Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Pope Trendonardo aka Pope Trendo Trendo Trendo aka America trend Pope.
Wow, look at look at us. We fucking did it. We fucking I mean, because it's so funny. You read something we read so many articles about. It's like, where where does the Catholic Church like need to make gains? And they're like, in America, it's contracting, and maybe they're like,
maybe this will help, Maybe this will help. Yeah, maybe maybe if you if you really wanted to help, you would have you know who you would have made pope And we already told you that with our Ai slop who you should have made Pope Lebron James Lebron mm hmmm honestly, yeah, if you can just do anything. Lebron sounds like a pope's name, Pope Lebron. Yeah, fourth, Yeah, Pope Leonardo, the Leo, the Fourth. A lot of people had that idea before, so starting things off on a
very unoriginal front. Yeah, the big big thing because Americans are into college sports and Villanova villain. Yo, new Pope just dropped, He's from Nova. If you fuck with the Philadelphia area, bro, Like we know about Nova. My friend Chris, you know, Philly fan, Philly based all his like relatives went to Nova. Yeh, he's like, bro, but he's like between the Nova Knicks and the Pope, He's like, we're eating Bro, I know, for really eating. I was like,
you're right. Shout out Villanova shot Wildcats. Shout out to. Villanova is a college in the Philadelphia area that's one a couple of basketball titles recently, and they're they have a thing happening with the Knicks right now where like all of the player, like a bunch of the best players on the team played together in college, which like doesn't happen. And then they just got a dang Pope just got everything's coming up Philadelphia, Everything's coming up Nova.
Hell yeah, man, good for them. What's up with this point? He's from Where's he? He's from Chicago, born in Chicago. It's a Chicago guy going to Villanova for It's got things to hide. His real name Robert Pravo. Is that how it's pronounced Pravo? Isn't that how they pronounced? Like the tour buses prevost those buses. I've never pronounced that before, but you know you've seen a R E V O S T. Whatever it is. Pre vost pray vo, let us pray though, Let us pray though. I like my
ship with Chunky prey Go. His name is Cardinal Pravo. Wow. He was born in chic k go. Okay, okay, and now I'm on a roll. Okay, now you can't stop talking in rhyme. It's a first ever American pope. This was as a young Catholic boy, I was like, but why is the pope not? I think it was like the first time that I was like, wait, America is like not not the only country. Yeah, it's not the center of the world. I remember being blown away because wasn't John Paul Polish? Yeah, And I was like, how
how do you do? Is that a thing? Like the people the first racest jokes? We all hear, Yeah that guy. How many light bulbs can he screw in or not? Yeah? But uh this is this was a shocker. I got I gotta say, Uh, so he's just some dude from Chicago. He was an American cardinal, just some guy from Chicago. Yeah, just a perfect eighties comedy yeah, King Ralph style. So
apparently having an American pope was considered taboo before. It's very taboo because given the geopolitical power already wielded by the United States, you would think maybe, uh, to take a step of that, what's left of maybe an alternate source of power. The two most powerful people in the world now are both American President of the US. Like any good American Catholic person within the structure of the Catholic Church, has he also helped cover up sexual abuse.
He's been accused of it. Miles and the people who accused of covering up cases. Wow, I mean, you know, it seems like a lot of like, let's see where this investigation goes type thing and then like moving move. I don't know if he was doing the three card Monty thing that they do with the sex preads, but the sex crims. But yeah, obviously you know that's not great. Also, and you're not gonna believe this, but has said some less than progressive things about same sex marriage in the past.
So hey, look again, that's the Catholic Church for you, I know, but for a pope, for a pope, he's on the progressive side of the Leger. He he was a Francis guy. The so woke pope like kind of brought him up, blessed him with what is what is considered to be one of the most powerful jobs in Catholicism, which is like he names the bishops. I don't think
he like named. He's not like your ted, but like he did, he determines who gets to be bishop, which is he's like the bishop shot caller, Bishop shot caller, wow, wow, which is not the cardinal. At first, I was like, that seems like a real conflict of interest that he like named all the people who voted him to be pope, but those are cardinals, and that's different. Bishop's higher or lower. I think bishop's lower, right, the cardinal is like, because you know who the cardinal is of your city, like
Cardinal Roger Moel. Yeah, they always shout him at LA who is like the big cardinal area. I think it was O'Hara was maybe his last name? Okay, sure, Cardinal Bishop O'Hara. Uh that that could be wrong. That might just be the name of a of a high school that is a high school in Philly. That might be Yeah, yeah, I was, I was. I was asleep at that point in the mass, I guess, but anyway, he was like the big archbishop. Oh, he was the Archbishop John Francis O'Hara,
the Archbishop of Philadelphia. I was thinking of the school I was there. My parents are not gonna be happy there. They just listened for the occasional times that Catholicism comes up to see if I know what I'm talking about, straight up heresy and it and also with you they they do appreciate when I when I say that, and with your spirit. Maybe less about the saviors downstairs when you guys do talk about the church. I'm just saying
they would have given him a big one. Yeah, but yeah, he spent a lot of time in Peru supporting Venezuelan immigrants. Seems very quick pro immigrant, very quick. Right, this is day two. I don't know. I don't know. I just don't even know what the norm is like. Is it usually a knockout dragon day? I think it usually takes a little bit longer. I think we uh, you know, some some of the people who were like on the short list, according to the media, were like much more
conservative than this person. So I guess in that respect we dodged a papal bullet. Papal bull whatever. I don't know. There's a wordplay there that Miles just blessed that joke with his hand. I have to anyway, that's and that's all the Pope news that fit to print, as far as I can tell any too much. Sorry about that, Sorry about sorry about all. He's got glasses, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, good for him? All right? What's Bill Gates getting up to?
He just he's he's trending because he's basically said, I'm giving all my money away for the next twenty years being I'm gonna do the good billionaire thing and give away over you know, his more than two hundred billion dollars on quote global health, development and education, so basically in twenty years. It will close its stores in twenty forty five. And I think, I don't know, part of it is like he I think he's the way that
I've seen this rolled out. He has a lot to say about Elon Musk, which you should you're a millionaire problem, okay, But he's like, I feel like part of me is like, are you saying this to juxtapose yourself as a billionaire, to be like, I'm not one of the bad ones. I mean, I'm a billionaire. By default, I am bad, but I'm not the bad because look at what Elon's doing. He said, Uh, he was accusing him of quote, killing
the world's poorest children. I mean, that's facts, facts, So I'm not going to be like, all right, Bill, wait a dunk on him. But then he also goes on to say, uh, you know that like he would, I'd love for him to go in and meet the children that have now been infected with HIV because he cut that money. When you know Bill Gates, he's it seems pretty consistent in terms of like trying to make the
world better. Now, how effective that is, I'm not I'm not the best person to sort of gauge how effective is philanthropy is, but they clearly do stuff. And I'm glad to hear that. Someone's like and I'm fuck it, I'm giving it all away. Because he did say my
kids ain't getting this shit. He did, Yeah, I think they're getting like, yeah, some they're manner of fifty million something yeah, yeah, they're only getting fifty million yeah and the yeah, I guess usually these things like the Gates Foundation are like the Clinton whatever, like they just become like wealth funds. And they're like invested and stuff like that.
So the idea of like setting a end date where they're like, and that's when we'll be out of money because we are giving it all away, is can someone go out with a fucking bang be like, no, bro, here's one hundred BILLI for fucking unhoused people. Yeah, in the United States, boom, let's go. I mean, like, I get you're stretching it out over years, but you know, the brand is really toxic for billionaires, and it can just take one person to really work on their brand.
You know. That's the conversation that's happening behind closed doors, worked on our branding? How do we build a brand? These greedy motherfuckers who don't know a working person if their life depended on it. So all their ideas are so abstract and like won't resonate. Like what if you opened a theme park that was free for brown kids. Oh, I don't know what the answer is, but I know
that it involves AI. That's right, you know, exactly exactly all right, there's a there's a big I don't know which one's bigger bigger news in terms of the passing of the torch, but we have a new top three soda, which I don't. I'm not gonna say I'm shocked, but I was spiritually affected by this. It's like a head of state has passed or so. Yeah, exactly, this is there's a new top three. So do you know the top three sodas off the top of your head? Up to this point, I don't know. I only know like
coke or Pepsi are probably the top two. Coke and Pepsi and Doctor Pepper have been our top three. Doctor Pepper really like the people who love Doctor Pepper loved Doctor Pepper so hard, like they just yeah, yeah, anyways, Pepsi has been knocked out of the top three. Oh and god Jack, hold on, really you are right? Yeah? Yeah, for real, all of the all of the Pepsi has been knocked out of the top It's it's been replaced by sprite. Oh ship. Yeah, okay, I get behind that, Spry. Yeah. Hey,
our time has come clear. Drinkers unite. Yeah, we obeyed our thirst to the top three. Baby Anthony honestly did it to me for knowing how on the internet people know the healing power of sprite out of like a fucking soda fountain. Well this is this was a long time coming. Surprising that it took this long. Yeah, I mean, while we're going through such a caffeine assance where everybody is like, yeah, being caffeinated, it's surprising that a non
caffeinated beverage is taking is landing in the top three. However, I will say, we're not If you need a caffeinated pick me up, you're not going to Pepsi anymore. Yeah, You're going to Monster like cocaine Blast. Yeah, exactly, Yeah, monster cocaine Monster cocaine Blast. Yeah. So it never really made sense like this is this seems like, you know, either coke or Pepsi, we're gonna last in the top three, and then you needed some some variety in there. But yeah,
I don't know. I mean it may we've been dunking on Pepsi since we did that, like one long form story about the logo redesign, you know, and how lost they are as a company who has like been like a spokesperson for Pepsi, you know, like the ars dude, the top people, the Spice Gros data mess back in the day. Recently, I'm saying, oh, yeah, they're off that generation next shit, remember Yeah, that Generation Next was fucking
killing it. The last time I heard I can think of a celebrity being associated with Pepsi was the Generat Yeah, yeah, twenty twenty. Was that twenty twenty? I think it was right after anyway, Yeah, where she's like, I've solved racial inequity and it just gives the Kapa Pepsi and then everybody's cool. I think that this is a direct result of this, but it's definitely like the death. They're part
of the same thing, you know. Yeah, I mean that must suck to work at Pepsi, right, Like if you're like in their innovation, like if you're the people that are like in charge of making sure the brand is hot, they're probably like, you fucked us. Yeah, because Sprite is a coke product, I think, right, yeah, there's a Starry Do or whatever the fuck whatever, you know what I'm talking about, the Starry Storry. Yeah, Starry Do Star dou Valley. I think that's what I was a tie in conflating
the two. But yeah, I again just fall back. I think, do you think it's a good time? I mean, no, they're not going to do that, but like PEPSI should just give up I think they have a little bit. I think, yeah, their focus is on mountain dew, like they're seeing the growth probably like the growth lines not really match up for the pet for the actual pepsi beverage.
But yeah, like they're a good good pepsi, like weird like nitro pepsi, where like you there's like a little nitrogen canister that you like carbonate the pepsi with and it's to be actually pretty good. So maybe that's their lanes like more of a niche thing. Yeah, but yeah, pepsi do a liquid nitrogen one so we can all have fun. I mean when I was a kid, like PEPSI was the ship. When I was a kid, like pepsi was cool. I was. I was a pepsi fan. Yeah I didn't. I didn't. I wasn't like when the
people like pepsi, I was like, oh ship. I remember coming in from like playing outside and being really thirsty it was like the summer and just taking a massive pepsi to the dome, just like chugging a can maybe a can and a half of pepsi and that being the first like drug experience in where I was like, I feel incredible at tearing right after garage that had the refrigerator that was fun pepsi. Yeah yeah, all right, well all right for a boomers. That's why I'm saying boomers. Wow, boomer,
I'm not a boomer bae. Also, I'm off pepsi now you know what I mean. So, like you know, I never actually liked it. Wow, baity Now was like your parents. First of all, my mother never let me drink colas. That's why I was always team sprite for whatever reason in her mind, clear soda was somehow the better option.
But this is a crazy fall from the late eighties when Michael Jackson and Madonna were like pepsi people, and like that, something happened in that branding, like that marketing department. They must have maybe taken just obscene swings on talent and they're like, we're gonna fucking create our business if we pay Kendall Jenner another fourteen million dollars to hold a can of sprite up to a CoP's face. Yeah,
canna pepsi, she held a canda sprite up. We actually would none of this would have happened, and she would have solved exactly racism, exactly. All right, We'll be right back, and we're back. We're back, and the orange smoke has come out of the White House and announced a trade deal. I thought you're going to talk about that most beautiful girl thing? Oh enough, did you see that? No? It
so stupid. There's like a sorry, this is like a thing in our dock right now of a trending story where Yahoo is said she was named most beautiful girl in the world at age six. Here's what she looks like at twenty four. It's the dumbest article of like just like this. I don't know who the fuck is saying this is the most beautiful girl of the when she was six years old. That is gross fucking predator shit, not like some guy with an eye for talent, whoever
the fuck named it. But then like they're like, and now she's still a model, great, yeah, right, Like so this person was had an eye for that. Yeah. This story just weirded me out to the extent that I was just going to try and skip it, but I just I couldn't. When I saw those it was just funny because I was like, Okay, what the fuck is going on here with this headline. It's just now I have more questions about who goes around naming the most beautiful children in the world, like we need to fucking
investigate anyone doing that shit. Well, she looks like like the pictures of her when she's six, it looks like she's back in that like beauty uh competition, like child beauty competition shit like Toddler's and Tiaras shit. Which, yeah, that whole thing is so so weird, so broken and strange, and uh it's like Yaho. And by the way, those are the people who think everybody in Hollywood are pedophiles and you know what I mean, like that this is
what they've got going on is on the weekend. Also, this makes sense because Yahoo definitely appeals to like the oldest people on the internet. So for them, they will read a headline like this completely uncritically and be like, what did ever happen to the most beautiful six year old? Right? And then that be it. Anyway, she's fine, she's twenty four. Great, Yeah, there we go, amazing, amazing story, great work, Yahoo. Trade deal. Trump has announced a historic trade deal, more historic than
anything ever. Yeah, it's not much of anything. It's for first of all, like announce a trade deal with China. Okay, not our ninth largest trading partner, like the at least hit the top three. Who's it with with the UK? With the UK? Yeah? Yeah, And you know it's like, first of all, there's still ten percent tariffs on them, so it's like, well, what's the thing They're like emphasizing other industries like AI and biotech and all this other shit. So a lot of people are like, what is this
really and is this just a fig leaf? Like is this an actual deal or we just saying we're claiming victory because we need to claim victory. It feels like they're just claiming victory to claim victory because like, while the market had a slight uptick, this does nothing to actually sort of assuage concerns over what the fuck is going on with the economy and what this trade war
is going to look like. Howard lutnik though, came out and he started trending because again it's sycophant Fridays or Thursdays or Saturday, whatever, it's time for the siccaphans to come out, and this was him talking about how this is the Secretary of Commerce, Howard Lutnix saying how fucking sick this deal is but the president.
And by the way, I want to make this clear, Well, Jamison and.
I worked hard.
This was the president's deal, and people think, oh, that's not the way it works. If you got to sit next to him, I have the best deal maker to my left, and if you don't fit, then we take advantage of him calling the Prime minister getting that deal done. You don't understand who's the president of United States. So he's the closer. He gets deals done that we could never get done because he understands business. He understands deals, and that's why we're here today.
Well okay, Jesus Christ. And by the way, it's almost like it's like written word for word from something that Trump dictated. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's the president. And by the way, uh, the most amazing president of all time. And if you don't know, you don't understand President deals the way he make a deal, so deal that I was even like, you're the closer. Okay, man, it's getting
so weird. I mean it's been weird, but like the just the the fact that every five days they need to have an in person PEP rally for him in front of him, like in front of the media is really weird. It's really weird. It's a weird world. It's fucking fucking sad. So a lot of people are like, we'll see what this fucking deal renders, but this just feels like a lot of just deal for Optic's sake, TBD on what the long term benefits will be for either country. All right, And finally Joe Biden had to
uh had to get his his flowers. It's like everyone talking about this guy funeral Fer, What about my dad funeral I could have won? Yeah, so he a view of it. Yeah, he's like in a reputation management tour and he's got a quote veteran campaign and communications strategist to help him fix his public image. And so his first stop was the View and he claimed that he would have beaten Trump had he run, so like basically just being like, you know, we saw when he dropped out.
He was like, she can't win, man, she stinks man, And it's me baby all day, Joe b And when he dropped out, there was like a massive, like multi digit surge in polling. Like the only reason that it was ever anywhere close was because he dropped out. You And also, to be fair, she ran on the same things you would have ran on too. The reason she lost was because she refused to knife you the way that.
And again, this is just a great you know, Kamala Harris refusing to back away from Joe Biden's terrible policies. Great call on her part, and her advisor's good, great call. You you got absolutely nothing out of it other than a fucking historical loss that completely fucked this country for decades to come. But on the other hand, you have the loyalty of this guy who came out and just fucking knifety on the view right. Yeah, I don't know.
It's just like I don't know why he thinks he needs to resurrect, Like what the why are you on any kind of I mean, he's still got a future of any sort, like not just like not being alive, but I think he thinks he has a future, Like he can run again. Doctor Jill can buy him an Oculus headset and just let him fucking have fun for like twelve hours a day with that thing. I'm sure it'll blow his mind. Just let him just he's old, Okay, Yeah, he's old. He's like, you know, a lot of people
didn't show up. He acts like the depression in turnout had to do with the fact that he wasn't on the ballot, rather than people being so dissatisfied with the direction of the country and having a candidate was not offering anything different main character syndrome. Yeah it was. It was actually all about me. Well, many stories appear to all be about you when they're when you're you. That's just the way that life works. And apparently that optical
illusion never gets any less tricky to certain people. Yeah. Hey, well, like last time I ran, and that looked totally different for me than this time when I didn't run, and this time I lost. Uh oh man. When asked about whether or not the story is about his cognitive decline were true or not, he refuted them and then like rambled for several minutes before his wife had to be like, all right, Joe, let's let's move it. Joe, let's wrap it up. Let's wrap it up. I'm a cognitive decline.
I don't know cognitive I'm behind it. End of it here. This is a little bit and which I won't go into him in interested time, interested time, And we got it done. And you know one of the things that that well, well, you know one of the things. There you go, doctor Jill, come on with Dally, you finish that. You know what Joe's trying to say? I think here that was a question about his cognitive decline, and he fucking trailed off mid sentence. How who is out here
being like, dude, this guy's still got it. We got to get him out there in front of the view. Just a bunch of people who are making money off of this shit, like including the fucking Chris Meager, whoever this strat at the Communic Comms guy he hired, who's just like, yeah, well fucking take a check and tell him I can. I'll convince the world the earth is fucking brown and the sky is orange. Sure. Brian the
Editor asked if he does birthday parties. That is like literally the like he's very predictable, Like he is like a pool string toy, you know, like that, I know
exactly what he's gonna sound like. You ask him a question, he's gonna talk about it for half a sentence, talk about how and we did something about that, We got that done so and then he's gonna stumble a little bit, and then someone's gonna come in and be like dude, and that's I cannot handle powerful old white guy geriatric jazz anymore from please, none of these people say actual things out loud that makes sense. Ever, Trump, It's interesting,
like I feel like they've decided to take over. Like there's a lot more press these days with Donald Trump, where he's not talking and people are talking about him, and he just sits there pleased and allows people to talk about it. That's how you hide up someone's cognitive That's right, Yeah, that's how it's done. And this guy's so smart he's not even saying anything, and don't ask him.
He's falling asleep and is soon all right. Those are some of the things that are trending on this Thursday afternoon. We are back tomorrow with a whole lass episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourselves, get your vaccines where you still can get your flu shot, don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye bye.
The Daily Zeite guist as executive produced by Catherine Law, co produced by Bye Wayne, co produced by Victor Wright, co written by J M McNabb, edited and engineered by Justin Conner and edited and engineered by Brian Jeffries.