Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of the Nightmare Before trend miss produced by Tim Burton, but it's not directed by him. Okay, asshole. Oh, tim Burton's just presenting. It is made by other guy whose name. If I really wanted to drive this home, I would have remembered his name. Fuck it's like a French French name. I think who the actual director of a Nightmare Before Christmas is not Tim Burton? Oh oh yeah, he just presented it. He was like, hey, I just saw this movie. It's
like pretty sick Henry Selick. Anyways. Also, same deal with James and Giant Peach. I believe my name is Jack. That over there is Miles. This is the Morning Zoo. Now this is the afternoon episode where we tell you some stuff that is trending, and we're gonna start off with kids and teens and their dang phones. Oh speaking dude, Eminem's mom died.
Kim DeBie Debbie, fuck you DeBie, yeah passed away. I thought about that iconic, I don't.
I think everyone was yelling fuck you Debbie for years, but yeah, Debbie, Debbie haf passed away. I just wanted to add that for all the millennials who are listening to Eminem and be.
Like, shit's tight, dude, I hate my mom to kind of does Eminem like? Is Eminem popular with a younger generation? How has Eminem? I don't think so, because they like bananas?
I saw.
No. They're like, what y'all were just letting him say the F word a bunch and like kept it moving.
They're like, you know, here's the thing. Kids, a different time, we were pieces of ship, didn't know nothing.
Yeah.
But anyway, yeah, lung cancer unfortunately, sorry.
Sorry to hear it. Eminem, who I know is a big listener. All right, should we talk about these dang teens and their dang phones. Yeah. So there's an article an mp are about teens being hard to get off their phones during school, and a couple things jumped out to me about this article. First's it starts with like the eyewitness testimony of a teacher who had to quit because it was just so awful to try and teach children at this school where they're allowed to be on
their phones. And he said, most of the people in the class, they've got their headphones in, they've got their phones on, they're not actually listening. Huh, Like I don't know. I just I didn't realize it had gotten to that place where the schools were like, yeah, I don't know, if you've got to be on your phones, then like maybe try and listen to like a good podcast or something, as.
Long as like in the same I know, this is science class, so like maybe you can listen to like maybe RFK on Joe Rogan or.
Something that can be an episode you guys listen to. So it's tangentially.
I don't know, phones in in class is so respect, I know, I think we both have the same sort of reaction to that.
Whereas I remember when like in the dawn of the iPod kids were that's when like kids started bringing like wearing headphones at school and shit and even like on walkmen's and stuff like that.
But teachers took that as straight up like, oh, you want to.
Say fun to you disrespect?
Yeah, no, absolutely, They're like, and you're gonna wear fucking headphones, and as like, yeah, man, it's their fucking they don't exist.
I don't even know who I'm talking act in.
These class battle has just been being waged like out of my sight, and like apparently the kids just won.
They're just like, fuck you, I don't care what you say anymore. I mean, it makes sense to ban the phones in that case when you're quite literally being like, I'm sorry, all my senses I need to learn are being occupied by nonsense.
There's also this line from an English teacher that bummed me out, and I again from the teacher's perspective, I like, totally get why this is a bummer, but the way it's being framed, the English teacher said, Uh, nobody goes in education in order to become the phone police. We want to be able to focus on our content.
Oh no content, No curriculum.
You're calling the curriculum that they're teaching in class content.
Oh how do you do what?
I saw these content creators? Uh, by being a content creator myself. Check out.
Let's talk about verb tense agreement, one of my favorite pieces of content from the last seven hundred years.
So that's fucking tough. That is really tough.
Yeah, that makes me more and more wonder I mean, like, yeah, as I think about my own kid and like the screen shit now, you know, because like man, I was at the was at the grocery store the other day. I saw a baby I could not believe how young they were were just on an iPad, Like I'm talking like like maybe eight months old.
It was sort of jarring to kind of see that.
And I get a lot of time playing game break, yeah, not just like.
Looking at a bunch of shit going by on the screen. I'm yeah, I'm like starting to.
Be like, damn, how do you how do you protect your your wee little ones from fully going overboard with the screens?
But yeah, case by case basis, you.
Know what I mean. I feel like this. Yeah, it feels like this will be the part that they show in movies like The Mad Men about this era, to be like, look, how fucked up it is. Like the kids were allowed to smoke in class. You know that that's basically what here.
Yeah, they're zeroing out vape hits as they call it, like I'll hold it in my lungs for so long I will not blow anything out, So try and catch me. All.
Yeah, the articles about like how this battle was like being waged on a classroom by classroom basis, And finally the schools are like, all right, guys, I think we're gonna have to take the phones away. And so now they're basically treating the schools like a Dave Chappelle show, and just like everybody has to hand in their phones when they arrive and then you get them back at the end of the day the.
Other other chap show.
Other places are take it away before class. But that feels like that's not going to that's good, right, but you got you probably have to take it away at the beginning. But yeah, like like we've said before, the really like posh British boarding schools are actually like saying you are not allowed to come on campus with smartphones and issuing kids flip phones that they're like allowed to use m but nothing else.
Yeah, well yeah, that kind of goes on with like this other article I saw where so many college students are using like AI now for everything, and it's like it's just getting harder to detect, and it's just like I don't know, dude, I guess I just have to come here to get the piece of paper that says I can like enter the middle class?
Is that the thing?
Guys?
Is it the thing? No?
All right, then I'll AI fuck.
It all right. Also having to do with the youngs, there's a new article in Axios that just it has this one chart salaries. Americans say they consider the minimum to be quote, financially successful, And so you got boomers who, on average, say ninety nine thousand and nine, You soft ass motherfuckers.
Really, Boomers did it all, didn't you? Okay, must be nice.
Gen X two hundred and twelve thousand, three hundred dollars. Probably a little bit more realistic than the boomers who are like, yeah, I just had I kept my paper route up through my mid forties and I have.
A great Yeah, one hundred percent of my salary.
Millennials are down at one hundred and eighty thousand dollars. And then gen Z is that five hundred and eighty seven thousand dollars is what they think is the bare minimum to be financially successful. That seems unrealistic in the other direction, But what are we considering? So gen Z includes, according to this age range, twelve year olds, So that's maybe that's skewing. It is like all the twelve year olds being like, I mean, yeah, twelve to twenty seven.
So maybe it's like all the people who are twelve to sixteen being like, minimum, I should be making a mill like otherwise I'm a fucking loser dude.
Yeah, but that's tough.
I mean, that's what for these kids who are coming of age with cell phones and social media like in their face and you're just seeing like all this influencer shit, Like you would be like, okay, so was that that dude's in a Lambeau Okay and they live in a fucking impossible engine and they have all this stuff.
Yeah, I think six hundred to be successful, I.
Mean I guess realistically, like yeah, to like own a home in like most or at least like in California, they say you need to make like the household in companies to be around one ninety something.
Yea.
I feel like, is that the bar? Like what is the bar? Is the bar?
I think millennials would probably describe it as home ownership and full stop, that's it. That's a success and gen z this this astronomical figure does feel like, oh yeah, financial success is Lambeau, right, yeah, lambo or fucking nothing, dude, Like that's a failure, dude, life for my fucking owning a house, dude, fucking reach higher.
Yeah, but this is.
Also the reason why I like, there was a survey about like why like younger people are they say they're financial woes are feeding into their interest in like other political parties, like specifically Trump, because they're probably having a hard time even getting close to one hundred thousand dollars. Yeah, so that's the biggest gap between what is actually available to them and what they're.
What they think is realistic. Yeah, yeah, and that's.
Kind of I remember, Like for me, I was just like that, I just want guys, I want to I want to live outside of my house, my parents' house. It's like, right, like that's good enough, baby, But yeah, well we all learned, we all grow, and we all realize.
It might not be six hundred k.
I would be interested to see, like what if this was eighteen and up like gen Z, what what that number would look like?
But probably a little more realistic, but a lot of like those TikTok street interviews I see when people, when I hear younger people talk about finances like they think a broke person makes one hundred thousand dollars, right, yeah, yeah, and I'm like a broke k All right, sorry, all.
Right, let's take a quick break and we'll be right back, and we're back.
I just realized, full disclosure, I'm gonna say it, I had a booger hanging out of my nose that whole recording the whole video.
So anyway, this would be our most citys YouTube video ever.
Look over for the Easter Egg if you want to see a fucking straight up just dangler off my nostril tip.
There it is spelt.
And I was like, oh no, and I just looked at the video like, fuck, dude, this is why I should not be on camera anyway.
Actually, I sink six million dollars in to digitally remove it by frame Kevin Costner's hairline and water World.
Yeah, Henry Cavill's mustache exactly.
Uh so AirPods pro To released a while ago. We thought, yeah, but there's a new video from a new feature, a new feature being introduced where they can serve as a clinical grade hearing aid, pending regulatory approval. But that doesn't stop them. They're not waiting for the regulatory approval to drop the sick video in which a dad is hearing impaired and doesn't know it up to this point, and like so he's just like watching his daughter open Christmas
presents and it's all like muffled. You pointed out it.
It sounded like he landed on o Maha Beach Dog Green sector on June sixth, nineteen forty four to give a saving Private Ryan reference.
It's just like, yeah, he's got saving Private Ryan hearing. Yeah, shell shock, saving Private Ryan hearing. As his daughter opens the presence and he can't hear anything, and then I think he gets the air POD's Pro two for Christmas, and they try and frame it as like and then he like, here's his daughter for the first time ever.
I don't know if he just got it for Christmas because his wife's like, hey, jackass, put in your AirPod. Like it's not even that it even open. I don't think he unboxed it.
Oh he was sitting there. That's what's so weird.
It's like, so you knew and you were just choosing to check out on Christmas Day. Hey, while your daughter was playing an acoustic guitar composition.
He's just not a fan. Yeah, so this daughter, oh oh dang, all right, yeah that's tight. But it like goes back through all his memories and he can't hear her and like all the memories of her childhood. So it really has this you know, we we've seen the Apple commercial before where like Mother Nature shows up to an Apple board meeting and is like, you guys are fucking up, and then Tim Cook like directly addresses God and is like, actually, we're not. And here's all the
ways that we're contributing to sustainability. So the kind of a similarly striking a similarly self important note, they are like, and now, thanks to Apple, this guy can hear his daughter sing for the first time.
At this this Tim Cook tweet from a few days ago when he like posted the video all these blue check fucking freaks are in here, being like this is one of the best ads of all time, and is Apple finally back to being non woke.
Like because as a white family, yeah.
White family where the dad could give a fuck about his kids or white but real family, Yeah, I want some fucking girl dad who's.
Like, oh babe, right, love your talents. No, check the fuck out.
You can't even hear shit because you were fucking rocking too hard to Metallica in the fucking nineties.
And yeah, now you're fucking they're hanging out on Christmas Day.
There is so much family is back, great commercial touching, family oriented and not woke. Thank you for not forcing DEI down consumers, Like, this is all a fucking weird bot non. I just don't even I think it's cause Elon Musk fucking replied to it.
And so this is cool.
Hey, this is kind of cool.
Thanks you guys. You guys, you guys.
Elon likes this new Apple commercial.
This is also cool and not woke and does not suffer from the woke mind virus.
There was a brief declaration of martial law, a brief ye kind of coup by the president in South Korea. What if that was in America? Were like, there's apparently, I don't know, Trump declared martial law.
That is so possible where it's like he did it and then like the army is like dude, no, and he's like.
Nah, you know what, never mind where I'm like sure, and then everybody's just like, oh, we're so tired of this guy.
Yeah.
So yunsu yoel the president has been like in a waning in.
Popularity is putting it lightly.
He's one of the like more hardcore authoritarian presidents.
I guess I went a little over the top with Tailspin. I also described the moon as I'm like the light of the moon is in a tail spin, going from the full moon until barely a crescent cratering.
What are you gonna do?
And anyway, I'm on the internet too long.
The opposition party had been like voting against his legislation. They've tried to impeach him, and then in a recent election like like lost his majority to the opposition party and like they're aligned parties, and then yeah, declares martial law for saying like these people were like doing activities against this state and like we're North Korean like sympathizer leftist coups sort of how he's painting it. But you're like, is there evidence and like nah, nah, not really, but
we got to stop this. And anyway, like the police are out. The videos are wild with like tanks and helicopters and shit at the National Assembly, but luckily the members of Parliament were able to convene completely vote down the like the the declaration of martial law like unanimously, and then slowly it was like, well, was the president going to acknowledge it? And didn't until finally it has been acknowledged and they are it is no longer in effect, but yeah, it's it's just.
It's I think, honestly, probably it seems to us in America, but I feel like we are very close to seeing this kind.
Of oh yeah, Like I mean we already kind of have in like very small moments, but like something this k I feel like, hold on to your.
Whole butt, the whole one, because sometimes you tell me to hold on your button, I just hold what half of my butt? Yeah, just hold one half?
I know, I know your whole butt?
No, okay, orders received.
Yeah, but again, this this like tactic of declaring marshal law a lot of people pointed out has been like it's always been under like authoritarian sort of leaning presidents.
Yeah, and it feels like just where we're at, where they're i mean, everybody's watching each other. They're like, Okay, so that authoritarian tried to like claim that the election was stolen by the rival party. So I'm going to do that too. So this is all part of the same thing. And I'm sure Trump will learn from this, and yeah, if there's a wipeout in the mid terms, there will be all sorts of interesting fuckery.
Yeah, so we'll see.
This could lead to I mean a lot of they've been calling for his resignation for a while, like last month, there were professors that told him to resign, like he's Catholic and like a group of South Korean Catholic preach like you should resign.
Bro.
No, yeah, yeah, yeah, beyone, As he said, I think that's what he quote tweeted that thing, yone, you really do?
Huh?
All right, well, those are some of the things that are trending on this Tuesday, December third. We are back tomorrow with the whole last episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine, get your blue shots, don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow.
Bye bye,