What if my thing was that I've been trying to change my Social Security number for like a more esthetically pleasing number.
And it's tubes or something, just like, yes.
Yeah, about the exact numbers to be eight zero eight five, and then that again, actually I've eight.
Zero zero eight right, because you're turning it upside down?
Yeah, exactly, Bless, I guess any times?
Oh yeah, yeah, damn. How many numbers is that? Because so social Security Damn dude, how many numbers is that? I'm just impressed by. No, I'm just wondering if there is somebody with the social Security number bobless but also impressed by anytime someone gives me a phone number, I'm like, damn, dog, how many numbers was that?
Numbers?
Slow down? Man? What is that? How do you keep shreck of all these? So I just counted on my fingers. There's nine on the Social Security number. B O O B L E s STA.
We're one short, yeah, one put an Erica like you know.
You can do boo bliss? Yeah, you know, all right, that's plenty for you. Just enough.
It's a freezing cold open. Someone say too much.
Some would.
People with industry experience would say that's too much.
Hello the Internet, and welcome to season three, eighty nine, episode five of Derdaly's I Guess It's a production of Iiheart Radio. It's a podcast where you take a deep dive into America share consciousness. And it's Friday, May twenty third, twenty twenty five. My name is Jack O'Brien aka I drink warm milk in the shower above my chestay my hands,
guzzle that shit for hours. Alpha bros don't understand that one, courtesy a fashionable dinosaur on the discord in reference to I'm going anti grind set bros, who are like all about the quick cold shower, I'm all about returning to the womb via hours long warm showers where I drink some warm milk, and yeah.
That's fantastic. That's We'll talk about drinking a beer in the shower, but drinking a whole gallon of milk in the shower.
Is warm milk until you fall asleep in the warm shower eight percent milks. And it's actually good for the environment. There's a certain point at which you leave the warm water on for so long that it becomes good for the environment somehow, I agree. Anyways, I'm thrilled to be joined by today's guest co host, a writer and act and comedian whose newest special, Daddy Lung Legs is a
mustwash and available on YouTube. The coiner of the disgusting phrase plumpers to describe his thighs, It's Blake Wexland.
This is Blake Wexor aka. I'm gonna blake till the midnight hour. That's when my legs come tumbling out. I'm gone to blake till the midnight hour because these thighs, they are so round. Thank you. I swave it or not. This might shock you, but that came from my head. I wrote, really, Yes, the Lord did that, God did.
God is speaking through me.
God that's right, which is mightier some would say. And this sword I have and came up with right there, that is Today's a good brain day for.
Me, Blake. We're thrilled to be joined in Arisquar seats by someone who called you blakey to day, which is now what I will be calling you. Uh. A very sunny comedian, actor and Emmy nominated writer who's written for a good mythical morning. Reductress Brockmeier. You've seen them everywhere from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival to the latest season of Girls five EV please welcome back to the show.
I don't have a song today, but I'll just double down on Blakey Blakey. I didn't even realize I did that until you said that Blake's name. I think Blake and I actually met on the Cracked podcast, right, yeah, I think you guy.
Episode of the Cracked podcast. Yeah, at that u UCB side.
When I was producing then, yeah, wild.
So fun.
And then there was one.
Time You're a guest right on that episode Blake.
I was producing. Was I on there? I know we were on one together.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Those were great. But I my blaky blaky heart. Sorry, that's a good one, my heart.
I have an anecdote about Blake. I always remember because I went this was like a random, like pre pandemic, one of those late night bar shows that were weekly that nobody comes to you or whatever. Do you remember there's a public house and then you were about to go on and I was like you have to go last and whatever. It was like I'm like so sorry whatever, You're like, no, it's all good. And then you texted me, but you were trying to text your wife.
Oh my god.
But it was like so sweet. But you were like I'm so sorry, honey boo, like like I'm almost done, I'll be right, sir, I'm missing you, and like but it was funny because you had just like been like oh so so fine and then turned away and texted and I just get this mess like from Blake's like like I miss you, and it was so cute. It was like, you know, it was just a very sweet message.
But I was like for me, that was actually for you.
I'm giving you.
Oh my god, that's the moral the story place inappropriate with.
They're just like, no, that was just nice to you. No, No, I'm sorry you got up on stage five.
I misread the room. No, it is that is a sweet thing of like because it could go either way of like oh you could get a window into someone's life and it is the scene is not nice and uh yeah, No, I had a great That was always such a fun show. It was in the back of the public House and like that was the only show I could walk to in La and it was still like uphill, so I would be soaked I could get in there. But I'm like, no, I need to walk to shows with it if it's within like two miles. But yeah,
oh that's sweet. I forgot about that story.
That's cool.
But it made me realize because I'm you know, like I'm just out and about and now I'm in a relationship. But I'm like those kind of moments give me like now with that I'm in a relationship, like little markers of like oh, those are like nice things to have, like keeping your partner updated and when you're out like doing shows like that, because I feel like when I was younger, I didn't have those models and I was just thinking when I when you're texting me at like yeah,
it's funny. Now that I'm married and I'm thinking about that, but just like, oh, that was such a like kind of little core memory of like, oh, that's like what a good relationship is. It's just up to it's like, Okay, I'm gonna be a little late, but you know, just an update my partner, miss you will be home soon.
Yeah, that's that was really nice.
Yeah you aren't like I'm gonna be late and I don't want to hear it. Okay, yeah, I'm going to be late and then I'm gonna go to the strip club and then I'm gonna go I have to do.
Drugs in the park, you know, Yeah it was I did go home after the show, but yeah, no, I guess it makes sense where you're like for us, like we're so used to being out late. But then you know, if you have like a partner who doesn't who isn't you know, like that's not part of their second nature. It's like, oh, yeah, by the way, this, I could be home at this time, or I could be home later. So yeah, that's cool. Thank you for telling that story.
That is Blake's an inspiration to us all.
Yes, thank you.
Well, I'm thrilled to have both of you here today. T T. We're going to get to know you a little bit better in a moment. First, we're gonna tell listeners a couple of those stories we're talking about today. The Enhanced Games are coming to Vegas, that is Olympics where you're allowed to do performance enhancing drugs. That those are going to happen in Las Vegas in twenty twenty six thanks to wrestling. Yeah, it's like wrestling, ww right,
I don't know they could have made it cool. Like, well, we'll talk about it, it's being Russians, it's being funded by Donald Trump Junior, and it's like one of these like those all the worst you know, libertarian tech bros are into it, And before like really digging into it, I was like, I mean, you know, broke clocks right every once in a while. This is intriguing, I am.
You know, the question that is begged by all of the like you know, performance enhancing drug testing around the Olympics is like, how cool would this be if they were allowed to just like do stuff that made them like fucking vibrate off of the planet Earth. But I think there's some issues. Ways, we'll talk about that. We'll talk about a punk band that just released an album
that smells like Wyneth Poutraw's Vagina Candle. We will talk about the next Mission Impossible movie, and just generally the politics of Tom Cruise movies, all of that plenty more. But first, T T Lee, we like to ask our guest, what is something from your search history that's revealing about who you are?
Oh gosh, this has just happened this morning. So I googled how to undo delete in a contact on your iPhone because and this is I'm exposing me, I am like, you know those reddits when they're like, am I the asshole? I'm one hundred percent of asshole, just gonna be out of there.
But my I'm a much less popular reddit thing.
I'm definitely the asshole here, and you know what, And I honestly it's okay. Sometimes you got to be the asshole. And but this is what I did because my my husband met with and I'm not gonna get into the whole story, but anyways, he met with an ex who I said you should meet with her because she had reached out and after a long time, I'm not talking and this was like whatever you know there, This was
a lot of childhood thing. But they met and then they like met for a while and everything was fine. But I when he came home, I realized. I was like, and now I think you should never talk to her again. Like that's how I felt like. I didn't feel that before. But then I was like, sounds like that was that's good. And I said you should delete her number, and he like didn't want to, but I was like he laughed,
and I was like, okay, whatever, delete her number. That this morning I still was like, you should delete your number. So then I said, can you give me your phone? And he was so trusting he just gave it to me and I deleted it and he got very upset and he was like, that was very rude, which it was, but I did want the number off of his phone. But then after I saw how he was and I betrayed, the trust was because I don't think he expected me
to do that, which I thought. I mean, that's like what I what do you think I'm going to do? I'm asking? Yeah, So then I.
Do phone, Yeah, I don't have you're going to delete that number off?
The fuck?
I felt very bad. So then I did google it and you just shake your phone and it comes back.
But yeah, shaking the phone thing is so weird that they're just like the way to like do jump back at step on your phone. It's just like shake it like motherfucker. Yeah. I always feel violent. I always. I'm like you always. Yeah, there's no real like cool way to do it. Always. Yeah. So yeah, I'm glad that you're agreeing that you're the asshole in that situation.
I will say when I when I put it back on his phone, I did say because at first he was like, that's fine, and then I was like, no, it'll mean more when you do it. So I do still expect him to delete it at some point.
Will when you do it is so good? I was gonna say it's it was a lot that you did, like a mission impossible style break into his ex's house to delete his number off her phone. That was impressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and on that level, it like kind of wraps back around to just being awesome again. Yeah, right right.
We had to cut that part of the story for time, but there was a whole thing and yeah.
Involved, yeah, what is something you think is underrated?
Underrated? I wrote down two things. I wrote down sex streams and landing page websites, which I just missed, like going somewhere online, like you know when you like log on and now it's all social media, but I'm like, I just want to go to a page like how kind of how like how cracked was or you know that you.
Had a page that you just were like, what are they up to?
You can hang out and stuff and it's not just news, it's things, and yeah I missed that. I don't know if there's a place everyone's hanging out, but I am not invited, So let me know if there's a website we're all hanging out at that isn't our own social media's. And then also sex streams because I don't know, I just uh, and maybe this is a merry thing, but
I feel like I have less sex streams. But then recently I did have one and I was like, oh, these are fun, and I think I had more of them when I was younger, in my twenties, and maybe I am just dating myself because I'm getting older, but I.
Don't know, they're underrated.
I feel like when we were younger, we're like, oh, sex rooms are funny, but now as an adult, you're like, I don't know, they add some liveliness to your night, Like why not watch a raunchy movie while you're in bed? Why not wake up and feel nice. I don't know. It's a little different for my automatic. My anatomy is a little different for you guys than you guys I think, so it might have different consequences for all of you out there. But I wake up and you know, I
can just start my day. I don't feel like do any laundry.
So it's like that term like sober people use, like a free lapse where like if you have like like surgery or something, you have to like go under some medicine where it's like that, but with married people where it's like cheating for free.
Saying who the sex rooms were about? Okay, no, but just in general, like it's just the idea of a Yeah, it's just fun to be like, yeah, because I think when you're with someone's like different because you don't have the newness of like like discovering something. So yeah, yeah, sex dreams are underrated.
That's interesting, Yeah, because you do just travel to a different world, like it seems real, and then you wake up, You take off your breathing machine.
We all take off our breathing machine. We surface to the level of the black goo that we submerged ourselves in as we go to sleep at night.
Yeah, rise from my coffin.
Yeah, exactly. I love the ideas. Blake and I are constantly having wet dreams late. Yeah, I'm just kind.
You only took one class in an eighth grade about the male body, and that's that's where we stopped.
I'm burning through three pairs of boxers a night over on this.
And you do mean yeah, yeah, it's a problems.
Ye dreams are crazy that we just have movies and sometimes our brains, Like, here's a porno one for you, have a great night. What is something you think is overrated?
Okay, I wrote this down and I was like, people might get mad, but it just came from because I didn't have time to like, I just like this is from the gut. I think the Brina Carpenter is overrated. Oh I know, and I'm already like regretting saying it, but it is my truth and I don't even like
It's not that I don't like her. I just I think there's this like stardom that happens now that I think she's great, but I think the level of stardom that happens in the few years to become these megastars because of I don't know, digital consumption, it feels blown out of proportion compared to the artists we saw growing up that like we've tracked over career and watched them
really rise and hone their talent. But specifically it's a Brina Carpenter, but she kind of represents that from I don't know, because I see her everywhere and she's cool, but like I I don't I don't know. I'm just like, why is she that big? She's fine. I feel like I'm gonna I'm already saying this and I'm gonna like get backlash. But you know, I think she's overrated. I
don't think she's a bad singer. I just when I hear her early stuff, I don't hear like she didn't find her voice for a while, and now her whole thing has just kind of being like she's got a look and she's funny, which I think is cool, But like as a singer, I don't really know, like I don't really know where her voice is.
Mm hmmm. It is weird, like who gets anointed the next thing where I'm sure there's like a hundred, you know, like Cybrina Carpenter Ayprina Carpenter Bees, you know, like like a bunch of different ones. So but I'm but I think she's great.
I like her.
I just she's so big or maybe I'm maybe I'm just getting a lot of it on TikTok, but I am getting a level of Sabrina makes it look like she's like Brittany, and I don't feel like she's our Brittany. Like I don't think she's there. Unless I'm being naive, but I feel like we saw, like, you know, like and before Brittany, there's a Madonna, and people compared Brittany to Madonna, and they compared her early and I think she rose to that. So maybe Sabrina will rise to that.
But I feel like she's getting that kind of exposure where I'm not seen as an artist. It feels like manufacturer, like the people around her like, let's keep making money off of this person, as opposed to like she's like, this is what I want to do next.
Yeah, no, in Jack that Sabrina Carpenter is a pop star.
Who is She's not a Carpenter. Sorry, I was over here at Google. I'm trying to find out trying to find some of her work. She's yeah, she has a.
Neo baby, she's related to Jesus.
Yeah, like Nick Offerman. And then I was trying to find out if this was another one of these Carpenters. I know, I don't know enough about Sabrina Carpenter to like hold day strong opinion. I know the song is pressed, and I know Miles was just talking about the fact that there's a part of that song where she goes Kazama singer.
And see, I do like that those little moments she has some funny I think she's getting into like she's exploring her voice and that funny part is coming out more.
But yeah, but yeah, it does feel like, you know, the eighties monoculture where it was like Madonna and Michael Jackson and that's plenty. We have all the we have all the artists that we need, and then it's been just like a fracturing into like all the pieces of those artists just like break out into different musicians and they all become big and everybody buys all the albums, and I don't know, it seems to be working out for them, but I feel you.
I do hope it's working out for them. I mean, I think it's working out for her. But it does scare me about the industry a bit, because I think it's becoming more and more the same people behind the scenes making money and they'll just throw her away or put someone else new out there and hopefully she you know, it's savvy. But it does scare me a bit the way they turn people out.
You typically a fan of, like is Brittany. The previous version of this that you're like, this is, this is how it's done, this is and I don't look I'm swist.
I went to Taylor's, so I don't you know, I'm not like here to like I'm not saying like, oh my god, Sabrina Carpenter a girly pop like that's not really what I'm trying to say, but I think I don't know, maybe it's something. Wow, this feels like therapy, maybe something more sinister. I feel about the industry like it's like as it's falling apart and they're taking away
from new independent artists. They are also like slapping, like you know, people like Sabrina, she's going to make a lot from it, but they're not necessarily have her best interests at her. And I feel like you see that with Chaperone, but she's more vocal about it. But it feels like there's something like crumpling in the back and that scares me. And meanwhile, everyone's just like money, money, you give me more. But no, to answer your question,
I love pop, all right. I mean I had a podcast about Ariana Grande, so that's right.
Yeah, sorry, on a ground day, is the is the truth? And Sabrina Carpenter is.
Against each other. No, I'm not going to pick a.
Woman against you can like both.
But Ariana's voice, I will say, it's very consistent from the beginning. Like you hear her voice and it's like, you're like, that's why that that needs to be recorded?
Yeah? Yeah, I hear her sing and I'm like, why she got to show off like that? Yeah, but she's a She's a great singer, Serena Carpenter. The only other thing I'm aware of, other than because I'm a singer, is the there seems to be a meme linking her as like the Hillary Clinton via with the substance, Like if if Hillary Clinton took the substance, she would be super Carpenter.
I have not seen that, and that is interesting.
I see that a lot.
To me, I see that a lot.
I see that. I see it everywhere I see it. Ever, anyways, let's take a quick break and we'll come back and we'll talk about the Enhanced Games. We'll be right back and we're back, And had you guys heard of this? The enhanced Games? An Olympics where a substance, Yeah, basically
the Olympics on steroids. Literally, my first thought on this is They're like, it's terrible that our world is run by a bunch of men who are developmentally emotional and mental children, Like it's bad in so many ways, and then like there will be like the occasionally fun thing that happens, and I don't think we should deny ourselves the ability to look at the fun thing and be like, well, at least this is a thing that we can look
at in horror and be entertained by. I don't think it's actually going to be entertaining however, on the execution, but just generally, I feel like I'm grouping this in in the world with like Alcatraz being opened again by Donald Trump and military parade, just like things that like five to eleven year old boys are going to be like yo, sick. You know, it is interesting.
He's so close with I don't know if he still is, but with Vince bookmahon, but like it really feels like one of those like it's like entertainment sports, right, which is like, ww did that really well? For whatever? You know, all their controversies, but they're basically like what if we could just do all of this? It's you know, they're these strong men on drugs and make them do cool things. Are crazy.
Yeah, it is a step away from like, oh, we could have a guy fight a gorilla, you know, like we can have I think this is like.
The hundred guys and a gorilla.
One hundred guys in a gorilla, because they can't do that, because even they for some reason can't find a loophole into like beating on animals. That's their next thing.
I can't trump.
That's the fourth trunk, the fourth Reich. And so they are like, okay, like why don't we just juice up these guys. When you said five to eleven year old boys, I thought you were gonna say five foot eleven men. Is just men who are five foot eleven almost six feet and to get that extra inch, they're gonna get jacked up on steroids and it's.
It's dangeroussles at the bottom of their feet. Can see them rising up as they Yeah, I don't know. It's obviously intriguing when when you see how adamant the Olympic committees are about like they're not being drugs and you know, drug testing, It's like, man, so like what but what if? What if?
Not?
Like what if we were able to just see what those people would do. I think the two problems with this actually being as fun as it seems like in theory it would be. One. Obviously, it's like really bad for the people's health. Blah blah blah. It's gonna hurt people.
A lot of athletes like will take it take steroids off season, right, this is kind of a thing. I mean, maybe not Olympics because they're so they have to like be ready to be tested at any point. But I'm guessing what this league people are going to push the limits and not.
Just do it. Yeah, this is the main reason that I don't think it's gonna works. It's that everybody already cheats. Yea, like the actual Olympic athletes. When you hear people who like understand how the sport works, almost in every instance, they're like, yeah, no, it's just you have to be an incredible athlete and very good and sophisticated at cheating, Like those are the two things that make you a
good Olympic athlete. And so I think what this is going to reveal is probably just that like all Olympians are already juicing or like already using performance enhancing drugs. Just they they can't use them like right up to the starting gun, but they do use them, and you know, there are ways to get around the testing. And then you're also having to choose from a pool of athletes who are just like willing to be like yeah, fuck it, I don't got anything else going on, you know, because
they can't go back on the right. Yeah. Once you do this, you're basically giving up the dream. So I feel like it's probably not going to be not going to be the highest level of athlete. So I feel like it'll just like even out and you'll end up with people who are about as good as It'll just be like the Olympics, but like.
Regular people who want to be Olympians.
Yeah. Yeah, everyone the Olympics, but everyone's eyes are yellow like whatever and tiny balls. Yeah.
It reminds me of like you know, those comedy shows where they'd be like, oh, everyone's stoned or everyone's drunk, everyone's on mushrooms. Yeah, there is something like you said, like entertaining about like Okay, let's all get in the ring and everyone's just gonna like cheat and see what happens. But it's uh less about the sports medical supervision. Yeah,
there's like yes, exactly like the comedy shows, you know. Yeah, like that video I did for Cracked when Jack was my boss who was responsible for that by the way.
But yeah, I was like, which one of you am I gonna have to drug to get a hit video here?
But it does make me think, like what if they did stuff like that for Like what if they did like science and posiums and everyone was on acid and mushrooms, Like that would be cool. Let's watch a bunch of like Nata people space people get high and talk about space.
You know, much better because yeah, we're talking about steroids. But that's a good point. Like what if there is a street drug?
Oh yeah, could you just be on molly and like I'm gonna do the triple job.
Like that's what it should be, like it should be
like just any drug. But like they're specific because it's being run by like Donald Trump Junior is one of the funders, so they're like, we will be doing absolutely no illicit drugs and any enhancement routines will be done like strictly like with doctor supervision, which I guess again, yeah, like good, probably better for the health of the people they have Also, like you know, because it's being run by people who are generally pretty incompetent, like Donald Trump Junior,
Like they don't know that this is the one like fun idea they have. They're just gonna like do a bad job with this one as well. And so the only the only things that are like part of it so far are swimming, sprinting, and lifting, which don't feel like they're gonna be much different to watch, Like watching a swimming race where people are on like even the best that sounds like they're gonna be like launching out
of the pool like dolphins. You know, it's just like a normal swimming race at like one point one speed at best case scenario. You know, reading is one.
I want to see, Like I don't know, something where there's a contact sport.
You know, yeah, like baseball in like, because that's my reference for it, was like in the early two thousands, it was like steroids were rampant in baseball, and if you look back on it, you're like, oh, yeah, that guy's a steroids. That guy's head grew, like you see
it before or after, it's like, oh it's head. It's twice the size that you can't grow ahead, you know, Yeah, go ahead, No, And I was just going to say that I don't know if like those I almost called them exercises, those sports that you outlined aren't like, uh, like you don't want to be a big, massive, roided out guy in a pool, like you'll sink. You know,
you'll try, so like weightlifting makes sense. But I feel like that's their mistake is that if you're gonna do this moronic thing, just make it all like big buff buff daddy, you know, stuff like weird shit like that. And professional wrestling there should be a professional who acts the best.
Yeah, there should just be like person throwing where they're just like spin someone around and then try and toss them as far as they can. But just like go like, don't if you're going to do this, go full World Wrestling Federation or Entertainment or whatever the fuck it's called. You know, like bring in man as a as a consultant, Donald Trump Junior. It does feel like, I don't know, he's like a walking restaurant idea from a cocaine binge.
So but I feel like this doesn't have enough cocaine energy like that in execution, like the idea has cocaine energy, but then the execution is just like and we're gonna have like scientific you know rigor to this to see, like they did a test swim, like they they did some early preliminary things with athletes who are willing to do it, and like they used you know, enhancement routine and like somebody one of the swimmers like came close to or like might have like slightly beat a world record.
But they also had like some illegal like wetsuit on. So it's just like there's a lot of there's like a lot of things you can do. It's like, you know, if they.
Should do a no rules one, if that's the whole idea, right, yeah, then we just like have rockets, sneakers, just fast. It is interesting that they're trying to present it as like a like a competitor for the Olympics, because that's a lot of the news that I'm on BBC. They're talking about how it'll be they expect it or you know this. Most people were saying like we think it'll be Olympics,
and then you can also play in this league. And it's like I don't think like you're saying Jack, like if it really is just all these rules, but you can dope up. I don't think it's going to have the appeal of Olympics, but if it is so different where it's like anything goes fire, like sabotage your opponents, you know, Like I mean I probably wouldn't watch it, but like somebody would, you know, that's like my god death games.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Here's here's another thought too, where it's like I don't even know if I made this joke earlier. I'm not I'm not well in my head, but I if I didn't say this, it reminds me of like because Russia got banned from a couple Olympics because all their athletes were doping. So I wonder if this is another way, like if this ends up being another way for Trump to kiss Russia's ass where all the athletes are just Russian Russian athletes because they're juicing anyway, and you know.
They're the best, the best. Yeah, it is like a very Trump world idea, and like he the guy who is behind it, is like I've had the great fortune of you know, just like doing all the ass kissing of like the Trump administration and how great it is for America.
So what sport would you So if you could have like superpowers to be really good at one sport? Which one would you compete in?
Superpowers to be really good at one of these sports?
Or you could have yeah, like the flowers for Aldronon. I guess if you could do steroids, But I'm not because I don't really know how steroids affect each sport. But let's say you're like suddenly good at one of these you could cheat, which which one would you do?
It's a great question. I think it would probably be sprinting, right, sprinting, swimming, or lifting, weightlifting? I mean, yeah, probably sprinting, Like that's just I feel like that comes in candy so so much. Maybe weight, like being strong is like a real superpower, Like that's so yeah.
I feel like because you're always at the edge, I feel like that's the problem with it. People watch you lift it, but if you're lifting out your limit, you always feel tired, right, like you're not like this is lazy, Like you're always going to be pushing yourself.
But I would do I would be like a fucking couches and stuff all the time.
Just you would you just work for a moving company, that's what you want to do.
It's like I wanted to do.
Can't really help run the house moving they multiple hurdles at the same time. Yeah, did you really?
I did?
I was not very good. Uh, and then I ended up just quitting track to do dance, which was a much better fit for me. But I was like, I had good form, so they would always be like, but I wasn't fast, so when I ran, I just would end up either having good form or sacrificing that and just hitting every hurdle and running.
Slowly.
I was like a dancer, so I was like, you know, perfectly straight leg bend behind me, but it was like slow and graceful. So I did not place well. But hurdles is fun. I think I would do archery if I could do, because it's just the feeling of the Olympic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess not one of these running. Maybe swimming, that.
Would be funny. If the one that like has changed the most by performing dancing is.
Everyone makes everything.
Yeah, I do have a new I feel like. The sport at the last Olympics that went up the most in my estimation was the pistol shooting, the target shooting, where that one guy just like did it with like a hangover and his hand in his pocket and jeans like the the really like advanced people had like all this equipment on that like stabilized their arm and like these like weird future like RoboCop glasses that were like
only on one eye. And then this guy just like came up and with like just looking like stepped on ship literally like had the had the energy of John McClean and Diehard being like, my wife just left me. And then in the postgame interview he was like, my wife just left me, and she took the dog, she took the gun, she took the family gun with her.
So I put this gun.
Yeah, anyways, that that would be a fun one, I don't think. I guess probably useful to be good at in this modern day and age.
Harder, shoot hard, so hard.
Yeah, let's let's talk about this new punk album that I'm not familiar with the band. I am familiar with the scent of the album, though you personally, unfortunately not personally. I've just had to do it the way everybody else has and spend thousands of dollars to buy one of these candles. I actually didn't know the second like I knew the first act of this story that Gwyneth Paltrow put a candle on the market in Goop that was
called this candle smelled like my vagina. I did not know that it sold out so fast that they're like a black market sprung up and it was like going for seven hundred and fifty dollars a candle afterwards, How.
Could you even trust that because like if you buy it from Goop, you know it's from Goop, that someone could just be like this is the group, you know candle, And if you've never smelled it before, how would you even know if it was a fake?
Great point. I think it was like a resale market, like the way that like sneakers.
Like you could just fake it, like this smells like vagina. How are you going to know?
It's a weird authentication job. You know, It's like, could I please authenticate the sneakers? I have to authenticate these disgusting.
That's what Chris Martin's up to these days. Cold Player last album kind of flopped, So I'm just authenticating candles. But yeah, this punk band is called let Me See Yeah now so she Paltrow was recently talking about the candle at the recent Manifesting summit, which I feel like, Blake, you were at the Manifesting summit, right or you were supposed to like give a keynote there.
It was such a blur and it's such a fun weekend, and yeah, it just goes by so quickly. I wish it was longer, but I was. I was there for all the Manifesting.
Yeah, so we got a little insight into how the product came about. That product is so fascinating because we were messing around with different scents one day and I smelled something and I was like, oh, that smells like you know which I feel like you named the candle. This smells like my vagina. So you don't need to, like, what are you talking about censor it when you're talking
about it in the interview. But then she said that she feels like selling that candle was punk rock because women's sexuality is like supposed to be shameful, and so she was like, I think it'd be funny if I did this, which, sure, I don't know that selling a seventy five dollars candle is necessarily punk rock. But so there's this punk group in Australia, Private Function. They have a new album that is the shrugging hands up emoji like Sideway smile, and it has a scratch and sniff
center that makes it smell like Gwyneth Paltrow's vagina. They literally had they hired a perfumery from Paris to like look into this and make sure that it actually like had all the elements of the candle. And they're saying this is for class solidarity. You know, you shouldn't have to be rich to have something in your house that smells like Gwyneth Paltrow's vagina, which is a great respect. You've always said that, Blake, is this a pop band? Yeah?
Sorry, no, no, no, no, no, Jack's right. I do always say that.
Now please, Yes, you've been saying that is this punk band?
Uh?
Female punk band?
Or yes?
Male?
Yeah? Private punk? That's good.
That helps, That does help, That does help.
Yeah, that would not be great. Just a sweaty guy. The guitarist said, this was potentially the greatest thing any speaking of the candle, the greatest thing anyone had ever done, and everyone at private function was beyond impressed. We immediately tried to buy one, but due to the overwhelming demand, it sold out instantly. They now sell for over seven
hundred dollars each. Seven hundred dollars to smell Gwyneth Paltrow's vagina is quite frankly classist, and we at private function think that every working class person deserves to have access to that smell twenty four hours a day. So congratulations to everyone lucky enough to score a goopy record. You now own a scratch and sniff record that smells like Gwyneth Paltrow's vagina, So you know, it's a beautiful punk.
Rock smell chained if you scratch it a lot.
Yeah, that's a great question. Yeah, I am possible to say because I just got mine, so I've only scratched it for like twenty four hours in a row.
But right, I wonder of the music, so you if it's timed with me, like, you can't do it. You can't scratch it while you're listening to it, so there's no there's no crossover function. It's just dual, dual utility.
That's a good question. I put pants on mine because I'm a bit of a prude, so you know, and I also left it out in the sun, so it doesn't really yeah, but yeah, keep it, keep it in a cold, dark place.
It's interesting that I never heard her quote about the punk rock because I agree with you Jacket's like, the whole idea of Goop is not punk rock. But it's interesting to hear a frame like that because I think when it first came out, I just said the same thoughts everyone else did, which is like, why and she's
just doing her weird woo woo wellness thing. But there's something there is something interesting about the idea of like, you know, neutralizing how people feel, or not neutralizing, but like owning the idea that, especially if she grew up in Hollywood when when it was much more misogynists. Well arguably right, but just like you know, people making just even comedy clubs jokes about fishy vaginas and things like
that and smells and so there. I think that that does make me like her a little more for doing that, But I also do think that it's not punk rock. But because.
Yeah, exactly, I like the quote. I wish it wasn't about a candle that costs seventy five dollars, but I wish it wasn't made at the Manifesting Company, right, which probably, like you know, requires three thy five hundred dollars to like just attend at the lowest level where they like throw food at you instead of like feed you.
But you are allowed to do drugs at that one.
So yes, yes, that is true. The best. I like to go to the manifesting conference and just take E. Let's uh, let's take a quick break. Well I'll take E and we'll be back to talk about Mission impossible and we're back.
God, that's good.
Eat.
Yeah, that is that is for sending that over.
Color.
Been called molly for like twenty years. What I call it because I'm old back hey, speaking of being old, I do. There's a new study out of the UK where they asked people sixteen to twenty one years old would they rather live in a world without the Internet, like if they could just have no digital technology, would they? And forty six percent said they would rather be young in a world without the Internet altogether. And I'm curious what, just to get everybody's thoughts on, would you take that
like I think I would? Would you take it all back now, just like hard reset to analog technology circa like I don't know. Nineteen ninety two.
Was the question was it be young without inn? Was that the question without it.
Just like not every the Internet goes away.
Tomorrow, I would not. I mean, I think there's a lot of issues at the Internet. I do really love and I think it defines our specific millennial generation growing up with it. I mean I went to computer camp when I was like seven at Stanford, and so very much was like like it was cool to watch the Internet unfold and see, you know, all it's maybe gotten out of hand now, but there was something really cool about like plugging into the world as everyone was plugging
into each other. That was very exciting and I feel like as a core part of our generation. But yeah, I didn't have TikTok when I was in middle school, thank god. And I wouldn't do middle school with YouTube or TikTok because yeah, so I think we had a limited amount of Internet and that was good. So maybe I don't know, maybe I would control the amount of Internet.
Yeah.
I think we're the age too of like we might be the best generation to ask this for because we are like right in the middle where we do like remember a more analog life, but we had both, Like I do think about for you, like with your kids, I think being a kid right now with the Internet, like you know, with social media and stuff, is a fucking that's so scary to me. And I don't know how you do it with like you know, how you
control that with your kids, Jack. But I think being young now with the Internet, like with the Internet the way it is, I would be like, oh, that's scary to me. Yeah, but I'm with you t t that I would still want it, Like I would still keep the Internet even with all that all the.
Yeah, there's like a lot of ways that it cuts out the gatekeepers and you know, all the like monoculture like bullshit where like just a handful of you know, white guys have all the power to like tell people like make decisions about what people watch and stuff. But there's just so many, so many ways. It's it's probably just a thing where we're like early stages of getting this right and we just it's just very wrong right now.
But maybe there would be like a reset, reset in terms of the way we use it, you know, because there was a lot of stuff like we did well like before YouTube became this giant conglomerate and that's you know, it's all ads. You were discovering really silly songs and playing them for our friends and just literally, like I remember college parties were just playing YouTube videos for each other and that like that felt punk rock at the time.
It's like, you know, I don't know, it was interesting, like there was something we were discovering together, which I don't think is how people use the internet now.
So yeah, yeah, yeah, have you seen that movie Hannah where the guy like raises his daughter out in the wilderness, was like no technology and stuff like that. I'm not that bad, but like I'm pretty uh, I don't really have my kids on screens very much because yeah, it just seems seems precarious.
Well, give you basically give children like a microphone to the whole world when you and a receiver, right when you give them social media, and it's like we wouldn't just put children or adults, but we wouldn't just put anyone on TV or on the radio when they're like five into the talk, you know. But that's what that's what happening. Access to social media and the internet is like for children.
I think there are also better pop culture examples than the movie Hannah, where the guy trains his daughter to be a killer. She's like, I don't know if the world class assassin who just like doesn't have the Internet, and I'm like, yeah, so I'm pulling that thing from it and then a real career.
How do you control their use of internet? They're your oldest your kids aren't school.
They're nine and seven.
Yeah yeah, yeah, so limited outside of the home, because I feel like once they're in school, they're sort of like that's how do you control that?
Yeah, you just have to like talk to your teachers and they I mean they're they're generally not on the internet, like obviously they use like some screens for education. But yeah, no, no fun answer to this other than just like yeah, you I wasn't.
Allowed to watch MTV. But I would just like like.
We're going to be that family like that. That's I'm realizing, Like my cousins grew up in a house where like they didn't have a TV, and like they I would like tell my friends about it. I'd be like, I have cousins who like don't have a TV like in their house. They just like don't have one, and everyone's
like what the fuck? And that's like kind of I think what my kids are gonna end up being like because I'm just not gonna get them phones or you know, I'll get them like flip phones, and they won't walkie talkies. Be on the internet. Yeah, they'll be all like make stuff, but they can't be like on the internet on social media and shit, because it just seems bad. I don't I have yet to hear somebody who's like, it's actually really cool for them, Like it's really good for the kids.
That's the thing too, because like it gets rid of the gatekeepers, which is great, but then you see these like white supremacist twitch streamer people and it's like, well, not everybody needs a voice, Like that guy doesn't need a voice for sure. This person who's not a doctor who's giving medical advice is not to serve a voice. So yeah, that's that's the part of it. That's the double edged sword.
Great pronunciation of swords.
Thank you so much. I was allowed to watch v H one, but I couldn't watch to watch MTV. Yeah, that was the rule.
That's a that's a line that I feel like a lot of people. I could only.
Watch PBS and not Cartoon Network or any of the other cartoons. But I do think that's why I love like I was, I love writing kids animation, and I still very much look at like cartoons right now as like entertaining as an adult. And I think part of that is because it tapped into my independence. Whenever I was allowed to watch Cartoon Network, it be like at a friend's house or like my grandma's you know, but
just never at home. And I don't know, there's something about like I wonder what are these kids will be like when they're older and what they'll connect to the Internet.
Yeah, Like I think parents who like wouldn't let people watch MTV were like wrong in our generation, and I'm like going to be that parent, going to be like no YouTube, But it just it freaks me out a little bit. I mean I'm also like at the very beginning here.
So yeah, well, there are a lot of bad actors on the internet targeting children, and that I think that is a bigger problem than before because with MTV, it's like you might say, like, oh, the back for the kids, but there was like you know, curation and executives and people held responsible. And now there are like actual bad actors, actual Nazis, yeah, yeah, and propaganda and robots and things that are actively targeting young minds that don't know how to discern.
M hm.
Well, speaking of propaganda, we should talk about the latest Mission Impossible is coming out this weekend. It's the final Mission Impossible.
If you believe, by the way, than you should get the AI function where you look like Tom Cruise.
Yeah, this is actually just an AI version of Jack. It's not it's not actually me. They just like this Jack. Yeah, it's a new it's a new function that they've added.
This one so much better.
Jack's sick. But the first movie came out in nineteen ninety six. This is gonna be the final one. Obviously, the first movie was dated by like landlines and floppy disks, but it was ahead of its time in that John Voight plays a complete piece of shit. So it was the first time that we got to see John Voight as the human monster that he actually is.
Now, that's a bad actor, go ahead, Jack.
Hey, and that is a bad actor before the Internet. But people asked Tom Cruise, he's been like kind of all over the place, do we think, did you guys see him eating popcorn?
Did you see what it was like?
He just like whips like an individual piece of popcorn at his mouth, like want at a time in like quick succession, and it's just like, yeah, and try and picture the most intense way to eat popcorn that you could possibly imagine, and that's obviously what he's doing. I'm curious if that was a thing where they were like, hey, could you like do something weird with the popcorn? We
feel like that will get people talking about you. Because he's also like this is on the same tour where he's like climbing rooftops and fucking like jumping out of planes and just trying to kill himself over and over again in fun entertain ways. Yeah, but somebody was like, oh, is this gonna be you know, this movie is made all over the place and like lots of different locations. Will it be affected by the tariffs? And he was like, we'd rather answer questions about the movie thank you and
thank you. But he he's like weirdly a political Like he's been in things that clearly have a political bench, like the Top Gun movies are essentially funded by the Pentagon, and but they're also like the second always a.
Faceless, right, Isn't that a whole point he makes is like there's like, I mean, it feels very like obviously American military propaganda. But he'll stay never fighting.
They're fighting, they're just enemy.
Yeah exactly. Yeah, that's how they and that's kind of how the like Mission Impossible movies are like they just try and always have it both ways. But yeah, you're right, like Top gam Maverick was they specifically like didn't even say what the other country was. They're just like, and we have a target behind enemy alignes, you know, the way that people would talk about a thing. They wouldn't they wouldn't. We don't want to get specific here. No, isn't he not allowed to.
Read the news though? I mean is that I mean, still is he still with is he still with signology? Like I remember the I just explode into a bunch of Dayden's or whatever, the.
Focused energy being that just comes from Tom Cruise, just from his sheer magnetism.
Like my understanding what he doesn't really have access to the same information we do. I mean, he obviously has, you know, a very bubble life, and I think he's okay, I hope, but uh, I hope blink. But but yeah, I understanding is he not like plugged in?
Yeah? I think that's probably like it's that's why I think it's That's why I think it's interesting to think about Hit the political content of his movies because so like he made Top Gun a top Gun, by the way, named after a real military Air Force program that was literally created during Vietnam in order to improve the Navy's
kill ratio, like in in the Vietnam War. But then like a couple of years after that, he starred in Born on the fourth of July, directed by Oliver Stone, like a complete anti war movie that Oliver Stone specifically like cast him because he thought it would be funny to like put the guy from Top Gun, which he called a fascist film, in a anti war movie, but
mission impossible. Specifically are I don't know, they have this like weird thing where I think the show that they're based on was specifically sort of inspired by this guy, Robert Mayhew, who was basically the CIA's fixer, Like we hear the fixer, which is like the guy who does the dirt for an organization famous for like doing the world's doing capitalism's dirt. Like you have to be like there's just all sorts of you know, hiring the mafia to kill Fidel Castro quote, lining up sex workers for
foreign dignitaries. There's a new book that claims he was involved in the assassination of Bobby Kennedy and the First Mission A Possible movie was made with the help of the CIA's Public Affairs office. Specifically, they were like, well, holy shit, we'd like to be involved in helping you
shape the public perception of the agency. And then when you like kind of look at the content of the movies, it's always this weird thing where they are both an Intelli Gents agency, but they're also like fighting the American Intelligence Agency. Like that. It's always somehow like a double cross so that they can never be seen as like just being the CIA. You know. It's always like, well, we've got to do got to sneak sneak in here, and like do the skunk works.
There's always that kind of map, like the sort of like oh, they said stand down, it's like no, I'm gonna do it anyway.
Yeah, I'll do it anyway. Let's get Langley on the phone, and he's like too, He's really like when you think about it, he's like kind of punk rock.
He's so punk rock that that was the word I was trying to think of. He's punk rock.
That's gonna be funny if just one of the things was just about him shooting John F. Kennedy top guns laughing.
Imagine that movie, Like imagine you don't know who the target is behind the enemy lines, but those lines are in Dallas.
Yeah, just texting, you know.
Yeah, that's the big reveal.
That actually would be pretty good, like sick just like an Ocean's eleven style caper where they're like just trying to plan the jack assassination.
Do you think we should shoot one more? Do you think we should shoot one more?
Let's go a second ship's good shooters on grassing. Just make sure they're ingrassing noll covered clothing. But yeah, the franchise, first post nine eleven movie, he is arrested by the IMF and like forced to endure enhanced interrogation, so like just like have it both ways, you know, like there and also like at the end of that, the IMF, that's like the name of his agency, I think, want to like plant a super weapon in a Middle Eastern
country in order to justify an invasion. So basically just like the bad guy is the George W. Bush administration.
But yeah, it's so were those also working with the government, or they sort of took off.
I don't know, like yeah, at that point they probably didn't need like funding or consultation from the CIA. But it does seem like when you just think about the overall impression that you get from the movies, it's like, yeah, the CIA has like got some bad guys, but there's also good guys working the.
Like you get a price essentially because you want him to win, but you're also like, oh, you know, we all don't like authority, but at the end of the day, the authority, you know, still accepts him once they saw that.
He was right. Or like when a CIA agent's kid catches them like disposing of a body in their backyard, the thing that they like will tell their kid is it's complicated, you know that, Like, well, it's a complicated world where like this this person was a bad guy that you know before they have to like kill their kid, that's what they shovel. And I'm going to put you in the same hole.
I wonder because it's interesting this administration is much more hands on with like media and press, and I do see us going closer to like how China is where they late everything that comes out. I think it would be naive to assume we didn't do anything like that before.
I think you're right Jack that even with without funding, and I think with big movies like this, there's probably some level of like transparency, like the government or CIA you know, watches it because I imagine even if something gets close to something that's actually happening, they probably would be like, you have to kill that storyline. But I just scare me a bit how much we're going into this world where we're just everything's going to be monitored
and changed. Or maybe we're already are, but that's literally we talked about free speed, but that's literally like all these countries that regulate art and media, we're just doing that.
Yeah. Yeah, it's definitely we've like turned a corner where, you know, with the like CBS News thing that's happening right now, where that you know it's a they can't reach out and directly kill a story, but they can use the machinations of you know, Trump being able to do corruption without any any consequences whatsoever, and just being like I'm going to make it so you can't like
do the merger that you want to do. If you write a bad story about me and then like, yeah, it's essentially the same thing as having a government propaganda office or like somebody who's just reviewing everything to make sure that it's friendly. It's a good world. So yeah, this is in many ways just world. Just pointing this out is like nostalgic for a time when, like you, when they weren't just like yeah, no, we want to make a movie where the Cia is the hero, which
is probably where we're headed for. Well t t What a pleasure of having you as always on the podcast Lovely Where can people find you? Follow you all that good stuff? Yeah?
Actually I'm doing a Hollywood fringe that you live in LA. I have a discount code. I'm going to do four shows in June as my solo show I took to Edinburgh last year. It's called Good Girl Gone Battie Comedy. It's about me discovering my drag identity after my little brother died. There's some emotional parts, but a lot of fun, a lot of dancing, and there are boobs, so don't
bring your kids. The code is Zeit Gang all Capital and you can you can find me, oh yeah, find me online, so you can well don't find me in person, find me or find me in person at the show.
Whatever.
Find me in person at the show, find me online to get tickets at Teresa Lee bought on Instagram, and I'm not really using any other social medias, but if you find me, you can follow me on the other ones too.
There you go. That sounds good. Is there a work of media you've been enjoying?
Well, okay, you know a work of media because I just I just watched the Penguins documentary on Disney, which I highly recommend just generally getting into penguins. Every once in a while, I get into an animal and just search those videos on TikTok and it's just like a nice way to like look at animals and connect and learn. I don't know, that's like my Discovery channel. But there's the Dock on Disney Plus. I think it's been out for a while, but it's called I think it's literally
called Penguins and they follow these penguins around. But the part, if you watch the whole thing, watch till the end during the credits, because my favorite part is at the end where they show the crew filming it and you see just because it's beautiful and you know, you think they must have all this high tech equipment that zooms in and whatever, but then they show them behind the scenes and it's literally the crew is just like hanging out with penguins in this vast arctic and the penguins
just like walk up to them and walk past. And it's really cool to see how it was done because you really realize, like, oh, they were right there hanging out with.
The penguins to hang out.
So just watch the end, just watch the credits part that that part's fun.
You'll get it. You'll go yeah.
And then this thread okay, wait, this is the one that I found that I was gonna say, it's okay from at Mimi Blair. Everyone is born owing one hundred and fifty thousand bad art pieces to the god of bad art, and you can't make good art until you pay off all your debt. So yeah, people who made a lot of art as a kid are good at it now they paid off their debt.
I like that. That's pretty cool. I like that, Blake. Where can people find you their workI media you've been enjoying?
Uh yeah, also go see t t live Tt is one of my favorite people performers so go go see those shows, and then I, for the love of fucking God, follow me on social media if you don't and at Black Westler on everything. And then also I did a bike ride to raise money for autism research and awareness, and a lot of zeit Gang donated, so I just want to like, I saw all the donations and I shout it out Zychang, So there are at least like five or six seven people who from Zychang who donated,
so thank you. I saw that. I really appreciate it. And then stand up. I'm doing stand up and on August first, there's a Blake and Friends in Philly, so my favorite local comics are going to be on that. On August twenty second, I'm headlining the first ever comedy festival in Philadelphia, so I'm doing one of those shows. And then August twenty ninth to the thirtieth, I'll be in Wilkes Barry, and then there'll be other non Pennsylvania
based shows at some fucking point. And also I have a piece of media that I would like to read where I guess like the Airbnb person wrote, tomorrow we're unveiling Airbnb's next chapter. And then at Tanya Sabrina wrote water BnB, Fire B and B and Earth the B and B. So that's Tanya Sabrino, who's very funny comic. Tanya Underscore s a b r I n Aaa.
That's me there it is. I do wonder what they're I mean, it's going to be incredibly disappointing, but.
Just a totally fucked company. Also the ways they fucked everybody, everyone, everyone, their hosts, they're all right anyway, That's all I.
Have a feeling. If I had to guess it involves AI. Well yeah, then so the AI and air Airbnb is going to be capitalized, the house AI. You can find me on Twitter at Jack Undersquirrel, Brian on Blue Sky at Jack ob the number one work Amedia I've been enjoying at Tim Ross Comedy tweeted Give a man a
fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, buy the pond, tell him he can't have the fish, but he can fish for you, and you sell the fish and give him a very small cut, and then he'll say stuff like I am hungry at my teeth hurt. Nobody wants to fish these days. That's great as the old thing goes. You can find us on Twitter at Daily Zeitgeist. We're also on blue Sky at daily Zeikeeist and on Instagram. At the Daily Zeitgeist.
You can go to the description of the episode wherever you're listening to it, and you can find the footnotes, which is where we link off to the information that we talked about in today's episode. We also link off to a song that we think you might enjoy. Superducer Justin Connor, is there a song that you think the people might enjoy?
Yeah, it's about to be the weekend, so I thought i'd recommend a fun song. This one is called Coming Through by S Fidelity. It's got a really interesting feel to it. The best way I can describe it is it sounds like g funk mixed with like a chip tune style made by some guy in Berlin. So if that sounds interesting to you, then you can check out coming Through by s Fidelity in the footnotes.
But The Daily Zeitgeist is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from My Heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app Apple podcast. Wherever you listen to your favorite shows, that's gonna do it for us. This week, we're back on Tuesday to tell you what was trending over the long weekend. We'll have a Greatest Hits of the Week episode dropping over the long weekend, so you can check that out. But we will talk to you all on Tuesday. Bye, everybody, Bye bye bye bye.
The Daily Zeit Guys is executive produced by Catherine Long, co produced by Bay Wang.
Co produced by Victor Wright, co written by J M McNabb, edited and engineered by Justin Conner.