That's the thing.
I'm like, people just need to fucking stop fearing getting ran out.
So what I'm gonna talk about, I'm gonna talk about a little bit of that. What's overrated. I'll tell you what's overrated. Staying alive. Yeah, risk your goddamn life, especially if you are me because I'm no kids, so they should have likeded me, you know, because I'm ready to.
Die, to die the biggie kid kidding, I'm not Gladdy. You do you need to remix that album cover ready to Die? It's no biggie, It's just you on a baby's body. Hello the Internet, and welcome to season three eighty seven, Episode five of dirt Ey's I Guys Stay production of iHeartRadio. This is a podcast where we take a deep dive into America's shared consciousness. And it is Friday, May ninth. Five mm hmm.
Yep, May nine, Sure the ninth be with you. Let's see that's National Knockout Rose Day.
What the fuck is that about?
It's something about It's like a pre Mother's Day rose thing. It's also, oh shit, National Alphabet Magnet Day. Shout out to all of us that can actually still read into the future.
Good luck.
Please use these magnets to familiar yourself with our alphabet. Also National Sleepover Day, National Butterscotch Brownie Day, National Moscato Day, and National Lost socc Memorial Day.
Oh man, alrip to some real ones that we've lost out there, the lost ones. You might win some, but you just lost one.
How long?
What's your average lifespan of the side, Because I'm real, I'm burned through those shits quick. My heel is like made of alien blood or something. Oh really, I'm getting a hold heel holes NonStop, and facts like they last under two years. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know. I mean, I'm also barefoot a lot of the time. Yeah, so I don't.
I don't put mileage on my socks unless I'm wearing shoes. So I have socked for I have socks that you know, predate me doing starting Reagan administration, I mean, legit like Obamas.
I have Obama. So Obama socks. Easy, I go Obama to the Obama sons.
Yeah, Obama socks.
As the kids say, weird flex.
And that is what I say. And they do say that all the time. They do weird flex. But okay, my name is Jack O'Brien aka cyber trucks are crashing dumpsters on wheel. If that is your ride, we know you hile. Both it and your heart are truly vile. That one courtesy of Halcions out on the discord. Thank thank you for allowing me to continue the pure joy I felt reading this media article about just how cyber
trucks completely stopped selling. They just like stopped, they slowed production and it's still just to pile up at the cyber truck factory, just ten thousand of them fuckers. They can't they can't move at all in La.
The vibe now is horribly humiliate, humiliated cyber truck driver and arrogant maga freak asshole driving. Yeah, like there'll be people who like want the attention on their cyber truck, and then people who have Limo tint on their windows because they like even on their windshield because they don't want people.
To fucking see them in there. But hey, that shit went a cool threeal that was a big one eighty because people were like, I've pre ordered three Like everyone was like you gotta get your hands on these, and now you cannot sell them to a used car lot. They're like, I don't know, man, Like, we'll give you a ten thousand for the tires. Yeah, you know. Anyways, I'm thrilled to be joined once again by my co host, mister Miles Gray.
Yes, it's Miles Gray. And that white smoke you're seeing it's not just from his lungs. It also means a pope has been chosen. They call me American Man, Pope man. I try to give them all some cope and hope man, God's only spokesman. Shout out to Christy Ambacunci mean the tract, dope man, So quick, look at that quick turn.
We really like are recording this as there's still probably white smoke above the Vatican. Yep, yep, Pope hath been chosen, first American born.
American pope Man?
Is that something?
American Pope man?
Mm hmm, I mean, I don't let me be he Miles in our third seat, dude, American fucking pained from that. Dude. Look at Chris's face. He started grim miscing when we did that.
That's me, my Warren Oates. I'm not kidding. That's due to internal turmoil. People like my whole life have been saying you look like I feel.
On my worst day. Hilarious stand up comedian as a musician, he is my American Pope. You can listen to his podcast Colebrew Got Me Like Anywhere. His book, The Advice King Anthology, available anywhere. Fine books are sold.
The Audio Windows Audio and book next week.
The audio book is coming out next week next week, and it's read by by me.
It's so good. It's so good. It's like a fucking nine hour comedy album. And also it's got an intro by my mom. My mom read the intro.
Incredible, and she practiced.
She practiced for the intro. I think I told you guys by reading like obituaries out loud in the kitchen because she didn't have a book. She's like, I want to practice reading the intro, but you didn't give me a book.
So that's the spiritual equivalent of your book.
Practicing reading obituaries out of the newspaper.
I mean, that's part of the newspaper. Bro. I love that work ethic too, like nobody practices.
No.
Unbelievable, you know what I mean?
She like that warmed my heart, It was unbelievable.
Warmed mind too. You give that job to.
Me, I'm outsourcing it to AI. I'm just chatch.
You're like chat cheapt How do I get out of this?
Make up an excuse for me? It's Chris motherfucking crafting.
What's up?
Ah?
I'm still Chris Crofton. Ah, I'm still Chris Crofton. And if you don't recognize that hit, then you might recognize this even Chris Crofton surrive like Chris Crofton two borl jam songs for a price of one.
Swish swish double swish craft.
And hashtag and sausted hashtag sad.
Yeah, it's like that dunk I forget who did it in the dunk contact where he jumped up, dunked and then as the ball was coming down, dunked the ball a second time. Yeah, yep, that's yeah, Chris. Wonderful to have you.
Hey, good to be here. I'm so thrilled to see you. Guys.
Trying to think of what actor you remind me of? Uh, do you ever you know Warren Oots?
Come on, man, come on, this is this is stop acting like my eighth grade ceramics teacher before we went on. When we were doing this, you know, they're fishing around for a cold open, so they these guys make they make fake conversation with the guests and act like they like them or something. And then I cut it all up into some money making thing, and uh, I called the cold open that everybody loves even though it's just
starting the show. But during that cold open, I told them a story my eighth grade ceramics teacher who and you, And then Jack said, like, how teachers back then and like I'm talking about eighty three eighty four. Yeah, Uh, they didn't. There was nobody like telling them what. They just said whatever the fuck they wanted.
Yeah, so they'd be like, yeah, like you had the regional manager from like a paper company in your classroom with like a bunch of twelve year olds.
Yeah. And the worst for me was the coaches, because the coaches were the same way. So they'd be like they'd be like I'd show up and like, you know, they throw a few balls to me or whatever and I'd miss him or and they'd just be like, you suck. You're like eight, they're forty. So this this teacher said, you look like Warren Oates, which you know, I was in eighth grade and I had never.
Might actually use that as the cold opens Okay, I doesn't recap him, but.
Anyway, Warren Oates, if you guys don't know him, he was the lead character in a Well. He was in a lot of Sam Packing Paw movies. He was in He was the lead in Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia, which is a deranged movie. He was in Two Lane Blacktop, basically just frowning and he always looks concerned, and he also looks like grizzled. And he's a character actor.
And when you're in eighth grade and you never had a girlfriend before, you're kind of hope and that somebody tells you look like I don't know, somebody marking a ball with other graders, you know, like it's something an eighth grade girl he might find attractive.
Like Steve McQueen and so.
Exactly. That would have been something. But no, my teacher said, you remind me of Warren Oates, and I said, who's that you? Hopefully she was like, you know, but she wasn't wrong, but she did say that she I do kind of look like him, And I ended up playing him in a music video. My friend William Tyler made a music video and based on two Light Lame Blacktop and I played Warren Oates. But Warren Oates, Yeah, he's a character actor, not what an eighth grader wants to
be you want to be. You guys aren't going to remember no one on the show. Someone google Willie Ames or or you know, Leif Garrett. That's what you're not looking for. You're not looking for Warren Oates. And then she says, you don't exactly look like him. It's your facial expressions which all frown. He's always playing an alcoholic.
So she she was cute after he died. Also, I just want to note, did he die that young? Was like fifty four in nineteen eighty two.
She actually was paying me a compliment because then the sort of wax figure kind of place I grew up, where eybody was just a bowl cutted lacrosse player. It kind of was like a compliment to look like a character actor.
Oh, okay, you got some edge to you.
Yeah, but yeah, but she was. It was just an odd thing to say to me, because she had to know I wasn't going to know who he was. And then when I finally found out, it was because he was in Stripes, which is a movie that's also one thousand years old. I love everybody's listening right now. It's just like, what are they?
I caught that on Comedy Central with Bill Murray as a kid.
Yeah, so the sergeant in stripes is and that's how I found out about him. And I was like, Oh, it's the it's the sergeant from right right.
I guess I'd be like my eighth grade year is like a teacher's like, you remind me of Hugo Weaving.
I'm like the guy who plays Agent Smith.
Anyway, teachers, shut the fuck up.
Yeah, just don't don't don't comment on what I look like. Okay, it's my turn. You look like shit? All right, Chris, We're thrilled to have you. We're gonna get to know you a little bit better in a moment. First, we're gonna tell the listeners a couple of the things that we would talk about later on in the episode, if we were to ever get to it'll be a long one.
We're talking about it all.
We're gonna talk about Fetterman, God, Jesus. Yeah, time to go five. We're gonna talk about Mega had like their own fire festival sort of thing. It's like a scam event that. Yeah, with like great video that highly recommend everybody. Well, well we'll talk about it's a just great shot in Freuda happening out there in the world. I might even
mention in passing that there's a new pope and he's American. Hmmm, he's from Chicago, but they call him the Latin Yankee because most of his work was done in Peru or all that. Plenty more. But first, Chris Crofts and we do like to ask our guests, what is something from your search history that is revealing.
Last night, I was in ketamine therapy and so I'm in the recliner and I'm on the high dose now really like sadly the way I calm myself down when when when the drug is first coming on as I fucking look at my phone, which is so sad. It's like it's like holding my little mommy, you know. I look at Instagram and I'm like, I must still be alive.
Yes, it's fucking horrific for people. For listeners who haven't listened to the last episode. Keatdemine therapy is this is actual ketemine therapy, like with medical staff delivering it to you at a clinic. Yeah, not sitting on a pile of old tires, like in a yard.
Yeah, so I have chronic depression. I've had I've had chronic depression, you know, ever since my ceramics teacher set up. I looked like fifty year old character actor when I was in eighth grade and I I started, well, I started taking z all off at some point in the nineties and then I was still drinking, so I don't know what it was doing, but I was trying to
have it both ways, you know. I was like, I could drink and also I'm like the doctors are always like you can't do both, and I was like, watch me, I'm a special you know.
Oh yeah, you haven't met year.
Old character actor. That's all I'm gonna say for the rest of the show. Only joke. So so anyway, like as all off sucks and as I've gotten older, like it really, I mean, the biggest thing it does is it cuts your sex drive down, which is not a big deal when you're twenty eight, but when you're fifty six, it starts to be pretty annoying. And it might explain why I've been writing all these poems, because I'm like, are you a poet? Or do you need supplements?
Right?
So I think you know whoever that guy was hung around the pond all the time, had low tea helpful?
Who is it?
I always get them. Yeah, you can't make any money being obsessed with ponds these days, I'll tell you that.
Yeah. Yeah, so uh.
I started talking to a therapist again about trying to get off Zoloft, and I just they all kind of have the same You either kind of can take them and you don't have serious side effects, even though I've never met anybody who didn't have have side effects, but they allege that there are some people who don't. I don't know. I hope I'm glad for them. But I always get side effects, whether it's nerves, like if I take well Buttrin and I go completely. They always recommend
well Buttrin. Like when I say I want to get off Soloft, and I think I've used this, you guys, I've been talking about on my own podcast, so I might overlap. But you know, the time I took well buttrick in LA and I was like feeling like every time I take well buttra In, the weird energy I get from it, which is actually anxiety and kind of mania. I start to think I'm like getting better for the
first like month. But I was in the car, like driving on the two, and I was like, I realized that I was listening to Pink Floyd the final cut really loud, and drinking of Vanila Latte, neither of things I do, yes, And I was like, I do not listen to the Pink Floyd sound possible, so possible. Pass on a sunny day in l A normally, and.
You may find yourself sipping a van.
And that's when you finally say enough, well beuture and you go back on Zoloft sadly. So anyway, I started taking Kenemede. I mean, you know, I went through a whole bunch of stuff. The brand of the drug is Bravado, which I don't know if I told you guys last time, which I think is so funny and I think is called Bravado in the in the nasal spray form that
I'm doing it. I do it Mondays and Wednesdays, and I've done about probably about fifteen, no, maybe twelve or fifteen of them at this point, and I do think it's helping. So I'm gonna make fun of it because I think I talked about it last show where it's just like kind of like doing kedemine a Jiffy Loube or something like. It's like the people who help you, you know, like they're just low paid people. Like it's a venture capital model for every business, including Ketemine treatments.
So you know you're not gonna have shuffle through.
Yeah, yeah, you just have these sort of like well intentioned but low paid people trying to help you, you know, and they also shuffle everybody through. They shuffle people through every job there. So at this point I've held hands with like just about everybody in the building while I thought I was dying, you know, like and they're like, you know, I saw, like you see the guy in the parking lot blowing leaves, and he's like, you're doing better man.
Today today.
Remember when you told me about your childhood for while you were peaking. So it's kind of like dripping with strangers and which is odd, but I have gotten to be able to get through it. But Okay, so I'm in this office park and you're kind of stoned on ketnemine, so like you have the same kind of thoughts, like like office park, I started thinking about that term, you know, for a while, and I was just like, what the fuck?
Like even that, I was like, I think I'm having a bad trip of only kind of parks America, you know, like yes, you know what I mean, Like Office Park was enough for me to like.
Top three parks number one, I'm using the park number two, water park number three. This is the only three good parts.
So yeah, so I was like I was already like because it's like they give you the nasal spray, you take three of them one and then wait five minutes and then you have another. And that was the dose I did the first couple of times, and I still freaked out, but I have managed to calm myself down and let myself get through it. And it's not easy, and I think that's helping helping me. Is I realized how wound up I am. And did I tell you
I found a Johns Hopkins katamine playlist? Did I tell you that time last time?
No? But that makes sense. I mean john Johns Hopkins is like at the forefront of medical research, and I think they do a lot of stuff now for now.
Yeah, so that's what I said to the Like, Also, I talk politics when I get like high. So it's like everybody in there was.
Like, oh God, this guy like here you go about here you go.
Yeah, he's gonna talk about the fucking darkest ship when we go in there. Let's not go in there. I pressed the panic button and they're like, I'm not going in. No you go, I don't want to hear about Irish history. Yeah, from a guy says he's dying because I did that one time. I talked about Irish history for a really long time. I was the guy and he was like, Okay, I gotta I gotta go check on other patients. Are you I don't think you're dying, probably because you're talking
a lot. So I don't even remember what I'm talking about.
What did you just you just googled office Park.
No, So I was like, this is what happened. I'm looking at my Instagram on kedemy and I'm taking the full dose now and I'm managing it and I'm feeling pretty good about it. But it does help me to look at my phone to just keep me from freaking out. And then I listened to music too, and I did look up some one of the doctors did say, hey, do you listen to anything while you're doing this, and I said, no, I think it'll freak me out. But I was imagining listening to like Bob Dylan or something,
and I was like, no, there are Spravado playlists. There are Ketemy playlists on Spotify. So that made it feel like I wasn't gonna die because I was like, they can't be making playlists for something that kills you. I don't think, yeah, right, right right, And and Johns Hopkins, even though Johns Hopkins is probably completely defunded and run by you know, Kelly and Conway. Now, it still made me feel better that it was a Johns Hopkins playlist.
I was like, they can't be making playlists for people to get killed by. So but then that made me think of a million that made me think of all kinds of jokes, like I actually, I accidentally listened to the Wells Fargo playlist.
What is the Is there anything surprising here?
We go, Oh no, No, it's just a bunch of flute music, you know, like wood flutes and stuff. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, you remember Sam Fear, the magic flute guy. Nope, based advertises his stuff on TV in the eighties, nineties nineties. Sam Fear was a guy who was a big celebrity on nineties late night TV because they sold his wooden flute music before you could get like, you know, mood music on your phone. So my friend sends me this on Instagram while I'm
on keemy, and it's a tweet. This is that vanishingly rare occasion when someone says fun fact and then tells you something that is just insanely fun. And what he sent me was this WhatsApp that someone retweeted and it says fun fact for the day. Carl Marx's great great grandson has a park poor YouTube channel called exclamation Marks.
Wow and that's real.
Yeah, So I was wild. I wanted to find out if it was real. So I wrote Here's exactly what I wrote to my friend. I'm on ketamine. I'm already like pretty upset about the term office park. To show you where I'm at, like really upset, like this is unacceptable, like that kind of upset. And then I said, no fucking way, please hold. And then I went looked. I said, the world is bonkers. I'm in a recliner on ketamine
right now, in a quote office park. And I just watched Carl Marx's great grandson Duparc and someone commented, the floor is capitalism. Oh wow, this cannot be real, And then I wrote, and yet dot dot dot. So that's it. That's my that's my social media. I mean, that's that was absolutely the fact that I watched Carl Marx's great grandson du Parkour means that were absolutely fun.
I don't think the simulation could come up with that too. That's too weird, that's too much.
That's up.
Let's take a quick break. We'll come back. We'll hear some overrated underrad.
And we're back.
We're back.
I gotta say. I just looked on the Johns Hopkins. They got like playlists for like every psychedelic drug.
Yeah, it's pretty nice. Is it all flute music? Is there any like? Are there any bops on there?
It looks like a lot of it's like classical like just stuff that's sort of I don't think. Yeah, I mean, I hopefully i'll find any Andre three thousands flute album.
No, there is Alice DJ. Better off alone though you think you bad? I don't know if that's good. I rave music from the.
Yeah, you gotta be careful gotta be careful. You're you gotta be care of it.
They're gonna send a takedown notice. Yep, sorry, sorry, Chris. I'd love to hear something that you think is underrated.
Underrated is let me look at my notes. Actually I prepare it here. Uh you said underrated, right.
You know what you've been on. You decide if you want to go under I messed it up. I messed you underrated, underrated looking at social media on ketamine.
That was what my thing. So we could killed to cover that. That was what I wrote down. That was what I wrote.
History answer.
Yeah, we'll do it backward, kill me web search. I forgot my web search. I did have one for the web search. And this is just something if people want to it's very boring. But I did see that there's some guy who puts trained wheels on his car, like he has a hydraulic system where he can retract it.
And d the rails.
Yeah, have you seen that ship? Yeah, I've just seen it backward.
But I don't know if I've seen a car that has everything, but I've seen it. I've seen a car that had like the prop like the ship on a car so he could ride on rails.
That's it. So this guy like, it's just this video. There's like two million views on it of you know, some kind of hobby that you do at the end of the world where you put train wheels on your car and then you drive along abandoned train tracks without checking ahead of time to see if they they're abandoned. Yeah, or just like a tree. I mean they're just speeding through the forest getting slapped in the face by branches and they're just like you who, And there's like their daughter.
There's like a five year old girl in the car, which I'm sure was actually bad ass. I mean, she probably had a great time, and everybody in the comments is like, she's never gonna forget this, you know, goes down.
The Yeah, go head on with a fucking freight car.
Yeah, also until he find out it goes directly into an abandoned mine right there by combining my two favorite things.
Or they run over a damsel as somebody with a mustache looks on and snickers to himself.
Yeah, you know, so that's just like if you want to look, there's some people who go on train tracks with I would definitely do it. This one that I saw it seemed dangerous. Was one like a train track through the woods, I mean going through on a train track through the desert like that seems I've seen people do that. That's kind of fun. But this guy just ripping through the forest on.
A I like, you've seen enough train you're like, Okay, obviously we've seen the one where the dudes on the in the in the desert, dude on the outfit is on the riff.
This guy was in the fucking forest.
Well, there's like a lot of abandoned train tracks out by the abandoned mine. So every now and then those guys probably get bored and like there's they put on they build these little things that go on the rails. I've seen that, yeah, yeah, but this one is like this is dranged, Like you don't go through the woods on them, on them?
Wait, why do you think the woods is more?
Does you want to get hit in the head?
Oh, you're saying with like there's the low hanging I mean you can't takes you out.
Yeah, you can't clear the you can't clear the tracks or see what's coming in the woods. So it's seems like kind of insane to bring your daughter along for like a you a mystery ride straight into a gorge.
I'd say no activity has been ruined for me harder by movies than standing on or near train tracks like I because like during the eighties, no movie included train tracks that didn't then have somebody turned back and see like white smoke coming and getting you know what I mean, Like it was just it seems to me to be an inevitability if you are near, like the idea of driving on abandoned train tracks is like, well, that's a
fools game. Obviously it's not really abandoned, and there's going to be a train coming like Ghostbusters to stand by me like all those all those movie that was a ghost train and went through them. But it doesn't matter. It still pays off the like if you are by tracks like it's trains coming coming, it's come like it's never not happened in a movie. And therefore, in my brain, I'm like, there's a ninety five percent probability when I'm near train tracks that I'm about to get.
Do you ever, do you ever go near like a like a train crossing that's clearly not active anymore, but in your mind you're still like, nah, bro, that the tracks aren't there.
Yeah, I'm like, this fucker's about to blow through here. Light it all up.
Man, now this I feel that way. I feel that way too. But these these tracks were so overgrown that I was like, not so afraid of, like watching this guy do this. I was not so afraid of a train coming because they were so overgrown. But but I was afraid of like, you know, a snake to the face or ah, or like a lemur to.
The face, also an eighties trope, snake to the face going through some over overgrown thing. You're gonna catch a snake, but.
Yeah, or or you come out and you don't notice there's a snake in your hair and they go.
Uh, you kind of got something there. Wait I mean no, yeah, you're right.
Yeah. Yeah, that was good. That sounded like a real movie man.
No problem, no problem, Hey, really good guys. Way to go. Wow, you guys sounded like a shitty movie there, Way to go. Really impressive. Good that you guys can sell like a ship a patch you on your back, man, Chris Croft and what some of you thinks overrated.
Overrated cowardly politicians.
Come on, now, I've never.
And I'm just talking about this I'm talking about on a serious note, that we just had ice raids here in Nashville, Tennessee, and uh, people are still walking around in yoga pants. Uh and and and playing indoor miniature golf and stuff. And I just feel like, uh and and and and this is sad because I understand that. I think our mayor, who I actually know, was well
intentioned when he ran. But he thought Kamala Harris is gonna win, and he thought some now things are just going to be okay, and then he was going to be able to be a fun mayor that was going to work on public transit. And then Kamala Harris didn't win. And I would argue that even if Kamala Harris had one, anybody who's paying attention knows that something very bad is
happening in our country. So I just I just he was hoping to be a sort of two thousand's Obama era kind of mayor that's optimistic, and he did it. He did it for the last few months like he was like djang and going to every hot dog competition or whatever the fuck mayors do.
All Right, I'll stuff right there, because that's all I asked for from my mayor is djang and hot dog competitions, those.
Judging hot sauce or whatever, judging longest hot dog.
I think that yeah, like old time mayor ship, but it is not old time times.
It can fucking be a street fighter, basically.
And he is in big trouble now, big because he kind of had to, especially in a red state like Nashville, but probably like Tennessee, but I would say probably in every state. At this point, you have to make a deal with the cops. You have to back the blue, or you will the police will make your life miserable, Like I mean, they'll just somehow a mayor is gonna have to get elected, is gonna have to say something about I'm gonna support the police because the police can
fucking take you out. So I think, you know, he doesn't. He tries to like boost the police while also saying he wants to help marginalize people, which of course makes no sense. And and he's stuck in that place. And then now the Nashville Police Department was seemingly involved in the ice raids. They're not supposed to be by law, but they.
Across the country collaboration.
But they showed up and they and and Freddie has my friend who's the mayor, is just in. He's he's he's done, he's done. Everybody's fucking I mean, they.
Kidnapped people incensed because yeah, like for everything that you kind of ride into office with, it's like where is that energy?
And how was he not prepared for this? This like was certain well, first of all, it was like a fifty to fifty chance or whatever right that it was going to happen. But you know, people got kidnapped. I mean, they got This isn't like, this isn't like checking. This isn't a regular way to check for people's citizenship. You can't stop someone's car and then throw them at a bus,
you don't. They did stops, they did. They basically just put up roadblocks and just like in a in a Latin neighborhood and just fucking pulled people out of cars that couldn't couldn't in ten minutes tell them that they were a citizen. Yeah, even though a lot of times they don't even speak English, and those cops, I mean, anyway, it's just like and now it's like.
Well on top of that too, they don't even have an argument about public safety like every every story I read about people getting caught up in ice rates, it's like it's some kid in college who's like doing good in school or a person who just goes to their job and the whole time, like we got to get the worst ones out, but then the problem, but that just cover to do this whole terror campaign. But like they've even lost this like argument that it's even about
public safety. Oh definitely, And I just think like that's another thing where it's like, even for a mayor who probably is afraid, you can at least say that it's like these what where are the people? Where the criminals that you're trying to get these people are contributing to the country?
What the fuck is this is not? You can't split the difference on this. You can't fight a coup and say you're a Democrat. That you can't. There's no Republicans or Democrats anymore, no one. We're just not. I understand there's there's no way for people to to get everybody on the same page about that as impossible, But there's just people who are doing a coup and kidnapping people out of cars, and then there's other people there's.
No Yeah, then there's the other people who are like, well, I don't want to get, you know, elected out of office, so I'm just gonna stay as quiet as possible.
And I think that's what your point is.
And I want our politicians to be I wrote it. I wrote a column today, my advice column. I recommend everybody read it. It's it was a sort of a silly question, but it was meant to be. I think, oh, I took it seriously because it was the question was who are we supposed to root for? Between the sky net Ai and oligarchs, who are we supposed to root for? And I wrote, you know, we make I make six hundred dollars a week. I can't root for anybody because
doesn't fucking make any difference. The only thing I'm rooting for is we drop individualism and start collectivism, because that's the only way forward. And I just, you know, I said, Martin Luther King, Doctor Martin Luther King, pray for us. Harvey Milk, pray for us. Eugene Debs pray for us. I to b Wells, pray for us. You know, we need real, real people, and you know we're not going to get any of the elected officials we have now we're elected before they somehow didn't see this coming. So
we eat all new people. And those are gonna have to be people with people in the street, because if you're talking about getting elected again and that's important to you right now, then you are not on the right side.
Yeah.
So if you have kids, I understand, like he has kids. This is all a pitch for like, I want to be mayor, but I can't. I'm not gonna because it's just I can't. But but but I'm saying we need people, maybe younger people than me, who don't look like nineteen fifties character actors or whatever, you know, people who look less mad than me, you know, who don't have kids go in there, especially my age. We've already lived had
I've had so much fun. I mean, what do you need to do, really, I mean, we're all going so let's put our necks on the line for the kids.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean you had a pretty good pitch right before you said you you want to be mayor and you're ready to die.
Yeah, ready to die? I mean I don't want to die, but I mean, like, did Martin the King Junior want to die?
No?
Did fucking any of these any of these activists, but they were willing to you know who they all died, I mean, you know, and because they were like brave.
Well, yeah, spoke with conviction and and they they stood on their beliefs a lot of the time. And yeah, at this crop of politicians we have are people who mimic that, but when push comes to shove, they abandon all of those you know, sort of perceived morals that
they espoused on the way to office. And I think, yeah, we need more people like just to not fear getting voted out of office, because the ship you can do in it one term, like the there is things you can do, and then yeah, if they get you out, they get you out.
But at least you went in there and you still for something.
And I don't know who it is, but I mean somebody somebody who's willing to you know. I mean, say you get say someone gets into office and they made a deal with the police, Well you go back on that deal, now, right, It's as simple as that, and you risk it.
We've been doing it the other way for yeah.
Yeah, and you risk getting shot.
Yeah, but yeah, your point is taken that it's not a safe position to be in to be anti police. We will link off to your column in the footnote. Nope, we should uh talk about somebody who's really talk about like the difference between where they were when they were running for office and where they're at now. John Fetterman, it's just like it's getting like scary kind of Oh yeah, Yeah, there's a New York magazine article that was published last week about just like he like it's really like he's
getting into car accidents, he's like fighting people. He's just kind of unable to do any of the things that are part of his job, and people are concerned. Yeah, his family, especially like the you know, he got into a car accident like at a time when like it, right before it, they were like messaging his doctors being like, hey, like this is really unsafe that he's able to like drive at all, and he like refuses to stop looking at his phone while he's driving.
Yeah, I mean, just.
All of it right, like wild It's all kind of branches off from the stroke that he had on the campaign trail and then from there like then he remember he also said he was hospitalized with, you know, with depression he was dealing with and a lot of people were like, that's great, you know, like we support you, and but a lot of his staffers have noted that it feels like he's starting to regress in a really
measurable way. And also just stroke with like stuff from the like auditory complications he has just from the stroke.
Apparently he's regular.
I mean I saw a story about this a few months agogo, how he's like his attendance has been really low, like for votes and of like in this in this magazine art in New York magazine article, people say he just hides in his office basically like alone while the Senate is doing business. One staff equol. But it's pretty impossible to overstate how disengaged he is. He doesn't read memos, he's taking very few meetings. The job is just a
platform for him to run for president. That's all he cares about, which is like very odd because concerning how much he's alienated constituents, supporters, and even his own staff, especially around his like hardline stance with supporting Israel and like every terrible act they make against Palestinian people, It's just like I don't know how you think, like who's your base exactly? Because many people are very confused as to what he stands for at this point, just out
like this. There's a lot of stuff like from him getting really fighting with his wife in front of staffers, crying while facetiming with staff It's just all kind of paints a picture of a guy who is definitely it just feels like he's in over his head in terms of doing the duties of a senator, especially in twenty twenty five, with all the shit that comes along with a quote unquote resisting Trump if any Democrat, I mean the few Democrats that do, but that along with his
physical and mental health, it's just all like every like so many of these articles about him are ending with people being like, I just really think it's time for him to really kind of take a step back for like his own sake. Like it just it feels a little bit like this is a little too much for him right now, which you know they typically don't do that for senators and the Democratic Party, Like yeah, no, no push to it, but it just sounds like there stuff is just so out there and in your.
Face that it's it's really hard to ignore. At this point. Diane Findstin and like all these other people who have been obviously like not able to do their job. But you know, the Democrats are just that, I guess because of the process of replacing one and like the game of like having you know, having as many Democrats possible. But it's just it's pretty ghoulish.
Today about him. They just you guys might have seen it, just that he I mean, it's just more leaked stuff. You know. It's like he freaked out at some meeting with the teacher and like started repeating himself and then said said, I guess quote, I don't know why, but he's mad at me. I didn't do anything, Yeah, like.
That, everybody is mad at me? Why does everyone hate me? What did I ever do? Yelling banging his fists on a desk at five union representatives, and then his aid.
Cried, they like ushered them out. And then are these aids And why.
Can't they get other jobs? That's what I want?
I mean, that's because that's getting into on a Senate staff, Like getting staffed in a Senate office is like kind of like you know, that's how you claw your way into it.
He was on for dear life, no matter what happens.
Yeah, and I think that's what, Like, you know, a lot of a lot of the anecdotes and reports are coming from a lot of people current and former staffers who are just like, it's kind of it's freaking us out. One I think his former chief of staff said he was worried that he was not taking his medication like his doctors.
Had told him to. And yeah, it's just again, this is this is this does not look good. And also like do you look at his votes, like like voted to confirm Pam BONDI like, there's just a lot of ship where you're.
Like, oh, he's whatever's going on.
He took a silver pager or gold pager from.
Yeah, yahu.
I mean he seems like his only policy at this point is to violently support Israel.
Yeah no, truly, that seems like the ones newly consistent things Israel is not in Pennsylvania. Yeah, well, you know, but again I think this is like one of those things too. You fear the outside spending and like for many people, that's apex spending that goes when you begin to articulate Propalestinian talking points, especially as an office holder in Congress.
Here's a joke about him, so staffers. One of his staffers is leaked that they're concerned about him because he's so sad. He's so upset that he's not even saying fee five fox FuMB.
When he enters a room.
He's not even climbing his beanstalk.
In your mind, he looks he's dead ringer for your asking the new jack in the bean stock.
Oh my godam I you know imagine he's also like physically imposing like I would. I mean, I bet they pulled furniture in front of the door. One he was like, is in there be like, I don't know why he's mad at me? You know, just get outside?
Fee five fo fum, I smell the blood of Olivia mun. That's pretty good. Oh wait, why is it English? Mone? Isn't how they needed something to rhyme with man fun I can be good of an english man.
Now, this podcast is where it needs to be.
Thank you, we're back, baby got They could have made anything up. The first part is jib fish.
Why not just I mean, if it's like British Eli, you're saying an englishman right in English? Mon fee five fem I smelled the blood of an English mun.
Oh damn that that guy sounded right proper miles. Thank you.
Think you could make money so many good ways back then, writing ship like that, sitting by a pond, writing ship like that.
It was so fucking low man. It was a golden age for people with low t They're only like eight hundred people, so it was just like, yeah, oh yeah, you see, this thing has just throws a banger and then like twenty people read it and you're like, I'm the most influential person. What do you call it? I don't know, haiku, I don't know.
They're making a decent wage. They like, you have a bail of hay. I love it.
Thank you actually too, Yeah, dude, what the heck we have?
Thank you for making it too far keep thank you for describing how fair a maiden my wife is.
It was one of what's his names? It was one of what's his name's ancestors talking about abundance.
That's right, Oh, what's it?
I forget his name?
Abundance, the abundance thing, Ezra client.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all.
Right, let's take a quick break and we'll be right back. And we're back, and it's shot in freud o on He's like geist every day every day, we like to just take a quick look at how things are going for some of the people who jump on jumped on the Trump train and expected that it was gonna go well for them, despite all evidence that everybody who sides with him ends up getting sucked over.
And yeah, at every level, even the grifters most of the time, unless your last name is Trump, because they're they're Donald Trump. I think doju is opening up a new social club that's like half a million ahead to get in, because again, everything's about access. And so the first one hundred days was like this thing.
Everyone on the right was talking about how epic to first hundred days this ministration would be, despite every metric indicating that it was a total shit show at the fuck Factory. And this was a moment for Trump sickophants to lie to his face, as we saw in that cabinet meeting, about his greatness and also a great opportunity
for outsiders to grift. And would that cabinet meeting, Chris, did you see the cabinet meeting where everybody just sat there trying to be like mister President here the finest human specimen of president. All right, I just like that was what that was like the moment for me for whatever reason, where you just like entered a new level of surreal fucking you know, dystopia. Shit, that's just like, oh we're we are in a movie now like this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's quite difficult to live, uh and keep your head on straight, especially with trying to raise kids. But I think everybody you know who's doing it is it's a damn hero because I do think that if you're, if you're and I know people who are taking care of their kids and stuff and in the face of all this because it will pass. I don't know if it'll pass with an ice age you have to wait
that long. But I mean, this will go away. You know, these people will pass away, they will blow away, whatever happens, and then you know, and it's worth hanging in there. But it is right now. And there was that New Yorker piece, which I wasn't crazy about it, but that one, did you read? It came out today or yesterday, just about like how my brain's finally broken. Okay, it was just written. It's it's it's great. I'm just mad. I'm jealous of anybody whos in the New Yorker but you know,
it's probably fine. I'm like, she's a pretty good writer. It is not that good. Oh there's no advice king, But anyway, so I'm mad at everybody. But but it's a good article. It's about just a list of like a laundry list of what people deal with on a regular basis, of deep fakes, and and just politics and just the endless, endless barrage of bad news. And so you don't even remember what the bad news was, or what day it is, or what time it is or anything.
You just are lost in your fucking phone and in the Internet. And everybody is this is probably peak disorientation for any human beings ever on Earth. I honestly I think that's true. You know what I mean, There's never been I mean, you were dealing with one dying this or one guy trying to throw us fucking a caveman, you know, I mean, like one guy's trying to hit you with a club, and maybe is there's no dinosaurs. I mean, I guess they didn't co exist. I don't know,
a cheetah whatever. You had two things, but you knew they were real. There was like a deep fake.
You had a tree, not a world where like half of what you see as fake. The yeah that says by.
Who Caveman saw a fucking deep fake. He jumping a damn waterfall.
I like that. You're like this damn Gia Tolentino, she's so great, Mars.
All right, Oh, well, you're probably not as upset as me, who doesn't work for the New Yorker, right.
Right, right, Well, at least you're gonna articulate both of those that that that that's already sets you apart from ninety nine percent of the people out there. But anyway, so this grift right because everyone is now everyone is susceptible, like you're saying, Uh, Two fucking hacks on the right, one guy who works for a daily caller, another one who calls herself an activist. They decided to team up
and really cash in on the excitement. The two quote planned to host what they described on the event's now deleted website as the official Celebration of President Trump's first one hundred days at the newly trumpefied Kennedy Center. Tickets for this event went from between one hundred dollars and twenty five hundred dollars. Keep that in mind, invitations promised an unforgettable evening where quote where quote, luxury meets excitement,
and I don't know what that means. There was also a promise of access to individual guests, members of the Trump administration, and members of Congress, setting.
EIGHTHI generator right, Luxury meets excitement. I feel it feels. This whole thing feels that I generated.
When you do that, luxury meets excitement. I don't even know what the line of cocaine is.
What it is, yeah, I guess yeah, Like you wear a ball gown while screaming racial slurs at full volume and do a little blow and you're like, this is the height of love.
We're a luxury exciting Yeah wow.
And you can get away with it. Isn't that luxurious?
Unbelievable?
So the problems began immediately once Trump announced that a rally in Michigan would be the event that marked the first hundred days. And once that potential big draw just went poof, the Kennedy Center canceled the contract with the organizers, and it forced the event to move to the equally glamorous Arlington, Virginia.
Okay and okay, yeah, I mean things still good. Still pretty good. It's not like geographically not that far from Washington, d C. So it's basically the president's approving the envy.
Yeah, you're there, you're there, you're selling access things. Get this is where things. This is where the details get real fucking spicy. So problems multiplied from there. McMillan, who's one of the organizers, acknowledged that she asked attendees with comps tickets to bring bottles of alcohol to fill out the bar, even though the website promised, quote premium drinks. Another organizer himself asked the husband of a photographer who had been hired to shoot the event to bring some alcohol.
As well the men to bring alcohol.
The man then warned the organizer to call off the party before a fire festival style debacle ensued. Quote you're charging big money for this thing, and people won't be getting what they paid for, the man wrote, According to messages later, when the photographer realized she wouldn't be paid to shoot the party, she.
Canceled the Instagram. The Instagram account under one of the organizer's names subsequently sent a message to the photographer with the line fuck you whore.
Both organizers deny that he sent the message, but they won't say who did.
Well, it wasn't us, and so who did it? Ah, we're not at liberty to say we're just as bothered by it as you are, but we can't say who did twenty from our account.
In twenty twenty five. Denying something means you did it.
Yeah, yeah, truly. It's it is actually just kind of noteworthy that they went through the effort of denying it. Oh yeah, you know.
And that's when like shit gets so that but then their defenses of it or what so, Okay, the event, the event finally come and it was I mean, was it a success? I guess if you consider the fact that it looked like total shit and people called the cops on them for not delivering what was promised.
Yeah. One guests said, quote there was no VIP, there was no red carpet like they promised. Like when I bought my ticket, we also said we would be quote in the company of high profile guests. I have no idea who those would have been, because I didn't see
anybody high profile. When asked if she had a different explanation for the ticket packages, right, because tickets were between like two hundred and two thousand dollars, Like, what explanation for different ticket packages not being what they were advertised? The organizer just said no.
The website also mimicked the official White House website. This is this is where the grift really comes in. And one of the organizers, again this woman was asked, isn't that deceptive to like have this sort of font, color scheme, everything mimic the official White House website while you're calling it the official hundred Days party.
She says, this is her defense quote.
If a color scheme and font needs somebody to believe although there are words on the website, they'd say exactly who the host is that this must be the White House putting this on.
I don't know what to tell that person. Wow. So yeah, real, real, real awesome grifters. Can you just explain, like what was the different? No? No, okay, I mean it looked cool, It looked fun. Man, I don't know, like you gotta kind of be there. It's one of those things where you gotta be there. Oh, I'm sorry, or looked tight. I'm sorry. Yeah.
This one clip from the dance floor is humiliating. This is from so the local GOP like outfit in Arlington, Virginia. They started posting shit because they're like, this is a grift. Beware of these fucking people, Chris, have you ever been to a party that looked this fucking sick? I'm just gonna play from the top. There's like literally eight people on the dance floor. There's a guy with a puppet on the ground. There's dancing.
He's not This guy's a maga hat he's waving around. Looks like a total dipshit this I.
Don't know this guy on there's a guy on the ground I think doing like a triumph type bit mm hmmm, because he's like just holding a puppet but laying down in front of a woman.
It's all that's the worst looking party you ever saw in my life.
Yeah.
Yeah, And you can't party with he can't party with a bunch of I mean, that's the thing is nobody. It's hard to say, but you know, it's like they've reinvented. They wanted to be the popular kids, you know, so they're like the only way they can do it is with violence. So that's what they're doing. So they've they've gotten to the top of the power structure. So now they're the popular brands as far as they're concerned, but.
Enforced popular kiddom.
But the kind of trash that they are makes it so nobody. They're still not going to have fun because they don't understand that charmless people have to get their shit together and become like, I don't know what, you know, do some work on themselves. You know. I know it's a popular thing to say, but someone like Donald Trump Junior, if he wants to have friends that are fun, he's gonna have to become a whole different person. You know.
The kind of people who are gonna come to Donald Trump's party are guaranteed to make him sad because he's expecting it to be. Like he really you know, he hates Robert de Niro, but he would love it if Robert de Niro would come. Like, these people are never gonna get what they want, which is actually approval from celebrities, like liberal celebrities, and they're never gonna get it, so they're stuck with just like another guy who thought violence was a way to get popular.
Yeah, I mean, they all share the thing where every person who like rises up on the like conservative side of things, I mean and either side, but like really it's really pronounced with the right right wingers especially who just go, no, it can't be that I'm the problem here, right, it's everything else. It's not me, and everything else needs to change.
Like, yeah, I'm gonna rearrange the world so i have a good time, instead of realizing the reason I'm not having a good time is because I probably we have a ton of trauma. Yeah yeah, yeah, these motherfuckers were not loved. I'm not saying that that excuse is anything, because it doesn't because there's lots of unloved people who who oh fucking I don't care.
I think we end on that. Chris crofton what a pleasure having you on the podcast? Where can people find you? Follow you all that good stuff?
Man? You can find me and follow me a whole lot right now, because I've got so many fun things going on. Next Wednesday in Nashville, Tennessee, at the Belcourt Theater, which is the one of the premiere art house theaters in the country, is showing the premiere of my documentary, or my my friend Seth's documentary about me called Chris
crofton Nashville Famous. It has it features like uh, I don't know, uh, it's got a bunch of if you if you're interested in the great people that are in and you can go to my instagram at the crafton show and see. But uh, you know, David Berman is in it before he passed away, and that's the thing that really means a lot to me. And it's just a beautiful it's a beautiful movie. And it's showing. It's on the schedule. Man, they're showing the trailer before other
movies and shit like this is insane. And I didn't it took ten years, so I wasn't I wasn't invested in it anymore. I mean, I was hoping he was gonna cut it together real quick and I could use it to get on shows in LA in twenty fourteen, you know, so that was and I was telling people like I was desperate. I was like, you know, new to LA, going to open mics and stuff and being like I got a documentary coming out, and all those people, you know, ten years, you know, ten years later they're.
Like, like, hey, let's up with that documentary?
What happened to that? Assholes saying? So it's out and it's exciting, you know, it's really exciting and it's gonna show out in LA hopefully in July. We were anyway, that's it's gonna show. We're gonna do a premiere in LA. We're just trying to find the venue. We wanted to do it, idiots, but it's just too expensive. So we're we're just we're gonna have something. We're gonna have a show in LA in July. And then on top of that, my audiobook, The Advice Can Anthology is out. Well, it
was supposed to be out next Thursday. There are a couple of files that were fucked up, but I think it still will be out around next week. And it's gonna be on every damn and it's gonna I love it so much, honestly, you guys, it's like it's it's like a comedy album. It's just based in this and it's just in this weird sort of format. But it's gonna be so fun to listen to on road trips and and and and you know wherever in the bathroom, at the gym.
Wherever you listen to it, in the garage, any room by a young Warren oates, any you want to hear Warren ots tell jokes.
Ye for nine hours. Then you sit in your bathroom and listen to this book.
That's so cool.
And then the other thing is my record is coming out in like July or August called I'm Your Man, and the first single is coming out. The video is already done in like July, and so lots of lots of lots. I mean, I'm excited, you know, and I'm excited. Uh, I'll shore I'll share you stuff. I'll share you the stuff with you guys. But but anyway, Uh, yeah, glad to be here. I was in an a meeting.
Hey, go support Chris and go check out the documentary Nashville Famous. I want to hear that people pulled up to Chris.
And you know, l A, that's gonna bro. We'll be there Wednesday.
At eight pm and I'm gonna perform like there's gonna be It's gonna be a special night in Nashville if you can make it. We've already sold a lot of tickets, so it's uh, it's gonna be a great night. I'm gonna perform a little bit Q and A. My mom and dad will be there bother We're doing a Q and A. I got an intro. We got the whole damn thing. It's a real I mean, it's really exciting and I'm very grateful. I mean, people from the Zech
Gang have been asking me about these things. And oh and Cobra got me like sorry, that show is fucking great now too. I mean it really has hit a stride. I mean, if you guys want to hear about the end of the world from a different podcast, but what.
Is what's a slightly different slant on everything going completely to shit? Amazing? Is there is there a work a media you've been enjoying?
Uh?
You know, this is the one I always let everybody down on. I don't know why. I think it's like not important, but I just have a hard time. I've been like enjoying I'll just tell you. And I've been enjoying the Red and Stimpy Instagram account, and I recommend it's just somebody. I don't know if it has something to do with the actual like people who made it, but it's just it's just great clips of some of the greats. I don't know if you guys remember Ren
and Stimpy, but it's an absolutely great show. And and and RN is this deranged chihuahua and Stimpy is this cat. I I can't even really, I don't even know. I think he's a cat, but man, oh man, Wren loses his mind and gets so mad all the time, and he gets so Madren's HuaHua.
And sorry, Stinty, I think is he a cat? Cat? Cat? Did you say?
Yeah?
Yeah, it's a cat.
Clip of the clip of re of Wren playing the President of the United States is just insane and so appropriate for like right now, I'll even play it real quick, right now, do you know who you're daily? He hits the button and blows it chunk out of the earth.
Anyways, it's dark, It's real dark, but I felt that spiritually. Miles, where can people find you as their working media you've been enjoying?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, find me pretty much everywhere they got at Symbols at Miles of Gray, find Jacket out of the basketball podcast Miles and Jacket, And you can also find me talking ninety dance on four to twenty Day Fiance. This one is just so stupid it this is on Blue Sky at coryat atad at a d dot com posted the Internet was a mistake, but sometimes the but sometimes it's the best thing ever. I think that's how
we all feel about the Internet. But this one is taking the musical someone just made and then flipped.
Let's take a listen.
I don't know who you are, I don't know what you want. If you let my daughter goym you, Donald, I will look for you, I will find you and I will cull you.
So it cuts on, but just stupid as we got too much time.
But sometimes you make the four works of art, don't. You can find me on Twitter at Jack Underscore O'Brien on Bluesky at Jack Obi the number one and first of all, just enjoying just how many other people feel about the Celtics the way that I do. Oh, Benjamin Solac tweeted, there simply is nothing that hits quite like a Celtic loss, and I'm just seeing that everywhere everywhere. So shout out to everybody. Shout out to the Celtics for bringing us all together like that, Yeah, Celtics are
this year's NBA's drake. I think, oh, I mean, we'll see they're gonna come back and win this series. But you know what I'm saying like that, like a lot of peop are.
Like, yeah, yeah, it's just the hater the hateration coming bringing us all together in this eatery and then at Roast Malone tweeted, whoever came up with Lefty Lucy righty tity absolutely cranked it out of the park on that one, and I agree that's it's one of those.
Early means that has fucking invaded my brain. And you can find us on Twitter and Blue Sky at Daily Zeike Guy's read The Daily Zeitgeist on Instagram. You can go to the description of the episode wherever you're listening to it, and you can find the footnotes where we link off to the information that we talked about in today's episode. We also link off to a song that we think you might enjoy, Miles, is there a song that you think people might enjoy?
Yeah, Look, Doci, I still one of the greats that more people need to really embrace. Is one of the best MC's right now. One of our latest tracks is called Nosebleeds. That's what we're gonna go out on. It's the She's just fantastic. The production feels like peak Timberland, but like in twenty twenty five, it's just it's got it all Docy. Nose Bleeds go now listen. There we go, go listen, you must. The Daily is the production of iHeart Radio.
For more podcasts from my Heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio w ap Apple podcast or wherever you list your favorite shows. That's gonna do it for us this morning, back this afternoon to tell you what is trending, and we will talk to you all then. The Daily zeit geis executive produced by Catherine Long, co produced by Bee Wang, co produced by Victor Wright, co written by j M McNabb, edited and engineered by Justin Conner,