Hello the Internet, and welcome to season three, seventeen, episode five of Dilly's I Gust Day production of iHeartRadio. This is a podcast where we take a deep dive and it's Friday, December fifteenth, twenty twenty three. My name is Jack O'Brien AKA Giants balls, giants balls. These are foreshort giants. No, that's wrong. This is supposed to be to silver bells, jump bells, Giants balls, Giants balls.
These are foreshorre giants balls. And his dick and his dick, don't forgetbout his dog.
That is courtesy f E Secure Full twelve thirty nine on the discord. Shout out to you, Shout out to the British physician who thought a dinosaurs femur was a giants testicles. We have to keep thrilling to be joined at. I'll keep talking about as long as you keep writing the aka I'm throwing to be joined as always buy my co host, mister Miles grab Oh. Before I begin my AKA, I would would be remissive me to not actually tell you what December fifteenth is. Okay, so should
just run that beds look. Jack's got the look.
You got the holiday jacket on your festival holiday holiday.
Learned a new fabric wild Wolf.
I'm wearing a boiled cotton T shirt which is just something I washed on hot in my washing machine. But it's also International Tea Day, but the herbal kind, not the national ware. Your Pearls Day, National Ugly Christmas Sweater Day, National Cupcake Day, National Underdog Day, Cat Herder's Day. Hey don't got rights, no, but it is Bill of Rights Day, so there is all that.
And anyway, who am I? I am Miles Gray aka Give Me Give, Give Me Great with Gravy Baby shout out to First Blood five to two two on that one crazy town, but gravy town with it. Gravytown Baby with it. Also one of.
My favorite basslines ever did It's so that Ship's.
Time one hard. That's one of those songs that first two seconds. I know what it is. Oh yeah, oh yeah, time to take a little on trip train. Where are we going? Craziness crazy how Miles? We're thrilled to be joined in our third seat by a hilarious and talented comedian and performer. He's a staple of the Brooklyn underground comedy scene. His songs and videos like Orbo and your dad never go in the direction that I expect and always make me laugh my ass off. Please welcome to the show.
Yeah look, why, thank you guys for having me. It's boys time.
It's boys time. I gave Valley boys time.
Because you're also eight one eight, then it's nice to have you, know, fellow San Fernando Valley folks on here, even though you are coming to us from Brooklyn.
But hey, yes, but I still have that.
Eight one eight area code. I will never give it away. And that is because my dad is hand for I would hear.
That Ellie Valley pride. And because on the family plan, on the family plan, you feel me never letting go. That's kind of what I did.
My partner, her majesty, she was her mom was paying her phone bill until we got engaged, and then I.
Was like, I will take over for the phone. Oh now she would be on my family plan. And it felt very weird to go along with it when yeah, yeah, her hand, you're yeah, and I will and they're equivalent of a dowry and you have a compatible phone plan for her to be on as well. That's one thing before I let you take my daughter's hand that's their first question. Do you have a comfortable phone plan with
good coverage? I'm sorry you're on Sprint. Wait they still have a couple Yeah, all right, Ian, we're gonna get to know you a little bit better in a moment. First, we're going to tell our listeners a couple of the things we may be talking about today. We don't always get to all of them, but we're gonna talk about the Biden impeachment inquiry is here, and it's not like your grandpa's impeachment inquiry. This one got no proof. Yeah,
it's based on nothing. So we'll talk about that. We'll talk about we got a little clue into what it sounds like when a lobbyist just write all your word for you. And then we'll talk about marinated diet coke. This is a little simpler than it sounds. It's simpler than it.
Sounds, but it's I'm I'm really at that age where i don't know if I'm being a curmudgeon and I'm like this is bullshit, like what's wrong with the kids, or if it's like two people doing it, But after doing some research, it's a thing. It's a thing, and we must discuss it and what is happening.
I love a crisp DC personally, I am ian are you at your eyes back? You were.
Transcending and honestly normal Coke. Get it out of here.
I don't need it. No, it's too I don't. Then y'all are gonna fucking love this development because this is this ship is like purpose design for the vibe die Coke drinker, and I feel like I have too right here. I was so anti die Coke when I was younger. I was like this chastes like chasse, like metal chaste, like I'm drinking a machine and then drinking, and then I it's now probably my favorite drink, and I think like a true marvel of modern technology. Yeah, one of
the things that America should be most proud of. It's It's just had rough branding for me because I was associated with my stressed out elementary school teachers.
Yeah.
Yeah, like that was always on their desk.
Was Yeah, they smelled like fucking capris and they had fucking like a bunch of diet coke cans on their desk. And for me, I was like, I don't know if I want that life, but yeah, uh go ahead. Turns out you do because the crispiness. I got a marinate. I got a marinate.
This just makes me realize in real time, I think drinking a lot of diet coke as a kid might have made me gay.
So you just want in front of Congress.
Yeah, my mom had a time, and I just remember I was a normal kid. Then I started drinking all of her diet coke and I'd be like, throw, how was club.
Jacked?
Yeah?
I almost had to spin. Yeah, my life could have taken a different turn if I hadn't had that. Anti was your Oh wait, well you didn't get it early enough. I didn't get No. My older sister was drinking it, and I was like, sometimes their drinks would get mixed up and I would be like, I would do a literal spit take. I was very dramatic about it. I was like, this is terrible. What are you trying to
kill me? And I also like to because there were people in my family be like, I don't know, can you taste this and tell me if it's diet coke a regular coke? And I took great pride in being a super taster of that. Particularly. I could always tell
the difference. You can feel that asparta me running through Yeah. Yeah, and to this day I'm very like I there are restaurants where I'm like, oh, they have bad diet coke, you know, and then like restaurants where the diet coke is good, and it's usually like the fancy or the restaurant the worst the diet coke unless they give it to you in the little bottle like a lot of times, if they're giving it to you from the bar, it's
gonna be kind of watered down and in a tiny glass. Okay, if you go you go to Olive Garden, if you look at fly show behind me, look at where the red strings go, and you'll see that it forms a very clear pattern here. Yeah, So we'll talk about that, We'll talk about some movies coming out in twenty twenty four, all of that, plenty more. But first, Ian, we do like to ask our guests, what is something from your search history?
Okay, I'm looking right now. The most recent thing I searched is Sonic the hedgehog hen tie. Yes, No, no, wait, never mind not that. No, Actually, the most interesting thing I found in my search history in the last day or two. This is how I phrased it safe way to do live hyrotechnics amateur.
Wait, so in your mind, what's the pyro display that you're thinking. We're talking about explosions flamethrowers.
What vertical flamethrower? So I do like I do comedy music, and I do a lot of my own music production, but I have people help me on that, amazing talented producers. I also do a lot of production of like my live shows, and I just like adding I have confetti cannon sometimes I want to get fans in there. I flew exposed me for growing up in the two thousands, but I flew to Chicago to see Fallout Boy performing their hometown at Rickleyfield. Hell yeow Wentz had a flame
on his Yeah, exactly. I got to get the right in my veins. And I was in love with Patrick Stunt growing up, and he was when he was telling stories, I was like, I want this man. I want to pay this man to hit me. But anyway, but anyway, he went had a flame door on his bass and I was like, that's so stupid.
And I need it right now. Wait, like coming out of the like tip the guitar basically it.
Was attached to the very head of the guitar, just shooting flames whenever. Was it for like a power chord kind of like it It was already guitar and he's a very phallic guy. But it was just a pretty random The flames just randomly came out whenever.
It was so funny and it was just random. It wasn't like he hits the peak of the solo and then.
Like, honestly, no, because what solo are you really doing? At a base It would just sort of at different intervals be like okay, fire and then he'd look at it and go yeah. He'd stick his tongue out.
Like he was he actually didn't know that was gonna happen.
It was it was their first show, so I doubt he like really knew when it was gonna happen, right.
Shout out, shout out the giant Jamaican bi racial, the homie paint.
Pete Wentz too, you know what I mean.
He's holding it down.
Yeah, that's why it's hard for him to I don't know what his hair looked like, if it was wavy or something, but when he was doing it all flat, I was like, oh you let let let the real texture come through, Pepe, I have bad news.
It did look absolutely insane. It was like down to it was like straightened down to his hips and the lower half of it was yellow and the other was no. Figure it out. He's doing good.
Yeah, what is something you think is overrated?
Okay, hear me out on this one.
Eating, eating is overrated.
I'm tired of it. I have to do it all the time. I have to do it like three times a day. I'm starting to get bored. I get I'm starting to lose weight because I'm like, I don't care about eating. Give me the pill, you know, where's the future pill? That's like, you don't have to eat anymore? This is the pill. It is. I don't and I don't like anyone telling me what to do, even God, So don't let me. Don't make me eat twice three times a day. I'm not into it, right?
Is it just what you just wanted to get? You want it done efficiently. You're like you don't have time, You're just trying to You got your mind in other places. You're not someone who thinks about food all the time. Like meat that could because of weed.
But I don't know, Well, sometime I mean when I spoke weed, Yeah, of course I want to eat something delicious or.
Like for dinner.
I'm like, yeah, I hit it. For like a lunch, I'm like, I don't want to stop what I'm doing to eat to have a sandwich.
So there's like stuff that happens with like energy when I eat a lunch. Oh yeah, I'm not allowed to take it like Spain has it right, there needs to be a nap after that mother. Oh yeah, yeah, you know yeah, or yeah.
I totally don't take a nap after every single lunch I ever eat.
Yeah, definitely, that's a wild idea. Did you ever you take me? Did you ever try soilent when everybody was getting super into soilent? Yes?
Absolutely?
Oh so you really are about that? Like I don't have fucking time right now. Yes, but I got tired of veins, yeah, right in the veins. Yeah, I want the pill, Give me the pill, that's right.
I mean they've been promising it for a while and here we are coming to the end of twenty twenty three and still nothing. Still nothing. I mean, I'm sure there are like soiling I guess was an attempt at that, but it's still you know, you gotta gulp that shit down. Yea, he's still going to it the whole fucking thing. Yeah. Yeah. Does it fit? Does it keep you full? Like do you feel full after you have some soilent? I are
the most ready for my next my next meal. I mean they pack a lot of shit into that little bottle.
I remember like went at the height of it when I was like making videos and ship for magazines, Like we bought like cases just to do like content with it, and we were drinking as I'm leftovers, and I was like, damn, like I don't like the taste, but I'm pretty sure it's delivering on its promise that you don't want to eat after this.
Any power hours Yeah yeah, doing a bunch of shots.
It's just slim fast for boys, right.
Yeah, which is like I'm like, is this disordered eating? Like is this this can't be good right for But it's fine slim fast for tech bros. Yeah.
I was working in tech when I got really into drinking soilent, so I was absolutely walking stars.
So yeah, this is exactly.
I mean.
Then that was like the perception too, was because everyone was like, dude, I would appear in the valley the Silicon One, not San Fernando.
You don't want to fucking time.
We're fucking too busy doing acid and drinking soilent coming up with the next app that'll just destroy a bunch of industries.
That's right, it'll just make your life unlivable. What is something you think is underrated?
Okay, you guys gotta bear with me on this one. Underrated? Taylor Swift? Hear me out here?
Go on? Now, what is it about Taylor Swift I've been wondering.
Okay, Yes, she is so overexposed. We're hearing news about her every single day. She's a billion dollar business. She has like a million products. She's always selling something. But the way I still see like half of people be like, oh I don't like her. Oh no, She's like I don't like her music, Get her off my TV screen. The thing that I love is we now have like another, like a Princess Diana, a Michael Jackson. We have a single person to focus our whole culture on, which is
so unifying and fun. And I think I don't want people to like her. I don't care if they like her. I want them to accept that it is her world. She yes, when the aliens come down? Why would I send Joe Biden? Yeah, and Taylor Swift.
You know what, if the alien are smart, they might just pull up straight to Taylor Swift like place in Manhattan.
Oh she's the aliens. I remember early on we were like, is she like she just like has she looks alien adjace? Can you run a full marathon while singing songs?
I know?
Okay? Or is that some kind of alien technology? I feel like she would be If I had to guess who has access to the alien technology Allah Independence Day, it would probably be her, right, Like, that's who first of all they would want to give it to, because they're like, You're like, I think, what do they call the really tall slender like pale aliens? Gray?
The grays?
The grays are the short little ones, the Nordic aliens. I feel like they might be like yeah, or they might be like you're one of You're not one OF's like oh, you're just really really she's the freaker the fuck out person. No, not, you're one of us. Let's go. Let's go. We've talked about this before quite a bit on the show as a show that like tries to take a look at the national share consciousness and the zeitgeist. Taylor Swift may have come up a time or two.
And the question that I feel like we come up against is is she, like so time person of the Year has never been a entertainer. Really, it's been a Bono made it for his humanitarian work with and I am making the jerk off him gesture yea as I say that, But she's the first one who's just like she was in this year. Yes, exactly so is this want?
One of the theories that we like to talk about is that as humans in the in this modern world have lost access to religion like our Beyonces and Taylor's Swift have come in to like replace those foundational spiritual myths. Do we think that she is like it's on par with Michael Jackson and Princess Diana or is she even like above that at this point?
Mmm, she's not quite there. I still contend she's not
quite there. She had not quite MJ level. No, no, no, no, no, like anyone you're gonna have, you're gonna you're gonna need to pull up to like sub Saharan Africa, show the picture and they all got to be like cry, like if they're not doing that, then it's not quite you're not hidding globally, but because like everywhere else, you know, like Europe, fucking North America and South America even it's definitely I mean, she could be on her way for sure.
I think at this moment it's it's not quite there. But I think more interestingly, we were talking about an episode I hate to show our hand for a future episdence coming up. You know, we were actually asking is she the anti Christ?
Mm hmmm mmmm and like and not in like a ah get.
Away, but the you know, the influence that she has and the fear that she strikes in the hearts of conservatives and.
Religious figure or something like that, there might be something there. Yeah.
Yeah, And people love people are always looking for labels for themselves so that they can feel like they have a spot. That's what religion does. That's what being as swifty is. Yeah, she could she could use those set I mean not that I'm not a swifty She could kill all of us if she wanted. She could just be like swifties attack.
Honestly, I have a feeling she could manage to do like irl damage and physical space more than like Trump could with maybe mag of people if she really wanted to start turning the dial up, you know.
So it's you know, with just World War Z level waves of humans just running, like I feel like, could scale like a wall, you know.
But they're all like seventeen year old girls, which I.
Mean, don't never underestimate a seventeen year old girl. No, Yeah, I like this argument. I think I think it is counterintuitive. But I do think that people people are sleeping on Taylor Swift.
I just want people to stop resisting.
Stop resisting. You go, thank you. Yeah, just fucking become one with the borg that is Taylor.
Yeah, you'll be happier.
Do we just see this continuing? Like on some level, I've heard people are like, she can't get much bigger, and America loves to see someone torn down. Right On the other I think saying it can't get she can't get any bigger is a little like saying like, well, it's not like it can get any worse. Politically, It's like,
well you just lack the imagination. Yeah, hold all these beers please, yes, watch So like I do think she could get any bigger, but I think as she gets bigger from here, we do start to enter on precedented territory.
Yeah, it's a weird spot where we don't This is the first time we don't have a break from someone ever because she's been re recording those albums and just putting them out in the middle. So she's been in the news every day for over a year now, and usually with you know, Olivia Rodrigo just put out her new album and that was huge too, but we didn't hear from her for a couple of months before that.
We got a butter either. So I have no idea what it's gonna look like, you know, I Is it gonna explode and everyone's gonna hate her all of a sudden.
Do you think like that sort of like American misogynistic pattern is gonna come for her or like, because like you say, Jack, every anytime anyone gets big, it's there is a teardown phase, like with entertainers no matter what. And I'm curious because I know, like even in reading interviews, how she said she was much more affected by things that people said when she was younger, but she's older and now like it doesn't nearly affect her. So maybe
she's like I've reached my final form. You can fucking try, motherfuckers, but I like them out of anti stones and cruxes.
Yeah, I feel like I think Oprah like left the planet a long time ago, but it's still very consistent Lee Oprah, you know, like there's nothing that changed it. I feel like I could see Taylor Swift just evolving in that direction of like no longer on this planet, because I think the thing that often happens. First of all, people want to see a giant, giant celebrity taken down just because for the same reason they watch like buildings
being detonated. But I I think that also just it is such a strange like level of fame and like psychological experiment that it's hard to maintain one's like coherent gravitational equilibrium of reality at that level. And then so it you know, if the whole world is rooting for you to fail spectacularly kind of even if they don't
admit that. And also so you are in a bizarre psychological experiment where like nobody has told you the truth in twenty years, you know, like everybody around you is just like WHOA, yeah, you're killing killing, Then it's almost an impossibility that you maintain anything resembling normalcy, but the kind of how you get weird can go in a direction that just keeps making you more and more famous, right, Like, and.
She's so weird by the way, Taylor, I saw the concert. The way she like pauses for applause after every three words is so funny and a lot I love how crazy she is.
And but like, also, yeah, that's a good example of she is. Every single gesture and micro gesture and micro expression is perfect. Like that's how she's gotten weird. That's how she's becoming human. Like that's dialing it in tighter and tighter into exactly what people want from her, right yeah, So.
I feel like that's got to be the point at which fame actually is purely worse than it is good, when nobody's being honest with you anymore.
Oh yeah, oh yeah, that's gotta be it. The thing that like you really don't want to see is when they like build their own universe that has its own name, like Graceland and Neverland and right right right, I think like Eddie Murphy had that for a little while and it's and then he came out Jamaican, that reggae album, and they were like what the fucked? Yeah, yeah, Prince had it, and Prince maintained his prince ness up till up until the end.
But he got weird too. You know, you gotta get weird. I think that's the thing. It's like, we got to get yeah, but he was weird. He was known for being weird. That was kind of his whole thing. And he's just like kind of honed it and honed it
more and more. She is famous for being like very broad and miss Americana, but she is seems able to hone that more and more and more somehow, right, Yeah, Yeah, we seem to find out that she has like a like a secret dunkin Donuts in her garage or some weird shit like that, you know, like bring on.
To the like dunkin Donuts more. I feel like, I know, right, crazy, that's I'm saying. I don't. That's why I need to see the weird Tailor phase, Like, yeah, weird Tailor to take everybody with you please to the weird land. I just want to see what her media diet, like, what her just like intake is like, Like is she reading Barbara Streisand's memoir or is she reading books about Napoleon right now, you know, like, what is what? What does she think is next for her? Right? She's like, I'm
reading a lot of bell hooks. Actually, yeah, that would be dope. Damn. Yeah. All right, let's take a quick break and we'll be right back. And we're back. We're back, We're back, and the presidents in hot water, back in hot water. We got another impeachment coming, and this one is unique because there's no reason for it. Yeah, I mean, as much as as much as I like to criticize Joe Biden, my god, the Republicans, they're really they're fucking trying anything, and by anything meaning.
Nothing, because they have been shrieking about impeaching Brandon ever since they got a majority in the House, and since then they've pretty much done.
Fuck all to prove a single thing. Like one of the last things or one of the last times we even discussed the potential of an impeachment, we heard like GOP congressman saying like, we'll see, like.
We need to open the impeachment inquiry to find the evidence. And they're like, but you have no evidence to even to suggest that you need to open an inquiry, And they're like, well, I'm not because we haven't opened it yet, because I kind of a catch twenty three. They're like, you mean catch twenty two. They're like, no, catch twenty three. But anyway, so they're trying to find evidence of wrongdoing.
They're trying to find the evidence, and so the plan was always to go on a snipe hunt just to give a boy Scouts reference there and hope that they can conjure up something that resembles an impeachable offense. And so anyway, on Wednesday, all the Republicans voted to open an impeachment inquiry and they still have no evidence.
They only have the art of projection. And to kick off the PR tour for this horseshit, the three horsemen of horseshit, Jim Comer, Jim Jordan, and Jason Smith went on Sean Hannity's show and couldn't even give an answer that resembled a legal argument. And this is with Sean Hannity trying to like set this up to be like and you got the goods, tell us all about it. Here's them on handedy.
Exit question for all of you. Congressman Smith, I will start with you, is this now an investigation about Joe Biden being involved in what would be a bribery scandal, a money laundering scandal, and an influence pedaling scandal, which one.
This has always, Sean been an investigation in regards to Joe Biden, the IRS whistleblo when they came forward, they highlighted how the j.
Those three issues, that's what I'm asking.
Influence in a multitude of numerous items. And we're just continuing to follow the facts.
Oh my god, bro just getting caught like they're constantly getting like, just gotcha by the biggest softballs. It's just fucking toss underhand, tossing meatballs up and they're just like.
Ah, well, can't can't quite say that one because it's a regard to Joe Byron, I just gave you three options that would have sounded like a legal argument.
He's just said, it's like all this stolen IRIS whistleblowers, brom.
So all we got was this like horseshit word salad after that. So yes, Joe Biden correct Sean.
Also, I know this isn't a visual medium, but they were showing the most handsome old pictures of Joe Biden next to the video. The entire time, it was like, oh, we hate this guy and they're showing the best. I hope they do that to me when they do a takedown piece, right shots, only.
Use your good headshots, like when your approval almost it felt like, but yeah.
The ones where he's eating an ice cream cone while riding a Harley, yeah.
Exactly for the listeners they were they were showing pictures of him at like forty.
Yeah you got holding two ar fifteens and rapping an American flag and they're like this Joe Byron guy, So which one is it?
Is it one? I just love that heat. Hannity even tried to be like, no, right, right, right, right, it's in regards to him, but which one of these three things that actually sounds like an impeaceable offense is it?
And don't just say trying to help you? Yeah, hey, all right, forget it, dipshit, thanks thanks so much for stopping by. I guess that's the inquiry. Here we go, wow, because yeah, on Fox and Friends, like Doucey hates the impeachment inquiry. And it's funny because Jim Comer has been crying about it, like he's been going on New Max, Our news Max and he's like, I just don't understand, Like why Deucey on Fox he always tries to just throw cold water on what I'm trying to say.
Wow, you don't mean to me.
I just don't understand it. Man and CNN, it's like he's just all bad. That's why I like come to News Max. I'm done with Fox. It's like because they're because they even they know they're like bro like it. It helps if there's some kind of actual evidence.
You can't just do this thing. But here we are again, just to note they only have fantasies in their heads, okay, of little shaper plumps dancing through their heads.
They're so creative.
I know they couldn't even say that. All they can come was with in regards to Joe Biden, it is correct that you say as such. In regards to uh Joe.
A meaning of dark brand? How dark has he gone? And that's the real question we were going to ask. We also just like to check in with, well, what the lobbyists are up to. Sometimes you can just hear them writing for politicians, like hear the writing just come forth transparently, like it, where's the teleprompter?
On?
Yeah, and a lobbyist like handing them like a bunch of papers, like start with page one, go to the bookplates. Okay, so I support this bill because fossil fuels will heal the earth.
Fuck this is bad copy, guys.
So this thing has happened recently in the House because with all the real issues that are happening on planet Earth and even on our own country, they decided to go all in on an old michell O thing that she did to the dairy industry back in twenty twelve that the industry just cannot get over, and that was banning two percent in whole milk from school lunches over health concerns, and she was all like, let's try and get like healthier school lunches for the kids.
How about that? And right now the USDA is considering even banning flavored.
Milks because they're like, yeah, these are kind of like loaded with added sugars.
That milk already is incredibly full of sugar. Is something I realized, like having kids, I'm like, wait, why the fuck is there like seventeen grams of sugar this glass of milk? What the fuck?
Yeah, So what is an imperiled industry to do? Get your lobbyists to write really fucking bad talking points that will not resonate with a single rational human being, and you give that to one of your bot representatives in Congress. This week's lucky winner of read from the Lobbyist written teleprompter is Virginia Fox of North Carolina.
She took the mic as a bill to bring back the milks was being debated and offered these honestly just bonafide, scientifically ironclad arguments why the mules need to change over bringing the milks back. And I will let her say it in the Lobbyist I'm sorry in her own words.
The nutrients and whole milk, like protein, calcium and vitamin D provide the fuel Santa needs to travel the whole globe in one night. Whole milk is the unsung hero of his Christmas journey. Protein helps build and repairs Santa's muscles. Heavy sacks of gifts up and down the.
Chimney is no, there's a young person behind her.
That is calcium for strong bones. It is calcium that stands as strong and sturdy as he dashes from rooftop to rooftop. And vitamin D is a say to a strong immune system. Santa absolutely needs one as he braves the cold wintry night.
Oh my god, wow, Jesus Christ.
I mean, yeah, you hear that, Obama. They're trying to be cute, but Sanda is a fucked if he doesn't get that whole milk. Yeah, this just feels like it's like a like rejected copy for the latest like got Milk campaign, right yeah.
Yeah. Also by that logic, it sounds like, honestly, if Santa needs this help, I gotta be like, okay, plain chicken breast brown rice.
Yes right, right, doesn't mean fat.
If if that doesn't convince a room full of very unseerious congress people, I don't know what will to be honest.
But then pardon me. I was thinking, I'm like, it might be cruel to Virginia Fox or is she just doing like this old school teacher like logic.
But she the shit she says like is always fucking stupid. So I'm like, no, this feels the way she was like like on par with yeah. Yeah, because other things like when she was like in like labor hearing, she's like the problem with Americans is they don't like to work. Yeah, they're lazy and I'm like, okay, that that feels like very conservative brain. But this I think it was just sort of like the labored reading from the paper that made it feel very like you got them with this shit.
Because there's already a war on Christmas, so I don't have a war on Santa too.
American labor needs to take a page from Santa's book and does it all himself. Yeah, exactly, pulls himself by his sack straps.
Now, she's an old, older woman who is apparently an expert on Santa. Have we ever seen her and Missus Claus in the same room?
Yeah, oh shit, actually that because it's gonna turn into a real Housewives probably exactly. Missus Klaus was like, oh so you brought your side piece through. Okay, okay, Virgina, you know so much about Santa? Okay, Oh you know about how how he likes to drink milk?
Come okay, all right, okay, let me take my earrings off for a fucked up this leader Carolina real quick.
Yeah ho ho hoes, I'm thinking about it.
Yeah that's oh yeah, Santa. I think Santa's not out here. Yeah I was. Let me tell you, man, he wasn't delivering gifts to me, so you know he's just fucking.
That's right.
I have no evidence of him dropping gifts off. So missus Klaus, you need to be worried about where the fuck he's at on Christmas. That's true, a really good point. He's building up. Come to front of it one night a year to go have sex with Virginia Fox. Yeah. I been a good boy to take my sleep in North Carolina. That is a good boy.
I'm jealous. This is a rich older man who loves giving gifts. This sounds perfect for me.
Take me away in your sleep.
Yeah, its real estate and a company.
Come on, Yeah, he owns his own home.
Yeah, okay, I'm writing a letter this year.
Yeah, and you could probably wait him out. He might not be living that long anyway. You could do like an type thing, you know what I mean, somewhere the whole North Pole.
Wait. I love the idea that he's been going for centuries, but like now it's like.
On his way out because he hasn't met you. Yeah, that's what it is. You will unlock the health the health problems that you and I'll do it again.
And I've changed my name many times.
Yeah, but just the dairy industry. So there there's a study that the only time that like heart disease has like significantly dropped in US history was when milk was rationed during World War during World War two, and then I think it started going down again, like once people have found out about skim milk and stuff like that. But for the most part, it's well that's bad for you. Yeah, the milk fat is bad for you. But US dairy
industry is incredibly powerful. It's like, yeah, the oil lobby, dude, they get the fucking government to buy their leftover cheese all the time. They're like, well, you got it. Someone's gotta buy this. They're like, fine, we'll put it in a fucking strategic reserve. They want skim milk. We gotta do something with this large Can you sell it to Domino's Pizza for five? From US Reagan.
It makes you realize that everything's kind of a little bit fucked because they got us all. Were you guys milk drinkers growing up, My pa made every dinner I'd have a glass of milk. And then you learn that like, no, it's not good for you. You vegetables are good for you. Milk is bad for you. It's sugary, and and then you realize you look into why and you're like, oh, because of lobbying. And then that was kind of my way into being like, oh, everything is lobbying. I see.
It is an easy way to get them to I have a five and seven year old, and it's hard to get kids to eat protein, and so milk is like the one way to do it. And it's because it's loaded with sugar and bad for them. Yeah, it's easy. Yeah. Yeah.
I also every once in a while I'll drink the glass of milk just to be like, you know, you want to do something fucked up today.
Yeah, I'm feeling nasty because like our our whole milk right is like three and a half percent I think out here, and like I thought it was three or maybe three yeah yeah yeah, and then skim is two or whatever. The other one's two percent. But I was like in Japan, right, like, I'm about to go to Japan, and the milk in Japan is so like you can buy it like over four percent. Really, Oh my god, it's that's just like heavy whipping crep.
I know.
But guess what, I'm fucking sick. Jack I'll fucking pound that shit. I remember as a kid right going to Japan, like my grandmother would always buy like fatter, like fatterier milk because you know, I've just pound all the time.
My mom was like and never when I came back to the US, I'm like, what the fuck the milk tastes like shit over here? My mom was like, yeah, because it's not fucking just piled up with all the fat and it like it is over there, like they don't have the government just cuts people off.
At a certain point, I'm like, oh, that's that's horseshit. Eating a bowl of like sweetened cereal like honey nut cheerios or you know what, one of those classic staples of the cereal aisle with whole milk. I know some people it's not. It's not for some people, but for me, that is like a revelation of like, oh, this is what cereal is supposed to be. So fucking you want to you want to ascend a christ consciousness? Yeah? Half and half? Thank God, that's how you get to Christ's
levels of consciousness. I will just say that. And maybe I was seeing Christ because I was having a mild cardiac event or something like that. But it is fucking crazy. Yeah.
I did it when I ran out of milk and I had was creamer for coffee and I was like, well, I gotta eat this granola. And I was just like at the end, I was like, oh, this milk is fucking wild.
Yeah, it's so good. It really feels like you're eating ice cream. I mean, yeah, well I eat it for just sert.
I could never eat that at breakfast anymore. It's just sweet. But I will fully eat high midnight. I'll be like for loops, baby, let's yeah, some thick milk.
I feel like we've not done. I feel like we've done what Virginia Fox wanted to do with this segment. We've been like, this is how it's done. Bitch.
Yeah, you want to see something fucking wild. Have some half a half with your fucking honey nuts, honey nut cheerios.
That's right, all right, let's take a quick break and we'll come back and keep talking about food that's terrible for you. And we're back back and we talked about how diet coke. I didn't realize this was like a TikTok, like so many TikTok trends. Are just like thing that I've been doing, or like that I've known that everybody's
been doing for a long time. But so diet coke, like taking a little DC break is uh has gone viral on TikTok And there's one part of the trend where they're talking about marinating diet coke.
Let me just yeah, let me let me play this clip for you where I was caught a little bit off guard by what I was hearing and and it turns out this is very normal.
But here's a bit of tiktokery about diet coke.
Now for the.
Mixology, we are using all of the principles that I've used in past di cokebreak recipes to make the ultimate die coke right here. So we have a frozen glass, we have a super cool die cooke that's been marinating for days.
We have our diet coke ice pop.
Okay, that was the part I said, what the marinating marinating for days? I said, the fuck is a diet coke marinating?
What does that mean?
I'll just I will let them speak in their own words as to the science behind a marinated diet coke.
On the trip that was over a week long, I don't think you guys understand what this means for me.
I've had a diet coke marinating in the fridge for.
Ten days, ten days, and she's about to make like limes and diet coke and pebble ice.
If you haven't seen a House Christ Di Coke break video before.
I center myself on the values, principles and.
Belief that the best die cokes are those that come in a can that have been marinating in the fridge for over at least three days. Three days is preferred, five days is really good.
Over a week is phenomenal.
In two weeks plus, we're talking a really crispy diet coke. I respect it. Ye oh yeah, every molecule is like
getting a lot. I love these sort of like gen Z driven trends too, because it truly is like vibes over science, like where you're like, yeah, I'm pretty sure like once it like there is no real bona fide scientific research into that that would back up these claims, but it reminds you like when you start smoking weed and you just love it, So everything becomes about how to make the experience that much better, even if it has nothing to do with what's real or scientific, Like
you're like, yo, dude, you got to cough out the hit and then if you cough harder, like you're gonna get even higher or is that not true? I always thought that was true.
That's true from no, well, it's probably just because the lung expansion that occurred because of the smoke made you hot, cough and you got higher. I mean, there's no there's nothing to see, just like that's gonna affect how much THC is entering your system.
But anyway, but it is.
It does follow that thing where you're like, bro, I will fucking take anything to get this shit to the next level. And that's what I definitely see here. And then when I asked around, I was like, okay, I superroduced re Becca. She's like broll dc EC culture is huge, especially like in the South, like she's like in Texas, it's fucking it's diet coke everywhere, all things diet cokes.
And I was like, damn. So I looked at some of the other trends are like other videos like around this hashtag there are like it's full on and they're like now people are debating if diet PEPSI actually gets crispier than diet coke. Oh no, and it does not.
Well, you got a there's a whole fucking a whole brigade of people just came through and they're like, ahaa, no, it's actually diet pepsi that is the crispiest if you marinate for at least four days.
First of all, I can't be I don't know science zeit gang. I'm curious, is there any possibility that the DC or DP are getting crispier between day three and day four? That feels that specifically impossible to me, But
maybe not. Maybe there's like an inner lining that is like slowly cooling, like an inner lining of the diet coke, right man, right, But I definitely had the experience of a diet coke that seems like it's gonna be perfectly crispy, but it hasn't been in long enough, and it's just like, oh, there's a little like warm core. Yeah, yeah, you.
Gotta have that refrigerator around like thirty six degrees. Oh you know what I mean for that crispy shit. But like I've never you know, like I've had I've discovered like kans of soda that I've like we're in the back of my fridge for weeks, you know, and I was like.
Oh shit, that's right, a stuff. One more from that, like twelve pack, and then I drink it and I'm not like fucking blowing, like my fucking eyes are opening, and I'm saying, like the source code because I'm like, this shit was so crispy fan You're breathing out like an icy mist, Like yeah, like an ice commercials. Yeah, nothing's cooler that nice.
I love a die Coke. I'm a die coke girl. I respect this girl, But I gotta say this is what makes me sad about gen Z being trapped inside during the pandemic, because this is what they got into. But this girl would have been so big into like psychedelics. She would have been like, this is the way you take a trip, man. She would have been bringing her friends out. She would have been like, we're all gonna do it a half an ounce of mushrooms and I'm
going to be your trip guide. But instead she's focusing that energy on diet coke, which is fine.
Yeah, it's like it's got to be a frozen The other thing is frozen glass, which just man is a very a chilled glass. I get that. That's this like same principles with beer, like and I get it.
Uh.
And also a glass straw is another thing. Everyone swears glass straw.
Yeah, I heard of metal st that's probably because they I don't know, maybe they're smoking tweak with or something.
After it works out chasing, this woman discovers drugs, the the Yeah, I don't know. I'm very picky about my diet cokes. I love a crispy diet coke there. You know, when you get the right mix of ice, coldness of the diet coke pre ice and coldness of the glass, like, it's really an unparalleled experience. The fact that she's gone with pebbled ice is interesting to me because that's just
more service than I typically want. But I guess if diet coke crispy enough, then maybe the pebbleed dice doesn't melt so quickly.
Yeah. Then, well, the other thing in that one video I showed you where she's like, I'm sticking to my principles. What she did was she made pebble ice with diet coke, right, But then you're just having flat diet coke melt into your they're not understanding where the crispy comes from. And that's why again I'm like, this might be the white
girl version of standing like McDonald's sprite. Yeah, you know what I mean, it's like, oh, the ship, the way it come out, like I'll fuck it and stuff like that. Then because I'm you know, I'm definitely McDonald's sprite gang in that sense because I think it tastes better or whatever.
I'm completely fucked up in that sense. So I get where you're going with the diet coke thing, but I think if you're really trying to like push the envelope, what you need to do is invest in some kind of like cryo tap system or you can ensure that you when you pull the tap, you have diet coke coming out of like a half degree above like freezing, so it can still maintain its liquid state.
I feel like, look like, let's fucking talk about science.
Like I feel like it feels like flat earther type shit too, where it's like, well, hey, they're interested in science. You know, even though you can't marinate a fucking can of fucking soda, I don't know a process that is, but we can talk about what maybe the optimal temperature is and how to get that to come out of a surf like a surfing thing like a tap or something.
But hey, you know we're on our journeys.
Yeah wait, I just got I'm sorry, I just got so nervous for this girl because I just know she's gonna try to put diet coke through a soda stream and blow her house up.
Oh my god, I just know.
Yeah, if she's listening, don't do that.
Dozens of people die that way every year. Yeah, be careful in search of marinate. It's spread marinated dit coke like marinate.
It's like, do you all even understand what marinate even means for fucking cooking?
Like, I'm not even cooking. I love that, man, Well.
Setting it up just because I set I've been setting up this diet coke aging, fridge aging.
Maybe that's crisping it, let's call it that.
I don't think the diet coke girls are the girls who are cooking a lot, and I respect that.
Yeah, yeah, sure, what did she pull out? She was like, and I like some lime with it, But then she like pulled out what looked like a green tea packet or something. Yeah, what she was here. I'll show you. It was like she's doing lime flavoring with lime lime flip. Well she has that pour is violent. Yeah, the violence, the violence of the poor. I feel like she doesn't like the crispiness as much.
Oh it's that weird crystal up.
Yeah, it's like water TikTok. It's water talk too.
Second measure.
Yeah.
Wait, she just poured a.
Packet of like lime crystal light.
Yeah no, I've seen these. It's like it's like lime juice crystallized. But wait, no, I've just I had so much respect for I just completely turned on her. She doesn't like diet coke. She likes to die coke with a huge amount of lime juice.
She likes. She likes. Yeah, she likes a cocktail that's on like almost like a Jack and coke at a bar. Without that, without the way, she's getting like smacked in her taste buds. Huh, hey jack. They're interested in science though, yeah you know, And hey, do you know where the concept of vibrational frequency even comes from? Oh? No, science, you know what I mean. Welcome, come on in, Come on in, Come on in, die coke TikTok, come on,
water talk let's talk. Let's talk about science. Well, Ian Lockwood, such a pleasure having you on the daily Zeitgeist. Where can people find you? Follow you all that good stuff.
You can find me online on all the platforms at mister Ian Lockwood. You can watch that new video for Orbo that I put out that I'm so happy about, and you can see me all over Brooklyn and sometimes all over the States. Just look me up there it is.
And is there a work of media that you've been enjoying?
Actually, yes, so I think I'm a musical comedian and I think we're kind of entering a golden age with musical comedy. So there have been two things that The first thing I've been listening to my good friend Kyle Gordon's a couple of tracks. He's putting out an album in March, but he was the guy who did Planet of the Bass and I cannot stop listening to that if you just know what that is. And the other thing, more seasonally is Matt Rogers. Have you heard of Christmas?
It's a Christmas album. It's comedy music. It's so so funny. There are tracks like the Hottest Female up in Whoville? Have you heard of Christmas. The title track Rockafella Senna, which is my favorite. It's one where they just sort of talk about tourists who visit Rockefeller Center and then they the whole song is just them listing people who work in the building. It's a really good album. Definitely recommend you check it out.
That's so funny. Have you have they even heard, Like I'm not asking, do they know it's Christmas? Have they even heard of Christmas?
That is exactly the bit.
Yeah, it's really fucking great. Miles working People. Find you. Is there a working media you've been enjoyed?
Yeah, find me at Miles of Gray wherever they have at Symbols. Obviously we have the basketball podcast, Myles and Jack got mad Boosti's and if you like ninety day Fiance, catch me on four to twenty Day Fiance with Sophia Alexandra. I don't have a piece of media, but I just did. I didn't want to share something. You know, we were
talking about Kenny de Forrest. He was in an accident last week and we had sent people the information to give to his GoFundMe, and tragically we found out that on Wednesday he passed away, and I just he was such a beloved guest and such a good guy, and we were just like, just so just so devastated, honestly
to hear about his passing. So, I know, I don't I don't know how many people may have heard about what had happened, but I just did want to bring that up in case you had heard about, you know, what he'd been going through, because it's definitely something that's affecting this show.
And many other people in the comedy world. I'm sure you've seen people, many people post when eulogize him, because he was really a fantastic person and it's just a fair guy and so funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah, So I just you know, I just want to have people keep his family and him in your prayers or your thoughts or whatever spiritual practice you have, because we lost a really really great person and and and sadly a good friend of this show. So rest in peace to Kenny. Yeah,
that's that's that's my piece for the moment. Yeah, I just wanted to share that. Yeah, I've just been that my my work Maydia is just going through him, like all the pictures of him and you know, just short clips of him backstage or you know clips of a stand up. I've been really enjoying the Left Behind a lot of great work and was great. Well he was with us. So you can find me on Twitter at Jack Underscore. Well, Brian, you can find us on Twitter
at daily Zekegeist. We're at d daily Zeikeist on Instagram. We have a Facebook vanpage and a website Daily zeikeist dot com where we post our episodes and our footnote where we link off to the information that we talked about in today's episode, as well as a song that we think you might enjoy. Whiles this is there a song that you think they might enjoy?
Yeah, this is This is just a nice instrumental track by Abstract Orchestra. They like to take, you know, seminal pieces of hip hop instrumentalism and give them full band arrangements. This comes from the Mad Villain album obviously, that's a collaboration between m F Doom and mad Lib and this is their take on Accordion, which is a lot of people's favorite song from that album.
So this is Abstract Orchestra with Accordion. All right, well, we will link off to that in the footnote. The Daily Zeikeeist is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from my heart Radio is the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. That's going to do it for us. For this week, we have the weekly zeit guys coming out over the weekend and then back on Monday to tell you what was trending over the weekend and we will touch all. Then bye bye