#20: Brody's Epic UBER Rant and Oops She's Not Pregnant!

that guy's Scary Jones. Why not? Sometimes it's so we have a thing. I don't want you. I don't need to. First of all, you're not gonna humble me, so that's I'm not humble. But is it weird like if you're introduced when they say hey, this, hey so and so, this is so, this is Brody, Like, isn't it almost like somebody does the honors for you so you don't have to toot your own horn. It's like what I'm announced on stage if I'm a club, They're like, let's fine,

put up. If I'm going to introduce you, then if you're gonna introduce to me, I should introduce you. That's and that's scary. What's your name? Right? Do you know that? Yeah? No, I'm just kidding you. Scary Johnson did screw you? Yeah you did? Okay, So last week I won the social media game. We went out to a business dinner and many of you have already seen it but on my Instagram page at David underscore Brody and you see it

on Twitter as well. We were at dinner and they gave us place cards with our with our just our our radio names like so I didn't say David Brody, just said Brody, and it said, uh, scary. So uh. I noticed that because we were sitting next to each other, I saw Brody. I was to the left of Scary, so it said Brody and scary. So the way it should be. And I took the two cards and I put them together by a glass of whatever was on the table, and I said, look the place cards. Know

the deal. Its Brody and Scary. Very clever, right, And then then I had thoughts of maybe you know what I thought you're gonna be. I'm gonna take this, I'm gonna digitally superimpose it and switch them and but rather than copy you ten times harder today, Yeah, I'm not I'm not a fan. Actually earlier in the week. By the time you hear this podcast, um oh, because we're not okay, we should probably say to explain that today is Monday, December four, right, that's when we're recording this now.

We just recorded on December one on Friday. Yeah, so we're not going to release two episodes back to back, back to back. So plus if anything pops up in the next day, we might add to it. But Scary is out of town Wednesday, Thursday and Friday this week, so he's like, we gotta record Monday because Tuesday doesn't work for me to screw the people out of a podcast. We gotta do a podcast right and Tuesday, tomorrow, the fifth, I'm recording Walkers and Talkers getting ready for the big

Walking Dead Midsummer finale. This time is the season and so there's some things that are gonna be lacking in this podcast, but hopefully we'll bring anyway. So Scary on social media on the not only this, I I I got Scary with the Brodyan ski Rie on my personal Instagram account. What's Scary did above? And beyond f and me is he used the Elvis durand show account on Instagram on the same day we had Jake Miller in studio. So there's all Jake Miller videos and stuff. You're like, oh,

Jake Miller, Jake Miller, Jake Miller. And then there's the graphic for our show. This is on the Elvis Durranchio insta story on the story. By the time you hear this, it's gonna be gone. Show them what it is, okay, sell them what it is. Well, you know, I'm gonna take a screenshot of this, and you know I don't want to screenshot it. You should screenshot it, and on the screenshot anyway, hold on because to promote this, explain, to promote the podcast, we're take an instant story screenshot

and we say, hey, swipe up to listen. So on Monday December four, Elvis durrancho inst the story which is already erased by the time you're seeing this, hearing this or hearing this right or seeing this graphic saying the graphic, they're not gonna see it. The Brooklyn It says the Broolyn Boys podcast graphic, the orange logo, and then the link to our Instagram accounts, and Brodie's link to his name is eatsy weensy and underneath mark describe it underneath mine,

which is gigantic and and clickable. So Brodie's clickable link to his name, but it's over your face the same way mind is over mine, but mine is on top of yours and to the left of it and taking up like ten times. Not only that, on my phone for some reason, it's showing slightly different than your phone. Half of my screen name is off the screen. Well I didn't do that on purpose. Yeah, and it says wipe to listen, So um, I guess I'm zoomed in

a little bit. If you're seeing it, it says scary Jones and then well that's because you you need to do that. But I, I, actually, I totally how did you Saturday night at the holiday after the holiday Christmas, the holiday party, thet I didn't have to do anything, but I think I think it speaks for itself. What I what I what happened? So after the Elvistrand holiday party, which we had a great time, and uh, one of my rants is about where we went. We went to

a great bar. Doesn't matter. The name of the bar. Great bar in Manhattan, about a block from where the holiday party was, and we walk in. It's a long bar. It's like fifty ft long, huge bar, and that's the bar. Countertop is long. As we're walking by, they're like, let's go in the back, maybe there's some tables. So we walked by, and as we walk by, I hear like something like that in the crowd, Like I thought, I don't know, maybe I didn't hear it right whatever, And

then somebody says, there's no seats back here. Let's go back to the front. So, by the way, it's just Metallica lyrics anyway. So we walked back to the front of the bar, and as we're walking back, I hear I thought, it's always you supposed to do front to the bag. What front? What are we talking about? Back to the front is uh Metallica lyrics. Front to the back is when you're changing a diaper on a baby girl. That's right front to back. You go, uh, don't do

it back to the front. Yeah, I don't know. I don't have kids, but this is what people tell me. But continue, Okay, So as we're walking by again, I hear them. Somebody say my name. So I turned around and You're like, hey, you're You're David Brodie and I said, yeah, hey, Hi, nice to meet you. You know, hi, And we kept walking, but I waved to him, I said hello, and uh, I said, I told you that they were somebody noticed me. You're like, yeah, you get that a lot in these bars,

and they were like googling. They looked like they were google imaging everybody and trying to figure who. They didn't recognize. You didn't say anything. They didn't say hey, scary, nothing, you're you're the big on air talent. Idn't care, no, I know, but I did. I was very excited. I love that somebody recognize me. But they didn't recognize you felt these two dudes were What was the name of the place. It was called the Ginger Man. Okay, I

didn't want to give the name of the boss. See, okay, remember last episode when I said, if it's not important to you, remember it's right whispered and I said, where's Nate. You're like, he's right there. You don't take the fucking hint. I deliberately said it's not important what the name of the bar is because I'm gonna bash the bartender in a minute, and I didn't want to bash the bar. Why don't you ever take the hint. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. It's beeped out. I didn't say it,

did did? No? I didn't say it. Who are you looking at? What we need? What's going on over there? Bertie's pointing to people outside the glass. Yeah, I want to bring you. I want to bring Bethany, one of the co hosts of our morning shot. This is the Brooklyn Boys episode twenty. Oh is this isn't The Queen's Queens. No, that's that's Elvis's podcast. So I'm gonna tell you what I said, and then you tell me what you think

Scary said. Is a follow up? All right? Based on what you heard us talking about on the last episode, episode nineteen. You commented on a specific part of the podcast at the holiday part. Yes, so I said to Scary, telling him a story about how somebody recognized me at the bar we went to after the Elvistra and holiday party. Okay, and I said, at the bar we went to, it's not really important. I want to mention the name of the bar, but this is what happened, right, So then

what do you think he did? He wait, okay, so you said you said, it doesn't matter what the name of the bar is. Remember episode nineteen, right, he said he pushed you to name the bar. He named the bar because you were there as well, of course, but you did not necessary. But remember I didn't want to. It was important to me not to mention it. But it was important to him. Yeah, it was important to him to mention the bar, even though it was important to me not to. But if it's not important to Scary,

then it's not important to Scary. I didn't know he was going to go off on the bartender. Really, yes, you did, because we had a problem with the bartender. I now remember this. But but no, but the point of the original story. But I would have said the name of the are I said, but you not having a bit important to you? What's not important to him? So he had to say the name of the bar

because he doesn't take your feelings as important. It's correct, right, But I thought the only reason why he was leaving the name of the bar out was because the two guys, the two dudes who recognized him but not me. Yeah, and I thought maybe I was doing you a service because if they're listening to the podcast, they're like, oh my god, that was us, that was us at that bar. Okay, So if we didn't mention the name of the bar, you don't think those two guys would know that they

saw me Saturday night anyway, But they did. They did the Google look up, like, oh my god, is that David Brown? And they walked out. As we walked by them, they said it's David Brodie. And I walked by him again because we couldn't find a table, and they're like, that's definitely David Brodie. Nice turned around and go, hello, I'm David Brodie. Yeah, I said, hi, how are you? Guys? You might know me from such projects as the Elvis Train Morning Show, in the Broken Boys podcast, and so

nobody recognized scary. But I don't care about that. I was not but hurt. I don't really care about that. I'm all right it. Believe me. By the way, there's a lot of people in the in the in the world right now who say believe me, and usually it's right when they're lying. Hold on, I have the Bethany. We get to be finally used the Bethany jing oh oh,

put on some headphones. Bethany. Okay, so, I don't know if you're I don't know if you're ready, though, she may not be ready for this might okay, So one of our listeners says Queen of the improv. One of our listeners said they would love if Bethany would come on our podcast because we use profanity sometimes. They would like Bethany to curse to to to to get to have a curse every week. Just come on the show and uh and and and curse. Yeah, I can do that.

And so I said, great, I'll make a jingle and and she'll come in and every once in a while she'll come in and we will get a Bethany curse when she comes in. So hit the we get to do the feature we got. I'm so excited. Ready, Yeah, okay, here we go. May acid rain fall upon on your fields. May a black cat perpetually cross your lover's path. May you only wake up on the worst of Sundays and made the best of your today's be the best of your tomorrow's. Okay, that was that was That was not

the kind of curse I was looking for them. You're looking for I was looking for an expletive. But we didn't really tell her what we wanted. We just said, have a curse, ready, I know, and she took it literally, like a curse, like she's cursing. Either either way would be literally you put a spell on us, though I don't want that kind of curse. Well that's what we got, Okay, I got cuss, Bethany's cuss of the week. We need to retool that jingle. No, I think I think that's

what Bethany wants to do. If that's the curse, Is that your curse of the week? Okay, let no, let me try it again now that I know what you're looking for? Thinner? Was that a curse? Stephen King movie? Probably your book First Dinner? I was looking on a guy in the answer or something like that, broting that backfired on us. No, that's that's actually the kind of course I expected from Bethany. I expected just a one word curse, but like thinner, but not really thinner like skin.

What word were you looking for? Just like an expletive? Like what? I don't know. That's your curse, not mine. It was my curse. I did my curse. You apparently want to have your own curse, so it's your I think. If you want profanity, you and I provide plenty of that. That was great. Listen to Bethany on The Office Trade Morning Show and an Acquired Taste podcast. Yeah, but now I feel dissatisfied with how this went because I feel like I'm fine with it. I was misinterpreting the type

of curse we were going to get from. I expected more. I have newt you know, like a pox on your family, Like those are the ones I have to look up in my book at home, but that book is only awake on the soulstice. I have to like play in these ahead of time. You guys didn't let you go. You didn't give me enough of a warning. And if you had given me a warning, I would have been able to look up my curses the ones that than that.

I was just expecting you to just go fuck. If you could find the curse of the guy who can't keep his mouth shut and put it on scary, then be great. All right, All right, Well that was good. I liked it. I liked it. I feel like you're mad at me. You give me a little What are the podcasts? Has someone coming and deliver like a curse. Give me a double double toil in trouble next week or something we'll have bubbling sounds cold during effects kind of thing. I'm okay with that. Make a day. I

will come next week. I'll do await the listeners wanted to hear Bethany curse. That's what she's doing. Thank you. It was awesome. Thanks jingles singers. All right now, ms day, I will do it better. Okay. Also, can I just say I know what the word means, but noma stay is what people say when they're leaving. It should not have the word stay in it. I'm gonna go right now. Thank you very much, Thank you, Bethany Watson, everybody, thank you.

She's threw me for a curve. I love her. She's always thinking, she's she's just you just combined two expressions. She's thinking smarter than I have to stop you. You throw someone for a loop, right, She's threw me for a loop, right, because I was expecting something like or she threw you a curve, but she didn't throw you for a curve. She tore me for a loop, right, but not for a curve. Right? You throw me a curve? He threw you a curve when you're expecting the fastball

for he threw you for a loop. By the way, I can't look at you and keep a straight face. Prose. You've got glitter on your cheeks. Yeah, I know this has been a everyone in the room you know what it is. It's this tinsel and garland stuff all over the studio. We have elve shoes. Yeah, this glitter elve shoes, and this is someone's art project gone wrong. It's glitter all over them, glitter on cards. Nate's cheek was glittering earlier.

I feel like we're all at strip clubs. Look at you, Look at me a look at me, Look at me doing there? It's a pink one too. Okay, So we're talking about the bar. The bar. Okay, I'm gonna go back and I'm going to edit out the name of the bar so you could properly go off on the bartender. Although I don't think you should. I think that's right. Listen, I yelled a few Pelican pools last week, so exactly, so,

so should I leave it? I'm gonna leave. Okay. So we get to the bar and Scary whips out the credit card and he's like I'm buying the first round, which was very nice because that's how he rolls. Had his lovely female companion with him. It's a girlfriend, girlfriend, very attractive, Robin love her and a couple about five or six other people that were at the party that need a lit a little more time out. And so we went to this bar and you said, Brodie, what

do you happen? And I noticed they had like thirty forty handles of of draft beer and different things. And I saw one handle and said something cider. I don't know, I like cider. Um dick inside a hut tick insider, I know, yeah, anyway, so I wanted like a woodpecker, So I'm gonna apple cider. So you ordered for me, and you said to bartender one, because there were two female bartenders, You said the bartender one, hey, my friend, he would like a cider. What do you got And

she said dry cider or ginger cider? Right right right? So I said what do you mean by dry cider? Right? I didn't understand that meant she said the ginger is good? So I said, oh, uh, can I can I try that? Liket? So she fills up a pint and leaves it on the counter and I'm like, all right, well, I'm okay ginger cider. Now not keep in mind I already had

given her an example. I said, you know, do you have like like apple cider, like woodpecker he wants and right, that's apples, right, and she said dry or ginger, those are all we have. I mean, she didn't acknowledge she didn't apple apple. That's right. She's pushing the two. So she felt that ginger was better, and that's what she gave us. It was awful. For me, it was awful. I hate ginger ale and so this was like ginger ale e cider. It's like somebody pour and then you

tasted it, which I was uh impressed by. You didn't seem to mind my my drinking glass, right, and I was like, you're like, you don't have the cooties. So I said, we'll see if they'll take it back and give me something else, because it's terrible. I can't drink this. You're like, nah, someone else will drink it. And guess what somebody did. You were like, hey, brodnt like this. So one of our other co workers had it so great. So then bartender two comes over and she says, what

else are you're having? Because she was totaling up right, So you're like, well, my friend really wanted a apple cider or like a woodchuck cider, but he had the gingers. He hated it. There's all you want to get an apple cider. We got that, so she wasn't got an apple cider. It was great. So how does bartender one not know that they have an apple cider? Or ask do they have an apple cider? And she only pushed it too, she know dry and ginger, right, So okay,

fuck you bartender one. I understand it's not Budweiser. If that's your your your realm of expertise, but she was not clear about the drinks that she had on hand. And why if you don't have if you're not sure about the drinks you have on tap, then you maybe you should go back to bartender. Okay, you're not you're not the bar back, you're not the waitress, you're not the hostess, you're the bartender. Job one job no your ciders, or asked the other bartender you have another sider? We

have a third sider? We have not are you telling me that in all the hours and days and months and whatever she's been working there, nobody's ordered an apple cider. Well, no, I think what it was was the first the second bartender said that the the apple cider was was the was the dry cider because it's a cider, but it was dry? No? Was that not the we have We also have an apple cider. Do you know what the

problem was? If you noticed when she got the the ginger beer the ginger cider, she went over to one of the taps right behind her that said cider on it. But when bartender two went to get me cider, she walked all the way down the other end to like the fifty ft bar and pulled the other taps. So I bet bartender one didn't want to walk down to the other end. Figured, I'll just take whatever she offers me. If she gives me two choices, I'll pick one of

them and she won't have to walk. But bartender two walked already to the other end. Because they probably don't have every beer at every tap on both sides. Probably not so lazy ass who didn't want to walk all the way that that's my theory. Yeah, well, um, I had a fun, fun time despite that episode, and then you know, you got your sider at the end of the day and somebody else got to drink your free drink. Oh well, speaking of bartenders, at the Elvista and Holiday party,

we had a great time. It was awesome time. But I went to the bartender and I ordered something I don't normally drink. You know that, we've talked about that. But I'm like, you know what, it's a holiday party, it's open bar. Everyone's everybody's like, hey, Brody gets something. So Josh Coach, the boy Josh from our show, We went over to the bartender and he said, what do

you want? So I'm like, you know what, I haven't had a drink in a bar in a while, but I'm gonna order something that I like into a bar walks into a bar, I like kalua, right. So I'm like, well, what can I have with a calue? And I said, you know what, let me get a white Russian. There you go. You know, Russians are in the news lately, so I'm like, let me get a white Russian. I wouldn't be the first. So the bartender looks and he goes. He has that look on his face like who you know? Why.

I know why because it's not a popular drink at the moment, and technically a white Russian is made with milk, not with kalua. It's clue and milk and vodka. So he didn't know how to make it. So he had that look and I went, it's calue and milk and vodka. I don't you any combination. I don't care how much he's like, no, no, I got this. No, it's good. I got it. And they went to the other barto and he was like white, like he didn't know. So I stumped him. He stumped the stumped on a white Russian.

That's bartending one on one, I would have thought. And then then coaster boy Josh was like, oh yeah, then he orders a gimblet and the gimblet that he knew exactly how to make one. No, he was like a little thrown for a second. Then then he was like he had a thing for a second and then he banged it out. These guys are professional. No, I know,

they're like mixology. I understand that, but like Josh wanted to like deliberally order something like they're not a they're not a flip the cap off the beer and give it to you. They were like bartenders that went to school and studied. These the bartenders at the holiday party, We're not we don't have apple cider. I'm not walking to into the not like the people of the second. That girl was hard because she was hot, and she was hot. Both of them were very attractive, very attractive bartender.

I would rather have an ugly bartender who says, yeah, I've got apple cider, thanks Mike, right, Mike, Yeah, Mike is in Mike's iced tea as as in fat. Mike would like an anchor tattoo on his neck. You know, he's like, yeah, I got your I got whatever you need. I got it because he knows what he's got. She didn't know it, didn't care. I didn't want to walk next the next time. And uh, speaking of the Christmas party, so I holiday party. The holiday officially on the invitation

and says holiday party. Does say holiday party. But I called a Christmas party. Well that's because you would say again, I'm only thinking for yourself anyway, for you Jewish, go ahead. So I did wear this jacket which got a lot of accolades, got a lot of you did it again? What did I do you had to. You had to out out dress everybody. I didn't know it was a jacket that I bought you had I figured it's been

sitting in my closet for six months. Hadn't had the goal to wear it because it was bright red, And I'm like, when am I ever going to wear this jacket? I got it on clearance six months ago, and I said, huh, I think I'm gonna wear it at the holiday party because it's okay, Christmas themed sort of holiday. Green and red are amongst songs love Christmas. So absolutely so I wore this red jacket and got a lot of response. And your girlfriend met you where you poked your car

in Manhattan. Yeah, and she had a beautiful red dress on his wall and you didn't plan that. But that's not where I'm going with By the way, I will blew see here's a difference. You can wear that jacket again and you can wear whatever. I can never wear this jacket again because I already wanted one too many. It was a nice jacket, you gotta admit. Oh, if I was working in the mall, sure with the Santa Clause guy, that's awesome. Yeah. Anyway, it was a nice jacket.

It stood out. Oh that it did. Well, that's the reason why, Okay, when this is okay, when you when you crossed dirty seventh Street, cause stopped when they saw the jacket. It's like a red light. You're lucky balls around. Well, this is why I never wear loud clothing or clothing that might stand out, because it's memorable. No, it's memorable. If you were a memorable piece of memorable accessory. It could be anything. You're pretty much you're pretty much marked.

Like if I wore these outlandish sneakers. I mean, actually sneakers are acceptable to wear over and over again. It so let's keep it with the jacket, the shirt, the pants. You wear a jacket, now, that's that that sticks out, like that one you wore with the eight ball on the back that people are always gonna know, always going to know that Oh scary war that to that event because I remember because it was memorable. As you said, so, it's really almost not worth it, you know, to buy

clothing that stands out. Be um, Well, you could wear it to another holiday party. It's what nobody from work is at. I could, but I was gonna wear it the jingle ball. This week you could people saw it. Thirty people saw it well, plus you had it on social media and social The thing nobody in the Jingle Bowl audience is gonna go, oh, look, Scary's wearing his red jacket. No, it's like, I'll tell you, I'll do this. Elvis almost did it. The thing with my My, My Brooklyn,

my black Brooklyn shirt. I bought this beautiful black Brooklyn shirt and it had lovely detail to it and the Brooklyn the letters Brooklyn were in Oh, I thought it was a Brooklyn shirt because it was sleeveless. No, it was a Brooklyn shirt. Like me, it said Brooklyn. Now, this was my favorite shirt of all time that that had Brooklyn on it. I wore of all the many shirts you have that's Brooklyn, a lot of that I know, but this one was nice because the lettering, the stitching

on it was it was nicely. I wore it to a photo shoot once and it became my black DJ card DJ card for several days. Is it off whiter beige? It's a brook right, So so that's been everywhere and I've had that image everywhere for the longest time. So now I feel I mean, I actually I retired it and and I'm like, I'll never wear this again because people are like, no, I don't think you have. I don't think I don't think I could wear it. I think you're fine. Bring it back out again. Yeah, I

think it's time you can bring it back. I'm gonna wear it to the show tomorrow, the radio show, and see if anybody calls me out on it. I mean it seriously. Is the one picture of me that's been everywhere for the past ten years, and it's been it's been well is that one? And is the white met shirt you have? You took a photo like with that one? Also that one too, but I remember it obviously, so yeah, I don't think it was gonna remember that picture. I

feel like I can't wear it again. It's been like, oh, Skier is wearing that old shirt. Well, you know the picture of me the of our logo, the Brooklyn Boys logo. Yeah, I wear that shirt, that white shirt with the blue and green stripes. Yeah, but it's inconspicuous. It's not right. I don't dress like you that you're dressing like bam, look at me by dressing. No, don't look at me. So usually when you're dressing. Bam, look at me. You're paying a lot more money for those types of clothings

and clothing accessories. So that means you know, it's stupid. You're paying so much money just to have, just to make a stake when we wear it once. When I when I buy a new blue plaid shirt, my wife says, I go anything the new shirts goes. Didn't already have that one? Just how many do you have? Right? So all right, I don't have that problem. I wear the same shirt three days in a row, You'll still think it's a different shirt. I will that must a different shirt.

He wouldn't won that, yest. I've never seen that shirt before that you're wearing shirt. Probably had it last year, did you really? I haven't gone shopping yet this year, So I think I have two new shirts? Do you do? But if there's a if there's yeah, the one with the Xcel sticker on it last week? Now described that shirt? Do you remember it? I think? I think it's like blue and black and white and just like that one he played, but it was bigger. The plant comes in

different sizes. When I see it's this small blue plant, but this is a gap shirt. I love it. It's beautiful. I like, thank you, we'll do me later. Mail talk that like, it's mail time, welcome, you've got mail, Okay, can I say something before you read the email? So last week episode nineteen, we did it the other studio.

I ran the board. Everything sounded fantastic, but there's a couple of buttons on the top of the board that we use that you have to tell it where to send the audio, and the buttons that tell the audio to go to the thing that we're recording the whole podcast, somebody un pushed them, so all the jingles and all the music didn't go to the recording. So Scary had to go back and manually add all the jingles back.

Here was a painstaking process. And by the way, you people on Twitter who called me out for being my fault, I said it was my fault. It was not. It was technically the fault of the guy who used the board before us, but anyway, I should have triple checked it. So my fault. So Scary in putting all the jingles back, he missed two of them. So if you heard nineteen and you're like, wait a minute, the Steak Dinner updates jingles missing and the sponsorship jingles missing right, we know

about it. We may go back and fix it. But in case you're like, yeah, you're like, what happened? You didn't tweet us, That's what happened. So now we're hearing this is it feeding? Is it running? In? OK? This is from Melissa Marston, David and funk Houser. What hey, Brooklyn boys. I don't want to either of your names first, because I love you both equally as a as a massive fan of Curb your enthusiasm. Can you imagine how thrilled I was to stumble upon this podcast? My day

was made. I must say scary as the Marty Funkhauser to Brodie's Larry David and I cannot get enough. I disagree with Bethany in that you cannot binge the show. As a runner, I listen to your podcast to entertain me on my long runs, and the time just flies better than music. I've noticed that my pace picks up when Brodie goes on a rant. They I find myself getting worked up as well. I guess I'm more brody than i'd like to admit as as am I accept I love I love vegetables and Brodie you make me

nervous with your non eating of veggies, okay scary. You never ceased to amaze me with your ability to seemingly never get insulted. Love your thoughts and input. I love everything you both do. Listen to the whole Elvis Rand Morning show after work so I don't miss anything. I have a very short commute. I also listened to the fifteen minute podcast Keep the Hours of Entertainment and Empowering Keep Empowering my runs. Oh that didn't sound good her runs. Yeah, anyway,

I appreciate it so much. And yes, I would pay ten cents to listen to yes podcast. That's from Melissa. We love Melissa. Thank you, Melissa, thank you so much. All right. By the way, she said she loves my rants. Yeah, when we came into the studio today, I said she, I don't have any unused jokes because we don't because we did the podcast Friday and today's Monday. I don't have any unused jokes, right, I said, Well, I got a couple of things I want to talk about. I

definitely have a couple of rants. And you said, we don't always have to have rants. We don't always have to have rants. But we just okay, direct your thoughts to add scary Jones. That's the thing. That's what we do. That's what we do. When people tweet me to go love your rants. Look this gotta it's gotta be it's gotta be one or two people listening to this podcast who go, I love the rants. I get it. I totally get it. But I loved you I love your rants.

I just I didn't. The pool Rant had this huge expectation because we delayed for three months. We talked about it. First of all, you told me I should have delayed three or four more episodes to keep the anticipation up. I'm glad. But if you look at the people that tweeted us, they all said the same thing. They loved it. They would they would be angry. They wouldn't. They were getting sweaty listening to it. I guess it's because it's

a product. Now. It's not about that. It's about the guy was bad mouthing me in the back of the store last last podcast, and I heard him doing and we call him. I would call him right now, I would. I don't know the guy's name, I don't know which manager it was called the store no, plus it was like two months ago at this point. Anyway, The thing is, if I don't have this podcast to rant, I will go crazy. Right, this is my outlet, So well, this

is your opportunity. No, no, I I have four rants this week to twos from I had a rough weekend. One of them is my wife's problem that I'm trying to help her with. All right, so I've got an uber rant. I've got a register tape rant which is a short and that's a short one. I had a problem with H and M and um and a big problem this weekend with ups so and I have a problem with you, David Brodie. Really want to go first? Why did you give me? Why don't you give me

a rant? And the problem with how you funked up this weekend? How I funked up this weekend? Oh yeah, and I really you made a major error. Oh, I have no idea what you're talking about. This is not like a radio bit like I don't wonder what he's saying. I have no clue. Well, I admit that I met a mistake. I even called you out on it in private,

and then you were like yeah about that. I probably shouldn't have done that and then I said podcast, which is code word for yeah, yeah, I remember you saying podcast. I remember what I did? All right, maybe because you were drunk on ginger cider that one sip um. All right, so uh uber a UPS. I'll save the H and M and the register take UPS because it's a time of season where everybody's getting gifts in the mail. I feel like I want to do Uber because I'm in

the middle of it right now. Let's go, let's let's do let's do UM, Let's do Uber, and now I'll do UPS next week. Yeah, only because ups UPS hasn't come to a conclusion yet, depends on whether or not they come to my house today. Let's talk about Uber. So my daughter, my my youngest one, uh, twelve years old, and she's got to go to gymnastics on Thursday last week, Thursday Friday. There was no one available to take her, and so she had to take Uber. We put her

in an Uber. So they tell the my wife's my wife's account and they it says, you know, approximately on Uber, it says it'll be thirty two dollars. Okay, fine, no problem. Put her in the car and the way to get to gymnastics is to drive a little bit, get on the New Jersey Turnpike and go north. Okay, New Jersey Turnpike, he said, major road, and it's uh, I want to say, like three exits to which has to go thirty dollars. The problem with a major road, well, I'll tell you

in a minute. So he gets on the turnpike, not north. He goes south. Now, the problem with a turnpike is the exits are what ten miles apart? Twelve miles apart, and you can't make a So he goes south. By mistake. My daughter is twelve with her I pod on or whatever phone. She doesn't know what's going on, show directions. So he gets off at the next exit, makes the big loop around you turn and gets back on the

turnpike south again. He goes south again, So he goes to the next exit, not the twelve miles before he gets another one. Keep in mind this is like we're getting there where it's like almost rush hour, so the traffic starting to build up. He gets to the second exit, he gets off, he does the loop around. I kid you not. He goes south again. What was uber rating? Well, we gave him a one I don't know what, but like usually when you get in you could see it just got like a four point too. I don't know,

I don't know. I have to ask my wife on the bubble. So he finally realizes as a mistake. He gets back on, He gets her there now she left. If if they had gone in the right direction, she would have gotten there a half hour early. She got there forty minutes late to a three hour gymnastics class. That's almost like the third sounds like the most horrible Uber ride ever. This is like seriously the trip from it. So they called my wife and they're like, hey, what's

going on your daughters fourty minutes later? Thing okay, because she wasn't there, She's like, why I put her in an ober and so she was. My wife was tracking her. She saw the whole thing happen. Right. So if you don't know how Uber works, you can see the GPS read out. You can see the trail of the car. You can see the car goes south through the loop, goes south through the loop, south through the loop. I mean the guy was almost in Philadelphia at this point.

So my wife goes through the app and says, uh so, yeah, so get this. The thirty dollar ride was that's where I thought you were gonna go. Because it's like, wait a second, Not only is are they making you lay right and in time, right right, they're doubling. It's double the price because they're they're traveling distance their own. This is still not the problem. So my wife emails them through the app and she says, hey, this is what happened,

driver south three times? So they right back first eight, right back. Well, sometimes there's traffic delays and that accounts for a longer ride. The price we give you up front is just an estimate. So then she writes them back because not what I'm complaining. She writes them back as my wife, and she's like, hey, read what I wrote your driver when south three times because we're gonna be forty minutes late. So then they're right back. Okay, we'll we'll we'll make the we'll make the drives. Uh

what now, what did I teach you? What did I teach my wife? You burn my steak and you bring me another steak at the right temperature forty minutes later, even as not even even as not even it doesn't matter. You gotta bring me free to right, my new book. My wife emails them back and says, I need to talk to you on the phone. This is not acceptable that I have to pay full price when you made my daughter forty minutes late and drove halfway into to Philadelphia.

So they wrote back, the case is closed. We've adjusted your your rate. No, no, and there's no phone number. So I tweet them. I tweet on social media to the customer service support. Did you tweet the Jersey Uber people? I tweeted, I tweeted, hold on, I tweeted the appropriate ones. Okay, the Uber support and Uber And remember what I told you that Hula Hands did to me? And I said, you know, if you run a social media account, know you run a social media account, know how to use it? Correct?

So Uber writes me back and says, send us a direct message with the your with your phone number and email address, and we'll get back to you. So guess what. The motherfucker's aren't following me, so I can't direct message. So I right back and I say, hey, follow me on Twitter. So I get right, bastard. So they send me a tweet back and they say, here's how you send us a direct message. Click this link. So it's

like Twitter slash uber support slash mentions direct message. So they think I don't know how to send a goddamn direct message to them, when they're the ones who don't know how to drive north. I'm a turnpike, so I right back, I know how to send a direct message. Follow me, follow me on Twitter, so light out. So they follow me, and I send them an explanation of

what opened. Right so so I so I they I give them, I give them my email address, and they say, there's no such ride in the daytime the day you said under your email address. By the way, this is already a thousand times better than the pool. Okay, So I say, that's because it's my wife who put my daughter in the car. Here's her email address. Right, here's my number, Jesus, we'll call it. We'll call you today. Great, here's my wife's email address. That's the account to look up.

When you find the ride on that date, please call me at two hours go by day. Right back, Oh, due to policy concerns, you're a third party. We can't communicate with a third party because it's not your email that was associated with the ride. All right, back, Listen that email addresses under my banner. I pay for that email address. I pay for the Uber. The credit card used is my credit card. It's all mine. And my

wife's email address has Brody in the title. That's me, and they were back, well, you already told us it's your wife's email address, so I wrote, you know why call me? A'm gonna shred your ass on social media, sir. That's our policy with Terribly Sorry. We're allowed to divulge conversations with third party. I said, third party. We share the email address, it's under my account. Call me. We can't call you, So, dude, you gotta be careful that they don't ban you from Uber. I can't. I please,

I take the Uber once a year fun them. I'll take lift for this aggravation. I don't need this kind of aggravation from Uber. Whooper has got enough problems on their hands. They don't need to worry about my problems. So what I'm gonna do is today I'm logging in under my wife's Twitter account, which she gave me the log in for, and I'm gonna I'm gonna tweet at them tell him to follow me, because I can't direct message unless they follow me, and then I wanna write

to them as my wife. I guess who's gonna answer the fucking phone when they call me? My name's Melissa, bitch. I got a deep voice. You've got a problem with Thats right? So fuck uber fixed the problem? Oh my god? South south south? How hard is it? This signs everywhere north is north south to south. You have a knap system on your damn phone. Use it. So thank you. I'm done. Now you're not. You're not getting the way easy. Okay, So what did I do? Because you should never ask

a woman? Oh shit? Oh no, no, no, oh my god. Yes, you can't tell that story. We were just we're just gonna be very vague about it. Okay. No, no, you you yelled at me at the holiday party. But it didn't happen at the holiday party. That's where I yelled it. It happened here in the well at the Thanksgiving food thing we had. It was we did we did that thing at the theater downstairs. It was a pot luck lunch, lug lunch. So so we have a guy, we have a guy who has like what four kids, five kids?

Four kids, four kids, and uh, he brought his he brought his wife. We used to work. It doesn't work here anymore. But he brought his wife to this pot luck thing and she's got like a little bump now to my recollection, he had a kid like a year ago. Yes, And we always used to joke with him like, oh, you have a kid, right, because he's got like three kids. So I said to him before I think he's got four four kids. So I said to him, did I did I miss something? What do you do? Yeah, he says,

it's directly to the guy's wife right now. She's by the way. I've learned that a lot of times, and I actually brody. It was you who taught several year you said, scary, right, I've had three kids, and you, I know, you're not really well versed in the pregnancy world and stuff like that with you know, women that have kids and all that. But you should never ever

ever ask a woman when she and I didn't. You could never be sure if if she's carrying the excess baby weight from after the baby, if she's just gained some weight. But but don't ever assume a woman is pregnant. And in my slight defense, his wife, who hadn't seen it in many years a couple of years. Didn't look pregnant, like she didn't put on a lot of baby weight. He looked like the perfect weight for someone who was

about four months pregnant. Right, And there was another woman at the party who actually was like six months pregnant, but you couldn't tell. I knew. I knew her, so I knew she was pregnant. Okay, but at this, at this part when you went over to her and no, I said to the guy and then said, did I miss something? When you do you do another one? Another one, another one? And he said to me, yeah, you know you know that, uh that we had one like a year ago. We're not having another one? And didn't He

didn't know, he said, he got snipped. He goes, I got snipped. Do you know what I having anymore? So I said, you're lucky. He didn't. He he didn't. He thought I was. He thought I was just joking in general, like you not like your wife has a baby bump. Right, No, I didn't. I didn't. I don't look at hard. I didn't look at horror and go ha ha ha. Right, So I I flet up, but he didn't catch my f up, Thank god, thank god, because he's a big d He's a big dude. Let this be a word

to the wise. Never ask a woman. But if I didn't ask and he she was, I would have felt like, you know, but he's it's a it's a bit. We've always joked with him. I think he can't have five kids. Five He may have five. The point was I thought this was number six, like I thought it was like another one, another one. This is just Christmas just so so yeah, so you you were like, oh, by the way, right when you saw Garrett's wife Alley at the Christmas part,

You're like, oh, that reminds me. And you did give me ship for men stop. Yeah, but you did. You screwed up. But that's okay. But he's in sales. I don't see him very often, so that's good. I have a bone to pick with you. I'm going to read a text message you said me, and let's see if our listeners know what I feel the same way I do. You know what it was. If you don't, I called you out on it too, so I said, um, I needed you to do something for the podcast. I said, oh,

you're gonna be are you putting the jingles? In the podcast tonight, and you wrote back, I'm currently at get this. I'm currently at a steak dinner with the Brooklyn boys. So I wrote back, how can that be? I'm home, and you wrote back, ha ha ha, and then posted a picture of you with all your Brooklyn friends. Because the Brooklyn Boys are more than just me and you. Yeah,

but you took your Brooklyn boys for a steak. Din By he's an original, he's yeah, and my buddy Jason and Anthony and we all went out for a steak. His name is Jason, and Anthony that's Alma and Anthony said buddy, okay, two of them, all right, So you went out with Jason, who I know, and Anthony I don't know. Sah oh yeah yah. So I know all these guys, all these guys, but they're not part of But you called them the Brooklyn boys. They are the Brooklyn Boys. We are the Brooklyn Boys. You said, Okay,

you didn't say my Brooklyn boys. You said steak dinner with the Brooklyn boys. That's our ship. So they can't be the Brooklyn boys. They can be your Brooklyn boys. A couple of Brooklyn boys, some Brooklyn boys, but they're not we're the Brooklyn Boys and they got a steak dinner. The fact that you took them for steak. Think of the irony and that that's what I'm saying, and that is pretty much pretty ironic. I didn't mean to rub it in your face. Yeah, that's what you did. I'm sorry.

You could have just said I'm out to dinner with some friends, or I'm out to dinner with my friends from Brooklyn and not tell me you haven't steak and not call them the Brooklyn Boys. You said currently at a steak dinner with the Brooklyn Boys. You could have just said I'm out, I'm not home. I could have said that, I could have said I screwed you did, all right? That's okay. Yeah, oh, don't you worry. Here's

what's gonna happen. Next time. You're gonna take me to a steak dinner and tweet them that you're out with the other Brooklyn boy. Okay, the Brooklyn Boys are out to dinner. Are enough? All right? By the way, we just got a text. I'm telling you, you can't make this stuff up. I don't know if you guys read these even after the show, but I enjoyed Brodie's Pool rant. But I don't have a Twitter to tell love your show.

We'll text them back and let them know they can email you next time at the Brooklyn Boys whatever gmail, but Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. Thank you area code six one. Oh. We should write that back. Yeah, I want to write them back right now, but I just heard that. Yeah, but by the way, I get a Twitter. Yeah, it's at the time of we're recording this.

And by the way, um, if you once again, we always say this, but we can't stress it enough because we still have not broken Apple iTunes top two hundred. Please leave us reviews, review our podcast, and please if you can share the link with your friends, if you could tweet it out. Here's the thing. Let people know that we have like a hundred and fifty reviews. Don't make us your big a secret, don't. We don't want to be a secret, right, Don't say I'm just gonna

keep this to myself. We have a hundred and fifties some odd really nice review and everyone has been so kind to us, and and some of them some of them are older, may not have a reference whatever. Anyway, Um, we have a lot of listeners were very fortunate. Good Oh bored. A little correction from We're on Google Play by the way too, Yes, I iTunes, google Play, I heart Radio, get us the radio, but definitely leave that Apple iTunes review. By the way, So some commercial I

think it was. I'm not gonna say what it was, but it was was for an app that I heard. That isn't this It was for some app commercial and they said available on iTunes, google Play and Android. Wait a second, isn't that one of the same. Yes, Google Play is the store on Android. So then redundant idiots, that's redundant. That's right. Um, he's so upset, by the way, Um, well, correction from last podcast, What did you say wrong? Remember when you were pointing the accusatory finger about me and

my brother named Stephen's sake. Stephen is a Jewish name, I said, Stephen is a Jewish, It's not an Italian name. Okay. Well, and by the way, one's a nationality, one's religion, right. Well, this from our friend Jody, the jew We love Jody. I just called her that Jewish Jody who works here. She said to me today she saw me in the hall. Yea scary she goes you tell Brodie that Stephen was a saint. Saint Stephen so all saints. An Italian no Catholic,

though I said Italian. I didn't say Stephen couldn't be a Catholic, but you you were, You were insinuating. No, I said, it's more of a Jewish name, because I'm Jewish, and I said that more of a Catholic. Italian said Italian. Italian is not Catholic. I know you'd like to believe that's anonymous. They are not. It's done the same. What

about Irish Catholic? Irish Catholic ones in nationality? And one is what I said was growing up in Brooklyn in the Italian neighborhood that you and I both grew up and you didn't know any Steven's that were that were they were all Jewish. They were all Jewish. But because I grew up with Mario and Guido Pauli and but Jewish, Jody made the point that there was a sat Stephen, and that's probably what my brother was named after because

I'm Catholic. Okay, but saints but okay. But my question was how did he end up with such a non attack. You have an Italian name, your real first name is Anthony. You can't also a saint. Yeah, but Anthony isn't a common Italian name. When you watch the Sopranos, Okay, little Stephen was on there, but he didn't play Stephen alright, Paulie Walnuts, Tony right, Bobby bac Law, those names big

pussy right married Marios and luigis Italian plumbers. The plumbers guys get that, but they're like, hey, Craizy, it was Stephen Steve even like look Stevie, like Steve. You never heard of Steve as an Italian Stefano, Stefano. I appreciate Jody the Jew chiming in, I love you, but right, but I would like totally Italian to call him. You could tell me Steven's an Italian name. That doesn't mean if you have an Italian family, this is a Stephen, it doesn't make it an Italian name. It's not a

traditional Italian name. Again, I want to we established, what's your mother's name, Roseanne, Roseanne, and your father Tony. That's Italian. If I went to an Italian restaurant like and and the and, the guy's name is Steven, Stevens Steven Steve's pizza. That's an Italian name, Pizza pizza, and that's more Italian, but it's Italian to me. Steve's Steve Pizza. Steve is like a dry cleaner. Steve's a deli st more like just like a generic name, Steve's Deli. I'd go to

Steve's Deli, steve sandwich shop, but like Steve's. Would you go to Steve's park Store? No? You wouldn't you go to Satreal's from Sopranos, right, the one that's fake, right exists. You go to sal Salamaria. You don't go to Steve Salamaria, so they don't get sal Manila right by the way, Steve. Okay, Steve is not Jewish though either though using all the Stevens, I said all the Stevens I know to be Jewish.

But the thing is by the same token when I think Delhi token, when I think Delhi, I think Murray. I think you know you would you go to right? Would you want to go to Irving? Would you would you go to call mines Coosha Delhi? Right? But Steve isn't as anymore Jewish as it is. I didn't say it was a Jewish name like a traditional standard grandpa name. But like I have an uncle. Everyone has an uncle Steve, cousin Steve, and it's like seven Steven's in my family.

They're all not pH I don't know about, but the stev st e v e n they're all in my family. The little plenty of Jewish Stevens. It doesn't make it a Jewish name. It means to me it's more common as a Jewish name, other Stevens that aren't Ewish. But again, Jewish is a religion. You can be a jew from Italy, happens, not as far as that's as far as the as far as the Italians in our neighborhood, the Saturday night

Feva neighborhood. Right, driving around in Monte Carlos, which is shirt on button and your wife beat a tea underneath your gold horn around your neck, right and the and the and the red horn, the red the horn hanging from your rear view mirror. Those guys cruising around looking for girls not named Steve most likely really, That's what I'm saying. Okay, all right now, I get it. It's a good name. And if your Italian your name is Stephen,

you're a good guy. You're okay. In my book, I'm just saying your family, you're like you're you're a Tony. Your father's a Tony. Your mother's Rose rose Mary. What's your grandfather's name. Yeah, what's your grandmother's name? Uh, Nan, it was Nancy, and Teresa's Tessy, Test Tessy. That's an Italian name. That's test. That's solid. My grandfather was Anthony on one side. My grandfather on the other side was Anthony, had no kidings. So I was gonna be Anthony no matter,

no matter what. Firstborn right, firstborn boy, boom, Anthony. Right. Now, your sister's name Jennifer. Right, you're gonna say that's not Italian. No, Well, if it's Jennifer, it's a time, no engine. You can drop the R. We don't say er when we say Jennifer, Jennifer. You don't say Jennifer. You do not. You say Jennifer convertibles. We can talk about the store, Jennifer, Jennifer. You say Jennifer. Alright, tweet us. Let me know if you think Stephen is

a classic Italian name. I think it is because your brother is Italian. He's your brother. Well, I guess a lot of Italian people with brothers and cousins name Stephen. Are gonna tweet. Let's name some famous Italian actors named Stephen. Uh, Stephen Baldwin, not Italian. Steven Scottish Steve, Steve McQueen, Steve, Steve Shirippa, Steve shr but from the soprano. I give you that one. There you go. I even mentioned him as a Bobby Black law he did. Yeah, Steve, but

shrip is his last name, so he's got a little bounce. Steve, Steve, Steve Steve. Iokie what I don't know what he is? Do we know it? I know he's I don't know if he's Italian, he's half Asian. I don't know Steve Steve. Oh we are. I worked with a kid who was who was half Asian and half half Italian. I think he was Japanese and Italian. No, he's Chinese and Italian. Chinese an Italian. He called himself, so there's no hate mail. He called himself Secheuan Pajan. He did. Yeah, that's what

he said. That's kind of funny. As long as he calls him himself that, that's fine. That's all right. Until next weekend, episode Never go on vacation a couple of weeks. Yeah, you have to do it. From Brooklyn Boys, Brolinda Boys, bro Brogland