This Week's Top Stories | The FBI Raids Trumps Mar-a-Lago Home

after the FBI conducted a wide ranging search. This may be the most politically explosive raid ever undertaken by the FBI, something that has not happened before in American history. So just check that in for just a second. It doesn't get any more significant than this. Not just aggressive, this is unprecedented, absolutely unprecedented, unbelievable, I mean stunning. Oh my god, the FBI raided Donald Trump's house in mar Logo. The FBI people raided a former president's house. This is huge.

This is bigger than when the FEDS investigated Bill Clinton for doing mouth stuff with that saxophone. And by the way, by the way, this raid, just so you know, has nothing to do with January six, or tax fraud or giving the White House plumber PTSD. No, apparently, apparently this investigation is about Trump taking classified documents from the White House. And and honestly, you know, I'm amazed that Trump has time for all of this crime back at any moment.

At any moment, Trump's gotta crime that he's covering up. He's gotta crime that he's doing. Now, he's gonna crime that he's plotting for the future. He's like the Steve Harvey, but of crimes. You know, every day, I'm like, does he have the same hours in the day of meet he gets so much done? Not if you'll remember, if you remember earlier this year, the Feds already had to go down tomorrow Lago and take back fifteen boxes of

documents that Trump wasn't supposed to have. But apparently they think there's more hidden on the property, all right, And I believe that. I believe that too. I mean, like, Trump's not gonna keep records in a filing cabinet like a normal person. There's the same dude who buried his ex wife on a golf course. I mean, think about that. And yes, it is totally unprecedented for the FBI to raid the home of a former president. That's true. That

has never happened in American history. But don't forget Donald Trump has also never happened in American history. Everything is an anomaly with this man. I mean, like, why do you think a book from one of his staffers comes out every single week? Because every single person he interacts with is like, yo, have I got a story for you? I wouldn't it be weird if this is the thing that takes Trump down? We thought it would be something like conspiracy or bribery or blackmail. But no, Trump's got

busted for taking work home with him. What a nerd? Now, obviously, President Trump recognizes the gravity of the situation, which is why he has refrained from comments while the legal process is now. I'm joking with you, Come on. The guy released a statement immediately immediately he read, these are dark times for our nation as my beautiful home Maralago in Bomb Beach, Florida is currently under sage rated and I keep by by a large group of the agents. They

even broke into my safe. What's the difference between this and water game? What's the difference? I love that even while he's complaining, he slips in that the thing is beautiful. How could they do this to my beautiful Also, also, this is completely different from Watergates, all right. For one thing, the guy's breaking into Watergate didn't need to clean old

ketchup stains off the documents. But the other big thing, the other big difference is that the raid was legal, all right, was approved by a federal judge, approved by the head of the FBI, who, by the way, was appointed by Donald Trump himself after he got rid of like seventeen other heads of the FBI because they didn't want to do primes of Donald Trump. So now the big mystery is what did the FBI find. Well, according to Donald Trump's third favorite son, the only thing the

FBI took was his heart. What could they possibly think existed inside a moral lago in a box that was taken from the White House that that was so damaging that the FBI director and the Attorney General of the United States would would have to raid a former president's residence, uh and grab everything out of there. I don't know. They'll probably find a note for me telling him how proud I am of him and what a great job

he was doing as president. They might find some pictures of my kids, maybe some nice you know, headlines, maybe a nice go from you, Sean. Oh, Eric, you silly, silly man. Did daddy tell you that's where your let us to him? Go hit in a way somewhere safe. They're just too important to show anybody or acknowledge it anywhere. Eric, That's why I locked them up right next to my

wedding ring. That's what I do now. Aside from the boxes that they took, the FBI also looked inside Trump's safe, which is very dramatic, like because apparently they had to break into it, all right, So now you're like, how do they do it? Did they blow it open or did they just correctly guess the cold or honestly, I how this a prized I would actually be surprised if they found White House documents in Trump's safe, because the

safe is where you keep your most prized possessions. Yeah, so in my head, searching through Trump's safe would probably go a lot more like this. All right, guys, let's see what we have in here. Him o, my god, the entire safe is just filled with mac rib after mac reb. This is this is the stacked on top of each other. This is I don't even understand. It's an unventilated safe. Who would do this? Wait? Wait, wait, hold on, there there's a secret panel in the bottom.

I think we found it. We just found another mac reb boys, another MACWB. Now you might be wondering, You might be wondering. Isn't this an extremely explosive situation for the United States? Yes, it is. It is. You don't want to let a former president get away with crimes, right because nobody in America is above the law except corporateations, enriched people, and police and celebrities sometimes, but aside from them,

nobody is above the law. But at the same time, even the perception that the Justice Department is being used to go after your political opponents, that could erode people's trust in governments. So it's a really tricky situation. And the only thing we can do is wait and see how the investigation unfolds. Oh, if your Fox News, you can just freak out right now. This is an abomination, this is it's probably the worst day in the history

of the FBI. This is a wake up call for those in Congress to be able to use the tools at their disposal to defund the FBI. Dismantle the FBI in two a thousand bits, Representative Marjorie Taylor Green simply tweeting, defund the FBI. If this is what they're able to do to the former president of the United States, think about what they could do to you, to anybody in America. The real target of this investigation isn't Trump. The real target of this investigation is you. Do we have a

dual justice system in America? Is there equal justice under the law? I am deathly afraid for Donald Trump. I would not put assassination behind these people. We're entering a basically a Venezuelan Zimbabwean East German style Banana Republican which the law doesn't matter. This is some third world bullshit right here. Let me say it again, third world bullshit all right. First of all, as someone from the third world, maybe leave us out of your ship for once. Huh?

How about that? That's a world bullshit right here. Here's a stup. Every time every time Americans wants to call something in America that it is that's corrupted, all of a sudden, they're like, oh, it's a third world bullshit. Ma, man, At what point do you realize that it's happening here. It's you. It's you. Bad things only happen in other countries when it's he's still happening in other country. In fact, when something happened in the actual third world. Yeah, these

days America has gotten so bad. People in Africa like, are you kidding me? This is just like America's tending into America. What are we doing here? What are we doing? But I do get what super Karen is saying. If the FBI, if the FBI is going to go off the Trump for stealing classified documents from the White House, then what's to stop them from going off to you

when you steal classified documents from the White House. It's not the country we want to live in where anyone can be investigated just for the crime of doing crimes. And I don't think so. I don't think so, And you know not. All of this just shows you. It was just like you just got a moment to save. Is how amazing how quickly mega world turns on law enforcements and America as a whole, whatever it suits them, whatever things go against them. Huh, All of a sudden.

Marjorie Taylor Green posting a photo of an upside down American flag after this rate happened. Yeah, well, I thought respecting the flag was the most important thing in the world. Colin Kaepernick is probably kneeling in his grave right now. All of these people complaining what happened to you? If you don't like what's happening in America, why don't you just leave? What happened to that? Huh? And all all of these all of these years, what has it been

two years now of people saying, defund the police. It's like the N word for law enforcement. Yes, but let the FBI take two boxes from marrow log, and all of a sudden, these same people are like, check that thin blue line and shove it up your ass. Day fund the FBI, day fund the cops, same people, same people. Where's more enforcement? Now? You know what we need to start for conservatives. We need to start a like a

game show called Who's Woken Out? That's what we should call. Yeah, it's like bringing our first contest to Sean Hannity who says, now, there are two justice systems in America. It's not fair. Oh, Who's woken now? Sean? You just want yourself an row pick? Congratulations, brother, Look, we don't know. We don't know what this raid will reveal. We don't even know if Donald Trump has actually done

anything wrong. But what it has exposed is that this whole mega crowd, they're only pro law enforcement, the only pro law enforcement when the law is not enforcing them. First up, Domino's Pizza has announced that it is closing the lost of its restaurants in Italy. And yes, yes,

they had Dominoes in Italy. Italy has drawn people too, you know, if you ask me them going out of business in Italy was actually the best thing that could have happened to them, because think about it, they came to the land of pizza and then they injected cheese into the crust. Are They're lucky they didn't get the death penalty here? You know, those are challenges, like Mom, what have you done to do the pizza? How can

you do this? Meanwhile, in international news, when firefighters have successfully extinguished the largest fire in Cuba's history, which burns for five days after lightning struck an oil depot that generates powerful basically the entire country. Yeah, and honestly, I was just surprised to learn that America knows how to make lightning now oh and then h in tech News.

In tech News, WhatsApp, the world's largest messaging app, has announced that is launching a new privacy feature that will allow users to leave group chats without everyone in the group knowing yeah, which is a much better system than the one before there because before this you have to text everyone in the group that you were going out for a pack of cigarettes and they just never come back. And I know, I know, for most Americans, WhatsApp is like Celsius. You sort of know what it is, but

you don't use it. But for the rest of the world, this is huge news. You've gotta understand. Almost everyone in the world uses WhatsApp. The problem is, anyone can add anyone else to a group chat. You don't have to have consent from them. You may not even know these people. This morning, I spent an hour arguing with and forty two other Africans about where the cold stoves are better than wood barning stoves. But here's the thing. Here's the thing. I don't own a cold stove. I don't know the

would't burning stuff and watch the wall. I don't even know who anyone that is. I don't know, But I can't leave the group chap because every time I try what that notifies them and then ad where it's like we had to do back in that chap, we saw your left up. Something must have happened. So as I was saying, if they would bend their super no, I'm just gonna creep out, you gonna slowly creep out, just

disappear from the group. All right, Let's move on to the story that is still rocking these here United States, and it's about Donald jam making me crazy. Trump, America's wildest former presidents, is being hit with multiple criminal investigations for no reason except for all the crimes he probably committed. So try and keep up with all the latest persecutions. It's time for a brand new segment we call America's Most tremendously Wanted. All right, let's start in New York States,

which is currently investigating Trump's businesses for tax fraud. Yeah, because apparently when he was trying to get loans from the bank, he was all like, I'm bailing out of control. But then when he was reporting his taxes to the I R. S. Suddenly he was like, hey, I ain't got no money. Huh. And as part of this investigation. The New York Attorney General has already questioned Trump's beloved children and also Eric. But today, today it was the Donald's turn to go on the oath. And I'll give

credit to the man. You know, he could have bitched out, but no, he stood tall and he walked into that interrogation room and then bitched out. Former President Donald Trump says he has invoked his Fifth Amendment right against self incrimination, refusing to answer any questions in his deposition before New York Attorney General Leticia James. In a statement, Trump says he had no choice because he and his family are the targets of what he called an unfounded, politically motivated

witch hunt. Trump was set to testify under oath about his business practices, but faced with those questions, He's decided not to talk. What Trump decided not to talk? No, I mean, now we know something shade he's going on, right, because when has Donald Trump ever refused to talk. We can't get the man to stop talking. Donald Trump not talking. He's like Titus of taking the bus. That's not a thing. I didn't even know this guy was capable of not talking.

He must have been shocked when he found out that not speaking was something that was allowed. Does mean, like you mean, this thing doesn't have to be moving twenty four seven. That's amazing. I could just close my mouth and keep it close and everything where they're fine, so fine, Such a beautiful idea. Total silence, more silence than anyone in the history of silence. And here I go, folks, silence. You're not hearing a thing. Wonderful silence. It's so quiet.

You can't hear anything. Nobody's ever been this quiet, so quiet. Now. A lot of people, a lot of people, a lot of people believe that when you plead the fifth it means that you're guilty. But no, Look, I don't believe that, all right, I know people do, but I don't believe that. You might just not want to incriminate yourself, But I get it. There are some people who truly believe that if you plead the fifth you are guilty. And one of those people is Donald J. Trump taking the fifth.

I think it's disgraceful. Fifth Amendment, fifth Amendment, fifth amendment, horrible, horrible, the mob takes a fifth. If you're innocent, why are you're taking the Fifth Amendment? Yes, Donald, if you're innocent. Why are you taking the fifth Amendment? Why are you taking the fifth Amendment? It's really amazing how of all of Trump's enemies, his worst enemy is just him from the past. Yeah, that that guy's relentless. Present day Trump is probably like, why won't this guy just shut up?

It's so easy, just watch quiet, totally silent, not as ound. So when anyone else please the fifth Trump says, it proves that they were criminals. But now now that Trump is in the hot seat, suddenly he sees it in a different way, you know. And maybe maybe it's because his lawyers explained it to him in a way that he would understand, and like, c sir, it's like signing an NDA, but with yourself, you know. Oh so I'm

the porn star. But it turns out, it turns out New York's investigation might be the least of Trump's worries because you remember this, two days ago, right, the FBI raided Trump's house to look for classified documents that he illegally took from the White House. And remember remember this, We do not know what those documents are, all right. They could be anything. They could be nuclear codes, they

could be battle plans, or or Ivanka's job description. Yeah, that was so top secret even she didn't know what it was. Or even worse, he could have taken the instructions to the White House TV remote. And now Joe Biden has no idea how to change the channel? Is that? Come on, man, I just want to watch Happy Days? Come on, man, change the channel please. And I know I know some of you are wondering right now. Some of you are thinking, Trevor is a former president keeping

documents that they have already had in their position? Is that that's serious of a crime, you know? I mean Trump didn't look at the documents when he was president, so you think he's looking at them now. And I kind of agree with you, probably honest I didn't think it was that serious of a matta, But my opinion doesn't count. The reason this is the way it is is because there was once an American president who believed that this crime was so serious he increased the penalty

from one year to five years in prison. Who was that, President? Donald? Just look at him now, Trump. Trump's removal of documents might violate at twenty eighteen acts that he himself signed into law increasing the penalty for improper handling of documents to five years in prison. Trump signed the law after he spent years accusing Hillary Clinton of illegally storing class by documents on a private email server. Looks like he did it again. Oh I love this. How can you not?

After spending years saying lock her up, Donald Trump signed the law that might get him locked up instead. This guy is basically a real life widely coyote. Yeah, he leaves traps for all these enemies, but somehow he's the one who keeps on getting switched on the road. It's just him every single time. So thanks to Trump, this crime is a big deal, which is why the red hat brigade has come out in full force to defend him, and they're throwing everything at the wall. Everything the Biden

administration is just out to get Trump. Oh the judge who approved the raiders antire Trump. The mishandling the class of our documents isn't a big deal unless you Hillary Clinton. But today today's really interesting. They seem to be coalescing around a new talking points and it's that the FBI wasn't at mar Alago to take evidence. They were there to plant evidence. Donald Trump, writing on truth Social Today

quote everyone was asked to leave the premises. They wanted to be left alone without any witnesses to see what they were doing taking or hopefully not planting. Quite honestly, I'm concerned that they may have planted something. You know, at this point, who knows doctor evidence? We know they plant evidence. Do I know that the boxes of material they took from our lago that they won't put things in those boxes to entrap him? How do we know? Lawyers said they brought in backpacks? What what was in

those backpacks was? Did they bring those in to fill them up or did they have something in there? Yeah? What was your known backpacks? Trump World? Everyone's doing this. They're trying to get ahead of everything, right, They're trying to get ahead of everyone hearing what the FBI found in this house by basically suggesting that whatever it is,

they put it there themselves. Yeah, the FBI is gonna say they found all these secret documents and a bunch of pictures of Brad Pitt with my face glued on it so it looks like my face it's kissing Brad Pitt's face. But that's all Blandet, folks, is not real. This is a classic move. We've seen this before, right, Yeah, at some point every kid has tried to pull this move with their parents when they're about to get busted.

Its like, before you search my room for we you should just know that there have been like a lot of burglars breaking into people's houses and putting half smoke joints inside old sneakers so I can find something that's probably them. What is amazing to me is how totally united every single conservative has been in defending Trump when we still have no idea what the FBI found at Mara Lago. No one, no conservative being like, well wait,

let's let's wait and see. Actually, I think Senator Scott said that the rest of them, they're just like I know, I do know this. I haven't seen one person on Fox who's even open to the idea that Trump may have done something wrong, or even one. It feels like it's someone at Fox even suggested that Trump might be wrong. A trapdoor would open, Yeah, and they just fall into a pit of pronouns. Ah ah they them, he me,

I don't get it, I don't get it. So in forty eight hours, conservatives have decided the FBI is corrupt. Trump is being framed, and the only crime he could be guilty of is looking so damn good in that suit. As for the rest of us, we're just gonna have to wait and see how the story unfolds. First up some international news, New Zealand maybe getting a new name. Yes, yeah, Maori politicians have launched a campaign to restore one of

the country's original names, altar Roa. Right. Yeah, and I think we can all be honest, Like they can't put a lot of thought into naming it New Zealand in the first place. Yeah, like the colonizes was so lad this is New Zealand. There's New England, New York, zero effort. There's like Pete Davidson Colling is next girl for a new Kim Terrible. It's not gonna work. Meanwhile, in health news, officials in New York say that hundreds of people in the States may be infected with polio because so many

people are unvaccinated. Yeah, so I guess New York is back back in the nineteen fifties. And you know, I'll be honest with you, I don't care anymore. Yeah, I don't polio. You want to come for me? Come, You're gonna have to fight for space in my body with COVID and monkey pots, just going on, just going at it, just go out and hard oh and in uh in politics,

in politics. According to a new book about the Trump White House, President Trump complained that his national security team wasn't loyal enough to him, saying, quote, why can't you be like the German generals in World War Two? Yeah, that's right. Fox News was out there every day like these liberals are so over the top, always comparing Trump to Hitler. Meanwhile, Trump was going, why won't people treat me more like Hitler? Why not? Na? And it actually,

it actually got even more alarming than that. Later in the same meeting, he told his generals to find the arc of the government before Indiana Jones got his hands on it. I'm joking, but that's not even the real story. So this is the crazy part. After Trump went off about how his generals should be as loyal as Hitlers were, General Kelly's response to him was, you do know that they tried to kill Hitler three times and almost pulled

it off. And I don't know why, but I feel like I feel like that information didn't change Trump's opinion of the German generals like like knowing Trump he was probably like those losers trying to kill Hitler three times and they choked like a dog, like a dog couldn't get it done. You know who wasn't able to kill Hitler in the first try, Hitler. It's called leadership, people, leadership.

But anyway, let's move on to some of the begginning stories of the day, slotting off with President Joe Biden, who had himself one hell of a weekend. First of all, he finally tested negative again for COVID and was allowed to leave quarantine for the first time in eighteen days. Yeah, so he's back in as good as new or whatever he was when he went in. And in eighteen days

is a long time in quarantine. But I'm sure he'll get right back into the swing of things, you know, because being president is a lot like you know, riding a bike. Oh, Joe done, don't do it. So the good news for Biden is that he's out of quarantine, and even more good news for Biden is that he is now in the history books the historic vote in the Senate. Major major victory tonight for the Democrats and

for our planet. This morning, Democrats triumphant. Every member of my caucus is elated about what happened, because we've really, we've changed the world in a way that you rarely get an opportunity to do that, Passing a sweeping climate, healthcare, and economic package after twenty two straight hours of dusk to don work over the weekend, Vice President Kamala Harris casting the tie breaking vote for Democrats to pass the bill,

which post climate spending and billions and energy investments, also reducing crises of prescription drugs by letting Medicare negotiate directly with pharmaceutical companies, the major legislative victory for Democrats in Congress and for the Biden White House. Suddenly he is one of the most consequential legislative presidents since l VJ. In his first two years in office. Yeah, don't look now, people, but all of a sudden, Sleepy Joe has himself a

pretty fat stack of accomplishments. In just the past few weeks. He'll have done lower prescription drug prices, the biggest investment in green energy ever, health care for veterans, exposed to burn court investment, imputer computer ship production, and he kept the lead of el Kada while he was sunbathing. Think about it, He's insane. Do you realize what this means? If he keeps this up, his approval ratings gonna shoot all the way up to like, and he did all

of this with COVID. I've been right now. The White House doctors are trying to figure out how to give COVID back to the president. Again. Come on, guys, if we gren't even affected, maybe you'll end the one you crad And by the way, I know this is weird, but have you noticed that Joe Biden seems to be the most successful whenever he disappears. No, I know, I know it's weird, but like, like during the campaign, right, he went and he hid in the basement, and nobody's

showing for months, Everyone's where's Joe Biden? Where's Joe Biden? And then out of no waere they were like they announced that he was the president. Remember he even came out on election night. It was just like really, okay, yeah,

I guess me. Then now gas prices crazy, Congress, stuck, inflation wild, Joe Biden gets COVID, disappears into the basement again, and then when he comes out, they tell him that not only is he still the president, he is now one of the greatest presidents in the history of presidents. Gas prices were down, Congress is getting things done. The Choco taco is coming back from the dam. So I don't know what's in that basement or whatever it is, it's working. In fact, I want that basement to be

president basement Tory twenty four. And by the way, it's not like this bill was easy for Biden to get. Remember that because it's a right. The Democrats can't afford to lose a single vote. So first they spent a year convincing Joe Mansion to get on board, and he was like, look, I'll back your climate change stuff, but only if you let me squeeze baby seals to see if there's oil inside. And the Democrats were like sure, yeah, yeah,

whatever whatever. But then at the last minute they had to convince Kristen Cinema and she was like, okay, I'll sign on, but only if you let me squeeze hedge fund manager is to see if there's campaign donations inside. And I guess it worked. So let's move on. Because no matter what you think about Joe Biden's accomplishments, we can all agree that he stole the election? Yeah, it was a landslide victory with Donald Trump, but sneaky Joe Byron hecked into the matrix and turned all the voting

machines black. No one denies this, and on January six, a group of patriots tried to explain all of this to Mike Pence's neck, but instead of listening, the U. S. Government has been throwing them in jail. They've been locked away in those cold cells ever since, with only their fur hats to keep them warm. So over the weekend. Over the weekend, conservatives gathered in Texas all right to raise awareness for just how badly the January six riders

are being treated. And the way they did this was they held a very special tribute that is very moving and not at all hilarious. The insurrection fallout is front and center at Sea Pack, this year's most buzzed about booth. Is this a fake jail cell? What you're watching actually happened at Sea Pack. It features a convicted January six rioter doing performance are in a cage wearing an orange jumpsuit. Visitors were offered headsets so they could listen to interviews

with jail January six defendants. While watching the actor weep, Some viewers wept along with him. Others threw money into the cage. Georgia Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Green entered this out to pray with him. Okay, wait, wait great gait wait wait okay, just wait, help me understand, Help me understand the logic module retailer Green is praying for a fake prisoner. Well, there's a real thing. She's chance. She's like serious, Who is this lady? It's like, America, this is a person

who's actually part of running your country. She's in there morning with a fake praying for it. How does she function in the world. It's a fake person. She must have the hardest time at Broadway shows. They killed Hamilton's I mean, I guess in her defense, this actor in the lobby of the Spack Convention already commits it to the rule because apparently he spent hours in that jail cell weeping the whole time just weeping, which in a way is a powerful performance arc because isn't that what

conservatism has turned to in America? Right? It's just people in maga hats acting like they're victims. There's fewer white people now than they used to be. We still have all the power. Oh, by the way, the part that made me laugh the hardest that is how people were throwing money into the cave, like, well, what what is that? This is like the only way they know how to interact with arts is the same way they interact with strippers. You know. It's just like your freedom has been stolen

from you. Shake that to shake that. Now. You would think a story like this couldn't get any crazier, But truly the best part of the story is this actor who played the defendants was an actual rioters on January six, who reportedly avoided a prison sentence by snitching on the other rioters. Yeah. So, just so you understand, this dude is pretending to be a prisoner that he helped send to prison. Which doesn't you snitched on your federal rioters,

they go to jail, and now you're on the streets. Crimate. Man. I wish there was something I could have done. That's nothing preferred to jail. I wish there's something I could have done. This is wild. All right, let's move on to some major news out of the entertainment world. There's no denying that there are fought too many streaming services out there these days. People, it's just too much. There's Hulu, the Netflix, as you know, Prime Video, Apple TV Plus,

Disney Plus. It's getting out of hand. It's getting out of hand, especially when Paramount Plus gives you everything that you need in one place. You know this the Champions League as Rupo's drag Race, because the Daily Show, the South Park, the Star Trek, the Daily Show, Beavis and Buttet and of course the Daily Show. What else do you need? So, yes, there are way too many services, but luckily soon there's gonna be one less. Soon you'll get a two for one deal on streaming. HBO Max

and Discovery Plus will merge next next year. Subscribers will have various options between HBO scripted entertainment and Discoveries reality based programming. It comes as HBO Max struggles with performance and customer issues. The CEO of Warner brother says, Discovery Plus has better technology and we'll become the core of the new service. No, no, no, this is enough. How

many times people going to change his name? Huh? It was it was HBO Goal and then it was HBO Now on HBO Max like at this point, I feel like they're just missing with us. Next month, they're gonna be like, your name is HBO, bitch says what what so? Yeah, Warner Brothers, Discovery and HBO emerging everything into one giant company. I know that's gonna be weird, but I for one cannot wait to see how all of these biggest shows combine. Coming up on house Hunter's Westerns, Jerry is looking for

a bigger space in King's Landing for his growing family. Okay, first of all, sword Chair, what is this like, seven guys, Let's switch that. Let's just switch that whole thing off, you know. Let's put in a cute ottoman, knock down some of these walls. Yeah, switch out the blood with a fresh coat of paint. Yeah, we gotta do that. We gotta fix the Thermer staff that's way too hot,

way too hot. And also on the new HBO Discovery, stay tuned for the premiere of our new series ninety Days Succession to fundamentally alter the nature of the family On my wedding day, do you have any conception how God, I'm selfish, you are? I just want a green card. Let's kick things off with the ongoing saga of Donald JUDEO Christian Trump earlier this week was rudely interrupted by the FBI when he was trying to hold classify documents. And this a lot we don't know about this raid.

What did the FBI find? Why would Trump be keeping these documents in the first place. Have Trump's secretly been able to read this entire time? But now we may be getting a little more insight into why the FBI moved in on mar Lago tonight brand new reporting about what led the FBI to execute a search warrant Monday at Trump's Florida home. The Wall Street Journal reporting that the FEDS may have gotten a tip off from an insider.

After officials visited mar Lago back in June to ask about government documents possibly stored there, Someone familiar with the stored papers told investigators there may still be more classified documents at the private club. Trump World is now reportedly trying to figure out who flipped. According to Rolling Stone, Trump is worried that he may have a rat or multiple rats in his mist He's wondering if his fonds are tapped, or even if his bodies could be wearing

a wire. Oh no, one of Trump's friends could be wearing a wire. This is the worst possible scenario because now he's got to tell Rudy Giuliani and Steve Bannon to take their shirts off, just be like take it, you know what. On second thought, I'll just kill myself. And if this is actually true, I am going to be shocked. I cannot believe someone would betray Trump's trust like this without getting a book deal. First, you're leaving

money on the table. People pretty doing Also, by the way, before Maga World tears itself apart trying to figure out who's the rat, I think you should all consider the fact that Trump could be the league. Okay, no, because if there's one thing we've learned over the past seven years is that he's the king of snitching on himself. Before we know, he was bragging about it at the

Marlogo buffet. He's just like this chocolate cake. It's almost as unforgettable as the classified documentary I keep in my basement, but not a shingled person. Note it was the perfect crime. By the way, that's a real picture of him at the buffet. We didn't create that. There are many pictures of him at the buffet now if we had more time, we could get into how Trump has had such a tight hold on the Republican Party that they're willing to put him above the law. We could talk about with

Americ Gland. I'm sealing the search war will convinced Republicans that the search was justified. But we just don't have the time because while Trump is fighting off the FBI to former Trump officials are trying to dodge Iranian assassins. Turning to a story overseas, a member of Iran's elite Revolutionary Guard is charged in an alleged plot to murder

former National Security advisor John Bolton. Investigators say the alleged murder for higher plant began to take shape after this drone strike in Iran assassinated Tamperani in General Consumt Sulamani over two years ago. Iran found retaliation. The Justice Department is now charging sh Iran pur Safi, a member of Iran's Revolutionary Guard, with offering three hundred thousand dollars to murder Bolton. The FBI also alleges that poor Safi had a second job for one million dollars. The target of

that job, former Secretary of State, might Pompeio. Yeah, that's right. America assassinated Iran's top general, one of the country's most respected and feared men, and Iran responded by trying to kill John Bolton and Mike Pompeos. It's not the same level. It's like it's like if your wife slept with your best friend and you're like, oh, yeah, well I hooked up with the I T guy at your office. Okay.

You know. In some ways, it actually says something about how divided America is, yeah, that it has nobody as respected as sole Money was in Iran. It feels like if anyone got assassinated in America, half the country would be like, hell, yeah, thank you Iran. And by the way, just as insult. Thousand dollars for Balton but a million

for Pompeo. Yeah, that's a big difference in price. I almost I almost feel bad for John Bolton because I don't know what's worse being on an assassin's hit list, for having the assassin find you and the assassin jumping out like John Bolton sag, I'm looking for a more important person to kill. Do you know what I could find him? Yes, yes, point me in the right direction. Also, by the way, if Iran was willing to pay a million dollars to kill Trump's secretary of State, they should

have just asked Trump to do it. I mean, he was gonna get his vice president killed for free. Come on, people, think about it, think about it. No, but for real, I do feel bad for John Bolton. I mean, yes, he's always trying to bomb every other country. Yes he brags about overthrowing governments, but being hunted by the Iranians can't be fun. I mean, it definitely explains why he's wearing that stupid fake mustache the whole time. It's real.

Oh sorry, my bad. Now. Now, if we had more time, we could talk about how America sees nothing wrong with assassinating foreign officials whenever they like, but ax surprise, where other countries want to get revenge. You should have turned the other cheek. But we just don't have the time. Goddamn it. Because while Iran is trying to get rout of people, Japan is trying to figure out how to add people to its population. The only problem is who

they put in charge of that. Japan has replaced the female minister in charge of reversing the country's falling birthrate with a man who has never had children. Massanabu Ogura said he gained an understanding of the issues facing expectant mothers by wearing a simulated pregnancy belly for twenty four hours, telling reporters that wearing the sixteen pound prosthetic left him with sympathy for women and back pain. This is the

dumbest shit I've ever heard in my life. If having a big belly helped men understand women, the patriarchy would be long gone. What are you talking about? The dumbest thing you have all? It left me with his back also, like what a bitch ass one day and he was like, moll my back. Not aside from trying to misdoubt fire, they're falling population froblem. Japan is trying everything to figure out why their people aren't having more babies. And look, I'm not a scientist, but if you ask me, maybe

it's because they invented the PlayStation. Yeah, that thing has prevented more pregnancies than every condom dia FRAGM and i U D ever made ever. That's real birth control. Yeah, just be like all right, baby, you ready to have some sex or you know some real sex and that goods. Let me just finish this mission. Let messure I just I love the RPG, your boys get online. We're gonna all night. Baby. You're probably gonna want to live the

rest of your life without me. Yeah. Now, if we had more time, we could talk about how Japan is a warning to every developed country in the world that if your immigration policies are too restrictive, at some point, your population is gonna collapse. Or if we have time, we could have so much fun talking about how Japan basically has a Secretary of wrought arguing, which is wild, Like what does he do to the arm meats like snipe holes out of condoms. I'd love to figure it out,

but nobody got time for that. Before we go, I just wanted to remind you about a fantastic organization, Chapago. They deal with helping women deliver healthcare right all around the world, whether it's training doctors on family health, educating women on plant parenting, or building new systems to get women's health care to impoverish communities. They do it. Also, if you'd like to help them guarantee healthier futures for women and their families, then please donate at the link below.

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah ears editions. Subscribe to the Daily Show on YouTube for exclusive content, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast