I guess who just got back today. The Brooklyn Moss that had been away. They both have so much to see. You know their names of brilliant.
Skiers Brooklyn Boys episode number three thirteen woo yeah, the Pound drone episode Buddy.
And by the way, speaking of episode three thirteen, Scary Yeah. For those of you who've already listened to Slice Time for episode three twelve, I accused Scary of being wrong at the beginning of the Slice Time intro and saying it was Slice Time.
Episode three long. Yeah, now you've got a face. He actually, so you don't have to bombarred me. Hopefully you hear everything in order. But yep, I went back and listened, and he was I don't know why I was thinking he said three eleven. He may have said three eleven later in the sentence, or sometimes he says it's for three twelve and three eleven in earlier, whatever the case. So I already know that I was mistaken. So there you go. Okay, so you're going to clear the air
right there. Wow, Brody is wrong.
No, it was wrong, no longer wrong because no light that I said I was wrong, right right, So welcome back from vacation. Eighty three.
Yeah, hey, guess what that may be in the rear view, but vacation eighty four is only a few weeks away. Yeah, I know holiday holiday vacations coming. No, no, no, Thanksgiving the week Thanksgiving week holiday vacation. Yeah yeah, not Christmas. M hm. Hey, listen, I don't call the shots. Don't shoot the messenger. Theres a lot of shooting going on. You don't call the shots, but you don't object to the shots. That's fine. Oh yeah, I'm taking everything I can get. Oh my god, I still should.
By the way, I was just gonna say, we play boys or back in town whenever you take vacation, and I think we may play that as much as this startup startup jingle. Yes, you take vacation almost as much. That being said, if people listen like six weeks from now, because they're behind, they were like, oh, I guess at some point six weeks ago they're on vacation.
I don't, you know, you look at me? Makes sense unless you listen live. You look at me through the camera. You know what's going on with your face? What are you doing? Well, dude, we were at we were at the event last night for Danielle. We were it was not a sponsor, but this was all for Saint No, all for Saint Jude. It was all very money with the Saint Jude. We went went went to a haunted house. Last night was with blood Man, a locally here in New York City. I saw the makeup job on all
of you. Yeah, the whole morning show, uh you know, was part of it, and we were all, you know, relegated to our different rooms. I was in Clowntown and I chose a clown costume. But what I didn't realize the time was when you dress as a clown at Clowntown in their haunted house, you're in that's where everything is three D fluorescent under black lights, so you need special makeup. So they didn't put me in the regular makeup chair. They put me in the I don't know
what this was, but it was the floor. This guy needs extra help chare. Yeah. No, no, it was a separate room where a fan needed to you know, a look, not a fan. I'm talking about that physical fan and like clean the air every fucking ten minutes. Because it was the makeup. That's I guess it's like airbrush makeup
where they spray you with shit. Oh sure, and it was like orange and green, and that that makeup is special makeup so that when you see it in person, like it looks three D it's jumping out at you and and you're under the black light. Yeah. So so anyway, it doesn't it doesn't come off very well. So if you take a look at my fingernails, oh yeah, they look normally. The dirt they normally have on them. No, no, your nails, No dirt in your nails. No, the dirt,
see that that's not dirt, that's yeah, black. And the cuticle they made my it's on my nail bed. Everything. I scrubbed the hell out of it. I don't know what. I don't know what's gonna And then if you look at my face, certain parts of my face still have these speckles on them. Oh yeah, look you have one eyebrow. Yeah of course, Okay, I was gonna let you finish your own joke. Thanks, but yeah, no, I've got I've got like black paint on me.
And so why didn't you ask then or google now what to use to get it off?
I'm learning now that. And why did they make your teeth green? No, that's the actual color of my They didn't touch my teeth. That's my teeth. Hey, thanks, hard to tell? Well anyway, it said the number one thing that it says to remove airbrush fluorescian paint, like this is a big Clark acid. No, it's actually baby oil. Now. I may not be ditty, but now, but isn't it
crazy how your mind? Now that you think of something so simple and wholesome and something is set like a Johnson's baby oil, all of a sudden you think p Diddy because he was caught with what of a thousand cases of it? Something like that? You know what else is ruined for me this week? What you know?
I go to I go to dinner with my friend Jeff once a week, once every other week. And I if I have soda now because I told you I don't drink a lot of soda, I'll have a diet coke and ice. You know that's my thing. My jam mostly water now, but I occasionally die coke and ice. And he has the same drink all the time, which is an Arnold Palmer. An Arnold Palmer, as you know,
is half iced tea half lemonade. Because the famous golfer Arnold Palmer used to drink that, so they named it after him because he became famous to drinking that and people are like, oh, what's that drink? And so so it's like it's like putting extra lemon in your ice tea, right right, If you like iced tea with.
Lemon, You're like, oh, I'll put lemonade in it. It's a great It's like I used.
To put I used to put h lemonade in my die coke sometimes, okay, because like putting a lemon so and I don't get credit for that the David Brody, Right, but you know, Arnold Palmer's name was in the news this week.
I'm sure you know. Why are you not aware? Not aware? Oh yeah, all right, yep.
Right, So for those who don't know what I'm talking about, because it's it's there's a punchline coming. Trump was telling his story in a campaign rally in Latrobe, Pennsylvania. Latrobe is where Arnold Palmer either was born possibly, but also he has a golf course there called Latrobe and he anyway, so he was mentioning all Arnold Palmer was a friend of mine, and allegedly went on he wanted for like ten minutes talking about how Arnold Palmer had this massive
penis that other golfers would shower with him. First of all, I'm pretty sure golfers don't shower together. It's not a team sport, I do. I don't think that part of the story is accurate. But anyway he's talked about, Arnold Palmer was known for having a giant dick. So now all over social media people are like, I can never drink an Honold again without thinking about of his bartle's penis.
Penis. Yeah, people were like, well, what else should we call it?
We have to call it something else, So I suggest you call it a cocktail.
Hile who Yeah. So now every time I think of baby oil, I think if he did, now I gotta go get some baby or Arnold Palm, you think of a giant con to run, run, gotta get this fucking makeup off of me. And well, listen, people's names are ruined all the time by major hurricanes. Poor Helene, I mean people named Helene right now, like, bah.
You know what's gonna be the not it's gonna be terrible. But if if, and when the time comes and there's a Hurricane Karen that does damage, it'll be like, oh, yeah, fucking Karen.
Yeah, but already Karen's names is ruined isis And if you have the name Isis, you know you're you're pretty much screwed. Screwed in fact, who God isis anymore. Gandhi was talking about on The Big Show that she knew a person named Covid before or Covid. Oh that's not
that's really Yes, she knows a person named Covid. I don't know if it was a boy or girl, but anyway, but there are people whose people whose names are ruined by uh, you know, just for whatever it is, or you're you know again, you associate something with something else because it became popular in pop culture and not in a positive way.
So yeah, well there's there was a I saw a guy on somebody screenshot at it, but it was a guy named Jeffrey Epstein who was like, I'm not that Jeffrey Epstein.
Oh my god, that's my friend. Oh you have a friend named Jeffrey epste Jeffrey Epstein, did we talk about this what we have talked about? Yes? It was me. You're talking about you're doing the story about my friend shot on Twitter.
I was not talking about your friend and I it's the same, just like me where I get I get shipped for having the same name as David Brody, the Christian broadcaster, because every time he does something people don't like. They're like, fuck you, your piece of shit. I'm like, no, I am, maybe guilty of things, but not that.
Yeah.
So you would imagine the hurricane if you have a hurricane, but usually the hurricane names aren't like Hurricane Mike.
Now, Katrina will always be uh. I mean, if your name is Katrina, people people remember many years ago I worked with a Katrina. Yeah. Yeah, so that one did that was hit. A lot of devastation in that one. So unfortunately, I mean, there was a Hurricane Andrew that hit Miami after twenty five thirty years ago. That did a lot of damage. Andrews a fairly common name, right, so it may fade with time, but for now, Helene, Yeah,
what a mess. Yeah. So I was on vacation. I went to New Orleans, the Big Easy.
Do you remember the sketch from SNL the I just came back from No Orlean's sketch. No where everybody, so it's with Oh it's a great sketch. I forget her name, uh, the tall blonde on the show. Anyway, the whole sketches wherever she goes on vacation, she speaks like a native.
Oh, we just came back from New Orleans.
We had some hurricanes drying and so there was a recurring sketch for a while that, So where's your accent?
I'm not that guy. I gotta say, though, for all those who want to go visit, save your money. Really, I don't know, Brody, I you know what, I went there a drinker partier. I went there. The last time I was there was like twenty five years ago. I was there like two or three times. And listen, while it has a lot of culture, and it's got a lot of food, great food, Cajun, Creole, amazing cooking. I have to say it's I can get great food anywhere, and and it's not worth it for me because I
felt it was it was grimy, it was gritty. Now it wasn't just the usual French quarter gritty where you know, people were taking a piss on the side of walls there. You know, it was I felt safe inside the French Quarter because it was protected, but it was there was that that kind of like sleeves factor about it, you know, like this, just like strip club after strip club after strip club on Bourbon Street. You know it was filthy,
it had a smell to it. But but if you complain about New York in this area, about the uh the insane asylum running the town, it's ten times worse over there. And you know they have a homeless problem, like I know a lot of cities in America do. But it's just once once it gets dark, and once you're on the perimeters of the French Quarter and you're outside of it, and I don't know, there's something about it that's just not great. I don't know, it's it's weird.
You know, a lot of those of car cars, what was it, the three the three legged cars, the three wheeled cars. Yeah, well, well whether it be the two wheels in the front, one in the back, or one in the front and two in the back right right, run with the neon lights and blasted and make music, noise pollution. I just felt no, I just didn't feel like listen, I go to Vegas, I go to Miami.
I could party. I could party any city in the world. Okay, I'll go to but I feel like there's more to see at this point, and I don't want to take a crap on New Orleans like I'm doing right now, but it's just I just didn't didn't love it the way I remembered it. I remembered it being so much more, so much better. You romanticized it? Is that what that
is romanticizing? I remember I remember back in the day going for a hurricane at Patt O'Brien's and it was it was awesome, and it was had a great time. And now I just felt like it was a little CD. It was a little downtrodden. It was a little I think maybe when you were in your thirties, CD was fun. No, there's something happened during the pandemic that I don't know turning back or maybe it was actually maybe I think it might have been the hurricane that blew through there.
What did they got? They got Katrina? Right, So that was two thousand and four, like that was quite a while. Yeah, Well I hadn't been there, but since before that, I don't think that I think they've recovered twenty years later from Hurricane Katrina. I oh, I don't know about that, but I don't think that I don't think. I don't. I don't think one of the side effects of a hurricane is seediness. I don't know the case. I had family to go to New Orleans about two months ago.
They loved it, but yeah, I wanted to love it. I wanted to love it. But anyway, since that was New Orleans. And then I spent some time in in in Florida, went to West Palm Beach and I went to Fort Lauderdale. That was cool, you know, down, I'm back here I am and had your boys end up there? Which boys, Oh, Jetski Brian wasn't there, like two or three boys were you?
Now?
Well, well, well Jetske Brian came with me, and then we took turns like you know, visiting our friends like with like it was like literally like who's going to be in the guest chair tonight because we have a lot of friends with a lot of people where you yeah, a lot of friends of ours moved to South Florida and never came back, Like Ryan Knuckles. Oh, by the way, Ryan Knuckles Knuckles, Yeah that yeah, that's his real last name. Knuckles. No, that's his nickname. Nope, it's his last name.
But that's such as did you become friends with him because his name was Knuckles. He's got a nickname already.
Yeah, and you c k o ls Ryan Knuckles. So anyway that somebody so his daughter, Nope, that's his last name. His daughter. Somebody's okay, two hundred years ago. Somebody made the name up. All names were made up at some point, right, somebody made it up. But we were down there during the Mets in the in the playoffs, and I know, we really don't want to talk too much about this because it was gonna make that well. I mean, uh,
they overachieved, had a great season. They did. I'm happy they got as far as I like the Phillies who had a great season then choked. I mean that's right. But but isn't it true of the losing team that doesn't make it. We always say, well, we're just happy we made it this far. You know, we listen the team.
Any sport you root for slices if your team isn't supposed to get to the playoffs, and not only they get to the playoffs, they knock off two other teams, yeah, and get to the the championship game of the league, two games away from the world series.
To face the best Yeah, to face the best team in baseball, the Dodger. That's grave. Now you have optimism for next By the way, you're gonna beat the Yankees. Sorry did I say that? You did say that? Sorry anyway. So, by the way, Heidi Gardner was in that sketch. Oh, of course, so I was so I anyway, I was down there. So during the week we were watching the games everywhere we went. And Ryan Knuckles daughter, her name is Shae, named after Shae Stadium, Nice Knuckles, Shane Knuckles.
She sounds like a really bad French restaurant in New Orleans. Oh, it's so ceedy. We were having dinner at Shane Knuckles. You talk about a classless place in New Orleans, but this was an except this was Boca is Ba. All right. I love I love Shan's mouth. I love Shae well anyway, in English, Shaye lives in Bocha. So she made me a friendship bracelet. Taylor was in town for the week. She tared the Swifties and invaded South Florida for the weekend. And so so Shae was in the mood to to
uh to to make friendship bracelets. And she made me a a Scary Jones friendship bracelet in the colors of the Mets. That's where that's where I was going with this. So I put on the Mets bracelet when I got it on Monday or Tuesday, hoping that it would bring us luck. I'm like, you know what, this is gonna be like the coffee stained shirt year where I wouldn't take off the shirt that had the coffee stain, my
Met shirt and I wouldn't wash it. Yeah, right until yeah, because I felt like I was giving the Mets luck, you know, like twenty fifteen. Well, I'm like me, yep, I did not take off this bracelet. I did. I showered with it, I slept with it, so that the Shae made me this this, this this bracelet with the Mets colors, and and I worried it wasn't the Brooklyn Boys podcast colors. It couldn't be. Well no, well she wanted to. She knew I was a Met fan, so
she made it anyway. Anyway, Yeah, the Mets suck. The Mets lost, so I thought this was gonna be the thing that got a little the Braves and they beat the Brewers and they beat the Phillies. I know, and it was a lot to be proud of, especially beating the Phillies. God, I'm a I'm a Jets fan, you're a Giants fan. We gotta be happy about the Mets season. Yeah, that's true. Football teams are terrible. But yeah, I mean, anyway, I thought we were it was the start of something lucky,
but it wasn't. I was. I was hoping to come back, you know, I was. I was hoping to have a triumph. I predicted a triumphant return. And I told Ryan, I'm like, I can't wait to get on the Brooklyn Boys with Brody and say the Mets are the Mets are in the World Series because of Shay's bracelet. And I was gonna hold it up to the camera, but like, this is why the Mets are in the World Series. But now I can't that.
You imagine Shoo Tani, one of the greatest baseball players of all time, at the plate, striking out going damn bracelet, you know, but in Japanese, of course, Hey by, let me let me play that New Orleans clip real quick on my call.
Hold on, here we go, so we just call them the night whatever, Let's just go Hello, my sexy about five years ago. Sorry, we're moving so slow. We just got back from Nolin, you know, moving like a gator down Bobbing Street. Blame. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no no. You know when you've been in Orleans, the slow gets inside it and it sticks to it bound like no Orleans Molesses. I grew up in New Orleans and I've never heard of Nolans Molestes. Anyway. There's just there's a running sit that she did.
Wherever she went away to, she'd come back and she was transformed, uh into anyway anyway, So I got get I know.
It's a surprise. I got a couple of pickleball stories and a couple of time scams. I have to share with you that maybe one's going to infuriate people, and one is very very helpful tip that I learned from someone who infuriated me when I figured out what they had done. I can't wait to hear it right after that podcast.
All right, I'm going to start with the time stories. So I decided to meet someone who was from out of town and they were staying in Brooklyn.
Brooklyn.
They told me where they were staying, and I said, oh, he's like we should have lunch. I said, I have a great idea. Why don't we meet at lmb's Pomoni Gardens, my favorite pizza place in that area, and I'll treat you to some local pizza and in Gravesend, which is, you know, right near Bensonhurst, right next door.
Great. Absolutely, So I look and I see. I tell them, let's meet at one o'clock. And I have a pretty good idea of how long it'll take in the get there. He said he had a car, his friend lent him a car, and he was going to drive from I think he was staying by Prospect Park, which you know is about twenty minutes no traffic from the pizza place I'm meeting him at. So I drive from New Jersey.
It takes me, I don't know, forty minutes, maybe forty five minutes to get there. I get there on time. I get there at one o'clock and I sit down. Now, you know, the tables outside at Spamoni Gardens are benches with umbrellas, and some of them are benches without umbrellas, like umbrella in the middle of the table hold there's a table hoole like picnic benches right to table with picnic benches, but they're metal.
You can't move the benches. So I get a table and I'm sitting there by myself at the table, and it's like one ten. So I text him and I say, uh, hey, I'm here. Just you know, I have a table that I'm sitting in the third table on the right, blah blah blah.
And he says, oh, okay, he said, but I miscalculated. I won't be there until about one thirty. I miscalculated time. It's taken me longer to get there than I thought. Well, scare, here's my question. How can you be thirty minutes late from a place that's only twenty minutes away if you
miss calculating? Yeah, right, if you say, hey, I had traffic and I'm gonna I'm gonna be there like one fifteen instead of one, I sense a fib a fib which means he didn't leave until approximately one o'clock our meeting time.
Of course, not so if you if you knew it was twenty minutes no traffic, could you would have left at twelve forty, right, But now you're it's taking you fifty minutes. You didn't say you got lost you. Yeah, he's got a phone. How are you? How did you miscalculate the drive that you're thirty minutes late? Freak twenty minute commute? It's great. Yeah, I can't tell you. I
can't figure it out. Well, i'll tell you what he's he he knows that he's gonna face your wrath if he tells you the truth, because you're gonna you're gonna like be snarky about it. Tell me you got stuck on a garbage truck. Oh you wanted, Oh you want him to lie? Well, tell me tell me you got lost. I got on the I got on the somehow I know I did. The fact that I just blatant disregard of the time. Well, if you're gonna lie, I'm saying, be better at it, don't say I miss calculated. Look,
would you rather him just he's a calculate. He's afraid to tell you the calculator longer would take to get dressed. He didn't want to. He didn't want to get into the argument with you.
Look, even let's say it was a twenty minute trip and you hit traffic and it's forty minutes, right then you'd be there one.
Twenty one fifteen. Anyway, he didn't end up getting it till one forty five, of course. Yeah, all right, okay, he did the old I'm gonna be late, but I'm gonna lessen how late i'm gonna be, so I don't have to like hear the anger on the phone, and when I get there, you'll be happy enough to see me. That's right. So here did I talk about the guy who sat down at my table? Do we talk about this? He just sat down. So I'm sitting there now again.
There's a bench on each side of the table like most picnic tables, and I'm sitting there and he says, he says, He starts to put his leg over the bench and goes, is anyone sitting here? So I said, well, I'm waiting for my friend. He'll be here any minute.
He goes, oh, And he goes to the bench behind me, where there are two guys sitting at a bench, one on each side of the bench. And he sits down and says, hey, move over, please, I get some room.
And he sits down at the bench next to one of the two guys, and they're like, don't know what to say, because who does that? Who sits down at a bench, you know, in public, and two people having lunch to having you know it's a part of a park bench type bench.
Yeah, like a bench. You've been the Spermoni gardens, of course. You like sides of the table basically like cafeteria style tables, folks with the like a polic table, right right. I said, it's a picnic table. You've been there, scared many times one of those tables. Right. Who sits down at a picnic table next to strangers without saying is it okay if we sit down? And then they're like, uh, okay, okay, awkward.
So I'm fake down that behind me, so my back is to them, but you know, the tables are close. They're already like two feet behind me. And I hear the guy say to these guys, Yeah, fucking guy here tells me I can't sit next. It tells me his friends coming. You see his fucking friend. I don't see his fucking friend. Oh good. So I'm like, holy shit, this guy thinks I'm lying him. Where the fuck is the guy I'm eating?
So like five minutes later, my friend's still not there, and this guy's like, see the guy fucking didn't want to sit next to me.
Now, I want to just share a little bit of the story here. The two guys at the table behind me are Italian guys from the neighborhood. The guy I told the action that you did hold on, the guy who wanted to sit down next in front of me, happened to be black, which is a minority in our neighborhood. I'm only saying this because by the third time he said to the other two guys, fucking guy must be a racist. Didn't want me to sit with him. So
at this point I'm like, job, where is my friend? Please? God, let my friends share up. Please? You need to texting them. Are you almost here? You need I just yeah, because otherwise it looks like I'm like, it doesn't yeah, it looks like you're racist. I don't want I don't know who sits next to me. I don't want any strangers sitting at my table, to be quite honest with you. But more importantly, my friend told me he'd be there
any minute. All right, So that's the right there. You need to submit that to Larry David that that is a curb your enthusiasm scene easily. That's perfect. That's so funny. Yeah, the off the air, but yeah, that's right.
Yeah, Like I felt like, like Larry David not a racist because Larry David, the frame would have canceled, never showed up, it never showed in the guy, and then the black man would have eventually finished his meal and left and walked away going yeah, you're racist, right, racist?
No racist. I got a chance exactly. I got a chance to catch up on the last season A Curb while I was flying and I gotta I saw the episode with that everyone's been referencing, which people think that I stole off of Larry David, but no, does life imitate art or arn't imitates life? Talking about the Breakfast after eleven o'clock, the episode when he tries to get breakfast at ten after eleven, and I'm like, holy shit, that happened to me in life. We talked about that
on the podcast. I just saw that episode the other day. It's hysterical. Yeah, very funny episode, Yeah, very funny. Uh yeah, okay, so the other time, the time situation scary.
You're gonna love this, slices, you're gonna love this. I didn't love it because I realized what it happened to me, but what a I don't even think. I don't even not one hundred percent sure the person did it on purpose, and I called him out on it. But you will do this now as a great way to get out of things when you're home.
Okay. So I'm on the phone with a friend of mine who works very early in the morning, okay, And I'm on the phone with them.
It's like ten thirty at night. We had been on the phone for about forty minutes. We're having a good conversation, and it's ten thirty and he says to me, hold on one second. Uh, you know Amazon Device.
You know yep? So I don't want to say by her name yep, yeah, call her, call her daddy.
So so he's says, hey, Amazon Device, set my alarm for five am tomorrow. So I went, wow, you have to get oh. And that's when I realized he set his alarm to five o'clock in the morning on the phone with me as a way to tell me it's getting late.
I gotta get up early in the morning. I gotta get off the phone. Rude or saying I gotta get off he was serving you a social cue that you missed or you got it, picked up on it.
He politely let me know that he had to go to bed and I was talking too much and he wanted to get off the phone.
That's a great way of doing it. That's so, hey, Google, set my alarm for really early tomorrow morning. And this way, he hopes that you'll actually follow up with, oh my god, why are you getting up so early? Oh, you got to get up early. Maybe I should let you go. That's a that's a psychology. Oh I gotta get on the phone with your pan and it's a whole I like that. Yeah, that's a great that's a reverbally, set your alarm on the phone is a way to get
off off the phone. Yeah, although some people they just ignore those cues all together and they just they're oh, I I.
Picked up on it right away. I'm like, oh, that's all fuck. I know what you're doing.
I was like, do you have to go? Maybe? So how great is that you'll use your home your home your home device. I'm gonna use all right, very nice. I like that. That's cute. I'm gonna write that one down. So, when I was in West Palm, one of the things that is that what you call it now when you're jerking off. When I'm in West Palm, that's South Palm.
Oh South, Well, you only have two palms, West and East left.
West Palm or East Palm.
Yeah, I suppose so you could have Northwest Palm if you're at an angle.
I was with Jetski Brian and we were went to brunch and they sat us right next to a table of twenty five women at a baby shower. Brody Brody, David Brody and slices. Have you ever been be I'm gonna talk to mainly the guys in the audience, because I would imagine the women have. But David Brody, what about you? Have you ever been to a baby shower before? I mean, I guess the ones for your kids would count. Yeah.
Yeah, I've been to baby showers and bridal showers where I had to leave after it started. Oh so you know, I've been to bachelorette I've seen bachelorette parties and restaurants.
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that nobody gives a fuck about your baby shower, including the guests. I don't think anybody wants to be there. I think I except for the person, obviously the family having the baby. But I can't see why everyone they have this. It seems like it's like a fake happy like or a fake enthusiasm to be's sitting there like, oh, okay, all we're having it's time for uh, you know, to open up some presents here, you know, let's go ooh
and ah. But but but brody, they take it to the next level. They did some other things at this bat At this party, a woman gets up and says it's time for baby Reagan trivia, and she starts with like questions about the baby, and like, so, who in the family came up with the name Reagan? Was it? And and it's like, that's right, The answer is Lauren. Lauren came up with Reagan the name for the baby.
And all I could pure is everyone sitting there, all the other twenty three people not participating in this, saying like nobody gives a fuck. I hate this, get me out of here. Maybe the people that aren't like the immediate family, because there's a lot of the people that may not even know who Laura is. Who cares what it's If you think about it, if you strip it, if you strip it down, all a baby shower is is a self absorbed moment that you get to have
because you're celebrating the birth of your child. I get it, who hasn't come out yet, But as the anticipation of the child and everyone else is there, I guess there for the food or the company and maybe, but everything turns into baby trivia and things like they do this game where they do the dirty diaper game. They did the dirt You knowed the dirty diaper game? No oh Brody. So apparently it's a thing at a lot of baby showers.
They take a bunch of baby diapers right before the right before the event starts, and they take a piece of melt a chocolate and they put the chocolate and wrap it in the diaper and they melt in the microwave for like thirty seconds, and they have like five different diapers with five different chocolates. So and it's all mushed and into the diaper. Looks like shit, right, but the the idea is from the past. The diaper around and everyone has to smell it and write down diaper
number one? What is that? And it's like, oh, a little peanut butter. That's gonna be a Reese's peanut butter cup. But the chocolate is all it doesn't have its regular form because it's been melted, so you don't know what
the fuck it is. It's just I guys talk about sports, right, So they do the dirty diaper game, so they and then and then they do it game with with where they make the women put on bibs and then drink from a baby bottle and then who yeah, I know about that one suck down the bottle the quickest, and that's the one you're married people. Do people really like this?
I mean, do you get to do does anyone? Is there any woman listening right now who actually says they could raise their hands say you know what, I love going to other people's baby showers. It's the perfect way to spend a Saturday or Sunday afternoon.
I think it's the bonding that women like. And you know, the baby bottle thing with the nipple drinking, that's a fun challenge. One shoot, I don't know if I would I need to, I mean sniffing the diaper thing.
I mean, I don't want to be a part of these reindeer games. No, thank you, I don't know about that. I do get the bonding thing. Listen, Well, I mean when guys go to bachelor parties, you know, there's some underwear sniffing going on sometimes, so it's similar, but it's got nothing to do with any of that. We're talking about baby Reagan. Trivia twenty questions about the baby. About baby Reaganes sounds so much like Reagan, which makes me think of an old old man a girl Reagan. So
we were name Reagan is a girl's name, I believe. Yeah, we're sitting there, we're having brunch, and we're sitting there, and we're right next to it, and we know a guy whose last name was Reagan, Brian Jason, Uh, Jeff Reagan, Jeffrey Jeff Regan. Yeah, successful Uh music music, Uh, programmer for a serious except anyway, by the way, his radio name is Reagan. Oh yes, by his last name. Imagine that.
But I'm thinking, I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there, and we're eating eggs benedict, and we're sitting there like, oh my god, these people cannot be having a good time behind us. This is Territ chocolate exactly. He's not telling you what, sir, you know what I will say. I will say that. I'm good. I'm happy that I don't have to go to a baby shower or even a bridal shower for that matter. I know a lot of people that they have those those same types of similar
games there, and it's the same format. But I can't imagine people like looking forward to those. Maybe they need new games. Maybe they need new games for bridal showers and baby showers and maybe environment, I don't know, maybe they just need to like do what a bachelorette party does and just go travel away, go somewhere and just party or drink or I don't know. The mother's the main woman is pregnant, so she's not gonna go party and drink. That's true. Hopefully let me just rephrase that,
hopefully she's not going with party and drinking. You can't be too sure these days, right, any days? Right?
So anyway, dude, when I was a manager of Red Robin, there was a woman at the bar. I the general manager called a mole security on her, but she was like seven months pregnant, drinking and smoking at the bar.
They're like, you gotta leave, that's crazy. That yeah, that woman they put their baby, I don't know, to your kid. Well, I'm just saying, so it's not these days, it's it's it was always you know whatever, Hey, speaking of brunch slices. You know me, You guys know me fairly well in terms of my spending process, my thought process when it comes to spending a lot of money on certain things.
And you also know that I'm currently not working well Scary and I share Instagram videos all the time of Hey, check out this pizza place, or check out these great desserts. Scary sends me a video on TikTok or Instagram forget which one, And it's for a brunch. And the brunch is gourmet to the hilt, gourmet brunchy brunch brunch. I'm like, wow, this is really fancy. It's the Toyota Crown Special Menu, three course menu in Greenwich Village, Manhattan, at a place
called Palma Alma. Uh huh poll yep slices.
How much do you think the brunch was a brunch little Sunday brunch? Would Scary recommending David Brody go for bunch a Scary. A normal bunch for me would probably be like thirty five forty dollars forty five if it's fancy, person not a holiday person, not the whole table. Yeah, I have a family of five. I'm not going for you know, but I really scary sends me this. You gotta go, Brodie, you gonna love It's great. One hundred
and fifteen dollars a person. One hundred and fifteen dollars a person, brunchie bastard.
What do you What do you want me to do? I send you stuff that that looked well one of these days maybe you aspired to going to a bunch like that. Sometimes I just like, I like the way the food looks. I just send it to you. I don't it's not even a suggestion that even I have you been there, scary? No, have you been there? No, I've not. Oh, okay, not been there? All right? No, right.
It was one of those places where I was like, he's yam, I'd like to actually also, first of all, before we go to our next break, let me just say this to the slices who slid into my DMS and told me that I should take David Brody. I should have taken him to the steak dinner that I went to the other night. I went well, Old Homestead, my favorite very famous steakhouse, I said.
On this podcast when somebody you asked me what my favorite steakhouse in New York is, it's Old Homestead, well on the West.
Side on Ninth Avenue. Yes. Yeah, So I went out to Old Homestead because the other night, one night only, they were rolling back the prices to eighteen sixty eight. It was it was it was actually it was a promo. It was a gimmick. So they gave you so you get your choice of steak. The steak was ten cents, so we all of course got the bone in ribbi. Duh, you have a big ass friggin steak for a dime.
The mac and cheese and a mac and cheese and a cream spinach side was six cents, Caesar salad was seven cents, and the the dessert, which is their cheesecake. I didn't care for eight cents. So basically, you get an entire meal top to bottom. Four do the math on that, and it was prefixed. So basically, you choose, choose your steak, you choose, you know, you get the caesar salad and you get both accoutrema and you get this,
and you get the cheesecake. So all that came out to like maybe I don't know, like forty three cents a person, and there were like four of us. I mean we ate for like a dollars twelve. It was. It was insane. It was. It was awesome. But here's here's the thing. While you're anything like that.
First of all, how does Old Homestead make any money if they're giving away their meal for a dollar fifty?
It was one night only. It was a gimmick. It was their birthday and they wanted to do something that would be a big splash. So so hold on. So about a month ago they made I didn't know this. A month ago they put it out there they were going to do this, and they said there was going to be half the room was going to be reservations and the other half was going to be walkins. Well, I believe as soon as word got out they were doing that, the reservations sold out. And it was from
five pm to nine pm, and all three floors. The reservations sold out in about maybe twenty minutes maybe less. So fuck it. You couldn't get in now. Walk ups day of people were there at ten o'clock in the morning with their families online in front. It was a shit show. It was chaos out there, and the line was down the block are wrapped around a corner for people like just waiting a chance, like being on quotes
stand by to walk in. And they got through about maybe a third of the line before they had to go out there and shut it down because people because the tables were turning and it takes about an hour
to turn a table because you're doing get three course meal. Well, they called me on that Monday last Monday, and they were like, we know, I know it was Monday, and I'll tell you how I know it was Monday when you know what your story Okay, And they said, we want you, Scary and someone from the morning show and maybe a couple of people from the afternoon show to come and to have dinner. So I'm like, okay, great, So I said, I said, I'm the only person on
the morning show that can come. And I thought that Maxwell was coming with Crystal, because well, Crystal and Max will do an afternoon show a Crystal Max will do afternoon show well on New York. Yeah, see hundred New York. So I said, all right, I'll just come by myself and I'll meet Crystal and Maxwell there and they had three slots for us. This is, by the way, this was the PR company that actually got in touch with me to do this, all right, And I'm like, all right,
I'm going, I said, but here's a problem. First of all, I have dinner planned with my other friends at the same time that night, and I said, I said, you put me in a bad situation here. So, as it turned out, my friends said, all right, well if you go to your dinner, go to your dinner with your your radio crew, because obviously the reason why they do this is because they want to put the publicity, so they invite you. So as I'm on my way there,
I'm hearing from Crystal that, oh, Maxwell's on vacation. So we have three slots and there's two of us, and I'm already on my way there. So a part of me this is where the slices come in because they saw me post this on social and they're like, why did you invite David Brody and give him his steak dinner? And I thought about this in the moment. I thought about this in the moment. Here it comes Daddy. I hear, hey, slices,
take it out. You hear Brody's voice. This is exactly how it is, right, So I was I was like thinking, like, if I was to call Brody right now and invite him out to the steak dinner, technically I could take him out to this steak dinner and pay for it. And of course the prices are eighteen sixty eight prices, right, so technically I can get away with saying that I
paid for steak dinner. Right. No, exactly, which is why I didn't call your fucking ass because I knew, damn well, this was not going to count toward the quote steak dinner that you claim that I owe you. Because and by the way, Scary admitted on the Slice Time last week's Slice Time from a few days ago, he admitted he said Greg t didn't buy you a steak dinner either, either, meaning the two of you didn't buy me a steak dinner. Go back and listen if you haven't listened to Slice time,
Scary admitted it. Okay, here's the thing. But before you get David, No, So Dave, who was I was originally going to dinner with. I took him as my guest because I didn't want to fuck him over because we were originally going to dinner, and then Crystal couldn't bring Maxwell. So I immediately called, uh my buddy Will who was coming off of work in the city at five o'clock, and I'm like, dude, it's it's it's a free slot. It's a table for four. Let's go, because it was.
It was actually I actually got the fourth slot for Dave, so it was a table for four that I was being given at the last minute. It all came together. She goes, I got you covered off, bring your extra person table for four, And I said, will you want you want dinner? Come Brody. There was no way a you were getting into the city that quickly and gonna
gonna jump on a dime. Secondly, I wasn't gonna get credit for buying you your steak dinner anyway, because you would have told me exactly what you're about to tell the slices. Go ahead, Brody, What if I took you to dinner? What would have happened? What would you have told me? First of all, First of all, you should invite me to steak dinner, regardless of whether or not it covers the dinner you owe me. You could have just said, say, join me for a dollar fifty worth
of steak dinner. The slices were telling the misteak dinner.
The whole point of steak dinner is that you have to suffer the penalty and pay a lot of money to take me to dinner.
That's fucked. You're getting the same way. The free dinner didn't count. A dollar fifty dinner doesn't count. But it's all said. You get everything you back back bro Prime. You got it also for a dollar fifty. I would rather pay the dollar fifty and have you still own me the dinner I can't get for dollar fifty. But the listeners, the slices were like, no, no, Brodie, You'll let you off the hook. They're like, if you want
taking Brody, you would have taken Brody. He would say that would have dyould said that would have counted?
No, yeah, they're wrong, they're wrong, and would no, that's not what I would have said. See because you still because the whole point of all this was I did something, and I talked about this last week people on Slice time.
People said, well, what exactly. Remind us again what happened to you and your career and how you stuck your neck out and made lifetime enemies of management because you did this for your coworkers, and here we are twelve years later, you still have not repaid me, and you still worked there with the same people who are still mad at me forgetting all you guys all that money. See now, I'm glad you asked me to do for you, But I tried to repay you twice. You couldn No,
you could have just taken. You could have just said I took you. You love a bargain. No, you should have said, bro, you'd love a bargain. Get into the city. You go to All Homestead, your favorite steakhouse by the way, All Homestead. If you remember Slices, you'll remember this because
you remember that show more than we do. I talked about taking my friend for his bird fortieth birthday back in the day to All Homestead with twelve of his drinking buddies because my friends at bartenders, all of his friends and drinkers, and I paid four hundred dollars for dinner to take him to his birthday. It was an old homestead, so it'd be nice to go back there and be even. I'd be even.
I feel like I'd paid two hundred for both times and i'd be even the last time I went to Old Homestead cost me four.
Hundred dollars for only my food night and drink. Which but that's okay because you were only concerned with paying your debt to me, knowing I wouldn't accept that as a debt. You're like that. Fuck them. And here's the worst part. Slices that day, Scary texts me and says, hey, we normally do Slice time at seven o'clock on a Monday. Can we do eight nine o'clock tonight? And I said, all right, well I do want to watch more than night football, but all right, yeah, eight o'clock is fine.
You know how late can we go? I got stuff to do for the radio station.
So then he texted me at seven point thirty two or something and says, hey, man, I'm running by on schedule.
It was Mayhem. I had this thing today. It was Mayhem. He sends me pictures of people lined up outside are building. He doesn't show me what building. He sends me pictures by a building, and I recognized the building in what street it was on. So I thought it was like, it's near Chelsea Market and and it's it's near the restaurant where Elvis took us for a holiday party like five a year, so I knew the street. But he never mentioned it was Old Homestead or he went to
dinner for a dollar fifty. He just says, oh, it was Mayhem, and we were supposed to get seated at this thing we were it was late, we got I got home late that night. I couldn't do We didn't get seated for an hour and a half. Why don't you tell me at six o'clock when you knew you were out and have fine schedule? Never mentioned any of this. Christy felt guilty. Slices, He felt guilty. I feel guilty, prick the more than steak. The only thing I like more than steak is a deal. You cost me a steak,
dinner and a deal. Now you owe me a deal. You owe me a deal. Damn it, Old Homestead.
If you're listening, I've got one hundred thousand social media followers. I would love to promote your business. It's my favorite steakhouse. The seafood tower is phenomenal.
There was no seafood Tower on the menu that night. Well, of course not. They can't possibly give you that for thirty cents holy shit. Yeah.
I like a lot of steakhouses, but I'm pretty sure all the Homestead's my favorite ten cents as far as the New York Old School, Yeah, steak, and they.
Gave you, they gave you the cow outside they do. Oh, I didn't see the cow out there. I think there's the cow on the roof for something. Yeah, yeah, I didn't see it. That's what was missing from the Marquee, wasn't Yeah, I didn't see it. But anyway, they offered the filet mignon, they offered the New York Strip and the bone in Ribbei And then the waiter was like, get the boat in Ribby, you get like three times he met a meat. Bro Do you like three times they met a meat? Nah? Not not. Yeah.
So that's why I'm a fan of Arnold Palmer. Hyo, uh, you make me curse scary, you make me upset? Hey, oh you know what that reminds me though, Speaking of cursing, I have a story for you. You you ever see somebody who does a profession and you're like that, like if you met a mountain climber and they told you they were afraid of heights.
Nobody He's like I want to be a mountain climber. You were like, that's probably not a good profession for.
You, right right, If if you were, if you were, if you had a friend who was like afraid of bugs and mice, and he's like, I think I would have been extterminator, you'd be like, that's probably not a good job for you, right right. So I belong to a comedy comedian comedy writer group on Facebook and this guy, this guy writes, I'm gonna say his real name.
His name is Johnny. You don't leave it at that, Johnny, I'm not gonna tell you his last name. He says, Hey, everyone, is there any chance anyone can point me in the direction of someone in comedy who could help me learn how to clean up my stage act and make it more family friendly. I tend to curse a lot. Any help would be great, appreciate it. So I wrote, don't fucking ask me, ha you you served him a joke right back? That's great. When he writes back, I wasn't
talking to you. I don't know who you are, and I don't need that attitude. Oh my god, obviously he's not a good comedian. How do you miss that? How do you miss that? Hey, I'm looking for someone to help me clean up my axe. I don't curse as much. I want to make it more family friendly. I'm like, don't fucking ask me. In other words, I can't help you because I look, I'm cursing with you exactly. Did you write that in the public forum? Yes, it's it's
in the comedy Facebook page. Didn't anybody like it? Yes?
Yes, people wrote back, like, seriously, you don't get that he was joking. I mean, don't be a comedian. He's certainly obviously he's not a very good comedian at all.
Wow, I mean, I like, it's I'm basically saying, how the fun would I know how to work clean? Right? I can't.
I'm going to see uh, Johnny L on on stage anytime soon.
So, Johnny L? So what is this? What is this forum? What? I'm trying to understand this little world that you have? Okay, Facebook has group pages, Yeah, it's a face group. What are the comedians doing they're sharing like yeah, they're like, hey, you know, I'm looking for an opening act or anybody need an opening act or I'm looking to tour with somebody, or hey, I'm okay it's for comedy writers. If they're actually sharing material, I'm like, no, never shared material, That's
exactly it. I'm like, yeah, what's there to share. There's nothing sharing about that. I mean basically they like to keep this ship to themselves. I thought people were writing comedy on there and posting it. I'm like, who would do that? So it's for gigs. It's for gigs. Yeah, that's whatever, right. Also on Facebook, not a scamboni, and it seems to be people with unusual names, not American style names, let's just put it that way.
And they put up riddles like you're in a Facebook, like you're in a pickleball group. They put up a riddle, you're in a swap site, like you want to sell things in this town. They put up their clickbait, right, they promise you things. So they always do, like, oh, I'll give ten dollars to anyone that could name a state in the country that that doesn't have an E in it, as if that's impossible.
Right, So this is the one that I saw this week. I'll McDonald's anybody. In other words, I guess in English you'd say I will buy McDonald's for someone. I'll McDonald's. Anybody that tells me a state that does not have an E in it, I mean most of them don't have e's in the Nate like Alaska, California, Florida. I mean, it's not like it, but people like get all excited and they start naming states like it's difficult. So beware of those. There's oh, uh, Low's is hiring right now.
Hit me up for information on how to get a great job at Low's. They're just scams. They're just scams by people who don't even live in the country. You click on their profiles and they're like, they don't they're not you know, they're just scams. But the whole oh, you'll never, you'll never, you'll you'll never be able to name a state capital that doesn't that doesn't start with A. It's all bullshit. It's all bullshit. Speaking of scams, scary. I got an email about my serious XM subscription that
it's running out. I need to click here to renew my subscription that's going to run out in a day.
And uh, this is.
The email address that it came from. Because sometimes it doesn't show the email address. You have to click more details.
Let me say, let me say s U S P I c I O n X suspicion x I U U l P l h W l at go E d k O p E k O s t U o U The fuck that? Does that sound like an official email address from sirius XM. Hell's no. In fact, that's the first thing I check. Anytime I see one of these fucking spammy looking emails come by. You look at to check the email address. It's always something stupid.
Yes, here's another stupid thing on Facebook. This woman moved to an area in North Jersey. Okay, she used to live in Brooklyn, which is probably why she You'll understand what I tell you. She wrote, scary are I guess she was looking to meet new people because she just moved there. Yep, are there any ladies living in the Bergen County, New Jersey area?
To which I wrote, no, they're all dead. Of course there are ladies living in that. What she meant was, hey, are you a woman living in the Bergen County area? I'm looking to make friends? Of course what she wrote was are there any ladies living in the Burgen Now? Bergen County is probably the home for like I don't know five hundred thousand people. She wants nothing as any ladies living in that county. That's sort of a dumb question. Yeah.
Then did I talk about the Munster's House? No? You have not?
Are you sure I thought I did the munch of the Munster's House. I'll get back to it that I think I didice.
What did it? Something? Mocking Bird thirteen thirteen mocking Bird Lane.
Yeah, there was a so there was a meme going around of a picture of the Monster's House from nineteen sixty four, the TV show The Monsters, and how it looks today, just slices. Let me know if I talked about that, and I'll if you tell me on slice time that I did, I won't talk about it. And if you can confirm that I definitely have not, I'll tell you about it. But I don't want to, you know, get into it. Somebody?
Hold on? Uh oh, that's the review I read to you, And one more thing I wanted to read. Hang on one second. Oh, remember last week I told you about on Facebook I posted a doll American doll wheelchair. Yes, and I got flagged for it. Of course, So.
Two things that came from that. I called eBay and I asked them. I said, hey, why am I getting flagged and threatened with.
Uh with putting up a toy? It's a friggin toy. I don't understand. What is the problem.
So the guy says to me, he says, listen, the AI automatically sees wheelchair and you can't sell that shit on here.
So well, you got to fix the AI. It's problematic. It's picking up the wrong thing. It's flagging you when you don't need to be flagged. I mean, you didn't do anything wrong.
Right, So he says to me, here's what you want to do. You want to post it. The item is postable. You just can't use the word wheelchair. So describe it in some way, but don't use the word wheel wheelchair. So I said, well, I don't wanders say you mean? He goes, well, figure out a clever, a clever way to explain that. So I put I said, chair with wheels, okay, chair with wheels, And I didn't get flagged. Chair with wheels, share with wheels, So it didn't get flagged.
You got around it. I got around it. So a couple of slices hit me up and said, oh, we saw your post. I'm laughing my ass.
Off because it's true what you said, and I want I deliberately went to your page because I used to live in your town, so I know what group you're in, and I see that it's true.
Yeah. Well, you know, Instagram is fucking with gandhi and they're like shadow banning her for her name. Well, her name is baby Hot Sauce, So will you do search for baby Hot? Go ahead, try that. Everybody slices search babies. Nope, ahead, start searching her name baby Hot. What comes up? Brody? Read it? Oh?
Oh exactly? Sexual abuse is illegal. See I already knew that. By the way, she.
Basically is getting flagged for like a pedophile name or something like that, or.
Child sexual abuse is illegal. We think that your search might be associated with child sexual abuse. Oh god, and you could face imprisonment. No, get me off this type in continue with Sauce. See if it comes up.
No, my comes up after I type baby because I follow her, right, If you don't, then problem right? Yeah? So yeah, so so she's unfortunately being like she's like, wait a second, I got nothing to do with any of this. You can't put two words together. Like, all
of a sudden, it means something awful. I mean, I understand baby hot because it's like hot baby, but that's I know, it's it's a it's a tough one, right because if you if you do, if you search for hot baby, how else would you how would you justify that you can't? Right? I mean, you have a hot baby and baby hot are not the same thing. I know, but the the intelligence on it is not intelligent. Clearly, clearly, maybe someday should happened to me.
So yeah, exactly, So yeah, no, you know what, I I just got you know what, I thank you for reminding me. I I screenshoted it. One of our slices hit me up and said they were having a problem with Instagram. If I could find what they wrote that they got banned from Instagram for basically doing nothing, the same way that I got in trouble on Facebook, banned from the Funny You're Mentioning band from the Graham She said, Okay, so this is from Zig eighty eight ten Broady, I'm
listening to I'm listening to the latest podcast. I'm having issues with Instagram like you are at Facebook. All of a sudden, I start getting flagged.
From messages I post and posts I respond to somebody saying, oh that's awesome. Aw that's cute, and they fucking banned me for commenting for three days. What the fuck? I mean? AI is out of hand? Yeah. And also I see
artists online, like actual people that draw for a living. Yeah, and they're they're saying they're being censored and they're being they're being you know, suspended or put on probation by Instagram because they're drawing like breasts or a woman or you know, the figure of a woman or what can be considered artistic impression, and they're getting they're getting clobbered because they're like, no, censor, censor this. You can't see this.
That's nudity, that's vile. It's terrible. It is terrible. But people are, you know, unfortunately dealing with that. So anyway, So yeah, so there's there's a definite problem with with AI. It'll get It'll get smarter, interpret it will get smarter, I hope. So yeah, with Scary and Brodie, he's beginning getting smarter at some point. Scary I'll get smarter, right, What what kind of question is that? Well?
I think that I'm doing the right thing. I think I'm being nice to people, and I get in trouble. So I got to be smarter and not try to help people. How So I'm coming out of face, uh of Facebook, I'm coming out of Whole Foods.
Wait, David Brodie shops at Whole Foods. That's I do my Amazon return. I never thought i'd see the day. You're a liar. You're shopping at Whole Foods. Now you're who told you I return my That's where the Amazon return desk is, right, it is, I know it is, but that's why I was there. Okay, but I thought maybe you were actually shopping in the Do you ever have shopped there? Okay? There's a sauce called jar which
they only sell there, and it's fantastic. You're always getting out my case for shopping there, and here you are no scary.
I get on your case when you spend one hundred dollars on peanut butter, not because you shop at Whole food That was an accident, okay. And I go for Hole and you paid like thirty dollars to park. So I go to Whole Foods for select items I don't buy. I don't buy produce there. I don't buy things I can get somebody. That's what you should buy, is the cleanest.
No, it's yeah. Okay, boy, you are fruit just you will believe anything. Fruits and vegetables anyway, that's what you should buy there. Okay.
I'm walking out of Whole Foods. And there's a woman in her forty fifties walking next to me, and we're both walking to cross the street. And as we're crossed to get to like leave the sidewalk to cross into the parking lot the park the edge of the the edge of the sidewalk outside the doors right, and an suv comes comes by from right to left, right in front of us, like, and I reached my hand out and I stop her from getting hit by the suv.
Not it. It was going maybe twenty something miles an hour, but fast enough to hit you.
Yeah, And then so I save her, I think, And I got out a fucking asshole because the road is left to right. He's going he's in the wrong lane to be going right to left. So I'm like a fucking asshole. And he stops right past the little with the sidewalk dips to go into the parking lot. He stops. I turned to the woman and I go, fucking Mara. Now he's gonna walk and get out of the car yell at me. Right, he must have heard me, fucking douchebag.
I'm sorry, he almost hit you. And she goes, you're an asshole to me, walks into the street and gets into the suv. It was her car, it was her husband picking her up.
I save her and curse the guy almost hit her, and she calls me an asshole. Yeah, because she was with the person the person who you called up right, Well, that's a loved one who was her husband son, I don't know whoever. It was almost her and I reached out and like whoa, whoa. Yeah, he must have seen her coming out of this store and pulled up. Yeah, I am thinking I'm saving her. It's like the asshole. That's hysterical. Don't help people be smarter, that is what
I'm saying. Well, I had a similar situation as we were online, waiting to get in to the meat factory in the state there. Yeah, there was a woman with a clipboard out there and you know, ear piece, and the sidewalk was jammed and it's it's rush hour on Ninth Avenue in Manhattan, people walking back and forth. My friends and I were standing around. There was a big crowd, you know whatever. Sometimes you know, you have to weave in and out of people if people are standing still
on a sidewalk. Well, all of a sudden, some guy looks like maybe twice or size, she's like four to eleven. He's walking by and walks right up into her, right up to her, and it's like, get out of the way, get out of the way, get out of the way. He had it like shorts and a T shirt on, like he was like finishing coming off of a jog or something. And we're all bearing witness to this, and he's yelling, and there's there's a line of people around.
There's the security guy at the front right, because we were right by the front door, and me and my friends were there, my friends and me, my friends and I whatever. Okay, So he goes right up against her. I was like, get out of the way, get out of the way, get out of the way, get out of the way, like this over and over again. Get out of the way. Now. At first, I'm like, is this guy, first of all, do they know each other? Is it a joke, and then several seconds later I
realized it's not a joke. This guy's an asshole, and he's saying get out of the way. So I was just about to be like, the words are excuse me. I was gonna scream it out to him. But before I did that, I looked around me and I'm like, who the fuck is gonna come to my rescue? If this asshole turns on me for screaming and jumping in the middle of this fight, that is like, like, because I really the guy deserved it. What a fucking douchebag. Sorry, I'm trying not to curse as much these days, but
I just couldn't help it. Got out of the way, Get out of the get out of the way to a woman half his size. The guy, it was a real I wanted to punch him in the fucking face when he said that, and I really wanted to yell, but but I'm thinking, Okay, now, I did have sex on the way. Dave next to me and my buddy Will get handle himself. He's a big dude, and my buddy
Will Will's a big dude. I guess the people that she was working for, which is a security guard at the front who looked like he could handle a couple of people. He was the bouncer with the earpiece in. But I didn't trust the bouncer or my friends enough that had I said something, that I would have been protected because it not. Did you ask them afterwards?
Did you say, like, guys, if I had started a fight, would you have had my back? Were they dressed nicely?
Yeah? They were, because they're not gonna want to ruin their clothes. I just don't know. I mean, I feel like my boys will always have my back, but I second guessed it and I didn't, so I didn't say anything, and I let it happen.
Why didn't you turn to your friends and why don't you turn to your friends and be like, listen, we good.
I'm gonna say something. This guy you could have checked in advance, because he wouldn't. Well, it was all happened. I mean all this was over in fifteen seconds, twenty seconds,
twenty seconds. But he didn't hit the girl. No, But by the tenth second second I was I was, I already re reading the room and realizing that this guy was But then I'm thinking, like, this guy's mentally unstable because The next thing that my mind went to was if he's weird enough to like gether way, get out of the way, get out of the way, over and over again, like a broken record and not trying to be crazy. He could be a lunatic. And who knows if he's like carrying a knife or a gun, like
you just don't know. So now would you would you have? Would you have gone at him if he was second quarter scary? None? No, no quarter scary? But then I feel I felt like, you know what I needed? What would it have gained? What would I have gained? Or what would have come? What positive thing could have come out of the situation had I told him to say that, to say, hey.
Well you you would have defended the woman first of all. The second of all, here's what wouldn't have happened. He wouldn't have suddenly had a life epiphany and said, you know, sir, you are absolutely right, I need to be nicer to women, are ra to people in general. Right, he's obviously a mentally disturbed asshole, or he's just an asshole, and that's not gonna go well for you, exactly. That's not the
kind of guy who's like, you know, what side. I didn't realize the air of my ways, my faux pas is so to speak, right, and I defer to you you are correct. I will go with your guidance on this one. No, he's gonna turn around and be like, what the fuck? Who the fuck is your business?
Right? And it's gonna hit you before you realize exactly exactly and at the very least your friends are gonna pull him off you after your bruised, right, And then you gotta come on the podcast and I'll see your bruce face. You know what, I'll say, that's what you get for not inviting me to a dollar fifty stake dinner. You fuck would no sympathy for you? Would the guy would? Would the security guard have done anything? Though? Because I felt I felt I felt safe because there was a
bouncer right there. But I'm like with the bouncer of god.
No, I'll tell you why you weren't on the grounds.
It was an inn. I was outside the restaurant right you're on the side. I was in the front door right there. We were right there, a vestibule or in front of the door, in front of the door, five feet from the door. Mmm.
No, I mean your blood would splatter onto the property. But otherwise you're on the public street and he's gonna have to face a lawsuit if he gets involved. He's not gonna want to get involved because you're not trespassing.
The fight wasn't on. Like, he's has every right to defend the inside, right, but can he defend the outside? And who is he defending you? Right?
As far as he knows, you're just some jamok who started to fight with another guy.
Exactly, so, in a moment's notice, I said, scary, don't say anything, just let this happen. And of course he obviously, you know somebody. The crowd parted ways, the seas were parted, and he was able to go on his way, and he just kept full steam ahead and kept crowd did in part ways. That means they would have left, no, so he so he left. He went looking to the other side of the He got around the crowd, He got around it. He got around it, okay, So he
wasn't trying to cut the line. He just wanted to keep walking, wasn't it. He wanted to just walk. He was a pedestrian who was walking, and the girl with the clipboard and the microphone, and the and the was in his way, was in his path. If I'm you, I would have punched the guy. Oh yeah, sure you would. Yeah yeah. If I'm me, I'm not doing it. Oh yeah. If I'm you, absolutely yeah, you're a coward. Hey, thanks, I did I got pickleball story slices. What would you
have done? Next week? Pick a ball Boys, Boys,