The Fifth Column - podcast cover

The Fifth Column

Kmele Foster, Michael Moynihan, and Matt Welchwww.wethefifth.com
Your weekly rhetorical assault on the on the news cycle, the people who make it, and occasionally ourselves. Kmele Foster (Freethink), Michael Moynihan (Vice), and Matt Welch (Reason) talk and laugh and drink their way to at least quasi-sanity in a world gone mad, often with the aid of clean and articulate guests. Weekly Members Only subscription edition often comes with listener mail and professional-quality (if inappropriate) singing. Analysis. Commentary. Sedition.

www.wethefifth.com

Episodes

#444 - We Sell Sanctuary

* The worst Scouse accent ever * Blackfishing * Trump and Tish * Lawyers and lawfare * A lunatic DEI artifact from…that company * Congress’s Venceremos Brigade * The immigrant song * The lads disagree… * With burning concern * Fetterman, Mitch, Biden, Tucker again * Matt Remke getting worked * And so much more! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.wethefifth.com/subscribe...

Mar 02, 20242 hr 1 min

Members Only #202 - The End of Vice

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * Back to New York * Subways and free markets * Milei pisses on mercantilism, MAGA types don’t notice * The Foxconn con * The rise and fall of Vice * No one talks about the content…they should * Funny, QAnon all the time doesn’t make money * Shane Gillis om SNL * Nora Dunn and Dice * The people will always decide * A very specific digression on Kansas City. Sorry. * Revisiting that …...

Feb 26, 202424 min

Members Only #201 - The Sounds of Blackness

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com Matt calls in from a murder motel in Southern California that doesn’t really have wifi. He saves a few bucks. Kmele and Moynihan do the heavy lift. Everybody wins. A few topics discussed: * Houthi bodegas * Industrial policy schizophrenia * Will Kmele join the “back to Africa” movement? * Ujamma and Nyerere’s stash * The Fighting Sullivans (and no, the youngest wasn’…...

Feb 22, 202412 min

#443 - Take a Load off Fani / RIP Alexei

* The Fani Willis train wreck * Daddy and the sacks of cash * $9,999 * Russian McDonalds is so good that Tucker doesn’t care about freedom of the press * The political pilgrim * The murder of Alexei Navalny * A wave of whataboutism * Are your 19 year old daughters about to be drafted to fight in Gaza? * Time to retreat from the world? * OpenAI videos are sort of terrifying * Free Rachel Dolezal Kwame Nkrumah This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get ac...

Feb 16, 20241 hr 17 min

Members Only #200 - The Anti-Racist Headset

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com Kmele gets an Apple Vision Thing because of he course he does. And he wears it the whole episode because of course he does. It’s a racist product, btw. And Bobby Jr’s Super Bowl ad was good. And Matt likes Usher, it seems. And certain conservatives like visiting and praising dirtbag dictatorships. And in case you hadn’t noticed, Joe Biden thinks it’s 19…...

Feb 14, 202434 min

#442 - In Defense of Colorblindness (w/ Coleman Hughes)

We’re back with two episodes smashed into one! So if you have a spare two hours… First up, our friend Coleman Hughes returns for a one-on-one conversation with Kmele about his brand-new book The End of Race Politics, which you should buy immediately . Also: Coleman was on Bill Maher’s show on Friday, most of which is available on YouTube. After an hour with Coleman, the full team is back for a few very uncomfortable conversations about a few very uncomfortable topics. Just listen and you’ll unde...

Feb 11, 20242 hr 10 min

Members Only #199 - Why You Should Never Fly Coach

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com A rebroadcast of Sunday’s live Zoom, available only to subscribers, of course. And this particular live event was only available to Never Fly Coach- tier subscribers. So you know what that means: If you’re not subscribed, maybe it’s time to pony up? And if you’re already a subscriber…remember that there are different tiers and that we can, in fact, quite…...

Feb 09, 202417 min

#441 - Dancing Daggers, Disturbed Dignity & Dozens of Drives to Delaware

* The point of a dagger * The Messenger of death * The billionaire model * WE NEED SOME QUICK BITES * The murder of James O’Keefe * Horrible people, horrible ideas, great writing * Requisite 2024 talk * In (soft of) defense of Jon Stewart * Cori Bush is the Whitney Houston of Congress * LD on Simmons pod * Jamaal Bowmen is the Philip Larkin of 9/11 (hmmmmmm) * Yay for Aaron! * And so much more! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus ...

Feb 01, 20241 hr 28 min

Members Only #198 - Everybody's a Critic (Vol. 144)

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * A black man on his toes * MJ at the Apollo * A “Compassionate” Traitor * Ron Radosh’s review of the doc * An entire life of lies * And a list of actual commies in the government (Note from MM: When I say “married to Ethel Rosenberg, * A shitty copy of Mission to Moscow * Listeners and Redditors: you’re wrong about Trump and democracy * The man vs. the movement / MAGA vs. po…...

Jan 29, 202428 min

#440 - From Nashua to Haaazzaaa

Oh dear. Watching the New Hampshire returns, the lads do a spot-on impression of the good old, liquor-soaked days of 2016 Fifth Column and get pretty deep in their cups…so yeah, sorry about this one. * Trump wins * Cutting from Trump’s dumb speech * 20 percent for Dean Phillips * This is, in fact, democracy * No one says anything on cable news * The speeches * The overstatement machine * Moralism doesn’t work * A brave defense of Iran-backed Islamism * A sort of drunken rant about hipster Houthi...

Jan 24, 20241 hr 59 min

Members Only #197 - Grappling Joe, Ending Ron, Inevitable Don

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * Michael Winslow RIP? * Joe Rogan would tear Kmele in half * The cockfighting story that never was * Some pretty pathetic fight stories * That insane UK piano player video * HHHHHHAMAAAAAAZZZ * Chris on Kmele’s pejorative for the Irish * The end of Ron * It was always “inevitable” * Back to the basement * Voters and immigration: not that complicated * You want European politics? * Trump’…...

Jan 23, 202421 min

#439 - Ladies Tees and Democracy Pleas

* This time, we’re not going to hold back * Destroying from the ladies tees * I love with Doug * More media implosions * ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ * Democracy is over when my irrelevant newspaper folds * Passover is too Jewish * The uniqueness of the Holocaust * Opinion mongers making calls about newsworthiness * This era as history * Whatchutalkinabout Fani Willis * Ross Douthat and “Neocon Nikki” This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, vi...

Jan 21, 20241 hr 50 min

Members Only #196 - You Make a Lotta Money

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com In a rebroadcast of our latest Second Sunday, Tina Nguyen joins the lads again to discuss Substack, Andrew Yang, Kmele fighting another podcast host, James Bond, Tucker Carlson, Vietnamese immigrants, militias, and…the great Tom Vu. In case you’re unfamiliar with America’s greatest Vietnamese import, some of his greatest hits ....

Jan 19, 202416 min

#438 - Guns & Flip Flops (w/ Tina Nguyen)

* The year of the ladies * They’re pro-Houthi * They’re Weebs * The MAGA Diaries * The diaspora politics of the Vietnamese * MAGA Straussianism * Tina and Tucker * Tina and the militias * Kmele and the Houthis * It’s always World War Three * Just say they went too far… * NYT on Russia bombing hospitals * Some Iowa thoughts * Some brief thoughts on the fake Substack Nazi controversy This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, vis...

Jan 16, 20241 hr 39 min

Members Only #195 - No Limit Consultants LLC

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * Matt, swallowed by Los Alamos * Jon Ronson’s new pod * A terrible trailer, a pretentious movie * Ringo Seal!!! Trump is “being persecuted” * Head injuries that help * Listen to that podcast, even if it’s terrible * A hot plagiarist * Substack and Nazis * Chomsky and Jeffery * Kmele’s new favorite football player * And so much more!...

Jan 09, 202413 min

#437 - Gay Divorce

Should we even bother with the normal bullet points? Because it’s mostly about Claudine Gay. And the media’s embarrassing reaction to Gay’s “duplicative phrasing” and “attribution issues.” And what this says about the rot in academia. And something about a Disney Plus show. And ladies who live in trees. And how Kmele’s ice has to be colder than Welch’s ice. And a generation of dumb intellectuals. Enjoy. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access ...

Jan 04, 20241 hr 44 min

Members Only #194 - 2023 Was an Inside Job

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * The last one of the year * The French public sector * Macron and the menorah * Exploding appliances * Nick & Kanye * Nikki’s slavery gaffe * But does she have a shot? * Billionaires on the “billionaire class” * Don’t forget about RFK * Who blew up the pipeline? * Why we believe what we believe * Vivek’s “inside job”...

Dec 29, 202314 min

Members Only #193 – ‘I Don’t Think Anyone in Israel Right Now Feels Left of Center’ (w/ Asaf Zamir)

* I resign! * (“That was a great apartment….”) * I resign! * (“That was the worst job….”) * Mansplaining the war * Too big to process * It’s like 9/11 for Americans, and also not * “You can still smell the death” * The Jericho Wall revelations * “I’m pretty sure most people who were responsible will resign” * Were judicial protests a distraction? * State fails, society rallies * A time for Diaspora choosing * Like moths to crazy * Intelligence scandal, leadership scandal * Hard out here for a tw...

Dec 24, 20231 hr 7 min

#436 - From Gavin to Gotham

* Can Kmele sing? * A guy is surrounded by some racists * In praise of…Alec Baldwin? * Protesters are like racists * Trump and Colorado * Smart people who have come to some strange conclusions on this… * He’s screwing with you. You know that right? * They think you don’t understand policy * Not a lot of loyalty….(plus: a paean to Hope Hicks) * One word: NEW YORK * From Jihad to Lego * A silly list of “media influencers” * Is Emmanuel Lewis alive? (Yes) This is a public episode. If you'd like to ...

Dec 21, 20231 hr 25 min

Members Only #192 - Second Sunday Replay (12/10)

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * It wasn’t a debate * Moynihan loves islands. Who doesn’t? * University stuff * “Late capitalism” * Walt Disney wasn’t a Nazi * Backfilling history * Massaging numbers * On the Qataris…. * And a bunch of listeners chime in!

Dec 17, 202314 min

#435 - TFC's Holiday Racism Spectacular!

* Ron Karenga * Handel’s Messiah and stock portfolio * Musicology is dumb, says Matt * Hip-hop is appropriation and it’s great * Method Man thinks the Stones and Bootsy are the same * The Fall of Minneapolis * The Fifth’s verdict * Some good things, some bad things * Revisiting the Chauvin trial * An 800,000 word reflection from James Bennet * Fanaticism and forgivenness * How is this plagiarist surviving? * How about firing these dopes * LP and AJ * The many, many, many dead in Ukraine This is ...

Dec 15, 20231 hr 45 min

#434 - Crazed Conspiracies, Moral Mulligans, and Indecent Ivies (w/ Shadi Hamid)

* The editorial board of the Washington Post * What what wrong with the cease fire * On culpability * Can there *be* a negotiated settlement? * Is it really “the occupation”? * That wild 2022 video from Jenin that Moynihan mentioned * You’re going to be defrocked * Being handcuffed by “the Nahkba” * The insane rape conspiracy theories—and why they exist * Are all these people pro-Hamas? * Mrs. Gay Goes to Washington * Choose different words, dummies * Are you allowed a moral mulligan? * The Calv...

Dec 07, 20231 hr 56 min

#433 - The Body of a (German) American

* We ain’t gonna play Sun City * RIP Shane * George Santos: genius * Gavin v. Ron * Why would you do this, Gavin? * This awful presidential race * Hating WFB * Be friends with and “platform” your political opposites * RIP Kissinger? * Dictatorships and double standards * The forever war with Iran * An awful, awful hostage video * On hostages and peace partners * The future of Gaza This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visi...

Dec 02, 20231 hr 40 min

Members Only #191 - Can We Be Trusted? (Ummm...)

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * A shooting in the hood * The Oakland Politburo speaks. The world is appalled. * The free speech issue vs. the university infection * Knowing nothing but propaganda * Gaza Facebook is pretty wild * Sir Humphrey says: “This is the most insane answer ever” * What Epstein got right. And you gotta bring Bill Clinton * A weird story about Hillary’s shushing * UFO nonsense * What’s th…...

Nov 29, 202317 min

#432 - Worse Than Hitler (A Fifth Column Thanksgiving!)

Family beckons. Booze beckons. So we’re going to forgo the bullet points that we’re pretty sure you don’t read anyway and just say…Happy Thanksgiving, from your friends at the Fifth! And while you shamelessly celebrate genocide, listen along while the lads bemoan the racism of the Black Plague; the deadline to file charges against Kmele; the quote-invention of ChatGPT; the hostage deal in Israel; and the extreme awfulness of Holocaust historians Joe Scarborough, Mike Brzezinski, and Claire McCas...

Nov 23, 20231 hr 47 min

Members Only #190 - Tantric Drummers for Freedom

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * Javier Milei, tantric drummer * The hideousness of modern Peronism * A brief digression on Aerosmith * So how did we all meet? * Start fighting, Moynihan * Another digression on Sam Altman’s awfulness (two examples now available at Moynihan’s Instagram ) * When Israel decided against killing the entire leadership of Hamas * Well, they tried anyway * Fiction that changed our lives * I don’t want to read about who I...

Nov 22, 202330 min

#430 - The TikTok Jihad w/ Mary Katharine Ham

* Live from Oakland * Sex strikes * Loving OBL * Stop deconstructing stuff * Seeing your friends spinout online… * They’re not sending anyone anywhere * Drunk Kathy Hochul and her bad, drunk ideas * Not drunk Nikki Haley and her bad ideas * Hate speech isn’t a thing in America * Israel and propaganda * MKH on evangelicals, Israel, and the supposed “left behind” vision of Zionism * TikTok you don’t stop * And so much more! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscri...

Nov 18, 20231 hr 44 min

Members Only #189 - "Thank You for the A-Bomb" (Second Sunday Rebroadcast)

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * “She’s reasonable in person” (🤔) * In praise of…Estonia * Are any expressly political comedians funny? * Meetings interrupted by death * Listener question: On the 1619 Project * Indonesian guys loves America, nuclear weapons * Family friends with Carlos the Jackal * Israel asks: “Kmele, what should we do?” * Stars and Bucks (Correction: Bethlehem not Ramallah) * Why not get a…...

Nov 16, 202328 min

#429 - The Kevin Hart Resource Curse

* One hell of a night, one brutal morning * Kevin Hart kills * Judy Gold and college comedy * The Washington Post says sorry for being mean to Hamas * Be brave, get fired? * There’s been a bunch of recent Islamist attacks in the West, actually * New York City’s hate crimes leader board * The pointless Republican debate * Vivek is the worst (and also was kinda good for three seconds) * Reaganism without Reagan (and Bannon’s Reagan film ) * Only in New York, kids * Trust the kids, kids * Teaching ...

Nov 12, 20231 hr 14 min

Members Only #188 - Shine on You Crazy 'Anti-Zionist'

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit www.wethefifth.com * Voting for New York judges (and do you have a spare apartment?) * An unsolicited application * Liz Warren warns about the surge of…. * Is violent anti-Semitism in the U.S. a real threat? * Explain the progressive-Islamist alliance please… * He has become comfortably dumb * No, it’s not really fishy * Defining war, war crimes, and civilians * The government’s stupid war on (pr…...

Nov 08, 202330 min
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