The Fifth Hour: "Dust off the Balls" Mail Bag

Kabboobs.

If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the Old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow. The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.

In the air everywhere, The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Mahler and Danny G Radio and a very good Sunday to you. Hanging it out the day in between the championship game tomorrow is the sixth day of April, and we are chilling in the audio box, hanging out in the magic audio Box every single day, every single day. And I think, Danny, we should not waste any time here, my man, Danny G. Let's get right to it.

What do you say?

Yeah, I'm pointing my imaginary squirt gun at you?

How dare you?

It's FSR. Just find me seventy five thousand dollars.

Oh that's right, Yes, I Jamorant, the Great Jamrant, King of all knuckleheads, actually laughed. I at one point I was like, well, this is embarrassing and sad, but then I just thought it was so funny. It's like the Jamaran thing, Danny. I'm sure you guys covered it on Coveno and Rich and all that, but it's like certain people that just they don't they don't get it.

It's like the worst thing in the world or whatever. It was like a finger gun, like we all.

It's it's just like, I love the fact that he threw it right in the face of the NBA hours after this decide we're not gonna plant this jamrant and then he comes out and he's he's going he's got the finger blasters ready to go right in the first quarter.

Just great, just absolutely wonderful. Oh man.

It's like it's like when management back in the day told us not to mention certain things and then just out of nature, naughty by nature, we slipped and talked about it right out the gate, and we're like, whoops. Sometimes it's just something's ingrained in you.

But the thing about jam Moran is he if you read about his issue, like even some of the guys that have been in the media business who former players appointed out like he's not from.

The bad Martin.

No, he's not. The town he grew up in is in the middle of nowhere, you know, so you think he'd be about fishing. And also he had nice middle class parents according to all the stories we've read, so not like he's just some kid from the hood who doesn't know anything else.

Yeah, you know what he reminds me of. He reminds me of kids I grew up with. I grew up in a very nice planned community in Orange County, and there were certain kids at our school that wanted to be like gangsters, you.

Know what I mean. That's the way to do it. Man, I'm gonna be a tough guy.

I blame that movie Dangerous Minds when we were growing up.

That must be it, clearly anyway, So I don't know.

All right, it's let's get to it, Reggie, and Detroit writes, and he says, Hey, Ben and Danny, I love you guys on the weekends. Thanks for answering my email about the postings from Eddie and Lorena.

In the previous show.

I like your Overnight show, but you've been having a lot of commercials lately. It's one read after another. How do you deal with all the commercials? That's from Reggie.

He does understand we're on commercial radio, right, Yeah.

Yes, yeah, we have had a lot more commercial I mean, you remember Danny, we had like there were points we had no commercials on the Overnight Show. I mean it's it's one of those things with Reggie. It is a blessing and a curse. The show is actually doing well. The network's doing well. And yeah, as you reference Danny, that is the most important part. Now, I do take pride whether management likes it or the sales department likes it.

Reads, which I'm fine with. I want them to have more.

Commercials and not less, because that means everything's doing well and people are paying money. They don't give out free commercials. So I like that and it's great and all that, and I try to try to incorporate, you know, different things to make it entertaining.

But Benny, it's free. It's free radio.

Now.

I pay a serious XM subscription every every month. Okay, it's like seventeen dollars.

Now.

There's still a couple of channels, Itune and that's the basic package for them. By the way, and when I tune into a couple of different channels, they still have some live reads and once in a while they'll do some commercials and I'm like, wait a second, I'm paying you. That's my membership fee, so you know what I mean.

But with what we do terrestrial.

Rate, terrestrial radio commercials are what you need to support in order for us to keep doing what we're doing. And that's the important part to remember. I know it's easy to complain about, but you're not paying a monthly fee to hear Ben Maller. You are getting that for free.

And I will quote the retired voice of the New York Yankees on this podcast, the great John Sterling, who popped in here and we should get John on.

A I answer his phone. He's not doing anything, he's retired and all that.

But John Sterling, who said the most important thing is to sell the soap right, and it really we're just filler between the commercials.

Yin Yankee. Yeah that's right.

The Yankees win, and.

And that home run was brought to you by Ivory Soap.

The funniest was the pregame on the Yankees.

Yankee Baseball is brought to you by and then John Sterling would read off and I'm not kidding, like seventeen sponsors in a row and BMW the state area.

It's brought to you by so and so Burger Shack in Manhattan. And I used to watch those infomercials.

I've read books on infomercial I was fascinated by Ron Polpeel. We try to get him on the podcast, and then he died. He was supposed to come on then it didn't work out. But that whole ron Co line, the chopimatic, the diallematic, the vegematic, all that crap, right, the lines set it in and forget it.

But wait, there's more.

Like all that stuff came by via infomercials. Operators are standing by, supplies are limited. All of those phrases started in infomercials.

And they're still around. They're a lot different.

It's not obviously, nothing stays the same, but yeah, anyway, So Reggie Bpt, thank you for listening. You know, I appreciate you listening and complaining about the commercial.

That means they're doing well. Sorry, now the Grandy Man can the Grande Man game?

Yeah, Brandy Man can the Grande Man can?

Oh so much fun? Ohkapa Ton with a home run of.

The Yankees back in the day. All right, let's see what do we have next? Alf from the Courthouse rights in on the mailbag. He says, gentlemen, do you think the reason behind the NFL getting more and more replay happy is motivated by widespread legalized sports betting? And Alf says, just think if you got screwed by a call in the past, do you Veto and his associates would be inclined to hand over? Do you think they would be a handover the winnings. It's not like you're going to

So I have heard this.

Ie was asked the other day in one of the appearances that I made Danny, and they said, what would you change about the NFL, And my point was, I want less replay. I can't stand having to go over every single little thing.

It drives me nuts.

Now, they have been pretty good lately in the NFL about the expedited booth review, you know that, that whole thing, But just in general, I.

Don't like the NBA stoppages when they're trying to look at videotape to see whose finger last touched the basketball, and the flow of the game just absolutely gets ruined. And nine out of ten times it's the way it kind of looked when it happened in real time.

Yeah, no, I agree with you.

And it's like either confirm, you change, you let the call stand, which means you don't know, and so you're just gonna go with whatever it was. And it's like one man's obvious that call must be overturned in the command center, and then other people like watching the same thing, it's like, well that doesn't I mean, it's just let

But now it's like everything has to be right. Do you think it's because of gambling. I don't really think that's why it used to be.

The ball don't lie.

Oh yeah, maybe the AI can lie, but not the ball. But I thank you Alf as far as the I just point out, though I know, legally speaking, the legal ease in the agreements that the sports leagues have a lot of them are classified as entertainment operations. So they do that for multiple reasons. But in a court environment, I think they'd be okay.

I don't.

I don't think they're too worried about the legal part of it. They have all that stuff vetted by a million attorneys. Next up Kyrie in okayc on the mailbag. He says, Hey, Ben and Danny, thank you Ben for shouting me out again on the radio. You make me feel like the official thunder fan of the militia.

You're a man of the people and that's some very nice things here. Call me absolute goat.

What are you doing a wacky morning zoo show. You're not supposed to do shout outs. That's a podcast. We're allowed to do a podcast. And he says, what did you say? Here, I thought, I check in with you guys. I really think my Thunder have a chance to win the finals. I know you agree with me. Ha ha haa some.

Emojis there you don't.

But anyways, I am listening to the podcast seven days a week.

Is Kyrie there you go? Well, thank you, Kyrie. And the reason I.

Bring your name up is because you're the only Oklahoma City Thunder fan I've ever come across.

You're the only one. Oh that isn't funny.

I know, Geene, but I had not heard from Kyrie in a while. So when I don't hear from some of you guys, I'm like, are they still listening? Are they still there? What happened? Did something change in their life?

Yeah, or they pass away? Unfortunately?

Oh yeah, well wait, we kind of got maybe we.

Have, so I went out rip bear drinking Brian.

One of a kind, beer drinking Brian is tractor And then if we can.

Only get a hold Do you sometimes think of listeners like that in the great moments we've missed out on since they passed.

Oh yeah, like Genie and Medford during the pandemic would have been amazing. Jimmy Ray from Tampa Bay a beer drinking Brian.

Like these are great callers. It was wonderful.

Anytime I do an Insta trivia or the who am I game? I think I'm Matt in the Bay Area.

Yeah.

Now, he always would check me. He had most of the answers to those questions. It would piss me off so much. And mass whole Mickey was such a great supporter of the show. He passed away last year. Calligan, Tim and Michigan and these guys, I think, Yeah, these guys were great friends of the show. And they were just fun people for us to you know, characters and foils or whatever. So yeah, and you wonder it's a lot of these guys checked out way too soon too.

That's the other thing.

Please take care of your own health.

Yeah, try not to try not to leave too too early. Next up is Todd in Minnesota. He writes, Sin says, they've been in any enjoy podcasts. Well, I'm taking care of my honeydee list on the weekends. He's I thought this was right in your wheelhouse bed. Rob Gronkowski this week said that he had a request of NFL coaches.

He said, we need them to get fat again. He's a winner.

Then I know you'll agree. Who's your favorite fat NFL coach of all time?

So it's hard to whittle it down, Todd. I Oh, I ask Danny too his favorite fatty? I guess Gronk, according to Todd, was complaining the coaches are in shape. That is true.

A lot of the NFL coaches are in shape other than Andy Reid. Is there any other fat coach other.

Than Nandy Reid?

You know what this is kind of like how certain comedians shed a lot of weight and suddenly they're skinny and they're not funny anymore. Yes, that's a phenomenon that has happened over the years. There's a lot of there's even some actresses who have said that, well, once I got skinny, you know, some people looked at me a lot different, and I wasn't as funny to them anymore. It's like that was a big part of their stick, and so when they shed the weight, everything changes.

Yeah, so zempic is not good. A lot of these coaches are younger. Though we were younger, Danny and we were kids. It was like a lot older middle age.

I think your boy Sean McVay started a lot of this.

Yeah, mcvad blame McVeigh. That's that's that's right, that's not wrong.

The greatest fact coach of all time, the greatest photo of all time, I think you'll agree, is Mark Mangino. Yeah, Mark Mangino is not an NFL coach. He was coaching at Kansas.

Yeah, I know what you're talking about. The photo before the Yeah, there's also famous Walris. There's also a famous Walris photo of Mike Homgren Mike Holman.

Yeah, a good one too. But Mark Mangino standing with the Orange Bowl mascot, and uh, just you know, I have his number. Actually I could probably after saying this, he probably won't come on the podcast, but yeah, I probly track down Mangino. I have his number. Rex Ryan was a good fat coach. He actually was fun. He was three fifty or something like that when he was there. And yeah, we only had one. We had Mike McCarthy was a fat coach.

But he's not in the NFL anymore.

He's out does Art shell count. He had a big belly.

Yeah, he was fat. Art was fat. Absolutely. Romeo Cornell was fat. Remember Romeo Crenell.

Yeah, that's right, he was coaching the brown Wow, you you're good on this topic. I just googled it and your boy, man Gino comes up first on the list.

Oh yeah, man Gino.

Here and here's the rest of the list. Okay, Andy Reid, you mentioned Charlie Weiss. Oh yeah, I forgot about Charlie rob Ryan, Dennis rob Ryan. Rob Ryan worked at our place, remember pregnant? Yes, you mentioned Romeo Crenell. Tom Cable is on the list. Oh I forgot Tom Cable.

Yeah, Seattle, right, Seattle.

Famous for coaching big ugly Yeah. And Wade Phillips is on the list. Oh yeah, Wade, good old Wade don't do list podcasting. So that's a big board right there.

That is a big board as not a list.

That is it's a really big fat board.

H It's a a larger in chargeboard. Larger in chargeboard for sure. Yeah, all right, well thank you for that. That's a great reminiscing about fat coaches. And if you're able to see, obviously you're blind, you can't look this up, but check out the photo of Mangino with the orange.

Here.

The photo just popped up.

All right.

Next up on the membi, Kevin and Kansas rights in says ay Ben and Danny GM. Sitting in the Wichita Airport listening to the Ben Maller Show, the Thursday Night Podcast.

I got out of the car at.

Departures, made my way through tsa preach, got a Duncan coffee, all in four minutes. As frequent flyers, have you been able to streamline your travels? I'm looking forward to listening to your podcast from Fargo all this week.

Well, thank you, Kevin. At that trip, You're going from Wichita to Fargo. Man, what you're doing in Fargo? Kevin? You have family there? Does anyone go to Fargo just on vacation? I don't know. It's like is it like Cleveland?

I'm going to Fargo. Actually met at the Mallard meet and greet in Minnesota, met some listeners to the show from Fargo. If I one of the guys there used to live in San Diego and moved to Fargo, and I told him, I said, you're the only guy in the history of the world that went from San Diego to Fargo. There's been a lot of people to go from Fargo to San Diego, but you're the only one

But at LAX you have no chance.

No, you have no chance. The only thing that might be in your favor is if you sign up and pay extra for the TSA pre check. That's always a good thing to do if you're a regular traveler. And also you can pay a little extra to board first, or you can just sit there in the queue on your phone like we do for Southwest. As soon as it's twenty four hours before your flight, you hit the button and it puts you like at B twenty or whatever, so that you can get on the plane before all the other animals.

Well, now Southwest, have they switched over to seating?

It's coming up soon here?

Yeah?

Yeah, and they're charging for bags all bags? Now what a bummer?

Yeah, the last one. We should start an airline where you actually treat people with.

Respect and all that and give them deals and yeah, that would never work.

What else do we have?

Mike, and Fullerton writes and says happy April, Ben and Danny g and Mike says, Ben, you recently mentioned having a great Harry Carey story, but I don't believe you ever got around.

To telling it. Could you please tell it now? He says, ps.

I love how you always make fun of that fermog guy and the live reads.

It's my favorite part of the show. See there you go, Mike.

Unlike Reggie who was complaining about all the commercials, you are embracing the fact that I work your name in.

I'm sure, I'm sure you love that your name.

As far as the Harry Carey Store, I've told this a few times over the years, but we always have new people.

Coming into the store.

So if you knew to the store, Harry Carey wasn't over the top play by play guy from a different generation and just quite the cartoon character Old drunk Guy, a classes total homer for the Chicago cub Holy Cow and just boozing and crew.

Then the whole thing.

Remember when Bill Murray impersonated him.

Oh oh yeah, welcome to Ghostbusters nine. How fun out there and be safe? That's great, that is awesome. Yeah. So it's years ago at Dodgers dat.

At the end of Harry Carey's career as a Cup broadcaster, I started working in the media, and so the last probably six or seven years Harry Carey was a broadcaster for the Cubs.

I was in the media, and back in those days.

The Dodgers were a family run operation, and I had access and did some.

Work out there.

And Harry did not do most of the Cub road games he'd gotten to, but he always came to La because he loved Palm Springs. Harry would spend the winter in Palm Springs, had a place out there in Palm Springs, as.

I remember it, and so we always did the Dodger games.

That was the only road games he would guarant I think the Padres also, but the Southern California games and then you go back to Palm Spring. So the stars aligned one afternoon at Dodger Stadium, and I show up I park, I go in. Back in those days, we all went in the same entrance, So I go in there, and you go up at a higher level of Dodgers datum, you actually have to take elevators down into the bowels.

Of Chavez Ravine.

So part to the top, go down to the elevator, waiting for the elevator. And to my right, I hear this sound of this kind of older gentleman saying something, and and I noticed in my peripheral vision I could see the glasses, because this guy had unbelievable glasses. And sure enough, it was Harry Carey, the play by play voice of the Cups, had arrived at the ballpark with his driver. I guess he couldn't drive anymore. So we had a driver and we had to get in the elevator.

So it was me, Harry Carey, his.

Driver, and then there were two other people that worked at the stadium that were there.

So we get into the elevator.

And at Dodgers Stadium, I'm pretty sure they still have this. They had elevator operators. In the elevator, they have someone that has to press the button.

I guess, yeah, I've seen that they still have that at the Colorado Rocky Stadium the Colorado.

Right, So the Dodgers had an elevator operator. Fine, so we all get in there. We get herded into the elevator, and the elevator operator was this very good looking Latino woman. Uh, just smoking hot, right, smoke show. And as the elevator is going down, Harry Carey starts flirting with the elevator operator.

How you doing, young lady. It was it was funny because we don't blurted today.

His game is being brought to you by Bluetoe. Uh.

But it was just hilarious because Harry, like I could tell what he was doing, like he thought he was. You know, everyone was like, well, she's a beautiful woman whatever, and he started like trying to I don't want to say he's picking up on her, but it seemed like he was.

He was kind of like flirting. It was really funny.

He was getting he was getting his daddy mac on.

Yeah, yeah, no, it was.

It was hilarious because I had grown up watching the Cubs.

Games with Harry Carey. You know when we were.

Kids, right, we had braves games, Cubs games, and the local teams. And so I watched a lot of Braves games, a lot of Cubs games on the superstations back in the stone, before the Internet. And so here's someone that I grew up watching on TV and he's just, you know, he's really old and he's just trying his best to kind of dazzle.

This, uh, this young lady. It was. It was pretty funny. So that's my my Harry Carey.

Story Berry in South Carolina rights and says, yo yo, ma, Benny and Danny g a question for you. Do you wear socks to bed or not? I bet Lorena wears socks. Well, Lorena is not here, I am. I'm antized. I don't wear socks.

Yeah, now now that he mentioned that Lorena's gonna get six pairs of socks in the mail, Yeah.

Lorena got upset this week because this guy, Spaccoli, who's a big fan of the show.

I great dude, loves Spaccoli and uh.

In cool cool guy lives in He's from Wisconsin, but he lives in North Carolina and he's been out to visit us, and so Spaccoli sent me up nice box with some great items from from BUCkies. It's kind of an early birthday president. It was very kind of him to do that. He didn't have to do that. It was very kind of him. So I show up the work and Loraina is like, there's a box with your name on it.

Do you want me to open it?

You know, she's so used to opening boxes now she's she's at the point she's like, you just assume it must be I'm the expert box opener.

She's like one of those YouTubers who just does unboxings all the time.

Oh man, I think with all the things that she's got in the mail, she's making more than I am now, Danny in terms of product. Definitely, it's unreal good for her. But yeah, I don't wear socks. I mean you probably don't care.

But wait till all the listeners see this stuff on her eBay account.

Yeah, she's gonna gonna make fight the money there.

Yeah, she's got a ton of inventory.

Yeah Ove all right, Dave writes in hey Ben, just so.

You know, I've been working on my chest too with my my weight bench in my garage. So if you want to see some chest, send me, send me some goodies in the mail.

That's funny.

Uh.

Anyway, Dave rights in. He said, I don't know where Davy. Dumb asses don't say where you're from, some of you morons. Anyway, Dave rights and says, hey, Ben, Danny gotta know if you guys would try this or not. Kentucky Fried Chicken KFC has debuted finger licking toothpaste, and it tastes just like chicken.

Uh.

The original recipe chicken, would you brush your teeth with it? So the question, Dave is would you brush your teeth? But really is how old you are? Because I gotta tell you, Danny, if I was six or seven or eight year old.

Benny, I'm in. I'm in. I mean, I'm going.

Yeah, I want I want the full chicken taste all over my teeth at this age I'm at now, Probably not. I might try it now your your son, Danny co Yeah, you might want to. I don't even you can buy this still, But the KFC finger licking toothpaste?

All right, I want my chicken. Oh that's a classic.

Yeah, I haven't heard that drop in a long time.

All Right, I want my chicken.

Wow, that's funny. Yeah, we don't hear a lot of those those classic drops. That's the problem. We change engineers. They don't know the old drops.

They don't.

Yeah, you'd hear the classic drops on this podcast every weekend.

Yeah, some of the greats.

Man.

I love those old drops back back in the day, and you guys would always take stuff out of context, which is I think the funniest.

I think we should still do that.

We don't really do that much anymore on the Overnight Show, but out of context audio is hilarious or.

With you, it's just you talking as you normally do.

I rotate nuts.

Well, no, no, I mean occasionally, as you know, Danny, I like to add a little spice. I am the dancing clown and I like to act like the dancing clown, and you know, throw a little extra fun on top, and then sometimes it doesn't come off very well. I'm not gonna lie, Danny. That was a big cock. Remember the Tom Tom Brady Patriot deflated ball story. Uh, there were so many drops that came out of that period of time because you're talking about balls.

Yeah, remember the ball Remember the ball song we used to play.

I yes, I haven't heard that in a long time. That was that was outstanding.

Some guys like a round, and some guys like him dance, some guys like a doll.

To me, those balls are all perfect.

Oh that's so good. That was fun. I love stories like that, aren't they great?

Those kind of scandals where it's like every day there's a new revelation and then and just awesome.

You don't want watery balls? All right, we'll get out on that, Danny.

I will be back tonight in the Magic Radio Box, a brand new week of gas Baggerye.

And we'll see what the week holds here.

And sure they'll get closer to the NFL Draft, more trades and rumors and all that stuff. And you're back tomorrow with Covino and Rich. I assume normal week for you, Danny.

Yes, sir, normal week. That is five to seven pm on the east side of the country, and on the west side that's two to four pm in beautiful Sacramento, California, where the press conferences are being held in a shed.

Yes, major league Baseball salaries, minor league baseball facilities.

They said that that stadium.

I love to say, so, well, if the made the playoffs while they're in Sacramento, they wouldn't be able to host a playoff game, they'd have to play somewhere else. The stadium would not be able to have room. It's not made for like the amount.

Of Yeah, yeah, it's not their fault. People need to remember it's temporary. They did do some upgrades, so they were trying to make it at least as close to MLB ready as possible.

Yeah, and the only reason they're even there.

Otherwise they would have gone to Reno or somewhere Nevada to play games.

They would have gone to the minor League Stateium in Vegas. But the reason they.

Had to stay is because they have a TV contract with NBC Sports Bay Area that's paying them a ton of money. And so they if they had left California, they would have lost or left Northern California.

Think revenue.

I I didn't know that we'd learned something new. And by the way, to backtrack a little bit, the Southwest change starts on May twenty eighth.

Boo, you'll be able to tell your son called bucket your day when you were a little baby, had this.

Airline and you didn't have seats.

Your free bags, Dad, free bags? Yeah, then you have free bags, all right? All right, have a great rest of your Sunday, and thanks for listening.

I do appreciate it. And send a mail. Send a letter and make sure you put next week for the mail bag. Make sure you put your name in there.

Ben Real fifth so many email address Real fifth hour at gmail dot com, Real fifth hour at gmail dot com.

So we'll talk to you then later.

Skater gotta murder, I gotta go,