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From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central. It's America's only sorts for news. It's The Daily Joke with your host Daisy Lion.
Welcome to the Honey Daily Show. I'm Dannie l Nick. We've got so much to talk about. Tonight, Kamala Harris faces the mcflurry of questions, Donald Trump declares war on furniture and Ray Let's get right into it with another installment of Indecision twenty twenty four. We are just forty days away from the election, which means it's time to start working on that insurrection body. Both Kamala Harris and Donald
Trump gave campaign speeches on the economy today. Kamala laid out her priorities for the middle class, while Donald Trump promised to bring back North Carolina's manufacturing jobs and he wasn't dramatic about it at all.
All of your furniture makers are going to come back and come back bigger and stronger and better than ever before. They're mostly gone. They're all coming back. This is why people in countries want to kill me.
That's why people want to kill Trump. Does he think IKEA issued at fatwah on him. Fatois is my favorite ikea bookshop.
Now.
In her speech, Kamala was emphasizing her middle class roots, while in his speech, Trump was saying, nah ah, she never.
Worked at McDonald's. It was a fake story. It was a fake story. She said she worked at McDonald's and she didn't. It was a lie. She never worked at McDonald's. Over the hot French fries, I think I'm going to a McDonald's in two weeks.
Actually, did Trump.
Just talk himself into getting hungry? She never worked over the piping hot fries, so crispy and salty, each bite of perfect. We should go to McDonald's. Let's go to McDonald's.
Go so.
Trump's new conspiracy theory is that Kamala Harris never worked at McDonald's when she was young, which to him is basically stolen valor. How dare you disrespect our men women in uniform. Those people served with honor and with extra ketchup packets if you asked. And yes, it is ridiculous that Trump is asking to see Kamala's burger certificate. This isn't the kind of thing you would lie about. It's not like sex with a porn star while your wife
is pregnant. But look, I get why he's suspicious. If she had ever worked at any McDonald's between the years nineteen sixty and last week, he probably would have seen her. Or maybe this whole thing is just a ploy for him to get free food. You worked at McDonald's, prove it, make me seven big macs. But look, here's the thing. Trump and Kamala weren't supposed to be doing this stuff today. Originally there was another debate scheduled for tonight, and The
Daily Show would be broadcasting live. But there was no debate, and we are not. In fact, if you're watching this right now, I'm already at home in bed, watching videos about how bad it is to look at your phone in bed. And now it's looking more and more likely that the first Trump Paris debate was also the last, because while Kamala keeps saying she's down for a rematch, Trump wants no part of it.
The problem with another debate is that it's just too late. Voting has already started. It's too late to do another. I'd love to in many ways, but it's too late. The voting is cast.
I'm sorry, it's too late. I'd love to have my ass handed to me for another two hours, but there's just no time. There's no time, there's no time. I can't I mean, I can't blame the guy. People don't typically volunteer for a second beat down. Drake's not going to Kendrick like, hey, we should beef again. Send me some date, get it on the calendar. But then again, there's only forty days until the election. There is no time to lose, which is why Trump is working overtime
to make his final sales pitch. And it's not the one you think.
Hello everyone, I have something incredible to share today. We are announcing the launch of Trump Coins, a true symbol of American greatness. Each coin comes with a certificate of authenticity with my signature to ensure you have purchased a real Trump Coin. I've seen a lot of coins out there using my very beautiful face and very beautiful guy.
I'm only kidding, I'm only kidding. Apparently there are some lies even Trump can't stand by. But Trump is right. There are a lot of different trump coins floating around out there, and you don't want to be scammed by some grifter's fake coin. You want to be scammed by Donald Trump's fake coin. And that's why Trump's comes with the Certificate of Authenticity, which authentically certifies that you should not be in charge of your family's finances.
That idea.
Now, if he was just peddling this coin, I would understand, what with all the legal bills he has to pay for the fraud and the sexual assault and all the big max. But this is just the latest in a long line of John k He's been hawking all campaign season.
My popular demand, I'm doing a new series of Trump digital trading cards. These cards show me dancing and even beholding some bitcoins. The launch of World Liberty Financial. We're embracing the future with crypto. I'm proud to endorse and encourage you to get this bible. Hello to my fellow Pakrits. We have some very big news. My new book Save America published by Winning Team Publishing. We're going to remember
sneaker Con. That's the real deal. Each physical trading card has an authentic piece of my suit that I wore for the presidential debate. So they just came out with this T shirt which is really pretty spectacular and it's selling like hotcakes.
Yeah, so Trump is selling a lot of stuff. And keep in mind this is all in the middle of a campaign season, isn't me? Or does it seem like maybe his true passion is this Like healthcare, he only has a concept of a plan, bible hawking, he has a whole warehouse ready to go. In fact, Donald, why don't you just do this? And you know, forget about the whole presidency thing. Dickon wasn't good at Trump at helps you can sell a commemorative coin from when you
retired from politics. I'd buy that. Oh oh sorry, what was that?
Oh?
Trump just came out with a new product. Well let's see what it is.
Hello, it's your favorite President, Donald J. Trump. Over the years, you've bought my coins, my shoes, pieces of my suit and it may be wonder is there anything you won't buy? Introducing Trump Spunk. I'm the first president in American history to train his own swamp into tiny little bottles, very tiny, and pass them on to you. The American people look at that. That's my snakes us Is it that fantastic? Each vial is personally hand cranked by yours truly the
greatest American president? They say, my patriotics Floode is better than Lincoln's. I don't know the krem de la creme, I guess you could say, and now that cram can be yourse. You can use trump Spunk for anything, a charm on, a friendship bracelet, an incredible for your Easter hall, or the proposed to that special summer. You can add water and make your own Eric. I wouldn't recommend it, but you can. Every vial of Trump Spunk is guaranteed to be ninety percent of my Man Better. I don't
know where the rest came from. And for a limited time only, each vial of my Tadpole yogurt is only twenty nine ninety nine. Act now and get a limited edition capsule of the J six Juice, which was created while I was watching the Capitol Riots. So wonderful Trump Spunk. It's worth a shot limit to per customer. I'm not a machine.
Well that was gross. When we come back, Ray won't be.
Joining me on the show, so don't go away.
My guest Night is the singer songwriter whose debut album earned her a record breaking six BRIT Awards. Her new live concert album is called Live at Montro Jazz Festival. Please Welcome, Ray, Welcome to the show.
Thank you so much for having me.
I did a couple of style jumps just to get in the Vibesa main So from out.
Bress a couple a couple start jump star jumps.
Will you talk Jumping Jackson America?
Right, So I am now calling them star jumps for the rest of my life. That's so much better than jumping jack Break do everything better. It's just the way it is. Congratulations on all of your success. You just swept the brit Awards with a record six awards, including Best Album.
Thank you.
How did that?
How did that feel? What does that mean to you?
Oh?
Honestly, I think the night just got more and more blurry and more and more emotional as the night went on. I felt like by the last the album was the last one.
It was a video and I just it's all blurry. But I've watched that.
Yeah, and I got to bring my grandma on stage, which is the most beautiful moment.
Yeah. Yeah, she's everything to me.
Oh yeah, she was so proud of you.
She is. Yeah, Yeah, that's incredible.
The You know, Americans are completely obsessed with British artists. Charlie XCX, you Harry styles Adel Are you all impressed with Americans at all? You can be honest, be honest.
I don't know what to say, fact that we love Americans. Come on, go Americans.
We need to do more starjacks, star jucks. You come You mentioned your grandma. You come from a very musical family. Your sister is a singer, songwriter, your grandfather was a songwriter. You grew up singing in the church choir. How has all of that influenced you as a musician.
I don't know.
I think the thing with music is when it gets you, it really gets you, do you know what I mean? And I was so young when I just decided, like this was Plan A. There was no Plan B. I'm going to be a musician or die trying. So my entire life has just been that kind of you know, pursuit of music.
And I started as a songwriter.
It's kind of got my foot in the door, you know, and it's it's been, Yeah, it's been. It's not the simplest journey behind the scenes, you know what I mean? I know you hear, yeah, sure, but we made it so far, so good. I've got big dreams, big plans.
I'm heading there, so far, so good.
Did you started out as a songwriter? You wrote songs for Beyonce, for John Legend, for Kylie Minogue? How was it last year you put out independently your solo album. How how did that feel to do that and what was the music writing process like for you writing for yourself versus another artist?
Oh?
I do you know? It was such a liberating thing.
And you know, I've been in a record label for quite a while and it was a tricky time. And for me, albums and everything, you know, I do think everything's becoming a lot shorter now. All of our attention spans, including myself, is just getting short and shorter. But for me, albums are just essential and important and will never die.
And I really believe in the album.
So getting to make my own one was a really beautiful experience. And then on top of that, getting to be recognized and listened to. But that it's just opened so many doors. It's just blown my mind. A lot of people thought that I would never have success as an artist. I mean, so it's just also so vindicating to be able to prove to myself that they were just all chatting rubbish. Yeah, you have any laugh things.
One of the things that I appreciate so much about your music and that I think sets you apart from so many other artists is the way that you juxtapose these big, sort of joyful, big band jazzy music along with lyrics that are really raw and vulnerable and about very serious issues. You talk about body dysmorphia, you talk about mental health, sexual assault. How do you even begin building music around those lyrics?
Well, you know, I do think. I think music is medicine. I will say that. I think I think like even sitting here and talking to about these sort of heavier subjects, I get nervous. I don't really know how to address it or what to say. And I think music is a safe space to kind of be raw and honest. And for me, that's my safe place. It's my therapy.
And yeah, you know, I think there's a lot of us have really broken and a lot of us are hurting, and a lot of us are dealing with things we don't know exactly how to speak about or express even with the people that we love, and I think music is a safe space to do that, to find healing or talk about it or just I don't know, process it, So that was really important to me as an independent artist. I just wanted to be honest about those things you're quiet about.
You know, you've talked a lot about imposture, syndrome experiencing that. Is that something that you still think about even with this amount of success that you've reached.
Oh yeah, I just feel yeah, do you know what?
I'm just more of a like, you know, just I'm quite chatty and just like hang out, do you know what I mean? And then you know, you get put in these kind of fancy environments like the met Gala, for instance, I was just like, what am.
I doing here? You know?
So I guess you do kind of feel like that, And I don't necessarily think I feel like that's a bad thing. I think the kind of music I want to continue to create, the person I always want to be is someone who's just like, you know what I mean?
Normal?
I don't know, And I'm not going to be fancy the way I suck at being fancy, even though this dresses is very fancy.
But I mean, you got it your song genesis, and within that you explore all of these different topics. You talk a lot about the dangers of social media, mental health, anxiety. You explore all these weighty topics. What was so important to you about covering all of those themes in this one song.
Well, I don't know, Like I was kind of saying before, I feel like it's easy to kind of brush over and gloss over the truth and for us to all be you know, we're.
All kind of stuck in these algorithms and it's all like.
Self love, self love and everything's and everything's fine, and say, oh, and it's just not the reality at all. I've spent like five minutes on social media, my head starts to spin out. I've actually had to come off it completely. I made them change my past, where as I can't even look in. So someone hands me my phone. It's like, you've got four minutes, and I'm like, great, and I need that, you know what I mean, because it's really bad for me and I can't be the only one
who feels that way. That's brilliant. So yeah, I wanted to make a song. It's a seven minute long song. I'm sorry, I'm only doing the really sad parts actually on here.
That works for us.
We're very sad, So it's going to be quite depressing. You know, it starts sad, it gets quite angry, and then it goes lying.
I don't know.
It's just art music and it's honest. It was tough to write. It's very raw. But I'm proud of it, you know, and that's what matters most. I think, Yeah, you have a lot to be proud of, so you should be very proud of yourself.
And we are proud to have you here at this show. So thank you so much for coming on Live at Manto Jazz Festival is available now. That's our show for tonight. But before we go this election season, we are working with headcount to make sure that you and your friends are good to vote. Had to vote vote vote dot com to make sure that you're ready to vote this November. Now here it is your moment of zen. But what about Kamalos specifics.
People like to have a connection to whoever is Ronnie fag is that they share their experience, that they understand their lives, and I think that's what she is establishing.
Bite a second, she actually said her policy is a connection joining us Now. Florida Congresswoman Anna Paulina Alona Congressman, great to see you tonight.
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