#301: A Service Dog In A Bikini?

longest one. Our slice. Des Bomb told me that there's some people pretty upset in the Brooklyn Boys facebook page. Why they want free dessert. They're upset there was no episode last week. Listen, this is the episode from last week. We're a few days late. I apologize, but I did give you two bonus episodes already that somehow you've already forgotten the problem exactly. You didn't have to do that. Those were two weeks that we had off and then you just decided to Yes, I worked my ass off

on two episodes and now you're listen. I love that the slices won our episodes. That's the day they don't want our episodes. We got a problem. So I'm very happy. We're sorry we're a few days late. It was a combination of a couple of different things, but we could not record last week, and we're going to try it to get as many episodes in this week as well. No, no, let's not overpromise because we don't know. We can't as

we can. The problem is we gotta do things in order because now we gotta we gotta wait for comments on this one for Slice time. I know, so this is weird. Hopefully people will leave us comments quickly for Slice time and hopefully we'll get a couple of days. We'll do it an major League base on the All Star break. We took an All Star break when stars but back and by the way, scary. Yeah. Those two

episodes I did. I did one where it was a montage, a pote piri of all the three hundred episode songs, and then a second episode where not only did I give you a We're on vacation pot pourri of songs, but I also unveiled a fourth of July song, which I think is spectacular. So I'm wondering which of the two episodes did you like better? And why? What do you like about them? Are you you're asking me? Yeah? From listening to the moment, you like like the transition.

I liked the h well. I like the fact that you uh huh uh. You know it's sort of did some AI songs, yeah, uh huh, and that you uh did some nice commentary around. Did you at least understand the goldfish joke? Yes, I thought it was very funny. You understood it because a lot of people DM me they didnt underst No, no, no, none of that made a lot of sense. That the goldfish joke made a lot of sense to me. All Right, very good. I wish there was a goldfish joke, son of a bitch. Yeah,

I'm glad you got it. Though, I'm glad you heard it. You got it. Yeah, thanks for listen. I kind of thought I was being set up thanks to being a team player of that pal. No, I did listen to a little bit of it. I didn't hear you. I emailed you. You did the pay July song, Yeah, the Patriotic the fourth of July song, I loved Yeah, how did it end? What was the last line of the song, and we'll be back soon? Wow? Nope, the last line in the song was We've kicked a lot of ass.

Happy Birthday, America, you know damn it? Yeah, you told me you loved the song. You didn't even listen to it? Damn it? What do you get? You can't play? There was even a section about Philadelphia, which I played for my friend Kendra last night because she says, I've been on vacation. What do you want me to do? I want to be a supportive like the beach. I'm gonna put on the podcast. You know how brody sounds, right?

I see? I listen when I go on vacation for two weeks, we'll we'll see how your episodes come out that you do while I'm gone. Is that how that's going down? I can't wait. I cannot wait. Wow, I can't wait. Well, we have been away a while, yes, And while we were away, and I'll tell you guys later, I met the stupidest person I've ever met before, I think, or most most incompa most incapable of helping themselves person and I witnessed the dumbest person on the Internet. But

isn't that a weekly thing for you? Will you? Yes? Well, I made the mistake of going on a local town page this afternoon and asking for recommendations. I'm gonna tell you what I what I wrote. I'm gonna tell you the phrasing of what I wrote, and you tell me what you think the responses were to my post. I wrote, looking for a place that you capital letters asterisks. No, so for a fact that serves good Jewish meat stuff derma with gravy, otherwise known as kishka in this area,

and I capitalize this it's a Jewish delicate. I already can tell that you're going to be They're going to offer you stuff that's ninety miles away or hold on. So I wrote, not looking for places to call and ask, I'm looking for places you definitively know serve it. Thank you. What makes you think that they're going to read your instructions and respond accordingly? So I'm not going to get into the names of places, but I'm going to just tell you how they started. Have you tried the blank

blank blank on such and such avenue. Hey, there's a place in Passaic which is like thirty miles from where I live. You know, I'm not sure if they're still open. Have you tried this place in Glen Rock, which is twenty nine minutes away from me? Hey, you might want to try blah blah blah place in town. And somebody wrote they don't serve it, and the guy wrote, yeah, but if you ask them nicely, they'll probably whip something up. And I said, I'm not looking for sudden to be

whipped up. I'm looking for a place that serves it. Oh, have you tried the grocery? They might sell the ingredients. I'm not looking for I'm looking to buy in a restaurant. This item with brown gravy. One person wrote that used to be a place in Fairfield, but they closed years ago. How does that fucking what did you think? What did you think you were gonna get? People don't follow instructions.

You just you ripped me a new one because I was looking for something on eBay and you said, you are the exact person that I rail against every single week on the Brooklyn Boys podcast. Because I was looking for I was looking for an empty bottle. I'm sorry, I was looking for a box from a commemorative tequila all right, and I needed the box. I only want the box. But some guy was selling the box with the empty bottle and he was selling for some crazy

amount of money, so I'm fighting hundred dollars. Yeah, so I'm like, dude, I'm like, I just need the box. So I messaged the guy and I'm like, hey, can I what if you were to pull this apart and make two different bids like auctions, and I'll just buy the box off you right now. I'll do it, buy it now, and then you can make more money off of the bottle. And Brody, will you Because I'm not big on eBay, I'm not a very big eBay guy, so I wanted to ask Brody's you know, he's what

you wrought? You texted me? Yeah, oh god, he said, let's see hold on needs your help and negotiation. This guy is selling a true empty bottle in box with twelve hundred excuse me. I will pay him how much to get the box and he can keep his empty bottle so he can make money off that some context, please, because I don't want I don't want people to think that this is like a boot. I mean, that's a lot of money. This is we're talking about a twentieth

anniversary limited edition expensive to kill it just expensive. I'm just gonna say, you know, it's it's it. I'm just gonna say it's it's a very expensive rare bottle of tequila. I have a full rare bottle, right, you just need the I just want the box. I want the complete set, so I will pay it. I can't keep reading right now. Said Okay, you said that without the bottle, without the box, it's worth a lot of money. With the box, it's

worth three times as much money. He said, how do I even go about persuading him to part with his box? I'm bad at this. He may not even go for it. He's got twenty one people watching it. One person has it in their cart, which means somebody's probably gonna buy it. And then you said he may have more luck selling them separately. So then I wrote, you just turned into every Facebook, marketplace, eBay person I hate and complain about.

You are projecting that he won't sell it, and projecting that he's asking too much, and projecting he should sell them separately, because ideally that's what you want to happen. That's what you did. You tell me this guy's charging too much. You tell me, oh, he should sell him separately. He'll do much better. As if you had any clue if he would do better or not. You just wanted to sell you the box. You're you're every bad person on Facebook. Yeah, but I know, but I just need

the box from him. So he's gotten alert. I's got an alert. What's that? This person told me Costco sometimes sells the Kishka around pass overtime. That's an April scary. That's April right, right, So you're not gonna get straight from now. I don't want it nine months from now. Oh shit? Oh this person wrote me back just now. Also, hey David, if you're looking for definitive answers, this page might not be your best bet. We are a community

group with opinions and recommendations. We are at concierge service. Who's calling you? You're calling me?

Oh love Rich. He and I have friends apparently not. We're going to dinner tomorrow with Josh and me and a couple of other guys. And I guess we never finalized our plans. That's why you're calling me.

ask you to hang out with us now. Well, that makes total sense to me, so thank you.

Remember that story? Oh yeah, from a couple episodes. Yes, so me tomorrow. I can get a lot of information, and I'm gonna did you see that person's Instagram story today? I was about to ask you the same thing. Oh my, very confusing. I'm not sure what's going on. It's a lot going on in those pictures. There's a picture of a h and then there's a picture of him like naked behind a tree lamb yeh or something, and he's with three hot chicks. Did you see the picture? Is

that what that was? I wasn't sure who's wearing that female bathing suit? No, really, because he doesn't show you who's where. No, but I clicked on one of the pictures with his friends. I'm like, who's this And I'm like, this guy's living the life of Riley's gonna get who is Riley anyway, but this guy's living the life. Yeah. I'm like, he's got like girls surrounding him, and he's married and his wife was in the picture. Listen, God bless, I got even more questions than before. Anyway, tell us.

But by the way, you sent me a meme about the second twin getting married the second conjoined twin. Yes, yeah, that's a fake story. Do you ever looking researching anything? No photo shopped into the picture? Is he really? Yes, there's there's not one story on the internet that's just got married. One of the slices sent it to me, and I'm like, how great would this be? Now? What would they do if the conjoined twins the second one got a husband all of a sudden, the internet is

full of fake shit. You have to look at everything or look at nothing. I feel like it didn't first send it to me. I prefer to be blissfully ignorant. But well, speaking of blissfully ignorant, you can tell you about the dumbest person I've ever seen on TikTok. Yeah. Please. So I'm scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, you know, the for you page. I'm looking for stuff, and it's people are yelling about

politics whatever. Yeah, and I stop on this page where this girls her in her room, I guess, And it caught my attention because there was like a it was a funky lamp on her desk, like a lava lamp. So I was like, oh, that's a funky looking lamp for a girl. A girl she looked like she was maybe in her late twenties. I'm like, oh, it's a cool lamp. So let me see what she's talking about. Anyway, I don't know what she was talking about, talking about whatever,

her job, whatever. And in the in the on the wall in her room was an American flag. Now, if you have an American flag in your bedroom, sure you probably are a fan of the American flag. You probably have the word patriot in your profile. You're probably very rah rah rah America. Yes rah. If I had an American flag, which I do, I would hang it in front of my house. But I don't think I would hang it in my bedroom. It's just me. It's in

who I am. But anyway, the one thing I know about the American flag, and apparently someone else in the room knew the same thing. Now, you know that TikTok is usually mirror imaged, right you looking at the shirts are written backwards on the walls, But everything's a mirror image. Are you TikTok Okay? No, I was going to ask, are you about to tell me that they made zero effort to not mirror image the flag so it can

be displayed the property or what? No? No, So, when you when you look at the American flag, a regular American flag, yes, the top left corner is the blue blue and the white distract the stars and the stars you hang it. If you hang it vertically, it has to be on the left side, top left. Yes, right, so you actually are show you turn the flag around and show the back of the flag so that the blue shows up the top left corner. Correct, that'sare with the stria with theys on the top left, always in

the top left. That's how you display a flag properly, if you're going to show respect to the flag that you claim to love enough to put in your bedroom. Oh boy, you should hang it the right way. Well, okay, all right, I noticed, hold on, I noticed that it's wrong, but I don't say anything. And somebody else in the room says, hey, you flags backwards. So she says she reads. She goes, no, it's not. So they say, yeah, it's backwards. The flag is supposed to be in the blue in

the top. So she says, well, you're an idiot. TikTok. Mirror images everything. So then the other person says, yeah, but it looks right now. It's in the top left because it's mirror image, which means it's in the top right. Yeah, So she says, she goes, look, she gets up, she walks over to it, and she looks at the thing, and she says, and she does the thing with her fingers. She makes the L in her fingers, just because she

doesn't know what your left hand is. You know, it's just does the L to make an L to right. And then so when you look at something scary, the left is on your left arm. Right, when you look at it, it lines up with your left hand, correct, yes, right. If you're looking at a picture, the left side of it is the side you're looking at her. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Anybody on the planet would look at a painting or a picture or the American flag, and if they knew their left arm was over here and looking at it on the wall, they would say, the blue is in the top left. She then turns around, puts her back up against the flag, does the L with her hand, and says, the blue is on the left. Well, my left arm is you're right, all right? All right? Wow. So I chime in and I say, look, I don't want to get involved in this, but I'm getting involved

in this. The blue has to be on the left as you're looking at it, not as you're standing in front of it with it behind you. Your left arm is your left arm, but it doesn't mean it's it's still on the right side. The fact you turned around doesn't she change the fact your flag is backwards. You're an idiot. You don't know your left from your right. I'm like what I said, the flag. Go google an American flag. The blue is on the top left corner. I said, I didn't care that much until you told

the other person they were wrong. Scary. Who does that? Who looks at something and then turns around and then says, with it behind me, that's my left and right? An idiot? How can you trust her if she's making the left with her hands to make an al to figure out left? Ok? Okay, is this is this what you did for three weeks? Is this the highlight of your three weeks?

I'm calm man. I'm just telling you I got involved because I'm like, this is good stuff for the podcast. It's great stuff for the podcast. Well, that's not the dumbest person I spoke to this week. I'll tell you about her later. It involves changing attire, but we'll get to that later. I promise I do have another dummy for you. Can I throw in a quick dummy? Yeah.

So on on one of the Facebook pages that I belong to, one of the towns that in the area that I belonged to, somebody put up a picture of an ugly looking bug that is I want to say, ninety percent orange and then has like bands of black and white around it, but it's mostly orange. So somebody said, anyone know what kind of bug this is? I found it in my kitchen. So one person said, welly don't you just google image it and you find out what it is? So I said, I know a lot about bugs.

It's a trumpepede t r u m p e p ed e like a centipede, but a trumpepeede. Because you know Trump is orange, Well you love him or not? Everyone says he's orange. So I made a joke that it's a trumpepeede. So this guy writes back, who would ask the original question? Did you make that up? I just googled trumpepede and I couldn't find any bugs with that name. Oh God, you are I love I love you engaging with complete strangers. Yeah, he's googling trumpep beeede.

He's looking for a trumpetbead. So I spent my time off a line. Yeah, my entire vacation was offline. Yeah, tell you know what you have to tell us about your vacation and what happened with Uh, with your surprise party with your friend that you liked him? Do we talk about that on Slice time but not on the book?

line and Sinker had no clue. He was confirming with me right up to the very minute, We'll going to this party. I can't wait, can't wait, taste all those rare bourbons. We show up surprise, everybody was like, you know, they got him good, and he's he's you could never get this guy, you can never get him. And after you know, he went around the room to like set hello to everybody, there was a little bit of a you know, hey, you know he came over. So this

wasn't a bourbon event. But thank god, his business partner put together a special drink. It was a bourbon drink for him for the night. It was a special so he got a special No, it was like basically if he wanted the Jay the Jason Bourbon special drink. It was a signature drink for the night for his birthday. And of course they did have of high end bourbons available. He made they made sure that they paid for the premium,

top shelf open bar. So much bourbon was had. I mean, it wasn't the tasting he was looking for, you know, on the level that I might have been able to give him with you know, this quote expensive ticket. But all fun was had by all. We had a great time that night. The following night, I went out with his brother in law who was for his bachelor party, and I was talking to some guys and I met this dude who tells me that he decides to install a urinal in his house. What he goes, Yeah, he

goes the basement, that's my man cave. He goes, So, the bathroom right there, because I ripped out the toilet and I installed a urinal. What yeah, next to the toilet. No, a commercial urinal, like an actual So like, whoa, let me get this straight. You walk into that bathroom. What's in there? He goes, Yeah, it's a half bath, it's a there's a urinal and a sink. And he's got a wife and two kids. Talk about selfish, so they can't use it. They can't go down they can't go

down there. And he was the bathroom that's he goes, well, this is my space anyway, this is where I played. I have my poker games down here and everything. So I'm like, but isn't it Let me pull back here for a second. Who does this? Who installs a urinal in their house? Is it instead of the toilet? I like, I know people that have urinals next to the toilet. Is it a little tacky though? To even have a urinal in your house? I mean to make that part

of the conversation tacky. It's got it is tacky. It's a urinal. You find them in public restrooms. You don't find them toilets. You find them. You find toilets in those same restrooms. Why is it tacky? It's tacky. If you put it in the kitchen, you're like, oh, next to the French you're taking a link. I get it. But in the your bathroom, my problem is he was too cheap to put it next to the toilet. He

replaced the toilet. He replaced the toilet. That's something. There was no room, There was no room for it, so now you can only do half your business in there now. I think I think he didn't want his friends taking ships in his in his house the poker because he plays poker down there. And he has his friends a little if you go over there, then gonna go upstairs and do it. It forced, It forces his friends because he was it in your bathroom bedroom. Someone might leave

a fucking dump and his uh in his urnal. That's why I had to on the protest. And by the way, I've seen women peeing urinals at football games, So female slices. If you've peed in a urinal, leave us to talk back. Yeah right, any woman who comes over can't use that basement. It's off limits. But he didn't give a ship. Well, well he can't. Now you can't. Now you can't even take can't now? Yeah, Hey, do you have the sound that I sent you? I do, got a lot of

stuff here. Well, I want you to play one clip for me, but before you do, Scary Uh. I was watching Family Feud and it got me thinking, who would Scary have on uh if you were going to be on Family Feud. Now, before the episode, I asked you to write down the four people you would have on the Scary family. Oh boy, yeah right, And it's just it doesn't matter who it is, you know, but read the list of the people. Now, I'm sure you have some of your family members on there. You're probably your sister.

Who do you have on there? Who's on the list? No, no, wait a second, Hold on a second. You want family feud? The aim was to win, to win family feud, right, Well, sure, you want to go on and win. Why what do you ask? Because I hadn't putting out one family, one actual family member. Oh no, it is no one in your family. You'd think it's smart enough to take on family feud. Well, they're smart in a different way. Well, I picked my family, is me? Yeah?

because he's a fan. Why he chose me? But you know he's a font of knowledge. Yeah, No, Nate's a very smart guy. I was just curious as to how you picked him over your other coworkers. You must think he's smarter than Elvis, and that's not and now here you think about it? If it's family feud, not jeopardy. So family feud is more of a common sense game, right you want to get You're trying to figure out

what one hundred idiots answered that question? Right? So maybe I should have gone the other way with this and picked my family. No, I'm kidding, o, kidding, I just don't see my you know, my father, you know Tony, Tony, He's not gonna show me schoel that it's the top five names of cause, right whatever, Anthony, Yeah, right, yes, let me tell you why? Okay, why are you asking me this? This is the Yeah, the clip. Do you have the clip I sent you that says a family,

family feud, Family game show family. Yeah, play the clip and then I'm gonna ask you a follow up question. This is how everybody on every game show introduces their family. Go ahead, who is in the VIP section?

didn't hear I wouldn't use any of those adjectives on you. Sorry, all right, but yeah, I wanted to see how you introduced your family. I love the fact you didn't pick anyone on your family. Your brother. Your brother's brother's smarter than you think. They would be upset if they find that out. You think you're smarter than your brother. Ah, well, he's a computer nerd, he wins. He went to the world.

That's what I was asking. I feel like maybe you should ask him, all right, and maybe I'll kick myself off and let them go on. You know, your brother's coming over your apartment later, right, Yeah, he's coming over. You should tell him that you did not choose him for family feud. I'm gonna let him know. He's got to pick up this computer behind me. Oh that's not the one you're giving me, is it. Huh? Are you

no longer giving me that computer? Huh? It's been well, it's been sitting here for like two months, Brodie, and I was at your apartment like three days ago. Yeah, but I saw you. Yeah, but you didn't mention the computer. Obviously you don't want it. I do it. I didn't want to ask for it, but he said you were giving it to me. Oh my god? Like that now? Oh my god, could you tell me you were giving me the computer? You're like, Brody, you can have it. I was like, yeah, but you took it. It's been

sitting here for six months. It's not six months. It's two months since you been here for six months collecting. But only like two months ago you said I can have it. He' said, oh, you have to come up wednesdays. I was over your house a few days ago. Downstairs. You came down to give me stuff. It's all right, I'm giving it to my brother. Yeah, I see that. Yeah. Is he also going to dinner with the other prow from Z one hundred. Hey, I'm speaking of ZE one hundred.

Can I tell you a story about I want to tell you about this this So I was on the phone with an old friend and he's like, hey, you know, you guys moved to a townhouse. I said, yeah, you know, we're in the townhouse now. He said, has anyone recognized you? As you know, David Brody from Z one hundred or Elvis dran or whatever. Right, I said, no, I have to tell you nobody. Nobody has recognized me. It's great, it's a nice game. You love that. You don't like

being recognized. I like being recognized when I'm outa in plock, But when I'm walking when i'm you know, like walking to go get my mail, you know, yeah, when I'm out there, you know, out and walking in the city and someone's like, I brought it. I'm like, fantastic. It's nice to be recognized. I said, you know what, I've been living here, like, you know, five six months now, nobody's uh, nobody's recognized me. It's been great. That day, I'm walking out of the pool. My hand's wag, I

got a towel. I'm also dripping, and this guy comes up and he goes, hey, yeah, that's how you doing. He goes, uh, you're brody, right. I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. My son listens to you all the time, loves you. And I said, oh yeah, well your son listens, but you you recognize me. Yeah, we googled you. We saw you and he thought it was you, so we googled you. Yeah, that happens a lot. I said, Oh, I said, people see us, they think it's us. They I'm not sure

if it's us. They go to the Google. So I said, I, well, okay, I was a little thrown, but I'm like all right. He's like, yeah, yeah, he loves you. On the show, this is every day. I said, Well, to be honest with you, haven't been on the show in two years, but all right, thank you, tell your son thank you is reality. Yeah, I said it was great, you know, nice to meet you. Yay. So okay. So I'm like, okay, well somebody recognized me. All right. Two days later, I'm

going back to the pool. Now, you guys may or may not know this, but in New York up until recently, Greg T, the Jersey Kid, used to work down the hall from ZEE one hundred, where our show originates from, at a radio station called w k T you yep. Now I've never worked there. Greg T worked there, but I don't work there, you all know. In New York, I worked at SE one hundred.

the yo like in Brooklyn. It's like when we were growing up. People go but it's a mister Greek cadillact. Myself, I don't like that. Yeah, you know, I've been that several times. That's happened to me over the over the past twenty And he's a nice guy and his son is nice. Don't get me wrong. He's very full loved. They get excited. Though, they get excited, they start already get out private life. And I don't work there. It's like, no, if you'd been like mister Brooklyn boy, and what I'm

like you talking about the podcast, it's fantastic. And but and of all places, where were you at the pool Sea where I live? Like, right, you're in your your right where you live and you know you're maybe your shirtless, you know, and you don't want to be identified, while your shirts wouldn't be the issue. Okay, I can't place. I've been working out.

day it's a crowded Saturday afternoon, he's already. I think he got the hint. He's out there and you you see him from a distance. Are you gonna double back and not go to the pool because you don't know an o sky. I think he got the hint. I gave him the old dick snay with face and the hand by the neck move. You know, I think he

got the hint. It was just very funny that not only was he you know, trying to out me, right, right, Yeah, he's wrong, and you know what I mean, stay in the right station, like at least you're gonna out me, like, be right, you know rule number two. If you're gonna out someone, be right. So so weird man. Traveling with my family. That was the second leg of my vacation. Oh the ones you won't have on the game show with you tell them about that.

to happen for us to do something like that. But we're enjoying each other's company, you know, we we you know, we did that trip to the Dominican Republic back in February. And now this was this was brought on by my dad. It was his idea. He's like, come on, let's go, We'll go for a week. I'm like, okay, And it felt like old times. But you know, there's definitely a generation gap between my dad and and my sister and I. You know, my father's a very my okay, my father's

a very plain guy. You know, he's very He wakes up in the morning, he's like, all right, I don't want no fancy breakfasts. I just want my eggs, a piece of toast McCall. And you're like, Dad, I hired a chef. He's coming in. No. This was DJ college chef back in the high him. He's great. So we wanted to go to so my sister and I, Dad, I hired Katy Perry's massuse. No, no, no's gonna come

in and give you all massages. No, we want to go to the French place that had croissants, you know, my sister and I. You know, and and one day, you know, there's a famous sister me right, And one day there was well there's this other place. Is there's this chef that is a famous chef. His name is Daniel Ballud. He's got he's got a place called He's a Michelin star winning chef. I know who he is. Yeah, well he's got a place in the Bahamas at called Cafe Ballud. So I wonder how he got that name.

So my sister we decided, look, we got to go there one day for breakfast because my for three days in a row, my dad was like, we were going to this random like diner, short order place. And I'm like, guys, we're on vacation. I don't want I just don't. I just don't want like Jimmy Dean sausages, and like, you know, you know, call me boogie, call me crazy, but I don't want that. I said, I want to do. We want more. And then my sister and I and me whatever,

all you're right there. Perfect. So the last day, my father gives in, he goes.

food is better for you. I don't know, maybe it's a ruse, but we it was just a weird dynamic because my father sat there, he let us have our way like the brats that that we are, and and you know, but but it was, it was it was crazy because we're just we're trying to convince him that, you know, the food that he grew up on wasn't you know, isn't as good a good quality as this. The new ideas and things that they have out there

now the better. Remember when when you bought your father a garbage pailot opened by itself, and he's like, Anthony, wh I need you a garbage pail to a garbage and Anthony, yes, your father is a man of simple means. He doesn't need shtick. He doesn't need fancy schmancy. So did he like the eggs better? What's the what's the result? The result was he felt there was no difference. We thought we had a better meal. Me and my sister were looking at each other like, yeah, this is great.

You know, we were getting like, you know, like our eggs, benedict. You know, we were getting like some fancy like croissants and things. And the coffee was even better because it was like one of those press coughe And you don't think French press, French press. I don't think any of this is just in your mind. No, well, I'll tell you. They make a good case for it. They because you feel how much was a breakfast, then how much was

it was eggs. I would just say that breakfast there was thirty percent more, thirty percent more than it was at the basic eggs and bacon place at my father. But the other thing is, it's like it has to be more than thirty percent. We're on vacation, and we're on vacation with our family, and look, well, don't you want to relax and just order off a nice menu that offers like avocadolax I wanted to eat at the

hotel and that. Oh but I want avocado toast, you know, I mean, oh my god, I want your girl from TikTok from ten years ago. I want buttermilk pancakes, you know, or the oh you know they do fancy like brioche or lemon regatta whatever. I'm into food, man, I like I like when they pay attention to detail, even the jellies, even the jellies, Brody, we're different, okay. And my father's

bacon and eggs joint, you know. It was the plastic Welch's thing where you peel back the freaking cell of the fane and what was the jelly like it the fancy place did they scrape the jelly out of the Welches package into a jar? Fie. The jelly was in a fancy glass jar and it was a preserve. It wasn't a jelly, Brodie, Oh did it say welch is on it? A snooker's on the jar? It wasn't. It was. It was like one of those French brands that they don't get. It's not high fruit, those corn syrup it's

all there. You go with the fructose pectin and and and a little bit of cane sugar. And it didn't have a label on it and an ingredient like yes dalfour d a L f O U R and it said no pectans. No, it was like no added sugar or very little like some little bit of cane sugar. But like it said that it's a real fruit. That was real fruit, like the strawberry that was coming out straw real strawberry, like the seed there was seeds in it. Like,

I'll take the Smucker's packages. Baster was like, I'm trying to raise my kids with better food, better quality food, and and we like this. And my father's just sitting there and disbelieve, shaking his head. He goes, and where would your brother eat because his sister now seems like she's a boogie scary too. Well, my brother wasn't with us, but he would, you know, he'd be fall somewhere in between. But the thing is, it's just a divide between is a generation gap between you and the guy who's a

generation before you. But that's a big it's a big generation. He's a boomer. But you know, my sister and I were trying to convince him that that everything that he knows and remembers is wrong because of the way, you know, we've moved on, we've moved on with you know, we know more now about what we're putting in our bodies. I guess they had fancier eggs when he was thirty. He liked his eggs from the place with the egg like you like the cage free, pasteurized organic brown eggs.

Why do you care that birds in the cage or not. As far as the taste, I want to be humane. I just feel like no, I just feel like it's more. I don't know, and it's not a maybe it's not a taste thing. It's maybe it's I feel like there's doing better for me. I don't know. But I think you're like the person if they were offered a BMW for twenty thousand, you'd never drive it. Now that's not me, No,

I don't. Someone said like, oh, there's a new BMW, it's only twenty thousand, but like, I'm not driving that piece of shit. I gotta have one for fifty because you need to know you spent more. I get it. I don't want to. I don't want to. I don't want to come off sounding bougie.

clip from a commercial for a restaurant. Is the opposite of Bougie, the complete opposite of bougie, And I want your opinion on it. Scary when we come back. Okay?

before we get to this clip. Oh no, you want to play one clip because I have a special another phone call surprise. But you're gonna love because you just this person. Okay, hold on, before you get to the I want to make sure we have time for the stupid person. If we don't have time for the stupid person, I want to apologize now, no, we did. We did we do? By the way, speaking of special people on the phone, I want to give it an apology. Three hundredth episode. We should have had Spruce on and we

did not. So I apologize to him already that we we didn't work it out time wise because we recorded at the time. I knew he wasn't available, but we should have had him on. So shout out to Spruce. We know we love you. We'll see on the four hundredth. All right, who's coming on the phone? Now? Oh what about the sound? We're gonna play a clip. You just told me you were putting someone on the phone who would take a break shop. No, I got somebody. I

got somebody. We're gonna talk to you real quick. And this this really is there anyone on the phone. I might enjoy talking to this person here? Yeah, you're gonna love this person. I I why are you calling them? They didn't call you? Yeah? I told I told her we'd call her her. Yeah, it's our it's our friend. We have lots of friends. Yeah. Hey, it's Astra. Oh hi, I haven't talked to you and like for so long it's been ages. Yeah, Oh my god, it's like two days.

Astra she, oh, she could get a kick out of your story, mister k T you she works for KTU. I already told the story. That's okay, now, well another time for that.

audience we were. We were down at Asbury, you know, in Asbury Park, hanging out at the hotel. And then Astra's like, well, we're down here too with our friend I Naz from Channel five, this fantas Dan New York with Rosanna Scato she does the traffic, and and my girlfriend Robin and and Astra and and they were, you know, they were like, hey, we're coming over to the pool

and she She's like, I'm gonna bring my service dog. Oh, I want to talk to you about that exactly all these pictures holding a dog, I thought, like, my god, is the dog alive? But here's the best part. It's a teacup Yorki and Astra brings her dog. But what's the name of your dog again?

hating on her word? Because I feel like if it's a service animal, right, it should be dressed like a service animal because it's there to service purpose for whatever. Then they be wearing like a nurse's outfit. Well, I just have a stethoscope around its neck. What are you talking about, sky, What does animal look like? What should have a shed, have an orange like glow in the dark vest and a construction helmet. It's just weird because you're talking about a teacup Yorky with a two piece

bathing suit on to prefer one person. And she was going with the I guess she was going with the theme of the afternoon. But I feel like, if you are in need of a service animal, and again we're not asking why because it breaks hippo laws and all the other stuff. It doesn't brek hippolaws. You're not her doctor, Okay, then whatever, but I'm not asking. Uh yeah, but so she she has a service animal, I feel like it

needs it's it's uniform. And and that's what would the uniform behold on everybody, it's just a scary tell us what the uniform would look like? Well, it has to happen. The uniform has to have that that the reflective padding around it, and it's a service animal on across his body.

Somebody yelled out, hey, is it colicky? Is that true? Because that's what you ask somebody said.

gonna be in a hot bikini. And if I know Astra, she was looking good, I'm sure she was. And you know, uh, why wouldn't you want the dog to look good? You're taking her out in public? And if the outfit on the dog also brings you comfort because you feel like, look, how nice I've made my dog look, then that dog is providing a service by looking good, providing comfort to the owner by looking good. Therefore it's doing its service. It's like it's like arm candy. If you're a billionaire,

you hire arm. Can you get a woman who's hot? You know, whether she's uh, maybe she's a day for the evening or maybe she's some like gold digger who like you want a young hot wife, right, a hot dress.

The dog's purpose not to help her reach things. So you you would agree, though, if you see a seeing eye dog, you know, dressed in a freaking cop uniform for for Halloween, are.

in helping her with her anxiety. They dressed the dog up like a Disney princess. They she's she's she's h let's say she's Bell. They put a little yellow outfit on her and she's like, oh, it's my little dog. Her name is Bell, and we dressed her like Bell from Beauty and the Beast. And that makes that little girl less anxiety ridden. Is that okay? Yes? Then stopping a dickt out, I'm coming around because whatever it is to analogy, whatever it takes to to calm her anxiety,

I guess, I don't know. It's just it just looked. It was a little weird to me. I wanted to just get you on the podcast to talk about it real quick. It's okay, you know I love you and I love Nyla. All right, So let's say, let's say it's a it's a wounded warrior, an American hero down this road there's no winning for me and we and they have a service dog. He doesn't matter how big is it. Maybe the is pitning me up against the wall.

Here go ahead, you wish. And this man, as a child, he had a little poodle and now as a wounded war veteran. They've provided a dog for him because he's an American hero and he needs help, and this, this giant standard poodle is his help. And he likes to put the dog with a little camo, a little camel, little camo handkerchief around his neck, maybe a little you know, uh, a little camo vest Is that? Okay? Of course it is. Oh, it's only Astro. That's what I'm here. You want to know what I think.

hundredth episode. Come in merch. Very excited for this, Brody, you got the three hundredth episode T shirt, you got the hoodie and ladies and you know, skinny guys, you've been asking for it. The tank top yeaes this summer. Yeah, the tank top returns and you might notice the three hundred in the word Brooklyn. That was mind I designed that.

Thank you. It's pretty awesome. So limited supply, and of course, Brody and I will sign every piece of merch between now and July twenty sixth, right, even if you buy other merch besides the three, we'll sign it. But you know, buy the stuff now while it's on sale, because after the end of the month, I'm pretty sure it's all gonna be gone. Scary about the website, yeah, well you know what it is, bright now it's Brooklyn Boys dot Bigcartel dot com. As my song said, that's Brooklyn Boys

dot Bigcartel dot com. If you want to do some sound, we can do some sound. Yeah, let's do that all right? Tell me what what you got and I'll tell you. I'll set it up. You got it, all right, let's go to buns. Okay. So you know how sometimes people on television are told to say something funny and they don't know why it's funny. They don't get it and they're just dorky and they shouldn't be doing comedy. Uh. This guy was talking about thet the Nathan's July fourth

hot Dog Eating Contest. Just play the clips. How awkward he sounds, Sun's out and buns out. I I can't stand that. It's the hot dog eating contest. So there's buns out and buns out. But he's like, I don't know why I'm saying it. Why would you say that? Why would you say? I don't know why I'm saying this, but I'm gonna gohaing sake, becau, I'm talking ahead, clearly, clearly making a pun. But you don't have to reference

the fact that you made a pun. Or and then he referenced, like you don't know why you made the pun. He's like, I don't know why I made the pun.

the corner of sixth Avenue. And I want to say, it's like fifty third Street in Manhattan. Want to say, it is one of those one of those carts and they have the words sandwiches lit up in neon lights, going crazy, But it's sand wishes, sad w I s h E S. Brody. I kid you not. Six months ago, I was stopped at that light. I looked up. I'm like, aha, he's a spelled wrong sandwiches and it's like wrapping around

the truck in lights. Sand wishes, that's that's Brody. Six months later, same light, did you look anything to the guy trying to help him? Look up, it's still there. Brody's the word sand wishes is rolling? Okay? How many thousands of people have seen that sign and that misspelling in the last six months, and anyone David Brody he would have gone up and said, you know what, The guy would have said, I don't know, that's what he would say. He would have of course, he would have said,

not my card. I don't know. So then why But this guy is in is an English speaking voice over guy say and sandwiches? All right, all right, I got I got practical one. Oh okay, so practical This guy. First of all, this guy, for some reason, he can't say z's at the end of words. Okay, but then he uses a word at the end of the sentence that isn't a word, so he says, like, but God played a clip is a disease. I don't know these.

as we're recording this. Thank god, I'm taping it. Now listen to listen to what he says. Go ahead, play mad Dog Russo.

on MLB networks about Granger. Okay, So at the end of every commercial for Granger, it says call or click Grainger dot com. Play the clip and I want to ask you a question about it Grainger dot com.

not a Mexican place, it's not a Spanish place. It's the Golden Corral. It's it's the low end buffet that's all over the country. Sure. Now, don't get me wrong, I love the Golden Crowd. I mean low end, Like, it's not expensive. It's the kind of place your dad would go to with me that you wouldn't go to. Okay, Now, in this commercial, now scary if you and I were at lunch with someone who said, Hey, I'm gonna have some mozzarella, we might say it's mozzarella, right, We would

correct them gently. Right. So I want to get to picture this commercial. There's a family of I think, two young girls and a mom. They're all Hispanic and a and a white girl would freckles. Okay. The white girl says the name of the food she wants, and these other three women attack her, attack her and make her say the words the way they want with an I love, I love a good accent. But listen to the commercial and see if it wouldn't rub you the wrong way, if if these were your friend.

You're like, oh, I didn't realize that's how you pronounce it, but they might as well have taken a bat to her head. No, it's economys. Yeah, I just want to go get my five pounds of mashed potatoes and my endless shrimp and some other shit on a plate. Leave me alone, don't attack me like I heard the first time. The whole five family members are like, it's conon me. Holy shit. You gotta see that. You gotta go on Twitter and read the comments that the people of tweeting

a golden corn. I love it. I gotta see Marshall. Okay, so I want you to hear this. I'm gonna play me talking. Listen very carefully, listen to my voice.

and it spit out that shut up. It made me talk, It made me read like made me read it like a three or four sentences, not those words. And you typed in those words and typed and yep. Hi, my name is David. I'm from Brooklyn, New York, and sometimes I get a little bit of a Brooklyn accent. Holy sh I'm a comedy writer. And let's see how well you can replicate my voice. We are that is not me. We are fucked. People are gonna start taking us and making us AI. You realize this, well, that's what I

just did. Anyone who could take our off them, You could teach AI by taking our audio off the podcast and make us say whatever you want. That's dangerous, extremely dangerous. And thank you for giving that weapon to the slices. Thanks for giving This is not new. Deep fakes have been idea. I'm telling you, I finally tried it myself, and I'm like, holy shit, that's me. Holy shit. To me, that sounds just like me. Does this sound like the

Brooklyn Boys Beastie Boys song that we did? That we well, before you play that, I promise you slices, I'll tell you about the stupid girl I met at Target. Next episode. I apologize. Okay, boys, Boys,