Madame Web Review/Talkbacks - podcast episode cover

Madame Web Review/Talkbacks

Feb 16, 202421 min
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Episode description

JJ reviews the controversial Madame Web, plus your talkbacks from the red microphone button on the iHeart radio app

Transcript

This is the downbeat on ninety seven to one the freak. I think it's really stupid that the Rangers already at spring training. Shit, well, that's the price of playing until November, right, I guess. But even if they didn't go on the six week World Series run or whatever that was, would you rather not feel stupid and not have a World championship? No, You're probably gonna feel stupid no matter what you do, right, Kevin, No, I am. He's gonna feel great. I'm gonna feel terrible about

myself. You don't feel terrible. He didn't. He didn't think he did a very good job with his life spot a minute ago, and I thought he did XCEP. No, that one that was stupid. I think you should be proud of yourself. Dude. No, I'm not kidding too badass. You proved them all wrong, dude, damn sure. Do well. Then if I get there, then I'm a conceited individual, and then I'm

satisfied and there's no push for tomorrow. Not just Look. All I'm saying is if you wanted to play baseball and you told me you get two months off, no weekends, nine months on. Yeah, do you think Josh Spores is like, all right, yeah, it's the last pitch of the season. Then I saw video of him yesterday getting it cranked up. And why do pitchers and catchers have to get there early to stretch out? What is that to do it here? You don't have to go out there,

do it here? Yeah, do it on live video feed. Fine, they have to be there a week early, two weeks early. It's two weeks for two weeks to just soft toss kind or get it warmed up catchers because they got to bend down. Yeah, do you know sick? They are squatting? Well, they chose. If you're a catcher and you chose to be a catcher, you're nuts. Do you get I never played baseball growing up. Do you get does the catcher kind of like the dude can't

feel that good? Or is he the best? No, he's actually usually at an early age is one of the best. He's the aggressive nut though. He's the guy who's most likely to play middle linebacker. And you know it's that guy. I know he's They have to be smart and they have more jet tough, they have more jobs than most people on the field. The guy that's really like you know when you play soccer at the age of

seven, he's the guy that's always around the ball faster and better. Usually that's what the catcher was, and then you move them or it's the big kid. It's usually the big kid, right, That's what I'm saying, so immobile. Yes, as they get older, but younger it's like, yeah, it's the it's the athlete. I never saw that in the little league or pony league. Man, it was always the big kid that played catcher, and the athletes either pitched or played short and aren't even in the

big leagues. The catcher's body type is often just a little more husky. Well, you can't have a guy who sucks back there though too, he sucks, But why don't you ever see a super skinny catcher? Jonah him skinny, And maybe I just think he's more bulky than he is because I was tallwhere Sandy Alamar was like six or five right there still is Lord,

Yeah, he's actually getting smaller over the years. They stuck my ass out and right field really yeah, because there's no left handed batters and everybody pulled back then, So I never saw any action, did you pretty much? Oh? As when one came at you. I was horrible at baseball, just absolutely horrible. Ever played never a day. It was my sport of choice. I should have. I was a monster. The hand eye coordinations out of control? Is it? Yeah? Really? If I threw something,

you'd catch it. Oh yeah, I'm not gonna throw anything. But if I did us a hand eye coordination, have a decent golfer. Right, So throw a joke book at him and see if you can catch him. Yeah, read this. Yeah, here's all the jokes that used to be on all the jokes and try again Monday, all the jokes that used to be and didn't use morning news except that he got he quit doing them. I did. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought I was just wasting time. We got We're not wasting any time. We're not running out the

clock. People think we're running out the clock. You know, having a nice conversation about sports. What's wrong with that? That's what I'm saying. You played a lot of you played baseball a catcher. Where are you going to my career? Yeah? Okay, but did you like when he's heard so? Did you have the little that's how bad? Yeah? They didn't give you a little wedge things to put behind your knees. Yeah, but as you get older, you know you that's kind of like a beginner's thing,

like a kind of like a train wheels care. Yeah, I want a chair. I have bad knees. A little stool, a tiny stool. After a while, that's what it feels like. You're sitting like a little miss. Then you get older. Yeah, well that's what catchers now in baseball, they've gone to the one knee. Yeah, I need the catcher's tough it. Yeah, but the one knee is a problem. If there's a while pitch, you can't really who used to do the one leg out one of the paint Who's that sounds right? They still got to do

that lower pitch baseball opinions. Okay, let's get to the Madame web review Madam Webb, Dakota Johnson, Big budget, Sydney Sweeney Scott. Yeah, he plays I mean it's not a spoiler because it's on IMDb. He plays Ben Parker. Okay, kind of gives you an idea, Madam Webb.

This it takes place in the Spider Verse, so and this movie takes place specifically in two thousand and three, which is what interesting because we're trying to figure out now on the timeline where we are in the Spider Verse, because you know, when the Tobey Maguire movie came out, that Spider Man movie came out, I think it was two thousand and one two, so it's it's it's interesting on I really want to see where they were trying to place

this in the within the Spider Verse. But it's the origin story of Madame Webb. She's the order story that they use for this film is she was an orphan her you know, she's trying to figure out like what happened to her mom, and all of a sudden, like she kind of it's in the trailer she kind of dies and comes back and now she has she can see the future. So it's kind of like some scenes kind of somebody said, I saw it felt like Final Destination away because they like you know,

showed the scene that happens. It hasn't happened, but like it's on a loop. So she sees it and then she's like freaking out trying to figure out what's going on, and it's because of something that it's happened in the past or a mom and so now she's trying to figure all this out.

And now there's these three girls who come in that are tied in because they're connected in a way, and you know, obviously in the trailer they show they're they're all spider women in the all do they all have spider adjacent abilities? They don't in the movie because this is before she like, they're trying to figure out why they're all linked and tied together, but they they're they're

showing the costs. They're in their costumes in the trailer, so they show that, you know, they're spider women, and so they're the Yeah, they're part which is spied the Spider verse because there's multiple Spider Man So yeah, yeah, there there's a guy named is Zegel. Ezekiel was coming after him because he sees the future as well when he has some of these Spiders' abilities to and he's trying to kill them for a specific reason. Uh,

I'm not too sure that's in tailer, so I won't say why. So, yeah, it's it felt like they were really trying to keep this plot interesting and so if by doing that it made it messy, it sounds terrible. You've just described the place yeah, it had like I could see the potential. But the problem really is in the writing. These actors couldn't no matter how hard they that, they couldn't save the script. The script was

bad. Oh it was really bad. And I see why. I found out who there's screenwriters that were the names was Matt Szama and Burke Sharpless.

And somebody posted five of movies. If they've written all five of those movies don't even have above a thirty percent of rotten Tomatoes, how does anyone sign up to and they've already written and they written Morbius, which is arguably probably the worst Sony movie, Sony Marvel movie out there, and and it's just like, why do they keep getting screen screenwrights like to get to write these movies because they're terrible. But yeah, I mean I can name a few.

Dracula, I'm told, the Last Witch Hunter, Madam Webb Moribeitz, and then Gods of Egypt are the five movies that these two writers wrote together. None of them have above a thirty percent of riding Tomatos. And the fact that Marvel and Sony went to them and say, hey, write this coming up, this origin story of a new character, that people aren't even gonna know about, and you have to you gotta get views because you know, Marvel is struggling right now and we need Sony got you gotta save it,

and they give it to these guys. It's insane to me. I'm staying optimistic because I think if they can find the right people to get on board with this, I would love to see how they do the Spider Women in the future, because the Spider Verse has already opened up, you know this, and we're gonna start seeing more new characters. Especially we're in this phase in Marvel, so I don't know. There's no end credits. There's no you know in credits at all in this movie, which is rare for

a Marvel film. I don't think they wanted to. I think they didn't want to commit to these characters or commit to this storyline. Maybe they didn't have faith in it from the beginning. I don't know. It's and it feels like it was just doomed from the beginning. I don't I mean you can't. I won't blame Dakota Johnson, I won't blame Celesto Carnor. I want blame Sidney So I won't blame any of the actors in this movie. I think this movie was bombed from the get go, from this from the

writing. Oh no, I think they just the best they could one one, two, one point nine. I'll say I'm nice, I'll be nice. I'm not. Yeah, it's it was. Some people were like, oh, I just couldn't bear to watch. It's rare for me to find a movie where I just can't just bear to watch. I mean, it's rare, and I'm not saying that's what this is, but that's what I'm saying. That's why I'm not going to get it like less than I thought.

There's gonna be like four chicks running around and Spider Girl costumes, like shooting webs there. Yeah, they're in their costumes for like I think a total of three minutes. No, no, yeah, total three minutes. So Sidney Sweeney shooting unlimited webs out of her bra It was cool that it was, like I said, it was an origin story, so they really you know, it was from the beginning, it's before her powers came and YadA, YadA, YadA. But why didn't they sell out and just make

it a sex appeal movie? Just sell out? You know, don't be like that, Kevin. Yeah, he'll be that person, Kevin. I'm just saying this clearly didn't work. This deep, this deep origin story.

Oh that's getting killed too. So it was just it's it's really it started with the writing it was due, which is funny because Dacota Johnson actually said it was the script change, after which obviously they're gonna make changes and edits, you know, after she after she read the script and signed on, they changed the script, and I'm curious of what the script looked like beforehand. Tough day for press play. It's a total of like six and a

half dumplings and three films. Yeah, I mean, if you are obviously a Marvel fan and you're following the Marvel universe, obviously goes you know, I I'll say, go see it because who knows how it's gonna tie in later. I mean maybe going to fight out on Tuesday five, on our Tuesday, we'll just skip it all together, right, I'm planning to never see it. Yes, after this, okay, jo, I really need to Sydney Sweeney is a really phenomenal actress. Yeah, it was just no,

Uh, she's got a euphoria phenomenal hype raise. It's like Street Sweeney. I mean, there's a few in between. What we got talkie mop uh talkbacks. This is all brought to you by Advanced Hair Restoration. It's the home of the advance fue very next day, your own natural hair, same color, same curl. It's where you can leave us Advanced Hair Restoration feedback with the red microphone button on the iHeartRadio. And here we go,

hey boys, trying to help the community. So I turned my front yard into a full scale version of downtown Tokyo to try to attract that Godzilla from down in Crowley. So far, all we've attracted are two mangy dogs trying to take a bite out of almost a roy and a professor from UTD wearing a ski mask, just cranking ron to some book about lighters and minotaurs fighting

down in war. It's weird guy, but an incredible form. Well anyways, or fifty days away from WrestleMania, that's the showcase of the Immortals, Mike, I love your bonds Man Rody, incredible form going after Professor Folsom. He changed his front yard to look like Tokyo to attract Godzilla the two foot monitor, roughneck lizard from Crowley. All you attracted was dog mangy dogs and a ski masked guest of our Incredible but fifty Days of WrestleMania fifteen.

That's a milestone, cranking rod. He throws cranking rod. It's his face, my favorites, that's perfect favorite catchphrase. Now it's been one day. I'm getting sick beaten. Hey, and I'm starting to regret be in a horse bum bum But Hey, I like the freak. Hey, I think I like your feet. Hey, let's have foot intercourse. I don't even know what that is. I do. It's really pretty tribute to a beautiful song that we heard yesterday. It's tired. We're supposed to hear it again

today and we forgot. We can end the show with it. Hey, guys, it's been a great morning, I'd have to say so. I ain't been working too hard, but I've been putting these drinking fountains together, and well, boys, I hope I get to see you guys on the freaking show weekend. Maybe you guys will be at the movie from here on. Hey, February twenty seventh, with us Speak easy. I can't wait

to see you guys. You all have a good one. Yeah, Albert, it took me half of it. Brother full Tyrese Haliburton, their good job free Jesus. Yeah, I would love to sit in the bathtub full of cream corn while the Downbeat danced around, singing the theme song to Phineas and Ferb and throwing little pickles one day what that GUYE day? Good morning boys. You guys are doing a fantastic job. I hope you have a good weekend. Colin Kurt Busch, just sitting eating their morning cheerios listening to

the Freak KT comes in with a right hook out of nowhere. Why do you hate the Bush brothers? They got nothing to do with nine to eleven KT. That's someone totally different. Kevin Kevin well as a guy who used to work part time as a tour guy in Texas Motor Speedway. I don't know, it's still like a mother. They were winning a lot back then. Just felt like kind of they were always trying to fight, trying to fight people. Remember one time with the Fan we were interviewing one of those

guys. I think it was Kyle, Kurt Kyle or very ugly I know, right, I can help. That's another part of this. And he said something was said in an email by one of our coworkers and he like flipped him off, like on the air, but he like what he was kind of being funny, but it was also like serious. I feel like those guys were into their power dynamic at one point. And then wasn't it Kurt Busch who was speeding residentially? Like NASCAR guy, you don't need to

be driving one twenty three to go get milk. That's just mine. That's all it comes from. It stems from nothing, It stems from nothing. I wanted to take it to a gay bar war Electric six rules. Thank you, Dick Valentine. That was awesome. I would love to be the average sized meat between a Danny Bayless and Mike sroy Sandwich. By the way, I'm a horse. I don't understand him. You've made a massive impression with the horse. It's a cult classic already. Yeah, it's all people

are talking about. Heard it across the metro verse. This is the response Mick Kreamer was looking for. It's a viral hit. Well that was our yeah, but he was an established artist. This is just a singing piece of chocolate, little speaker, it's got it. I do have it all right, But before we do that, it's not the leak of your auburn head. It's not the crook up your smile. It's not the whispers you speak in my ears. It's not your elegant style. It's not the way

that you hold my hand. It's not your kisses in hume. Let me be perfectly honest, it's your jugs. I dedicate that song to Gabby, Thank you for listening. Gabby Rooner with a little brown drink tink tinking around in his hand, just on stage. It's like Michael Boublay on acid and it's beautiful with a punchline. It's not the crook of your smile, the cook of it. That's what the Walt singer. I like the fact that that singer was honest the way you know we've all been there. It's none

of those things. So perfectly honest. Let's get back real quick. The Daytona five hundred bet just so we all need to write now. Yeah, Mike has, Brad Keselowski, Kyle Busch and Kyle Larson. Yeah, Danny Has, Denny Hamlin, Chase Elliott, Ty Gibbs. I have Joey Logano, Ryan Blaney, and Bubba Wallace and we will add up your finishing positions. Yep. So if it's one, ten and eleven, that would be twenty two. Whoever's got the highest total number is your loser. Has to

wear a shirt that Mike is ordered all No, not next week. I won't be here for another week. Okay. You have to wear the same T shirt every day for a week. Yeah, I want T shirt weather, so it's bad. And you have to make full effort and draw the most beautiful picture you can of Bill Elliott and give it to the winner. And you have to retweet three tweets during whatever payoff week is probably week after next, and you can only write wood smash and then just see where that

goes thrice in a week. Kyle Busch and Kyle Larson for you, Mike, I don't huh, I don't really know. Yeah, okay, Kyle Busch, Kyle Larson, Brad Keslowski. We'll be back at six am. See if Luca is your All Star game MVP, all that other stuff, and we'll have a big show with the downbeat President's dayson. We might not be working but we will be here all right, doing many of the speakers. I think we'll be playing the Lucas seventy three point game on Monday at

two pm, hoasted by Coop and Kevin Gray. But the downbeat is going to send you off with the very cult classic weird song healthy as a Horse. Wait, that's not the one with the lyrics. You did this the other day too. Well, I have a lot of things that I have opened on my file. I am concerned. I'm here. It is everyone relaxed. Everyone just shut up and relax. It's happening now. Every yo. Sex is overrated. I just masturbted, and now I'm feeling healthy as

a horse. Love is overrated. It just makes you frustrated. And now I'm feeling happy as a horse. So that's when I decided to walk on all fours and try it. And now I'm turning into a horse. I'm eating Hey for dinner. A future triple Crown winner. I posted online that I'm now a horse farmaro Saint Biscuits. I'm a thoroughbred king Smarty Jones, black beauty. They will hear me sing, mister red bow tech horsemen. They were on TV Secretariat Seattle, slew got nothing on me. Sets is

over rated. I just masturbated and now I'm feeling healthy as a horse.

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