Rihanna Teases New Single After 6 Years | Diane Kruger

show for you tonight. Chinatown is getting a whole new meaning. Elon Musk is in all our d m s and Ronnie Chang throws eggs at Halloween. So let's do these people. Let's come straight into today's headlines. All right, people, I'm gonna be honest with all the news happening right now. I don't think we have enough space in today's show. And I tried. I tried everything everything I could. I even tried putting all the news in a Panini press and and and swishing it down, but it didn't work.

The news just became crispier and more delicious. But we still don't have enough time. Fortunately not enough time. It's just enough time for a segment week Hall, and nobody got time for that. All right, Let's kick things off with the war in Ukraine, where Ukrainian forces are continuing to make gains on the ground against Russia, and Russia is continuing to make gains in scaring the ship out

of everybody. Tonight, Vladimir Putin personally overseeing Moscow's first major nuclear drills since he invaded Ukraine, simulating a massive nuclear strike, and for the first time, Putin issuing an ominous and unfounded warning Ukraine plans to blow up a dirty bomb laced with radioactive material in its own territory, Western allies warning Russia could use such an event as a false flag to blame Ukraine for an attack that Moscow carries

out itself. A dirty bomb is not a nuclear bomb and would be less harmful, but by using conventional explosives to spread radioactive material, it's an effective weapon of terror. Yeah, that's right. Russia might be gearing up to use a dirty bomb, which is a bomb that spreads radio active material, not a regular bomb that's into kinky ship. Like you were thinking, not me, that's what you were thinking. When

you heard that. And right now Putin is saying that Ukraine is planning to use a dirty bomb on themselves. But everyone can see through this. We know it's just a cover so that Putin has an excuse to use one on them. It's so transparent, it's like a kid going just say, you know, mom, I heard that Ukraine is gonna steal all the Halloween candy before you can hand it out next week. So if Halloween candy goes missing, you know who to blame. And by the way, please

don't buy raising as Ukraine doesn't like those ones. For transparent or not, this is pretty terrifying, not just for Ukraine. Does rush your thing these things through You're on the same border. Think about how how everything's gone wrong. Look at how poorly Rusha's entire invasion has gone Huh. Dropping a dirty bomb will probably end up backfiring on Putin. He's gonna be Danny's war room. Like, oh, ship, the Isstion give all Ukrainian soldiers laser eyes. That's so cool?

The soldiers did they get powered to generals? Like yes, Mr President, our men can't stop pooping. Not that's cool. Now, if we had more time, we could talk about how Russia is also now threatening to shoot down American satellites that are helping with the Ukrainian war effort, which would be bad news for everybody excepts baseballs because they finally

have something to do. But we don't have the time for that, because while Russia is planning shady ship in Ukraine, China is already doing shady shit all over the world. The Dutch Foreign Ministry is investigating claims that China is operating at least two unofficial police stations in the Netherlands,

which would breach diplomatic protocol. According to the allegations detailed in this report, Beijing has been operating underground, undeclared policing units to carry out persuasion operations aimed atquercing those suspected of speaking out against the Chinese regime to return home. But what's happening in the Netherlands might just be the tip of the iceberg. The Spanish NGO Safeguard Defenders says it's uncovered more than fifty unofficial police stations around the world.

It's found outposts in at least twenty one countries, including the UK, the US, and many parts of Europe. Okay, if this is true, this is terrifying. Can you imagine China has a secret police force in other countries where they harass and intimidate Chinese dissidents who are living abroad, and then they try and convince them to move back to China. Which how does that even work? Huh? What our agents just grabbing Chinese people abroad? Like, hey, we've

seen the crap you talk about China. You say one one thing about China and China will destroy you. You've better shut up about China, you hear me? And by the way, would you like to move back to China? We miss you. It's a great place. We've got we chat now now. China claims these officers are not secret police stations. They just used for administrative purposes like giving people drivers licenses and stuff. But if that's true, why are they keeping them all secret? Huh? You don't need

to be shady if you're just doing paperwork. Yeah, the DMV lady is never like, oh, you need to renew your passport. Be at this parking lot at tell the man in the green jacket that the sun shines in November. He'll give you a briefcase with your new passport and a gun. Use the gun to kill him. And if you don't like your picture, come back and we will retake it. Okay. Now, if we had time, we could talk more about how China is increasingly throwing its weight

around the world. Oh, we could figure out the best way to protect ourselves from Chinese influence and surveillance. I mean, maybe we can find the answer on TikTok. But we don't have the time for that, because while China is spreading around the world in secret, there's an even biggest superpower who just announced her plan to dominate the globe. Fans of superstar singer Rihanna have been clamoring for new music from her for years, and now it appears their

weight is almost over. Rihanna shared a fifteen second teaser on Twitter of our new single titled Lift Me Up. It's for the upcoming Black Panther movie Waconda Forever. This marks Rihanna's first single as a lead artist in six long years. For her fans, Thank you, Thank you, Jesus. Brianna is releasing new music, and on top of that, her song is gonna be part of the new Black Panther movie. Are you kidding? Oh fair, that's gonna be so great. I mean it's gonna be great for us.

It won't be great for the wa condons because it's gonna be hard to concentrate on fighting the bad guys when a Rihanna song starts playing. You know, I was gonna be like a time to defend our Oh surely are you hearing this right now? Are you getting this? Could you understand how bigness is Rihanna plus black Panther? What? I haven't experienced this much black joy since since that time Obama featured on that cardy BT track. Oh man, it was just like what wrap wrap That's right, I'll

tell you what makes my pussy went voting? Vote everybody, vote what I will say, though, I would say, you gotta admit Rihanna is keeping us thirsty. Huh. We've been all begging. We've been begging for an album for six years, and now she's like, okay, okay, I'll give you one song, and we're like, thank you, thank you, just one song. Now.

If we had the time, we could celebrate the release of this new track by listening to all of Rihanna's previous albums, But we don't have the time for that, because while Rihanna is about to take over your Spotify,

another billionaire is taking over your tweets. One day before he's expected to officially take over Twitter, Elon Musk walked back his previous promise to remove most moderation on the site, reassuring advertisers that it would not become a free for all healthscape or anything can be said with no consequences. Musk Asti visited Twitter's offices carrying a kitchen sink, tweeting entering Twitter HQ. Let that sink in, Oh, get it,

get it? Let that sink in. I know a lot of people think that was corny, but I think once you have eighty seven children, you're allowed to make dad jokes. You can do it. It's fun. Let that sink in? What I want? Noise? Where did he get that sinke? Not mean it works for the joke? Would he get the sink? All right? It is just the one he ripped out of the wall when the judge told him

he had to buy Twitter. If anything, Elon is the right billionaire to make this joke, you know, because if Jeff Bezos walked into Amazon with a sink, his employees would be like, oh wow, we're finally getting a restroom. He's like, no, no, go away, go away. And as as for that statement, you know, to the advertisers that Elon sends, I will say it's interesting to see Elon go from the free speech cameboy of the West to pandering to the advertisers and saying Twitter will be a

safe space for your advertising daughters. Yeah. The man has owned Twitter for one minute and already he's like, free speech is great, but you know what else is great? Money? Yeah, m Honestly, it's embarrassing. Yeah, not even not even one day of own Twitter, and Elon has already caving into the advertisers, folding like a tortilla around a crunch rap Supreme filled with corne Asada steak available only at Taco Bell.

What a schill, What a shameless, shameless shill. Now, if we had more time, we could get into how Twitter can try to stay relevant in the era of TikTok. Oh, how funny it would be if everyone stopped using Twitter and Elon must just straight up lost billion dollars. But we don't have the time for any of that, because while Twitter is entering a new phase, its top rival just got some very bad news of its own. Meta the parent company of Facebook, reported earnings that disappointed Wall

Street in a big way. To stop plunging more than after, the company revealed that it expects its loss is associated with building the metaverse to keep growing. Meta has already lost a staggering nine point four billion dollars on the metaverse so far this year, but Zuckerberg is vowing to stay the course. Look, I get that a lot of people, um might disagree with this, with this investment, but people are gonna look back on decades from now um and and talk about the importance of the work that was

done here. Not a lot of sympathy for Zuckerberg, but the wealth destruction across the board here remarkable from his peak last year. Zuckerberg is down about ninety five billion dollars. He used to be the third richest person in the world. After today he could fall to twenty six or twenty seven p twenty six or twenty seventh richest person in the pl disgusting. Now what what can you buy? Like? Everything? Yeah? Thanks to his investments in the metaverse, Mark Zuckerberg has

lost ninety five billion and his personal wealth. If the man was capable of feeling human emotion. Right now, he'd be stressed as health because keep in mind, keep in mind, once you fall out of the top ten, you no longer get to go to the v I P area at the illuminating orgy. No, you're in general admission. It's a terrible view. You can't even see the virgin goat sacrifice. What happened? Did it happen? Yet? Did it happen? It's

actually a goat, that's a virgin sacrificing something else. It's weird. Now, before you feel sorry for Zuckerberg, remember it's not all bad for him. Yes, he's down billion dollars in the real world, but in the metaverse he's still worth ten trillly in zuck Bucks. Oh yeah, and I will say kudos to Mark. Kudos Mark Zuckerberg. A lot of people have been talking about taking down big tech for a while, but he's the only one with the balls to do it to his own company. Be the change you want

to see in the world. See the meter. Now, if we had more time, we can talk about how virtual reality is never really gonna catch on a little until the hardware becomes less intrusive and cumbersome because I mean, like right now, putting on one of those Occulus headsets feels like I'm carrying a small child on my face. But we don't have the time for that because I

must our sacred sponsors with this precious advertisement break. We'll be right back Welcome Back Tuesday, to show you know, there's so much arguing in America today, but we hear the Daily Show think there could be even more. So to do our part, here's Ronny chatting with another installment of Proved Me Wrong as the candy hyper kids, candy apples, stuck embraces. It's like Christmas for dentists, except it's proved me wrong. Halloween. Addition, Halloweens sucks. Prove me wrong this candy. Dude,

it's America. That's candy every day. Will you give me free candy? Don't stop trying to from people. Pay you away once in your life, guys. And the Haunts houses, Yeah, to say about the Haunts houses, right, those are fun a little nervous system. And I said, I can't do that on you know, Valentine's Day. That's not fun. Ye, I don't know. I don't wart holidays where I sometimes ship my pants. That sounds personal. What is the history of Halloween? Satan's party before Christ comes to wipe him out?

That's all I know. Wait, so we end the yelle with Jesus because we summoned Satan during Halloween. People in candy You think that's how they started. Yeah, I guess not knowing your traditions is also an American tradition. Every other holiday is scarier than Halloween. Proved me wrong. Easter? What's scary about Eastern Easter? There's a giant bunny, that ship's chocolate that we pick up an eat. I think Chinese New Year's Let's let's Halloween. We're talking about this,

this dreg there's like lion dancers. People are letting off fireworks and crackers. I mean, you just have to keep your head out of scrivel and just keep landing fireworks. Okay, look at these other American holidays. Okay, Thanksgiving, Genocide of July, bombs, Christmas, some old guy breaks into your home and leave ship and eat cookies day. Halloween is definitely scarier than Flag Day.

So you're telling me. You go down to the Deep South and you've got a bunch of guys waving American flags that you you're not gonna be a little bit scared. I think Mother's Day is less scary than Halloween. Really depends on the mother. I have a great mother. Do you wish that he was married? You stole like Mother's there? Valantine Day, Valantine's there. You have to put yourself out there with a Valentine's to tell someone that you like them, with the chance that they might not like you back.

That is way scarier than a bunch of kids running around dressed up as the princess from Frozen. Okay, I'm baptized. If you get rejected, you know, you move on. But if you reject kids from giving them candy on holiday night, and they might stay at your house for like hours in the hair house and your house, That's what I do when someone rejects me on Valentine's Day. As well, sharing costumes stuff letther than sexy costumes. Prove me wrong.

Bus of all scary costumes, way warmer than sexy costumes. It's not too cold, It's okay. For rest of us, non models. We get cold when we're not wearing clothes. There's a price for fashion, yes, exactly, if you get to be like honestly, just kind of hot period for a night like Joseph is like a hot kitty cat or like a hot bunny, and no one gives a ship. Yeah, but this is New York City. You can dress up as a hot kitty cat all the time and no one will give a ship. But what about like Minnesota.

If you live in Minnesota, you dressed up like a sexy cat, you've been eased to death. Oh it don't get cold, It's don't get cold. Okay. So do you think that sexy costumes are better than scary costumes? Yeah, it makes everybody happy. Love is in the air. Sexy costumes will get related. So you know what, I think you just want the argument right there. I think this topic is over. I guess you should take the desk.

Thank you so much about running chaining right. Stay tuned because when we come back, Diane Puga, do you joining me right here on the show. So don't go away. Welcome back to the Bull Show My Death to Life. There's an internationally renowned actor you know from films like Inglorious, Boston Is and Troy. She's here to talk about her new children's book called A Name from the Sky. Please Welcome Diane Krueger. Dane Kruger, Welcome to The Daily Show.

Thank you first time right the Common Beat, The Daily Show and being Venue de Show. I don't speak French, so I don't know, but you you do, you do you. You're one of the more impressive actors I've ever come across in my life, because not only are you in some of the most iconic films, but you do it in multiple languages. So we've seen you in English films, We've seen you in German films, We've seen you in French films. I would love to know where you are

most comfortable acting which language? True, I don't want to brag, but truly I I'm comfortable in all languages. It took me a while. Yeah, it sounds like such a brag. I know, No, you know what. In French, I feel like I am a little bit of a different person. I feel sweeter, you know, I feel a little oh I like that. Yeah. And German it's definitely more to the point that makes sense. Yeah, yeah, And English is

just it's the easiest language. I find, like the easiest in terms of like it goes fast, it goes it's funny, like it's short. You know, you don't have to think about it. There are many actors where they'll dub the language or they'll change you the personally. What you one of the few way German speaking people love your movies in German, and then French speaking people love your movies in French. It's it's rare to find that. Now you're

adding to your resume as well. I mean when when they said Dian's coming on for a books, like what kind of book? And they said children's book? I couldn't imagine what it would be, but it's really beautiful. A name from the sky. Tell me what inspired the writing of the book. So, Um, I was in Los Angeles just before the pandemic and I was working right and my mom from Germany was there helping with my daughter,

who was about one at the time. And then the world shut down and you know, weeks turned into months literally, and I hadn't spent this much time with my mom since I was sixteen, and we started talking about my childhood and stories. You know, I've forgotten that. So and I remember that when I was a kid, and I was kind of an odd kid. Um that she changed my life by telling me the meaning of my name, which was quite unusual in Germany. I know that sounds strange.

Diane is a strange, not you know, uncommon name. Talk about that in the book. But Diane, I didn't know. It is not common in not common at all. So do they do they say Diane or do they say say Diana? And it rhymes with banana, like Diana banana. So even in Germany, the kids are the same, if

not worth okay, I can I can see it. But you know, look, so I when I started writing things down, and I um, I thought, well, if I felt odd with a name like Diane, I'm sure there's lots of kids that feel odd about their name where they feel they don't fit in. And so I started writing it down, and I thought about my own daughter and how we thought about giving her name, and that's kind of how

it started. It's a really wonderful book about belonging, about understanding where you come from, why you're special, why you're important. When when you think of your life, you know, as a mom, now, what are what are some of the things you hope to instill in your child that you know you wish, you know every child should have, you know, I really truly believe that every child that is born as perfect as it is, right, and we all have I can see it in my daughter and her friends.

They all have something special that is so powerful and they don't know it yet. Right. And when I became a mom, I felt the responsibility and the opportunity to give her wings, like to curate her world so that she can be whoever she wants to be, whether that's you know, not everybody can be an active, whether she wants to sell ice cream and washing square poets. Right, but whatever makes you you is great great, And so

I didn't grow up like this. But my mom changed my life when she said at fifteen, you can quit school and go to Paris for you. Wow, But she really did. She trusted me, right, She said, Okay, I'm gonna trust you because I was going to get kicked out of school for working as a as a model. And my principle said, your school was going to kick you out for working as a model because I was getting jobs in Paris and I was missing schools, the German school, I'm assuming. Okay, yeah, that sounds like a

very German thing. It's just like nine kida kno be sexy nine, okay exactly. And when I told my mom, I couldn't believe it that she said to me, no, I'm going to trust you. Okay, I know this is what you want to do. You should go and never looked back. No. But it's truly the reason why I am who I am today, the life that I've had is thanks to that. And I that's the one of the reasons I wrote this book is because I feel like we can make that happen for children and we

should trust them. I love that. And how old is your daughter now? She just turned for so she can read the book with you. She she must love. What does she think about the book that's written inspired by her? You know, it was a little to I mean, she totally totally called bs. I'm me being a goddess, right, it's just definitely or not a goddess. Um. She was not pleased with my choice of having red shoes on her dress with a blue dress and red shoes. She

that was a minor meltdown. Sheeted her outfits in the book. I like your daughter. I like this already. Yeah, now you know she's four, she's it's getting a little better. And when I told her. You know, I've been on this book tour and I said, I'm talking. I need to leave because I'm talking about your book, honey, and she started crying. So please don't sell my book. It's my story. I don't sell it. And so it's cute. I love this, you know, it's it's a wonderful story.

Um it's I love seeing you express your life in a completely different way. Thank you so much for joining us now see Gracias. Uh, thank you so much for being already appreciates im in the Star is available, now make sure you get it for you and your kids. Bank prook everybody, I'm gonna pay a quick break over what's up off the day. Thank you, m Ly. We'll not start show to thank you so much for tuning

in before we go. Before we yo, I wanted to remind you that tomorrow is vote early Day, so make your plan to vote early at vote early dot org. The mid term elections are approaching and the stakes are higher than they've been for generations, so please make sure that your voice counts. And by the way, we're gonna be seeing you next week in Atlanta, Georgia. The Daily Show is gonna be going there and doing a whole week of shows from one of the biggest battleground states

there is. Watch The Daily Show weeknights at eleven ten Central on Comedy Central. In stream full episodes anytime, I'll on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast