S3 Ep1 - Vetting Your Dom

You can use the always use the flagging system. Green flag. So let's try it. Red flags I think.

Welcome to the Daddy Dom Podcast, season three. It's all about You These episodes will include topics sent in by the listeners of the podcast. If you have a subject or question you'd like to learn more about, contact me on my Patreon, any of my social medias, or email me. I'll put all the links. This episode. And that person How do you vet a suitable discipline? Well first off, most aspiring Doms get the Yeah. Twitter. So it's no wonder that 90% It's like the blind leading the blind sometimes.

Hopefully. Land in the ten percent. Who have a clearer and more well rounded perspective on what Now I have had my trials and tribulations, and I take full responsibility and acceptance of all my faults. So but it's been a journey. We all have to start somewhere. And I might not be everyone Dom, but that's what we're here exploring today. What is the type of DOM that you're looking for and what you should be looking for in a DOM?

So before we get into vetting your Dom, whether it be in real life or online. I think it's important you must know thyself. Define your desires. define your self-awareness of your needs. At least as much as that you're aware of right now at the moment, uh as you continue your growth as a as a sub.

And to that, I think what's even more important is to know what you don't want. I don't want these things from my Dom. That's extraordinarily important because We get caught up in the heat of the moment, and that can lead to clouding of the parameters we've set for ourselves. uh the sub's desire to please their dom is more overwhelming than the parameters of the limits that they've set for themselves.

So if you haven't defined the parameters for yourself, the DS dynamic can become very one sided in that power exchange, and can sometimes get abusive. So always maintain You know, the parameters that you have in choosing your DOM that it fits, you know, you gotta find that right fit. It's not easy, but I know we can do it together.

And as I said, a submissive desire and lust can be so strong, especially in subspace. that it is the responsibility of your Dom to maintain control of your well being, taking what they want, giving what you need, but not ever crossing the line. One of the big roles of being a good dom is to build the sub's confidence, not tear it down. And this includes giving you the confidence to articulate your boundaries. Which can be as simple as three words. Yes, no, and Maybe

So you should never suffer in silence. Many subs in their submissive role don't use their voice to be heard. Be heard. Your dom simply just may not know the indiscretion or the overstep that they have taken. But if you don't use your voice, the violations will continue and be repeated. In any relationship, communication is is the key, but I think in a DS relationship, I'd say even more so in a DDLG relationship, it's almost a hyper communication.

There's a lot of contact, more than most other relationships that I have b experienced. So communication is the key. Uh keep it free, keep it non-judgmental, and can be heard. So let's look at qualities your DOM should have. And I think outside of the bedroom, everyday life. A good Dom should have empathy. They should have patience.

And they should have consistency. I think those are three good attributes for any DOM to have, you know, moving throughout their their their own journey and uh and bringing you into that. You can use always the use of flagging system. Red flags, green flags. So let's try with that. Red flags, I think, would be ignoring your boundaries. Um, dismissiveness. Um Mm-hmm. refusing to take responsibility for their actions if they have overstepped.

I think those are big red flags. Those are three big red flags that I would probably start to go, hmm, because A, your voice is not being heard, you're being disrespected, and how can you trust anyone like that?

Green flags, on the other hand, should be a free flow of communication. So you're not fearful of saying something. Um, I think that's very important. have them if they are respectful regardless of your status or your orientation, I think that's very important. You have to respect, you know, your partner, you have to respect your sub. Um happy to discuss. All your king.

All of them. You know, even the crazy ones that you're, you know, the ones that you're kind of flipping through, you know, and you're kind of like, eh, no, it's not for me, but you kind of scroll back a bit and said, hmm, maybe I'll take another look at that kink. And I think it's important to discuss all our kinks with each other, um, without judgment, you know, uh I don't can't remember what that saying is. Uh, but you know, the saying about um don't uh what is the saying? Don't

Don't yuck someone's yum. That's what it was. Don't yuck someone's yum. Took me a while, but I got it. Also, what else would be a green flag? Um It's important that they don't portray themselves as a as a know at all. You know, I started from a beginning point and I knew nothing, zero.

Um and I had a progressive gur journey of like all my failures and uh and and misgivings and uh learning what my personality and what the type of Dom I was. If you come across someone who thinks they know it all, and I certainly don't know it all. And I don't think anybody knows it all.

But it's, you know, either, you know, their way or the highway and they know it all. Uh, I don't think it's that's I think that's a red flag. So if they come off as they're willing to learn, willing to grow, I think that's a a huge green flag as well. Um also eager to again the communication, eager to discuss your limits, your hard limits, your soft limits, um, your what were you willing to try, just hard nose.

And I think I think another one that uh might be hard to do when vetting a DOM and whatnot, but it's kinda like a a Google review. See how their rel past relationships are maintained. Do they have a healthy relationship with their former uh partners or former relationships? uh or even their play partners. Is there a good vibe between those people? A good conversation if they ever were to, you know, meet up or see each other or whatever?

um, you know, is is is there a good rapport uh between past relationships? And I think that's important uh because it does kind of give you a Google review on uh on on the type of DOM that you're looking for.

One of the other things that I've always heard about and uh It was a term. It's called matching your energy. Do you want to find a DOM that matches your energy? And What does that mean? And so I try to think about what that means, matching your energy. And I think it's an understanding each other of where you're coming from. Ah, let's just take it into the bedroom. Whether it be a C and C role play all the way through to a D D L G roleplay

Does it match your energy? You know, you've had the talk about respecting, you know, the rules and uh and boundaries that you've set and that you can get in there and completely just immerse yourself in that role play. And does that match the energy? You know, are you kind of like on the same vibe? I think that uh is what is meant for me when you're matching someone's energy.

And I think you can match your energy in the bedroom and not as much elsewhere, or vice versa. I think you match energy with people that you, you know, maybe at the gym with or whatever, or you just have, you know, cafe chats with in case you know, if you if you do those sort of things. But I think matching your energy in um in playtime is what you're kind of looking for in a DS relationship because it really does that physical bond. does bring the rest of everything to us together for sure.

So I know I've haven't touched on it a lot. and uh we've kind of discussed a whole bunch of different things. Um and it's kind of been the Coles notes of uh what you're looking for in a DOM. But you know, go back and let's take a listen to it again. And let's uh all the things that we've talked about uh in this episode I think encompasses one word. And I think as that's character. You're looking for someone who has character. And I think that goes beyond someone's personality.

Character is something that they hold within themselves. It's the type of way they hold themselves, they present themselves, they carry themselves. And I think a good character is what you're looking for and the character that you're looking for as a sub in your DOM. I hope... some of this has helped in your guidance and direction and finding a you know the best Dom for you. and I wish you all the best, and I'd love to hear your journeys on finding a dome, the pitfalls, and the uh

celebrations that you've had together. So message me and let me know your stories.

Now, for today's audio. it was difficult for me to find something that kind of related to finding a Dom, because it's always been from my perspective as a Dom. So I had to hunt down through the literally hundreds and hundreds of audios that I've done and s forgotten about in the past. But I think this one kind of relates. If it doesn't, it's fucking sexy anyway. So earbuds in. Stay tingly and happy hunting. Sorry. Uh Faster. Mmm, we're neck that's. Well. Yeah. Kiss me. Kiss me all over.

Struck my cock. Uh your hands on my cock and balls. Uh fuck I want you Mm-hmm. Where's the hop? Oh. I'm gonna rip your legs around me. Hold on tight, baby. Hold on tight. Hold on tight. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, pitting you against the law like this. Do it with your legs and arms. Oh. Oh yeah, just fucking against the wall. Ha ha ha! My feet dangling. Uh yeah. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah, just putting you down. It's true. pulling your hair. Give me that. I'm sucking on your neck. Uh

Look at me. Oh, gimme your tongue. Mmm. Yeah. Gimme that tongue. Stick it out. Stick it out. Mm-hmm. Suck on that, John. Could I turn it on? Sloppy little mess. Okay. Ah, you're falling off the bed. Come here. Oh yeah. Oh propped myself up on my arms. Grab your ankle. Grab your ankles high and wide. Oh yeah, look down before you Oh yeah. I love looking down at your naked body while I punch you. I love how you watch my cock. Oh looks so good. Oh yeah, it looks so delicious.

Hold on to those ankles, baby. Uh yeah. Uh just put myself upright. Yeah. Oh, I love when it's just our cock and your cunt touching and nothing else. Oh such a gorgeous sight. Oh yeah. I love when you watch me fuck you. Oh it doesn't turn you on as much as I love her watching you. Yeah. All right. Apparently. Here we go already. Get you on top of me. I love the way you move your hips around. Gride your clit against my pill. Oh, it's fucking deep inside you. Awww yeah.

My hands all over your tits. All over your body. Mmm, fuck me, baby. Come on. Fuck me. Get up on your feet. Put your hand on my chest. That's it. Ah, there you go. Ah yeah, that is fucking gorgeous. Right in my face. Yeah, ride that cock maybe. Uh yeah, right. I want you to come. Gonna grab you by the throat. Pin your forehead to mine. Grab your hips. Come on. There we go, girl. Come all over my cock. Mmm. I love those tits. Mmm. Okay.

Just collapse on top of me. And it's gonna continue pumping my cock inside you. Oh yes, the direct. Fuck. Oh yeah, when you're on top of me. Oh I can just squeeze you off with my hands wrapped around your back and the back of your neck. Nust will fold you nice and tight. Good girl. Oh your fucking card feels so Oh just a slaby mess. Come here baby. Mmm, come here. Let's grab you by the ankles.

I'll just pull you down to the edge of the bed. Get that ass up in the air. Come on. Get that ass up in the air. One deck on the floor and the other up on the bed. Oh that perfect ass. Oh, right from behind, baby. Down on the mattress. Oh yeah, I love you in this position. Oh spanking that ass. So good my cock inside yeah. Give me here, give me those wrists. Oh, putting them behind your back. Yeah, give me that pussy. Right over top you.

Uh Oh yeah, I just can't stop fucking I can't stop fucking- Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh look at that pussy. Mmm pussy slaps baby. With your arms pinned behind your back. Oh I love how you squirm. Uh Mmm one more. Nice and slow. Right from behind. Yeah, I'll do it. Just be Face in the mattress. Uh While I use this fucking aw Oh yeah. I'm ready to come, baby. I don't want to come this way. Yeah, flip over. Mmm because that's pussy. On your back. Mmm tummy. Mmm breathing hard. Ah, you come. Oh yeah.

Uh just a nice Range down and put your Fingertips on my balls and coax the cum. Cause I don't want to fill you up. You look me in the eyes, baby. That's it. I want you to watch me come like I watch you come. Yeah. I could fuck you forever. Oh yeah. Come here. There come. Oh give me. I love how you crush my ball stick to last. Deep inside you Feeling here. Squeeze my cog. Milking out every Draining me that way. I could fuck you for