John Leguizamo Takes On Pence Being Ordered to Testify About Jan 6 | Princess Nokia

So I asked her what she thought of the show last night, and she was like, I'm sorry but on me who I fell asleep after the Wheel of Fortune. But I'm sure you all grave me whole. And I was, but, yeah, we've got a great show for you tonight. Oh. So let's get into the headlines, all right. Let's kick things off with some sports. The NFL has announced that it will allow its players to put the number zero on

their jersey's next season for the first time ever. Meanwhile, the Jets announced that they'll put zero on the scoreboard for the fortieth season in a row. Hey, hey, no, seriously, I think this is a great way for football players to celebrate the amount of brain cells they'll have left when they retire. I know that's so, but it's true. Okay, let's move on to some international news overseas. The dutch Man is facing legal action for allegedly fathering at least

five hundred and fifty children. The forty one year old is a sperm donor. He's accused, though, of lying about the number of kids he's fathered through sperm banks, violating agreements limits are placed on donors to protect children's health. It's unclear what legal ramifications he could face. Holy shit, come on, he donated enough sperm for five hundred and fifty kids. God damn dude, say something for the shower, bro. What But in this guy's defense, when you're this cool,

you have an obligation to procreate. I mean, who want to get knocked up by this sperm? But still, though, this is going to make for some awkward conversations, Mommy, what's my biological father like, honey? Or all about him? Is he loved to jack off? Good night, honey? All right, let's move out to Wisconsin because they're about to have an election for the state Supreme Court that's hugely important and not just for their but for the whole goddamn country.

And it's a little complicated to explain why in a short time. But fortunately I'm a Latino New Yorker and I can talk very fast, all right. I know you're wivery, I know you revery all right. All right, So let me break it down for you in my new segment A New York Minute hit the clock. Okay, here's what's at State one. Abortion what Roy versus Wade was overturned? Wisconsin automatically went back to strict anti abortion law from

eighteen forty nine. That is so long ago. You know what the number one movie was in eighteen forty nine, not that they weren't invent then. Yet the liberal wins, she can abort that law to gerrymandering. Republicans have permanently stolen the state legislature. A liberal judge can fix that. Shit. It's more technical than that, but I don't have the

time to explain. At three, Donald Trump ship TuS both Okay, And finally, let's move on to the major news about the arrest of Donald Trump, which is that Trump still has not been arrested. But don't worry, because there's still fifty other investigations going on into Trump, and one of them is about to feature a surprise witness in a major ruling of federal judge has ordered former Vice President Mike penns to testify before a grand jury about former

President Trump. Pens has been ordered to give testimony in the Special Council investigation of Trump's attempts to overturn the twenty twenty presidential election. The judgal private exchanges between Trump and Pence are not off limits. Prosecutors are focused on conversations the two men had on January six and also

in the days leading up to the capital attack. The conversations before January six, when Donald Trump and Mike Pence were on the phone one on one and Donald Trump apparently was rating him, calling him names, that sort of thing. In this criminal investigation, he is going to have to share that. Oh, come on, man, don't make Pence say all the names that Trump called him. Yo, that could take weeks. These jury members have families to go home too.

Although as a viewer it's something I'd like to see. Actually, President Trump brought me into his office and called me a little mashed potato boy, a jerk call for Jesus, a silver haired baby bitch. He called me the white Mitt Romney. I don't even know what that means, he said, if I didn't overturn the election, he would I mean, how would I put this? Make love to me in the hole where the poop? Who comes out? Now for more on this story, we go live to the courthouse

and Roy would Junior? Yeah, Roy, what do you think about Penn's having to testify against Trump? I think this is about to be the whitest trial of all time. You got Mike Pinch, you got Donald Trump. It's about to be whiter than the Gwynefaltrol case. In that case got snow skin and Gwyni fal true. Roy, that's a good point. And it seems like Pens really doesn't want to testify. Of course he doesn't. Trump supporters are gonna try to kill him again, and and some of those

supporters of women. So Mike Pence is double scared. According to his beliefs, if you get killed by a woman, you go to Superhal. You're to Superhal and they don't even give your bathroom breaks in Superhal. Yeah, it's almost like an Amazon warehouse. But but there's a way out for Mike Pence, there's a way out for Donald Trump. But neither one of them are gonna like it. If Pence doesn't want to testify against Trump, then Trump and Pence gotta get married. Way, but Mike Pence what wait

wait wait wait wait what what? What? What are you talking about married? I'm talking about the lord job. You don't have to testify against your spouse. And I know what I'm talking about. I watch all the law and orders, even the bad spinoffs. Okay, okay, but still, how can they be married? They hate each other. All married people hate each other. It's not like hating your spouse would be a big adjustment for Trump. Help Melanie would be so happy to Trump's getting married to Pens shit, walk

them down the aisle herself? Who presents this band for marriage? Me? Due Milania? Who out there? Donald? And and also, let's just be real about this, John Trump and Pitts get married. They might just end up hitting it off. Maybe they fall in love, Maybe they adopt a child together. The kid grows up to be the whitest kid in history, a kid, a kid so white he can gentrify building just by touching it. I'm talking about talking about superwhite. I'm talking about a kids so white that he you

don't even have to go to Coachella. He just summoned Coachella around him. He just right, right right, he's summoning Coachella. Come right, come on, bringing on, look, come on, come on, focus, focus, Please look brother, please sorry, I'm sorry, man, I'm it's just also white. Hold these white ass cases. Look, I gotta I gotta, I gotta go, dog. I need to do something black to rebalance myself. I'll let you be. Hey, can somebody deny me a bank loan? How you doing so? Hey? Well?

Thank you? Ry right? Would you or everybody? Go? All right? Welcome back to the balling floor. My dead Tonight is the queen of the New York underground, a rapper, songwriter, and actor, and her new EP is called I Love You But this is goodbye. Please welcome. There's no kio. He let it have reception. Oh, I love you where you are? Look at that? Yeah? Now you're you're a hype. You're a multi hyphenadi singer, actor, producer, director, voice. Oh but isn't the idea of being very successful to have

to work less? Yes? I mean some would say it's working harder now smarter. I am a multi hyphenad. I've done so many things. Musician, actress, comedian, director, songwriter, and what drives that, what drives all that creativity, you know, the need to want to express myself taking boredom and you know they say, uh, bored idleness is the double playground. Yeah, and I don't want ever want to be in the double's playground. I want to have fun. Yeah, and you do.

And You're work is so powerful and I mean, I'm so inspired by you. And you chose your stage name Nokia because the telephone is so undestructible and you're indestructible, I would say, so it's a finished company. At the time, I was using Obama phones because you know, we was just that poor, so I couldn't call myself Princess Obama Phone and I just the same ring, No, I was.

I was too young to having Okia, but um, I chose something with a futurist angle because I liked the idea of having something old and new and that, you know, Disney princesses all their moms are dead and my mom's dead, so I figured, well, let me add a little dead humor to that as well. I love the way you mix it all together. It's amazing. But both were both street kids, yes, you know, I went to a fresh

air fund that survive the New York City public school system. Uh, how do you use your street streetness and your lens of the Latinida to do your storytelling? Oh? Well, I was really fortunate to grow up in an extremely vivid cultural upbringing. You know, being afrom Indigenous was what I was supposed to do. On the weekend when my girlfriend was playing double Dutch and hanging rope, I was at Powwells just like why, you know, Like I loved my upbringing.

But it's funny because you know, there's so many interest intersections of my childhood. And there's the public school, you know, being in Jefferson Park with my friends, and then there was the times where I didn't connect with my friends, where I didn't get to have sneakers or you know, being wearing lip claws that I had to, you know, go to ceremonies or to go to the un today a performance, something of the sort. Um. But I think that you know, I'm very street, I'm very I'm very protective.

You know. I was taught to fight with my words in my hands. Oh yeah, and and be vivacious and be protective. And I am protective of myself and my loved ones. Yeah, that comes out in your work. I mean, I'm such a big fan of your work because you know, I feel like I see myself in you, you know, and it revitalizes me as as an older artist seeing like the young Latinas that have, you know, such self worth and strength and vivacity, not afraid of their power

and strength. Yeah, I was selling John, I was telling I was selling to the crowd. Is the camera here here? I was telling John earlier that he's one of my biggest inspirations. Is him and Martin Lawrence that created my identity. Yeah, you off the same height, we're both shortcas I'm there too, yea yeah yeah, um yeah. Like I watched freak sexoholic spick around a ghetto clown, like you watch that inappropriate crap?

Come on, they allowed me to watch it. It was the it was our household thing is we we saw you and we saw ourselves. That's beautiful because thank you. I mean when I when I wrote my stuff, I wanted to write it for all the young Latino kids that weren't seeing themselves and that they felt them visible, and I wanted them to feel like I saw them

you know. That's why I wrote it. Now you got your new EP coming out right, it's a radio that's okay, everything is misinformed, but this is about love, right this How many rumors have you heard about? But it is about love though. This is the first time you're talking about love. You you've never been this vulnerable before. No, right now, Um, it was it was the time, it was I was speaking. I always speak from my heart.

I always speak from a personal experience. You know. Uh, nineteen ninety two covers my my life as a child growing up and all the intersections of my life from childhood to adult. You know, girl, kay read is about my love and rock music. Everything is beautiful. It is a neo soul jazz um album with R and B. Everything Sucks kind of had like a ICP effect to it. It was a little bit more fun in this. I stripped it down. I wanted to sing. I would say when I m C, I'm happy, and when I sing,

I'm sad. Like when I got the blues, I sing so I had the blues and I was going to get married and that dress and I didn't And um, I like using No, it's okay that this is it's okay, Like I'm a young woman, and I said this to Billboard and the Insider. I said, everyone is so used to me being the rap or the strong woman, that the soup thrower, you know, um, the voice of a generation, but no one has ever heard me or and I've

never allowed myself to be that. I don't talk about my personal life online, so no one would know who I'm dating. No one knows who I'm talking about. It's no one I've ever posted publicly, so someone could have an idea, and they completely have no idea what's going on. So I put all of these intricate things about a failed relationship, but the takeaway of the project is really that that person was intern excuse me. That person allowed me to feel love. They allowed me to feel a

little something, you know, I hadn't felt. I hadn't dated in like five years, and like I think that, like I just you know, hooked up with my child's sweetheart and we had a love tunnel and it was fabulous, and then it was hot and saucy and sexy and and then scary and I've been scary, and then we were gonna get married and it was gonna be amazing, and then I left because it didn't serve me and I serve my hot purpose. And I spoke to God and God said, get your guys out there, and I said, okay.

And but I tell him he's listened to the music, he loves the project. He was still good friends. You know, we were a part. I know. I want to go back to that soup thing. What happened, Well, what happened that public lamps are kid, I'm not kidding. I don't know if y'all know what happened. Well, she's gonna tell you now. And I've spoken about it publicly because um I public attention gives me nervous. And I was on the front of the metro or in the metro and I was like, oh my god, my name is like

in the paper. It went viral. That video went viral. I still don't realize. I realize that I'm a person of interest. Like for me, I'm just destiny in somebody's face. You're gonna be advent to a lot of people. This is what happened. This is from this is the mouth. Um before that man started saying slurs. A group of young men who were like on a basketball team, black and Latino brothers, and I remember thinking, wow, look at kids getting air, being outside, being healthy, playing sports. That's

a beautiful thing. You look. Oh, oh my people, look at Oh look at young man being a gentleman. Okay. And this man came on to the train and he bumped them purposely, and that was the first thing I've seen I've seen an adult bump a chow and I thought that was very weird. And then when they got off, he drunkenly just said these and words, and I got up and I said, how dare you? And I just sucked him in the eye and he called me so I didn't want to say that. I didn't want to

say that. I said it on Twitter once, but I don't want to say that to publications in case he tried to sue me. But um, you know, I was like, man, yeah, so that's actually what happened. There was a whole discourse before the soup. The soup is what happens very last, what I says, You're not about to talk about black people like that, not in my face. I would never like xenophobia and and anti blackness. That makes my skin crawl. I'm like that. You can't stay quiet because if you

stay quiet, then you're you're you're kind of guilty. Well, people stay quiet because people are crazy. You don't know what they're capable of. He could have punched me back, he could have slapped me, he could have spitn me, and I have been punched back before standing enough for myself. I got really lucky. Um. Then he started hurling racial slurs at me. And when I said what I said, I said to him very distinctly, you don't ever talk about people like that. Don't ever fix your mouth to

say something like that. A whole bunch of men came to my aid, and it was brothers and like people just it was like the train of New York just came behind my back and these two brothers they looked at me said we got you this. I said, okay, and then we and then everybody like white black polka dot red was like, you can't talk like that, that's not okay as white man, and it was white men going, dude, what's wrong with you? Are you sick? And love that?

It was like I was a and it was so that it made me take it because we all collectively threw him off the train. It was done. You see the mom they're growing him. And I had just went to Panera Bread and got me a butternese squaw and I that was my thing. I used to get me a butternet squash soup and go to Brooklyn and you know, be a New Yorker and I was like, well, shit up, excuse me, I'm sorry, oh man from me. He'd done sever racial slurs, he done got in my face, he

made a fool of himself. He about to get this soup too, So I just I was like, you know what, I've already punched him. I've already did that. That's all off camera. I remember I went to get my bag because I was like, oh my, got my bag and then I was like sup. And without even thinking about it, without didn't even thinking about it, it's in two seconds. I swear to god. It was from fourteen streets to

the first stop of the L train. So you know that underground tunnels like extra three minutes yea, So it's like it felt like a long time, but it was just one train stop, and it was it was. It was wild and I stand behind that. You know. I was taught, um. I was taught to always if you are about something, be about something. And I would never strike my brother sister unless they, you know, provoke me first. But when it comes to defending blackness, I'm or you

know Latin that being in anything. You know that I am everybody's vulnerable. Yeah, absolutely, And we were just at a point in the time, like in society where that rhetoric was just so you know, and I I caught that man in his face because you got it like that you got she's she's a poetess, a singer, sensitive and she can knock you out. I mean, the other perfect woman. I'm pretty frail, but I would like to think that I can always you know, if a friend is in need, I can help. Well I'm a friend

in need. If you ever need me, I got you back. I love you, Thank you for coming. I love you. But this is the guys available. Now. Okay, we're gonna take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. Well that's our sholf for to night it okay, before we go, please consider supporting a Fresh Air Fund. They provide free outdoor summer experiences to children from New York

cities underserved communities, and I was one of them. They took my brother, me and my cousin and it was life changing and if you can, I really appreciate if you donate to them at the link below. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show wherever you get your podcast What's the Daily Show? Weekday to eleven ten Central own comedies and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast