You're at the Coaching Inn, 3D Coaching's virtual pub where we enjoy conversations with people who engage in the world of coaching. Hello and welcome to this week's edition of The Coaching Inn. I'm Clare Pedrick and today I'm in conversation with Ruth Davey. Now there's a backstory to this.
So Ruth came on a podcast ages ago and I'll put the link to that in the show notes and it was after that podcast or during that podcast that I expanded my definition of coaching to be a conversation where somebody feels heard or seen and gets new insights into their own stuff. And then you might remember that I then spoke to Mark Galston and changed it to somebody feeling heard, unseen and felt and getting new insights into their own stuff.
And Ruth and I have had some lunch and we've been for a walk and we've had lots of conversations about noticing and looking. And for me, the most common thing that happens when I listen to a recording of somebody coaching, and watch it with them is I say, did you see that? And they say, what? And I say, look again, and they go, just rewind it. And I rewind it. And we look again and they go, yes.
And then they start seeing things in their conversations that they've never seen before that really transform their timing, the depth of their listening and all sorts of things. So Ruth is back today. Welcome Ruth. Hi Claire, it's really nice to be back, how exciting. And we want to tell you about this amazing thing that we've got lined up for the 11th of October 2024.
If you're listening to this in 2025, watch the website because I'm sure there'll be more stuff coming up, coming your way from Ruth and I. But we want to give people an opportunity to experience noticing, so this will be CPD for coaches. You can use it for your credentials or your renewals and it will be training hours and it will be exclusively learning about looking through mindful photography. So Ruth, I'm so excited. Me too.
Just give people a context of a little bit about your journey and who you are. Okay, tell me to stop when I talk too much Claire please. So my background is actually working within a community and international sort of development space and that's what I studied and I've spent 30 odd years working at the grassroots mostly in community development work, but also bringing together my, well more recently, my love of photography. So I've always really enjoyed photography.
something that I've done since I was about 11 really, but I'm totally self-taught. So this really isn't about the tech of photography. But what I've noticed in later years and in particular as a result of having mental health challenges and then a breakdown in 2015 is the importance of the slowing down and really taking time to notice at a much deeper level. And by slowing down, by looking, we can look and not see, but actually if we slow down and we look again, we can actually see.
But the importance, as this work has been developing now for quite a long time, it's a way of seeing and also being seen for who we really are. It's really about authenticity. and courage of seeing and being and feeling who we are as well. So it ties in really well with your lovely introduction, Thank you. Well, I think that we have to engage all our senses to listen. And it just astounds me that we just don't look.
And I think part of that for coaches is that we're We want to do a good job and we're really focusing so much on hearing, listening, that we just don't quite notice what's going on in front of us. But what that means is that we also don't see the impact of the last question we asked and we don't see the processing going on. And that's why in our training, have people always, we train people to notice, we train people to coach and we train people to notice.
we don't have people observing because then they just go, look, you did some coaching there. Actually, we need to notice the impact of what happens when the coach is engaging with the thinker, think. Yeah, yeah. So this will be a new one for me. Yeah, can't wait because I mean, well, as you know, Claire, you know, I've been sort of finding my way with this in well for well over 10 years now.
And right from the start, it was my intention was always to bring my love of photography together with all the community and like all the people work really, but people are also planet because I've had a love of nature, love of the planet and all things. You know, quite an activist in certain ways, often involving my camera, not always, but often. But it's about how we can see at a deeper inner level in order to change the way we are on the outer level.
it's bringing the now, like the being, the being in the moment, the seeing in the moment now, and using that as a way to become more present, to notice in a more conscious way, whether that's ourselves as individuals, whether that's working. you know, with one other person, like in the context of coaching or whether it's working in a team or a community or a wider organization, you know, it can be used at all kinds of different levels.
But it's starting with the sense of we need to do that inner work and we can use our eyes in order to do that. So the photography becomes a tool. It's literally, you know, we don't need to be As I said a minute ago, we don't have to be techie in terms of our knowledge or experience of photography. People usually use their phones these days and it's about the process of looking and seeing. It's not about the outcome.
Although the outcome can change or the approach changes, so the outcomes can change as well. But then as a result of doing that, we can then take action. it's very much, you my approach to mindful photography is very much about action. as well as the being side of things. So it's the doing differently as well as the seeing differently. Say more about that. Your approach to mindful photography is about the action as well as about the seeing.
Yeah, so I mean, it's really about, know, as I mean, I'll I'll kind of talk about it from a personal perspective to start with, because of my own lived experience, which, you know, I think is important to share and So as I said earlier, I've had my own issues, challenges with mental health, and I had a breakdown and stuff, which was really scary. This was back in 2015, and I could hardly get out of bed.
And then as part of learning to, deciding to focus on three things that I loved most in life at that point, which other than my son, who I love probably more than these three things, but it was... my love of photography, my love of nature, and I'd also got into mindfulness. And I slowly realized that what I was doing was looking and seeing literally what was in front of me. So in my home, and using my eyes to see things differently in that moment.
And by seeing things differently in that moment, I was able to reframe how I was feeling. And then as a result of reframing that and being conscious of chain, the changes in the feelings, I was unable to think, well, okay, so what am going to do about that? So, so for example, if I woke up feeling really anxious, which was often the case and still is by the way, you know, I can reframe that by using my eyes and what is around me at the time. and then think, okay.
What am going to do about that right now? And if I'm feeling, say, lonely, or I think, well, what do I need? And I've got various frameworks that I use, one is it involves, well, lots of words that begin with a C that we may touch on more as part of the actual workshop, but one is connection. So it's like, okay, so what does connection look like? And I've created over time a series of images that speak to me of connection. So it's very personal to me.
But if I need connection, I can refer to these images that I can have up on a wall and think, okay, well, that's what connection looks like. What in there is meaningful for me right now. And often it's literally about picking up the phone, speaking to a friend, or picking up the phone and speaking. know, to someone else who might support me at that time.
Or it's about, and often this is the case, this is, and this is really, I mean, literally even this morning, it was the case, I woke up feeling anxious because I'm facing lots of uncertainty at the moment. And it was like, what do I, what do I need right now? I need to be in nature. I need to connect with nature. And so I went for a walk, you know, and I, and I was really, it was a real intentional thing.
that was about helping me reframe and then I use it my eyes when I was out there on my walk to reframe how I was feeling. Yeah. So there's something about us learning to look and reframe and there's also something about us being able to use that with others. Yes, absolutely.
Yeah. And it's very much that it's very much about the personal, but also the collective, you know, and it's it's the personal and the relational it's it's it's the It's the individual within a team or, then it's the whole team. because the thing is everyone sees everything differently. You know, so I have, I have a little prop here that might be handy at this point. Go on. Can I do that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're on YouTube. It's glass. So just a boring, a boring glass, right?
don't have any water in it, but imagine that 10 of us. had exactly the same glass. Now there's an activity that we can do, very simple, quite fun, where we invite people to create images of what they see through this glass, or how they see the glass, but also maybe what they see through the glass. And basically it's an open invitation to be creative.
Everyone will have a different experience, everyone will see differently and everyone will... come up with very, very different photographs, even though the thing, the object is exactly the same. nice. So we'll probably be doing that. lovely. So this time we're going to meet in beautiful Gloucestershire. And it's a trial. It's a pilot. Let's see how we get on. But I'm hoping that we'll be able to go online as well. So that most of you... Yeah. Listeners around the world.
Do you know we have listeners in 127 countries? That's amazing. That's amazing. It made me Google how many countries are there. Sorry, am I sad? No, how many are there? don't know. 180 something, I think. well, you're nearly there Claire. Only 60 more to be. Yeah. Well, we've got, we work with people in 20, 26 countries now. That's amazing. So, yeah. I've got a hard act to follow you guys. We need to share. Absolutely.
I to be honest, know, I mean, I, you know, as far as look again is concerned, you know, the, the, the most of the work that, we, that we've done until now has been very much working in with communities in partnership with communities. So working with lots of charities and other non-profits, but also the public sector. And we've worked quite a lot with the NHS running courses and training programmes, et cetera.
But as the work starts to spread more widely, and we've now, as I say, well, we've trained 120 odd people in 26 countries, the ripple effects of the work are spreading, which... know, is great because you know, what we offer is it's so simple. It's so simple, in essence, and I think that's why it works. And it's really accessible. But at the moment, it's mainly me and, you know, I can't there's not much more I can do.
So that's why collaborating, you know, with the coaching in and others is so important because this can be a that in so many different ways, and obviously within this context, we're looking at how it can be used within more specifically a coaching space. So that's really exciting. And I'm hoping that, yeah, to get an online course that uses, that kind of blends what we do with what you do would be amazing.
Yeah, we're just having such fun with our... online improv course, which we're piloting online at the moment. And it really, really works. So it's different from the face to face. But it's beautiful thing. great. So when we meet with all our lovely listeners who want to come and are local, what can we expect? Without giving away any spoilers? Yeah, no, I mean, What we'll be doing is, I mean, first of all, the location is beautiful.
So we're meeting at Hill House, which is this really, really lovely, beautiful old Cotswold house, very close to where I'm currently based in Stroud in Gloucestershire. And it has the most beautiful gardens. And I ran a retreat there recently and I'm actually running a three-day training program there in, what is it, September. which is nearly full. So exciting. Yeah, really exciting.
it's, it's, it's really, you know, the location is really important because it's, it's about, you know, we didn't want somewhere that, that was, you know, sort of too posh and it's an inverted commerce or, but we also wanted it to be special and somewhere where people could feel at home. And it's a very homely, friendly old house.
that is actually used now as a retreat stroke respite center is that it's run as a charity as well as there's a community interest company as well as a sister charity that mostly supports asylum seekers and refugees and gives them a safe place for refuge in a beautiful setting. So, and I, you know, I happen to have a relationship with them already.
So it was, it's, that's part of it for me, you know, is working in places like that, but It's also, we'll be hopefully, fingers everything crossed, we'll have a beautiful, sunny, warm day in October. And we'll do work inside, but we'll also do some really interesting work outside where we'll be looking again at nature in a way where we will trust that nature will teach us how is them. through her beauty, through the intricacies, through the simplicity, through the natural.
I I see nature as art really, so through nature's art and creativity. And we normally start off with some very basic activities, which will be around learning to see, learning to see differently, learning to see from new perspectives. And we'll set activities and specific practices. that people will invite people to do the activities with their own personal hats on, for their own health, their own wellbeing, their own resilience, et cetera.
But then as part of the creative conversation that we'll offer together, as part of that, we'll see how all of this can really blend in with the coaching space and be adapted. So yeah, we'll be looking at seeing differently new perspectives. We'll also be looking at compassion, seeing with compassion, we'll probably have time for an activity around resilience specifically.
And I would love to introduce an activity that relates to the next whole load of work that we're developing at Look Again in terms of creating the future story as well. So yeah, but the point is not to rush. The point of this is to slow down. and give ourselves the time and the space to look and really see. Yeah. And I'm going to be a delegate and I'm also going to be making some of the connections with coaching. and can you believe it?
You're to get a CPD certificate coming, which you can use for your training or your credential renewal or whatever it is. I am so excited. Dress comfortably. yes. Please. mean, the land is, some of it's quite flat, but there is quite a fairly steep slope that you don't have to go down. you know, if you leave the paths, it's, you know, yeah, just be sensible. Wear sensible footwear. There's plenty of, and wear lots of layers and bring your waterproofs. Bring your waterproofs.
It's going to be very tech. you know, low tech, very intentionally. mean, I will share some images and I will share some of the methodology, but we won't go into that in much depth. It's really an opportunity for people to experience it themselves. Fantastic. Yeah. And then for us to have conversations together around photography, mindfulness, nature connection, and how it can help us to slow down and see differently. notice. I really noticed.
I mean, and I think actually the thing that's becoming more and more important, especially within this space, because I work often in that sort of more mental health well being space, but within the coaching space, and obviously, you know, your, your massive experience can be really useful with this. But it really is, we will, we really will experience how noticing will you know, helps, can really change the way that we can relate to each other.
And we'll experience that literally on the day, but also discuss how that can be used within your coaching experiences. Amazing. So bring your phone camera. Yes, make sure your phones are totally charged. and make sure that there is enough storage space on your phones as well. The whole point is that we don't create loads and loads of photographs because mindful photography is the opposite of snapping away.
It's creating images with intent slowly and we bring our attention to our breath and how we're feeling of all of our senses as well as part of that process. So it's not about snapping and creating loads and loads of images. Do you have some storage? Please do. Yeah. So I mean, just just also that to mention that, you know, the learning from nature side of things is is so important. And I'm very interested and very involved with the regenerative leadership space.
And I've recently completed a 12 month journey with a whole load of other people. And many of them were coaches of all kinds of different coaches. And I'm still learning a huge amount from some of those people and from literature and the community that I've joined as part of that. it's this, in essence, this idea that we are We are so separate from nature. And, you know, that's what we've become.
And that we need in order for us to see how our gifts and our talents and, know, whatever our work is and what we we love, what we enjoy, how we can use that not just for ourselves, but for the, you know, for others and for the wider world, whether that's in relation to the climate crisis or well, the massive, the poly crises that we're facing right now.
mean, you know, and all the uncertainty that we're facing and the fear that so many of us are feeling around the world and increasingly in Western Europe and well, you know, the global north as well. So, yeah, you know, I'll be aiming to bring some of that conversation into this as well through at least one of the practices. Good. So lots of practice in noticing in all sorts of different systemic ways. Yeah. Check out the website www.3dcoaching.com slash deeper hyphen noticing.
I'll put that in the show notes and we'd love to see you. And if you're listening to this after October, check the website. telling when the next date is. Great. Great. Thank you. Thanks for coming to the Coaching In. Next time we meet we'll meet in real life. Yay. Thank you for listening everybody. Hope to have the next time we meet it will be in real life. Bye bye. Thanks for listening.
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