8am Hour - Clean Up Aisle Dave

Okay, there you go. You asked for it, little air horn boy on kd wub. All right, everybody, mixtape game with our special guest host today, Santa. Oh, Merry Christmas everyone, Santa, thanks for coming in. Busy time up at the poll then, I'm gonna guess.

It is so busy up there. We're making a bunch of toys. About six or seven new toys this year. Wow, yes, about six or seven new toys. That's about it, but very busy. I brought you all some gifts as well. What you bring, Santa, Dave, here's a.

Brand new magic trip.

Now it's gone. There it is, now it's gone. You did it.

Perfect new dog toys for your new puppy.

You Santa, You're so for me.

Actually sorry, the dog toys this here, sorry, Vaughan Santa. Yeah, yeah, here, I got you season tickets to the Gothree.

Jenny.

Now you know the song he sees you when you're sleeping.

Okay, so that's real.

Let me explain this.

Yeh, fabrize.

Way too much?

Yeah girl, yeah, but Rudolph can't even detect your home anymore.

So Jennifer, please clear the air.

Though you've been very good. Just very gassy.

We know you're very busy this time of the year, making your list and checking it twice and and going to the mall and things like that, so we appreciate you. We're gonna play a little game of the mixtape game, and I understand that you've come up with some categories that we need to fulfill with ap appropriate, so you're exactly right.

Here we go. Let's do the first song.

It's December here in the North Pole and you are one of my elves. You're making toys and having a great time, knowing that Christmas is just around the corner.

But then you find out the toy counter is off.

You have to speed and make toys next week at double speed. What song plays as you frantically make the toys?

Who would you like to go first?

Who would you want me to go first?

Well, bases right here?

Jingle bells la la, Oh my gosh, Santa the toy counter. Don't worry, Santa, I'll get it done for you, and at super speed.

Okay, made to wait to kick it off? Nice? All right?

Who's Sanna?

Let's go to font All right, Well, I don't know what Santa's up to.

While we're busy working hard in the factory, probably smoking a cigar outside with Frosty. But Bernard, that Elf and I we look at each other and we're ready to lock in. So we strap up our timblin boots, tighten my elf hat, crack my knuckles because.

We've got to work.

Hammer the train sets, tick of the Barbie doll houses.

We're just going harder, better, faster, stronger.

Come on, Bernard, all right, we're getting the toys in. We're getting the toys in.

Get nailer right, somebody, anybody nice.

Man, Santa, guess what we save Christmas?

Yes, we did, Thank you, mister Vaughan. Let's I think go to Dave.

Santa, thank you very much. By the way, this is if I were a little Elf, I'd be there with all you know, a girl Elf, and I'd be abe there with all the girl Elves and we'd crank up this song because we're gonna work hard for the toys. Double speed Santa, a little cardio. We're bringing out toy trains, Yo yos and Nintendo switch to.

Now.

We'll get it done for you, Santa, because we love you and we work hard for the toys. Thank you very much. Merry Christmas, Hannah, Very.

Christmas, David, that's very nice.

All right.

Will you read the scenario one more time?

Oh, of course I will.

It's December here in the North Pool and you are one of my elves. You're making toys and having a great time, knowing that Christmas is just around the corner. But then you find out that the toy cover is off. You have to speed next week, making toys at double speed.

What song plays as you frantically make toys?

Santa and I are very close.

I am his sassy alf I go by the name of Zazzi, and Zazzi knows that if she wasn't on her SSRIs called Sir Traleine, she would be stressed out right now.

But because she is on that, she's actually taking this day by day.

And she throws on her sunglasses, pops a sing in her mouth, and she starts playing this song knowing she's.

Gonna make it happen. We'll get it figured out, Sanna, We're gonna make it work.

You're way behind Jenny.

That's okay, Skywalker in this lego set, that's all right. They can use their imagination. There's gonna be a couple of toys that don't come out the way they're supposed to.

Be a dentist, Sanna, you have a big decision to make, Sannah.

Yes, yes, this was interesting.

Let me tell you that.

Well, first we're just gonna take these two out of the way.

But Jenny, you are.

Okay, Well, it's down to these two.

They were both good this year. Oh boy, Sannah, their scenarios were right.

But Bailey, she popped the Xanax and took some speed and all at the same time.

This is the speed we need to make the toys.

I would agree with you, Santa, she didn't really really really want to, okay. Scenario number two it is the mixtape game special guest in the studio, Santa Clause. Do you know what Jenny put on her Christmas list this year? Because Jenny's probably put something very interesting on her Christmas list this year, Yes, she did.

She put a couple of things. One boob, sweat cream Claus, what the heck is this? I had no idea what that was. You know, some other things that we're just not gonna talk about on the radio.

Batteries included her batteries not included. I brought it all right, n alright, let's do round two of the mikestape game. Santa.

All right, it's Christmas morning.

You're ten years old, and you sprint downstairs in your pajamas.

Your heart is pounding.

As you fly underneath the tree, wrapping paper flies, boxes open, and then you freeze socks, every single gift of socks, stripe socks, fuzzy socks, socks.

With reindeer wearing glasses. By the time you open up your.

Tenth pair of the excitement is gone, the reality is set.

In, and this song plays.

We're gonna start here with Jennifer.

Okay, So, as a ten year old, I was grateful for gifts. However, I am one who cannot with holes showing emotion. So I am very sad. Imagine a cartoon character as their eyes are getting big and the tears are welling up, and I'm like, wow, Sanna didn't know anything about me this year, And as that sorrys as the tears are falling down my face, this song place.

Not anymore.

You know, I wanted to polypocket. It's not my Christmas.

I'm sorry, Jenny, Yeah.

Oh, Jennifer.

Somebody texted and said, why does Santa sound like Georgie from It, Santa came down in the sewers.

That was once.

David.

Okay, I'm ready. So it's all socks and and and I want socks, I want to Nintendo switch to and I want a Lego Star Wars Millennium Falcon. And I didn't get any of that. I'm done. I am dun done with the parents. I'm going into mom's nightstand. I'm gonna get out some weed. I'm ten years old. It's time to start to go into the kitchen and get some juice. I'm not gonna have just juice. I'm gonna get gin and juice. And this song plays and I'm just saying half all y'all, I don't care, You're don't care,

This is because of you, good to be fair Santa.

Mom was feeding little Dave Ryan hot toddies when he was a little boy at a pretty young age.

So this this does that of a true.

Story, true story happen I'll make my own joy on Christmas morning, Santa A rack Vought.

Yes, keep me the scenario against Anta.

Yes I can.

It's Christmas morning, You're ten years old, and you sprint downstairs in your pajamas.

Heart is pounding.

You fly underneath the tree, rapping paper, flies, boxes open, and then when you freeze socks, every single gift of socks, stripe socks, fuzzy socks, socks with reindeers wearing sunglasses.

By the time you open up.

Your tenth pair, the excitement is gone, reality is set in and this song plays.

It's so tragic.

All I've been waiting for all month is to jump on my pogo stick that I've been begging for for years, and to sit and play Mario on my Nintendo DS.

Just for socks. Socks. I mean, there's one pair of chicken and waffles on it that's cute.

But as it settles in, so does my disappointment, and I can't hide my face.

I start patting my lip, kicking invisible.

He just got the wrong attitude. He's gotta be like.

It's my Turnity then turn sucks.

I mean, I won't have any fun, but I know this Christmas I'll at least be warm all these socks.

I's gotta go down my road here seeing you gotta just change your adage goes, I'm under the tree with a little tropicana, seagrums, secrets and moms.

Hell yeah, got it.

The mom's dash, dad seagrums, and I found some tropicana in the fridge. Okay, all right, miss.

Bailey, what do you have for well?

Ten pairs of socks that reality really hurts, hurts hard, and the song plays.

Hello Darkness, Smile friend, Bailey, It's fine. I've come to talk with you. That's all I wanted.

I love socks because I didn't want a new Dolly or.

I just wanted socks.

I'm gonna go upstairs and come over with juice.

Baby, here we go. Here you go, have some secrets. One one tope, one little tope, Bailey, come on, little do it? Ten year old Bailey, Come on, you're gonna feel better.

Santsa Dave's being naughty.

Yeah, well, just to let you guys in on a little something. Santa was naughty once, and he also sipped on some juice.

Yes, I made it into the North Pool jail once, dear, and I also was naughty, please be easy on David.

All right, well, these were definitely some interesting songs this morning. They're all pretty good, but you know what, there is one that just topped the caked on the one that made me feel sympathy and cried deep inside because.

No child should get socks.

Nope, was ba Now it's fine.

I wanted.

Hey, I guess I'm gonna put them on.

You did imaginary dolls that I didn't get this year, and you.

And I'm just gonna go laid out o my house.

You're gonna be a whole lot happier at my house. Bailey, you come on over, suck for.

A little something else.

You're not wrong. Give it for Santa everyone.

Santa Christmas, everyone, Mary Chris.

All I want next year is just ron.

It sounds good, This sounds good.

Not gonna happen, Santa Merry, Christmas will be right back. I'm k d w B with Jonahmurray tickets. We got Joana Murray tickets for the show coming up on December twenty seventh. The Green Room will do those. And we

The lights are turned the way down low. Let us know, let us know, let us know, the lights are turned.

Way down low.

Let it know, let it lop wrong. You'd said three, let it know. We're gonna fin You did so good.

Now, the way it works is that we're gonna get you tickets to go see Joonan Murray. Get you out of the house. After the couple of days after Christmas. He'll be like, oh, what are we gonna do now? Oh Christmas is boo. Get you out of the house, Go see Jonah Murray perform at the Green Room and call me now if you want to. If we're gonna give you an easy Christmas song, you get to finish the lyric. Now you're gonna go see Jonah Mourray. So if you love Jonah Murray, call me now. Six five

Christmas this year.

To save me from fear to tears, I'll give it to someone special.

Okay, that's the way the game works. Six five one nine eight nine. Katie will be for Joan Murray tickets. Finish the lyric and we'll get you the tickets up by the way. While we're waiting, give a shout out to Stephanie from your husband Orlando. It is her thirty first birthday and the first day of her big break because she's a teacher.

Oh my god, I think all teachers have like two weeks off now, so starting next week, nobody's in school.

Yeah, they need it.

Take notes. Yeah. We will be here until Tuesday and then we are off. We do have somebody on the phone for the Christmas finish the lyric. It is Tanya. Hi, Tanya, are you all ready for Christmas?

Tanya?

Oh gosh, I hope.

So okay, have you bought for everybody? No? No, so you're not really ready at all that? Okay, okay, good, tree is up? Did you put a tree up?

Yes?

Okay, good, all right, you're on your way, Tanya're gonna play a song for you. You finish the lyric and you must do your best to sing it. And if you do, you're gonna go see Jonah Murray. You're ready.

Oh you you got this.

It's a childhood classic.

And here we go.

Used to laugh, them call him names.

They never let bull Rudo join in any rainier game.

Could it be an easier come on, seriously, gay, okay, I'm gonna give you a harder one. You do win, by the way, that's that's kind of a gimme if you didn't know that when you would have to cancel Christmas, Tanya, you're a winner. Congratulations, Merry Christmas. Murder Olivia Dean on kd WB. It is still very cold. It is four degrees. We're kind of up and down, up and down, up and down. No, it is gross, but you know it is.

I know I am.

I am happy about the white Christmas. I wasn't happy. When it was forty degrees the other day. That was lovely, but then yesterday everyone's like, don't go out, the roads are bad.

I just drove slow. I was fine.

It is icy.

It was icy this morning for me coming in and I know someone had texted in and being like how are the roads?

But it was not great.

And when I talked to Brandon from College Muscle Movers, who delivers all our Christmas bushes, I was like, how are you doing out there?

He's like, it's an icy one today.

So I don't know if you've drove yet, but probably drive a little bit careful. My entire back alleyway fawed and then became a puddle.

Right And then yeah, so I want to shovel.

Last night at like nine thirty because I whatever didn't want to have to deal with it this morning.

And I was just shoveling over ice the whole time. And I know this is great.

I know, I'm nope struggling.

You know, our down down spouted water all over the driveway, which then froze up. There's kids playing hockey on my driveway this morning when they left for work. Yeah, it's crazy.

He's got new tires.

I'm gonna ask that.

Oh, let me tell you, today probably would have been a real bad day for me to have those new tires, because I still slid a teeny bit this morning with those new tires.

How old were your old tires? Because they looked bad? You did like a before and after.

Yeah, they were the O G tires And I got my car five.

You're so bad.

My girlfriend Alyssa also probably that same situation where sall we get new tires for her Monday. But when I was in Jersey last week, she was like, I'm just taking your car. Your car's got new tires. I think my car has snow mode all wheel drive. God bless you.

If you're driving with Jenny Tors.

It's the last weekend before Christmas, so there's a couple of things that are going on. Let me pass some things that are going on for you if you want to get out and do something kind of different. Usually Stephanie comes in this time of the day, at this time of the week and tells him some things that are going on. And she's got she's on full on mom Patrol's on vacation. Yeah, so she's got stuff going on. So, uh, winter app Winter Applis Windows Wonderland is at the Marquette.

Was it good? Beal like, I seen a lot of friends going to see it already.

Yeah, it was good. I really liked it.

There's something going on at the State Fairgrounds. It is called the Minnesota Mary Market Final Weekend at Minnesota State Fairgrounds at the Union Depot in Saint Paul. European Christmas Market Final Weekend Miracle at Big Rock. Talk to me about this one. I've never been before, but I know it's a big deal.

I don't I've never been either, but I think it's in Wisconsin, and I have heard from a lot of people that it's super super fun. One thing all through out there is I did the Glow Festival at chs Field last weekend and that was so fun too. They've got like a you know, like this giant slide at the State Fair. Well they have the snow version of that.

Yeah, down it.

You can get some hot coco, a little rum shata in there if you want. But that was fun.

Miracle big Rock is it Saint Croix Falls, Wisconsin's a drive through or walk through tour of over twenty five million Christmas lights and seventeen themed areas, including Miracle Moon and a bunch of other places to go to. Miracle at Big Miracle at big Rock dot com. Yeah, they spelled it wrong, but I'm sure it's Miracle at big Rock dot Com. The Vikings plan on losing this Sunday, so that'll be pretty They're pretty cool to do well.

I don't know what it means that they should lose the rest of the season. They I mean the highlight I think is going to be on Christmas when Snoop performs at half halftime.

For that, you are looking forward to that?

I am looking for to because the Vikings are playing on Christmas Day? Aren't they play the Lions? Okay, gotcha?

This seemed to be a lot of NFL teams. There's not very many. I feel like we talked about the same like five.

There's only you don't talk about the New York Giants because they're not worth talking.

About that and they're not in our conference. No, I don't care about those ones.

Right, What did you saying?

I honestly, I honestly thought you said Beagles. Really said Beagles. That's my favorite team, the Beagles. Legal, let's do the dirt on k WB. Brought to you by six one two Injured Heimer and Lammer's Injury Law. Now this was I'm gonna play a little bit because this was one of the craziest two point conversions ever on Thursday Night football. I heard Carson downstairs screaming during this at about ten thirty last night. So during the game versus the Rams

And into a lot of traffic and incomplete terry.

What do you see on this play here?

Oh, this may be a backward pass. We need to get a good angle on it. But if it's.

Backward, then then this recovery in the clear and continuing action in the end zone would be a good two point conversion with.

Seattle after reviewing the play, the quarterback through a backward path with the recovered in the end zone.

By the author into trafficial conversion.

That is.

The craziest ever, craziest ever.

I know. If you're not a big football fan, that was meaningless to you, But that was pretty crazy. If you're a football fan, go look at the audio or the video of that, because it is pretty crazy.

Variety Is that a magazine rank? So they do something a website? Yeah, yeah, they do something called Actors on Actors, and so Jennifer Lawrence recently interviewed Leo A. Leonardo DiCaprio, and here's a little audio of their interview.

Have you rewatched Titan No? Oh you should, I haven't seen it. I bet you could.

I bet you could, like watch it as a movie now, and it's so good.

I don't really watch Maybe I do some movies I've watched, you watch your old your movies.

No, I've never made something like Idanic, but if I did.

I would, I would watch it.

But I mean, do you put when was the last time you did that?

When I was.

Really drunk, I put on American Hustle.

And then my assistant went to download something.

Would you do it alone or were you showing some.

Showing people this movie?

No, I was drunk, and I was like, I wonder if I'm good at acting, you might put on American Muscle And I don't remember what the what the.

I like what?

I'm gonna have them cut that out, all right? For sure? One club.

I like what she said at the beginning where she's like, you could watch it now and watch it as a movie, because you think that, like as an actor, you're so infiltrated as like an actor that you can't watch that back right away and not think about like everything that went into it.

You don't see it as a movie.

Yeah, you don't does a movie.

You just analyze your acting skills in it and you think about what happened with this scene and how many takes it took. But anyway, so I thought that was funny that Leo's like, no, I don't watch my movie.

I've heard artists say that too. They don't listen to their own music a lot of the time because they remember. They don't appreciate the music. They remember who fought with whom in the studio, how the producer you know, got sick and threw up in the trash can, how the guitar didn't work, whatever, and they don't appreciate it as music because they don't remember. They remember the experience of making it, not the product of making it.

People were more proud of themselves than for stuff that they do, because sometimes we'll like do a whole show and I'll be like, that was a good show, and I'll go back and listen.

To it and go, that was funny. I just I we're proud of me.

Yeah, I'll be proud.

It's just something I know what's gonna happen, you know, And I'm thinking about everything before, Like how anxious I was before we.

Did like a Vonstar's a pot or something.

So you do get anxious before flusters, get anxious before everything.

No, oh, I was gonna say, I would have never guessed that you do.

If you do, it's hard to getting canceled every day, Jenny, I suppose it distressful.

Huh oh, Jelly Roll.

When he was seventeen, he was convicted of armed robbery, and when he was twenty three, he was convicted of drug possession. But now he's been pardoned by the Tennessee Governor Bill Lee for his crimes.

So he's got a clean bill of crime. Now, why would your name your kid, Bill Lee?

Billy William Lee.

Arianna Grande was doing an interview on Seth Myers and she's talking about the Christmas tradition that she has with her family.

We make zapela.

I don't know if you know. It's like zeppeline people call them.

I don't know.

We call it zapela. And my my Knownah just passed in June and that was like our favorite thing to do is make the zapel as with her. My mission this year is to come up with a plant based zapela.

Oh wow, yes, she.

Would not like that.

What is.

Won't Actually she's also talking about how her mom went over the top collecting wicked collectibles.

Well, first of all, my mom everything, Oh godcha.

Hello.

Well, first of all, my mom has everything?

Oh gotcha?

Well my mom be like deeply in debt if.

She has everything.

No, no, no, she really she went a little too hard. And I was like, Mom, it's okay, universal, they're gonna send it.

It's okay.

And she'd be like.

No, no, no, no, no, I need like thirty and I was like, okay.

Perfect, that's funny.

She just went out and bought the whole target.

Still so proud. Yeah. They were talking about the most annoying songs of twenty twenty five, and the tie at number one was both Sabrina Carpenter songs. I'll play the lesser known one first, the Tide for number one. Most annoying song of the year, you.

Know, sugar talkas.

But number one, well tied for number one is this song air by No.

I don't see where either those are annoying.

I don't find them annoying. I don't. They said that it was like, you know, repetitive or bad harmony or something like that. I don't know.

Oh yeah, it says that they ranked them based on repetitiveness. Filler lyrics like yeah, I'm in law, high frequencies and harmonic dullness.

Oh but I like harmonic dullness. I like it.

Nicki Glazer is feuding with Amy Schumer.

Apparently a source told the not always reliable British tabloids that all of a sudden, Nikki said that Amy became very woke, in the sense that you couldn't say anything in front of her without her getting offended, and so they just don't like each other's stuff anymore. And then another source said they stopped being close because Amy got weird. Apparently, Nicki Laser is like very much more in the spotlight right now, so maybe Amy has gotten a.

Little bit we I've never found what Amy Schumer. Yeah, okay, okay, I was thinking of Amy Pohlar. Okay, yeah, Amy Schumer's funny, but yeah, I can see her being like, you know, very sensitive because Nikki Laser is filthy and disgusting. I mean, I just couldn't. I've never heard of her before the Tom Brady Rose and now I'm like her biggest fan because she's my kind of humor, like shocking, disgusting and offensive.

I have to say so.

The survivor finale was Wednesday night, and so they were promoting what is she hosting the Golden Globes. Yeah, right, So she did a commercial hosting the Golden talking about hosting the Golden Globes, and she was like, oh, Jeff gave me this immunity idol where I can pick one celebrity that I'm not going to make fun of this year.

So she goes through a couple people.

She said, I'm gonna text j Lo and say that I'm not gonna make fun of her. Oh, she blocked me. I'm gonna text so and so. Oh they blocked me. Oh jay Leno just texting me, block.

Jay Leno. Okay, that's funny.

Pete Davidson is a dad.

He and his girlfriend Elsie Hewitt just had their baby.

It's a girl.

She was born on the twelfth.

Her name is Scottie Rose Davidson and she's named after Pete Davidson's dad, who was a firefighter who died during September eleventh Terrist attack.

Yeah, I had no I knew that. Yeah, his dad died on nine to eleven.

Is horrible, wild And speaking of Pete Davidson, this is messy Tomorrow Night Ariana Grande is going to be hosting Saturday Night Live, and I'm excited because it's the holiday episode. Share of the musical guests, so you know she's gonna do love that song.

All right. That is the Dirt brought to you by six one two, Injured Heimer and Lammer's Injury Law, and we'll be back in a minute. On Katie wb Let's She Watch coming up here. Oh, you got to hear this one. It's a woman who tried her best to get rid of a guy, but what the link? She guy was too clingy and he was just She's like, you got to leave me alone. He's like, no, I love you, I am serious about you, and she's like, you are too clingy. So she went to an extreme