#289: Stop Touching My Bush!

a little shop pot. I bought twenty tickets. I thought I thought I had a really good shot. You know, that's in our listening. You thought you did. I was like, oh, I got twenty ps. I gotta win. I will say that I'm thinking we if we don't know someone, the person that won the slices of all of our listening audience definitely knows the person who won. That's if the person has the person even come forward yet and been public about it. I don't think. I don't think they

can have. But Root sixty six. There's a shop right right there, get your kicks there and nip to New Jersey. That's where it was sold, the winning ticket. What do you mean by right there, right there on Root sixty six. Oh, the shop right, Oh, the shop right, shop right sold the ticket. Yeah, I go to shop right. I live in New Jersey. I didn't win, No, but it's okay. You know there's always there's always mega a power ball which is coming up right. I got that going for me. Yeah.

I texted my wife at like, uh, three o'clock, four o'clock in an afternoon whatever it was, and I said, hey, we're six hours away from being multimillionaires or whatever the time was. She's like, oh, yeah, I'm preparing. I read stats on this. There's just six nine trillion to one. Oh it's awful. It's the worst odds ever. But we still spend their money.

to someone and she was an office worker. She always chipped in, always three time, and either she was out sick or whatever, or she came in late and they didn't get her money and she was out and they're like, but I'm always in. See you weren't work that day, No bullshit. See. I think that if if you're always in, then you're part of the crew. And if you forget to put your money in this one time and that's the time, you win. Personally, I think they should they

should split in Italy, yeah, because they're always in. Usually you can't say always in. Usually they're always in. They're always in. But in this one time, this one instance, they filled fault was that they were out. They forgot. Well, then you know they forgot. Maybe they were like, I'm not gonna win. I'm saving my five bucks today or twenty whatever the chip in was. I don't think deliberately. What if they deliberately were like, nah, I'm gonna take

a week off. Then when they won, they were like, oh I forgot. I think they're deserving of the ticket. You throw them a million for for no, for being a good support. Now I'm not giving up eighteen million or whatever it is. Come on, man, you don't think so, you don't think this is a good it's a good play, like that's a person karma. It's good, it's good luck, it's good. Just what karma for? You just won the lottery? So you know a piano doesn't fall on your head

when you will leave your building. I don't know sitting run over by a car. I'm just saying. You know, you treat people like shit. It comes around, you go around shit. How do you know they honestly forgot? And more importantly, it doesn't work that way. Can imagine going to Atlantic City and you're playing blackjack and you have a seventeen and a dealer show in a twenty and you wanted a hit but you didn't, And then the next guy gets a four and you're like, oh, I

meant to hit no really they did? They go, okay, yeah, you seem like a good guy. You meant to hit. No problem. Well, in our office where we work, we all agreed. Scotty agreed. Yeah, we all agreed. Yeah, I believe.

every night. In fact, I don't think I paid now that now that you mention it, oh, now that I well, if you didn't pay, you have to chip, you can no, Actually, now did you say, I'm sure Brody would like to chip part of the Brooklyn Boys podcast. We can call him Scotty. Scotty is the king of the latter the ticket hold on. Say, I just a quick question for him, because I want to let him know I'm in. I really hope he answers. We call people blindly on this podcast.

We don't warn them. Hey, by the way, we're gonna be giving you a call, and as we wait, this shows you what he thinks of you. He is not answering his phone. Yeah right, he's gonna hit the fuck your button on me. No, he's letting a ring. No, he's just gonna do it, all right, Well it's Scott.

to Scotty. You're out and you forgot, I give you. I'll give you something I'm not giving you. If I we all win eighteen million, I'll give you one. See that's shit. But shit is seventeen million after I've been a part of this pool every fucking week, and the one week that I forgot to contribute, you're not gonna give me. It depends on what you mean by forgot.

Were you in the office sitting next to everybody, or you downstairs in the mail room when the money was going I think Scotty sent out the group text this morning, tomorrow's powerball. Oh yeah, see nine o'clock this morning. Now, I was on the air right and I didn't see this text. Tomorrow's power ball is nine hundred and thirty five million. If you want to give me ten dollars, somehow, get it to me somehow, and then you have a shot. Now, if I would have forgotten, because I'm gonna s I'm

gonna vemo him now, so I don't forget. If you already bought the tickets, you're your sol. Well that's why I'm calling him to make sure that I'm in on this dead Text him and he'll floor, he'll flow, he'll flow up this bullshit. Front you the money. Now, I'm gonna get text it that you're in, and he'll if he buys the tickets, he'll pay pay the tickets for you money. Powerball. Good done, Scotty B finished over done, then mode all right, great, Now I'm in. Is Elvis playing? Yes,

Alvis always plays all the time. But my point, my point was, if I would have forgotten, you're not going to catch I'm not going to catch a break. We were the group where there's ten people who always put in if Scotty went around to everybody and then one person was like in the bathroom and he forgot to ask them, and it's not their fault. Absolutely cut them in, Okay, I would need to know the circumstances. It was the person standing there and they just were like, I'll give

you the money later and then forgot. Then that's fine. They agreed to it. But if the person works in the other radio station and they were supposed to come down the hall and give you the money like clockwork every Tuesday and they forgot, I think it's a larger conversation. And I do think that, all right, I'll speak largely. No, it's a larger conversation, and it's more of about a pattern of behavior. If your pattern is that you've always participated.

Have you participated like every week for seventeen years? Yeah, all right, all right, so then you're agreeing with me. But if you only chip in like once every five months when the when the jackpot is high. Yeah, and by the way, why do you guys al why do it's human? People have asked this question before. Oh yeah, why does everybody chip in when it's one point one billion, but when it's six hundred million. No one's like, no, one needs to be bothered. It's the same odds. Never

mind the odds. You're like, yeah, I don't need to bother for six hundred million. It's not worth my trip to to the grocery store. I think it's because of the advertising around it. It's the marketing, you know. It's more of No's like, oh, it's up mega millions, up to nine hundred million. Now, now that's a threshold. I want to win four hundred million. It seems yeah, you're right,

you're right. And more importantly, if less people play, you got a shot and not having to split the prize there is lightly met although although they go weeks without winners, if in these contents, I know, I know that's how that's how it extraordinary it is. And if you're a type of person that looks and goes, hey, number fourteen hasn't come up in eight weeks, I'm gonna bet fourteen. The machine doesn't know it hasn't come up in breaks.

It's still the same odds, same ods, or like, I don't I don't want to pick three numbers in a row. The machine doesn't know what balls are coming out. There's no heightened odds of sixty seven, sixty eight, and sixty nine coming out versus one, three and seven or whatever the numbers are. I'll space the numbers out. It's nothing to the machine doing. He's texting me. I'm in the car with Cooper and I'm not really sure what you want to talk about. Just tell him you're in. He's driving. Yeah,

I hope, he writes back, Fuck you you're out? Oh no, oh no, I don't want to. I don't want to be the other guy I was calling you. Yeah, So then let him get on.

sent to pictures of the numbers. Yeah, you know what. Brodie's a a guy that if his wife didn't chip in and he won, she wouldn't get half the half the money. That's the kind of guy he is. Yeah, you know, you know, legally i'd have no choice. Scary, right, you can't. Well I didn't know that anyway, you know the laws.

don't feel like coming into the city. Is well, I don't have a car. I can't come out to Jersey by you. How about we meet where the train goes to Jersey. What don't we meet Hoboken? How some pizza. It's a great place to meet, great place, Hoboken once once train stop out of the city. Boom right there es centrally located. Well essential, yeah, for where we're located, or for where you guys are you live in Long Island? It's not so essentially no, Yeah, anyway, So I say,

you know what, let's go to Autochoke Pizza. You know you know how. I love the owners, I love the company, I love the vodka Sicilian, I love the regular Sailio pizza. As we speak, Yeah, you had it this morning, had this morning. So I say, I look up and I see that they they open at eleven. I'm like, oh, well, we're meeting at noon. Let's just meet there. They'll be opening at eleven. We'll get there at noon. Perfect. So I I drive over to Hoboken. I find a parking space.

He's waiting outside for me. We go in and the guy, there's one guy working there, and he goes, no pizza for a half hour. I said, what, no pizza? Well, yeah, because they open it eleven, right, and then it takes them the the hour and a half. Yeah, because those pizzas take a while, you know. They they take twenty five minutes to a half hour, or they have to they have to heat the ovens up. Sir Bury. The guy came in late. The guy overslept. It was obvious

what had happened. He was still like he wasn't like there wasn't pizza in the oven. He was still like kneading the dough in his hands. That's why he said that no pizza for a half hour. He must have gotten there an hour late. Maybe he didn't set his maybe he set his clock back too early, like three weeks too early. That's pretty shitty. Actually, if you're open for business at eleven am, you need to do the prep work before you open the doors. You get there

on time, you get it. You gotta be there like nine ten o'clock getting everything ready. That's exactly right. And you can't tell me they sold out of every slice of pizza. But no, no, no, no, they clearly didn't have anything ready, right, So hardly disappointed. So I'm not going to tell you where we went, but we started walking on Washington Boulevard Street, Washington the Street and Great Great Street Restaurants. Was this yesterday? No, No, a couple

of weeks ago. Call me, you're in my neighborhood. Yeah, I was out with a friend. You don't know, so what you're in my neighborhood. You got to give me a call like, yeah, it's scary, I'm close. I didn't want to hang out with you. I was hanging out with him. Yeah, but I mean, you're in my neighborhood. When you drop by, you should actually get the area. How many times have you been in my neighborhood and you deliberately call me and go, dude, I'm at this

gray restaurant in your town. Dude, I'm at the catering hall around the corner from your house. You've done that so many times you never once say like, Hey, afterwards, I'm going out to a bar. Why don't you hang out?

pizza place. How bad could the pizza be? Well, first of all, before you stop right there, I already knew the answer. We'll stop right. I know pizza can be not great. Uh yeah, Well, before you even go any further, I just want to say this. You could you could have called me at least for some pizza advice, and that could I slice apped I checked. I knew you should have gone to this one of three places to go. Uh but okay, which one did you go to? H I don't want to say their name? Why not? No,

they're known for having a giant slice. Oh I know, I know the one you went too. Yeah. And first of all you go in, it's dumpy as hell. Well that's the charm of the place. It's been sixties, so it's it's nineteen seventies dumpy. Second of all, everywhere is very nice. But I was like, I say to my friend, hey, listen, this place is known for the big slice. I had it once like ten years ago. It wasn't bad overrated.

That was ten years ago. Yeah. Right. So I saw there's like a sign up with all the topics you can buy. I was like, oh, well, you know what, you got a sausage slice ready? No, no sosage slice. I put the sausage on for you. So I was like, uh, that's when they take the raw sausage and throw it on a already cooked, sitting out all day pizza. Ah. So I got a giant slice of shit. My friend

got a giant slight. Put peppers or mushrooms of some vegetable on there, and it was like, you know, it was like eating when listen, when pizza is good, I don't care if it's small, large, medium, I'd rather have you know, but what a pizza is not great and it's huge, that's twice as bad. Now you've got more of not great. So the whole time I'm sitting there going you know whose fault this is? Don't you auto choke pizza? Oh yeah, because the guy was slept And

I'm telling you autochoke pizza. I'm not again. It happens people oversleep some of the best pizza on the planet. I'm gonna say this, find a location and go. I'm just saying I ended up with bad pizza because my intention was to have fantastic pizza. Well you could have called me number one. Number two. Google ratings are your friend help not so much. Yelp is just a bunch of fucking complainers. People just get on there just to trash a place. Google reviews they're all complainers now too.

I will say this. I will say this Google rate if it's Google ratings versus Yelp ratings on food places. The Yelp people are a bunch of bastards. They're people. Nobody's specific. It's just a certain kind of person that I don't want to associate myself with. That leaves these scathing reviews on Yelp, Yelp, Yelp and slices if you're

a Yelp reviewer. But I do think that Yelp tends to really downgrade and downscore places for petty bullshit, Whereas if I'm looking for a good spot with awesome atmosphere and amazing food, I think the Google ratings on those are a little bit more true to life and what makes you what what gives you that impression that anyone on Google is because I know it's on atmosphere five

hundred to one thousand. If I see five hundred ratings on a on a restaurant and it's a four point four or above, I know I'm in a good spot. Four point four to four point five is great, four point six and four point seven is rare. And if you could find, if you could eat, I don't go to four point four's. You should no, because that means a huge percentage of people gave it a one or two. I'm not going down no, not to no, no, No, did would you buy something on eBay from somebody who had

an eighty nine percent rating? No, My my barometer is usually four point fives is where is where it's at for me? Okay, a four point four is an eighty eight rating out of one hundred. I tell you this right now. You're not going to find many places. Most places you find are four point zero and above. You don't go to four point ohs forget that. No, no, no,

you don't. And if you see a three, get the fuck out of there, run the other way, unless it's Chinese takeout, because everybody complains about everything with Chinese takeout. But if you if you have, but the place also has to have sustain that over several ratings. So if you have nine hundred and you've maintained a four point five, four point six, even four point seven, you're in a very special place. I can tell you this right now. But I still go read the negative ones first. Well,

you don't need the review. You don't get granular and read reviews. At that point, you just you can't. You search, but you shouldn't. It doesn't to me. It's like that's one person through. One person had a shitty experience and then you know they put that on the note. You know what happens. A lot of times you'll go look at the negative ratings and they'll say, I've been coming here for twelve years, and since they sold the place six months ago, it's been terrible. You got to check

for that shit. Sometimes you see a great rating and then you go to like, oh, it's on the new management. You didn't know and now it sucks. That's why it went from a four to eight to a four to four. And you're thinking, wow, they maintain a four to four. And I do the research and I see that they had a four to eight they dropped to a four to four. There could be that, but I'll say that a nah. Listen, I'm a food connoisseur. I'm a bie. I'm a bougie bastard. Yes, I get very and I

eat a lot. Yes, And I will tell you I go out to eat a lot, I get a lot. I'm very very particular, and I know my ship all right when it comes to that. I'm telling you now, I'm telling the slices this. You listen, take this advice the way you want whatever. You could listen to Brody, whatever you want to do Chinese takeout. What I'm saying is this if if you go to a restaurant, I'm just generalizing for the moment. Okay, you never if you look at a restaurant, it doesn't have to be pizza.

It's a restaurant that you're going out to eat. Don't open up YELP. Open up Google Maps, okay, because Google Maps has the ratings, has pictures, has the website, has everything and has the on it. Okay, So so go open Google Maps. People, listen, Google cans know how Google works. Right, open Google Maps and type of place, use your finger and four points. And then if you see a restaurant that can sustain a four point five or above with over let's call it four hundred raising ratings and above

for reviews and above. Honestly, those places right there are really special places, and I will go to them sight unseen. If I see a four point never had a bad ex never zero, never, No. Because if I see a four point seven and it has eight hundred reviews and it's able to sustain a four point seven over eight hundred reviews, I know, for shit, sure it's a great spot. I just want to measure they have fire the chef for the new owners. I've never gotten stuck, never gotten stuck.

You know, every time someplace changed his owners, it goes right in the toilet, right. But you're not banking on that. You're banking on the fact on that. If I'm checking one hundred, check on it. But yeah, that's it. But all this is minutia. Okay, dude, I'm broadstroking. Man. You should have gone. Dude, I don't want to see you doing that. We're on a podcast now, You're a dick. So what you would do? What I'm telling you right now is this, Okay, okay, okay. How many reviews are

you giving a broken pizza? Okay? Now, this is what I would do if I were you, I would have been in the Hoboken I would open up Google Maps. Here I am Hobogan Beats. I did Google Maps. I will short by places. I would filter four point five yeah, and above four point five. Okay, mm hm m that okay. So the places that are listed were boring the rest of the country. I'm just taking me no, but people are.

What I'm saying is but people can apply this to their restaurant and the locals now they totally get it. They all got it. Slices. You're with me, you get it. Ato strata amazing four point five. I see that place? You didn't see it? Did you slice place? I have to go buy a pie and sit down. Okay, Basil's four point Oh guess what? Okay? I didn't go to buses because it's the same. Yeah, and there were no chairs and basilies is a rip off of a choke. Pacilis'

not going there. Okay. The one you ended up at is a four point three with two thousand reviews. So by your sense, it's close, wouldn't go what you said it's close. I would go to I would have go to the tenth Street Pizza or Flower that wasn't near either of those. Let's move Okay, we move on. Don't oversleep. I'm one of my pizza. You could have brought some pizza home for me, you know I would have come

to your house and gotten it. You know what the sad part is there was a ballion out a three or four whole pies still sitting there on the counter. Dur anymore. I would have taken a pie home like I always did. You should have done that. A real friend would have taken it. But what am I going to see you out? Pizza? I would have been there in a hot beeat. Oh is that what it's gonna take for you to come to my house and autograph these t shirts that we owe the slices? Hey, listen,

they just got to your house yesterday. Yeah, I got time, all right? How much time you got? I said, I come Monday? All right, Monday, Monday. It is all right, scary and Verdie, you got my sound clips by the way, so a few. Yeah, by the way, if you did send, if you're waiting on your order, I just got the shirts yesterday or two days ago, now, yeah, and uh, here we are. So I'm gonna sign them. Berdi's gonna sign them. We're gonna have a signing party together. Berdie's

gonna bring pizza for me. We're just gonna bring over some lunch. You're gonna bring pizza from one of your highly raded pizza places. Well you're gonna no, no, You're coming with my house, so you're gonna bring me food. Oh no, no, you're gonna have pizza ready for me because I'm making the commute. I did the hot pat of a seconds and tolls baby, you're gonna come to my house empty handed. No, I'm gonna have a I'll bring a fork and a knife with me, not for the pizza, just whatever else

you might have. I'll bring my own sodas. I'll have to drink your five year old diet coke. It tastes like metal. So hopefully by the end of next week, you guys will all have your orders fulfilled. We see you, We see you. Yeah, so you have my sound clips. Do you want to talk about my awful home selling experience or the story that's gonna offend people? I think we should do a little bit of all right, shout out and apologies in advance to anyone listening or anyone

who's friends with or related to conjoined twins. I can't imagine anyone fits that bill on this on slices, But we have questions. Not looking to be offensive, we have questions. Scary one to tell the story because I've got questions. Yeah. So I was scrolling through Instagram today and I realized, oh my god, remember those conjoined twins that they had on Oprah back in the nineties. Their names on Oprah they were, of course they're conjoined Abby and Abby and Brittany.

Abby and Brittany are conjoined twins, all right, and they they're famous and then we actually had a reality show based on them. Uh, they're popular anyway. The thing is they share they share every organ below the waste right above the way, two hearts but whatever. They do share a bloodstream, they share a blood stream and everything. They have one button one hu haa right, I guess they have two. They each have a pair of boobs, Yeah, they do. They got four, yeah, because we don't know.

We don't know that they can have three. We don't know. They said above above the waist anyway. Yeah, but that's not all. So the news has come out and according to social media, that conjoined twin, Abby, just one of them, is now married to an army veteran. And there's a picture of Abby with her arm around her husband. The problem is Britney's arm is also around her husband. Well,

we don't know that. We don't see it. Well, actually I have a picture that just has one of the pictures I had not from the side, it looked like both their arms were both I mean, if you're gonna

hug them, you gotta hug with both arms, right. The problem is well, there's a lot of questions here, and again we don't want to offend anybody, but Bertie and I started talking about this off the air before we got on here, and we're like, well, well, I have so many, so many questions, starting with Okay, first of all,

is it possible for just one to get married? I guess so because they consider two different people, they have social screty numbers, they're all right, so then yeah, but but what if the one on the left wants to save herself for marriage and they only have one hu ha, then the other ones having sex with.

another guy? Now what do you take turns? Like the Asian Siamese twins in the seventies, they had two families, two houses. They would take turns whose house they lived in? But again, like, okay, I don't know any questions. Let's say, for instance, the one that got married, yeah, is engaging in an oral activity with her husband. That's what I'm saying. The other one is right there, it's right there now,

So does this guy get two from one? Well, that's that's the ultimate head, I guess, or but or that would that be considered chet him? I don't Is he cheating on her with the other one? Look, I don't want to get crude, but you know, and and why did this guy go down this road? Was it for that reason? I don't know what he went down. My point is, look, he loves her, I get it. But what if the other one hates him? She might He's always there, he's right yeah, And I mean, is that

a threesome? Is the other one involved or she's not right? So look, I'm not making fun I God bless them. There the inspirational people. So Abby one of them, well, Abby controls the right side, Britney controls the left, so her right hand so yeah, so so she might put her right arm around him to hug her husband, but the left left arm doesn't hug him because she's like, she's not married to him, or if she does, does she does the sister feel get jealous because it's like,

get your hands off my man? But what if he's pleasuring his wife and the other one starts feeling pleasure? Does she say to us they share everything below the waist? Right? Well, okay, here's another question. We're gonna go there. Oh boy, what if the husband wants no boy something special for his birthday? Right, and he's like, oh, let's try it over there, and the wife is like, yeah, let's do that, and then

the sister's like, I don't want that. That's an exit, Like who gets to you have to like talk it out, like I'm not into that. I think I am into it. By the way, this is what if? This is? What if he's messy and messes on both of them? Like is this? Well? I will say I definitely acknowledge that the sister gets a free honeymoon for the conjoined twins. Definitely, I'm okay with the day them pronouns on that. Yeah, but it's it's they them, the two of them, it's

two people. Yeah, yeah, that's actually that's actually works, that actually works really well. Well, let me ask you another question. What if the sister decides she wants to identify as a man, they no longer can join the Oh my god. So that's why we have so many questions. There's so many questions. But are they addressing this? I mean, they had a reality show, but I don't know if I don't know if they're gonna go What if one of them wants to go to a nude beach other one

doesn't like? How do you work? I don't want to know about the wedding day? Did both of them wear the dress they had to? Yes, they both wore the dress. I don't need one of them wore a veil. One of them wore the veil, the other one. They wore a dress. Okay, Now does he carry them both over the threshold? I have to you know, Hey, what if one of them wants to shave like her legs and one doesn't. There's a problem there. How do they think about basic things like like clothing? Well, what if they

don't want to I don't like that. I don't like shure they've worked that out? Yeah? Did they compromise? But how did they work out the stuff that we're questioning? And again, we're just I just feel like, did that make it fun? Abby? Just? How did they work that out with him? That's a great question. What if she's like, I want to go on a date tonight, the other one's like, I got a headache. But Abby also sabotaged

her sister because now she got married. There's no hope for her sister to get married to someone else because she's there. Well, how is that? How is she gonna get married to another guy? You pretty much you fucked me. You fucked me because now literally you got married, and now I'm not. Well, let's say another way. Your husband always here. Let's say let's say let's say another guy marries her. Let's just say, okay, all right, he marries the second one. I've got crazy visuals. Okay, he's married

to the second one. If the second one has sex with the second husband, that guy is also having sex with the first guy, exactly. And does he have a right to get jealous? Exactly? I don't think he's got any rights in this case. I really marry how you

just can't marry her? Huha, that's my who ha, that's my wife's who a. I think he's just got to roll with the punches because he's signed up for this, and he's like, you know what if another guy comes into the picture, literally for for her sister, I guess I'm gonna have to deal with it. He has no say, he has no say over over their body. What if the first of her but they have sex Thursday night and the second one is like, it's my birthday, I

want to have sex tonight. Do they take turns? I I had to have worked this out because there are separate They are separate people would have that. You know, they have two heads, two brains, right, two hearts, so honest. One one is in love with the guy. The other one has her own set of values and her own thoughts. So what if you're watching television and your sister gets into a fight with her husband. She wants the storm out of the room, but you're watching TV. It's a lot.

I give the sister all the credit in the world for well get along with this. If you want to attempt to answer any of these questions, leave us a talk back on the iHeart question. I got one more question, never mind the husband, serious question. When they go to the bathroom, do you think they have to decide whose turn it is to wipe. Absolutely, they do because one of them, because I did it last time. So your turn, right, fascinating,

fascinating so but but more importantly the marriage thing. Good for them, congrat well, good for her and the guy. Congratulations looking forward to this on slice. Okay, I can't fathom being the other sister and the guy's there all the time. Now this the other sister getting married definitely through a wrench. Sleep in the bed with that now, yes, she does, whether she likes him or not, with her with her brother. What if the guys like, I like this on the left side of the bed. No, not

her brother in law. That's right with you, brother in law. It's a brother in law, brother law.

they're conjoined. Well, I'm saying, if one of them wants to stay on their back and the other one's like I'm resting here, I just I can't. If one of them is asleep, like, oh my god, don't wake me up for this, I can't. I can't wrap my head around it. I can't. I can't. I mean, I guess you're in an open relationship, but you're not. And again, if if if you guys as Siamese twins listening slices, I apologize. Siamese conjoined twins, same thing, Siamese and conjoined

to the same thing. Yes, not but cats, but yes, really I didn't know that. Yeah, you will look that up. Conjoined twins maybe the new nice way of saying it. I don't know, Arah originally was Siamese twins. If that's offensive, and I apologize. So now I'm wondering how many other couples like this exist in this world, because I've seen twins married twins, right, No, Yeah, but what I'm saying is no conjoined twins, another set of twins that aren't conjoined. Oh,

but conjoined twins marrying conjoined twins. That's probably the best matchup that you could have. Yeah, but what if you were in love diagonally, Like what if you fall in love with the one on the left, but you're on the you're on the right. No, no, you're on the right. There on the right, but when you face each other, you're both on the right. That means you got to

come in from behind to line up. I do you imagine, Like if if right guy meets right woman and left guy falls in love with left woman, when you face each other you're diagonally across, you couldn't possibly make that work. You'd have to be behind them. I'm just my mind is going so many places right now. And by the way, if you look, if you look at a few places, anyone, anyone who posted this story on a major publication, just go right to the comment section. Don't even because the

comment section is where the comedy is. Folks. All right, if you have questions that we that we haven't thought of, it was to talk back. Yeah, if you have answers on what you think the question to question, you're a conjoined twin and you have an answer, please bring it on. Thank you the Glen Boys Podcast. We will be right back. I'm still reeling from before. I can't believe we covered that. I was half joking when I said we should we should talk about it, And now you're like, no, let

it rip. Well you and I was split on it. Well, Hio, Oh, unlike them. You think they do the brody and scary, scary and Brodie thing like we do. Oh hey, it's Abby Britain and Brittany. Pretty Abby. It's happy and Brittany. I'm married one now. Oh god, Oh, we never got my dad on the phone. It's Easter Sunday coming up in a couple of days. Well, it is who You didn't want my sister to wreck her oven. It's the dumbest thing, your father's theory. It's like people put plastic

on the furniture and don't use the furniture. You want to get him on the phone, but I want to talk about my home selling. I will do that areas okay, So let me see if I can catch me forget No, we'll do that after we get Tony on the phone to what are you calling me for? Anthonay, what do you do today? See full answer he usually does. Maybe I'm watching reruns along and.

couple of things I want to get off. The old chest here for a second. Number one, the old chest hair. Yeah, the old Chest hair. I did a podcast, did a Marvel we can check my Twitter. I did a Marvel podcast where we reviewed X Men ninety seven.

twenty years ago. If you don't know what the jar Rule Duets are about twenty years ago, Christine Aguilera released a song and then it wasn't a hit, so they added Ricky Martin to it. Four years ago. So I did a bit called something duets, and I had I had Ricky Martin being added to like other songs that Christina Aguilera sang something like that. And then jar Rul was added to an Ashanti song. It came out and then it wasn't a hit. They added him. So then I did a duet about I did, so I had

him adding his vocals. The bit was like, if you like jar Rule added to Ashanti, then you'll love jar Roul duetting with everyone. And I had him like, you know, we played clips of real songs and he would be like, well would I be without you? And I had him like I had a guy who sounds like jar Rule yep in our comedy studios come in and do and jar Rule up like four or five songs. And that was jar Rul Duet's two. But it was like duets too, not jar Rul Duet's two. It was the second duets

bit I had done, and it was so popular. I did a duets three of duets, four duets five, and you know, Elvis played them all the time and they were very popular. And every time, every like couple of weeks, I would do another one with new songs, and I you know, and he would do holla with songs that made no sense to him to be on rock songs,

slow ballads, Kelly Clarkson songs, whatever. Anyway, unbeknownst to me, in two thousand and four, two and whatever it was, fifty cent came out fifty cent and G Unit and they put up mixed Unit. Mix tapes were these cassettes that you'd sell on the street or or CDs, and it would be like your work or other people's work, and you'd sell it for five bucks to get your name out there before record labels, before Spotify and iHeart

and everything. And somebody gave him all of my jar Rule duets, so he found them online and he put them on there because he was feuding with jar Rule, so it became like jar Rule disstracks. I didn't know this until years later. They blew up on YouTube and everyone's like, where's jar Rule Duets one? And they all think fifty and his people created these. Oh no, the white Jewish kid from Brooklyn created them. So oh Adam Marvinz from the Beastie Boys. Yeah, exactly. So if you've

you've loved them and grown up on them. I wrote and produced them, or I helped produce them. I didn't actually work on pro tools, but I worked with the singer and I was mine. Okay, all right, So I would like to clear the air if you grew up listening to them and jar Roll, if you're mad, I'm sorry. I happened to like jar Roll very much. There's no

offense meant, but they were meant. They were put on the mixtapes as offensive and everyone gave Fifty credit like he's a comedic genius and he is a musical genius, but he had nothing to do with creating those. And I played them for him and he's like, oh man, I didn't know that was you. So Fifty and I are cool, but I'm just letting you know that that was me. Next, I need to be able to go live on the Brooklyn Boys TikTok account and David Brody

TikTok account. Yeah. Why, I would like slices we have. We have a lot of slices. We give a lot of slices. I would like you to follow the Brooklyn Boys TikTok account, which is at the Brooklyn Boys. Yeah, and I would very much, even if you don't you know on TikTok that often. I would like you to follow David Brody twelve on TikTok, and while you're at it, follow at Skier Jones on TikTok because I am I am like bringing up the rear. I was late to

the party on TikTok. I got like no followers on there. Yeah, you can't go live unless you have a thousand followers, so we need to up up the Oh shit, I got more than that. Yeah, I have a few hundred, but I had accidentally I had left it on I'd have to approve friends, not like anyone could be a friend, so I'd lost a couple of years of that. Anyway, speaking of social media scaring, and I have an idea. We haven't finalized it yet. We haven't worked out there.

We're fleshing it out, fleshing it out, and it involves a little bit of money. Uh yeah, but we want to see if you guys are interested in it. What we thought we might do because a lot a lot of people what they do is they'll do like a bonus episode and it's only available on Patreon and got a pay for it if you want a bonus episode. Scary and I are too lazy to do a bonus episode. Lazy Little are too busy. But too busy is what

I meant. We also don't really at this point, you know, want to charge you for an episode, because if you don't buy the episode, you're like missing part of the story. Yeah right, However, we thought it might be fun. Let's say we record the podcast on a Wednesday at the seven o'clock by nine o'clock, which we never do, right, it goes live by ten o'clock, Maybe goes live Thursday night. Maybe maybe we announce hey Thursday at nine o'clock on

Patreon or Twitch or somewhere. We're gonna put the episode up at exactly eight o'clock East Coast time. Whenever we say times, it's always East Coast time. You guys do the math. And this way, all you guys can log into the chat room at the same time and hear the podcast in real time and interact with ore the slices, and then as much as we can, Skeary and I will jump in for fifteen twenty minutes, interact with you guys, listen along with you, answer questions. Yeah, which we can't

do while we're recording because we'd be distracted. But this way, you're all listening and like all you talk backers that the Slice timers you could talk to we each other, you can interact. Oh hey shady jew, Hey, what's up? You know, Steve from from the Bronx, what's up? You know? As long as it's not like an opportunity to curse

at us, that'd be great. Well, we wanted to know all your thoughts on being able to chat with Gota slices and then you know, have us pop in an into yeah, because because the thing it's going to be tricky is because everyone's got a different schedule, right, which is the beauty of our podcast is you can listen whenever you want, so yeah, but when you want to be available, we're wondering if, yeah, like an evening or like on a Wednesday night, you know, if we can get something like

that going. So we want to garner I'm sorry, we want we want to gauge your interest, gauge your interest in that. And and because it's Patreon or Twitch, yeah, we have to give a percentage. Do not, by the way, don't leave talkbacks on that because that's going to crowd up Slice Time. Why don't you send us a a d M to the Brooklyn Boys account. Yeah, at at

the Brooklyn Boys podcast your thoughts. Oh no, you're saying email us No, I said no, no, at the Brooklyn Boys on Insteagram right at the Brooklyn Boys No, right right, you said you know me and you know me and scary and that's proper. In the spot way, it'd probably be like a dollar, yeah, just so we can cover the cost of the platform and whatever. So it's just the thought because we'd have to do it on another platform, like like a Patreon or something. Right, we have to

set up a Patreon account or whatever. So let us know if you if you're into that idea where you could live chat with the podcasters with all this with us and with the slices and listen all at the exact same time so you hear the jokes at the same time. All that, I'm going a couple of pieces of sound, yeah, and then I got to get to the selling my house story. What are the two pieces of sound? Well, we have, uh, we have Louis Taxis

here and what's the other one the startup startup? Oh, this is the commercial where the guy's talking about, uh, going to a bank and he's talking about the startup companies and it sounds like our show. Yeah you want to hear it. Yeah, he goes or boring, makes vacations, happened early intirements and start ups start up? You do this, yeah, and start up, startup. Yeah. Okay, So now this guy Louis is it?

He was in big trouble. We're gonna take your house, Yes, take his house, garnish his pay. He hasn't paid his taxes in eight years. Sure, and this company is like, will help you out, Louis. Fuck eight years? How do you not pay taxes for eight years. That's awful. He's called. I can't believe you're gonna garnish for my wages. Well, but you had an opportunity to give your wages on your own. You didn't. What are you expecting? You're lucky. You don't owe money to a loan shark. I didn't

pay fat Tony and in eight years he broke my legs. Yes, yes, that's that's what Tony does. That's what that's what. But here's a company that's gonna help you out. I didn't. I didn't pay Jimmy the Shark for seven months, and I owed him five grand for my lousy bets. He stabbed me. No, Jimmy the Shark stabbed you. No, you don't say Hi, we're we're we're uh, we're uh. Where the Bookie where Bookies Incorporated? Did Jimmy stab you with a knife? We can help you out, Hey, Jimmy don't.

He doesn't know you any moneymore? Okay, no problem. Yeah, I didn't pay my taxes for eight years. Listen, slices, I'm sure one of you is guilty of this. There might have been a reason, but for the most part, eight years, hey, years, they were gonna go wag. How they're gonna get the money that's done purposefully. Well, oh yeah, if I mean, but some people are getting over their head with credit cards and things, and you know they're looking for debt consolidation. That's I'm all about. I'm all

about that stuff. But you got you gotta pay taxes. You got eight years. This person deliberately did not pay taxes for eight years. Right, And look, I understand maybe they have the money the first year, second year, third year. You you got to expect it. Eventually, the government's gonna come for the money. You're driving on their roads using their fire department. They want the money, They want them money. It's like, you know, I got a lottery ticket for

eight years. I never chipped in. Hey hey hey, hey, hey hey, that's a different scenario. Yeah, hey, fuck Louis is my point? Yeah, all right, thank you. Right, we were just flying along here today on Good Friday. Oh by the way, don't say happy Good Friday. People know happy Good Friday. Let me explain. Good Friday is the highest day on the highest holy day on the Catholic calendar. This is the day that I guess Jesus got nailed to the cross. And he died. So anyway, yes, no,

it's not a happy day. You do not know that happy. This is the day happened. This is the day that he died and rose. He rose, Yes, he's red. You has to correct you. No, no, no, but my point is now three days later he rose in Easter Sunday, we celebrate. That's right, he rose. That's the that's the happy holiday. Good Friday, Good Friday. Good good Friday is a somber holiday. It's also the highest holyday on the Catholic calendar, the highest. Yeah, good Friday. Anyway, Yeah, it

would be like Jews a young jump kapoor. You don't say happy, it's m kapoor. But America is say a young kapoor. It's a day of atonement when you were repent. Feed this, Yeah, you don't eat you fast. Yeah, it's a day of like punishment, happy kipper punishment in the camp. Tell people have an easy fast. You go, I hope you have an easy fast. Well, I'm not supposed to be eating meat today because it's a good Friday, but

I already ate pepperoni pizza, so I'm dead. Anyway, I saw that artificial intelligence has taken it a step further. Everyone's worried that AI is coming for your job, they're taking your jobs away. Well, AI is coming over the border. Well i'll tell you what. I think that there's one job that it's coming for. And you got to be careful if you're do this for a living. This jockey, well that too. Uh mosus professional massuse because they're saying

that the artificial intelligence it knows you so well. I mean, it does like a scan of who you are and where your pains are. It'll get to know you so well that it will give you a better massage than a human possibly could. And it doesn't tire. It doesn't tire, it doesn't tire out. It doesn't you know if somebody, let's say, you like the eighth customer for the of the day for a massuse. Now listen, I'm not trying to like throw shade at professional messuses, but just know,

massus is assus. I I don't mean to throw shade at you all, but just know that I this is one of those things that can probably be replaced. What I see is, uh, it's an arm. It's like a plastic, a rubber arm. I don't know what it's made of with like like the shape of a hand of sorts, almost like a like what Barbie World would be like. Not you know where Ken doesn't have a penis, but it's like the shape of one. It's kind of like

a general a mannequin type thing. Right, So you lay on the you lay on the bed just like you would in a massage situation, and this mechanical elbow and arm and hand comes down and we'll give you a massage. And it knows the type of pressure to apply. It knows where your your spot the spots are on you that you know because it has done a scam on you to see where you need it most, where the

knots are. I'm willing to bet by the way, I've been obsessed with wanting to get one of these since you know we at the beginning of a sentence as in not going to do it. Come on, you wouldn't trust artificial intelligence. I've seen West World, the original movie on the TV show. What if the robot goes bad and crushes you? Here's a better question, can you get an AI happy ending? That was my next thing? You stole that from me, but that's okay. But no, I didn't know I don't get. But the thing is, I

don't I hate massages overall. But yeah, I know the haha happy ending. That's what Pete, that's the joke, right, but well yeah, yeah I made it right. You made the joke right. But I don't like regular massages. I don't like massages at all. So I feel like I want to get one of these because I want to see if it really can give me a better quality. But you've gone massages on cruises. I know you have. I have, but will unwillingly or they were free. Oh

fair enough, I've gotten free free massages. I don't right in here? Yeah yeah, same. You know we got credit. Oh what do you mean? I got on board credit? Fuck what I'm going to I get that Manny Petty right now? Yeah, I got a facial no jokes. Well so so yeah, so what do you you? You really wouldn't let an ai uh no work you No. I would feel like it was a thing from Adams family. You know, the hand that just walks around. They say, don't knock it till you try it. I don't know

anyway they're giving they are, they are out there. How about this? Let me ask you a question. Hold on what if the what if the husband of the conjoined twins wants a massage? Does the left handed Brittany have to give a massage or does he get a one hand massage. He's gonna have to because the other girls is gonna be like, take a walk, but you can't. Here it is robotic messuse uses AI to tailor massage to users preferences. This is amazing and the users needs

tailor massage. By the way, my favorite counchy tailor massage. Yeah, I'm look at this. This thing is working. Look at this working. This guy we're doing it. We're doing an audio podcast.

every day thing. Oh my god, I just knowed something. What's that? What if the conjoined twin gets pregnant, they both have to go through childbirth? Oh my god, you're right. Oh and what if what if the other one didn't want kids right or doesn't want to go through the pain of childbirth? Does she have to help breastfeed the kid? And I don't know if she's capable. I'm just saying if they were so many quests, I go back to that. I go back all day to the topic, so many questions.

Let me tell you about my home my home selling experience. First of all, I want to shout out one of our newest slices. Well not newest, because he's been he's been hooked since December. Maybe that is my real tour. What about real tour. He's a real toys he's up to speed on the Brooking Boys. He and his wife are big fans, really big fans. Yeah, his wife was a big Morning show fan, the big show off air show head fan, off air note Nope, the Elvis Terran

Morning Show big fan. My realtor was not. But they are both big slices. Now, good, well, thank you. I want to I want to shout out the man who got me a bunch more money from my house than what I was asking. Yes, I I already wrote him very nice reviews, but I'm going to shout him out. His name is Andrew Allen. All Right, Andrew. He looks like Anderson Cooper, although he you know, he also looks

like Andy Cohen. I think he prefers the Andy Cohen reference. Yeah, all right, he's He's very good at what he does. He's also he's also fun and personable, and I genuinely think he gives a shit about his client. It's nice, is why to meet you?

be any happier. However, because my wife was at work and I'm a lazy stay home I had to handle all of the home showings, meaning when people want to come see the house during the week, I either have to make so I had to make sure the house is clean. I had to get up, make the beds. But you got to do it all. I staged the house and did everything every day, like every day stage the house. And then the way it's all digitalized now is I get a text message saying there's a request

for Tuesday at ten thirty. All the appointments of fifteen minutes or a half hour, the realtor schedules them for their client. So I were like, okay, I have to be out of the house for a half hour. So this was in December January. So I get in my car and by the way, you could you could never be home while they showing the show because they'll ask your questions you don't want to have to answer. Plus they feel uncomfortable. You can't be in the house. So I get the dogs, I get in my car and

I sit at the end of the block. Now end of the block I lived on. I lived on a cul de sack and my house was two houses away from the cul to sack. So when I sit in the cul de sack, the house wasn't that far away. I could see everybody going in the house. And it's weird when you watch people go into your house. It's weird because you're not home. You're like, they're in your stuff. Now, look, I've shopped for homes. I've gone into other people's homes. You open the closets, what do you do have to

open them? Scary? Close them? You close, You close the closet. If you open the blinds, you lower the blinds, you turn the lights on, you turn the lights off. Nope, Nope, that's not the way people are these days. They are intrusive. Fox. The majority of people that went into my house were rude and obnoxious. I'm gonna give you some stories. Fifteen minutes or a half hour. You have an option. Don't make a fifteen minute appointment and stay an hour. People did.

They stand in the kitchen talking for forty five minutes, and I'm in my car freezing my ass off because I'm not going to run the engine for forty five minutes an hour. I'll run the engine for fifteen minutes, but then at like the half hour, markt like, my tank's gonna be empty. I had dogs in the car. This is fucking bullshit. Okay, So I had the people who one family. You and I were going to podcast. We were podcasting, and I said I had to be

done by three o'clock. I remember this day right, because I had a three thirty appointment. Yeah, they showed up at two forty. Now two of the dogs were in the podcast room with me. One of my dogs was in the window. They saw the dog in the w window. He barked at them in the window. Now, when you sell your home, there's those lock boxes outside on you, on you on your porch or whatever, in front of your house. Yeah, and the realtor can open them and

take the key front. Of course, of course the realtor saw the dog in the window, saw my car on the driveway, opened the door. Wow, while you and I were podcasting. I ran downstairs to like, what are you doing? My dog was outside. My dog ran outside because they didn't let they didn't think to block the door. That for the dog to run out with the dog they saw in the window. Miserable, don't show up forty minutes early or whatever? Fuck you? Okay, all right then I

had these people come. They spent fifteen minutes in my house. Fifteen minutes. That's it. Now, have you spent fifteen minutes? That means you're not really that interested in the house. Yeah, you just want to get back yard. You're like, yeah, let's get an idea of what a house this this much money costs. Like I don't like the bathrooms, I like the kitchen. It's not not for us. Fifteen minutes they were in the house. These motherfuckers opened up every

one of my closets and left them open. If your biggest concern in my house is my closets, fuck, you don't buy my house. Like, what are you doing? I I it's one one of my bedrooms has sliding doors in the closets, right, they slid both of them open. It would kill you to close them? What?

I don't anybody know where I live. I don't want to they fuck with your your two dollars equipment over there? No, fuck you, it's not four million dollars. It's decent anyway. The point is, who goes to someone's house to buy a house. They go through your medicine cabinet. You're buying a house because of the inside of my medicine cabinet. You're fucking weird. They took it by the They definitely took a picture in your chair with the microphone next

to it. Yeah, that's probably what they did. That's a great point. Somewhere there's a picture of someone else, someone other than Brody's sitting in his chair. I had one one family. They were scheduled for one o'clock. Okay, my last appointment a day was one o'clock, right, it was them. Yeah, they don't show up, so we're like, they must have canceled. They're not coming, So they didn't bother putting it in the computer that they canceled. So I go back at

my house at one forty. When I realized they're not coming, I'm sitting on the couch. I'm chilling. At two thirty, they show up. I go, excuse me, what are you doing? Oh, we're here for our appointment. Your appointment was an hour and a half ago. Yeah, no, we wanted to see the house. No, no you don't let him in. No, no, you don't show But an hour and a half late? Were they went the realtor?

and twenty. I'm in my car. Yeah, I see the guy go into my bathroom because the window faces were unparked. He sits down on the toilet. This guy took a shit in your toilet. He ran into my bathroom my private bathroom. So at this point, it's an hour and fifteen minutes. So I go to my door my house. I knock on the door. The reltor comes to the door. He says, gonna help you. You ran up to interrupted the showing. Yes, because they were there an hour and

fifteen minutes whatever, twenty minutes. Team in an appoyment. You have binoculars or a telescope? What doing scary? I'm two houses of way staring at my house. They're supposed to be gone after twenty minutes. So the realtor comes to the front doors, is can I help you? I said, yeah, I'm the homeowner. I would like to come into the house. It's it's five thirty and when I have dinner. You guys are here over an hour. He goes, oh, I'm

sorry that we were talking. I go, yeah, but you're talking in my kitchen, right, I said, Plus, the guy took a dump in my toilet. No he didn't. He sat down on my toilet for eight minutes and didn't take a dump. You were not supposed to go into people's bathrooms. And you know what, the sad Paul was scary. God's honest truth. This is not for the podcast. Okay, I hid every roll of toilet paper and every box of tissues in my house. He wiped his as on your towel. I don't know what I hid the towels.

There was nothing to wipe with. I don't mind if you pee, but I know what people do. There was no toilet. It was all hidden in the garage. Guy, I think I think you might have wiped it under your dog. Is it one of your dogs? Brown now dogs?

She's touching the leaves, she's feeling them, she's looking at it like every like, what are you doing? Wanted to because she wanted to become one with nature, bro one with nature. So I'm waiting to go in my house. She's she's hand jobbing my bushes, which you know hashtag ham drob my bushes. Feel My Bush. That's the name of this podcast. Yeah, feel my bush, Feel my Bush. Okay, wait, by the way, you're you're like visibly angry, all right, slices,

I gotta say something here. He's basically angry. Fucking this guy is fuming right now. You're working yourself up on this. You realize this. You worked you worked yourself up, you wrote this down, and now you're reliving it. And I can imagine how you were fuming on those days when this was these wor things were. Now, look, I'm trying to be nice because I want these people to buy my house. You see, you have to put up with assholes, So I give you another one. This guy shows up

with his reeltor with his clients. The realtor shows up with his clients. They're thirty five minutes late. Yeah. Now again, that means I had to leave at ten minutes before the appointment, so I'm out of the house, so I'm in my car for forty five minutes. They show up thirty five minutes late. As I'm walking back to the front of my house. So I see him, like, excuse me, Can I help you now? At this point I already called Andrew. My realtor said, Andrew, these people are not here.

Can I go back in the house. He will give them five more minutes. I go, okay. At the thirty five minute mark, I'm like, fuck it. They're late. They're not coming. So I said, Andrew, they didn't call you. They didn't didn't into the into the computer, they didn't do anything. No. So when I go up to the front door, I said, can I help you? Yeah, we're here for our appointment. What time was your appointment? One o'clock? I said, you know it's one thirty five, right, Yeah,

you were running little late. I called Andrew. I let him know, really, because I just got off the phone. Andrew, you didn't call him? He goes, oh, I guess I must have called it different. Was called a different reeltor. Yeah. I said, well, I can't show you the house. He goes, well, it came all the way from Brooklyn. I go, well, then, why didn't you tell me you were running late? Oh? Did you let did you let him in the house?

I let them in because they were from Brooklyn. Okay, I said, Oh, I'm gonna say from brook from Brooklyn, this namesake of this podcast. You know, the b of course, you know now the weirdest couple. I got one more couple. Ask me a question, scary again. Did you ever think that that because your house is for sale trying to unload it, that you you should maybe be able to put up a little bit with people's short coming and their and their lateness and their stupidity. Take it a

little bit more like a sponge. You know, good things are gonna happen. You are, but things can't picture perfect. Every time I showed my house over sixty times by the time we were done, right about sixty two appointments, Roughly, we got an offer on the first day. Like I could have called it quits, but I put up with it. And every day I would complain to Andrew and God bless him again. Andrew Allen, my realtor. I would complain to him. He's like, save it for the podcast, David,

save it for the podcast. And I'm like, I'm gonna save it for the podcast, Andrew, but I'm going Okay, He's like, only a couple more days, give it a

couple more days. I know you're going through this. One couple goes into the house with their realtor, and I see the realtors downstairs with the wife, right because I see them in the window in the kitchen and through the dining room window, the living room window, and I see the husband is going in every bedroom and taking pictures of every corner, every light fixture, every piece of furniture. That's how some people shop, though. They have to know

what they're buying. Fuming my house. Okay, that's totally fine. I got no problem with that. He's not taking He's not like the guy that took the ship in your toilet. No, but why do you have a problem with that? They need to know what they're buying. So, you know, maybe he's got to have never seen anyone take pictures of every wall. There was no cracks. It wasn't like he was taking pictures of cracks. He's like, I want to have this crack looked at. Well, he wants to remember

every room and he opened every closet. Maybe he's got short term memory, so maybe he wants to remind himself of what that All four walls are gray. Okay, so what is a conspiracy against you, Brody? Is that what he's documenting? Your house? By the way, and in thirty days you knew that that wasn't going to be your house anymore. There was still The point is he was looking at my things. My things photograph he's face for, he's photographic my computer desk that has like bobble heads

on it. I'd like I left a couple of bottle heads because I so you have to take everything out. I took all the pictures off the walls. I I, you know, what, are you just weird? What do you think he did with I don't know these pictures. I don't know. Plus I didn't want anyone to like know it was by my house. I felt weird, like like, oh, it was in Brodie's house. I took up Goroop's bedroom. It was just weird. Also, the last thing I'll tell you, you know, I sleep late, So I told Andrew don't

make any appointments to me before eleven am. He's like, all right, no problem, eleven am will be your first appointment. I'm sleeping, okay, I'm sleeping in my underwear. That's it. And just wear my underwear because again, my wife's at work. I'm right in sure. So it's it's ten twenty five. I gotta get up, get dressed. I got an eleven fifteen appointment, so I got plenty of time to get up and get out. Ten thirty I hear the front

door open. I'm in my underwear, so I throw on pants like there's a fire, and I and the dogs are all in the rooms. I throw a T shirt on. I said, can I help you? Yeah, I'm here for my appointment. What time's your appointment? Eleven fifteen? It's ten thirty.

You fuck. So, I will tell you that. Andrews said, most of what I complained about is common, but that no one should show up forty five minutes early. Of course. Yeah, if I was late, I get it all. Yes, yes, yes, but you got You're dealing with the public. You're trying to have a very very big piece of you know, yeah, piece of property. You're probably the biggest ask that you own. Right it was yeah everyone right. So but you sold your house, congratulations? Yes, I sold my house thanks to Andrew.

And I'm telling you I would have killed myself with someone else it wasn't for him. But man, oh man, interfacing with these people, uh, you know, listen, you gotta have a little bit of I don't even know what it is, just patience, humility, I don't know what you want to call it, but just plan, plan for the worst.

And you know under they say in the world of sales, under promise and over deliver, right, But in this case, expect the least of people and then you won't be so I expect you the least as in the least you could do is not sit in my office chair. How would you feel if you came home and all your shit was moved? I'd be fucking angry. That isn't related to buying a house, but taking this in my podcast chair. But to buy a house, there's got to

be a reason behind taking pictures of every corner. Maybe he's trying to figure out where he would put his furniture. I don't know. I'm not trying to make excuses for these people. You had to sit in a chair to figure out where he put his furniture. How is that a thing? You need to cool down and have yourself a weekend? Bertie, You want me to cool down? Yeah, my dog won't even cool down. Dogs are barking as we speak. My dogs are always barking. Did they get

the dog get the brown stained off his fur? Oh? Stop? Andrew works for Compass Realties. Compass Compass shout out to Compass and Andrew. But that's it again. If I had any if I had a let's say I had like a guy like me as my realtor. Like if a hearty guy like, hey, I like you, you're from Brooklyn, he would have been like, get the fuck off my property, Like, my guy doesn't want to sell the house to you, asshole. Luck a guy who was like, I'm down, It'll be fine.

This is what's to be expected. If they like that, if they stay an hour and a half. They're probably gonna put a bit on the house. So he's able to calm me down, but scary in the moment. Dude, you know me, Oh, I know you, Oh, I know you. Then touching my cabinets, you gotta go. I gotta have myself. I lived in the living in Brooklyn. I have these problems. I have to have myself. A good Friday, Boys, Brooklyn Boys