Michael and Dave close out the first season of the podcast with the 1st annual Golden Gorilla Penis Awards. So many choices, so little time. Share your favorite memories from the first year and buckle up for a raucous new season coming your way in another week! We truly do appreciate all of your support throughout the year and can't wait to put more stuff in your ears. Thanks for listening! Please buy some: Stickers! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow u...
Dec 02, 2020•22 min•Season 1Ep. 29
Michael and Dave were joined by comedian Brad Howe. The guys watched the first and last 15 minutes of the supposed Greatest Sports Movie of All Time 'Hoosiers,' and Brad quizzed them on the middle. While the guys didn't learn much about what happened in the center, they did learn that Brad has a proclivity for the finer things...like Whitesnake. The movie itself is a feel-good, basket-sinking, gay-porn-sounding barn burner, and the guys wouldn't have it any other way. Thanks for listening! Get r...
Nov 18, 2020•56 min•Season 1Ep. 28
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the infamous "Red Dragon"-inspired Hannibal. The guys question who did what, and what they tasted like. Dave liked the doggos, and Michael wants to see Hugh Dancy nake...wait, what? No children with Asperger's were harmed in the recording of this podcast, or ever. Trust us (but maybe not with your children)! Thanks for listening! Please buy some: Stickers! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmai...
Nov 04, 2020•1 hr 13 min•Season 1Ep. 27
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the 80's cult slasher Sleepaway Camp. This movie is a pro-pedophilia, dick-having, vomit-inducing, laugher, and we are HERE for it. We meet the craziest mother of all time. Mel, the head of the camp is a fish out of water, and gets sent to the back of the pac,man by Angela and her mad bow skillz. I just can't do this movie justice with words. Just go watch the damn thing. Thanks for listening! Please buy some: Stickers! Billy, the poor fu...
Oct 21, 2020•54 min•Season 1Ep. 26
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the Amazon Prime version of Utopia. Despite what the Reddit critics spout, this thing is chock full of violence. Its also full of nerds, nerds, and more nerds. John Cusack somehow looks older than Joe Pesci in The Irishman, but he makes good points. Dwight is now Michael, and there's a man named after a restaurant? Color us confused. Somehow, despite all odds, we started working on our Millard Fillmore musical. You're welcome. Thanks for li...
Oct 07, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Season 1Ep. 25
Michael and Dave watched nothing. They are here to announce the grand opening of The Center Cut section of the Doodlist Sticker Shop! To start there are four designs, with more to come via pre-order. The Break-line, #GorillaPenis, LOST, and Firefly. All delicious. Help support the show that supports your boring days with weird shit. Please and thank you! Thanks for listening! Buy some: Stickers! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Faceboo...
Sep 30, 2020•11 min
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the critically acclaimed mindfuck Mulholland Drive! Jasmin and Mells from the Damn Fine TV podcast were along for the ride to offer up their David Lynch expertise to help sort out the middle...nah, that's not possible! There are multiple characters with the same name, and gloomy hobo, and many references to LOST as usual. But, don't break your achy breaky heart, because Billy Ray Cyrus was apparently in this movie and we missed it. This m...
Sep 23, 2020•1 hr 15 min•Season 1Ep. 24
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the recently ended first season of the HBO show Perry Mason. There is a dead baby, human penis, and miserable sex with a self-proclaimed 'wetback' who ends up buying Perry's farm--and that's only in the first half of the first episode! There's also pie in pie action, a crazy cult, three actors from LOST, and the guys try to stitch up the middle like those kidnappers stitched up baby Charlie's eyes. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback a...
Sep 09, 2020•59 min•Season 1Ep. 23
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the semi-predictive Mike Judge comedy movie Idiocracy! Mike from Wack Brackets was along for the ride to offer his expertise to help sort out the middle and sway Dave into liking the movie. If you thought 2020 was scary, wait until you see 2505! A reality star is president, fat people rule the world, and people have to gamble to pay for healthcare. If you don't like this episode, fuck you! Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new ...
Aug 26, 2020•1 hr 3 min•Season 1Ep. 22
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the second season of Netflix' Umbrella Academy! 1. They loved it! 2. Bad guys suck at shooting. 3. Diego is less horrible this season! 4. Vanya still sucks (and not just lady parts). 5. Five. 6. Harlan sucks. 7. Time travel is confusing. Thanks for listening! Michael's Worst Car Picture Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook| Youtube| Instagram | Podcast Logo by Cindy Ingeme In...
Aug 12, 2020•1 hr 6 min•Season 1Ep. 21
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the 90's satirical horror Scream! Courtney & Joe were along for the ride and offered their expertise to help sort out the middle with fun facts along the way. Drew Barrymore found some time outside of her Tom Green marriage to die, unexpectedly. Sidney's boyfriend climbs through her window...but where is Ferguson?! Turns out that two heads are better than one...until those heads get stabbed. Get your popcorn ready, but don't forget to...
Jul 29, 2020•55 min•Season 1Ep. 20
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the first season of the comic book adaptation Warrior Nun! Alba Baptista nails the role as a 19 year old who used to have a broken body. Adriel nails the homeless look. For a show taking place in Spain, there's VERY little Spanish spoken. The guys also find the time to touch on JK Rowling, even though she doesn't like to be touched on. Is that insensitive? Words, man. Quit getting upset about them and grow up! Thanks for listening! Send you...
Jul 15, 2020•57 min•Season 1Ep. 19
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the gritty gambling movie Uncut Gems! Adam Sandler won awards for this? Did we watch parts of the wrong movie? He gambles, yells, and has bad teeth. Michael does that shit errrry' day and he gets no awards. And Dave has a lucky rock that he keeps in his pocket and has had a colonoscopy. You don't see him getting any awards! Trash. Pure trash. Go Celtics! Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gm...
Jul 08, 2020•47 min•Season 1Ep. 18
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of the cult classic solo season of Firefly! Joss Whedon eventually avenged the cancellation and found serenity by slaying the box office, but still, he is no angel. See what I did there Huh? Huhhh? But, really, the guys like the show but find many flaws in the hokey space western. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook| Youtube| Instagram | Podcast Logo by Ci...
Jun 24, 2020•59 min•Season 1Ep. 17
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the James Cameron deep sea thriller The Abyss! Underwater is a frightening place--its dark, gloomy, and apparently there are alien sea creatures who glow many colors and listen to Papa Roach. The guys throw science out the window, as they bathe in tales from the briny deep. One rat may or may not have died in the filming of this movie. Thanks for listening! Nick Offerman's Headshot Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutc...
Jun 10, 2020•44 min•Season 1Ep. 16
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of season 1 of White Lines on Netflix! DJs, cocaine, and orgies...all in the first episode! Alex Pina, the creator of Money Heist, one upped himself in the wild department, and we were along for the ride. Dogs snort coke. Oriol releases his sexual fluids because he's sexually fluid. King dies. And, somehow, we discuss bidets. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Fac...
May 27, 2020•51 min•Season 1Ep. 15
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the topical thriller Contagion! This movie parallels our current Covid-19 ravaged lives and boy does it bum the guys out. Gwyneth loses her head, literally. Jude Law breaks his namesake to make loads of money. A bat eats a rotten banana, and awwww shit, insta-Pandemic. Old people will need to die. It's decided. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook| You...
May 13, 2020•51 min•Season 1Ep. 14
This is a Bonus episode! Michael and Dave invited the Thirst For Knowledge guys to the pod! Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the chick flick Sex and the City. The TFK guys watched the entire movie and quizzed the guys on what happened in the middle. Marriages are conceived. Marriages are canceled. Marriages are back on. Middle aged women are confusing. Check out the companion piece to this pod based around Brokeback Mountain on the TFK feed. Thanks for listening! Check o...
May 07, 2020•48 min•Season 1Ep. 13
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episodes of season 1 of Outer Banks on Netflix! It's a teen drama starring adults, kind of like how this a podcast with childish humor hosted by adults. The only difference is they search for treasure and we just want you to listen to us talk to each other over the Internet. We could really use a JJ right about now, minus the gun and messed up childhood. You're not still reading this, are you? Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode id...
Apr 29, 2020•48 min•Season 1Ep. 12
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the 1973 rock opera Jesus Christ Superstar! Dave used to go to church before priests molesting little boys became popular again, and Michael once played a man who was molested by a priest in a play. So, yeah, church is maybe not their thing. But singing about pizza and Jesus is! Man, people in the 70's did a lot of drugs...Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | F...
Apr 15, 2020•45 min•Season 1Ep. 11
Michael and Dave tried something new for the holiday. They watched the middle of the critically acclaimed ballet flick Black Swan...without any audio. One of the hosts dies of Covid-19. April Fool's! The fellas tried to pick something nice to watch, but instead of ballet pink, this movie is all about the....other pink. Dancers gon' dance, harassers gon' harass, and diddlers gon' diddle. Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis do the other kind of dancing, all while Nat's mom watches from the doorway. All...
Apr 01, 2020•52 min•Season 1Ep. 10
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the worst movie of all time Leprechaun 4: In Space. To celebrate St. Patrick's Day, we got drunk and recorded in-person! The only thing worse than the dialogue in this movie is the CGI, the acting, the plot, and its existence. Listen as we stumble through words and struggle to keep our eyes open, laughing all the way. While you might not learn much from this one, it'll take the luck o' the Irish to not enjoy it...in space. Thanks for listening! S...
Mar 17, 2020•33 min•Season 1Ep. 9
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the 80's classic Say Anything. Break out your boombox, black belt, and 80's regalia! Yeaaaaaaa! While Cusack and his love interest Diane graduate from high school, Diane's dad is busy graduating to felony. We didn't get to see the famous boombox scene, but the real joy for us is in your eyes. Watch out for that foot, and wait for the ding, you brain. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Foll...
Mar 04, 2020•40 min•Season 1Ep. 8
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the Eminem pseudo-biopic 8 Mile. Eminem's a rabbit? But as a rapper, no one's better/Except for when he got real scared and vomited on his sweater. Mekhi is from the future, and B. Murphy gives the middle finger/Em has a little daughter, and is a horrible lullaby singer. The movie was aiiight, it left a bit to be desired/and Dave is bad at rapping, so from the podcast he is fired. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode i...
Feb 19, 2020•35 min•Season 1Ep. 7
Michael and Dave watched the first and last 15 minutes of the Oscar-nominated The Irishman. I heard you host a podcast? Apparently even mobsters get old and die. It's a sad, sad end for a steely eyed airtight hitman who could always squash the beef. Joe Pesci is so decrepit. Just leave the door open, please. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook| Youtube| Podcast Logo by Cindy Ingeme Intro/Outro music by Bryan...
Feb 05, 2020•43 min•Season 1Ep. 6
Michael and Dave watched the first and last episode of the first season of The Witcher. Geralt slays monsters, women, and mostly our hearts. Many people die, the important players all wear colorized contact lenses, and there are ridiculous names abound. This one is for the true nerds, so let your freak flag fly, and buckle up for some too-deep thoughts on magic feathers. Yennnniferrrrrr! Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twi...
Jan 22, 2020•46 min•Season 1Ep. 5
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the cult horror monstrosity The Human Centipede. Shield your eyes! Cover your butts! Don't ever go to Germany! Mistakes were made, necks were slit, and blood was licked, but we still don't understand what happened to the evil doctor's legs. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook Podcast Logo by Cindy Ingeme Intro/Outro music by Bryan Valeri...
Jan 08, 2020•39 min•Season 1Ep. 4
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the 1983 holiday classic A Christmas Story. It's enough to make them want to shoot their eyes out. Break out the egg nog and throw on your best bunny costume. While the turkey may be gone, we're both hams, ready to tackle the "racist" scene like a pack of wild dogs. We saved the best gift for the end, so stick your ears to our pod like a tongue to a pole. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals! Shit, wrong movie. Thanks for listening! Send your feedb...
Dec 25, 2019•43 min•Season 1Ep. 3
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the 2011 animated film Puss in Boots. Fee-fi-fo-fum, this movie is very dumb. It's kitty-litteraly the worst. We won't ever look at eggs the same way again. Or cats. Or movies. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook Podcast Logo by Cindy Ingeme Intro/Outro music by Bryan Valeri...
Dec 11, 2019•37 min•Season 1Ep. 2
Michael and Dave watched the beginning and end of the 2012 gem Magic Mike. Do we get to see Channing's Tatums? Adam hates Mike's furniture; everybody hates Adam. Matthew McConaughey leaves us dazed and confused. Can you touch this? No, no, no, no, no. Thanks for listening! Send your feedback and new episode ideas to thecentercutcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter | Facebook Podcast Logo by Cindy Ingeme Intro music by Bryan Valeri...
Nov 27, 2019•42 min•Season 1Ep. 1
