Kubbooms.
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Wow.
The clearing House of Hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now in the air.
Everyway you have stumbled on to the Fifth Hour with me, Big Ben and Danny g Radio. You hear me during the week on the overnight show. You hear Danny with Covino and Rich during the coveted afternoon drive slot. Is that what you call it, the afternoon drive slot.
We actually call it the coveted afternoon drive slot.
Yes, the very important coveted however you want to say it there afternoon slot. So Danny's with them during the week, and then we form Voltron here on the weekend. Happy twenty fifth day of August. It is one of the final Sundays without NFL real NFL football.
I don't believe it, man, I can't wait.
We got to get through today and then next week and then the following week it's on. But more importantly, you do not have to wait, because this Thursday, the maiden voyage of season two of Benny Versus the Penny, the TV show was renewed by NBC in a shocking move, one of the great upsets in the history of television. Season of Benny Versus the Penny It'll begin on Thursday
of this week, and we're going national this year. If you missed the Friday podcast with Looney Tunes, Benny Versus the Penny not only on regional cable channels NBC Sports all their regional affiliates, but will also be on Peacock, so you'll have a chance. No excuses to miss Benny Versus the Penny this year. It is available to every man, woman, and child who has access to the Internet. And it's fair to say, nanny, if you can get your hands
on the podcast, you're likely on the Internet. Therefore, you have no excuse to not be watching Benny Versus the Penny. So excited about that. But the real NFL begins the season actual games a couple of weeks away, and today is also not only the twenty fifth of August, it is national Banana split day. Now, I liked the bananas, so I don't love it. I've only eaten a few banana splits in my life. I enjoyed them, but it's not something I go out of my way to eat.
Bananas are really filling. So my memory of the few times I've had one as you feel sick after eating in it.
Yeah. My favorite dessert is from the chocolate shop that your family owns, the Gia Delli's, which I love the cookie Sunday, the Giri Delli cookie sound. Yeah, it's just a wonderful dessert. It's the perfect dessert when I celebrate a big achievement in my life, I go to get that. And there's one in Hollywood, obviously, all over the Bay Area, in San Francisco, there's one in San Diego. The one in Orange County is at Disneyland, so you've got to pay like three hundred dollars to go in there. So
I don't go to that one. I don't go to that.
My family we call that store seventeen.
That's right. Fun fact time, though, we got a fun fact. Are you ready for a fun fact? Of course you are, And all right, fun fact the banana split. What's the origin. The original banislet was not created in an ice cream parlor, but in a pharmacy. How about that. Banana splits were the brainchild of someone named David Evans Strickler, a pharmacy apprentice.
The great I never heard of him.
You don't know who that. Come on, that's bad banana split knowledge by you. Shame on you. So he was a pharmacist apprentice who enjoyed experimenting with new soda fountain Sundays. It was just futsing around in his spare time. And these things were so popular with the college crowd that students in nineteen oh four paid ten cents double the price of a normal Sunday, and the legend was born.
So you can thank a pharmacist. I'm a doctor. I don't know that he was able to patent that and make any any real money, but yeah, the guy, Yeah, he's an alumnus of Pittsburgh, the University of Pittsburgh. So one of the great accomplishments.
He was another great American hero.
He was twenty three years old and he invented the banana split. And without him, we would just have to eat regular Sundays, not have that. And yeah, the fun fact. In addition, the bonus fun fact here the guy that invented it. He has been honored by the University of Pittsburgh. The bananas but one hundred and twenty years old today and they had a big ceremony years ago at Pittsburgh to celebrate this guy. So I think that came from somewhere in the Pittsburgh area, the pharmacy there. So anyway,
there you go. Fun fact. Moving on, we have the mail bag. Why don't we just jump rightding he want to jump right in. Let's jump right into the mail bag. What do you say?
And first it's bang, Thank you very much, Ohioal Steve in Maryland rights and these are actual questions by actual listeners like yourself.
If you would like to send a question in for a future podcast, you can do that care of the Real Fifth Hour at gmail dot com. Real fifth Hour, no numbers. Just spell out all the letters R E A, L, F I, F T H H O U R at gmail dot com and put your name. If you want some podcast love, put your name on there. This one comes from Stephen Maryland, says Danny G and Big Ben. We know this is not a political podcast, however, did you gents watch any of the d n C from
Chicago this week? Uh? I I did not. I saw you know what I did, Danny. I I watched some of the clips that were bouncing around of the more outrageous moments. But did I watch. No, I did not sit and watch. I'm not that into it. I'm not I was watching ballgames. I'm a loser, I guess. But no, Steve, I did not watch. I did not sit down and watch the speeches at the at the DNC, and nor did I watch the Republican Convention that was in Milwaukee. I mean, I saw a little bit of Halkgan, just
because I like Hulk for brother my childhood. But I just I don't care. Even if I agree with you politically, I just can't stand blowhearts, and every politician's a blowhards, so I I generally try to avoid watching those things. Yes, yeah, I don't know about you, Danny, but that's.
My one hundred percent agree with you. We have that in common.
I didn't watch either politics, not really my jam. I read, you know, every day, I read online articles about stuff both sides are saying, and so I think I'm in touch with what's going on. But those things remind me of hype videos. You know, everybody's hyping each other up. Everybody's brilliant.
Yeah, they have all the answers, right, we're gonna, you know, make the world better and all this stuff, and yet they never seem to actually make the world that much better, you know what I'm saying. Like they have all the antics,
and they've got all the escapades. They're like when I was a kid and and we didn't have the internet, you know, decide to watch just regular TV and everyone so why I'd flip over to like Benny Hin and the like the religious revivals, you know those like these these political conventions in many respects are like religious survivals. Like yeah, you're you're on the right side and your you know, this is like a worship service. We're we're right,
our dogma's right. And I don't know, just just a little a little too much for me, but but thank you, Steve.
I'm happy we're in sports, you know, as Looney always said, the Toy Department of Radio.
Yes for sure. Alfie an Pineer writes, and he says, fun fact, on your ride to the from Burlington too, or from Burlington, you could have visited the MGM sports book in Springfield, mass By adding a single hour to your journey, Alf says, does Fullerton have a sports book? I'm asking for a friend. See this is the rivalry between Alf and Mike and Fullerton. But Alf, let me point out that I would have loved to have gone
to Springfield. I've told the story before. My grandfather, my mom's dad, was someone that grew up in Springfield, mass And I would love to go. That the weather was terrible today. We drove out to Vermont to see Arnie, and so I didn't want to spend any extra time in the rain other than what we had to spend.
But at some point, and hopefully they keep picking up the TV show, and I'll make many more trips to Boston in the Northeast, and as long as the show's produced out of Boston, and I'll make my way to Springfield if the weather's better. The idea of going to a sportsbook, though, I think my wife probably would have killed me. Say hey, let's just go to a sports book, so I can I bet some baseball games here while we're we're hanging out. Why not? That'll that'll go?
Well? Sure?
What could go? Wrong. What else do we have? Let's see this one is from from Mike and parts unknown. Did not say we got a lot of guys named Mike that listened to He did not say where he is listening from anyway, says Benny and Danny. A guy from Vegas. You see the story. He had a hair transplant that went wrong, and he tried to get on a plane in Miami and they kicked him off because he had He sent me a photo here there's like did you see this? There's like blood from the guy's scalp.
It looks a lot.
No, I haven't seen this. I was going to insert soul glow.
Yeah, that's all old.
I thought it was going to be some sort of product or you know, maybe he had to rub like some healing bomb on there.
I didn't know it was going to be blood.
He says. How could someone Mike says, how could someone board a plane in that condition? Well, yeah, well that actually relates to what you talked about I think on yesterday's podcast, right, Danny, about the offer up guy that
he wanted you to drive to Santa Monica. Right, Yeah, like just common like yeah, exactly, you would think if you got up and according to the story that this guy said, the guy had has some some work done on his hair and he was supposed to have a bandage, and the bandage like came off and so there was like blood dripping down from the top of his head. He didn't have another bandage to put on his scalp, but he boarded the plane anyway, and it was a
bio hazard. So the people that work on the plane were like, we got to get this guy out of here, so they kicked him off the plane. But yeah, you do question like what do you think. I know that, you know it's not easy. You got the life's tough, but common courtesy like who wants to sit next to some guy with his scalp bleeding because of God only knows what he had done to the top of his head.
It's really gross. It reminds me of the old guys at the gym in the locker room who either aren't self aware, don't care, or see also don't give a shit because of their age and they think they own everything, including the locker room hair dryer on their balls.
Oh yeah, God, that is so. I don't know who the first guy to do that was, but that guy should be taken out. And he's probably dead, but just flogged, just ripped upon. I mean, what are you doing?
Yeah, man, common courtesy for the people around you.
You don't need to shove your nuts into the blower thing in the bathroom. You don't need to do that. And I never ever use those things because of what you just said, Danny, because of what you just said. And I've seen it. I've seen enough. Usually even really old guys or college guys shoved their you're twigging berries in there to dry it all. I don't want any part of that. I'm not gonna put my hands in front of that thing, Are you kidding me? I was
attracted to the giant metal cock. No way. There is another reason we should have paper towels, right, We should have paper towels at these things.
If you had to, you were forced to make that choice. A old wrinkled balls or b the guy's blood scalp on his airport chair.
I guess you gotta go old the old balls. I guess you gotta go that direction. Mike another Mike, Mike and Fullerton. It's all Mike, all the time, Mike and Fullerson says, hey, Ben or Hey, Moneyball Mallard and Danny g I still remember when Ben got that nickname after he broke the record for most three pointers in a game at Saddleback House. Well, thank you for that, Mike, one of the great moments in the history of Juco basketball. Wrong, he says, Ben, Why is it that people only ask
negative questions about your show? Like how mad are you when the crew messes up on a clip or when they are are not paying attention? He says, Why can't they ask more positive questions like how great do you feel after delivering an award winning Mallard monologue? Or about after dominating your personal punching bag Eddie Garcia in a show, Or.
How do you feel after you blast the entire neighborhood with your new high powered hose?
He says. Also, Mike says, speaking and Mike and phos and says, speaking of Eddie, remember to drink plenty of water. That was the big revelation this week on the show, Danny, Eddie revealed that he does not drink water.
You know what he's setting himself up for. What's that stones?
Not the rolling stones though, not.
The rolling stones. He's gonna get kidney stones.
Yeah, so we were shocked by this. We're like, how can you be a middle aged man and not drink water water? A, it's healthy. B. It's gotten no calories. We're all worried about our weight getting fat, and it's got no calories. You can drink as much water as you want, you'll get some water weight, but you can burn that off with the gym on the treadmill. So who cares? And it came up in conversation because one of the great upgrades, the FSR water machine.
You finally that old water tasted like garbage.
I didn't realize how bad the old water was until we got this new I called the Rolls Royce of Water. This thing, oh wonderful. It makes me want to just keep walking over and getting more and more water. It is delicious, there's no aftertaste. It's perfect.
The only bad part is we're all drinking more water there now, but there's only one damn restroom for the men to share.
Yes, there are maybe three women that work in the building and eight hundred men, and there's one women's room and one men's room. So you can do the math on that advantage if you're a woman.
Yeah, where's my bullshit dropped bullshit.
Yeah. Yeah, and they had it the way it should have been, where it's unisex right, first come, first serve. Yeah.
And then there were some filthy animals that work there on the weekend who ruined it for everybody.
Yeah, it's not cool. Not cool. Barry from South Carolina, I writes, and met Barrett that maler meet and greet in Charleston. Wonderful time there. Good to meet Barrett, originally from Nashville, but he's been in Charleston for a bit. He says, Yo, Yo, Ma, Benny and Danny g To answer your question about the food in London from last week. As the saying goes, back in the day, England made all their money off of the spice trade, but they don't use any of them in their food pump. There
you go, rimshot here. But Barry says, I did sample fish and chips at a pub close to Herods. I believe that's what he said. That that store is scary, expensive and unbelievable. He said, have you ever heard of that store? You ever been to London? Have you? No?
No?
Yeah, we look the store up. We have a little music here. I look up this store here Rods. Oh it's a British luxury department store located on Brompton Road in Knightsbridge, London, England. Hmm, three thousand brands, and my guy Berry says, very expensive. Let's see what the prices are here. They got everything. They got home furniture, they got clothing. I'm looking at their website and I don't see I don't see prices here, so oh oh, here
we go, Here we go. Oh wow. You can get like a lamp on the side of your table, you know those lamps, A little whatever lamp, nothing special. Yeah, thirteen hundred dollars thirteen for a lamp and it's not it's just like a regular lamp. You get one at Walmart for like one hundred bucks. Let's see they have Cajmere throw blanket for twelve hundred. Yeah, that's ridiculous. Barry continues the email. He says, I had what they call pie. It's similar to what we would call a pot pie.
They were both good, he said, the fish and chips and the pie. But London is extremely diverse. You can get any type of food there, Thaie, Chinese, Indian, you name it, and they are everywhere, particularly right close to an underground station. There are all types of pubs and restaurants. It is a must see city in my humble opinion. Okay, yeah, I bet you can get some great chicken shwarma in London, right, There's been a lot of migration there. Yeah. I love
chicken sharma by the way. Ah, so good. And some rice that's solid. Anyway, let's see what is next year. It's the actual mailbag. This one.
It just made me hungry. I want that for lunch today, little chicken shwarma.
Yeah, that's good. I have since since we recorded the bumps and the different things for Benny versus the Penny, I have gone back to eating once a day. I went. I talked to Looney about this the other day. I went six days without eating, almost an entire week without eating. What because I was worried about being fat on camera for the show, because that's the only I'm during the
show that I'm seen from head to toe. So I want was like, I gotta lose a lot of weight, even though I didn't really have to lose a lot of weight. Next one is from Gary in Pittsburgh. He says, Hey, Ben, I was listening to another show a few days ago, but only after consuming all three hours of the Real Fifth Hour podcast with You and Danny G. I heard a phrase you use from time to time. They were
talking about this player's salad days. I get the gist of the phrase, but shouldn't it be called their steak days? To me, a salad is the warm up. The steak is the pinnacle or peak of the meal, unless you butterfly and cook it until the shoe leather, as a certain bloviator has been known to do. How dare you? How dare you? Gary? And I want you to know that that high end restaurant in Austin where I got my butterfly cut steak delicious, I gave a chef's kiss
when I ate it. Anyway, he says, do you think this is worthy of a minute's long Mallard investigation? Thank you? Gary? In Pittsburgh, PS make that Columbus Meet and Greet happen. I'll be there with bells on. That's an easy drive from Pittsburgh. Well, we're working on it. We're working on it, Gary, and we'll keep you posted on that. Sometime in twenty twenty five, probably the spring, I would guess the spring of twenty twenty five. I have done a deep dive
though for you. Gary. So this is the phrase of the day, buried in the mailbag, the phrase of the day.
We don't usually get this on Sunday.
Bonus content. It's bonus content, Denny. Phrase to day is, according to GARYT salad days. This actually originated with William Shakespeare. Say what, yeah, the phrase salad days. There's so many
parts of our language that go back to Shakespeare. You probably knew that, Gary, But for the other people listening, for you listening, yeah, William Shakespeare sixteen oh six Anthony and Cleopatra was the play Cleopatra there, and in the play, Cleopatra says, my salad days when I was green in judgment,
cold in blood to say as I said. Then now we are told that Cleopatra is referring to her youthful days with Julius Caesar right back in the in her younger days which he now considers foolish, when she was hanging out with Julius Caesars. I wonder if Julius Caesar knew that his name would be used on a hotel in Vegas. Anyway, the phrase salad days is a metaphor that compares the fresh greenness of a salad the vigor and the recklessness of your youth and all that stuff,
and so that's kind of obviously. The phrase, though, did not become popular, even though it dates back to the sixteen hundreds, it did not become popular until the mid nineteenth century. And now it's used to describe a period of youth and inexperience and innocence in all those things. So salad days. According to Gary, the phrase.
Is all.
The week. So thank you very much. Gary. Appreciate that I did get a rather lengthy my guy Zach sent a long, lengthy emails like you're gonna have to resubmit that. I don't know. We don't have time to get to that at this point, but we will get to it in a future episode. Nick and Wisconsin quickly said, Ben, because you talked about moving on last week's mail bag, I am now curious. Have you put the Moutherard treadmill
back back together yet? I'll take your answer off there. No, Well, it is back together, but it does not work properly. It does not work properly, and it does frustrate me greatly because I bought years ago, actually just before my father passed away. I bought this Jim style treadmill. Like this thing is legit, like the kind you would go into a professional gym. It perfect. I could work out at home. I don't have to go to the gym. And then my father passed away and we had to
move and it got taken apart. They didn't put it aback right, and they we moved and then they put it together. But it doesn't work right. We have to have someone come out and fix it, Nick, And it actually turns out that right now, it's just like every other treadmill. It's got boxes on top of it, and it's a it's a big mess. It's a big hot mess. That's the that's the issue with that, all right, I think we'll end it there again, Zach resubmit. I'm sorry, man,
Zach said, a great story. It's a very long story, and I don't we don't have time to get to it right now. But it's about his his salad days and a very funny story about something that happened at a UH with a with a friend of his involving bodily functions. I guess I'll tease it like that, but Zach resubmit that we'll we'll do it next hopefully next week on the podcast. Remember this Thursday, Benny Versus the Penny returns. That'll be coming up this Thursday. And I'll
be back on the radio tonight tonight. Tonight tonight, we'll be back hanging out and Danny, you'll be with Covino and Rich all week I assume, same time, same station.
Yes, on Monday we'll be in the PM drive slot as normal, but Tuesday and Wednesday we'll be filling in for the great Colin cowherd.
Oh, Colin taking us some time off, um, getting that vacation in.
Yes, some of our superstars are getting into their last vacation days before the NFL season begins.
No days off, no days off once the NFL begins. But yeah, right, people will still take time off. All right. I thank you, Danny. Great weekend, and we'll do it again next weekend. What do you say?
Yeah? Yeah, later, skater gotta murder, I gotta go