The Salem Witch Trials: Yes, And....She's A Witch

There was this one time in seventh grade, I might have talked about this before, where Kendra and I, we had a mock witch trial.

And Kendra and I were the afflicted girls. And we came in period costume. Oh. We came in period costume. And every time the witch would, like, say something, we would scream and, like, move our deaths away. And then we fought in trouble. We got in trouble for being too authentic. She was like, you guys need to settle down. And we were like, the afflicted would never settle down. Music.

How was your week? Really good. Yeah. Oh, we hung out. We? Oh my God, we hung out. We saw each other. This is the third day in a row we've seen each other, which is like- Isn't that wild? We used to be normal, and now it's- Yeah, and now it's like very not normal. We got to hang out on Saturday, and it was kind of like, it wasn't planned, and so that's when you have the most fun. It is. It is. And it was like planned, random hang. Unplanned, random hang. Yeah. And that was super fun.

And then, oh, on Friday, I got my new work car. Oh, yeah. Like a little Volkswagen Tiguan. I know. I don't know if that's how you say it. I don't know either. I was actually looking at it and I was like, I don't know. I think it is how you say it. Maybe. Perhaps. I just think it's so cute. Yeah. It's really cute. I feel like it's a good me car.

Thank you, my work. and and yeah no things last week was great and then today was a real life monday where, it was kind of like a slow to wake up and slow to like get my life together but i was really productive for the hours that i work today and soccer and soccer and soccer usually soccer but yeah no it was um it's been good how was your week it was very busy but with like all fun things. Oh, that's right. I did. I went to the spa. Who are you? Which I've never really done. I know. Which one?

Reggie Bernardo Inn. Glen Idy? Oh, Reggie Bernardo Inn. Yeah. It was really fun. It was nice. I met some new friends. And then, which is like very unlikely. What is happening? Who are you? Well, it wasn't as bad as last year on Tanya's birthday where I just made lifelong best friends. I made like pretty chill acquaintances. You literally called. did you call me or text me? And you were like, let's go. We're meeting up here. And I was like.

Like, let me look at my phone. Was it you? No, it's Tanya. I forget. At her birthday last year. You were like the social, like, butterfly that you aren't. And I was like, what is happening? Yeah, it was wild. Yeah, it wasn't that this year. It was at a spa. So it was like very chill. Yeah. And then I went to a concert. And then I went to a chaperoned a field trip, then went to Disneyland right after.

But she's fucking crazy. honestly chaperone field trip after that i need to be horizontal like there's no other i've used all my energy to be like my best self in that few hours and the the rest of the day i just need to be horizontal and an asshole like there's no yeah rally and go to disneyland fine it was a halloween at disneyland which we haven't done yet because we've just been so busy so it was kind of nice Yeah. That's what I text. I'm like, you somehow recharge at Disneyland.

I do. I'm the biggest introvert. And then you put me with a bunch of strangers. And it was really fun, though, because me and my friend Emily, we like sat, we let the kids go on the Incredicoaster by themselves. So they waited. Oh, my God. So they probably felt like the biggest kids, too. And then we sat there and kind of like people watched on the dock. And there was like influencers that were like dressed up. and then they were taking pictures with other influencers and then they'd part ways.

I mean, no judgment, but it was just really funny and bizarre. It was cool to watch. I fucking love people watching. I love people watching. And what better place to do that than at Disney because everybody is like...

Their like most self because they're like oh i want to go all out like people don't hold back at disney yeah there were many many people dress like ariel but like in her like like the blue dress that she wears when she's going around town with prince eric oh okay gotcha gotcha gotcha gotcha i immediately went to bell and that was wrong when you said blue dress but i also think bell wears yellow i don't know why i went there she does she wears

a blue dress and a yellow dress Oh, okay. See, there you go. That's why. But, well, that's fun. Yeah. So I guess we will get into it. Let's do it. Let's do it because it's nighttime and we said we weren't going to do it nighttime. Remember that one time we were like, let's always record during the day. That was fun. Honestly, it might not even happen this week if the guys didn't want to watch football and we weren't like, let's do this while they watch football.

It's kind of a perfect situation. The husbands are inside with children and we are in this office outside. Yeah. Outside, but inside. Kind of perfect. And not watching football. Go sports. Go sports. I used to be really into football and now I just, I feel really sad when people get cut and it like hurts my heart. Oh my God. Do you watch, what is it? 30 for 30? No. Is that what it's called? It's Hard Knocks. So we started watching Hard Knocks back when we were both into football.

And then it like I started like my heart like I couldn't take it it's so sad because you get attached to these people and then you watch them get crushed yeah I was like no well you know for me it's always been a social thing I just I'm like whatever gets my friends together, that's true yeah um so this week oh I'm Jenna oh I'm Jess, This week. Let's get spiritually fucked. Okay, wait. Can we also mention that we were trying to sell the podcast on Tommy last night? Oh.

Saturday night. And he was like, it's not really my. And then his eyes glanced over at Jeff. It was my thing. It was so painfully obvious. I read what his eyes said his eyes were screaming he basically said i listened to jenna like edit and i hear the raw fucking like recordings i can't choose to listen to that for fun because i can't handle your laugh he literally can't handle it and then when he got caught because It was very obvious.

He backpedaled so hard. But it was so funny. It's so funny because, like, obviously, I don't, like, get mad about that shit. But I know he would feel so bad about, like, her. It's just a trickle. It's so funny. Oh, my God. It was so good. Tommy was Squirmville. That was for sure. But honestly, I'm like, I get it. I get it. I don't like my laugh. It took me so long to be okay with the way I sound. I still am not. I feel better. I actually always hated my voice. And now I'm like, whatever,

there's worse voices. You have a great voice, though. You're very kind. You do. You know when you would hear yourself on the answering machine like back in the day? And then you would be like, oh, God, that's so bad. Or maybe it was like something even just about like the 90s like answering machines. Maybe they like made everyone sound bad. Maybe they made everybody sound terrible. Maybe I have voice dysmorphia. Is that a word?

Yeah, I don't know. You can invent Dysmorphia is a word Dysmorphia is a word But like for voices Maybe And Maybe I don't sound The way I sound The way I think I sound I probably do It's not, Listen It's not for the weak If you're listening still It's been a year And you're still listening So You're a tough Person Yeah, What does that look? I saw, like, a bug go by, like, in the light, but it looked huge. Wait, are we fogging up the glass? No, it's frosted. Oh, okay.

Today years old. It just looked. Today years old. Today years old.

Okay, let's get into it. Okay, so today we are talking about the Salem Witch Trials. Wait, what? Spooky vats. Yay! So, this is, heads up, this is going to be a two-parter.

And normally I wouldn't do something like this. but I think that it's I think that it's like interesting right because like we've learned about I mean we briefly learned about it in like what seventh or eighth grade honestly it's one of those things where like information went in and immediately out so what please forgive me in advance I have briefly would go back and look up things about the Salem Witch Trials or read a book or two there and what was interesting looking back having experienced

the pandemic like a global pandemic going through coat like going through covid and the misinformation and the fear and then having like this really weird political climate oh my god there's a lot of parallels There's so many parallels. Not only that, but then there's also like religious zealotry that like you see in Gaza, elections coming up. There's like so many things that you like that set the stage for something awful like this to happen.

And while it might not necessarily be yoga or wellness related, I think that especially now the way with this like wellness to QAnon pipeline. How a lot of like yogis now are kind of these weird conspiracy theorists, it kind of very closely parallels kind of what happened. So I thought it would be interesting to kind of talk about the background of the trials first, and then next week we'll talk about the actual trials. Okay, I like it. So, Salem Witch Trials happened in 1692.

So this is the furthest back that we've ever gone. That is really far back. It is really far back. Yeah. It predates, you know. 17.

17. 17. 17. do you know that there's multiple instances in this entire story where I was like oh my god this is just like Hamilton and then I would be like oh wait completely different time period there's like a hundred years literal hundred years in between years in between and I was like oh oh um okay so Salem okay wait no so we're still in England we're still English are are they yeah I'm sure Or they still have... No, I think they've been... I think that...

Settlers had been here for about 100 years. So they had their own weird accents. Apparently, Salem has a weird accent. Oh, I'm into it. That's not like a Bostonian accent. It's what I've heard. I don't know. So the history of witch trials in general had been happening in Europe for centuries, 80% of those accused and executed were women, mostly over the age of 40. And the result of that was kind of institutionalized misogyny, socioeconomic turmoil, religious zealotry.

So someone would be like, oh, all my cows died. It must have been witchcraft. Oh, my God. And it must have been you. Like, what a fucking terrible time to live in. Well, you know, it could have been something like they got a virus or like something happened. That's what I'm saying. They have no idea. They don't have the knowledge.

Right. So all roads continue to just point at witchery yeah because they need a why they need an answer they need something to blame needs yeah want yeah answer so as christianity spreads it behooved governments to punish those who kept more pagan traditions to keep their subjects in line and to punish those who are outsiders and might challenge their authority so in more catholic regions burning at the stake was the preferred method oh my god they believed that

burning someone didn't spill their blood even though like i don't what what is it like yeah that's awful it's very bloody it doesn't spill it it boils it like it's disgusting their hand didn't take i don't know i think it was like they found they thought they found a loophole but it was like your loophole kind of ain't loophole no and your loophole is fucking like brutal burned alive yeah and people would like gather and like watch watch it yeah so weird but hanging was preferred by protestants

because it was seen as more modest because as a person was burned their clothes would burn with it and it's not enough that you're executing someone but you don't want to also see them you're nakey i didn't even know that. I just thought, like, literally don't even... I know zero about burning people with clothes on. I didn't even think of it. I know zero. Obviously, neither of us have burned people with clothes on. Think about titties. I didn't even think about bringing titties in that moment.

It really wasn't what I... Yeah okay even worse i think i thought you were gonna say that oh am i in my i was clearly watching hocus pocus when i put this because i said it says yabos yabos you won't see them yabos you want to see them yabos literally never crossed my mind that titties would be exposed once yeah and catholics give like zero shits about modesty really i thought they were gonna be like oh Oh, yeah. It's more humane. Burning someone? No, to hang them.

It's also not, though. I'd rather be hung. Yeah, but what about, what's that one guy, Yankee Jim, from the Whaley house? Well, he was really tall, and that was an exception. That's why he still haunts it to this day. That's why he tried to open the door on you, remember? No. So, by the time the Salem Witch Trials happened, or were, like, ramping up, witch trials had been waning in Europe. So they were already, like, finding reasons why a bunch of cows would have died.

People were kind of more falling in line. So cut to America being colonized by Europeans, seeking religious freedom from the English Catholic rule of King James II. I didn't know any of this. No. This was all new. Salem was part of the Massachusetts Bay Colony, who had a royal charter from the king that set up the rules and appointed government officials to aid in land disputes and uphold English law. So basically, at the time, they were like, there are rules set in place.

Like, even though you guys are your own thing, you're still a part of the British government. That's why I was like, oh, they're still from England. Yeah. So they're still a part. So you still have to obey these laws. English law and witchcraft at the time was that if someone was accused once, they would spend a year in prison. If they were accused a second time, they would be put to death. Jesus, that's a whole leap. That's a whole big leap. It's a whole leap.

But if you remember the witch trials, they're just like, nah, kill them immediately. Why give them an opportunity to live a whole year and cast spells? And up until this point, some of the women that had been accused, it was their second, like, accusation. That's crazy. But most of them— All it takes is the wind to shift for an accusation, though. Yes. So it was really hard to convict someone because it was a he-said-she-said kind of deal.

But also there was a penalty for falsely accusing someone. So to file a complaint, you would have to pay a bond. And if that person, they're like, oh, she's not a witch, you would forfeit that bond. Good. That stops everybody from just pointing the finger at anybody because then your livelihood is on the line. Because, you know, I don't know, everyone back there seemed to, like, have a shilling on hand or whatever. Yeah, yeah. It's probably more than I would have had, but yes.

So this royal charter that kind of set all these rules was vacated when King James was overthrown during the English Reformation and replaced with the Protestant Mary and William. Okay, so he's overthrown, there's a new king and queen, and there's no charter now. Uh-oh. Meanwhile, a war had broken out with the Wabanaki in present-day Maine, and many families have to flee and seek refuge down in Massachusetts. The Wabanaki is a Native American tribe? They are the Native people.

I know. And because Wabanaki were, like, pretty hardcore, they were doing, like, night raids. They were constantly living in fear. And so these people that fled had whole villages gone up by people that they only saw in the dark. and they're terrified and they have most likely very severe PTSD. Oh, I bet. I mean, it's terrifying, but also don't steal people's lands. So there's that.

There is that. There is that. A lot of this whole case is a lot about land disputes and it's a really hard pill to swallow. Did you notice, side note. Didn't we get Columbus Day off in previous times? Like, yeah, we did. We don't get Columbus Day off anymore at work. Well, now it's Indigenous Peoples Day. Exactly. And they're not, they're like, we're not celebrating that shit. We're not celebrating the day we stole the land from the Indigenous people.

I love that so much. Like, why are we going to celebrate? I mean, I still would like a day off. But maybe it could be like, let's celebrate Indigenous people. Yeah. By giving them a day off. I'll take that. I'll take that. But I just like, I like how they're like, wait a minute. We're not celebrating. Makes no sense. Yeah, we're not celebrating this bullshit. Okay, go ahead. So a new charter is negotiated by Increase Mather.

His name is Increase Mather. And I thought, whoa, that sucks for him. His name is Increase. He's not the only Increase in my research. Wait a minute. He didn't name back then. I think it's like the Jaden, Brayden, Aiden of the 17th century. Of the creases? Increase. Yeah. Yeah. But it was like the hotness? I guess. Were there different levels? Was there decrease? She-crease? I didn't see any other. Me-crease? Well, okay. There was like three

increases in this whole thing. That is so fucking crazy, though. I mean, it's a cool name. People out there naming. I mean, there are some wild names. Yeah. But Increase Mather. So Increase Mather. I don't know. He negotiates a new charter with William Phipps, who was considered a war hero in the Indian Wars that had—okay, wait, sorry. Oof. That's what they were called. I know. You've been reading it a lot. But with Native American— With Native Indigenous people.

So wars with Indigenous people. He was considered a war hero, which means he was probably a piece of shit. But he was installed as the governor of the Massachusetts Bay Colony, which was now expanded to include Maine. Phipps gave me originally big Trump energy. He was like really braggy and like just didn't do shit. However, did he create his own statistics and his own narrative? Kind of.

But his story his life story was so wild i was kind of like you kind of deserve you're like you i feel like you can make up deserve to like brag but he was like a shepherd he was a shepherd out in the fields like really poor uh-huh and like ran off to become a sailor and then becomes the captain of the ship like very so he is so he is created princess bridey yeah however he did not become like a dread pirate roberts but he came became more like the guy in the

second pirates of the caribbean that works for the british government that's hunting down pirates like the bad guy yeah he he was like that guy okay and so he also was known for finding sunken pirate treasure oh so he was like a legit adventurer yeah and then becomes this what they perceive it's a war hero. Huh? Think about this. Wrap your head around this for a second. This is a tangent. In that moment, they don't have scuba.

How the fuck do they know where these like sunken pirate treasures are? I don't know. Isn't that crazy? They either came across it or a map. Maybe there was a map. And then there was like, I don't know, ship manaships. But how do you get down that low in the water? And you know what I mean? I mean, it must have been. I mean, if this was a lot of people, a lot of this was in the Caribbean. So it would have been shallower. Okay. I'm just saying. It's pretty incredible.

I wonder how they, like if it was deeper. That's what I'm saying. That's probably a weird Channel Island or something. That's what I'm saying. I don't know. Maybe that's its own podcast. Because, yeah, they definitely were not for school boat back then. No, they were not for school boat. And so I'm like, wait a minute. How did they get down low? I don't know. Maybe it was like back in the day where they would like put like a bucket on their head to like trap the air.

And then they would like tie rocks on their ankles. You might be onto something. You might be onto something. I actually think that's a plot point in Paris of the Caribbean. Damn. I don't know. I haven't watched enough of them. I started getting, you know, after the first second, I'm like, yeah, no, I'm pretty sure it was the first. It's just really impressive. I'm just saying. It is. It's very, very impressive.

So he's also he is this famed ship captain who then they perceive as a war hero for, I don't know, doing whatever. Beating the native population from their own land. But as governor, he's like, you know what? I'm not going to really do much. So don't expect anything. Damn. I'm awesome. But just, like, do your own thing. Like, I really don't care. He's like, I've done all my cool shit up front. I'm just going to cruise from here on out. Yeah.

And then he hires all of his, like, rich, like, landowner buddies to be in roles in government. Oh, my eyes hurt from rolling so far backwards. Yeah. So, yeah. You know, you can kind of see how maybe someone who didn't qualify to be in a position of power then is in a position of power in Salem. Right. So there was kind of this like agreement with Increase Mather that they would kind of split power. And Increase could deal with like the colonies that already existed and kind

of deal like ruling in law and order there. And then he would worry about expanding their Massachusetts Bay Colony because now it includes Maine. He wants to go west. Okay. And steal more land. Usually. Yes. So Increase Mather and his son Cotton were like witch conspiracy theorists. I know. Also the name Cotton.

Cotton Mather. I feel like I've heard that name. Yeah, he's very famous. Although, like, for this. Oh! For this. So, okay. So maybe I did retain something. You probably did. Wow. Although I think he gets more credit. Like, I think that he definitely he feels like more of like a Rudy Giuliani in this situation where like he didn't actively do much other than like babble shit. OK. OK. What? I don't know why I'm comparing Cotton Mather to Rudy Giuliani.

That's where we just end up. You know, just like someone who just like really isn't worth anything. He's just like just worth zero. Zero. Bring zero to the table. Increase and Cotton were these, like, kind of witch conspiracy theorists. And in the decade leading up to the trials, each had written at least one book each about how witchcraft was a major threat to, like, souls and, like, America, the Americas and whatever. At the same time as all of this, right?

So that's, like, high government, like, kind of the political, like, air of what's happening. But in Salem, specifically, there was a turf war going on. Oh, snap. And at the time, it's what the region was known for. Like, it was like kind of a Hatfields and McCoy situation where, like, there was two families, the Putnams and the Porters. And if you were on either side and saw someone who backed them, you would, like, fight them in the street.

What? That is freaking brutal. That's, like, high stakes always. Like, no chill. Yeah. And, yeah, that's, like, basically what they were known for. Oh, that's stressful. With, like, being kind of crazy and being like, I'm going to fuck you up because you like the Putnams or you like the Porters. Yeah, find me in the woods away from that shit. Yeah. So when we talk about Salem, we are talking about Salem Town, which is present-day Salem, and Salem Village, which is Danvers, Massachusetts.

And a little town north of Salem called Topsfield. So there's a town. Side note, we're going to go visit them for your 40th birthday, yes? Yeah, and then Topsfield. Okay. All of this. And so as they're starting to create these towns, the borders start getting a little bit blurry. Blurry. And in an old survey, Salem Village was supposed to go up to a certain point. And then they were like, anything north of that is like common land.

But it forgot that Topsville existed. So it doesn't say anything about Topsfield in that one survey, but later it was rectified to be like, up until this point, this is Topsfield. So the Putnams owned a lot of land in Salem Village, and they were starting to creep on over into Topsfield land. And Topsfield was giving land to people that they were like, okay, here you go. You bought this land. Here you go. Sure. You can homestead. I'd say air quotes. Yeah, you can homestead. Yeah,

you can go homestead. And the Putnams were like, that's my land, bro. And they're like, no, it's not. And they were like, look at this old charter a long ass time ago. It is our land. And everyone's like, that charter has been wrong. Everyone knows it's wrong. Everybody knows that this has no, this holds no. Right. And they were like, oh, no. Yeah. So the Putnams were kind of the real pieces of shit in all of this. So they were successful farmers in Salem Village.

And they were very conservative. They didn't like new people popping up, and they didn't like people challenging them. And so they're in this, like, dispute with the town of Topsfield because they feel like they're on that land. And they're constantly losing because everyone's like, no, this clearly isn't your land. Right. Okay. The porters were like an up-and-coming new family and maritime merchants from Salem Town. Okay. This is a whole-ass town over. And they're a little bit more worldly and

a little bit more liberal. And that rubs the Putnam's the wrong way. Well, of course it does. They're like, oh, no, change. Oh, no, progression. So Salem Town and Salem Village were kind of the same town in the sense that the village paid taxes to the town. Because they were like, we're taking care of you out there.

That's where the church was, the meeting house. Citizens were expected to contribute to the night watch, which was, you know, what they did during the war to make sure no one came in the middle of the night. Oh, my gosh. Didn't even think of that. Yep. Uh-huh. But it was really far to get like on a horse and buggy to get all the way over to Salem Town. So they're like, why are we? They're like, why are we doing this? Can we just not pay those taxes to you and we just build our own shit? Yep.

And because what what's in it for them? Like at the end of the day?

Resources far and protection yeah right far so they were like they're come to this agreement they're like okay you guys can have your own club like your own clubhouse your own church or meeting and meeting house however like we will handle all like the bit like the big law enforcement stuff okay and the governing but and you don't have to come to night watch anymore and so they were like okay that's a happy medium that's okay for now so salem village builds a church and hire Samuel Parris.

Samuel Parris came from, okay, he did not have the same exact story. He was actually a plantation owner in Barbados and a hurricane. In Barbados? Yeah, a hurricane came and a hurricane came and dripping down the drain. Yeah, exactly that. And then he leaves. I know. I can't remember. Testament to his name. Yeah. He wrote his first refrain. I don't know. I can't remember. Testament to. Oh, you just said that. God, I did it backwards, I think. We haven't watched it in a while. Gosh.

Anyway, so he's from Barbados, or he's from England. Okay. Goes to Barbados, runs a plantation. A hurricane comes, fucks everything up. So then he leaves and comes back over to the colonies. Oh. With his, he has with him his daughter and his niece, Abigail Williams. And his two slaves, Tituba and John Indium. Damn. So keep that in mind. Obviously, they have more to deal with later.

Tituba and John Indium. So he is a very, like, fire and brimstone, very conservative preacher, and he doesn't get support from the porters, who are like, no. We don't want to pay this guy's salary because he's not a good hire. Like, I don't support. No. And so this pissed the Putnams right off. And Paris is kind of caught in the middle because this was also during the most freezing time.

So not only is it winter, but it's what they call the Little Ice Age where it was like an unusually cold winter. So it was like very cold. It was like colder a lot sooner and like very frigid a lot later. And so he has no wood. Because you need money for that. No heat. And he has two young girls who he's in charge of. Oh. Don't feel that bad for him. Okay, take it back. Bit. So in about February of 1962, Betty Paris, his daughter, she's about nine. You said 1960?

Did I say 1962? Mm-hmm. Oh, my God. My notes say 1962. It's 1692. Oh, yeah. Okay, dyslexia. Not 1962. Yeah, I know. I was reading my notes, right? My notes were just wrong. Okay, so Betty Paris, she's nine. Abigail, her cousin, she's 11. They start having fits. And what they consider fits is screaming, throwing things, contorting themselves and like crawling under furniture.

And Paris sends for a doctor who's like there's nothing wrong with them it must be witchcraft stop it because they're just throwing fits it's witchcraft yeah not that they're bored not that they're going through puberty puberty exactly because they're going through these mega changes anyone else has been around nine to eleven year old no they suck sometimes but Shit is crazy. Especially girls. That sounds just like contorting themselves, throwing shit, crawling under

furniture. That sounds like a regular Tuesday. Yeah. Yeah. Literally. Literally. Where it's like, oh, okay. And you know, I would say he doesn't, I don't think he has like a wife with him or anything who would be like, hey, this is normal. Hey, I remember what that felt like. But yeah, so he, he. Dang, where's wife?

They're just losing their shit. honestly i don't know yeah probably maybe in that hurricane yeah hurricane came she went just what happened to hamilton's testament to left him with his cousin oh she fell ill she fell ill they both fell ill but she his mother went quick yeah maybe that's that situation maybe that's what that happened so a neighbor marry sibley which is also wild okay this this to me is like wild so a neighbor, Mary Sibley, she tries to get the bottom of it.

And with the help of Tituba and John Indian, bakes a thing called witch cakes. It is a mixture of pea and flour fed to a dog. Stop. Pea of the girls. So the girls had to like pee somewhere. They mixed the pea with flour and then fed these cakes to a dog. And then the dog was to tell them who bewitched the girl. What the fuck? So that they could confront them. How did they even make this up? It's like old-timey, like, old-timey, like, witchy things were,

like, kind of normal back then. It was like old home remedies. But that's just so, like, out of, like, nowhere... Here, pee in this here bucket. Mixing bowl. Let's mix it with some flour, feed it to some dogs, and they'll tell us what's going on. Like, who thinks that? Like, who, how do you get there? How does one land there? I don't know, very simply, but Tichuba and John Indian were like, all right, let's do it. This is how we roll.

But they were also, so Tichuba and John Indian, though they are recorded as being, quote, Indian, they believed that they were indigenous. They were not indigenous. They were most likely from South America. So they probably had like their own kind of like folklore and that they were like, yeah, sure. Let's try this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Paris finds out and he is pissed, like so pissed. So he expels Sibley from the church and she's never accused of witchcraft.

Spoiler alert. I don't know how this lady just homer-ed into the bush and was never to be accused by anybody. Okay. She's like, I'm going to find a radar and fly under it. Yeah, which is so wild. So anyway, the fits get worse, and the girls claim to be pinched and poked by some unseen force. And oddly, the girls in town start displaying the same behavior. They're like, I see what you're doing. And let me get in on it. Oh, hey, let me jump in. Let me jump in on it. Let me, let me, let me, let me.

Yes, and. Yes, and. Yes, and. Yes, and. So Ann Putnam Jr. was 12 and Elizabeth Hubbard was 17, which is too old for that shit. Okay, because you've already been there, done that. It's already, it's happened. Yeah. So together, the girls accuse Sarah Good, Sarah Osborne, and Tituba as being witches and for torturing them. I have no idea, like, why they were like—I honestly think that very similar to the Fox sisters, I think that they did something—like, they didn't want to

get in trouble. And someone's like, who's doing this? Who's doing this? And they were like, oh, that person. That guy. Just whoever was closest in vicinity. Yeah. What the fuckage? But. a lot of the people that they end up, Accusing happened to be in land disputes with the Putnam. Oh, that's convenient. Sarah Good and Tituba were very low-hanging fruit. Okay. So Sarah Good, she was 39 at the time, was an unhoused pregnant woman.

Unhoused pregnant woman? Well, it's a lot kinder than what they said about her. I bet.

So she was an unhoused pregnant woman who would take her daughter door-to-door begging for food, which she would often be like turned away and then she'd get really pissy about it which pissed people off and then even when they did give her food she'd be like well motherfuckers or like whatever oh my god so she was not a beloved person no in the town so it just feels like really, low-hanging fruit right right right right right her husband was also a super

big piece of shit Wait, she had a husband during this moment? She had a husband. And a daughter. She had a four-year-old daughter. Yeah. So her husband was also a piece of shit, and he would go around town telling people that she was a witch because she was always irritated with him.

Probably he sucked too. Yeah, and she would, like, constantly, like, I don't know, embarrass him, I guess, with, like, her demeanor. I mean. She didn't fit the expectation of, like, Puritan, like, ideals of life. Or, like, the whatever. So, very clearly, probably going to be the first ones, like, accused as a witch. Yeah, yeah. Tituba, who was, like, very young at the time. I think she was, like, in her early 20s. Was a slave who came over with the Paris family from Barbados.

But was most likely originally from South America, where they had also kidnapped a lot of people from South America. And brought them over to make, like, weave hand goods. So they were, like, more of a craftsperson servant. I just can't get—I can't with us just going everywhere and stealing people. It's wild. Crazy. So the town, there's been this, like, huge debate about what her ethnicity is. And a lot of times, because she's called a slave, people assume that she's black.

But in the records she's recorded as being quote indian which she's probably like hispanic of some sort or like which what people think they don't they don't have any idea of what well there's like she's brown we gotta find something right indigenous so again one of the only people of color in a town who doesn't see kindly so that is also again very low hanging fruit because Because people were racist as fuck back then.

So the reason why John Indian, her husband, is named John Indian is because they believed he was, quote, Indian, like an indigenous person. OK. I was wondering, I was like, what an interesting name. There was also another woman who was involved in the trials named Mary Black. And she was also a slave of African ancestry. John Indian Mary Black. So that's just kind of like how they distinguished at the time. like what sort of other you were, which is like...

I don't know, wild to me. Sarah Osborne. Okay. She is 49. So she's the third woman that's accused. She is kind of a weird pick for their first batch. Yeah. She was the sister-in-law of Captain John Putnam. And when her husband dies, almost immediately, she marries their indentured servant. Who is Irish. So they're just mad at her. Yeah. That's fucked up. So he's an Irish guy.

Named alexander osborne i i thought it was very also weird i thought it was also very weird i also thought it was very weird he's always referred to her as an indenture servant like never the husband or so she had to un-indenture him though to marry him but i guess this was not cool her husband's will also stated that he wanted his two sons to inherit their 150 acre farm but they weren't of age yet so sarah was like well i gotta keep things running yeah

so she takes over to keep providing for herself her new husband and her sons her sons did not like that so they go to their uncle john get him involved and there's this huge loss could you imagine my kids my jamo and shepherd turning against me because i'm trying to keep shit running yeah Fucked up. Yeah. So the lawsuit is this huge ordeal, but then the royal charter is revoked.

And not much can be done to settle the issue. So there's just this, like, festering land dispute because the Putnams are trying to get Sarah's land from her to give to her sons. And she's like, no, because then it would be in the Putnams' hands. Right. So she had not been doing well and hadn't been seen around in years. She hadn't been to church in like three years. And a lot of people say that or it was she said it was because she was sick,

but it was often suspected that it was from stress and depression from the lawsuit. Yeah. Because that's that's a lot. Yeah, that's a lot. Essentially, all of your people, your family included, they're all turning against you. Yeah. And trying to steal your rightfully owned land. Yeah. So the three women were interrogated for days and sent to jail. And it wasn't, like, nice conditions. No, I'm sure it was like, clink, clink. There's a cold floor with pee on it.

Oh, yeah. I don't, yeah. I think everyone just peed and pooped on the floor. Yeah. It was gross. So Sarah Good, the unhoused pregnant woman. Unhoused pregnant woman. Was loud and was like, I'm not a witch, but these two bitches might be. She's like, you got the wrong one. She's like, but these ones. Nani, though. See, it's just that it's like that nature of like pointing fingers at somebody else to save yourself. Right. Right. Tituba lays everyone out to dry. Sarah Osborne doesn't say anything.

She's just like depressed as fuck. Yeah. But Tituba lays everyone out. And most likely because Paris had beat the living shit out of her the night before. And so she's like. Earth Scorch. Yeah. The devil came to me. Oh my god Did something happen and she's like no no And they're like something did and she's like you're right The devil came to me And he bid me to serve him and you know I'm a slave so I can't say no To any person of authority so You really can't blame me,

Which is crafty as fuck. Yeah, that is crafty. How could you pay me? I had to. Because I'm not, you know, I don't have the same rights as everyone else. I have to do what he says. And so she says that the master instructs her, like, instructs her to do all this stuff. And that there was, the devil had a book and it had other names in it. And they were like, how many? And she's like, nine, 13. And she's like, yeah, there's people here. There's people in Boston.

There's like men and women and animals. And like, everyone's in on it. and they were like what else and then she like looks off into the distance she goes oh i'm blind, i'm blind now immediate i'm blind i can't see oh no uh i think i'm blind and i i don't know oh my god that is so fucking good she's like oh i'm blind mid-sentence i feel like when my kids come to ask me things, that's going to be like, oh, my new go to. I'm blind. I'm blind. It's between I'm blind and I'm on voice rest.

Sorry. No can do's will. So later that month, more women are accused of witchcraft and the investigation expanded to include a physical exam in which they looked for moles and birthmarks on the body that could indicate the devil had marked them or an extra nipple so that they could feed their familiars. Oh my God. Because they were known to like suckle, I don't know. Have a third nipple? Are third nipples that common? I don't know.

I feel like a lot of people have them. I mean, someone probably, there had not been a single person who had one in Salem. They did say at one point, oh, we found third nipple on somebody. And they're like, but the next time we saw it, it was gone. It was gone. It was probably like a zit. Literally. That is so funny. I know. It was a zit. Most definitely was a zit with that hygiene. That 17th century hygiene. That dirty ass. No antibacterials. Yeah. So that month...

Martha Corey, 72, very pious woman, but she had a mixed-race son out of wedlock. She's 72 years old? Yeah, she's 72 years old. No, no, she didn't just have this kid. He was an adult. No, no, no, I'm just saying people don't live that long back in the day, so get it. Oh, yeah, no, there's a lot of elderly. Get it, lady. In this. Yeah. So, yeah, so she had a mixed-race son out of wedlock when she was really young and was, like, really open about it.

Good. And she also was like, this is bullshit, these girls are lying. And so the girls were like, Kari's a witch. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Yeah. She went in to it like, yeah, sure, I'll testify because she thought truly. She's like, I've got nothing to hide. And the truth will sort of list out. No. No. Girls would scream. They would be like, she's poetry. There's a devil on her shoulder. She's like, Oh, God. The theatrics. And she ends up going to jail. Shit. Rebecca Nurse, 71.

Neighbors were shocked because she was very, very pious. Always at church. What is happening? They're taking out all the elderly's? She was accused of cursing some pigs. Oh, not the pigs. And then they died. Yeah, I guess some pigs trespassed on her property, and then like months and months later, they died. Oh, no. And they were like, it was very like get off my lawn energy. And then they were like, she must be a witch. She must have cursed them.

So then she comes to court with a petition signed by 39 prominent neighbors that she was not a witch. And it's interesting to know. That's a lot. That earlier, Nurse had also been in a land dispute with the Putnams. There you go. And that also her family was responsible for a ruling keeping the Putnams from land up north in Topsfields. Can you imagine? She was also best friends with Elizabeth Porter. Okay. Bullshit. Can you imagine? Bullshit. It's some bullshit.

Can you imagine your family going to war with this other family over land, but turning it into something else so fucking that it's spoken about for centuries to come? It's wild. Yeah. Rachel Clinton, which sounds like a name from like the 90s. Yeah. I don't know. Rachel Clinton, she was 63. She was just kind of like a loud mouth who was really poor from a nearby town. And she was accused of being a shapeshifter who could turn into a dog. Or a turtle. Oh, a turtle?

Honestly, I wasn't going to include a lot of what they were accused to. It's just so ridiculous, but you have to. But like if someone is saying they're shapeshifting into a turtle, I'm going to have to fucking hear. I mean, my God, let's talk about it. Yeah. Dorothy Good was accused but confessed to being a witch because she was four years old. Four? Four. She was the daughter of Sarah Good. Less than a hand. And she's saying, yes, I am a witch. Yeah, they were like, you're a witch,

right? And she was like, yeah. If I'm a witch, if you're a witch, I'm a witch. Like. Yeah. Well, those kids were like nine. That is the saddest shit. Yeah. Four years old. Younger than the Jack Jack. Younger than the Shepherd. Like Harper. It's the Harps. Disgusting. Disgusting. so at this point more people are jumping on the bandwagon more girls are joining into like the.

Accusers because also i think that there's this fear that unless you're pointing a finger a finger is gonna get pointed at you so it's like who can point the finger faster and be more like convincing yeah so moving on to april because this has only been a month and a half wait Wait, this whole thing? This whole thing has been a month and a half long so far. Oh. All those people. So in April, 21 more people are accused.

Jails can't hold them anymore. Wait, who's forking up all of this money for these bonds to accuse people? The royal charter has been vacated. So there are no wrongs. It's a free-for-all. You're right. It's a free-for-all. Okay, okay, okay. So there's no law saying anything right now. Right. So the new charter hasn't even started yet. Like, it's not even in place. They're in the process of negotiating it. Yeah. Negotiating it. So the jails can't hold everybody.

And there are all sorts of different areas. And this is where John Hawthorne and Jonathan Corwin get involved. The two judges that are like most closely associated with the witch trials. And they start hearing complaints in Salem Town. And I can't, we don't have all that time to go over all 21 people that were just accused, that were just accused, that were accused. That were accused. Just being accused fucked your life up.

Right. But the most popular you probably hear about are Giles Corey, who was 81, the husband, Martha Corey. Uh-huh. And he was kind of like a rascal and used to be a petty thief and like was very cantankerous. They were probably just like picking people that they were just not wanting around anymore. They're like, we need to get rid of this person. We need to get rid of that person. Yeah. So he actually had been arrested for murder before. Oh, snap.

Incidentally, he had beat his farm worker to death. But because the farm worker had stolen an apple or something, he got away with just a fine because corporal punishment. it was legal. Jesus Christ. Yes. And so when Martha Corey gets arrested, this like kind of pisses me off. He's like, what? Is she a witch? Like they'd only been married two years or something. His own wife. And so he was like, oh, what? I can't. Oh, what? Is she really a witch? But then someone was like, Charles Corey's

a witch. And he was like, oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Now I see what's happening. Yeah, hello. He was accused by Mary Warren, an 18-year-old, who was a servant for Elizabeth and John Proctor. Mary Warren was also accused because she was part of the mob accusing, and then she admitted that they were lying, and that didn't sit well with the other girls. Oh, my God. So they accused her of witchcraft. So messy. And then they put the pressure—like—,

I don't know. It's fucking insane. So they put pressure on her, and then she confesses to being a witch and says that she did so because she was forced to by the Proctors. So both Elizabeth and John Proctor were also accused. Oh, my God. And the Proctors were another notable family in the community. I was going to say I know that name. Elizabeth was pregnant, and John was only accused for standing up for her when he was like, she's obviously not a witch. And they were like,

well, then you must be one, too. God. See, that's the thing. What a time to be alive. That, like, is ridiculous. That just—the wind can shift, and you're a witch. They are also related to Rebecca Nurse, who is best friends with Elizabeth Porter and who was in a land dispute with the Pet Noms. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Bridget Bishop, who was 60, who I just am obsessed with.

She was tavern owner who wore bright and exotic clothes and there's a quote that says she wore black clothing and odd costumes which was against the puritan code when she was examined before her trial bishop was asked about her coat which had been awkwardly cut and torn in two ways which is like giving me like such like tim burtony like yeah like i love it you're creating your own shit. So Bridget Bishop was 60. Her husband was 44. Okay, get it.

She was cougaring hard. Get it, Bridget. She was cougaring before they were cougaring. The other girls also accused her of harming them with just a quick glance. And do I want that power more than anything? And they just... That is what my entire motherhood heard during... I'm literally, I'm like, wanting my kids to have a reaction. Yeah. Nothing. That's where I've been, like what I've been steadily working for. I know one person who has that power.

Christine, my sister-in-law, she can look at her kids and they immediately, like, they can tell. Yeah. They cry. You know what? I don't lay down the law hard enough. I don't either. I'm just a bitch. Don't mean much, but I'm getting there slowly. Yeah. You know, it's not that I want my kids to be fearful. I just want that respect. I do. I want my kids to be fearful of me, but they're not. They laugh in my face. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha.

Oh, man. I got locked out. I'm going to hold on. okay there we go mary esty was 58 she happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time shit she was in court when she clasped her hands together while listening to her sister rebecca nurse on trial and mercy lewis one of the afflicted girls starts mimicking her like also clasping her hands and she's like i can't stop because she's bewitched she's making She may clasp my hands.

Yeah, I can't stop until she stops. And then so she unclasps her hands. So she does. So she's copying everything. Just like raising the asterisks. And then she's like, oh my gosh. Oh my God, to be Rebecca Nurse. She just came over here and touched my boob. To be Rebecca Nurse. What? Yeah. She goes, oh, she just came over here and touched my boob. And Judge Hawthorne. It's so ridiculous. Judge Hawthorne was like, are you sure? Yeah.

Which up until this point, you know, Hawthorne and Corwin, And they're like, fuck, yeah, let's burn some witches. Right. Hang some witches. Let's say Europe. But he was like, are you sure? Are you sure? He's like, wait, hold on. This is where I draw the like. This is where I start to question. Because up until then, just like her sister, Rebecca, she was a very pious person, upstanding citizen in Salem. And so she's released. But then the girls were like, you know what?

Actually, we are sure. And they arrested her and put her in jail. Are you serious? Dead serious. I'm telling you. You know what? Change of heart. Yeah. More confirmation just out of nowhere. Maybe just like, yeah, a little bit more. Yeah. A little bit more. God. Sarah Cloyce was 51, also the sister of Rebecca Nurse. I'm telling you, to be Rebecca Nurse, like, that must suck. Yeah. You're the literal reason. Rebecca Nurse is, like, an invalid old woman.

She, like, can't even hear right. Yeah. And, like, her sister, her younger sisters are going down, which, whew. But Sarah Cloyce had accidentally let a door slam behind her leaving church. And they thought she was in league with the devil. Oh, that's why. It wasn't like the wind. No. It was just the wind. That old tiny building. Right. So, yeah. So she also goes, Reverend George Burroughs, a reverend. He was a huge guy, like a really big, strong guy.

And they were like, there's no way his strength can be human. He's a witch. Yeah. That's witchcraft. He also was suspected of secretly being a Baptist. Because he hadn't baptized his kids. He also owed the Putnam's money. Okay. There's convenience. There's convenience outlining everything. Yep. So this brings us to May, which brings us almost to the end of this one episode. So May warrants for 40 more people come in. 40? 40 more people. And they're just investigating, quote, investigating and

holding people in jail. But at this point, it's been months. It's been since February or since March. Yeah. Since March 1st.

And so in May, 40 more warrants come in for people. First death is May 10th, 1692. I did the date right. 1692. Sarah Osborne dies in jail. Sarah Osborne? The one that was depressed. Wait, she dies in jail? Yeah, the one that was, like, depressed because her sons were stabbing her in the back to get that Putnam Lands. Yeah. So things are starting to get out of hand. So. How does she die? Bad conditions. Like shitty conditions. Like probably froze.

Yeah. Probably lived in pee and poop. It was an unusually cold spring. Yeah. But it was like malnourishment. Yeah. Just really poor conditions. Scurvy, not eating well. So she dies in jail. And then things are getting really out of hand. So, armed with the new royal charter, Governor William Phipps orders the establishment of the Special Court of Oyer Interminer, which means to hear and determine. Oh. And this is to handle the backlog of witchcraft cases.

He appoints William Stoughton. He is a politician, a landowner, and kind of a real son of a bitch. And he's appointed as lieutenant governor, and he lets him oversee the court. But by the end of the month, 62 people were still being held in jail. Jesus, that is so many people. Just June 2nd, 1692.

Got it right again. I got it right again. I get it. The court of Oyer and Terminer convenes for the first time, and it ends up being responsible for the deaths of 20 people and dozens more that laid out in jail for months and months and months.

And just like the other— And that is the beginning of the Salem witch trial. That is fucking crazy. All right. Buckle up your bootstraps, y'all. There's more. But wait, there's more. But wait, there's more. You know what we should have done? We should have gotten our witch hats out.

I have it. and it's you know have you seen it doesn't fit your head have you seen the size of my head did you know I put on that hat and I immediately was like this is gonna fit you no it sure does not it fits me perfectly but my head is the size of the key I'm gonna put it on and attach a lot there's gonna be a lot of attachments happening there's gonna be holes that are poked yeah bobby pins that are inserted like we're gonna figure it out yeah but

it's gonna be a whole thing it's cute hat yeah it's cute though right okay all right so get your spooky i was gonna say spooky dookie get your spooky dookie hats pull them out of your closet t hats out for next week when we'll talk about the actual trial and it's really sad, and it's really sad it's really sad so but yeah until next week until next week thanks for. Music.