Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Aaron Rodgers's Achilles trendon for Aaron Rodgers, for New York Jets fans, you hate to see you hate to see it happened. You hate to see it.
But in the words of the great Joe nay Myth, I could care less about the team struggling.
And in the words of O. J. Simpson, did you see what his tweet? No, shout out to my friend Chris who always keeps me up to.
Date to say, shout out to my say shout out to my friends.
To my friend O. J. Simpson, who was on it is what it is? I don't know what that is? That a show and said nine to eleven is just a bad day for New York. This is a new low. Wow about Aaron Rodgers snapping his Achilles tendon on nine that's the new love. Yeah, a new love. Okay, Anyways, it's just an amazing sense of tact like he's Ojay Simpson's next act is finally the final act of his career, is like being the most tactless human being maybe that we've ever had.
I mean, I would say that he has about the appropriate amount of tact from.
Like the appropriate level is like you go into hiding in the woods.
Right, Oh yeah, well I guess it look with different styles, different styles.
For different styles, for different openly guilty murderers. Yeah, yeah, it is what it is. All right. Let's tell the people a couple of things that are trending, shall we. Miles So in Mexico in front of Congress, a journalist that word is being put in quotes by a lot of people came through. You know that. There was a lot of talk when the Pentagon whistleblowers came came in front of the US Congress and was like, yeah, we have a non human or non.
Non human bi biologics.
Uh. You know, people were like, we need extraordinary claims, require extraordinary proof, And this motherfucker came through and was like, voila, how how about that? We good here? Uh and unveiled glass like wooden boxes with glass tops with a thousand year old alien corpses in them, and was like there you go.
Any questions are we good here?
I said, Unfortunately, we are not, because this particular quote unquote journalist does have a history of pulling shit like this that didn't turn out to be true. He's specifically really a big fan of the alien mummy genre of discovery. He's done this bit, but has previously been associated with claims of quote alien discoveries that have later been debunked, including five mummies found in Peru in twenty seventeen that were later shown to be human children. Uh so, yeah,
it's classy. It is funny that he keeps coming back to the mummies. He's like, I get the feeling he was like a big fan of mummies as a child, like and is like this is oh, like you just can't't quit the mummy shit, you know, yeah.
And everyone's like, please, honey, quit the mummy shit. I don't know if I feel like I keep if I keep hitting that button, eventually it's gonna.
Ummies are so cool, Like don't you think people are going to be into them? There's also like he's making claims about like DNA that was recovered from these alien mummies fossils I think they're being called, which I don't know. Can you pull DNA from fossils? I thought I thought you needed to get like the mosquitoes that bit those things a long time ago and then get preserved in amber. According to Jurassic Park the only science book I've ever read.
Uh yeah, I don't know any other way. It has to be in Mosquito, but Mosquito.
Mosquito butt. It's got to be mosquito butt, and it's got to be inside amber.
And it's got to be in Costa Rica or else it's not.
And that uh that like, you can't even get usable DNA from those so.
I don't know, we've learned you can't. You can't even get usable DNA from a subway tunics.
That's right.
Okay, so the bar is pretty fucking hot.
But it is wild. It's worth looking at the pictures of this unveiling because very very dramatic stuff happening.
It is I forget. I think it was Sean O'Connor on Twitter. It's just like screencap the alien goes this isn't an alien. I follow like eleven dudes that look like this on Instagram. I don't even know what that means, but I like it.
By the way, Miles, you are in the you're in the dark here to quote, uh literally no, yeah, character from Scent of a Woman, thank you because you're your powers out?
So I just yeah, my power went out? Yeah, really cool. Ending to tomorrow's episode. Yeah, when I fucking literally get vanished from the Earth with my power going out, we'll see how long it lasts. But anyway, you have to you have to fucking humiliate me, just.
Letting people know this guy doesn't even have power. You believe it that you're trying to claim he's a podcast or you don't even have power, getting you didn't even have power I am talking about. I'm trying to testify to what a professional you are. You neither rain I'm using a hot nor sleet yeah or snow. Yeah, all right. NASA is talking about them finding possible signs of actual
life on a distant planet. This is the more boring version of you know what was what that journalist was try what was going for down in Mexico.
Because you're like, what, it's a pictures of alien you guys got pictures of fun you guys.
The James Webbin like super you were like enhance, enhanced, enhance, and then there was an alien down there just like handing you with a finger.
Oh it's a superboy, I think.
But it's so they found a planet a mirror one hundred and twenty light years away. So they found a planet that around the nineteen hundreds early nineteen hundreds, you know, because that's how long it has taken the light from that planet to reach our telescopes. That it contains rare water like a This is the thing that I hadn't heard outside of the context of this story. They keep
talking about a water ocean, which I get. I guess you do need to specify because there's probably oceans of mercury and other weird shit on other planets.
But oh, right, right right. I thought it was like redundant, like a Philly you have water, which oh.
Yeah, which is neither water. But yeah, this is this planet is much bigger than Earth, nine times the mass of Earth, with a hydrogen rich atmosphere and a wood ocean covered surface. It's got a wooteration covered surface. Let's go, And that is what NASA said. They said, let's go. They think it could how's life because it could absolutely house life because it seemingly contains a dimethyl sulfide, which is a molecule that on Earth is only produced by life.
The the dimethyl sulfide has yet to be confirmed, but they they're seeing. They're saying that at place over there looks awfully dimethyl sulfide. D got that, DM got that DMS vibes. The planet is giving DMS vibes, sir. The planet is called K two eighteen B. I'm sure. I'm guessing we'll come up with a better name for that. And they're not too distant future.
Is it from New York? Is otherwise K two eighteen.
Sorry, but as Superducer, so Superducer Brian, our space expert and our resident space alien curmudgeon. Whenever I say they found life, he's like, Jack, send me the link, Jack, you're going jacket. So this time he said, Okay, So dimethyl sulfide is farts, and that is kind of what one of the things they made the James Webb Telescope for was to scam for farts. So we've got we've got a confirmation on farts. Let's go to quote, yeah, hey, to quote NASA con confirmation on farts. Let's go and
then like, go, not a watereration. We got a confirmation on farts. Let's go. I'm having a mentee big.
You know, but you know what they say, you know, like you can't have farts without butts, miles, So there's butts.
For the first thing I learned in intro to philosophy, and it's why I major to thank you.
That teacher blew your mind.
Like those like those space yeeks were blowing out farts, so algae farts. We might have algae farts ways away. Like one of the things in the article was like, but d MS is like mainly made by algae, so chances are like it's just like there aren't is an intelligent life there. It's like, how do you know that it's not both we got algae, we got intelligent life.
I mean, if you it could be intelligent out and not.
Counting the clowns on Washington, you know those are intelligent LIFs. He's back, folks. Let's take a quick break and we'll come back, like the Drew Barrymore show. We'll be right back.
And we're back.
And just just when you thought Drew Barrymore couldn't create any more terrible publicity with her show, you know so she if you haven't been listening, she relaunched her show without her striking writers. Now they are like getting very guest stop oie guestoppish up in her show with audience members. They threw two audience members out for wearing w GA pins that they were given on the way in by
people who were picketing. They also claimed that they the people who were thrown out were claimed that they were verbally assaulted by the crew of the Drew Barrymore Show.
If true, what is that? What is that like, Hey, you fucking loser, labor pinkle commy motherfuck like or are they just like, hey, piece of shit, get out of here. We don't like that, Drew don't like that.
I have noticed a trend in Hollywood where like, if there's like a really nice famous person like they are, they tend to be surrounded by people who are like, well, I've got to make up for that to protect them, and you know, well, right, literal sharks. They just travel with a pack of literal sharks. So I don't know, I'm not saying that's true of Drew Barrymore. She might be mean in reality when she's off air, who knows,
but uh yeah. The show spokesperson later confirmed the story, claiming it was due to heightened security concerns, and they said they're in the process of reaching out to the affected audience members to offer them new tickets. Cool, I'm sure they really want to go back.
What is heightened security concerns? How does someone having a pin connect with this idea that they were heightened security concerns that these people were going to fucking stab her.
You don't know what they can do with that pen.
That's true, that's true. They could have a very special set of skills.
Very particular set of skills. Uh. Yeah. The next day with a un yeah, the next day there was a story that audience members bags were being searched and WGA button's confiscated. So you don't even have to like be wearing it, You just have to like have it on your person and they will take that.
This is fucking peak weirdo loser behavior. Drew Barrymore show, Like, seriously, you I thought you were I thought you were taking this h decision with the utmost humility and understanding what would come with it, and now you're like suppress anything that makes me realize I'm on the completely wrong side of this shit.
We don't want your to see any w GA pins because she's gonna feel bad. Uh, So let's just keep them out.
Do you see? How do you see how she leaves the studio? No, she wears like one of those like helmets that they put on hawks so they can't and they just rush her straight out. They can't even have her catching her gaze blind people. She's fucking over. Yeah, I mean, I say they need to. Everyone needs to spam the fuck out of the ticket site because it's very easy to search for how to give like these. You don't buy tickets, they give because, by.
The way, I'm going to being a studio audience member for one of these shows sucks. It's awful.
You're there for a lot longer than you think you need to be, And why not just get a bunch of people that are in there and like, just disrupt the fucking taping.
It's a great question.
Have plants in there every consistently, and then the second she starts talking, yo, support the w and then like you kind of have enough people that like every five minutes someone speaks up and like, shit, now we gotta throw this fucker out too.
Fuckers. I don't know, I'm out of the walls, popping on of.
The fucking walls and having a w GA shot on me.
There's some good, uh, there's some good picket signs out in front of of the Drew Berrymore show, there's a lot of a lot of good picketing going on. Uh One of the pickets signs said do you like breaking strikes and has a picture of ghost face, which is.
From scream, coming from coming.
From people think talking about kicks. Uh No, no, ghost face from scream that That one's a lot. That one's a lot. I like it, but it does seem like you're threatening to murder Drew Barrymore.
Yeah, it's not that cool.
No, I think, can somebody give me one with penis breath in there? I feel like we we could get uh me t the the line that made us all fall in love with Drew Barrymore where she calls Elliott penis breath.
I believe, Yeah, what what? What rampant violent homophobia coming out of such.
A truly, but that is like that line fucking blew my mind. It was one of the first insults I ever heard, and I was like, what.
Anybody else?
And she's a kid. Anyways, Let's see what else is trending, Miles. I do love your idea. Spanish shadow of the ticket sites, let's go, let's go such.
A vulnerance Yeah, wa Erosian, let's go. It's such a vulnerability in like trying to do these things where you need an audience, but you really have no way to select who those people are, so you really.
Just kick Larry. They are desperate for you to come to those tapings.
Oh yeah, but tourists. I mean, there's no better thing for like a tourist to do, like when you go to a big city, like when you think about like back at Television City on Fairfax where the CBS tudios and people are just like dying in the sun because they want to see Drew Carrey on the prices right, like go ahead.
I used to go to the Craig Kilbourne. I used to line up. I went to two tapings of the Craig Kilbourne Show. Extremely high and not fun. Not not fun. Yeah, it's a very very weird experience. Anyways, what else is trending? More people calling for Biden not to run. Washington Post is David Ignacious, a columnist who I'm not familiar with, but see it seems like a big deal. People are treating it like a big deal, saying calling on both this is the quote. But I don't think Biden and
Vice President Harris should run for reelection. It's painful to say that. Give him my admiration for much of what they've accomplished. He's very like gentle and kind, but like it's truly it seems like he's being like, hey, man, you did it. You did a great job. Don't don't fuck this one on.
Are you seeing the polls though, just like what you're saying, Like the polls are like your own are your own voters are like come on, yeah, him, take a break. We don't want to see him die on the Walmart floor.
But he still has the best chance of beating Trump according to Vegas, So who the fuck knows?
Yeah, no, he's he's got a lead over uh over Trump. But but like that's what's so weird about the math, like the logic of the DNS. He's like, but but he's doing better than Trump. It's like I'd posit that a lot of people could pull better than Trump if you're if you do the whole put the weight of the machine behind it.
Hey, political strategists are surprisingly bad at their jobs for like that being their whole job. Like it can't tell you shit usually when it comes to pulling.
Yeah, I mean you know, ignacious is like whatever, like not the most forward thinking guy, Like he's definitely he's like loved the invasion of Iraq and like, oh loves the CIA, so like so.
Many of them did, show, so many of them did. It's really crazy.
But even that kind of guy, a CIA boot liquor is like, I don't know, Byron.
Seems bad, seems like he's all Joe Scarborough was like every Democrat off air admits he's too old to run. But y'all gotta get your ship together and figure out who it's gonna be if it's not gonna be Biden.
So bad, Like they're just they don't realize how much how much power and appeal there is in a progressive platform, and like they just can't fucking dare to look that way at all, to the point where they're like, I don't know, man, just fucking get the mummy out and the mummy out one.
Yeah, that's people love mummies. That's sweet. Said it once on this show. We'll say it again. People love fucking mummies.
Is that guy? This is that guy also running the.
Baby Aliens were mummies. I'm just saying, what if the president was a mummy, but if the mummy was alien, that's the ah, the pitch for the next Alien movie or the next Mummy movie.
Right.
Finally, Apple, a couple of things trending in the world of Apple. They announced iPhone fifteen yesterday, where the big news is you're gonna have to change your charger again. At least it's yeah, at least it's USBC. Like, so this is actually in response to EU legislation that was like everything needs to be USBC, just like stop fucking with people, stop changing like what the chargers are? Just everything USBC now. So they're doing that, which annoying but
like good in the long run probably. They also did a video about how all their products will be carbon neutral by twenty thirty and it's real, real corporate cream shit.
Real, it's it's it's a yeah, it's a green wash extrava again. Yeah with a high budget. Oh yeah, there's that presentation. I watched a little bit of it because I was curious to see, like because I haven't I haven't got an iPhone like five years, and I kind of do that thing where I'm like, nah, it does it seem different? In often the one I've got rolling out that mine gets like fucking hot when it charges I'm like, okay, maybe I can, maybe I can test.
Oh is that bad to get hot? When to charge his mind?
I mean like not warm, but like to the to the point Whe'm my gil, this shit is getting hot.
Grants and my underwear yeah.
Yeah, but yeah. But then like this, it's the look of it is truly like it feels like what the mainstream is is like an Apple presentation where it's like so manicured and like like the like image conscious about like how it's presenting itself. Like when you watch it, you're like, are these people like is there a gun pointed at them? Like off camera when they're like, You're going to love the new innovations of the Apple Watch series.
Nine to tell us more, here's blah blah blah on a random field and it's like cuts to someone being like, okay, I'm the design anyway. All that to say is there's there was a very weird scale.
I guess skit Octavia Spencer Octavius plays Mother Nature and Tim Cook is talking to Mother Nature like Mother Nature has kidnapped his children and is like going to murder them.
They are they are sore?
Did what you asked us? Like? Mother Nature is like a vengeful god.
That. Yeah, she's like she's dressed in all black and her vibe is like angry auntie, which that's not what I feel Mother Nature should represent. But it is weird. I don't that might just be their own guilt as like being such a like like bad with carbon emissions company, like manifesting in the fact that like they feel that they're about to get their fucking like have a.
Recond version of Nature is a sleep paralysis demon that comes and haunts them in the night as they're like trying to go to sleep. Tim Cook is like and menaced by Mother Nature.
He's it starts off where he's like, you don't I remember I didn't know what the fuck was going on. There's like this really weird comedic schedule. Chris, She's coming, She's coming there, like what, oh my god, and like they're prepping the thing and Tim Cook's like rehearsing lines like how is the weather when you keep like no, not that Tim. He's the worst fuck up.
Tim. Yeah, he gives himself so this is like classic. He like was overseeing this production and totally not taking into account that he is not an actor who can pull off any of his lines, but like because he's in charge, like nobody can tell him that. So it's it's a mess.
Somebody, somebody pull the plug on that guy.
And then it opens with her like looking out a window and they're like, we we did what you asked us too, Master, and and then she takes a slow walk around the conference table with a baseball bat in her hand, and uh, they're all scared. Now that's that's actually the untouchables. But that feels like the energy.
Breaks up, breaks a pool quebe in half and throws it on them, rid of the table and says, all right, last one I gets to join the.
Just a truly sane person's vision of nature and why we need to stop destroying the planet. Anyways, what a mess. But the products are going to be carbon neutral and who the fuck knows what that means?
Yeah, okay, they're like and as a company, we're going to be uh completely carbon neudy by twenty carby nouts. Okay, we'll see, we'll see. But yeah, like like this, when you look at all the materials used or like where where do it? Like? But does it mean are the products will use less energy? Like is that part of it? They're like, no, no, no, no, no no, We're just gonna put up a bunch of solar raising shit. Ye.
Anyways, thanks for the car carby Nuchos Apple. You guys killing it. What a company.
Someone in the discord is saying that like ment B and the Kazi Lives, so they're like, that's like Aussie slang.
Okay, Wow, about time that it's some Ausy slang went global because they they've had some good stuff.
For not here to fuck spiders hasn't taken off like the way I'd like it too.
When I say it, people, not here to fuck spider means.
You're not here to fuck around. What do you say? Yeah, we're not here to fuck spiders? Mate, it doesn't make it. I'm not here to fuck around.
Nothing that that makes any sense. I love it so much and trying to introduce that into casual conversation. Please please do uh please do try that at a preschool interview. See how it goes over.
I did, and having to double back and explain it to someone kind of I realized, Okay, it might not be the most efficient turn off.
Right, what's your problem? Kids? Fucking love spiders? Who I'm not on trial? Here, I'm all right. Well, that's gonna do it for us on this Wednesday, September thirteenth. We are back tomorrow with a who last episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine, don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye bye,