Intentional Connections: Strategies for Building Strong Communities

If you've ever joined a company and everybody's looking inward, so when they need information, they're looking to somebody inside. When they're looking for what the new regulations mean, they're looking for someone inside the organization to help them. And I think when you're only looking inward, you don't have the same view, vantage, or information as when you look outward.

Welcome to the Executive Connect podcast, a show for the new generation of leaders. Join Melissa R. Skog as she speaks to a wide variety of guests that bring new insights into leadership, prosperity, and personal growth. While no one has all the answers, by building a community of open-minded and engaged leaders, we hope to give you the tools you need to help you find your own path to success. Welcome to the Executive Connect podcast. Today I have Diane Kenyon here with us to talk about

community. Thank you so much for being here today. Diane, would you mind introducing yourself? Hi, I'm Diane Kenyon. I've been active in the Austin community of the tech community and the nonprofit community for a long time. Currently I'm active with Austin Women in Technology, Society of Information Management in Ostehn. Austin Technology Council LinkedIn Local. So I'm active with a lot of groups in the community, both giving and learning from these groups.

Thank you so much for being here today Diane. What does the concept of community mean to you? Well, I hear a lot of people talk about work like Falons, like it's Polar. There's two things and you know, you're either at work or you're at life and they're talking about integration and instead of this teeter-totter approach to our lives, I really see it as a three-legged stool. When in addition to work

in life, there's community and that's the people you interact with that are optional. Like it's not your immediate family, it's not your work family, it's optional. So looking at a three-legged stool from that perspective, the seat becomes yourself. That's you. And to find balance, you need all three

legs in the game. So you know, you you want that community, that tribe, those people, the place where you know you can learn and grow, where you can connect with like-minded folks where you can learn from people that think differently than you. But you know, both participating in community, whether it's in professional organizations or nonprofits, volunteering, both participating, giving, leading in those areas, there's just a lot of things that happen in community with others.

I think we all felt it when we went into the pandemic, right? So you know, that that community went away. And so, you know, let's let's talk about how to get it back. Yeah, that's a really great point. You know, we have our lives are becoming more digital each and every day. We're online, Zoom meetings, team meetings. We're all Zoom fatigued out. So from your perspective, how do we balance

virtual communities versus in-person communities and connections? I think the answer varies differently when you talk about balance. But I think the keyword that comes to my mind every time I think about community is intentionality. Like what am I intentionally doing? Where do I intentionally want to give? Then my time, what do I want to learn? How do I want to grow?

Who, how many connections do I want to make this month? So being intentional around what your goals are, what your learning opportunities are, what your cost-benefit analysis is, I mean, everything around what you're doing in that space, right? So if you're a high-entrevert, being intentional may be meeting one-on-one with somebody for coffee once a month, somebody different. It may be only joining virtual sessions and joining the discussion when you feel comfortable, but doing that at least

once a month. If you're an extrovert and you get your energy from people, they don't have to be as intentional because they thrive in that space. They want to go meet new people. They want to learn new things. They're wanting to contribute in the space, give back in some way. So I think we see it that it's easier for them, but it's not always easier for them. When you have children at home, you have commitments. So you have to find what works for you and what's intentional for you.

And I would say you want to plan it, you want to set a goal, you want to measure it, you want to see how you did, and then you want to repeat. So just start, maybe it's, maybe it's two events a month. That's where I started when I moved to Austin. It was like, I didn't know anybody. And I said, I'm going to go to two external events a month. I'm going to meet people. I'm going to meet at least

two people that I will follow up with at each event I go to. And you track that and you measure that, and then you know what you're building and you're gaining for the time that you spent. Yeah, well said. I think, you know, I also think community, it's, you've got to have a community before you ask from the community, right? You have your work, like you mentioned in your family, but your community, they can help you in all different areas outside of, you know, job stuff that can

help you. I've had some of my community friends move me many times in my life and they would have never come in and helped me move unless I had those relationships because nobody likes moving.

And that's a really good point to measure it. I think just saying once a month or twice a month, we're going to attend something, but it's easy to push those things off like when you are an introvert in person because you're nervous and, you know, maybe you stand in the corner of the first 10 times of doing it and over time you get better and more comfortable getting out there and building a community with people. And, you know, I think about like maybe an experience. Can you share with us

either a personal or professional experience of where being part of a community had a significant impact on your life? I can think of several. I'd like to maybe sure when I started, you know, when I first came to us and I was doing two events a month and one of the organizations I joined at that time was the CIO, CTO form, the Austin Technology Council had. Actually, I think it's Austin's before council at the time and it's evolved over time. And then when Sim started, then it folded into Sim.

And I joined that group to get references for vendors for active. I was running IT department. I needed somebody to cable. I needed somebody to help me with my phone systems. I needed, you know, somebody to talk to that had dealt on a much larger level than I had with Microsoft. And so, you know,

I formed those relationships and I gave and you know, I asked, I mean, it was a given take, right? And at one point, and I don't know that it was a mutual benefit, but I was, I happened to be between jobs. I was actively looking for a full-time opportunity and I got a call from one of my CIO connections who just said, you know, Diane, are you still looking for work? And I said, yes, I am. He said, have you considered contract? I said, I can. He says, I really, I really need a favor.

And so, that was an opportunity for me to help him as much as he was helping me. And so, as a favor to him, you know, I got engaged and went in and did some contracts CIO work for a business, an associate business that his company worked with. So, you know, I think it helped me and it helped him. And that's what community is about. You're giving and you're receiving. Yeah, absolutely well said. I think they think of you, right? When you have a relationship

and you build a relationship, they're like, oh, I have this problem and I know Diane can solve it. So, your top of mind when you're regularly around people and following up like you mentioned and keeping in constant contact or some kind of cadence with people at networking events. And how do you think building communities can help you from a professional growth perspective and maybe a personal growth perspective? A lot, you know, I guess, you know, if you've ever joined a company

and everybody's looking inward, they're always looking inward. So, when they need information, they're looking to somebody inside. When they're looking for, you know, what the new regulations mean, they're looking for someone inside the organization to help them. And I think when you're only looking

inward, you don't have the same view, vantage or information as when you look outward. And so, you know, I've been a part of Agile Austin over the years and going to their events and hearing their challenges and their discussions and participating in those has gained me so much knowledge about Agile processes, Agile challenges. And it's able me to really coach my people. So, personally, I'm always learning. I may have an interest in something. I may not have an interest in it. I

share, I'll share, I went to an event one time and you can find free events everywhere. If you want to go to anything, whether it's professional or personal, you can find free events in your area that you can attend. And so, it was a co-working space. I was having an open house. I wasn't looking for co-working space, but I didn't know a lot about co-working space at the time. This was, you know, probably four or five years before we were. And so, I signed up. I went to their social. I heard

their sales pitch. I met some people. One of the people I met there has a huge network of central Texas entrepreneurs and business connectors. So, now I'm a part of his network as well. So, you know, it's both personal and it's professional. And, you know, it's like if you don't ask for something, you're assuming the answer is no. And if you know someone that might be able to help you and you ask,

they're going to go above and beyond to help you. And it's both give and take. I, I, I respond to a lot of requests and in return, a lot of people respond to my requests. But that's what makes the world go around is that community and helping and supporting each other. And whether you're going for professional benefit, learning, education, knowledge, new ideas, or whether you're going for a hobby, there's an opportunity to expand your network. I love it. It sounds like you push yourself out of

your comfort zone as well in areas that you may not be an expert in. I think a lot of times we are drawn to areas that we know about or we have interest in. And it sounds like you, you've just shown out places to learn something new that you otherwise would not have and been open to make new connections

which is amazing. I know that I didn't even think about just doing it myself. I think that's a great idea because I usually myself just go to technology events that interest me in AI or cyber women. But you're right. You do learn a lot about other things and you never know when you might need to take that tool from your toolbox or who knows who you're going to meet at these at these events.

So how do you, is there a specific like tool you use to manage yourself or process that you flow through to keep track of all your connections? How do you nurture them both personally and online? Well, that's a challenge. In the good old days, you know, I had a huge roller dex of business cards and those days are out the window, right? I will say LinkedIn is my tool of choice. And I I try, anyone I meet, I try to connect with on LinkedIn. The QR code, there's really simple so you

can do that. I meet people that aren't on LinkedIn, it's a little bit harder. I try to make sure I get them in my contacts and my email and things like that. So, you know, I think that's the tracking part of it from my activities. I normally track those on my calendar. So I know how I'm doing against my goals and my metrics. But you talk about connecting and I think it's connecting people with people,

it's connecting people with ideas, it's connecting people with opportunities. And one of my innate abilities is really, you know, putting the pieces together. So if I, I was at a recent Austin women technology event and there were a lot of people around and hi, Diane, hi, Diane, hi, Diane, and at some

point I was like, do I know this person? I guess I do. Yeah, it was hard to connect the dots because when you don't see them for so long, it's not as easy to recognize and recall their, their name as it was when you saw them last month or the month before. And I had one of the board members ask about, do you know of any UI or UX positions? And since I'm currently in the job market and I'm looking at

different opportunities, I came across one and then I was like, who was that? Who was that that was running it? I knew Emily had asked and so I posted it on Slack and she responded and she connected me with the person and I've been, as I see opportunities, I've been sending them to her.

You know, but it's, you know, it looking at people online, looking at LinkedIn, seeing somebody's business in the news and sending them a note, you know, congratulating someone when they get promoted, you know, being there when somebody needs a conversation about this doesn't feel right that they're asking me to do this at work. I mean, just making yourself available, trying to find as many ways when

someone asked me for help to say yes, let's figure out when we can do this. And when I'm asking for help being very intentional and specific about what I would like or what I would need. And it's being active on LinkedIn is part of it because if I post and people see it, then, you know, it's different than if they haven't thought about me for five years. So, I'm just, and sent you mentioned LinkedIn

and my phone's sitting right here. I think you nailed on a point that we should use our phone on here. So you mentioned connecting with people on LinkedIn. Correct. Awesome. Okay. So, you know, the good old fashion way, we'd give our business card, we stick it in our pocket, we stick, stick it in our purse, and then we forget about the business card, your kid would get it, the dog would get it,

you'd lose it, whatever happened. We're right. Everybody has a phone now. So, if you download the LinkedIn app and I'm on my links in here, oh, let's ignore that. If you go to the top right here, there's the search bar and next to the search bar, there's a QR code and it should look just like this. And you could scan it and people can directly, like you said, connect with you on LinkedIn. So, it's done for you. You don't need a business card and you can connect with them that way. It's a

great, great point, Diane. I don't think many people know that trick. I am amazed at how many people I show that to when I'm networking or out socially. So, thank you for that. It's a good point. One other thing I was thinking about when you were talking is sometimes in fields, like if you're an engineer, there's society of women engineers or American society, civil engineers. I've been part of

those organizations for my career. Are there instances where you would think that if you were convenking or compliance that maybe it's you should join certain organizations because it could negatively affect your job? So, is there any important factors to consider when you're thinking about joining an organization or adding that group to your social media? Well, I think we all think that politics and religion really don't have a place in the business world.

It doesn't mean that you can't. You just want to be careful. Yeah, if you're a Trump Patriot patriot and you want to blast that and join groups and show that on LinkedIn or on Facebook, just know that other people can see that and you know you might be asked about it. If you feel strongly about it and you can defend your position on it and your reasoning

and that doesn't make you uncomfortable, I think it's okay. Whether it's about church, whether it's about something controversial, but it becomes part of your permanent digital footprint. And it's not really something you can erase over time. So, you just want to be cautious about what's in your professional footprint and what's in your digital footprint, especially if you're going to

be working for others. Yeah, well said. I think I've seen some stuff on social media where I'm like, "Uh oh, hopefully, knowing what they did for a living, hopefully, they're careful on how they reply." So, I think it's right having, you know, being mindful that, you know, your bosses, your employers, your CEOs, people may not be a Republican, they might be a Democrat, so be careful on, you know, how you reply to, you know, politics, the religion, or all the things that could be

misconstrued. I know there's one other point I wanted. I always think of, you know, like you mentioned at the beginning, communities have changed a lot since the pandemic, where people originally, you know, were working out of an office, and now, you know, they're working remote at their desk in their home by themselves. So, how do you think in the world today that the at-office hybrid,

how does that work from your perspective these days, from a community perspective? Good, bad, and different. I don't know. The hybrid versus remote versus full-time in office, this is a debate that's going to continue for many decades as to which is better and why. I mean, it's like, work-life balance was introduced in kind of the 70s and the 80s, and it's still being talked about, right? So, I think it's

something that's going to continue. I think a lot of those decisions are made not because you need community or you don't need community. A lot of those decisions are made based on the amount of flexibility you would like, the other obligations you have in your life, your priorities, and how much time you want to spend on the commute. I think, you know, those are individual things that need to

be assessed and determined for each person. Whether you're working 100% remote or you're 100% in the office, you're expected to work with your teammates, right? So, that's the small work community and you just want to think about what are you doing to expand that community within the organization? Because community, inside the organization's important community, outside the organization's important. So, what are you doing to nurture that? Are you scheduling coffee or virtual coffee? Are you

scheduling a virtual, let's have a Friday afternoon, game? What are you doing to nurture that and encourage that? The water cooler conversations are not gone. If you're not in them, how are you going to get involved? Well said, I think for the people that are virtual employees that work from their home, you know that the water cooler discussions are important. Make yourself visible. If you're not

near an office, how can you still connect with your peers, your bosses? Either getting to their corporate office is getting on a plane, getting on a train, an automobile, however you have to get there, but making yourself known and getting your own brand into the organization. So, if you're just at your desk, whittling away at your job, you're not really being seen, right? From other people in the

organization. So, you have to, like you said, setting up a virtual coffee or getting to connect with your peers is super, super important. I would absolutely echo that. I know that subject I'm always, I'm like, is it good? Is it bad? Where have we gone? You know, the one thing I do think is, you know, if you're a mountain employee, you've lost a lot of your sense of community by going to the office. Like you mentioned, work cooler conversations, collaborating with people. You lose a lot of

that touchy feeling, you know, collaboration with your peers. And like you mentioned at the beginning, it's really important if you're a hybrid person by yourself all day, get out of the office and talk to an adult, talk to some other people and build a community around your area. So, in closing day, and just kind of final thoughts, I mean top three things people could do from your perspective to

build a community and maybe secondly part me, how do they get started if they've never done it? I think I would say the three-step process is kind of, you know, think about it and set a goal. You know, build a plan for 30 or 60, 90 days, execute on the plan and then see how you're doing. And to get started, you know, I'm a big believer in looking at Facebook events, looking at meet-up events, looking at event bright, looking at LinkedIn events, there's do 512, there's do whatever

your area code is, and there's options out there. You know what you're working on to professionally grow and so if you want to do professional, then go find those people. If you want to learn more about agile or you have agile problems you want to solve, go join an agile team or a group or a special interest group. If you want to learn more about healthcare, join a healthcare organization, you know, networking organization, if it's not professional, then find something personal that's

of interest. You know, whether it be at church, whether it be volunteering, whether it be, you know, some other hobby or interest that you have, if you want to learn more about drones, go find

somebody else you can connect with and learn more about drones. So, you know, it's taking action, it's being intentional and it's acting, you know, it's, you know, seeing how it goes, building the network, connecting with them, having follow-up conversations, you know, feeling like you're there worth your time and that, for your time or and money that you invested or your company invested for you to attend a conference or a training class or go to a networking group that you have

something to show for it. And, you know, when it's my time and my money, I want something, I want to return on that. And so, I'm intentionally looking for those first two people that I'm going to

follow up with after the event each and every time I go. So, you know, building community, strengthen your soul, like, lengthen your stool leg and strengthen your stool leg and create some balance and it kind of sits between work and life because it doesn't have to, your community doesn't have to be about just your personal life and it doesn't have to be just about your work life.

It can be about that. I love that. It is, it's a good point because some of my best, best, best team I met at a networking event that are my community, but they're like my family and when I need advice like you mentioned in the beginning, they're the people I call before I make, you know, different major decisions in my life or they talk me off my ledge for whatever I'm going to do next. So, thank you so much for being here, Diane. We really appreciate your insights and all your nuggets

that you shared with us today. Until next time, thank you for joining in Seconded Connect. You've been listening to the Executive Connect podcast. If you have questions or ideas on how to bring leadership to your next level, email us at ExecutiveConnectPodcast@gmail.com. And don't forget to subscribe so you can catch every new episode. Until next time.