The Fifth Hour: "Ass Bite Karma" Mail Bag

The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller and my man Danny g Radio bloviating eight days a week, no days off. We do not believe in load management. What is still wrong with the clippers? We do not because four hours a night for me not enough. And of course Danny part of the Covino and Rich Show Monday through Friday,

very popular show on Fox Sports Radio. But we are here as a public service to you, the consumer of audio content, and we are powered by the vast i heeart influence, the reach of iHeart, a major media company, and we are heard everywhere on the iHeartRadio app and anywhere you get podcasts. You can support this show many many ways. We thank you for doing it. Right now, I am on all the social media channels. You can follow me on their Twitter at Ben Maller Facebook, Ben

Mallers Show. We use that a lot for this podcast, and on Instagram where you learned yesterday. I'm an influencer for women's glasses. Benn Maller on Fox, Ben Maller on Fox, and Danny you're on all those fine things, not on TikTok. We're not on TikTok. Yeah. I got the same handle on all those socials at Danny G Radio. And I heard mail mother Sucker that we got a lot of questions this weekend. You got a good amount, So let's get right to it. Strike up my man, o hi

o Wow. It's first up on the mail bag. We go to Kevin in Kansas, a big supporter of this podcast. Kevin says, Dear Ben and Danny Gee in western Kansas, we are no stranger to weird, wacky winter weather. With your recent bout of winter weather there, it doesn't usually happen. I've been eager to hear both of your takes on how things went. Did people rush to buy bread and milk? Did people drive more crazily? How has work? How was work impacted? Inquiring minds would like to know, thank you.

That's from Kevin. Well, you told a great story yesterday about your your your dad Danny, right and then the nonsense. And he's a little north of where we are. Yeah, but yeah, people drive crazy. There's a lot of people. There's a lot of people that slow down, but there's always that one asshole that still thinks he's on the Autobahn and and doesn't mind the snow and just drives crazy. I haven't noticed people around where I am rushing to

buy supplies. I guess out in the mountain communities where they really got hit though it's nasty, like in Big Bear, which is a big mountain snow resort in the in the LA area, they got it really bad and like people were stuck up there also for a long time with no supplies. So did you notice anything, Danny specifically to answer Kevin's question, No, I guess if we would

have had our power out. Our power flickered a few times when the rain was coming down really bad, when it was hailing outside, and at that point my wife you said, oh, maybe we should go get some supplies. Yeah, which I think is a little too late. When it starts to flicker. I'm not an expert. But I think once it starts to flicker, that's usually not a good sign. That's usually not something's going well there. But what do I know? Well, I know all right, Thank you Kevin.

We have Ozzy Wise from Western Australia. Next up on the mailback. He says, Hey, my mates Benny and Benny the Bopper and Daddy G Radio straight to the point this week, I am doing service on my car this week when the gear finally arrives, as it will be less than half price to do it myself than to take it to the mechanic. Have either of you thought about doing it yourself to save costs or as you both have newish cars, do you have to take it to a certified mechanic? Looking at you, Ben, and it's

a lot simpler than people think. And he says also, let's have a roll call on daddy nicknames. So Ozzy was how many nicknames do you have? Daddy G? Daddy? We know the daddy G, Dandy G, Danny Garrettelli, the microphone throttler, oh, the microphone throwther Le's correct. So to answer, ozzywas question in my head? I fix everything via YouTube. I go on and you know, you go on YouTube and within three and a half five minutes, any problem

is fixed. But I recall when I was getting the new mallarable bile the guy at the dealership, and maybe he was full of shit, and we have people that work in the car business that can help us out, but this guy was. He was telling us. He's like, well, you know, need to get the warranty because the way they designed these new cars, with all the technology, it's very tough for someone who's not a trained, certified mechanic to actually fix these cars. And they do that intentionally.

It's great for the car business because this stuff doesn't last that long because it's technology and you have to use one of their mechanics to fix the stuff. And I looked at that, and then I got in the car and I looked at all the cameras that pop up when you turn right or turn left, and I looked at this, that and the other thing. I said, you know what, that's probably right, Like it's one thing to fix a nineteen fifty seven Chevy or something along

those lines, but these new cars. Danny, Yeah, I don't know how on a YouTube video you can figure out like what connects to the camera, which goes to the battery. But you've got to have a certain chip to make it all work. But I've thought about doing it. But what about you, Danny. Now you have to worry about the electronics nowadays just as much as the actual motor.

And to your point, when you go nowadays to Costco or best Buy a place like that, and you buy a seventy inch television, well they don't may come the way they used to. That's why you can get a TV now. Remember those TVs when they first came out, how much were they thousands of dollars? For sure? They were saying, yeah, now they're hundreds of dollars, but they're flimsier. And I remember the guy at best Buy telling me, hey, with electronics nowadays, everything's cheaper, but make sure you get

the warranty. Imagine those selling a product and saying, well, as we understand it, you should enjoy the product, but it's not gonna last you got it. And I always thought that was just bullshit. And when they try to sell you the warranty or the extended care package, I've I've always been of the mind that's just the way they make a lot of money because most people don't

actually use those warranties. It's kind of like, I read a book about infomercials because I'm a loser, and I used to love late night infomercials when I was growing up, and they talked about the lifetime warranty that a lot of these products would would put on. You'd watch a late night infomercial. It's like, you don't buy this workout equipment lifetime warranty, if anything breaks, send it back. We'll

send you another one. And they said the reason they did that is because they looked at the percentage of people that would be more willing to buy because they thought, well, this is pretty cool. I'm getting a lifetime warranty and if anything breaks, I'll send it back. And then they looked at the percentage of people that would actually keep the receipt, keep all the paperwork that you need to have to actually get the warranty to use to be used,

and people just they aren't. They don't do it. They're not motivated to follow through with all that. So it's great because you sell more products. Number one, and number two, you almost never you almost never have to actually use the warranty when you have a lifetime warranty because they always put like small print that minute should nanny where they're like, Okay, you can use the warranty, but you have to keep the receipt and every time you get work done on the product, you have to have a

receipt of that. And if you don't have all of the above, you're fucked. Get out of here. Like how a lot of cars use the flimsy Uh what is it? It's almost like it's like a yeah, you push them in, you know, what's that musical? That's the what am I thinking of the music instrument? You know? Or you go like accordion? Accordion? Yes, the cars are like accordions and yeah and that that Yeah, that pisses me off too because you get an a fender bender, it's like, oh,

that's a well, you can't really see the damage. But underneath, how do we five thousand dollars We're gonna have to replace that entire panel? Yeah, where you're going to need every piece of currency, every coin you've ever made in your life. Uh, and you must secure a bag just to pay for the repairs. That's it, as Marshawn Lynch said years ago. Uh, take take care of y'all chicken. Right. That's uh, that's it. Wow. Anyway, thank you, thank you,

Ozzy Wise. Barry in nash Vegas writes in says yo yo mob Benny, and Danny Gee says Ben, So you bought a new to you car? Is this a color that Steve Harvey would marvel over? Well? As you know? And Barry of course referencing for those that are new to the podcast, the Great Steve Harvey, the modern day entertainer, the greatest entertainer of our lives right now. Steve Harvey man can host award shows, can host game shows, radio programs. He does it all. He's a one man band, a

great Steve Harvey. And he briefly worked at the iHeart Building in LA and he was doing his morning show when I was getting off the air. And so for a couple of months, Steve Harvey, television and Radio's most famous man, would park in our building and walk in in a jumpsuit with a security guard armed with a gun and would walk in and do his show and all that stuff. And at one point I was walking out, he was walking in. It was like ships passing in

the night. A couple of radio legends, well one radio legend and some fat guy. And he walked by and he looked at the Harvey's fat Now, dare you So he looked at the Malamobile. No, that means you're the legend, dick. No, I'm not a legend. So he looked. He looked at the Malamobile, as I liked it, and he was talking to his guy with the security guy, And that was right there. That was the moment that the Malamobile. It wasn't chump change, it wasn't. I didn't even know he

was talking about your car, though he was. There was no other car. You know, you've been in that parking lot at three in the morning. There's no other car in that parking lot three thirty in the morning. Maybe the security guard said, look, they make the losers park way far away from you, and he said, I like that. No, he liked the color. Hey liked the blue in the Malamobile. He loved the bull bullshit. There's no bullshit. I would not lie about something involving the great Steve Harvey, the

great entertainer of our time. But no, there's no you know, there's no color. It's just a generic it's a generic color, and he says, care to share the name plate of the car that you purchased? Yeah, I think I'm good on that. Very Unfortunately, some some certain certain people that love the show. I think I'll hold off on that because they sometimes kind of mess around with my business. You know what I'm saying. Danny occasionally car panel with a key I'm your number one fan. Yeah, yeah, I

think I'm okay. I think I think I'm all right on that. But I appreciate it, and I wish it wasn't like that. But I've created a good little cultivated here. We both have cultivated a good little following, and a certain percentage of those people take things a little bit too far. Next up, Kyrie in Okac writes in he says, dearest Ben and Danny, g how's it going. My real question is about logos. I would love for you to have your own official Ben mallor logo or mallor militia

to put on merchandise or tattoos. How about that, Danny? Yeah, I think it's some tattoos here, that's next level. I remember the day there was this guy called Main Main Event mister. You know, he's mister the main event was the guy's name. I think he was called that, and he called Fox Sports Radio for years. He passed away a few years ago. He loved Tony Bruno. He got a Tony Bruno tattoo and I thought, Wow, that's wild man, That's like the next level. I'm still blown away by that.

He liked tattoos, so tattoos. But that means the coroner was like, who the hell is Tony Bruno? Yeah, because they had to write down all the tattoos anyway, um, he says. The other real question is what are you guys? What are your guys favorite logos and all of sports besides your favorite teams, which is obviously a given obviously ha ha. As always, you guys are the absolute best podcast in all of the land. Much love from the real Kyrie. He don't playing Dallas, He's an okse and

Kyrie that Oklahoma City Thunder team. I watched some of that Laker Thunder game the other night. Holy crap, there is not one player worth their assault right now for the Thunder as Shane Gilgas Alexander was out with an injury, and that is a nameless, faceless group of flotsam and Jetsam. I love that game. Great job, Okac. Greatest logo though, I you know, I love and it's part of it's When I was a kid, I was on this team in Little League. The Milwaukee Brewers logo with the M

and the B. Love it. The Glove logo, you know, the glove logo. Love that one. Also, the Montreal Expo's logo. Same thing. It's got the M and the E in the logo. I love that. I just love the way it is. I like some of the old school logos, the old Toronto Blue Jays. When I was a kid, I always thought that was kind of cool. Um, China, these are all baseball. There's a bunch. I love the old Broncos logo and football. The horse, the original you know, the one on the helmet and all that. I thought

that was cool. You don't because you're a Raider fan. Um yeah, I mean there's there's a few few others. I get a kick out of a LEPrecon, the Celtics LEPrecon. I think that's just kind of hockey. A guy a LEPrecon with a basketball and like a cigar or not a cigar, a pipe. I think that's that's pretty funny. What about you, Danny, anything pop up here? Any logos that you Oh? Yeah, when I was a teenager, I had a Georgetown hat where the g was like made out of felt and was three D It's stuck out

of the hat a little bit. Yeah that was cool. So I would always rock some Georgetown for the gum and followed Patrick Ewing because of that. As a little kid, Patrick Ewing, the man could work up a sweat just by thinking about stepping onto the court. Unfortunately, he doesn't work up a sweat coaching Georgetown right now? Dare you? Um? You know? Also, my very first baseball glove was a Joe Morgan signature glove passed down to me by my uncle. Yeah,

I don't I remember him. I don't even remember him with the phillies. I don't. Well, at least that's when the baseball glove was made because it said Joe Morgan Phillies. Okay, And I love that powder blue with the with the maroon red philly. Oh yeah, that is a good looking uniform. Yeah, those uniforms. Ever since I was a little kid, I thought those uniforms were nice next to the Raiders uniform

of course, with our Dodger Blue. We're not allowed to say our favorite teams, but I've always thought those uniforms were the best in sports. Not a Phillies fan by any means, but I really like their uniforms. Yeah, the whole era of powder Blues. The Blue Jays had some cool I mentioned the Brewers already. The you know, the Mariner's early logo was pretty cool. They had the trident, the old Seattle Mary. Yeah, that's right. That was kind of a cool thing that they they got rid of.

Let's move on. Thank you, Kyrie, though you're the man I appreciate Kyrie. And Pierre from Springfield Mass writes in on the mail bag, friend of Alf the alien O Pinter, who has been shunned by the Great Eddie Judas Garcia. Yeah, we learned that Eddie Garcia muted Alf the alien O Piner. What oh no, that is an act of war, Danny g That isn't You cannot do that. Listen, Alf the alien O Piner is a samurai in the Mallard Militia. You do not mess with a samurai because you end

up with a sword. You do not do that. That's a bad job by you. Well, what happened after Eddie did that, he broke his toe. That is correct, you think, guys Karma, I think so yeah. And we learned, and this is some advanced calculus here little geometry, that the toe does impact the vocal cords. So I didn't know that. I had no idea. I learned that from doctor Eddie Garcia.

This week. I'm a doctrue, Pierre says Ben. We have all enjoyed your tales of Bella the Wonder Dog, but have there been any internal discussions at the Maller Mansion to add another pet to form voltron? Also, does Daddy g have any pets, so we have discussed getting another dog. Bella is in the doggy retirement home at this point. She's still here, but she's at the age now where she cannot go downstairs. She can go upstairs, but she can't go downstairs, which presents a problem because we have

a fair amount of stairs at the Mallard Mansion. So she's pretty much locked in her retirement home and it's it's one room. She's got access to the outside, she's got food, water and all that, but she can't roam freely. That and the fact that she has no control over her bowels or urinating, so that's also a problem. But we have decided also that Bella we want her to enjoy the final years of her life, however long she

has left. And so we've determined we're gonna wait and then once Bella goes to the kennel in the sky, and at that point we'll probably get another another dog. But Danny, any pets for you, Yeah, we have two. We have Daisy the dog. She has a chalky half Chihuahua, half Yorky. She's going on six years old. Her brain is the size of a pee, which means she's a really good guard dog because any little noise down by the front door and she goes berserk, a little door alarm.

And she could be sweet at times, but she also can be a snapper dog at night, especially if I reach too suddenly to touch my significant other. She snaps at my hand. She thinks she's a guard dog, a protector for my wife. Eat get away from me. That's not annoying at all. That is not at all, but I'm used to it now. And at least her teeth hurt for a second, but they don't break the skin, which is good. Then my boy Mac. If you followed me on social media, you've probably seen pictures from time

to time. He is a very cool silver and black American short hair and he looks like a panther. He is a badass. He's also going on six years old. And the two of them they do nap next to each other. But again at night, if he jumps up on the bed, she snaps at him and bites his ass. Don't do a lost cap magnet pencil. Next, any plans to add more pets? Any plan? Well, you're adding a child. Yeah, as everybody knows, it's not good timing to add a new pet with a new baby. Yeah, probably don't need that.

Next up, Chris in Maraccaa, Iowa rights, and he says, Ben, I just learned of the near fatal Steve Yeager accident in nineteen seventy six when a shattered bat shard struck him in the neck. I haven't been able to find video of it. Do you know where to find it or have you heard any stories about it? He says, ps Go Raiders and good Ritten's car. So to lead off here, Chris, Yes, I have heard about the Steve Yeager bat It was before my time. I was a

little kid when that happened. And the reason I know about it is when I covered the Dodgers, and this is in the early nineties. Steve Yeager would pop up every once in a while and show up for batting practice or some kind of an event, and occasionally the story would be brought up about you remember what happened to Yeager? He almost died and all this crazy, crazy stuff back in the nineteen seventies. And I have not seen any video. I'm sure there's probably video that exists,

but I don't know for sure. I mean not every game was on television in nineteen seventy six, so it is possible there is no video. But this was back when Walter Alston was the manager of the Dodgers, and the legend is that he got hit Steve Garvey. It was Bill Russell was the one that it was his bat and Yeager was in the on deck circle and Bill Russell, the great Dodger shortstop, He had a grounder to third base. The bat broke and flew back and Yeager had no chance. The sharp edge impales this guy

right in the in the side of his neck. He's been stabbed with a with a flying knife and everyone starts freaking out, and Bill Bueller, the Dodger trainer, has been credited with saving the life much like the Buffalo Bill's guy that almost died Tomorrow Hamlin. And so the Dodger trainer came out and Steve Garvey. The legend is he had a towel he covered up the blood for because he didn't want the people in stadium to see it. And obviously you don't want the guy to bleed to death.

And anyway, but I have not seen the most important part. The Dodgers beat the Padres that day four to one. There you go, that's all. Yeah, you go. The Dodgers won the game September six, nineteen seventy six. Look at you, look at you. So But to answer your question, I've not seen video. I hadn't really thought about it, Chris, until you brought it up. It is one of those stories that's kind of gotten lost. Yeah, time and that happens. And a quick Google search doesn't show any video, but

he shows still photos. Yeah, and am I the only one. When I was younger, when I heard the name Steve Yeager, I thought of the pilot, you know, the pilot Yeager. I think you're the only one. Really. Some alcoholics might think of the drink Yeager, mister, No, wasn't there there was a Oh, Chuck Yeager. That was the guy. I was just figured Chuck. Yeah, you know I remember Chuck Yeager. Yeah, yeah, I think he just passed away a couple of years ago. He lived to be almost a hundred. But Mike from

Fullerton writes in on the mail bag. He says, hey, Ben, before buying another boring card to replace the malon will Be, Oh, why didn't you go with the scooter instead? He says. He says they get better mileage and will make the long trip from the north Woods to the studio a lot more fun. I know Danny ge will Be will back me up on this after the great experience he had with that one at the Super Bowl. Also, how much are both of you looking forward to the World

Baseball Classic? He says? Will your shows be covering it? Or will I have to look elsewhere to hear how Mike Trout and the rest of Team USA are doing? God that America? Yeah, very funny, very funny, Mike. This is as an Angel fan, this is all you have is the world baseball classy, he says. Also an update on deep fake porno, a Twitch streamer is already suing a website for hosting deep fake naked videos for her. Will you guys be upset or flattered if someone made

a deep fake video of you naked? Yeah? So, first of all, I would be flattered because it would look better than I look, I would assume, so that would be flattering. I can't imagine it would be uglier than I look, so I think I would be happy with that, So I would be okay, Well, what about your Danny ge It would be fine. So this would be the first time I get a full frontal with no blur. You go down some of those websites, it's like the Wild Wild West on there. Man, it is wacky and

wild and gig giggy. Noah from Austin writes, and he says, salutations Big Ben and Danny Gee. If you could compete in two Olympic events, which would you choose? Winter or summer? Doesn't matter, So this is kind of a generic, off brand question for this time of the year. Noah, I don't think the Olympics are going on right now, are they? Danny? I don't think they're coming up anytimes. No, Yeah, so

I haven't really thought about Olympic events. But if I could win some track and field event would be a lot of fun. Doing the loop where they go down the track there that looks like it's pretty wild. I don't know that i'd look good in that that cat suit that these people have to wear. I don't think I want to do that. You can win in gold as a speed walker, the way you used to walk around the studios outside at night. Yeah, I could do that. I still want to do the marathon. I want to

do a marathon before I get too old. And I won't run it, but I'll do like speedwalk. I try to convince my My wife's been doing some more like walking and running and stuff like that, and so she's she's coming around to it, but she's like, I do like four or five miles. I'm gonna I'm not gonna twenty six miles. It's one day, you know, just go

for it. One day. You can knock yourself out. Just promise me, when you finally do it, that you wear a Lebron James headband, because you cannot speed walk without a headband. Has to be a white Headband too racist. Well, you gotta do the whole like arm the old women their arms up and down. You know that whole looks like you're doing the robot. Yeah, yeah, like that kind of deal. All. I think we'll get out of that.

We did get a couple of other ones. Hutch sent a nice man a letter in he says he was He says he doesn't have any questions, but he loves the podcast. He says he was a little cross player in Baltimore and he was friends with Johnny Unitis. How about that and Mike Curtis a couple of legends. He says, So he's from the old school, and he points out that he keeps up with the show. He loves the radio show, the podcast, he says. He says, I listened

all the time on the podcast. My son has a sports podcast in Richmond, Virginia, and after five months he has seventy five thousand followers. Wow, nice, hey, Hutch, can you tell your son to help hook us up him? And then man, my god, it's a lot good for him. And then John wrote in He's says a long time podcast listener from Omaha. And here's this question, Danny. He said quote, I liked the Chiefs, that was his question. So I like the Saints, Hi, I'd like the Saints. Yeah,

thank you for that. All right, thank you all weekend. These have been great podcasts. We thank you for supporting the podcast. And tell a friend and all that anything you would like to sell, promote, yell, shout, scream, any of that, Danny, we want to do right now. Well, tonight you're back on the radio. Packaging, packaging. I don't think so, Ben, And that means as I listened to you on the radio, I'm like, oh shit, I gotta get to bed because I got to wake up and

start my Monday prepare. So Vino and Rich's afternoon show we'll be on the airwaves at two to four pm on the West Coast. And rumor is rumor has it, I should say, rumor has it? Is it true that a senior member of the Malla militia will be making a rare and appropriate in studio visit on Sunday night in the Monday morning. So tonight, in the Monday morning, stay tuned. This person says they're gonna show up. They have a high possibility of flaking though, Danny, So we'll

see if fat cells a part of this equation. Man, from your lips to my stomach. Anyway, have a great rest of your day and we will hitch you up on the podcast next weekend. We got radio all week though, between myself and Danny Gee, so we'll have a wonderful rest of your day later, Skater, gotta murder, Gotta go.