No Country For Old Trends 1/10: Josh Wine, Double Big Mac, Judge Judy, Saltburn, Trump

Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of No Country for Old Trends. I just courtesy of Jesse Jericho, who let us know on the discord. My wife Hanna asked me to submit this short show title on her behalf based on the episode about how America is indeed no country or old trends. I'm Jack that is miles. These are some of the things that are trending today. We're gonna get into the tunnels tomorrow. He showed up here looking for the tunnels. We got tunnel talk, don't

Of All Kinds of Tunnels, we break down the hottest tunnels on the internet right now. It's not like going in Brooklyn, y'all around the world.

Yeah, yeah, Like I didn't dig it, but like there's so many movies based around tunnels, Like we mean tunnels, tunnels in a movie. I just said that that movie Tunnels, Hooles, Goonies, Batman was the last one. Dark Knight Rises, Yeah, what was that one with Sylvester Stallone Daylight? Daylight? Wasn't that people get trapped in a tunnel? Yeah they were trapping. Yeah, that one's fucking scary. I don't.

I know, I don't like that one though. The idea of being fucking caught in a tunnel is actually might Nope, we.

Are tunnel people, though we were tunnel fans. We'll we'll get into it a little bit more. We'll dig into it a little more, folks. But he's done it. We're talking. Uh. The other thing that's taken taken Twitter, specifically by storm Josh wine. Are you familiar with fuck?

I know I always laugh when I like whenever. I'm not a wine drinker, but her majesty is like, oh, get like a like a whatever, like twelve dollars bottle or something. And I'm always like, I'm gonna get Josh because this ship called Josh because it's yeah, exactly the only reason. That's pretty straightforward, and that's why it's going viral. Like I tried to google it. I like when you google it on the like news.

Tab of Google, Like the latest stories are like a Forbes article from Thanksgiving, like recommending it as a good cheap wine. Like that, nobody's really covering it. It has no reason to be popular other than it's a wine that is named Josh. People seem torn on whether it's good or bad wine. But one thing is unmistakable. It is called josh Yeah, and that is funny. I don't know why.

I think it's because everything's always like you know, it's either have like some it's like in French, or like some like some new fangled family sellers type thing.

And this shit is just called josh. But it's hard to put your finger on like what it is because if it was Joshua, fine, but that that wouldn't stand out to me at all. Joshua. Why. I feel like there are certain names that belong just in a group of like these can't be like Greg. I feel like if there's Greg Wines, that probably wouldn't work very well, right, No.

No, Greg, I mean I guess ironically, if it was like cousin Greg from.

Succession, I think Greg fine Greg too much? Yeah? Yeah, Like what about Blake Blake. I could see Blake easy because Blake can be a rich person's last name, you know, all right? All right, like then Bill Bill? Yeah, but I feel like you have like an illustrated duck on the cover or something like that. Yeah, Brian the editor has come through with a suggestion, Darryl, which I think probably,

Hannah on it too, Yeah, Darryl, Yeah that could work anyways, give us your best bad name for a while and because yeah, that seems to be what the entire story is.

I love it, I respect it. I think the the origin story of it. Super producer Justin was saying that, like, there's an ad where the guy's like, my dad's name was Josh. I remember his hands, liked his hands, he worked with his hands. So we're calling this Josh Wines, which love a dad guy, you know.

Yeah, found as a tribute from son to father, Josh Sellers makes well balanced and delicious wines sourced from California's best growing regions.

We gotta love it anyways, Uh, speaking of like, I feel like Josh Wines might be the McDonald's of wines. Is that is that the level? I'm not a wine drinker, obviously, Like is.

I'm not a wind I couldn't tell you that, man, Yeah, I'm so far sorry, sorry, y'all.

I'm not that fucking classy. So like a mid here Dancy restaurant McDonald's is uh bringing back a fan favorite after four years. The Double Big Mac is coming back. Wait, what's the Double Big Mac? You just double up the meats, so there's four in it. Yes, my pitch was double up the meats, but double up the cheese too. You don't want to fuck up that ratio?

Yeah, yeah, but it's the real dependency ratio we should be talking about.

Thank you slices. Does seem like that'll fuck up the ratio? And this is maybe just for people who really like a meaty, a meati burger. But this article in CNN says has this quote, which I think found interesting, grabbed my attention, unlike the previous version, so I guess the previous version came out pre COVID. Nobody's claiming that it

It.

It's just a I'm like, I'm just thinking of what what their research was showing.

They're like, man, people fucking hate that.

The patties look like shit, right, the cheese barely fucking melts.

Right, they gotta fucking do something.

But I get this seer part because yeah, like sometimes they just be there, looks so fucking grey, you know what. I was like, But I'll eat it because I'm a.

Trash dwelling organism. I do have to assume that the seer on the burger has something to do with just like smoke flavor being added to the petties and not and not that they're like we've decided to flame broil all of these.

Yeah, you know, it's because it's probably now coming up against the smash burger fat that's smash, you know what I mean. And that's all about getting like a good sear You get the my art effect on there, you know that really concentrates the flavors.

Yeah, I said it, I said my artifact. I don't know what that meant with me. What is it.

That's that's that's the flavor like that you get from like searing meat. Ah, I guess technically, but yeah, like it's that that it just brings up. It's a chemical reaction that just brings out just a little bit more flavor.

Got it, all? Right, Well we'll see how this softer buns. Sure, I will take that. Sometimes the buns are a little bit crumbly, a little bit. Uh, I feel like the bread has been left out too long. Meltier cheese, I am probably here for it, but it does seem like something is happening chemically there. Like the cheese already was American cheese, which has always seemed suspiciously melty to me. It's like, well, nothing should be this melteth This is

See how really, Yeah, they're trying to learn lessons from, you know, the the real burger shacks that people like that serve real burgers and not Yeah, you know, like McDonald's. What I'm say, mcdonald'sn'try and do anything. Yeall are your own thing. It's a fucking weird McDonald's burger.

And people at the same time when Dominoes did it, we were all like, man, I can't believe they're admitting that, Oh, actually this is better, this is actually really improved this And they also still like offered the old version. They're like for.

Those who who like one, yeah, you can still a shit Mac when you're at the drive through.

Just a reminder for everyone that Judge Judy is the worst because Judge Judy came through is making news thanks to her endorsement of Nicki Haley, who she claims can restore America and is the future of this great nation. And I think a lot of people are like, wait, but Judge Judy, we love her for some reason.

We love your politics. Remember your twenty twenty pick for president.

Mike Bloomberg, Baby, she was a big Bloomberg's stumper. She also claimed that she would fight Bernie Sanders' supporters to the death, So good for her. The most perfect country in the world and those people that are trying to change it or revolutionize it don't have a chance, because I'll fight them to the death, was her response to the popularity of Bernie Sanders. Yeah, yeah, I like it.

She's like, because I'll cape for this status quo till I fucking die.

You're like, okay, y'all, please please Nikki restore us. But she's basically like been a monster. Yeah yeah, Like before she came became a TV star, she was a wildly controversial judge who is documented in a nineteen ninety three La Times profile which made her a celebrity. And like that profile was just like she's so mean to poor people. Yeah, I love the wildest shit to poor people.

It's just wild too, like how we were talking about shit in the nineties too, Like in that Arco said.

A young crack mother.

Yes, was like describing one of the people that was having a case being heard by judge, Like, yo, Ellie Times, what are we Okay.

It's eighty eight in here, but we're moving on. And yeah, I mean she's just saying wild shit.

But like, can we stop her from populating half the planet?

You're like, oh, oh, eugenics jokes, Okay, Okay, not a joke. She's like, I'm about it. Yeah, And I'll fight you to the death over it. Yeah, I'm actually like pretty liberal, you know, I'm like a center liberal person. I think Clinton nomics is great.

Yeah, and we should sterilize people who I don't look like.

Yeah, calling expanded welfare programs that could actually help poor families a scam just received. She was like known for being like legal experts were like, she's needlessly cruel and like sarcastic while being needlessly cruel. Right, So I think that's what.

Yeah, that was just like the fun of that show though too, Like I just remember as a kid watching it. It just falls into that genre of call it like screaming at people reality show, like whether that's Gordon Ramsey or her or like Tabitha's Salon Takeover. There was just a show where someone come in and be like just beerreat people, and you're like, bar.

Rescue, I'm rescuing you. I'm rescuing you from dignity.

By a Maron're like okay, John Taffer, please damn sir.

Yeah, but I mean also extremely wealthy. She amassed a fortune worth an estimated four hundred and eighty million dollars. Her show ended in twenty twenty one, but now She has a streaming show on Amazon's Free v called Judy Justice. Oh and it also is based on a literal one hundred millionaire. Her routine was humiliating and attacking poor people.

Yeah, I mean they also like think about the practice of the show. Like there was like a thing where it was like revealed that the producers were talking about, like we need less black people on the show, and.

She was like, I don't care, yeah do you.

I mean, I'm not to say anything but wink wink wink, okay, And with that, I'm just Judy.

But we loved her so much. We loved her yelling at me.

The shot in Freuda that that's show inspired was was truly something else. But now she completely uh fucking dicked over her like former bailiff that.

She's like, sorry, we can pay you, so yeah that he had to call her.

He found out again through the news that it was some other person and he calls like, wait, is this for real?

And she's like, look, ain't no way we could pay you. What's your you know, what's your what's your accustomed to? So I chose not to even call you. But yeah, I think it's there's something that people like you know, America wants to believe it is a meritocracy, and so

I think I've seen the trend without knowing what the fuck is going on with Saltburn, like on TikTok.

Yeah. So it's the latest movie from the director who made Promising Young Woman Emerald Fennel, and it's like a tale of class takes place in the UK. I have not seen it. I've heard decidedly mixed things about it, Okay, but seems similar to Leave the World Behind in that it was in theaters kind of came and went, and then once it hits streaming, it has become a massive meme generation machine. From the one thing I know about it other than that it is by the director who made Promising Young Woman.

I guess this could be just a spoiler alert in case you're gonna see Saltburn.

Spoiler alert for the movie and also for your lunch. Don't spoil this's his growth. So one of the characters, Barry Keegan. Is that how you pronounced that guy? I'm terrible with Irish names, all right, Barry Cogan there, well, great actor from banshees of in Sheering. He's also in the new season of Top Boy. Oh hell yeah, yeah. He drinks a cummy bath water in uh oh he has a grimace milkshake. He has a grim.

We call that a grimace milkshake around your folks, cummy bathwater, Okay.

And so people are I don't think people are drinking cummy bathwater. But they're doing the uh like reaction videos showing their faces as they watched the scene for the first time. UH making videos where they recorded older family members reacting to the scene, which in term resulted in a sort of counter response with a wave of videos of people being like that seems not even shocking. Okay, I drink cumbwater all the time, just bath jack off juice.

Is that a sense you want to fill your home with? Like if you're faithfully recreating that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean again, whatever you want. But I'm just curious are with someone in a lab and being like, Okay, we need this shit to smell like rotten cookie dough mixed with a ginkgo tree.

Right, And then there's a I guess it takes place in the early two thousands, and there's a bunch of two thousand songs that have received a surgeon popularity, such as Murder on the Dance Floor, which actually charted thanks for the movie.

I love when shit like this brings old songs back, Like I didn't realize Brenda Leees rocking around the Christmas Tree, like hadn't hadn't charted when it came out, but then like get number one for the first time, and it's because of the Spotify playlist, I'm sure, but it's always interesting, like that's always got to be the thing. Like like when you have like a music career that's kind of ended and you're like hoping, like your catalog just gets swept.

Up and something. Give me that one baby, take me back so I can make forty five dollars. I need to get a bush effect, get a double big mac. But uh yeah, and then people are also like, I guess recreating the end of the movie in which a character dances around a giant mansion. So people I saw, oh really around there? I was like, stupid palatial houses.

Dude, there were some of these fucking houses. I'm like, I don't know shit about what money is because I was like, this is a museum, I think, and not someone's home, Like how do you have forty foot ceilings?

Right?

But I guess it's Look, when you have to unburden yourself from all that money, you just have to get the you gotta have a forty foot seat.

It is so hard, Like if I had to unburden myself of billions of dollars, yeah, I might buy Nazi propaganda too, exactly. I might buy Sokka Juweya's skull. Okay, that's just because I'm trying to unburden myself from all this money. Nothing better than drinking your skull and bones fratmates cumming bath water out of Soka Juias.

Say, speak for yourself. I'm snipping straight josh out of this skull piece.

And then finally, Judge Arthur Angrin has said that he does not expect Donald Trump to speak during closing arguments in the three hundred and seventy million dollars New York civil fraud trial against Trump. Yeah.

Well, yeah, because there was the deadline came and went and it's been crick gets. But I mean this, this is the three hundred and seventy million dollars in damages case here, and also being like and you will never do business in the state again.

Yeah, I'll well, big one, see the big one for him, and that one.

He's gonna I mean, that's just that shit'll hurt because we know this guy probably only has like two hundred dollars, you know, and he's just living off of He's living on a prairie, y'all. And those NFTs of him, uh being a macho man. So yeah, it'll be interesting.

To go out by the Trump NFTs is what we're saying because yeah, help work this guy man, yeah help this guy will all right, Those are some of the things that are trending on this Wednesday, January tenth. We are back tomorrow with a whole last episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourself, get the vaccine, don't do nothing about what It's the premie and we will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye bye,