The Fifth Hour: Bad Fortune, the Upsell

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If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to Clearinghouse of hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.

In the air everywhere, The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Malor and Danny g Radio. And we've made it to the end of the road, which is the start of another road. The road does not end, The audio road does not end. It is the weekend, the kickoff of the Fifth Hour podcast, the vintage of the first weekend in the month of April.

Here we are, We've made it to the fourth month of the year.

We are just a little pimple on an elephant's ass. There are like thirty something thousand podcasts at iHeart, but somehow the Fifth Hour podcast actually does pretty well, much better than the vast majority. And we actually have people listen to this podcast. Don't tell anyone because then they won't listen. But here we are on the fourth day of April a very interesting day in the history of

So there you go on this podcast.

What you have tuned into for some reason, we have not good fortune, but bad fortune. We've got the phrase of the week, some foody fun as well, and whatever else pops up. I did want to mention while I'm talking about events and today's the day, and these things have happened. It is also National Picky Eater's Day, and

What exactly this day is for now.

Supposedly, the origins of National Picky Eater's Day is a day that is not about celebrating not eating certain foods. It is actually a day to try to get your kids, because normally it's the kids you're trying to get to eat healthy and all that stuff. So it's a day to celebrate these small victories in life. And a recent survey found that at most meal time issues with food. The coniption fit happens because your kid doesn't want to

I like what I like, and that's it.

And the first ever picky eater probably goes back I don't know, the prehistoric times and all that, and I can imagine that the kid didn't want to eat berries, and it's like, I like the meat I'm eating, I don't eat berries, And that was it. Picky eater actually first became a thing, you know, I like words. We have the phrase of the week. We'll get too later

Discussion, and it started that year.

By the nineteen sixties and seventies, fussy eating was widespread and it made Doctor Seuss's Green Eggs and Ham a best seller, and that because the people could not get their kids to eat.

I guess there was.

It must have been a boom in the sixties in different foods and the frozen food thing, and that kind of took off in that time, and one thing led to another. There's actually been a bunch of studies that have been done in all this.

They say that.

Fifty nine percent of kids are picky eaters. It's more likely that your kid is not going to like what you're serving, and there's a negotiation.

It's like a hostage situation.

And my dear old mom she still be resting in peace, but man, I put my mom through the wringer. She would serve always what she was taught, a balance meal, protein like a meat or a fish or chicken, and then we'd have like a starch of potato, but we'd always have vegetables. My mom eat a lot of peas, a lot of peas, and I did not like peas. Sam I am and Mom I am, and I wouldn't

And she's like, you're not leaving the.

Table, Benjamin until you eat those vegetables. And I'm like, all right, I'm not going anywhere. I'll sit right here. I got nothing to do, and and we just kind of try to negotiate my mom withou. Then we'll just eat a little bit, try something, you know, just kind

But anyway, my mom will be like, all right, so why don't I.

We mix the vegetables with the pasta and you will'n't even be able to taste it, and you'll be all about it, and yeah, I'm not doing that.

I don't like the color green.

I'm good, that's it. So anyway, Happy National Picky Eater's Day. Flipping the page on that I fell down a rabbit hole recently, and I'd like to share it with the class. And since you're a member of the class and you're still listening to this podcast, some I don't know eight nine, ten minutes in whatever it is, I'm not keeping track.

So not good fortune, but bad fortune.

And I actually want to thank a listener who sent me down this rabbit hole. Checking my email. You know, I'm very bad about writing back and all that. Some of you are very persistent and continue to pester me. And I got an email from a guy that lives in Florida, Mike, who is I think in the Orlando area. I could be completely long the town he mentioned.

And I don't remember it right now.

I don't have it in front of me, believe I. When I was in Florida for spring training with the Dodgers years ago, I think I drove through that town and I'm pretty sure it's on the path between Orlando and verro Beach, but I might be wrong.

It could be God only knows.

He could be out near Jed who fled out there in the northern part.

Anyway, So not good fortune, but bad fortune.

And this was about he hand some questions about fortune Telly telling he had fallen. He had sent me a story and he was, I guess he had had a friend who had fallen for a scam involving fortune tellers.

And he listens to the show and he he knows some of my shtick that I say on the.

Air, and I'll say I'm a distant relative of Nostradamus and friend of Nostradini's.

It's one of my lines.

And so he sent me this story and he said, I had a friend that fell for this, and I want you to, you know, to read read this. And then I clicked on it and I read it, and then I started reading more and I actually wrote back, I said, listen, I hope you understand that that is as I said here stick and it's just a gag. I know there is no such thing as as accurate fortune telling. I am aware of it, and I do it kind of in a mocking way. And I hope

Good or without a doubt.

I've incorporated this nonsense into the to the mount of monologues and the different eight ball sayings, different phrases. There was a I use the Zoltar machine from there was this movie I saw when I was a kid. I was younger Tom Hanks movie. He grew up and he became it was a grown ass man and it was.

The machine that gave him the wish.

And I've quoted Karnak the Magnificent, which is from the old Tonight Show, dating myself also. So I've done all these nonsense things over the years, really mocking the world of fortune telling and someway. This guy sent me some information and then I started digging and I wanted to share my notes with the class. Think of it as a mallor webinar if you will. It is on the web,

However, so every where.

I've gone, whether it's Pittsburgh, Boston, Syracuse, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Florida, Ohio, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, everywhere I go, I see the fortune teller shop, and they're normally in a pretty decent mall or you know, one of those like we you have the grocery store, you've got the barber shop, and then you've got a little spot that is a psychic fortune teller. And it's one of those things. It's like how do they afford that?

How do they put off?

Anyway, So I started starting reading what the gentleman from Florida sent me, and then I started doing some other stuff and the fortune telling, tarroot reading, palm reading.

All that is valued.

At two point three billion with a B like ben two point three billion in the United States, and it is estimated this blooming away that across the United States there are one hundred and five thousand, over one hundred and five thousand businesses that are in that industry, and the annual growth rate is around four point three percent, and then they estimate the business is booming for a lot during COVID, people just worked up and needing help and looking anywhere they could.

Get it pandemic.

Certainly, it's gone down a little bit since the pandemic, but it's continued overall to go up.

And then you start digging.

A little deeper and you're like, all right, so what's going on? And so the way the scams work, the fortune telling scams, is they're able to exploit people who are curious, people that are at an emotionally weak spot in their life. Essentially, we use the phrase also on the show getting that Dumb Money, which is a Wall Street phrase, but in fortune telling, I don't know if dumb is the right word, because I don't want to

At certain points in your life.

They just do right, whether you lose someone close to you, whether you've got a medical problem, maybe you lose your job. There's certain points in our life where we do not have the defense up the force field. The protection goes away. And the way that the fortune telling industry gets customers, I guess they call it the hook, right, the hook, And how do you get people. It's like doing a radio show. Well, a lot of the times in the old days, you just get people that would scan the

But the fortune telling.

Industry, they'll post ads on street signs and online and social media and all that, and they'll offer the tarot readings and all the different things and all that stuff, and they promised they'll give you information.

The cold reading thing is.

I remember there was a guy, James Randy. He died a couple of years ago, The Amazing Randy. And there was a pretty good documentary. Some of it was annoying in the documentary, but most of it was pretty good.

The Amazing Randy. It was recorded near the end of his life.

About the parts I liked were the parts about how he tried to expose and he did expose many people in this industry. And he had like a if I remember correctly, and I haven't seen the documentary in a number of years, and I think I recommended it on this podcast. But anyway, the Amazing Randy, he had a standing offer.

James Randy.

He was a magician, and he used to bother him that people who were magicians would exploit the fact they thought they would teach people that this was real. And he's like, well, it's not real, it's magic. We're doing a show, we're doing performance art, and it's all right. Anyway, So James Randy had a Amazing Randy had an offer a million dollars if you could go into a room under his conditions, with limited guidelines and prove prove that you could actually tell the future.

Million dollars.

And despite one hundred thousand businesses offering services about predicting the future, sure nobody, uh, nobody got it right. Nobody took the offer. Well, I don't know nobody took the office. I think one one or two people tried, but they didn't succeed in that. And so the cold reading thing is and I think this was also in the documentary.

It's a lot of guess work.

It's a lot of vague phrases that could apply to anyone. Like I see someone in your in your life that their name starts with the first name starts with an M. I see you you've had something that hasn't gone your way recently in your life, which is one of those things like you going to a cold reading. Chances are you're going there because something didn't go great, you know, and you know someone in your world is hiding something from you, and I see it's a woman, and you know, and.

Just you, just you, And then they answer.

And a lot of times the person that is having the cold reading done to them will answer these questions and give more information right, and they'll read.

Body language, and they'll.

They'll kind of refine and update predictions and things as they go through the whole thing. And then eventually they if they're good at it, they'll gain your trust. And once they've got you, they got you by the balls, all right, they got you by it right, because then they introduce a different issue, right. And oftentimes, from what I've been able to discover from my rabbit hole, you can go down your own rabbit hole is they will.

Some kind of spiritual block get to the other.

Side, and they come up with all these terms and they claim that the issue is what's really causing your problems in life, that the reason you have a really shitty job and you're in a in no relationship other than with your right hand is because of this blockage or bad energy And then at that point's the pivot or the upsell. At that point, suddenly the very affordable visit to the fortune teller gets a lot more expensive because they get you by a little you know, maybe

Goes a little deeper. It's going to take more work.

I need to spend more time with you, and I have a bunch of rituals and I have a Harry Potter spell book, and we need to cleanse this out of you.

And all of a sudden they start upselling right and then you're it goes.

From fifty bucks for a one time fee, and it's one hundred and fifty dollars, and it's and then it keeps getting worse.

It's like, I didn't think it was this bad.

And then it's you know it's gonna I'm gonna need more candles and crystals and all the other bullshoi and all that, and and if you don't play along, they then give you a they give.

You a guilt trip. They're like, wait a minute, you don't believe you know, and they they'll warn you.

They'll be like, oh man, if you don't do this, not only are you going to have issues, but people around you are going to the bad mojo is going to go to them.

And but if you do it, you know it won't happen. And then there's other times.

They'll be like, hey, wait a minute, you know your significant other will will come back or will find them or whatever. And so they essentially just take advantage of people that are at a week spot. Like I said, not necessarily dumb people. In fact, there's some very very successful, highly educated people. And it's like people in academia who you'd think would know better, and they fall for And I've had some friends that are magicians over the years and.

They've told me. It's like, it's amazing.

It's like people that you would think would never ever go down this road and believe it, believe it.

And it's the power of.

The illusion that the magicians have found certain blind spots that we all have, and often they're right in front of us that we're not paying attention to, and they've been able to take it.

But as far as the fortune teller thing.

They get you in cheap, they give you vague answers, they manipulate you, they build their trust, the trust between the client and the person, and then it's.

Off to the races, right, it's off to the races.

And the online scams are popular now. Back in the old days they had infomercials, the Miss Cleo one the most famous.

These are traveling traveling.

Gypsies, right going around and doing their thing, and then they eventually will disappear at some point, go on to the next city and try to do it all over again, right, try to do it all over again, and it's very effective, works a lot, works a lot, Otherwise there wouldn't be so many people doing it now. Every once in a while, somebody in the government tries to step.

In and say, well, wait a minute.

And what they'll often do is they they've actually partner with lawyers and they'll use these psychological tricks and all that, but they'll seem authentic, but they operate on the margins, on the fringes where they'll sell it in the fine print as for entertainment purposes only for entertainment purposes only.

And when you.

Toss that phrase in, it makes it, from a legal standpoint, very difficult to charge someone with a crime because they say, well,

So the phrase.

Nitty gritty originated in the African American communities, and they claim the roots of it likely came from like the slavery era in American history, and they the debate is like, where did it exactly come from?

Is it linked to.

The word nits, the eggs of lice and grits?

Is that what it is? They're not sure about that.

But where the word really took off was in New Orleans in jazz jazz music, and the term started really going for it in the nineteen fifties, Like the mid twentieth century, nineteen fifties and nineteen sixties, it would pop up in by then music literature.

People just use it.

And but again it mostly started going mainstream because of jazz and blues in New Orleans, and for people who were doing jazz and blues in New Orleans at that time, it meant the most important part of the song. You got through all the fluff and you got down to the part of the song which was the most important part. And in nineteen sixty three it really went mainstream because there was a song.

Surely Ellis released her song The Nitty Gritty.

And that put it firmly in the pop culture.

And there you go. Now there's also a theory.

That nitty gritty didn't you know, didn't come from slavery times.

It was in the jazz and blues world and that's where it took off.

But it's really just a way to kind of mix words together, kind of like hocus Pocus or helter skelter. You put nitty gritty in there, and the people that study words, the linguist people claim it is a classic trick that the English language and those that speak it love, where you repeat sounds and it gives a phrase some wow like razmataz, right, Rasmataz.

Things like that it works out well, works out well.

So there it is the phrase of the week, nitty gritty, which the early origin.

Is up in debate. Was it from the slave times of the Southern States.

It did start becoming mainstream because of New Orleans jazz and blues and all that, but we're exactly it recently became a thing. That's the great, great unknown. Time out for some foody fun. Hooray for food e fun. That's right, foody foody fun.

Well, if you like Krispy Kreme, good news, they have a new donut, not a diet donut. It's the Fruity Pebbles donut.

It became available yesterday and it is available through the weekend. So if you this sounds like something that only a kid would like, but who knows, maybe you got kids, maybe you like it yourself. But as it is described, it is just a donut covered in fruity pebbles, so.

Sugar sugar on sugar.

Popeyes offering any two chicken sandwiches and a regular side for twelve dollars.

It seems like a pretty good deal.

Of course, only available through the app, available through April thirteenth, so.

You got a little bit of time on that a little time ago. What other specials are there?

I think Applebee still has the two for twenty five dollars menu deal. They've got the two new sizzling skillet and steak deal for a limited time, so you can get that. What else do we have about? Popeyes launched a new pickle glaze chicken sandwich that makes me want to puke in my mouth. Fried pickles and pickle lemonade go out right now, alf the alien O Pinter, you shmuck and your love of pickles?

How dare you? How dare you? Well?

Pizza Hu Pizza Taiwan their latest pizza.

How do I describe this? It looks like a turtle with a snake on its back, and you grab that. Crumble. I love Crumble.

If they didn't cost seven hundred dollars for a cookie, I'd eat there more. Crumble makes a new strawberry butter cake through April fifth, So you got today and tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.

Yeah, there you go. There was also a story that made the rounds. I think this was like an April Fools joke that Chipotle.

Was not doing well. They were going to file for bankruptcy and they were going to get.

Rid of all of their stores. Apparently that was bullshoy, not true, not true, wrong wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong wrong. What else do we have?

Taco Bell has introduced a new Caliente Cantina Chicken nacho fries deal, which it looks all right.

I don't know that. It's like the greatest thing in the world.

It's got slow roasted chicken, nacho cheese, sauce, shredded cheddar cheese, crunchy Fiesta strips.

Sour cream.

Don't need that in Caliente sauce. It's five hundred and forty calories for your side dish.

And anyway there it is all right. We'll get out on that.

Danny g should be with me tomorrow on the Saturday part, the Final four Tomorrow. I got the Dodgers and the Phillies. Today, I'll be checking that out from the City of Brotherly Love. Hope believe Fats will be out there. So we'll be checking out the Dodgers and the Fills. And I think that's really all I'll be checking out. Who knows, you'll find out. I'll tell you tomorrow. All right, have a

No numbers, Real fifth Hour.

At gmail dot com. I have a wonderful rest of your day and we'll talk to you tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow later. Skater austa pasta.

Uh yeah, that's not quite how I say it. All right, that's all. Danny got a murder.

I gotta go.