Chelsea Handler Tackles The Chinese Spy Balloon | Sen. Raphael Warnock

on ecstasy. So let's get this party started. Okay, Let's kick things off with the big story that burst into the news over the weekend. Someone in China had a big birthday party and lost one of their balloons. Another major story this morning the ongoing drama surrounding that Chinese spy balloon shot down off the South Carolina coast this weekend as Navy divers search for debris. This video shows what appears to be part of the balloon being brought

back to shore Sunday. The balloon, with a payload the size of three buses, first entered US airspace over the Aleutian Islands last Tuesday. It moved to Canada, re entering US air space over Idah Once the balloon reached the Atlantic coast, it was shot down with a single sidewinder missile from an F twenty two fighter jet. Order the Pentagon to shoot it down on Wednesday as soon as possible. They decided that the best time you do that was

got over water. Wow, Joe Biden really likes giving that announcement. He hopped off his big, strong plane and he walked over with his Aviator sunglasses, looking like a real tough guy popping a balloon, giving off some serious top gun Maverick vibes the straight kind. Honestly, though, poor Joe Biden Obama got to order the assassination of Bin Lauden or all he gets to do is murder a bag of helium. And as you heard, this balloon was the size of

three busses. I love measuring things and busses. And for the rich people out there who don't know what a bus is, they're those big yellow vehicles that bring Matt Gates's girlfriends to school. So the balloon went over Alaska, and then it went through Canada and then into US airspace. And by the way, Canada, thanks for the heads up on that. Canada saw the balloon and They were like, oh,

look one of those Chinese lanterns. And I hope that balloon wasn'tspiring on Canada because there is nothing suspicious going on there. Unless you want aerial shots of moose getting each other from behind, you can move on. And as usual, America went haywire and brought out way too much firepower to address this problem. They brought two fighter jets and shot a missile through a balloon. Was that really necessary?

Couldn't we have just hired another hot air balloon to float by and shoot it with a bat begun or just waited for it to get stuck in a ceiling fan. Do we really need the fighter jets to turn this thing into the world's saddest used condom? But hey, why not shoot it? When you have a trillion dollar defense budget and all these rock hard missiles lying around. Trump must be so jealous. What I don't get is why does China even need to send this balloon in the

first place. They're already spying on us with TikTok? Is it possible that the Chinese spies became the first people ever to get sick of TikTok? Were they, like I swear to God, if I see one more basic, bitch, make a lasagna and a slow cooker. And by the way, China, if you're listening, which you obviously are, next time, why don't you make your balloon the color blue so we can't see it in the sky, or if you're gonna make it white, at least right the moon on it.

No one here will know the difference. I certainly won't. An other exciting news, Marjorie Taylor Green a k a. Capital Storming Barbie hates her job, which is so funny because the rest of us also hate her. Having her job. Becoming a member of Congress has made my life miserable.

The nature of this job. It keeps members of Congress and senators in Washington so much of the time, uh too much of the time, to be honest with you, that that we don't get to go home and spend more time with our families, our friends, um, you know, all in our district, or maybe just be regular people, because this job is so demanding it's turned into practically year round. First of all, you're not a regular person, you moron. You're a congress person because you campaign and

somehow one which requires you to work year round. I also don't want to work year round, and that's why I don't to quote Kim Kay for a second, get your pass up and work. The point is, if you don't like being in Congress, then go work at foot locker, bitch. But that's not even the worst part of what she said. This is I have people come up to me and say crazy things to me, um out of the blue and public places, um that they believe because they read it on the internet. Well, if that's not the pot

calling the kettle Q and on. This woman thought nine eleven was a hoax, that the Clinton's killed JFK Jr. And that Jews are in charge of space lasers. But please don't come at her with some crazy ideas. She might believe them anyway. Moving along. Luckily for MTG, we can't spend the whole entire show talking about her because she has a coworker who is even more unstable. I'm talking about the broke, millionaire, half black, gay Jewish volleyball

star drag queen George Santos. Believe it or not, his resume keeps growing. Just this week, he's been accused of groping an AID And I will say this is the first thing about him that makes him sound like he does belong in Congress. Things are really starting to click for him. But before we could even let that sink in, we got hit with this other crazy lie. Meanwhile, George Santos was also a Broadway producer. At least that's what the in Battle lawmaker allegedly told potential donors when he

was running for office. In Bloomberg reports, Santos told supporters that he was a producer on the short lived Broadway production Spider Man Turn Off the Dark. The office of the plays producer confirmed that Santos did not work on it. The playo we ran for a short time and was plagued with technical issues and actor injuries. It lost millions of dollars during its run, and frankly a curious choice

for Santos to life out. A spokesman for the show said, quote, of all the tribulations the producers of Spiderman turn Off the Dark head to endure, we are very pleased, proud, and relieved to report them working with George Santos is not one of them. I do not get this, dude. How could he lie so much and not get better at lying? Why would you pick the most embarrassing Broadway show to lie about. That's like saying you heard of

the Titanic. I was the captain. But maybe this guy is smarter than he looks, because each new scandal makes you forget about the last one. I've already forgotten that he stole money from a dead dog. That's right, you heard me. He stole from a dog and then ghosted that dog. Who ghosts a dog? We've only known this guy for like five weeks. How are we already on season nineteen of his scandals? I feel like I need to put his scandals to like, oh, we didn't start

the fire, so I can remember them. Nine at eleven, Volleyball, Spider Man, dead Dog. And finally, some good news for all the people who have been waiting for the world to end this weekend. We almost got there. Right now, to the other big story. We are following the dangerous Arctic blast that is smashing records across the Northeast, many spots having felt temperatures this brutally cold in decades, Winchells in Portland reaching minus forty five and in Boston thirty

nine below uncharted territory for both cities. The ones in a generation cold, reaching the peak of nearby Mount Washington, where it felt like a jaw dropping minus won a way. Meteorologist Francis duranswits measures conditions outside every hour. Before I really knew what was going on, my legacy to have knocked out me and I was on the ground. The Mount Washington Reservatories live stream showed the intense conditions. NASA says the top of the mountain was slightly colder than

the average on Mars. I don't understand what colder than Mars means. Use a reference that ordinary Americans can understand. Was it colder than three busses? I hope it's not so cold that elot Musk won't be able to masturbate when he gets there. For more on this extreme weather, let's go live to Mountain Washington, where don't say slow and is on location. But no, no, no, no, no no not I'm in my bed. But you were supposed to report on the record low temperatures in New Hampshire. Listen,

white lady, you got the wrong one. You needed me to go through a mountain top to tell you that negative a hundred and eight degrees is cold. You know how I knew it was cold outside because the uber eats man told me it was cold, and that's all I need to know. Well, how are you supposed to report on the wind? If you're in bed, you need to be outside, No, ma'am, I know your tricks. Okay. The only reason anybody wants a reporter out in this kind of weather is to watch them fall and laugh

at him. Nope, nope, you're not slick. I can't fall down if I'm laying down. Checkmate. Do you really think as a woman, I would put another woman in that situation? Bitch? I'll know you. I give you the benefit of the doubt. Next thing I know, I'm falling off a mountain like a frozen Move faster. If you want to report on the cold, you'll go outside. Blond lady. Let me you look like you can handle it. You look like that bit from Froling anyway. But I have to be here

at the desk. You're here, this woman, she says, you gotta who are you talking to? Don't in your business. I'm not at work. What do you you are at work? Listen? Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. There's too much ship going on outside Okay, fires, floods, balloon parts falling from the sky like a bad porno. I'm an inside reporter, now, okay, like there's plenty of there's plenty to report on here. It's seventy one degrees.

I'm watching Scandal on Netflix and we're seeing a massive pile up of dishes in the seat, which is not my file. I can't do the dishes. I'm at work. Don't say you're putting me in a bad spot here. I was hoping for some or any reporting on Mount Washington. Oh, don't worry. Listen, listen, I'm professional. Okay, listen, I can get your report on Mount Washington. I got my sources right here. Let's see. You know my uber each driver I sit him there to get to school. I will

message him, now, what's up with that mountain? Is it cold as ship? Will you see me a video he fell down? I love when that happens, because I'll tell you what. It won't be made man, check m thanks for nothing. We'll say, don't say sloan everybody all right. When we come back, we'll talk about the latest diaphad that lets you lose weight and kill someone. So don't go away. Wore we show. If you are like most Americans, you love trying to lose weight while not losing any weight.

But now there's a new drug that really causes weight loss. There's just one small downside. You may have seen photos of celebrities and another showing off traumatic weight loss. Some say it's diet and exercise, yet millions openly credit drugs used to treat obesity and diabetes for getting so skinny. Ozempic is a drug that was developed to treat diabetes, but in recent months, demand for that drug has soared

because one of its side effects is weight loss. Many are now calling for this trend to end because it's causing a shortage in medicine that they desperately need. The company that makes so Xempic blames the shortage on interminute supply disruptions. Company also said, well, doctors might be prescribing ozempic for weight loss, the company does not promote doing so,

come on, stop stealing medication from diabetes patients. If you want to lose weight, just do a juice cleans and spend the next three days on the toilet like a normal person. But I'll tell you what if ozempic isn't going to be able to stop celebrities from taking it for weight loss. They could at least change their ads to warn diabetics about it. People with type two diabetes are excited about how ozempic treats blood sugar and weight loss.

Thanks to ozempic, I have a ton more energy now, which I need to fight off the hordes of real housewives trying to steal my ozempic. I said. All it takes is one dose per week and a panic room to hide from all the TikTok influencers. I'm not going out like Billy. They stripped him to his bones for his oz epic. Even a little TikTok danced what they did. Ozempic is not for everything. If you are not prepared to kill for oz empic, it may not be right for you. Check with your doctor to see if you're

healthy enough for extended fist fighting. In the event of a celebrity attack, ozempic sleek pen can be hidden inside director prevented theft. Ozempic has given me the freedom to live my oh ships. Ask your doctor about ozempic today. Thanks ozempic, Thanks ozempic, Thanks ozempic. I don't have it. That's what everybody says, this sen present ward. All right, thank tuned, because let me come back under to Rafael Warnock will be joining me on the show, so don't

go away. Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight A is a U S Senator and senior pastor of the historic Ebenezer Baptist Church. He's here to talk about his new children's book. Put your shoes on and get ready, please welcome Senator Rafael Warnock here. Hello, how are you. I'm just I'm so delighted to be sitting down with you. You are just a star of the Democratic Party, and I am just so delighted to be sitting here with you because who wasn't rooting for you

that I knew, no one. That was a very very tight race that you were in. Well, thank you, it's great to be here, and I'm proud of what Georgia did. Yeah. Um, and now you don't have an election. You don't have a runoff or a special election or any election for the next six years. That's right. My name was on the ballot five times in two years, so clearly I wanted this dog on job. Uh. And finally I have a six year term. Yeah, that's very that's very refreshing news for all of us, so we never have to

deal with that sort of canary again. I'm excited that you wrote a book. It's called put your Shoes On and Get Ready, which is about you growing up in a household. You were one of twelve children, and you were number eleven, one of twelve children. In my family, I'm number eleven out of twelve. My parents were both preachers. Clearly they read the scripture be fruit, be fruitful, and multiply. Yeah, well it was also nice nice of you. I mean, did you write a children's book so that herschel Walker

would be able to read it? So so I have I have two small children. My my daughter is six and my son is four. And the title of the book, put your shoes on and get Ready, to something my dad told me every morning. He had a fierce work ethic. You didn't sleep late in his house, and every day he said, get up, put shoes on, and get ready. And uh, it's something I passed on to my children. For me, it represents preparation, but also a sense of purpose and the recognition that all of us have a place.

I believe in the world. We've got gifts and things were supposed to do, and I'm fighting every day to make sure that every kid has a place in America. And also we're also fighting pretty hard to be able to work across party lines and work with a lot of Republicans that would we would a normal person would think it was too hard to work with people like Ted Cruz. Um, you're working with him on something I know. I want to ask you, like, how how do how

do you operate that? Like, how does that work for you? Well, I'm a pastor, so you know, I'm used to inviting whosoever will. I'm used to working with all kinds of folks, and Um, I have found that in the Congress. Yeah, we have our differences, they're real, but you're right. I did an amendment with Ted Cruz. He he and I are on the Commerce Committee together. I disagree with him most of the time. Um, Honestly, some days I'm sitting

there listening like really, uh. But but as it turns out, one day there was something he wanted to get done that I also wanted to get done. We couldn't get it done in committee. We had to take it to the floor of the Senate, and the night we passed by partisan infrastructure bill, he stood on his side of the out arguing about why he thought we should do it. I stood up on my side arguing why I thought

we should also do it. And then I closed with words I never imagine hearing myself say in closing, I'd like to associate myself, uh with with with the words of the senator from Texas. My colleagues, I think half of them didn't know what was in the amendment, but they said, if he's for it, and he's for it, let's pass it. It passed overwhelmingly, and it's really it was just an amendment to get us closer to building a highway out that goes through Texas, but it also

goes through Georgia. And even in this divided time, I think that there's a highway that runs through our humanity that's bigger than partisan politics. It's certainly bigger than race. And if we build out the highway, everybody can get to where they need to go. I think that's my job as a legislator, and I think that's the job of every citizen to try to find common ground to get the work done. And yeah, and considering the state of politics and the divisiveness of you know where we

are right now in this country. I mean, are you hopeful about voting rights? I know that's something that you're working hard for and that you're also Uh with police brutality that you guys had a caucus with the president. How do you see these things playing out in this time? Look, change is slow, it's difficult. It comes and fits and starts, but we have to keep working at it. So I'm not about to lose hope. I mean, if the preacher losers hope, then we were. You know, we're in a

dangerous place. So I'm not about to lose hope. Um. I was John Lewis's pastor. He didn't have any reason to believe that he could win. I think we looked back at the civil rights movement and we act as if these victories were inevitable, when in fact they were quite improbable. They kept fighting the good fight. He fought until the very end. Who am I to give up? And Uh, I was disappointed that we didn't get voting ranks done last Congress. Um, but I'm not about to

stop fighting. The last time we passed voting rights in this country. Uh, it passed on the Republican president, it passed the Senate I think nineties to zero. Some of those folks are still in the Congress. And democracy for me, is not just one issue alongside other issues. It's the framework in which we get to fight for everything we are about climate change, the issues around police brutality, uh,

giving people access to affordable, affordable health care. All of these things are fought for within the framework of our democracy. And so I'm gonna keep fighting until we get voting rights done. And with speaking on the subject of books, we have a you know, uh governor in Florida who is trying to ban books and trying to ban critical race theory. And uh, let's just talk for a second about how damaging that is for little children growing up in this country. Oh, I think I think it's it's

quite unfortunate. And we have to reject the idea that our children will be so traumatized by the truth of our complicated American story that they can't bear it. Um. Uh, you know the script forgive the teacher for quoting scripture, but Jesus said, you shall know the truth, and the truth will set you free. And um, all all stories

that complicated. All families have complicated stories, and so does the American family, and all of us have to push back against this idea that education as the enemy all of us red, yellow, brown, black and white. This black history is the American story. And uh, that's why I wrote this book. I deal with the issue of race in this in this book. So I don't know if

my book would be banned or not. Uh, but but I'll tell you, as a dad, I was trying to figure out how to talk to my kids about what I know they will encounter, and um, I think I deal with it in a way that honors the legacy of my dad, who, as I talked about in the book, was a He served in the army during the World War two era, all state side, and one day he was asked to give up his seat on a public

bus while wearing his soldier's uniform. For some the skin he was wearing was more important than the uniform he was wearing, and so he had to give up his seat. That's a part of the American story. But here's the other part of the American story. My dad had to give up his bus seat. Now I have a seat in the United States Senate. A kid who grew up in public's only in America. Only in America is my story possible. And we can't give in to the demagogus.

We can't give in to those who pedal in division, because people who have no vision, traffic and division. We have to fight for that grand American covenant e plura bus un them out of many one. That's what makes our country great. And I'm deeply honored to represent the

people of Georgia. Yeah. Yeah, And the people of Georgia are honored to have you because you instilled so much faith in them when the race was a tight and you had another election against you know who, you said, I believe the people of Georgia will make the right decision. And they did make the right decision. So it all ended up in the way that it should. And so yeah, you're a pleasure to have serving in the United States Senate. It's great to watch you. Thank you so much. Yeah,

thank you for being here. Um, what's your shoes on? And get ready it's available now, Senator Rockey on war right back after this. That's got shot today before we go, Um, powerful earthquake struct Turkey and Syria this morning prompting a massive rescue operation. I h H Humanitarian Relief Foundation teams are on the ground starting search and rescue activities. If you can help them in their work, please donate at

the link below. Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching the Daily Show wherever you get your podcast What's the Daily Show weeknights at eleven tenth Central on Comedy Central and stream full episodes anytime on Fairmount Gloves. This has been a Comedy Central podcast