Hello the Internet, and welcome to this special year end episode of Ally's Geist.
I was gonna do an ad lib there.
I was trying to think of what was a like a year end thing, but I didn't know how to do.
All old, all acquaint and be for you know the words?
No one knows the words?
How do you know the words for all the part?
Anyone knows?
I don't even know that part. I don't think that's right.
It's something something acquaintance.
But you forgot out of me? What he said? All but what but we broke acquaintance be forgot? Let's see is that the lyric? Should old acquaintance be forgot? All acquaintance? Ship all? I don't know ship all? About the song? And what is an old lay zion? I know we must. Let's just admit this song's trash doo dooo what it's It's a Scottish song. Uh yeah. It's often heard at funerals and graduations. See it.
Probably it had more meaning before Americas just started screaming a drunk.
It makes a lot more sense at funerals.
Oh. This song poses a rhetorical question, is it right for old times to be forgotten? The answer is generally interpreted as a call to remember long standing friendships.
All right, so don't know what an old lady sweet way to say goodbye to the year and hold out to the new year. Oh, the war crimes we forgot? Hey, hey, hey, hey, we we're against those now. We're against those now who did them? Don't worry about it? What party are the context matters? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is a podcast where you take a deep dive into america shared consciousness and for the end of the year, we like to dive into the year that was and ask the question for should.
All old acquaintance be forgot? When those acquaintance are news stories that tortured our soul. My name is Jack O'Brien and I'm thrilled to be joined as always by my co host, mister Miles. Yes, yes, thank you so much, Thank you so much. I am still in a bathrobe.
I considered recording this laying down to give people the energy as the energy that you will.
You can you can't. I can't hear that. You can hear what I'm laying out, you can tell you I can hear when when. When Jack is reading a really brutal story, he starts clutching his face and hand, just like, oh God, God, God.
What definitely here that you be laying down?
Yeah, it's this okay, lay down challenge. We'll see if you hear me next time.
The sea on the side of my face. We're joined by the man behind the zoom chat from parts unknown. He's been called the Silent Majority. What a weird nickname to give yourself.
Right, having an off day that day, you don't have to call me. I won't quit, I won't quit, don't quit quick making threats.
And stop, won't stop? All right? So this is where we are counting down the top fifteen stories of the year. Fifteen through eleven. A bunch of fucking bangers. Yeah, dude. We got the Gorilla Verse Man Gorillas Verse Man yep. That was eleven. We got My Name is Chad? That was You're going all out order? That was thirteen. We got the Sandwich Assassin that was fourteen. We got La Boo Boo fifty and twelve the widow Our Did we do that? Did we do it in that order? Anyways? No? No? Yeah?
So this is this is where we count down the top stories of the year. How are we ranking them? Are they the best stories, our favorite, yeah sure, bringing them by annoyance.
We ranked them in a similar methodology to how FIFA gives out the Peace Award, and that you won't really know, and it's kind of us and our It's.
Like, you know, time man of the Year, where people are like, do they like Hitler? It's like, I don't know, is just the man of the year. A lot of people are talking about this Hitler. Humh Yeah, people gotta say number one, number one with a bullet. No, these are just the stories that gave us the most joy or pain one of the two. Not so not. We we tried to. We did say, like in the last episode, we tried to in Pain, Sunshine and Rain singer too much.
I think we wanted to avoid the real, real heavy ship. Yeah yeah, I said so much sundowning. Oh yeah, the sun.
Down and pain, Trump Sundown and Rain.
Okay, all right, and we might get to that in this in this countdoxt this very episode. It's it's entirely possible. Although I think Brian was talking about me when you talked about Sundown.
No, this is just this the sundown episode, the.
Sundown it is this does always feel like the part the time the year, because we're doing three days at this point, no longer the two, which we said too few recordings. We're adding a third recording every day. And you may notice that at this time of year, words start getting left out, words start getting added in our limit. Huh. Yeah, we're a little bit more incoherent. So if you ever wanted to know what it was like to hear us record drunk, this is like, you know, it's.
Like recalling all all of this ship that happened over the We're.
Old story, it happened this year.
Yeah, because so much boofy shit happens.
In a year. And I'm going to say, we've been going back through these, I've been like, okay, and this one I think happened in back in February, and then you go back and it's like September. Yeah, so there might be a bunch of stories we're leaving out from the beginning of the year. But guess what. That's what time does. Time's the best editor. It cuts out all the riff raft. So we got a couple of bankers bangars from the early part of the year. I think
our number one is from the early part of the year. Yeah, but yeah, a lot of more recent ones. We're gonna start off with an honorable Menshi didn't make the Top fifteen. Just just the keep trying, keep trying though the team. The selection committee was like, god, love, we'd love to include them, love to include Taylor Swift and Travis Kelcey in our top fifteen. Yeah, superducer Victor is demanding a recount. Okay, well he just broke a window with the fuck Victor
settled in. Yeah, that's your own house, dude, I gotta pay for that. This was big news when Taylor Swift announced her engagement to human Oak Tree Travis Kelcey, and people were, you know, mad and happy for the various reasons that people get mad and happy about every Taylor Swift piece of news. My main thing with this one was the way that the right respond to this immediately being like, oh, he's gonna put a baby in her Yeah.
Ben Shah Ben Shapiro, in his everlasting quest to like have mainstream cultural relevancy, couldn't get that FYC, couldn't get that four year consideration campaign to give him a nomination for the Golden Globes, despite wearing very cool sunglasses at the end of the year wage jacket. Jacket. Yeah, he said, this is on ironically an excellent thing. Oh god, I
hope many other single people follow their example. And then Charlie Kirk back to date this one a little bit, okay, founder of Turning Point USA, said he hoped Swift and Kelsey have lots of kids and end up very happy. I hope you end up very happy. Who says? I hope you end up happy like Taylor Swift might go from a cat lady to a JD Vance supporter, and we should celebrate that. We should have more children than she has houses, or she should have more children than
she has houses. Okay. He implored her to reject feminism, adding, submit to your husband, Taylor, you are not in charge, oh boy.
And yet look at them no, nowhere, nowhere near pregnant gregnant?
Yeah, what's wrong? You are keeping close tabs on that month? I am, I do? They haven't been married yet, they're not together as man and wife.
You're trying, then you're not really about that ship then, dude, right, you should be having a baby out of wedlock.
Dude, I don't know what, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, you should just be singing songs. I would actually not be surprised if they haven't had sex, because that album that she released where she has like songs about how good his penises, Yeah, how that would work? How just like heroic and wonderful his penises like that? That's so horny. It's almost like, I don't know, I think this is the benefit of a long distance relationship. Maybe is that she's just.
Like are do people blame her for the Chiefs not doing well this season? Like has that boomerang come.
Around well last season? Like better than they had any right doing last season? I feel like people probably can't quite blame them. I think did they win a championship with her in the picture? I forget like when they got together, But I don't even know. I wish anyways, they are having a tough they're having a tough go
of it more we feel very sorry for them. But yeah, I just it's wild that the right is so hungry for a like media win and media relevancy that they are trying to draft Taylor Swift's unborn children onto their team.
They to yeah, yeah, it doesn't feel very racial draft like any other rich white children running around.
Yeah, but they're not.
Fucking cool like if Sydney Sweeney hooked or something Apple Apple Martin, Apple Martin, Yeah, yeah.
No, dude, she's she's like all already and ship yeah shake her.
Debut and Antifa. Yeah, you're right.
What was your what was your dream? Your wish? Casting for the right, it was sweet like Chuck late L or some UFC fighter. They'd be like, yes, exactly.
She's just pregnant with a black eye all the time, the baby blacky.
Everyone, I don't know what.
Yeah, yeah, I feel like that's what they want.
Genetic. Yeah, all right, onto the actual number ten on our list, and we're cracking the top ten. Hold onto your butts, folks, because it is Pete Haig Seth. In a few short months, maybe even one month, went from calling all the generals together for what a lot of people were worried was going to be, like we're starting World War three, boys, we're taking it back. It's retro. It's cool, we're going to do it, and instead he just like gave a long rambling speech. Actually it was
like it wasn't rambling. I shouldn't say that. It was a long, very practice speech, including pauses for laughter and collapse and for like uproarious applause that just were filled with room tone and silence is like the buzzing of the av equipment.
Yeah, all the crickets even died.
Yeah, the crickets all killed themselves at the first five minutes of his speech. And I don't know why I get. I guess like, when you're kind of drunk and flying off of whatever he's on, you're not doing a lot of like what would the audience think? You know, that pure impulse. And so he's up there giving a speech about how his audience are all fat fucks, like fat jobs, and then he's expecting them to be like, yeah.
He's definitely like he was middling even when he was enlisted, you know what I mean, And now I think all those people like this guy sucks, and now he's dictating to us the policies are of the Department of War.
He definitely like yeah. It was always like, there's not going to.
Be women because they're weak, bro, you know what I mean, Like they got to get out of here too.
It's just gonna be bro vers, bro, you know what I mean. And we can use.
Slurs, we can fucking assault people like violently, you know what I mean, because that's how we're going to harden the soldiers. Yeah, it was a very fucking I think what start off as terrifying because you're like, oh my god, why is every like you know, a higher up officer
in the military being summoned to one place? Is this a purge or an announcement of some like crazy military campaign, And like, oh, it's worse because it's this moron who's doing a raw ross speech that went absolutely nowhere.
Yeah, but also not quite as bad because it does seem like everybody fucking hates him and that the kind of gon is like not you know, not on board. Depends on what day. He did help with morale though, when he uh proceeded soon after that to kill a boat full of people, not the first time that that happened, and that's.
No at the bottom of this, people like close to one hundred people have been killed so far with all these quote unquote narco terrorist boat strikes.
Yeah, they followed a boat and were like those look like drug people. I know a drug person when I see it you And from his speech to the Pentacon you could tell that he's always right about these sorts of things. And then they shot the boat with a missile exploded it from front to bad. The whole thing was a ball of flame, and then there were two people clinging to debris. And then he ordered that they go back and kill those people, which was pretty clear cut war crime.
And no, that's not what I said. I said kill them all and don't leave any life. He decided to go back. I just said kill them all, kill them all.
Yeah, yeah, and then he he proceeded to consolidate his grass up on all these generals by throwing an admiral who was taking orders from him completely under the buff as Miles reference, not a good look.
What's so disorienting about the boat strike story is just the inconsistent application of the definition of war crime. Maybe yeah, just like it is so fucking convenient that it's like, well, I don't like heg seth. So that's that's any other war crimes that were committed under our watch. It depends on if I like the guy or if I can use it like rhetorically.
Otherwise, you know, fame flexible.
Most of the term narco terrorism because to me, the biggest narco terrorists are the United States government. Sure, they've waged so much terrorism on their own people and never admit it that it was a thing. So that's nice progress.
I mean, we were released some files that kind of implied that, but I'm not gonna admit it.
Yeah. Wow, it's kind of the gist there.
But yeah, that's what's always really fucking like every time I hear that, it's it's really disorienting, and that's a war crime and that should not happen. And you're like, please review all of the policies of the United States if we're being serious here.
Yeah, but definitely shouldn't. And yeah, great, welcome to the team. Brother, glad you're noticing this for the first time. Should apply across the board. But hey, it is a bit like people being like, I don't like Donald Trump because he doesn't even try to get away with it. He just does the thing and doesn't he not even a good liar. Yeah, we used to have to try. That's the main thing. That's my main issue is the decorum.
Oh, it's not the disappearing of people, the what Yeah, I don't know those people.
I don't know anybody. Yeah, you're bad, guys, know.
The narco terrorism designation does feel very like those dystopian sci fi things where like you see like the propaganda news broadcast and like, and they were part of the terrorist organization of course, of course.
And we looked back and I know it seemed like an innocent wedding party, but we actually went back into their files. There was a lot of shit, a lot of weird stuff they were googling. So anyway, we entered the year in a bit of a not we but America entered the year with a bit of tech optimism. You know, I think the majority of people were like, Elon Musk won the election for Donald Trump, what can't
these guys do? And I feel like we're in a different place, And it's thanks to some amazing seizing of the moment from various tech companies. There's obviously the AI that keeps telling people to kill themselves or that they're like the secret savior of mankind. When they're like I think I invented a new math, they're like, you know
what I think you did, sir. Yeah. There was the Tesla bot kung fu display where it just looked it looked like a video you would see of like heartwarming ninety five year old gets his black belt and it's like, you know, it's not gonna actually look cool, Like the person looks like they're unsteady on their feet, and that's
what the Tesla one looks like. And it was also doing practice punches and kicks and stuff that was like completely in line with the person that they were practicing against, almost like it was a fucking programmed.
But it was nonsense and the movements were truly like, Oh, your uncle got a group on for fucking taekwondo classes. Yeah, and now at the fucking Christmas dinner, he's gonna show you a fucking demo that's very You're like, I guess technically that looks like martial arts, but can we go now, because it's it's like this thing's gonna kick my ass.
Everything that Elon Musk put out this year was like the like there. There were also his appearances on Rogan where he's like, listen to it, say, uh, call your mama a bitch war just like dying laughing while Joe Rogan can't even like muster. He tried a fake laugh. He did it bad. He tried, he tried, He kept trying to take it back to like damn, Like if you think about it, though, like that's actually crazy that it's even saying that right now, like this thing's just
getting better and funnier and better and better. Yeah, the uh self driving cars running red lights and like freaking out like a student driver. Do you remember that one? Were you out there? Yeah? Where there's one who was like trying to start getting like real shaky as it came to a red light and then it just like went around traffic and threw a busy intersection. Yeah. But my favorite at number nine has to be Mark Zuckerberg's much anticipated demo of Meta's new AI glasses.
So sick dude, super Remember he's he was calling this shit super intelligence.
Yeah, I was like, this is next, So this is super What are you gonna call it? It's fucking super intelligence? You're basically Superman eight hundo for a fucking pair. Oh what can it do? Asshole check? Makes you look like a dick?
Yeah, make you look like in fucking loser with eases.
I know, I know, I know what the listeners are saying. Guys, this wasn't this year. Like now everybody around me has these AI glasses on. They're everywhere. It seems like they've always been here. It really was very recent. It was just September when Mark Zuckerberg dropped these on the world and everybody around you started wearing them. Oh wait, I haven't seen a single fucking pair. I've seen one pair in the wild, you have.
I only see them in like weird tiktoks where dudes are trying to pick up on women or something.
Yeah, exactly, people were doing weird like on social media. It's always dudes do only people.
It's like food reviewers and pickup artists.
Food reviewers are perverts. Who do you think I hang out with guys? What do you that's my that's my crew.
A little bit of Night's crew. Yeah, it's actually mostly food reviewers, real real straight lace spuds.
But yeah.
Here he is doing the demo where again he was like, dude, this thing could just look at food and give you a recipe.
Like when it works, it met us start live ai. Yeah, so he throws to his homie starting Okay, a little delay, but we're back on track. You have here with soy sauce and other ingredients. Help. Hey, can you help me make a Korean inspired steak sauce for my steak sandwich? Here you can make a Korean inspired steak sauce using soy sauce SESAMELI, what do I do first? Mmmm?
Let her finish?
Yo.
See this is first that that was not the window. The video did not freeze. So now great, a pair to add to the sauce. Oh look, this is going on with the recipe. Uh oh yeah, sorry it skipped three steps base ingredients. So now greate the pair and gently combine it with the based sauce.
All right, I think the Wi Fi might be messed up.
Sorry, back to you, Mark. It's all good, it's all good. It's all good. It's all good. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I actually think this is hilarious. The whole thing is that you spend years making technology and then the Wi Fi.
At the day kind of Oh, it's the why you fucking coward.
Also, it's not the fucking Wi Fi at the most technolo. I said this at the time. It's not the wife.
Excuse twenty years ago, had an iPhone keynote. Uh it didn't work then?
Also, that was it clearly was not an issue with the Wi Fi. It wasn't like freezing up. It was skipping steps that Wi Fi. Everyone who has used aid get into jack.
All you do is you take the ingredients and the and then you cook them and that those are the instructions.
I see that you've already combined the ingredients. Brian, Yeah, well do you do.
It's the wi fi, I said, the guitar is out of two.
Red slacks. Is a hit? No, it's a fucking l. But it's a massive l.
Brother.
There were so many also good ones. The one that I wasn't there for that I wish I was therefore, was the Russian So I'm yes.
A I bought. Let's put this in Let's put this in international context because China, on the other hand, is
not solely ruled by Holigarth. They've got like a strong central government that is, you know, taking some of the money that people make and then putting it back into technology to like try and make themselves competitive or whatever, probably doing all sort of yeah, we we wouldn't know in this country competitive, but you know, they they dropped an AI that was like open source and cost way less money and was better than the ones in the US.
And they also gave us the first robot that people were like, wait, okay, this like we we've been expecting a robot for a long time where we were like, damn, that's actually pretty impressive, and we've gotten like those like Robot Dog Boston dynamic things that people say are like kind of pre programmed but or like you're seeing the one out of one hundred where it was like sick, I'm like doing doing good work. And when they tried to send it out in the wild, it got kicked
over by people in Philadelphia, as it should be. So they dropped a robot on people that was walking very smoothly, to the point that people were like, unzip the back of that.
Whoa, there's a person very smoothly walking very sexually.
Yeah, I know, it's sultry. It's different. It's like made a real sex.
It.
Also it had hips, way, it got its and it's got hips. It's got I said, it has more ass than it has any right to have. They were just like, yeah, give it, let's make it thick.
I mean, this is what happens when a bunch of men build the perfect specimen, right, and it will have this waisted hip ratio and walk like this. But yeah, I mean that call that motherfucker Christopher, because it was walking Okay, it was smooth and.
To the point. Motherfucker Christopher, because it could be my guest anytime.
I feel like they gotta they like did Mo cap on like a dancer to get that walk?
There's very yeah, like an actor. Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of I mean it has a it has like the walk of like a main character. I think it was rather than being like we've achieved bipedal motion and it's walking like an eighty year old man.
It's like yeah, yeah, it always walks like a fascinated old man. Yeah, it always looks like an old person who's walking on ice, like the bipedal robots. Like from the start, like yeah, they got that dog, but then like you see the bipedal ones and they're always like.
Just like kind of just literally looked like it was about to do wushue or something crazy.
Yeah, it's it's walking also like like a T one thousand too, like it's walking you down with like a menacing style too.
I'm like this is anyway, So that was like real casual, real sexy, just like you asked Bust And then so that's like a view of like what technology is going to look like in the future. But if we want to know what technology is going to look like in our future, because America is not on its way to becoming the next China, it's on the way to becoming the next Russia.
Foreign policies, Yeah completely, and we we.
Got to see what Russia's answer to all that ass was, and this thing was. It was a triumph. Man.
Those sanctions are hitting the sanctions, the sanctions are hitting. Bro It's I don't know what is going on, but this I wish I was there. I remember I put this in the dock that day, but we were out and yeah, yeah, this is.
Actually our first time getting to hear your thoughts on this. Here it comes. It's playing the Rocky themes, playing the Rocky theme, and.
It's a hot step and it's like it's doing the walk you're talking about.
Yes, it's the old person on ice, your grand ice, your grandpa, got a bunch of water in his boots.
It's it's like that thing where it's like, you know when an old person is falling for like sixty seconds before they hit the ground, it looks like that.
This is the part too, because you can kind of tell it strokes out like if you watch the left foot they tried to make it them wave and it waves and then it doesn't. The heels not on the ground. Here it goes. They're reaching up. It's got people there, it goes, no tors so grand, so it falls over forward. They're already like grabbing at it looked so drunk. Nothing has ever looked a drunk person has never looked this trunk. It hits the ground and the entire fucking chest piece
piece blows off and scatters it. It's like it's like when when your air pods fall out and like just shoot, like why they springlowed those in there? Like the funny part to.
Me is is it's exactly like an old person, like they're gonna fall in about thirty seconds and you just know it's coming.
It's and they know too. The handlers are like watch him, watch him.
What don't know why they didn't jump in sooner because it was so clear it was going to fall over.
Oh yeah, and like just this freeze frame, it looks like he said some wild racist ship at a bar and then fell over like because he's so not bears himself.
And then the friends like, come on, rich, come on man, we got to get out of here. Then they came out with this moment is you think you've seen the best part of it, and then they pull a black curtain across the stage and it does hide up and so it's just it's not to do this frame too, the murder scene. They're trying to do it. Nothing to see here.
It's like, yeah, like as if like when there's like a grizzly car accident, it's and like a body's been injected.
They're like, yo, cover that up, man, But.
They just did they have that tart ready there just in case it failed.
Even the their failure protocol was so because did not work very well.
Know that she was twisted up. Look at this and it seems more scooted the fucker off. Nothing to see here. Actually that actually didn't happen. What you just saw is was not was not the robot anyways, the crunk is shit dude.
Also to just the rocky theme, and this little fucking shit.
Bot comes out.
And like the two people who are so powerful, who are like yes, yes, and everyone else like this is such a fucking l why would you even like there are toys that operate better than this.
Yeah, all right, let's take a quick break we're gonna come back. We cracked the top nine. Would you believe it? We have a top eight, a seven, hell even a six coming up six just a bit, we'll be right back, and we're back. And speaking of the ones that we were out for, I was out for the next one. I just came back.
Oh that's right, Yeah, it was polya.
I came back and it was this is in here. Why are we talking about baby drug fires? This one has to win SoundBite of the year. Oh and yeah, this is the only show that's on it. When you write the quote into Google, it's just TDZ soundbites over and over, Like there's a New York Times article that talks about his general run where he made this claim. But nobody's got that sound, that perfect nobody sound. But it's right there.
Baby my infant nearly died huh in a drug fire for mass shootings.
It tells you everything you need to know, right there, telling me.
No one else picked up on how absurd that statement was.
The New York Times did a little bit of debunking. But when you write those words into Google, it's like TDZ Instagram, TDZ read it. This is the number one dude, it's so it was so. I mean, I guess maybe, well obviously I.
Don't count on the New York Times to do much or as if to be like, guys, this is the most hard hitting journalism we've done.
Okay, is to get hung up on this stupid SoundBite.
But just the idea, like on its face, it was so absurd because this is with the background of trying to justify a federal invasion of DC, right and in justifying that, you needed propagandists like Benny Johnson out here to say shit like, oh my god, DC is so bad.
You know how bad My infant nearly died. Oh my thank you God in a drug fire, in a drug fire.
For mass shootings and mash e so you have maybe you have infanticide, you have drug fires, mass shootings. This club has every, this, this his city has everything.
Thank you, mister Trump. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Let's see, let's just go through a couple details here, because he did in fact live in Washington, DC, so no lies detected. This was in a piece on Benny Johnson. The speaker of said quote right wing influencer that they were like this guy's like a plagiarist and a known liar, and he's been like proven to be full of shit over and over and over again, so
I looked into it. In fact, according to this New York Times article, police regular show, nobody has been murdered since at least twenty seventeen on the Black Pom, mister Johnson lived and his home was not burned. His next door neighbor's house was burned. So do it a little bit of exaggeration, would you say it?
Yeah, that I think, or just just fucking lying.
You know, my home was burned to the ground. People were murdered in my front yard, was what he said. Elsewhere in the thing, and the police were like that, No, nobody was murdered. There was a shooting on your block right to the hospital.
Maybe give him the benefit of then, maybe his kid got a cough from the smoke from the fire.
Next door nearly died after mass shootings.
No, it was the drug fire after It wasn't the mass shootings. I'll be I'll be genuine here.
It wasn't.
It was absolutely so did the mass shooting trigger the drug fire?
Is my question?
No, it's in this one.
He's basically throwing together three events that he's trying to create as like an omni crisis that he was experiencing. Shooting after It's not causal, No, it's just three man and also three coincidences. It's I think it's also just funny too, like when you do you do shit like this and you just show you absolutely don't give a shit about anything around you or the area, and you're like, oh my, I.
Got to get out of this fucking place.
Yeah, what about what about the people that almost actually died in the drug in the in the house fire, or people are like gonna no, No, these are merely just sort of inputs that I used to generate my victimhood.
That's right. I mean Donald Trump will tell you there's young women walking through the White House all the time. They say thank you, mister President exactly, and I don't follow up with them. I just should see it. I know what they're saying, and they're saying, thank you for cleaning up the streets. You're like Steven Sagall in many ways, here save me.
I go through there and I'm walking through the White House and who's there but George Washington himself and Abraham Lincoln.
And they're very they're very still, they're very stoic. And the only quote about how young he runs into young women. Yeah, he runs into young women in the White House, like you mean the people who work for you.
This is like, it's clearly a lie you've been saying since you used to say on the streets of Manhattan, right, yeah, and then now you've just adapted it to be like, yeah, the other place where people are free flowing through the just like the streets of Manhattan, the White House.
But one more time, Benny, my infant nearly died in a drug fire. Their drugs. Mass shootings, okay, multiple mass shootings. Oh god, people were murdered in my front yard, bro, Yeah, yeah, what about those people? They're not real people. We actually asked, we asked the police, and they said they don't matter. They don't It don't matter at all.
The annoying thing is that my driveway was staying right, yeah, exactly by a new more powerful pressure washer.
Do you know what smoke damage is like? To remediates much money.
We have a seven by ten foot Ethan Allen rug that we might have to throw out.
We had to redo all of our window treatments, all of the oh God.
Anyways, the real victim. We had to take a moment to stop down and honor the real victim, which is Benny Johnson. Yep, yep. And another victim too, I guess is our next one too, Yeah, another victim number seven. JD Vance killed the Pope.
Yeah remember this folk, Yes, I love that, I love I love this one because we're just adding more to the lore of jd future President JD Vance. Not only houch copulator in chief, but hey, pappal side.
Is that the word? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, little side of papal sum up on the crime side, the PayPal side, Dana love. Huh there's no drive? Yeah, yeah, there's a good picture. One of the last pictures we have of his eminence, Pope Francis alive and it is JD Vance walking up to him with both arms out in front of him like like he isn't moving his arms and the Pope looking like he knew it was coming.
It looked like as if he's like the devil has been threatening the Pope his entire life and say.
You will see me, Francis.
And then when he saw the JD Vance he's like, oh shit. It's always easy to forget the JD. Vans is a calf because he has like such born again Christian he's a convert right, and yeah, but he's like that new type of Catholic I know, like he just he just converted and he's way too excited about it.
And doesn't actually know what it is.
Doesn't know what it is well being Catholic.
No, I don't know what it is, but I I don't know.
It seems cool. You get you eat way first. Like my favorite part is.
You can be the as big a piece of ship as you want.
And at the end, if you say sorry, you get to go to heaven. That's right, Yeah, that is true. Do you think that's what it is?
Like it's just uh no, I'm like I'm more saying in the sense that like it's really so shallow enough to be like, God, I'm a piece of shit. I think I need to do this and hopefully like I don't burn.
Yeah, maybe he's.
Got to hedge my bets just in case, wager baby. Yeah. Yeah. His reaction was like anyone who saw that Tom Petty concert right before he died in la He was just like immediately like yo, yo, this is kind of crazy, dude, Like I was just damn dog, I was just with him. I just didn't know was like his response was so stupid.
But yeah, if this was any other person, these guys would be freaking out about if the people like they're they're just letting off so much smoke that they're the anti Christ like jade Van's Peter Tiel, like, if they weren't so weird and annoying about claiming everybody else was the Antichrist.
Yeah, yeah, they.
Just that's what's freaking me out. I'm like, well, shit, is this real? There's an Antichrist? Yeah?
Do I need to get right because if they look like it, especially with the Joe Rogan, what's more virgin than computer AI will be Jesus. I'm like, oh, you're trying to I mean, they're trying to speed run this new like techno religiosity shit. But fine, you know, but I do not believe all the controversies you hear about roboth theism.
We'll just say that. Yeah, I just wanted to. I just want to say, right up front, up front, what is it? Just don't just don't believe. Don't believe the haters, Okay, who I'm not going to tell you my name necessarily, but I will tell you don't believe the haters.
Are they did they like did the GPT like learn from Catholicism to be like you never heard okay before, hold on just before you ask what it is.
Don't believe all this shit you hear okay, very line from it.
Krad He's like, there were rumors that there was a rumor, but that was just bullshit.
But yeah, I mean Peter Teele was all over the place given his antichrist lectures while also being like does humanity need to come to an end so a better robot future could take over? I don't know, these are just questions. Thirty second pause. Well, he just like starts sweating profusely.
I know, he's sweating like like like a demon pretending to be a human, And it's like absolutely taking to your limit where you're like, I'm losing it.
I know a guy who's absolutely at his limit. His name is Peter Kiel. That is a way that Satan kills in movies, like I'm pretty sure in the Amityville Horror there's a part where like a priest comes face to face with the evil spirit in the house and like almost dies and then in the Exorcist, like a priest is trying to, you know, go up against the
evil spirit and gets like thrown out. Yeah, and like, I'm just like to meet the pope and have the Pope die immediately while you're selling yourself as like the number one Catholic. That's not an insignificant amount of smoke to people who like believe in Catholicism like that, that's kind of you mean, people who are highly highly superstitious. Yeah, to just be like, yeah, hours later the dang pope died.
Are there any Catholics though that? Look that are I mean that are mumbling about that.
I'm over here mumbling them you got to or else? What's the point all these fucking ghost stories? What's the fun? Why are we not like that? Is?
Like I feel like miss all the ghost story and exorcism stuff is pushed by the Catholic church too.
Yeah, yeah, man, you got one right here. Hello, you got a great one right here. Someone you don't like the new American Pope. And by the way, this might just be what it took to get an American poem.
And honestly, when you look at JD.
Vance's face, he looks like someone you would cast in one of those seventies Exorcist movies as like an Antichrist.
He has that look, yeah, the deep set eyes.
And yeah it's also the eyelinery, thick eyelashes, dude, because I always say he looks like he's part of Zod's.
Crew from Superman A little bit. Yeah, maybe keep them in a two D triangle, just like weak chinned Zod homie. Yeah, yeah, yeah exactly.
But they all kind of got the sort of dark hair, beautifully manicured beard, dreamy, just as.
A humor says message.
But dick, he'd be so funny if he he was like actually wearing a ten and a half, but he had he's always trying to fill out at thirteen.
He's like clomp clop, clopping around.
He leaves that tissue paper in the toe.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn't even realize that other people take it out. It keeps your toes warm, you know, that tissue at the end. What what for packing it? Yeah, for your feet to stay warm. All right, let's take another break. We're gonna come to our sixth story, which is a bit of an omni story.
To our senses.
We'll be right back and we're back, and you know, all the rage with the kids is here fucking brain rot. And I think there's a good dang reason is because the dang president's brain's rotten.
You know what I'm saying, Number six on the list, the six god himself, Donald Trump's so.
Many stories about his brain melting, it could have taken up both six and seven. Oh wow, how much this guy's dang brain has rotten the two hemispheres of the brain when you do six s. There was a moment towards the end of the election where he like was really like out on his feet, like just seemed to be losing it that I was like, oh shit, Like, if Kamala wins, this would be it for Trump, Like his brain is breaking.
She just has to come out and blow on him a little bit.
Just like all we need is that he just needs a slight push and he's gone for good. Like that would be the end of the Mega movement because he's not going to hold up for another four years. And obviously that was way too uh wishful for like Kamala's ability to garner votes, the mainstream Democratic Party's ability to get votes. However, what we're seeing instead is that he won and that shit is happening. His brain is rotting. It's like cotton candy that somebody poured coke on. It's just.
Filing outs, just a big brown cloud after.
So, I don't know, do we just want to like talk about our favorite like there's a great There's enough to fill out an Oscar category of nominees for favorite brain rotted ass moment of the year with our president.
Every single one. It's more just like, what were the ones that weren't terrifying?
Do you guys want to go individually like what we mean personal favorites.
I'm gonna give a list of nominees. Okay. There was the How'd you do that? Probably the least terrifying. It was just him talking about his son Baron, being a computer whiz, and the thing that he was impressed by was Baron's ability to after Trump said close the computer, not close the computer, or close it and then open it back up and turn it back on. And I look at him and I say, as you do that.
There was a related story elsewhere where he was talking about cars and he said everything is computers.
That was the White House lawn Tesla sales pitch commercial.
It feels like a different decade. By the way, that seems like it can't possibly have been this year, but it was. I mean, this isn't necessarily related to his brain melting, but his face did look like Haley joel Ozma in Ai when like the things are going wrong on the inside and things are sparking, and like one
half of his face like starts to melt down. That was happening here and there there was his inability to pronounce the key ingredient and tail and all and a, I see, Dave, you're gonna need to help me about see if.
I can do this.
I like how you immediately abandon it and he's like, look, man, you know it is a metaphin, but I bless.
You shab Do, which, it should be noted, was not an incidental part of the press conference.
The entirety of the press conference was to make the claim that a seed, a medapine, the key active ingredient in Thailand all causes autism. You would think you would do enough homework to know how to pronounce a key active ingredient that that would be an incorrect assumption.
You know what else you would think that Thailand all would do anything about it, like Thailand, I'll get up, upland they're lying about you.
There was the time that a guy fainted away in the middle of his press conference. So this was a really good one because a guy fainted in a press conference while he just stood there and didn't do shit.
He got up the no no while he photo shopped himself badly into the scene some right.
Yeah.
Crazy thing was he got up as if he's like, oh see this is where I get up and I stand like a sentry real quick. Like that was like as if that was his brain was like okay, Donald, do your partner.
Everybody's looking at the guy who died and he's just standing facing forward like we're still taking the picture, right, Yeah, it's it's worth noting that was the same press conference where he first started falling out in the middle of Like it was it opened with doctor Oz giving a speech.
Part one was him falling asleep.
Yeah yeah, Doctor Oz gave a speech and when he said like that America can sleep again, Trump like literally fell asleep like doctor doctors said people can sleep again, and he like was so sleepy that he just had to take that shit. Literally, yeah, fell asleep.
It's always sick when people are I mean, it shows how strong you are when people are giving a speech and they basically do it at your bedside. Like the lectern was next to the resolute desk so Trump could just sit while it was happening. It's such an odd visual where it's like, well, I can't get up, so just bring the lectern here so it looks like I'm here.
Yeah.
I had them put wheels on it.
Yeah. And then yeah, a company rep from one of the one of the healthcare companies that was there literally passed out, which would seem like, I don't know, the.
Stock price went down after that.
Yeah, I don't know. I know Tylan al sure did, but Tylan, I'll get up, passed the fuck out, and uh Trump. I think Trump's weird response and like just being like, am I still asleep? Is this really happening? Was overshadowed a bit by RFK Junior fucking bolting out of the room, but again, just like an amazing display of just being confused and not knowing what the fuck is happening at all.
The speed run towards fascism is also happening too, because they like the people behind this movement who really want like like the policy changes, know that they have like a human rubber stamp in the form of a senile Trump. You basically get as much through because he has no fucking idea what's going on, and not even as if he did, he'd be like, well, I don't agree with this, But even more so because it's like, dude, let's go
over to fucking Baron's house. His dad's so old, we can play with nuclear warheads exactly.
Trump is the presidential equivalent of the parent who's like passed out on the couch and you're able to drink all their beer.
Drink, drive their car, shoot the guns out of the car if you want, like whatever, shoot the car.
Who gives a shit. It's a fucking piece of shit anyway.
But then the ones I think that were the most repeatable for these two, I do think it is honorable mention to bring up this one.
If we remember, nothing bad could happen, It can only good happen.
That was a good one. That was also a good one.
Nothing bad can happen, it can only happen. That's also a quotable.
It sounds like something Homer Simpson would.
Say, just for the record, I think so people can hear the acidif.
Effective, immediately, the FDA will be notifying physicians at the use of I said, well, let's see how we say that.
How you say that.
You stopped immediately?
Ah, well men, okay, No, I'm gonna do it on my own. I'm gonna do it myself. Give me the keys, Dad, a big I can do it. I can. I can drive. Just good, just good.
Then there's obviously everything's computer.
That's beautiful. This is a different panel that everything's.
Computer, man, God, legendary, and then a different panel then everything.
I just I love that overwhelmed.
The bite of the automotive industry and how they've no way, he's just he's just saying what he sees.
Yeah, it's all computer. I don't know what this ship is. Is everything's computer?
But yeah, I think the one that got the most mileage as just a fucking repeatable is definitely the Baron.
Is Baron's aptitude in your view business.
Or politics, maybe technology.
He can look at a computer, I try and turn it off. His turn it off. I turn off his laptop. I said, oh good, and I go back. Five minutes later, he's got his laptop. I said, how do you do that? None of your business? Dad.
I just love how this gives you a glimpse into their relationship of.
Just yeah, oh, ex, definitely are you winning son that you smell like this bitch the fuck out of here? All right, baby, I love you. I was gonna say. My number one though that we haven't covered yet is just because we knew that he was being given a
cognitive test like in past years. Yeah, but he has since gotten it in his head because he likes he's been in ensconced in just like a cocoon of yes man for so long that like he just can't even have a thought that like, maybe this is embarrassing what I'm doing, And so he just keeps fucking bragging about this cognitive test we have.
The cognity gets like every three months, it seemed, because every three months because they know he's teetering on the edge of not being able.
To identify the root is a lion and which one is a camel.
That's the wildest thing to me. I feel like he's had like seven of these in his two terms, and I've never heard of a cognitive test before.
Well, there's also the MRIs where they're like, oh, these are preventative MRIs or something, and like they are. Few doctors came out and they're like, there's no such fucking thing as that preventative. As you're a monitor, you're you're curious about what the fuck is going on, and that's why you're doing it. It's like, and now we're gonna scan your brain and heart preventatively.
It's all part of a preventative measure.
The other thing though, too, with the cognitive test, it's clearly a product of because he has such a child like mind now in his senility, just like how the Johnny and Fantino FIFA piece orders like and this is your award can show are you ready to take your your how smart a my test?
Mister president? Absolutely, I'm ready day one. I'd like to see AOC do this.
It's like when my my grandmother would be like, you need to eat spinners like Popeye so you could be strong.
I'm like, I'll be strong. She's like, yeah, you can be strong like Popeye, and I'm like hell yeah.
And then I thought I was I was not fucking strong because I ate that ship. But I believed for a moment, I believed because I had a child like mine.
I can I can pick up on complex patterns like one A two, you have no idea where it's going. Well, what do we have here? That's what see? And then I get that right. The doctors look at me, they say, how do you do that? They say so with tears running down their face.
They walk up to him and they give me a big good in my forehead and they say, how you do that?
I say, nanny your business. Yeah, this ship doesn't get better. It's it doesn't. He's not going the other way, no one. And that's the thing where they say too.
There's a lot of speculation about the Alzheimer's medication he might be on, because they're like, oh, the hand bandages look like maybe he's getting like quembi, which is like in Alzheimer's medication, maybe like through his like wrist or something, and that's why he's like now the bandages are ever present short for quembin yama. That's how they say Wemby's
name in France Limby Quinby. But yeah, like and I think a few like a few medical people were saying, like, you know, the one of the side effects, he's like, you're energy level goes in the toilet, which we could.
Explain the sleepiness.
But also to your point, it's like this is only for early and it's effective for a small number of people in the early phase. Once it progresses, there's nothing that can be done. And again, if you've had relatives go through this kind of mental decline, you know that, like it's it's hard enough when they have no job or responsibilities. Now map the presidency over that and whatever.
Who fucking knows. Yeah, it is wild that our very last president showed us exactly like this is bad man. You can like have somebody in there who doesn't really know what's going on, yeah, and everybody will just like protect them. And then now we're getting like that ramped all the way up. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeahah yeah. Anyways, let's just keep giving them awards and treats. Yes, four years,
it'll be good, be good for everyone, all right. That is our numbers ten through six stories of the year. We're at the top five. Holy shit, Oh my guys, my god, you don't fuck this up. Don't fuck this up.
Don't fuck this up. So we're going to leave you on a cliffhanger, did you We're going to be back soon with probably the next episode to tell you what the top five stories, including the number one story of the year twenty twenty five is on The Daily zeiceast until then, Miles, we're going me just on the computer. I'm on the computer. How'd you do that? How'd I do that? Brian the editor? Where can people find you?
M at Miles house?
Okay, and you can find Miles at my house on the side of my house, taking big ships, sending and I call it again, sending it in, sending it all right back tomorrow. Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourselves, get your vaccines way you still can get your flu shots. Don't do nothing about Waite supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye.
The Daily zeite Geist is executive produced by Catherine Law, co produced by Bae Wang.
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