whatever flowers or around them is where they go. I'm a little skeptical on this one.
Well, we got a little bit of a battle because on yesterday's podcast to Get Scientifical, you had the report about the new perfume that's going to kill insects, perfume on perfume Crime right here.
Yeah, big weekend for perfume. Are we not on the pulse of what the average podcast consumer wants to hear hot perfume talk. Yeah, that's just what you want. That's just what you want. And we'll do one more and then we'll get to the mailbag on the Safari Kingdom. So the other story here I wanted to get to. If you have a couple of extra bucks and you want to own rhinos, good news, Danny, good news. The world's largest rhino farm, which is in South Africa, is
for sale. Minimum bid ten million dollars. With that, you get a bunch of rhinos. It requires a private army to protect two thousand white rhinos.
Nice. Yeah, I've had hippos before in my life, but never a rhino.
Well, I was a hungry, hungry hippo when I was younger and I was growing up.
I was a hungry.
But the rhino horn is, according to the story I was reading, is the most valuable thing you have not in the most part, but it's more valuable than like cocaine or gold.
This has drug dealer all over it.
Yeah.
Yeah, So this place started when the white rhino was becoming extinct, and so this is.
A white rhino.
Yeah, the white rhino racist. That sounds like a strip club. But anyway, so I think that's a spearmit rhino. That's a different type of So anyway, this guy puts some a few rhinos together with his other rich friends, and then they kept having babies and little baby rhinos. And this is a generation ago and now this thing's gotten completely out of control. And the reason the rhinos are so valuable is because of the substance on their horns. Is it's the same stuff from like your fingernails and
all that. But in certain cultures, in Asian cultures, it is believed that it has magical powers. For example, in Vietnam, they ground the herotine from the rhinos, so they grind it into a powder and they think it is a medicine to fight cancer. That's yeah, and that's that's not proven scientifically, but that's what they think. And if people think it.
So they do they poach on them then because they're trying to get the medicine.
Well, yeah, that was the problem. And so this guy who owned all the rhinos, he was like, well, I found a way to take the rhino horns off without hurting the rhino and then they'll grow back, So why don't we do that? But everyone outlawed him from doing it, so he couldn't make any money. So the guy's like, he's blown his entire fortune. One hundred and forty three
million dollars. This guy has spent on these rhinos and he can't get the money back, and now he's going to sell He's in his eighties now, so he's like, ah, I'll sell it. I'll get ten million dollars and get out of here. In China, they wear the rhino horn as on like a bracelet or on certain other items to indicate their wealth. It's like a sign of great luxury if you have rhino on. How about the fact that you need you need an army of people, including helicopter.
They have a helicopter that keeps track of possible poachers. They have all kinds of sensors and all that. Because people are wanting to attack the rhinos so often and that's nuts.
Male a lit man. That's crazy. Leave the damn rhinos alone.
He got ten million, Danny, you can move to South African and own two thousand white rhinos that are not worth but they're worth a lot, but you can't actually sell them.
So I'm eoe man. I'd have some black rhinos too.
I hear you.
I hear you, you'd mixed. Well, what have you put a there's a there's a joke there. But I think we'll leave it. Let's get to the mail bag. Right now, here we go.
It's this mail bag, and.
Right to it. We start out on the mail bag with Neil from the Real Miami. Our buddy Neil. He says, not for long, though, guys, in a dramatic fashion. I just got an offer on the condo. This is a beautiful, picturesque condo. It's in one of those skyscrapers in Miami, overlooking the Miami Heat Arena's beautiful luxury. He says, just got an offer on this condo. And we are moving, changing the scene from the land of Cartoon of TNA and Bentley's to Ashville closing May seventeenth, So I have
to cancel my plans. For the Malor Meet and Greet in Minnesota, which was a free trip for me as my headquarters are in Minneapolis. He says, that's a bummer. Well, technically, I'm just saying here, Neil, that if you close on the seventeen, it's conceivable that you could still make it on the nineteenth for the twentieth Malard Meet and greet. It's still an option. And sometimes these things get delayed or they end up closing earlier.
Yeah, it's a good point. And I could see him pulling up with a big U haul truck.
Yeah, bring the family and bring all your crap. And I know that that's not exactly the direction you're planning on heading. I think when I hear Ashville, I'm thinking of the Carolinas, Right, it's certainly conceivable. There's I'm sure there's more than one one of those locations with that name.
Let me let me look it up here, North Carolina.
Yeah, that's the one I've heard of. I haven't heard of any other Ashville's, so, but good luck with your your movies. Moving is a great opportunity to catch up on all the Fifth Hour podcasts that I missed since the end of January. But he says, guys, this is your show, not mine, the real Neil or soon to be just Neil, not from the real Miami, Neil from Ashville. He says, here's my question for both of you.
What is.
The third place? Your third place? And he says, let me explain. Home is your first place. Work is your number two. Third place is a place you go to escape, and number three is different from everyone everyone else, like for example, Gascon would pick the gym casino for your crazy dude you interviewed once. Oh that's Scott Parrell. I think he's stopped yeah on the bench massage parlor for you know who? Well, what about for you? What about for you? So is this something you have to do
a lot? That's my first question. This is something you have to regularly do, because my number three is not something I do all the time, but I've I enjoyed a lot. I'm a big fan. So I'm gonna say my number three is either sitting on a beach chair looking at the waves on the Mighty Pacific, or what I really love to do but I don't get to do it more than once a year is go to the sequoia A National Park and the giant forest and wander around and observe these three thousand year old trees
and you feel like you're in Jurassic Park. I love it. I absolutely love it. What's your number three?
Danny?
From his examples, it sounds like something you do every week.
So, yeah, you don't have to spit at my answer, you know.
I'm just saying, like, you know, do you go sit at the park like you used to do when you fed the ducks back in the day, because that probably was your third place back then.
Yeah, that was my third And we're getting into the warmer time of the year, so we will be going to the beach quite a bit. So I if you pin me down for an answer, beach beach.
Beach, Yeah, where I'm at. We're fifteen minutes away from the beach in the summer. Guess I would say that would be the third spot too.
Okay, And Neil also says thank you for red killing me with roach Coach Reality on food Trucks, You're welcome. Guy named Amish writes in he says, originally from the five one three, currently living in the six to one four, have you guys ever visited my hometown of Cincinnati? Or King's Island up north in Mason. That's where Dan Patrick grew up.
Oh yeah, I've heard DP talk about that before.
Dan Pew. If you have, did you try Skyline or gold Star? Chili Chile is a big deal in Cincinnati. I am pro Skyline over gold Star. So to answer your question, I'll go first the Amish. I have not
technically been in Cincinnati. I have been to the Cincinnati Kentucky Northern Kentucky NA International Airport, but that is actually in Kentucky, so I've changed flights in that airport a few times over the years, going to the Northeast when the people that were paying for the flight were too cheap to buy a direct flight, so I had to change flights. So I have stopped in Cincinnati, and it is on my list. I would love to do a show from Cincinnati, or maybe not do a show, do
a mallor meet and greet from Cincinnati. We've got Minnesota coming up in May May twenty if hopefully going to get to Maine later this year, and I'd love to get to Cincinnati. The only problem with that, and I'll tell you right now, the only problem is that my wife would like to go to Europe. She would rather go to Europe, and I want to go to Cincinnati. Who do you think is win?
Danny? Who do you think your wife he's gonna win?
Probably so? Probably?
So?
Have you ever done any time in Cincinnati? Or excuse me, been to Cincinnati, Danny?
No, I haven't. I would love to see a Reds game for whatever reason. My grandfather from San Jose before he passed away, when I would visit him in his garage, he had a whole bunch of Cincinnati Reds stickers and magnets on his refrigerator in his garage, and he told me that he was a fan of the Big Red Machine. And even though that wasn't his local team, he was a fan of that lineup. He loved those guys. So
that would be cool. And we had Andy Furman or was it a listener who sent us Skyline chili in the mail?
Remember Andy Furman?
Was it Furman that sent it to us?
He sent a nice gift pack. Two guys is enough.
For me, that's right? And so we all went home and cooked it up. It was It was really good. I liked it.
I did not end up cooking it up. I did not have these scyline Chili.
What'd you do with it?
I give it to Eddie. Oh, I don't even know if Eddie had it. I think he did. I don't think he.
I don't think he liked it. Little taste.
Lee in Phoenix Rights in thank You for that homish? Lee in Phoenix Rights Since says, did you know you're all? Do you know all your family's birthdays? Lee says, do you know all your family birthdays and anniversaries?
No?
Well, well technically know, Lee. If I didn't have my phone, I wouldn't know, But everything's in my phone, so I look at your phone. That's what we all did. Anyone memorize this stuff?
I know, just like how most of us don't even know the phone numbers of our significant others and people around us. Like maybe we know one phone number, but remember when we were ben when when we were kids, we had a whole bunch of phone numbers and addresses in our heads all the time. And then once we got iPhones, no more, we don't have to memorize shit.
Remember being a little boy and back in the day you just run amuck. And my mom before she let me run out, and the Orange Groves in Orange County. She's like, all right, you got to memorize my number. Repeat my number, repeat my number, repeat my number. And to this day the number does not exist anymore. I'm sure someone else has that number. They're all gone, my parents, but I can still repeat that home phone number, verbatim, verbatim. I know everything. That is the number I know, and
it is tattooed in my brain. Danny, and you're probably the same way with the mom's number when you were growing up.
And the whole thing, not just that. I remember the address for rialto California as a little kid because they made us recite the address. Let me hear the address, because they let us wander around the town back then, Oh for sure.
Yeah, and be like, all right, get lost if it gets dark and you go to the store and tell the personal store your address, and they'll call the police and they'll take care and everything will be good there and all that. He'll Billy Mike rites into the mailbag. He says, Hey, big Ben and Danny g we've all been forced to see a chick flick from time to time. Have either of you found that you really liked one?
And if so, what was it? Mine was the my Big Fat Greek Wedding, which turned out to be pretty funny, so funny, we watched the second one, which turned out to be even funnier. He says, also, did you admit it to your wife or girlfriend at the time, or did you keep it to yourself? So most movies these days are either action films or chick flicks because Hollywood's determined that's the audience they're going for, and women are usually the ones that decide what movie people see, and they,
as a general stereotype, women like chick flicks. So yeah, I've seen a bunch of chick flicks. I did, like my Big Fat Greek wedding. The wind decks just spray wind de My wife would say that, I'm like that with garlic, Like you know how the guy would spray wind decks. Yeah, like, oh you gotta garlic, take garlic, you'll be fine. That's my wind decks and all that. I've seen a bunch I'm trying to think of off
the top of my head. There's not one that really is popping into my head is like my all time favorite. But I can go back to the old days. Sleepless in Seattle. That was a chick flick there was. There have been a few sports movies that were actually chick flicks that were disguised as sports movies, which is a few baseball movies with Adam what Not, which is Kevin Coster, a few of the Any Danny, you look like you have something that you're dying to say. Here a chick flick.
That you like.
No, I was thinking about, Well, it's because I was thinking about her booty, first of all. But j Lo has been in some good chick flicks. I don't know if it's because I was attracted to her and so she made the movie awesome. She made the movie wonderful. But I think I think about that movie made in Manhattan. And then there's another movie she's in with Matthew McConaughey that I watched with my Wifey not too long ago.
It's an older movie, but she's about to get hit by a dumpster and he saves her and he turns out to be a doctor and all this stuff. Now, if she's in the storyline, Ben, I can follow along with that storyline, even if it's cheesy.
I got one pretty woman, right.
Okay, that's a classic.
That's a chick flick right.
Yeah, that movie made it okay to be a prostitute.
Yeah, it's like Kim Kardashian made it okay to be a porn star, and that movie made it okay to be just an old fashioned prostitute. Next up on the mailbag, Kyrie and Okase, He says, Hey, guys, how's it going. My question is is there a word or adjective that your wife used is constantly or even you use constantly like my wife is used using that's wild in like every other sentence that drives me nuts. Kyrie says, I believe she got it from you. Big Ben oh As
always thinks for everything you do. So anything that your wife says repeatedly that gets under your skin, there, Danny, that is a what do they call it? A what's the term? I forget the term. There's a there's a clinical term for it when you keep repeating certain things. We know from working in radio that in the old days, we used to meet with program directors and they would say, they would nitpick. You know, you're using that word too much. You got to come up with it.
They called it. They called it your crutch.
Yeah, yeah, exactly, crutch.
Yeah, word crutches, and so we're very aware of our own crutches. But uh my girl, you know what I've noticed, and I try not to mimic it. I do my best. She'll say and like and like, just like your usual southern California girl who lives near the beach. And then he was like, and I was like, and I was all and.
He was all.
And when somebody says that a lot around you, you start saying it too. So I'm guilty of it as well to I try to knock it off when I notice it, though.
I'm the same way, and typically at the end of the week, as I'm trying to forget everything that happened on the show, but I will go back and in my head, I'm going to try to process did I fall into certain traps where I say the same.
Word over and over again?
And there are certain transition words that I will end up using that I realized I use them way too much,
and so I've tried to enhance my lexicon. It's one of the reasons that I'm always attempting to add new words and unlock different parts of the language so I can keep it fresh, because I do not want to just have everything go stale, so I do attempt to add different words, and some of them stick, like hullabaloo, that's an example, or orange swaggle, things like that bya being by the boom, which I stole from Tony Soprano.
Little things that you add to keep it fresh. But there are those difficult points where you realize that you have said the same word every show for the last week in a certain context. Why are you doing that? As far as my wife is concerned, she's been pretty good about changing up. Every once in a while, she'll fall into a trap. We all do, and sometimes I'll point it out, but often I won't because I do not want to start a fight. Danny and I try to.
Yeah, just like how you never tell a woman during an argument to calm down.
That is an escalator, that is pouring gasoline on a little ember, is what that is? That does not go well? Thanks Kyrie Terry in England, right since says, will you tell the story of why you had to stop attacking Major League Baseball? Did Scott call you during the day? Terry from England?
Terry, I feel like bet is it because the Angels gave you a backstage pass and now you've made amends with Baseball.
No, no, I can't tell the whole story until the company fires me again, and then I'll tell the whole story. So I will not do that right now. Here's what I will say, Terry. I got in the cross hairs of Major League Baseball. Some of the people at Baseball were monitoring our show, and they were a little upset with my constant barrage of attacks on the in Houston. They did not appreciate some of my commentary. They felt
that I had crossed a line. They were in the process, major League Baseball of trying to run interference for the Astros, and I was someone in the media that was not playing along and I stepped on some toes there. And this is based on what I've heard. I don't know all the exact details, but it does appear that my commentary reached certain levels that it does not normally reach. Danny, and they decided to make some phone calls, and so I was called into the principal's office.
Damn, you are enemy number one.
Which to me tells me that I was on the right side of history that they were. If a multi billion dollar corporation is trying to stop the message from getting out. That tells me that message needs to get out. But no, I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong on that, Danny, I don't know, Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe did you like the tweets from Evan Gaddis?
Yeah? Those are They're so powerful. Now, this is such an easy thing for these people that were part of the Astros. They're so they don't even realize they're disgraceful, pathetic, and everyone thinks this is cringeworthy. They're just like openly talking about it. They're not even afraid of anything because they know the Asstros. They have a guardian angel at the league office, a bodyguard, and they'll protect them. They
can do whatever they want. They will never drown. There's always a lifeguard on duty.
Screw those dudes.
Alf the Alien, Opina writes in from the parking lot of the Basketball Hall of Fame. Ben, have you or would you ever consider adding a fun fact segment to the Fifth Hour podcast, possibly devoting an entire episode to fun facts. You could broadcast nine days a week. I'm sure Danny and missus Mallard would be all for it, unless they're not, He says, fun fact, I have never been to any of the three incarnations of the Basketball
Hall of Fame that have existed in my lifetime. The closest I've come was two weeks ago when I took my wife for her birthday with my kids to a restaurant in the building that houses the shrine the Muffett McGraw. And he then sends a photo here says, see below a thirty five dollars drink that his wife shows for herself that came in a mini bathtub with four straws.
Wow.
So he lives right down the street from the Pro Basketball Fame. Never been there. I have only been to one of the big museums the Hall of Fames, and that was the Hall of Champions, the NCAA Hall of Champions in Indianapolis. And it was such a terrible museum. I no longer want to go to any other musicians. It was terrible. It was just they were trying to be politically correct, Danny. But I'm there to see the basketball in the football I'm not there to see the
rowing people. I don't care about the softball team. I'm sorry, not sorry.
What about Canton? Would you want to go to the football Hall of Fame?
I don't know, like if your team.
Was playing in the Hall of Fame game, you could double dip.
No, I don't.
I don't even like the Hall I'm so jaded these days. I don't even like the Hall of Fame game anymore. I'll tell you a story though. Years ago, I was driving from Buffalo back down to New York City. So I was driving through the middle of New York with my brother on the expressway there in New York, and there was a trip that we could have made to Cooperstown. I love baseball Cooperstown, New York. But it would have added in extra a couple of hours to the trip. I said, no, uh, he should have did it.
You only get one shot, Like Eminem says.
I know.
I do like the presidential museums. I've been to a few of those, and I've been to three presidential museums, and those are kind of cool because they're interactive and I've enjoyed I've enjoyed those. Next up, we have Mike and Fullerton, he says, Ben and Danny g with all the Laker fans realizing they have no hope in the playoffs after barely squeaking by the shorthanded Timberwolves in the
dopey playing games. I would like to do Danny G a favor by inviting him to hop onto the bandwagon for a team set for a title run, the people's team, the Clippers. There's room on the bandwagon for now, but it is filling up fast. Don't get left behind, Danny G Radio.
He makes a good point, because the Clippers have an extraordinary history in the playoffs. I'd be a fool not to join your bandwagon.
The street tells you what has happened, not what's going to happen. What is still wrong with the Clippers. And if history was the indicator, the Lakers would not be in the playing tournament the.
Player and if I listened to you, they wouldn't be in the playoffs or playing or anything near it.
How was I supposed to realize that the NBA would put the officials on the test.
So there's always an excuse and a reason if they win anything, it's never going to change. So I get it. I get your storyline.
Number one, It's not an excuse of its reality.
So if the Wolves had pulled off that game, they missed all those shots at the end of the game they needed to make to put the Lakers away. They couldn't hit their shots there at the end of the fourth quarter, but if they had, then you still would be talking about how the refs were on the Lakers' payroll.
Second point I would like to make here, dude, it officiating, and that the purpose of officiating is not to have lopsided games. You want, ultimately the game to be decided by the players on the field.
Or the court.
And if you sway it one way, and if you give a huge advantage to one team over the other, you then have taken that away from the players and you're now influencing the outcome of an event. And that's what's been going on in the NBA for years. And if I was a Laker historian, I would not admit.
To it either.
I would be like, oh, you're just a conspiracy guy and all that. I was texting a buddy of mine who's a historian, and he's like, well, you probably think that the Earth is flat. You're like Kyrie, and I'm like, Okay, of course you would say that, Because if I was the beneficiary of this kind of scam, I would not want anyone to out the scam. I get it, I get it.
Enjoy. Kevin Durant enjoy it.
I will enjoy when he gets hurt. Maybe he's already.
Heard join Paul George on the bench.
Mike said, please keep giving fun facts during Eddie's updates. The Bennetts might hate fun facts, but the listeners don't. It's my way of dressing up, touching up Eddie's work. That's my way, my homage to help Eddie out, because you know, sometimes Eddie just does the same exact update every hour, so I like to dress it up and add some fun facts. Clayton from Dodge City, Kansas rites in Clayton must be the reason when I do those Draftking commercials I have to give Kansas the casino in
Kansas a plug. It's because of Clayton, must be. He says, have you ever hunted chinchillas? You ever hunted a chinchilla? That's I think a rodent. Isn't a chinchilla a rodent?
I remember seeing a chininchilla coat on a movie. I've never actually seen a chinchilla in life, or even touched a chinchilla coat before of you.
No, I have seen New York City subway rats, which I consider chinchillas the version of the chinchilla, because they're just rodents. They're part of the rodent family. You've seen one, you've seen them most.
They have fancy fur, right.
Supposedly, I've never hunted chinchillas. Are those big in Kansas? Or chinchilla is very popular in Kansas?
Yeah, I'm looking. I'm looking at one right now. Wow, those are some. They're ugly and cute at the same time. That's that's impressive.
So they've crossed the rubicon at some point. Yeah, so ugly you become cute.
Well, they're no. The nice fur is what makes them look kind of like a like a fluffy cat. Let's say. They're slightly larger and more robust than ground squirrels. And they're native to South America.
Some chinchilla fun facts. They can live up to up to twenty years as pets, but they need special care supposedly, and and they have the densest fur, as you said, of any land mammal, eighty hairs per follicle. So that's exciting.
The fur trade for them goes back to the sixteenth century. It's popular due to its extremely soft feel, which is caused by the sprouting of sixty hairs on average from each hair follicle. The color is usually very even, which makes it ideal for small garments or the lining of larger ones. Interesting.
Do we own stuff or do our wives own stuff with chinchilla fur? Probably so?
I thinks I don't know. My girl's wearing a hoodie right now.
Okay, well she's the ultimate excuse. She's got the trump out.
What do you want? What do you expect?
Daring? A living being? These things? They live in colony, up to one hundred individuals communicating. They squeak, bark and grunt. Oh wasn't that nice? Interesting anymore? Chinchilla fun facts? You want to shore?
Yeah, they clean their fur by taking dust bats o' fun.
In fact, they're active at dawn and dusk. They like it cool and dark, So do I cool and dark? There you go.
They can sleep for long periods of time. They must listen to your live show.
There.
I think we're good on chinchilla fun facts. We will move on. Thank you for that. Clayton Nick and Wisconsin right senceays Moneyball Mallard and Daddy G. Besides Earth, which planet in our solar system do you think would be where you would want to live if all planets were inhabitable. So this is not a planet. But at night when I look up at the Moon, I'm like, why don't we.
Just go there?
Why don't we live on the moon. It'd be fun. We can live on the Moon and then every night people on Earth would look up and they'd look at us. Be fun.
I mean, the coolest looking planet, of course, is Saturn. And my aunt, who worked for NASA for over forty years, she used to send me the coolest pictures that they took from space of Saturn, and I'm interested in that. I was always interested in that planet ben from the pictures. But that would be really cool to like look out and see the ring around your planet.
Yeah. I have read some stuff over the years, and I don't know if this is real or bullshit. That like on Jupiter, they think some of the moons on Jupiter may actually allow that at some point, they might have allowed people creatures to live on them. I mean, Jupiter is pretty far away though.
It says Jupiter is the beast to Saturn's beauty.
Beauty and the beast. What about Pluto's little pebble, Pluto's the one that was a planet then wasn't a planet and then became a planet again, and wasn't Who's somebody was it Clayton Kershaw's grandfather or something like that was involved with Pluto? Right, wasn't that the story helped name Pluto or something?
Yeah, that rings a bell. Jupiter takes its role as a gas giant very seriously. The behemoth is the biggest planet in the Solar system. Did you know that about Jupiter?
I did not know that girls go.
To Jupiter to get more stupider.
Here it is. I was not wrong fighting Kershaw. Dodger Pitcher, his uncle, not his father or grandfather. His uncle, Clyde Tombao, discovered Pluto in nineteen thirty. Fun fact, daring, that's not my favorite kush Off fun factor. We talked about my favorite kershoffre jingles. So from the Solar system to the radio system. Yeah, Clayton Kershaw his father who worked in radio as a jingle singer in Dallas at the Great Jingle House in Dallas where we love jingles and his
father saying those jingles back back in the day. One of the more successful sons of a radio person.
I know.
I was the guy that used to be our morning guy at Fox before Mark Patrick Mark Patrick on Sports from Indianapolis. His son became a closer for the Washington Nationals. And that's a fun story we've talked about years ago when Mark was working. I was doing the Overnight show and Mark was doing the morning show and he was in Indiana. I was in LA But we would correspond via email and his kid was in high school and was debate whether he was kind of letting me he
was sharing his kid's story. His kid is a guy named Drew Storin who was a closer for the Washington Nationals and pitched for a couple of other teams. But he shared it so he's like, well, I was thinking about going to college, but he might go to the
Gun He's gonna get drafted. And then he ended up going to college and eventually it was it was really cool following his career and I got to meet Drew when he came into Dodger Stadium with the Nationals and he had some big years and kind of flamed out. But he's the son of a radio guy. And there was a player for the Padres. Remember there was a writer named Ross Newhan for the La Times. Baseball writer. His son, David Newhan was like a fringe utility major League baseball player.
So there's that.
Oh my god, look at the clock here.
Oh, because we did Animal Kingdom and then the mail bag, it was a bonus Sunday.
Can we do rapid fire real quick? We're one thought on these Yeah, yes, rapid fire. Let's go er mailbag. Nick in Wisconsin is moneyball Mallard Daddy G. Besides Earth, which planet? We already did that? One bad job by me? Fred in Spring Texas, he says, sounds so flustered. I was so taken back by this rapid fire exactly. FREDA, don't buck fredit, Spring Texas, says Ben. Does your wife have any funny stories from her job as a nine
one one operator? Yes, yes, we have a lot in common, Fred, Well, nine one one operators deal with the worst, the worst that call up people are dying and stuff. A lot of their job is alcoholics and drunks that call up that just needs somebody to talk to, much like my job. So we have that in common. We have that in common. Scott from Maine says Ben and Danny G. Do you guys like baseball analytics? No, No, too much, too much,
analytics that I do not. It was fine, It's fine in a little bit, little bits, but too much moderation is the key with analytics.
I would like it to be thirty percent of the game. Seventy percent should be your gut in your brain.
Exactly, exactly exactly, and we'll just get out on this last one. From Mike in Minnesota, he says, Benny, any update if you haven't given it yet this weekend? Any update on the venue for the Minnesota meet and greet? Mike, No, No, unfortunately, no update. My friend Regina is working on that, along with a couple other listeners that have gone out looking at places. There is one local pub guy runs a bar in Minnesota who says that he's interested in hosting
the event. So I've i gotta sell this, Danny. We're getting close to a month out, so I believe by April. I'm gonna set to date April twenty fifth. If we don't have a venue by April twenty fifth, I will then take over the full pursuit and we will have a venue by May first, and otherwise we can't do it. So I will have a venue selected by May first, but we at this point sitting here in mid April. We do not have something yet lockdown on this podcast.
Today we found out that a killer backup plan is the back of Neil's U haul truck.
Yes, Neil from Miami who's leaving and moving to Asheville, North Carolina, will be taking all of his family that live with him in Miami and will be taking them to Minnesota. They don't know this yet, and they'll be hanging out with hollering James and Hayes and all the other friends. Doc Mike's gonna be there. Quite the scene in Minnesota. This is gonna be the party of the year, the social event of the year in Minnesota. It's gonna be amazing. We'll get out. Thank you, Daddy, great job
as we thank you for listening. Appreciate that. I'll be back on the radio tonight. I should be back unless unless something happens that will allow me not to be back. There is this possibility I might not beyond tonight.
Uh uh oh, MLB getting in the way again.
Oh no, no, no, no, there's there's one thing I'm waiting for. It's a yellow light. Most likely I'll be on tonight, possibly from a different location than the normal location, but otherwise I'll be back tomorrow and anything you want to promote.
Danny, no, nothing right now, support Covino and rich On Monday. It's going to be a rare and appropriate day off for me as I take care of the WiFi and a doctor's appointment.
Sounds good. Have a great rest of what is your weekend? If you're listening to us on Sunday, and if not, whenever you listen, have a great day.
Asta pasta, got a murder. I gotta go.