#237 - Le Male Elixir by JPG

Hello everybody , welcome to a brand new episode of the Cologne podcast .

I'm Mike and I'm Ryan and we're two best friends . We're going on a fragrance adventure , smelling fragrances , giving you an uneducated opinion .

Yeah , and it might sound a little different for a couple of reasons we got some new gear . Yeah , we have officially moved this out to the big living area here .

Yes , the big studio living area yeah .

And if you're a subscriber to our Patreon , you see what's going on behind the scenes right now . That is true , we gave them a little tease . We're building something , so it might sound a little echoey , echoey , echoey right now , but I think that'll get fixed .

So right now we are working on a mobile unit , and if you're a patron , you know exactly why this is mobile because of a separate podcast . We give you that you can listen to . That's not anywhere else , yeah .

Yeah , it's not anywhere else . And if you go there , but we're going to do our first 10 episodes there , right , then we'll put it out there for the masses , okay .

Well , let's keep this conversation going about Patreons because we've got a patron who just won something . Oh , okay , yeah .

I forgot . We're announcing it right here , right now Same time , same place . Doug , that's right , doug . What's up , dougie ?

Yeah , dougie boy , thanks for being a Patreon . You just won a partial bottle of .

Rouse Club Parfum . Big thanks again to Markovermufferingandsamplescom . He's helping make that happen . Once a month he's helping us give away a partial bottle from whatever he decants to put out there , you know , yeah . So , doug , you're going to get that , we're going to get in touch with you , get your address and we might come and visit you ?

No , but we will . We will mail this out for you . We've actually got a message from Doug . We'll read later . Yeah , not right now , ryan , because I'm going to read you a Fragrantica review of the fragrance that we're doing on today's episode .

Oh God , I know people are waiting for it .

Yes , that's right . So if you tuned in to hear what we think about Lamal Elixir , I'm going to tell you what Sefer Skater has to say about it . Mm-hmm , smells so extremely cheap , like in Playboy fragrance . We actually do have a really cheap Playboy fragrance . We've waited forever to do an episode on .

I had the greatest intro idea for it .

Mm-hmm .

And then he got canceled . Yeah , I don't think people want to do it . I don't know . I think it would have been funny , though .

Well , we're still going to do the fragrance . That episode sure to be full of hilarity , so yeah , so they just think it smells like a cheap , cheap , cheap Playboy fragrance is what they think . I saw that actually , multiple review said that that it smells like a cheap Playboy fragrance . Yeah , specifically Playboy fragrance . You're bullshit , I swear on my life .

He just died . No , that is such an odd yes Conclusion for people to come up with that don't know each other . I haven't smelled a single Playboy fragrance , yeah that's the other thing I was going to bring up . It's like what fragrances are you all keeping around ?

your house man ? Yeah , they're like . This is terrible . It reminds me of all my Playboy fragrances . I already don't trust your .

So is this going to smell like wet towels or something we're ?

about to find out . Okay , but first we got to go back in time , Ryan . We got to talk about Aaron Terrence Hughes . Onyx hit the music Todd yeah .

One night stand review . Well , Mike , after figuratively staying the night with Aaron Terrence , he is yeah , that's overseas . So , yeah , I couldn't really make that one . Well , it is Whatever you had a little .

We have connections , though we could have possibly made it happen .

Yeah , you know I'd pay to see that episode . So you flying over to good old London , yeah . I won't do it because I don't fly .

But yeah , we're trying to figure out , since explore and Ryan's like backing down every alleyway trying to figure out how not to fly . Just worry , the whopping two and a half hour flight to New York .

I have the weird . You know what you know . So the other day I actually messaged you this is going to sound random at first . I messaged Mike . I was like man , wouldn't it be great to get a job with like the Dallas Cowboys like media team and work for them for like a year or two , because you have it on your resume ? That's bad ass , right ?

And it's not like they're all driving around on a tour bus . They'd have to fly .

That's correct . But my weird theory is that I would actually feel protected going with the team because , oh my God , the whole team is not going to go down . They're going to make sure that plane is going to land .

Oh my , God Ryan for real . I'm dead serious dude , Good God .

But if it's just me and you two plebians getting on a plane , who fucking knows where that thing goes ?

Look nobody wants a plane to go down . They're not just going . Ok , well , we've got to let one hit the ground . It can't be the Cowboys . Is Ryan on a flight anywhere ?

Yeah , make sure that one goes down the other part of it is I'm always like I don't wish a plane crash to ever happen . But I'm always like , oh one , just you know , it like barely took off the runway and had a little mishap . I'm like , cool , now they're going to be tightening up restrictions and now they'll be safe . I'd probably fly then after that .

The statistics of people dying just driving every day . It is one of the most dangerous things you can do .

I don't know your life . Look , I bet you more people have and you're like driving with your knee .

You're lighting a cigarette and you're , you know , finishing up a Popeye sandwich . Look .

I bet you seriously . Statistically we could probably prove that more people have died choking on a hot dog than , like , dying in a plane crash 100% .

Good Lord . Well , let's talk about Onyx , for example , which wasn't a brutal wreck , but actually a beautiful fragrance .

God , that thing . I don't get the hate for it . I don't either . Well , let me take the back . I don't get why there was some hate for it .

Well , specifically , the user that we pulled up is a very popular fragrance reviewer .

I didn't know . It was until after the show . I didn't either , and they're , oh , you didn't know either , mm-mm . Okay , so we weren't taking shots then . No , no , no .

I am now , though . I don't trust the guy . Oh my God , there's something personal going on there . For real , you can't tell me you smell that fragrance . Could you smell anything that this guy was saying about it ? Well , the whole like , so , like pissing their pants . Yeah , the whole thing . It was like it was a grandmother's perfume that smelled terrible .

I don't know . So a lot of people can't be as . Are you going to kick our fucking wheels around ? A lot of people can't be as funny as I'm not going to say that . I kind of want to say this and if it needs to get deleted , delete it , todd .

Oh , specifically , let's just say it that way , we're not creating cryptic messages either . As a fragrance reviewer , you have to click a box that says if you buy this fragrance , yeah , that you're not allowed to make content on it , yeah it's so weird .

I mean , look , if he hears this podcast , I doubt it , but if he hears it , I really think man just let people say what they want to say , because we've , honestly , we've had a couple of people send us stuff of his , and I think there may be one that I was coming and wasn't into that much , but there was this one on it , which is amazing .

I loved it .

All this to say Mr Aron Tarrant . She was , if you listen . We have no connections for affiliations with this guy , but if you listen somehow to this episode , take that dumb shit down .

Because one people are going to say what they're going to say either way , like fragrance weirdo on fragrance . I mean surely there was no agreed upon thing to where he was just like , oh , I'll totally be cool . And then , yeah , he was clearly trying to be an asshole .

Hey , for real , it lost a sale because I was going to buy the 10 mil decant sale of Onyx and of Onyx Extreme before we were blessed enough to have some people send it to us Right .

Yeah , because I came back talking about how great it smelled and we really wanted to buy and do an episode on it . Because you wanted to smell it . I did . I wanted you to smell it . I wanted to smell it . What did you think about it ? It's incredible .

I really did like it and it lasted a long time . I loved the dry down on it . It was a good smell . I loved it .

Yeah , smell amazing . Did not smell Again . Here's the issue that I have , and I'm just going to go on a tangent . Maybe he actually believes this I'm talking about fragrance , weirdo now . Maybe he actually believes what he typed , but I don't think he does . You don't ? No , a guy who smelled that many fragrances can smell Onyx .

I don't know . I don't necessarily feel that , because I'm going to actually defend him here for a second . Okay , okay , this is the dumbest thing , but who cares ? No , I love it . So I'm going to play Mr , what Mike loves to do . He loves to play devil's advocate all the time he's fucking .

Well , look , we rarely get to interact with drama . You know , we rarely cross streams with drama . So now I'm like hey , let's talk about it a little bit .

Okay , so to position this , you said it was a huge hit in Milan . All the women loved it . They were smelling , chris , like oh my God , chris , you smell incredible Men and women .

To be fair , our whole traveling group . We had a pretty large group of us that were kind of bouncing around from different place to place .

Yeah , Mike came back with a jar . He said I captured some of Chris's essence in it . You want to smell it For sure , yeah . So you said it smells good . And then you have this guy who says that it's it's dog water .

The biggest piece of trash he's ever smelled .

Well , I mean , how popular is aqua deezio and aqua deezio perfume and you fucking hate it ? Yeah , you're right , I'm gonna go out onto that opinion . You know what I'm saying . Maybe you're the asshole , mike .

I can agree with that . Look , we've had plenty of people ride in and go Ryan , he's cool , mike he's an asshole . I can totally get behind

I think some people in the emails still I don't . I'm saying this like we get a lot . We've only gotten like two total emails or messages . That's something about not liking Mike , yeah , but it's like I think some people just don't understand our friendship and understand that we really are rough on each other .

You save it for like no one's around , no one could be recording . You give me tons of shit , but if anybody's around , you're like oh yes , sir , right away , sir .

There is some truth to that .

I'm not going to lie . Yeah , you play the sweet innocent but in reality you're like fragrance weirdo . You're an asshole .

All right , you're ready to smell this scent of the day that's been sent to us so graciously from Mark and actually Chris from Fragmentals . He sent us a sample of it too when he sent us a whole bunch of stuff .

Yeah , he did . So let's break down the story . When we first heard about it , Chris had a bottle of it . It wasn't available that we knew of in the US , and so Chris offered to send us one .

Hit us with that fucking juice dude . You first , please , my friend , all right here we go , I'm going to get real wild with it , just saying .

We got a lot .

Oh Lord , christmas over there . I had it pointed the wrong way to Charlotte with a mic , god damn it . Oh , it's loud . Huh , feeling like a playboy over there . It smells good , it's pleasant , mm . Hmm , the one thing that I'm missing , and I guess maybe I need to like paint the picture different in my head and what I should be expecting .

It kind of has a spice bomb vibe to it yeah .

If it does have an original LeMol thing , just like with anything else , when their concentration gets so deep , yeah , like in Elixir , yeah , like you lose a lot of those up top pretty parts of the fragrance . So there's a reason why I don't really care for that .

Everybody's doing Elixirs now . I hate it , I fucking hate it , I hate it .

It's coming out Intense or Elixir it's the big names and fragrances now .

Yeah , it's just one of these things . It's a marketing ploy , god damn it . We've been complaining about the intense thing for a while . What is ? If you're going to use the word intense , what does it actually mean ? And our friend , chris Fragmental , made a cool video a few days ago , really Of like . Are you tired of hearing the word intense ?

Without the intense verbiage in it , I guess .

I think some of them were Elixir , some of them were this , but it was like , hey , this is actually giving you your intense money's worth .

This is such a weird fragrance to me , like on my skin . Oh my God , it's starting to smell like Play-Doh over here . What the fuck ?

Not Playboy , but Play-Doh . Yeah , what the ?

fuck , Is it me ? Does it smell my skin bro ?

No , it's got kind of a super salty . Yeah , almost kind of like if your name was fragrance weirdo and you wet your pants .

I am not trying to start drama over here .

I'm not and you used your . I will not let this podcast be that . I hate shit like that I can't help it . It just felt like a cheap shot . Oh my God , let it go . I can't , let it go . I can't . I'm trying , it bothers me and look , I don't even know , erin , but it just felt like a cheap shot .

Yeah , I'm not liking it .

I'm not liking it On the skin . It's having a kind of too salty kind of . You get what I'm going you get where I'm headed with . Yeah very wet towel vibe right , yeah , Like if you wet the towel you know what I mean . This thing .

God , I'm seriously

Well , this guy came up with one-on-by-night right .

Yeah , and you know what's funny is there's just a little bit of that in this . Like you can smell , like some of that DNA . You know what I'm saying ? That's the thing with God .

You know that's what I'm kind of man . Because it's a little muggy in here , I'm trying to give it the benefit of the doubt . Is it because we're having just the tiniest clammy beads of sweat happening out here ? No , so we don't have any AC or fan or anything going on . I don't believe that .

These people might be right with this cheap Playboy scent shit . It smells kind of cheap , it doesn't .

What about on the card , though , the Chester Strip ?

It smells like again , like maybe the bottom half of something like Stetson or something right ? No , really , that's what I'm kind of getting .

I kind of get that one-on-by-night spice bomb sweet spicy man , I don't get spice bomb .

I can't throw spice bomb in the mix of this .

Well , no , no , no , I would much rather have the spice on EDT than this . For sure , it may have some potent power , but the issue with it is on my skin it smells a little , a little fucky . Maybe that would be the word I would go with . These are merely opinions , ladies and gentlemen , that's right . Yeah , don't get upset and be like .

Hey , for real , let's kind of dial it back . Let's talk about the bottle . It looks beautiful , it's a beautiful bottle . Another example of a beautiful bottle wasted on a fragrance , you know . This isn't a bad fragrance , by the way .

The bottle is your Lamal sculpted jacked , beautiful masculine physique .

Yes , with a package Uh-huh and it's all .

Gold , yeah , and stripes on the bottle that I think in pictures they look black , but I think it's actually to where you can see the juice in the bottle through the striped areas .

It looks good . The trend is pretty damn good for this thing , which is shocking , and not because I think it's putting its 500 pound body piggybacking on the frail 100 pound body that is the original LeMol name and getting out there and making some waves .

Yeah , lemol really isn't that popular . The original LeMol isn't super popular ?

It isn't . It isn't . It's known , but it's like I don't know .

I love it , nobody's wearing it I used to wear the shit out . You know it smells great . It really grew on me . I was like you left your bottle up here . I would always spray it .

Dude the original LeMol . It kicks the fucking door in on this thing .

Cause that was Kirk John , right , yes , actually , yeah , okay , yeah . And now they're pulling in the B players . I don't want to say that , I'm just kidding .

No , the gentleman's name is Quentin Bish and he's the perfumer for this . He has done some crazy good stuff . He did some parfum de marley . Yeah , he's done .

Wanted by night , obviously yeah .

So it's like there's some big hitters he's made and congratulations to that guy . We're not tearing this thing down and saying this guy doesn't know what he's doing . Obviously there's some art to this . They know what they're doing . Is it the stuff that we care for ? For me , no , I don't . I don't care about it . It's okay , it's all right .

No , you're a niche knob . You hate designers .

Absolutely not . I am my Aura basket right now , cause I was thinking about ordering something from Aura . I was going to get another thing of Sedra Boys Day , which I guess technically qualifies as niche . I was also going to get the new Aquadiso Parfum . Oh , okay , yeah . So it's like I , you know , I'm still , I'm in the designer club , guys .

Yeah , that's true . I last bottle I bought was Lunarosa Carbon . Yeah , he just was bragging about that . He was bragging about the juicy deal on a five ounce and I had to pull the trigger . I will always do that .

By the way , well , before we get into the , skip a sample and buy it . This is a hundred and fourteen dollars If you get the 2.5 ounce . It's a hundred and forty five dollars If you get the 4.2 ounce of this thing . Yep , and yes , folks , the package does get bigger with the bigger size . Well , in case they were wondering if you were worried .

Ryan's going to make sure and measure every inch and circumference for you . So , okay , it's getting better on the skin Really . Yeah , it's not as salty .

We'll see how it goes . If you catch my drift , yeah , it's definitely not as salty , but I don't know . I have to let it ride for a minute .

Okay , well , let's ride on into the skip it , sample it , Buy it . What are ?

you going to do , mike ? What are you going to do , ryan ? The same thing you're going to do . We're going to skip it . I was almost going to just say it for you yeah , we're going to skip this thing . I can just see his face yeah , it's a face I see often of just pure disappointment , almost regret .

I really do like the original of them all . You used to not do it . It grew on you . Yeah , it really did . You can change your opinion on things , guys . That's something you can do as well , yeah .

It's okay , this isn't bad . If I'd never smelled wanted by night , I'd probably be pretty impressed with this . You think so ? I think so . If I never smelled wanted by night because there is a I feel wanted by night in this , I mean it's made by the same perfumer .

Man . To me , and here's what I'm worried about , I feel like this would be really nice and cooler weather .

Also we have that thing called the heat index , so it actually feels like it's 110 to 115 degrees daily here .

Yeah , it's a nightmare , yeah .

Global warming isn't real , y'all .

Anyway , what were they calling it ? Global scorching or global burning , or something like that ?

I don't know . I feel like I burn enough in Texas and know there's something a myth in the air and the atmosphere , but I'm not getting into that it could be that we're spraying too many fragrances or eating away . Yeah , I'm not going to get into that and we'll probably delete this part anyway . I don't want to be trying to be political people .

Yeah , you do , when you were like trying to slow me down and I was like getting really revved up .

It's getting better on the skin . It's getting better , guys , I just don't know .

Maybe that's it . Maybe it is so concentrated that it's just too much for us . It's too hot to handle .

Let me read an email on the way out . That'll help . Okay , that made me feel better about things . Is this Doug's email ? This is Doug's email . Our winner of the Rouse Club Parfum partial bottle donated to us by myfragansamplescom . Doug wrote Just got an order from myfragranceamplescom .

Hahaha , yeah , don't blame you yeah .

And it I bought a 32 MLD can of Coastal Carolina .

Parfums 2.6 Elixir . I don't blame you for that either . I love that fragrance Hot dang .

does it smell great . This might be my new favorite fragrance . I would have never tried this had it not been for this podcast . Keep up the great work . You know what we are going to keep up the great work .

Yeah , and you're going to keep spraying it up , doug , because we're hooking you up , hahaha With a partial bottle .

Hahaha , that's right , dougie . You're getting a partial bottle , buddy , coming your way .

Thank God it's not LaMala . Elixir . I feel bad sending that one out , hahaha .

Oh boy , what a treat . This episode is probably not going to be for everybody .

I have a feeling the One-Nine Stand Review will be polar opposite . You think so You're calling your shot now ?

Yeah , because it's getting better . The hand's definitely better

Yeah , it did something for a second . Now it smells . It's like spice bomb without the sizzle . Okay , it's sweet , a little spicy . I'm ready to get out of here , dude . Okay , it's hot . I got some nasty emails to send out to some fragrance reviewers .

He's not going to send shit . Alright , everybody , if you loved today's episode and I'm sure you did make sure to check out TheColonPodcastcom . You can see all of our links and also go follow us on your favorite platform . Go hit us up on Patreon . Like we said in the beginning , we have another podcast .

Yeah , you gotta eat . You might as well have fun with it , so we're doing our first two episodes there .

Go , check out our Patreon and listen to us everywhere . Make sure to follow us .

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