#193: F U, I'm Dead

and one woman guest on her honeymoon. So we'll unveil that, and we have a new jingle. By the way, why would you why would you take your time at of your honeymoon to figure out the Fabrize lyrics and tweet? They love our podcast, they do they slice. Hey speaking ten millions strong and growing, ten millions strong and growing right now, Hey speaking of ten millions strong and growing. Yeah, scary.

And I noticed the trend that when school returned and people went back post pandemic to work come September, there has been a dip. You dip, we dip. You put your head up on your hip, right, So I'd like to believe it's not the quality and the content of our podcast. But people have returned to their lives and I'm sure they will catch up eventually. And the people

that are missing aren't hearing the message. Nobody what my messages, My messages to those of you that are hardcore, that are that are here right there still the very large percentage of people that listen religiously and multiple times. Now would be a good time to say, you know what, I'm not going to rest on my lower my laurels. The holiday season's coming up. Let's start spreading the word again. Start spreading the word the word. You just said the words.

Let's spread the word the word. Yeah, so the way you guys did a year ago and two years ago and you told everybody you knew, I'm sure you've made new friends post pandemic now. Or you have some relatives that you you've made amends with, right, maybe maybe your aunt who's like ninety years old and doesn't move a lot, maybe her home character and can just put us one just prompt in front of her. You know, she'll laugh, she'll laugh. She let's listen to like in a hundred

episodes in a row. It'll keep listening. I read in the New England Journal of Medicine that our podcast helps older people live longer. It was either that or Sacramento b which I think is uh not a real news source, you know, you know, like father, like son. My I was called called my mom and I was chewing on the phone. Which one is your mom, your father, yourself? Well? What was about the headline is like father, like son. Here is the story my mother. I called my mom

and I said, hey, what are you doing? And she's like, what are you chewing on? Because you know me, I eat on the phone, you know, I mean, just ask a seventy seven. Seventy seven will tell you what we did. We we chew into microphones all the time. So she was, what are you eating? I said, oh, I'm eating. I'm eating a plate of meatballs. I had left over meat balls Brodie, And she goes, you and your father with the damn meat balls. I said, what are you talking about?

Because daddy's eating meat balls too. So I'm like, So my father and I had the same we were in the same wavelength. We didn't have a conversation ahead of time, but we were both eating meatballs for dinner. Leftover meatballs. Great, we had a bonding moment over meatballs. And and and Brodie, I ask you, do you know what the holy grail the trifecta of meat balls are. Yeah, of course it's it's beef, pork and veal, is correct. Now, A lot

of people don't know that. A lot of people when they eat meat balls, they're just eating beef meatballs, or maybe beef and pork. But you need the beef, the pork and the veal together, which makes the best to meet the ball that you could ever imagine. Yeah, now do you know what? Um? Do you know what the the holy trinity of most soups? It's um. It's carrots celery and carrots celery. And there's another thing in there, Yes, there is shit. They call it myer plex, right, they

call it mirra. Yes, what is the third thing in the mirrorlexes where all the theaters like have carrots like carrots celery screaming at their phones. It's not califlower, No, no, no, it's cauliflower. Cauliflower would be a dog. It's not cauliflower either, cauliflowers. It's much more popular. What am I forgetting? You say? And I say, potatoes. Yes, potato is not part of the mirror poise. It's part of the mirror plaise. No, it's not. No, it's not. I will fight you on it.

It's something else. Is it? On onions? Mirror plaise? Onions? Yes, onions, onions, onions, celery, carrots. That's okay. You know what I'm thinking because when I was I used to work at Rolling Roaster, and sheep said, Bay Brooklyn. We made a mirror poise, but then we added we had carrots and potatoes in the same bag. That's what the potatoes. But it's onions, celery and carrots. Those three on the basis for an M I R E P O I X. That's right. And you know what that is, the basis for a lot of soup.

That's what I That's how I set it up. Stock it's it's it's actually used quite a bit and it comes together a lot of times comes together. Right now, Oh my god, I'm echoing like a bitch because of your goddamn equipment. Brody. You know what. I don't hear an echo. You don't hear an echo, but it's coming out of my mic into your headphones. Hello sounds that sounds dirty. Turned Brodie off for a second. Let me just I'm gonna rub him. Ye check check check check.

See it's gone. Brodie's mic is off. There's no echo. It sounds great. Brodie's mic is on. And here's the echo. I hear it. Yeah, of course not. You're not gonna so here an echo. Al Right, it sounds a little better anyway. Um. You know, Brodie, I went to a very Brooklyn funeral last week and I what they killed the person there live. It happened minutes before. Yeah, and they just threw him in. It sounds like a Brooklyn funeral. A buddy of mine, a dear buddy of mine, lost

his dad. And I'm sorry, you know, but there's there's a silver lining to this. Yeah, in the casket and the casket. Yeah. But so I went to the wake, paid my respects to his dad, and I walked into the funeral home. And you know how, a lot of times they'll and I don't know if it's if there's an Italian thing or a Northeast thing, if this Italian thing, A lot of times they make the dead body come

up through the field. No, they make they make a like road they take roses and they make it in the shape of a cross, or they take roses, they make it in the shape of like a real like a wreath, but but not really for Christmas. But it also said it's basically and they put the flowers on a huge stand. I'm talking. So they don't just send

vases of flowers, they said, they don't send bouquet's. They said, these huge arrangements that they have to put on these easels and they sit there and it's usually a heart or across made of red roses. All red roses make up a heart, right, or a cross of white roses. Okay, Brinie, I'm about to send you a picture here and wanna do this live on the podcast. I want I want your reaction before we describe what it is and if we have to pause. I didn't even send you anything. Oh,

I'm just anticipating. Sorry, dude, you're you're, you're you're literally going to plots. No, no, you are going no. No, hold on a second, David Brody, your mouth, your mouth. You know, the bodies hit the bodies hit the floor, your mouth's gonna drop um and zoom in because these aren't small. Well if they if they're not small. I wouldn't have to zoom in. No, no, but you have to zoom in to show these are like four or five ft tall arrangements. I guess it that was showing

the personality of the guy who passed away. Okay, hold on, I'm gonna give you one of them. Is it's not traditional, it's it's a it's a golf course with it with a picture of of a golf club on it. Hold on, let me look. Hold on, Oh come on now, hold on. Another one you got Those are roses. Another one is a cigar, literally a cigar of roses. Okay, two Before you say okay, before you say what this is, let me just answer your first question. Is this an Italian thing? Yes?

If you are not Italian, you're gonna say, oh my god, that's so Italian. And if you are Italian, you're gonna say, yeah, that's about right, unless you're an Italian that somehow when you came off the boat ended up in Nebraska and don't have the East Coast Italian vibe. Okay, the lesser of the two, I'm gonna I'm gonna stall with the top one. The first one you said, the obviously order. No, I'm gonna go in the order I think is less offensive.

That's interesting, interesting one. The first one is a cigar made of roses. Are these people that are gonna come after me? No? The cigar made of roses, And coming out of the cigar is smoke, and in the smoke it says dad, all right, I assume it's a big cigar. To the other picture, Nope, nope, this is the one I want to go to, don't you? Don't you? Then

there's a guess. It's a stick like a stand, right, and it's a five or six ft high hand with a ring of flowers around the ring finger right, So there's an additional ring of flowers that looks like a ring, and the hand is in the shape of a middle finger, giving a middle finger to everybody who showed up. It's a knuckle giving you the middle finger, as if you're looking at it. Yeah, like you're It's like you're looking at it. But the entire thing is made of roses, right,

So that makes it okay. Now you're saying yourself, Brodie, how could that have been the least offensive of the two? How could that have been the left shocking of the two? That seems pretty shocking. He's pretty dude. You second, you want everyone, hundreds of people walking into suit and ties to pay their respects just to the left of the casket and all and all you see, all you see is a middle finger saying pretty. I don't understand. That's

probably you should have been ending on middle finger. That's the big finish, right, you have comedic sensibilities. You got to end on the middle finger. Oh no, A So what the other picture you sent me? It's uh, oh boy, it's two different things. So the first one, I guess I can understand this. It's a it's a spray painting of the gentleman that's no longer with us. And it looks like it's a it's a kind of air brush you'd see on a T shirt with the carnival. It's

air brush, very nice. I'm assuming it looks just like him. And it's superimposed onto an American flag. That's fine, noting wrong with that. Then next to that, on a much bigger easel is a By the way, red flags are very popular right now. It's the red flag meme that's going around. But this is not what this is about.

It's a red flag which is marking the whole on a golf course on a beautiful day with clouds and trees and a giant putter which I have to say looks like a soup ladle and a ball, so it's like it's a scene from a golf course. Must have been an avid golfer. I have no problem with that.

He was now the last easel. Now again, everyone in America has a different opinion on what I'm gonna I'm gonna mention it is, but that's not like, that's not what I'm talking About'm not about the right to have one of these, whether you should have one of these. It's the fact that it's made of roses, and it's at a funeral exactly right. It may have been the

cause of death. I don't know, but it is a all I wanted to say, four ft high right, because on a stand and about five or six ft wide, a black and silver handgun made of roses, made of rose to the and it's to the right of the guy in the casket the dead right. Golf and guns, So you gotta fuck you knuckle middle finger on the left and you got a gun on the right. Now, is that fuck you? To death or is it film? Because that was his catchphrase, because he would always tell people,

you know, fuck you. So so where is this? If I'm looking at you know, like when you line emoji's up, you have to like figure out what the sentence means. Is this fuck you? I'm going golf. If you don't like it, I'll shoot you. Or is this fuck you? I have a gun and I'm a killer, like who played a lot of golf. I gotta I gotta bring back his memory. Here he was. He was a decorated Vietnam vet with purple hearts. He I know, I know, but it ruins the fun you want to talk about.

You want to talk about a character. And because I'm not saying is anything wrong with this? I think the middle finger is hilarious. It's just added to the golf thing. And then the gun made a rose in a cigar. It's a lot of visual when you look at the funeral home next to the cast. So the funeral director said to my buddy, I've seen a lot of things in my time. Here, he goes, but I've never seen anything like this. I gotta take some pictures, and my

friends like, go ahead, he goes. My father My father would have loved that. So that's let me say something. As a Brooklyn guy, I would have loved to have met this man. For ust of all, he's got a great sense of humor. Second of all, he's a he's a decorated soldier, he says, a marine. I'm sorry, soldier, decorated serviceman, a marine. So for that of itself, I'd like to meet him. But this is above and beyond. I'm dumbfounded. Have you ever seen anything like this in

your life? And here's the thing. The gun has a red ribbon on it. I don't know the significance. It's like, you know the Lexus commercials, we bought a Lexus, you put the big red ribbon. So he said, like, oh, I got a present from bant me the gun. I don't know. Here's a present for you. But it's not the kind of gun you'd have as a marine. It's the kind of gun you'd have as a guy on the shot gun. It's not a shotgun hand it looks

like a twenty two caliber pistol. Anyway, The fact that this roses and again in tradition, if you don't know a call for that, Yeah, Max's roses. Yeah. Um, I'd like to do a golf scene very good, you know, pottery very good. I'd like to do a cigar are oh sure, Dad was average okay, okay, And I'd like to do a middle finger and a gun. Hello hello, hello hello. Right, and and somebody spent time and precision on making this. Um yeah, but I guess listen, money takes.

Really it's really well done. They're well done too, They're not sloppy. And and again normally in that in those slots you would see on these easels, a giant heart made something a little more Christian across than the gun in the middle, white cross with roses and then the greenery around it. But instead you get a gun. And you know what I gotta say, this guy, uh, he lived his life and he must have been a fun guys.

And you know what they said, his family said, this is what he wanted, so he The shame of it is that he didn't get to go to his tuner and see this, like, you know, I would have been okay, like if they knew he was dying and he had like a week to live, if they made it and let him see it, because this is some quality workmanship, the shadowing on the knuckles, the ray on the ring finger, although not a pinky ring. So that's I'm less scared now. Um oh when he has oh, when he's got an

American flag in the casket, that's great. Okay, all right, well that was interesting podcast. Okay, so I don't want to keep this any well, we'll keep it for a little bit. Okay, So this segment, we're gonna unreveil the Fabreeze jingle. I do want to take this opportunity to thank the slices for something because, as you guys know, I do a Walkers and Talkers podcast where we talk about all of the many Walking Dead shows, walking Dead news.

You guys know, I've mentioned it before and I mentioned that we finally have a Walking Dead shirt for our podcast, which you can find on Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartail dot com. That's Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartail dot com. Thank you, sir. And I've mentioned it a couple of times on my other podcast, the Walking Dead podcast Walkers and Talkers, and we we had a bunch of people order the shirts. However, when I mentioned it on this podcast, we had three times as many orders for the shirt

from this podcast. So thank you slices who are crossover talent who go or fans of both, or maybe you just want to support me, in which case double thank you. In case you like, why is he promoting me walk in and Talkers podcast? Because I know you guys do the right thing and hooked me up. Thank you. Now we do have some special things. Keep your eyes on the merch store. Some things are coming soon, but not some thing new merch coming soon. Yeah, you know those

commercials this holiday season, we'll be saying that. Yeah, we'll be saying that. Oh, I'm so excited. Our boy Matt again, he's dude, he is, He's a genius. First of all, he heard the episode. We didn't even ask him, and he emails us, goes here, boys, here's some here's some roughs. What do you think? And I was like, oh, you know what, I like that. I would change that. I'd like that to change that scores like, I like that,

I would change the color on that. And the next day, boom, boom boom, it's all time like, oh my god, oh my god. This holiday season, get a loved one. You'll find out all right, you know what, um I made a purchase I'm very proud of myself. Not a Scamboni, but I did. I did everything by the book, and I ended up doing really well for myself. So I wanted to share there with everyone. I needed new plastic strong storage racks from my basement, okay, and I can

only fit in my basement four shelf high shelves. A lot of racks come five shelves, but I got the four shelf. And when you buy the four shelves, if you buy enough of them, what happens is you have extra legs and shelves to build another rack stand. Okay, it was a home improvement. That's well, I'm organizing the basement. Uh you know, getting making a little more space because I had an extra couch down here that I sold, and I have all that space now with a big

sectional couches no longer. So I bought the I was gonna buy three racks, but I bought two racks. I built them four and four, got them at home depot, and when I opened them, each shelf had a cracked shelf. Of the five four good one cracked like chunks of plastic out of them. They must have been dropped or banged and shipping whatever. Anyway, when you buy plastic shelving like this, inevitably most of them, there's a piece of paper inside that says stop, do not return to store.

If there are parts missing or anything is damaged, call us, email us right or go to our website and let us know and we will replace free of charge. Okay, okay. So I have the four and the four, and I have the two broken shelves that uh and and now when you get the shelves, you also get little caps for the top and little legs for the bottom. Well,

you can't buy them. So I just when I when I invoiced for the two broken shelves, I asked if I could please get an extra set of the caps and the legs, and they responded back, yes, and your two shelves are on the way. Great. So now the five and five is now four and four. I had two extra shelves right from that, right, and now I'm getting two shelves replaced to cracked ones that I put black tape over because they're black shelves. And now my

five and five will be four, four and four. So I've got three racks with a couple of cracks, and that's what they said, if their cracked, callus will send them new ones. So now the price of two, I've got three. So I'm very happy. I'm very excited. That's all. It's a minor little thing, but it's it's one of those where you know what, because the difference in price between the four shelf and the five shelve is nominal.

So if you buy a couple of fives and make them four's, you get extra legs and shelves, so you get an extra rack. Genius, Gus, I just dropped my mic hold on you are you are? You're ahead of your mind? Equipment is terribly I can hear like a banging sound. You're good, You're good? Are you excited for the for the New York City Wine and Food Festival we have coming up? And just you know, on the days, it reminds me of something. Do you remember, oh about

six seven years ago? You know, Scary always do that that really intensive diet where you don't eat anything bad and fried and very January. Every January first quarter, Scary goes into that mode where he loses forty pounds in thirty days or something like fat loss. Hit the jingle, hit the jingle, Now was scary. I could be helping people. You don't know that. Yes, okay, I could be helping people. Yes,

with my that's well, that's right. Right now I'm doing M sculpt neo, which is completely and again hit the other jingle again, you bitch, what are you talking about? Hit to the jing You just slipped it out of client in that scary What am I talking about? Now? You play dumb? That's the new angle. I don't know what you mean. I don't know. I'm just saying stop,

stop it, don't mention. Doorbell cameras just stopped. All I'm gonna say is no, no. I'm supposed to get results in the next couple of weeks, and I want to report. I'm going to report back to everybody. Okay. So I'm just telling you to show you all about six or seven years ago, in the middle, in the middle of the height of ski ees unbelievable cleans of of eating healthy, we went to an Italian restaurant called um Looks Docks in Staten Island. Our dear friend Kim Kim. The place

is no longer there, but they have. They had unbelievable Italian food and they had a fried giant meat ball that was stuffed with riccotta cheese. I think it was Chicken Parma Palooza, if I remember. That was the name of the event, and it was all things chicken parm And then there was this reverse chicken farm upside down chicken parm It was a chicken parm meat ball, and Scary sat there eating lettuce like nothing. I don't remember

the way. It was nothing. He didn't have any palm and he was just he was being a good kid, just going, Oh, imagine the greatest food, and you're like, you could have like your your food just everywhere, and I'm sitting on the end of the table away from everybody. Right. He had to get up and like walk away once or twice, but he did great. So when you ask me how I feel about Friday a month ago, I

would have told you I'm very excited. But I am doing very well on my on my newfound healthy eating kick, and I'm down a decent amount of weight. Oh, are we gonna see less of you on Friday night? Well, here's here's what I'll say to you. Do I do I want to mention how much I'll be down by Friday? Or should I just just wait until next time. I kind of want I think we should give the slices the preview here. Well, how about you tell me? Why

don't I'll tell you what? How about this? How about you see me Friday and then next week you have to guess how much you think I lost? Well, since when did we start this? Three weeks ago? Roughly three weeks ago. So we're gonna be about We're gonna be close to four weeks when I see you on Friday and a half. Yes, So what would your guest Are you going down to? Are you going to your old pants? Are you going to the back of the racks? I I never changed pants sizes. I just bought American Eagle

elastic pants. The stretch, the flexi flexi fleximnam they they stretched with me. You have the ones you have the pullarways. No, they don't have no no, no, no, no, no no pants. They have a little flex material in the in the waist. You don't see it, but they kind of like give a little bit, give a little bit. So, uh, I only So here's the thing. I lost a lot of weight in two thousand twelve. I remember that, right. We did weight watchers as a show I'm really proud of you,

I really am. This is great. And I kept it off probably for four or five years, and then slowly it was like, you know how the plateau is, right, I'm gonna make up numbers. Now you're at one. I'm out of one forty. You're at one forty right here at one forty three. You live in life. At one forty three, over eat some Chinese for your six. But you're like, then you get to one nine, You're like,

I'm still in the one fifty. Then you get you have a big meal, you go to a buffet, you're like one fifty one, but you're like a funk it. I'm only like a pounded to get back onto one. Get back over all of a sudden, you're comfortable in the one fifties. You're like, it's not even noticeable. So you're trying and say it crept up on you. And so now you So I gained back maybe of the way I had lost back in two twelve. Right, So my goal is to get back and maybe even better,

even better to pass. This journey is just begun. So when we see Friday and so still a work in progress, I would say to you um, let me see hold on, I am halfway to my two thousand twelve. Wait. Good for you, Brodie, Brodie, that's really impressive. You didn't share that like you love you, Rodrigo. Good no, no, you and Brodie we and and let me just tell the slices we did not speak about this. This is learning

about this live on this podcast right now. So I haven't gone to a a doctor of anything, but it's working for me. And I'm eating things I wouldn't normally eat, which I talked to you about it being salad and hummus and chicken breast. I woul playing chicken for you again. But I also i'm cheating a little bit like I made. You know what I did last night? I made myself a chicken turkey I'm sorry, a chicken sausage lasagna with

low fat cheeses and uh. And I had a third of what I would normally eat if I was like, oh it's good, I feel good about it. And I supplemented with some nectarines or whatever, clementines whatever. So um, okay, my phone, I'm excited, but I'm I'm not gonna eat like I would normally. My phone is listening to me as this is happening. You can't make this ship up. No, not a client, not a client. I got a text message from Eat Clean Bro, sir, up to your off

your next three orders. Swear to God, Brody the Texas here. I will fucking screenshot it. This can in. As we're talking about this, my phone is eavesdropping on us. Okay, because the Clean Bro they have delicious food, really do, and and it's very uh I'm gonna clean Bro. Well, it's not a lot of chemicals and and thick sauces, and it's good, but it's not low fat. It's not low calorie. And I made that mistake the first time they brought it up. But I'm like, oh man, eat

Clean Bro. They're like, yeah, it's healthy, which is it's healthier. So I kind of like piled up on it. And then I piled up on it. You know what I mean. It's very delicious, but it's healthier. And I'm not a doctor, so don't quote me on that. It's just you're not You are not a doctor. But I play one on TV and I stayed in holiday in Express Brodie. I can't believe is all these years I'm thinking that you're

the one responsible for America's diets. That's right. Good thing I'm not because we're an obese nation as a nation. Oh that could be our film obist nation. I feel like we can make a move you about this. Do you think, um gynecologists that are that that specialized in larger women are obest u n s not stuck? Let that sink in. We were gonna do the for Breeze jingle that you weren't supposed to hit. The we're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We don't. We were

just we're just moving along. We got time. We have time to do that, make plenty of time. I got something that's gonna take a little while, so I want to make sure we have time for that. We definitely do uh. The other thing I wanted to bring up though, as we we head into this is do you ever feel like you have like a sixth sense? Because I have a sixth sense when it comes to sitting at a table, you see dead people where people are no my sixth senses, I see people knocking knocking glasses over

with their hand gestures before it happens. This has happened now for a good two or three times to me, most recently with my girlfriend. Yeah, you telling me that you see people, probably Italian, you're an Italian wedding, talking wildly with their hands, and you have the sixth sense? Do you have, eesp You couldn't predict that they're flailing hands are going to knock over a glass on a table, And so I say, and I save it. I save it by graving the glass and I moved it to

the middle of the table. I do it so much, Brodie, so no one will ever know you are right. Okay, So my girlfriend I got into a fight about this because every time we go to braunch to go to dinner, she talks with her hands a lot, and she keeps her wine glass or whatever glass close to the edge of the table and she's always talking. So I always stop what she's doing. She's always talking. That's I take the glass and I moved it to the middle of

the table, away from her, and she goes. You would think I'm gonna what do you think I'm knocking over? You think I'm knocking it over. I'm not gonna knock it over. I'm like Robin, trust me, it's gonna. I could see it's gonna happen. But before I protected you from that happening. I prevented it because I brought the glass to the middle. Had I not, you would have knocked it over. So she's like bullshit. And we've had

this argument several times. Brodie, please your headphones. Oh my god, hello, hello, I'm coming back at me. Oh my god, it's terrible. We gotta get back for the mic further away. But I don't even know anyway. So so we were out Saturday night and we were at this restaurant restaurant, and we were hanging out together at it, and and she we were having wine, and there it was the wine glass. And then she was talking and she was going and her hands were moving and she had red wine, and

I saw it about to happen. But if remembering how we fought about it in the past and argued, I said, I'm not moving the glass this time. I'm just gonna I'm just gonna sit here because I just know and in my mind, I'm thinking, oh my god, please don't knock over the glass. Please don't knock over the glass. And we're talking and we're talking. Sure enough, she swipes accidentally at the glass. The glass falls on the floor, breaks, and and then the waiters come running over like what

the hell is going on over here? The wine glass breaks, all the wine goes all over the floor. She fucking knocked the glass on the floor, and I said, ah ha, see my brain told me to move the glass to the middle of the table to get away from your flowling arms into your hand gestures. But because of our previous conversation, I wasn't gonna do that this time. And look what happens. The glass breaks. Do you have a

sixth sense like this? No, it's called common sense. Well if you if you if listen, if if someone was sitting there with no arms and you you your sixth cents was they were gonna lean over and knock it over with their nose, I'd say, oh my god, what are the lottery numbers for tomorrow? But you predicted that at a wedding where everyone's cramped together or or you know, and and his glasses everywhere, that that arms flying around and got knock anna glass over. I mean, come on,

I just have this this. I went to a NASCAR event and before it started, I had a premonition that all the cars were gonna go around in a circle counterclockwise as drawn. Behold, one of them made a right turn. Unbelievable, but that's how you play the game. So in this case, no, that's how you play NASCAR. That's how that that's how it works. That's the contest. Everyone drives left. I had a feeling the Mets were not gonna win the world. Seriously,

it happened. These are these are not pres You're trying to compare this to that, and it's not working. If you want credit for saying for for predicting something that was bound to happen. At every wedding, at every table, people flail the arms. Of course they're gonna not get over. I saw a guy doing jumping Jack's on the edge of a building and he I knew he was gonna fall and unbelievable. Wow, I speak to the guy who fell. Did you see the guy who fell from six stories?

He tried to commit suicide, jumped off the ledge of a building in Jersey City and landed on the hood of a BMW. It broke his fall and he walked away. Well, he didn't walk away, I mean they had a caramut on stretcher. But he survived. I how bad, how how down and your look are you that you're trying to kill yourself and you can't even succeed at that. Well, I'd say that's, you know, probably not the first time

he's failed at something. But imagine that thank god he's gonna look back at this moment to be like, thank god that he's gonna try again. I mean, I feel bad for the guy, not that he failed. I feel bad for the guy that he wanted to do that. I feel bad. It's gotta be like, imagine he writes letters to his loved ones and he quits his job. He's like, go funk yourself. And then he goes home and he gives away all his valuables on the desk

and walks out right. He donates all his money, so he times everything perfectly, and he's like, by, by what shit, I'm still here now. He has no money for the medical bills, no coverage from his job because he quit. Like it's it's gonna steamroll guy like that in the bad shape. He probably want to take his own Wait a minute, but no, I'm happy he's alive, and I'm sure that I'm sure he's going to rethink it all and and come out of this thankful, thankful that because

life is precious. Yeah, I want to apologize. I got carried away there, Um, okay, it's it's it's not anything to joke about. The man is very unhappy and it's unfortunate for the car owner, unfortunate for the man that he that. But you know what, I'm hoping for his sake, he looks at this as an opportunity to turn his life around, and maybe he meets the right person in the hospital, a kind nurse or a doctor, someone that that befriends him, makes him feel better about him situations.

So let's let's hope for the best. Fan. But yeah, that was that was a crazy story. Oh listen, I want you to go into we want to talk event for Briefting in a second here, But I did want to give you guys an update. Thank you all for sending all the stories on the update of Barney the Bull, because I've mentioned it several times in the podcast. That was he got call saved and he's already hamburger again. No, no, no, pro he stopped that, sending him to a sanctuary where

he were forever. That's where it's sanctuary. The same where my first dog is the same farm. Dude. They say that he's going to be sp aired. He was supposed to be chopped up a little time spare ribbed roy. Don't do that. I need to believe that Barnie the Bull is being looked after until the end of his life. Spar m is usually parked. Don't tweet me. Yeah, he's gonna be looked after. Absolutely. You don't think that they took the thing to it anyway, but I appreciate the slices.

Set me the story they captured Barnie the Bill Finally Bill, I hope he's well, but I'm also preferred he was a medium rare. So I heard the cow jumped off a building and landed on a on a car. He jumped over the moon, Yes, and he ran away with the spoon and they still got him anyway. So let's get this out of the way. I want to give a special shout out. Hold on, let me pull up her her account. Um, we could talk to every I mean, I mean god, we could do a roll call shoutouts.

I'm looking at all the tweets I mentioned her. So I'm gonna mention I don't know if this is her new name of hers is the first person that came through with this. No sure would you listen to the coast for entertaining Alison Strasser? She writes or wrote, Brody, I'm behind on the podcast this week. I got married Friday and it's been a whirlwind weekend. I'm giving you that backstory, so you don't think I've been sitting here

googling for the last three days. L O L. I'm busy unpacking suitcases, listening to the podcast, and now I can't stop singing the Fabreeze commercial thanks to you. But I think I figured it out. Is it rehab Clean for Breeze? How am I supposed to wait until Thursday? The internet has no information? Alison the minute she landed from her honeymoon, listen to the podcast as she and she had to tweet us at that moment. Yep, and unfortunately Allison got it wrong. Yeah, what was it again?

Was her? She wrote, rehab Clean for Breeze. So let me play the real j Goldman. Hold on, hold on, hold on, I gotta turn on the old volume up on here, the old volume. You're lightly warn't clothing Okay, So let's let's let's sing rehab, rehab clean fa breeze and see if it sounds right right, It eliminates voters and it refreshes your lightly warn't clothing now that you said it could it could sound like it, but doesn't make any sense. What does it even mean when you

put those words together? Well you rehab clean like you, That is stretch. But I appreciate um, you know, her eagerness, her enthusiasm to come off her honeymoon for this. Um, you know, so many people did tweet us and get it right. I mean, I don't know if we even have the roll call of all the people that got it right, but so many of you tweeted us. We appreciate you, We see you out there. Um. Well, Jamie Hebner says she she's sure, but most people, you John,

Jamie Hepner got it, She got it. Um, I mean we can go on. Christopher Traverse, Christopher Traverse fabreeze jingle? Is is it? We happily for breeze? We happily for breeze? Not right? No? Not Christine my Orga got it right. Um, so did Eliza. She's better not be this. She got it right, though, Shinnigan. There's so many people here anyway. That's just Nelson Nelson Abrams, thank you so much for that. I see you Nelson Abrams, alright, and I see you.

You know Angel Hurst so scary. Be honest, before you read the tweets, did you have any clue what they were saying? No, no, no, no clue. Not not a clue. So should I play one more time? Playing more time, eliminate voters and refreshes you're late. We weren't clothing. I still think it says, uh, we have breeze fans. That's that's but the real lyrics average game er, Dad, I see you. You got it right to Yeah, that's shady jub so it's ready when I tell you're gonna go,

that's not what it says. Breathe happy for breeze. Okay, so here it is breathe happy for breeze. So the inflections all messed up. Here we go clothing quick try missed. It eliminates voters, it refreshes your lately weren't clothing breeze. First of all, it doesn't sound like that. Secondly, how could you take the word happy and chop it up that way and bring the inflection b happy. It's st right, you know what. But you can take a jingle like that and reward it right, Yes we can. The book

boscast We will be back. Hope you guys enjoyed that the jingle before the commercial, jingle before the commercial. We now have a new one in rotation. How if you think you know what the lyrics to that war, feel free to tweet scary this one is. Yeah, but this one is clear as day, clear as that's right. I made sure of it. I made sure of it. So all right, I want to tell you about the football game I went to where I sat behind the worst people.

So my daughter is a college cheerleader, my middle daughter, and so I drove up to the Boonies rural, rural, rural, rural, not far from the area I told you, had all the political flags on the houses, the size of the houses, and uh I sat at the game, had good seats, and I sat behind two guys, two guys, two guys. So before I tell you the two guys stories, I want to tell you about a girl who was up on the So we were on the on the bleachers,

and then behind the bleachers was like a walkway. And so after a touchdown, what does the kicker, do go, it's a field goal for the point extra the extra point? Oh my god? Wait after a touchdown? What you say after a touch were you the girl at the game after the touchdown? Yea? The kicker tries to kick a an extra point? Thank you? An extra point? Yes, yes, but like you just did a minute ago. Because the field goal is is three points, right, the girl yells out,

go get that field goal, kick that field goal. So that's when you're making a three point try. That's right, that's right. So the two common common mistake. Yes, I want to tell you the I would tell who the two guys where I sat behind at the football game. I sat, repeats himself, guy who was the guy on the left, and guy who knows everything but knows nothing?

Guy right? So the repeats himself, guy was. He's he's doing all that, he's he's giving you the play by play, right, So he's it looks like there looks like they're playing the high safety there. It's playing the high safety. That's what he's doing. He's playing the high safety. That's what

he's doing. Right. What does that mean? It just means that the safety is playing back further to allow for the underneath pass and it gives him a chance to to uh to roam around and it doesn't mean these are the details of football attention to right, cover two and man and zone. I don't want to get into that. He had to repeat himself over and over again. They're gonna run the ball here, They're they're definitely running it right right, and sin his friends going yeah, yeah, I

got he's oh yeah, yeah, he's running it. He's running it. Yep, he's running it. He ran it, Yep, he ran it. Play action pass right. So that's repeat guy. The other guy is guy who knows everything but knows nothing. Okay, this guy is is calling out all the coverages, all the plays and criticizing the coach. Coach does doing. The coach does nothing. This coach is terribles, coaches terrible sounds

like everybody that's sent around me at a giant game ever. Right, So he's criticizing the coach, right, but he's he's doing like he's like, oh, look they're gonna plat he comes to jet sweep, what are they doing? Oh? Come on, he started to pass. He couldn't pass him. That's a run play everything. And so then all every place like, oh, they're gonna blitz here. Look there blitz formation and it

wasn't blitz. There's communication in the secondary. Right and then and then so repeats himself, guys like, no, I don't think that's what it is. That's not what it is. I don't think it's what it is. Not what it is. Right, So the two of them are driving me crazy. So then every time, every time, um, every time a player gets injured. Uh, the guy who knows everything guy, he says, he's faking it on the other team. Right, this guy's trying out for an Academy award. He's not hurt, he's

not hurt. They carry the guy off, the first guy that he's limping, right, they go, he's faking it. Now, there's no reason to faking it. Was like it was the last thirty seconds, right, so there's no for me to go. Like, the bleachers are filled. So the guys the second guy gets injured, he's like, oh, come, he's faking it. He's faking it. Get out a faker. Didn't you bring it you? No? So the guy's yelling faker. Right. They brought the golf cart out to take the guy

off the field. Party goes, I guess he wasn't faking it. He goes. The guy goes, he's still probably faking it. He's still faking it. What is he thinking? They took him over the golf card. So then they're talking about the game. Now, these guys were fans of the other team, right, they were sitting on the wrong side. They should have been at the visitors side. So the guy goes, how about that game last week against blah blah blah. He goes, uh, he goes, oh, yeah, he said, Uh, I wasn't there.

I heard there was a big fight. And the guy goes, oh, huge way lee way. Yeah, that's some kind of gen Z jargon that we have. No, No, it's wrong for Melee is what it is? Oh like a made up word? No? Know it all? Guy who knows everything but knows nothing? Cold it away, lay, there's a huge How old these guys, I'm gonna say fifty All these are old men. I don't they were old? Here? I am thinking that these are like like like like teenagers are just out of college.

What have said? No, they were parents at the game. Okay, they're like brothers of the kids playing. All right, never mind, all right, so I have a whole different take on these guys. Now. Yeah, it was two guys that that were the sitting and they were making a drinking jokes the whole game, like references like oh man, I wish I had brought my Scotch, Oh man, I finished a flask.

On the right over This is Statler and Waldorf in the uppet balcony right right, it's oh yeah, yeah, he goes all flask, Yeah, flask, I should have brought my flask. Good thing with the flask. Yeah, Like, stop repeating yourself, you know I need to. And by the way, he didn't have like turetts or anything. He was just the kind of guy who wanted to say things to make

sure he got hurt. I need to believe that if you and I were sitting in a game, we would be doing something similar and we would be some part of someone else's story on their baby, but we'd be funnier. I just couldn't believe he's no, he's faking it. He's faking it. Barely touched him. And the guy's waving for the card, the guy like the medic, the team guy that like you know it comes over, he's like waving the car. He's like, oh, come on with the sound.

The sound, he said, come on with the cart, come on, come on with the car, Come on with the car. You're faking it. Come ont. I love it, I love it. But this is the These are the sights and the sounds of the game. Did they break out into it Let's go Brandon? Chance? No? What is that? Let's go Brandon? No? I don't know what that is? All right, don't worry about it. What is it? Don't tweet me. It's okay. It was It's just a chance that's going around. Let's

go Brandon. Let's let's go Brandon. You should start screaming at it at the games. I'm sure they look at you funny. It's it's what all the kids are doing now, the kids wearing the easiest go you texter. This morning you everyone who tweeted and texted in about the Easies and who loved the jingle the song parody? Yeah, did you see that? That what we played that last week? Did you see the tweets going by on the morning show today? They're creeping their way into the big show.

Everything said, they were like the good going scary. I showed my Easies on camera yesterday during the fifteen minute morning show podcast You Dead, You Dead. I'm gonna stand by the fact that I bought them sheerly because of the most comfortable seat sneaker on the market and for no other reason, not for status. Right, Kanye has figured out the art of the comfortable sneaker somehow, Yeah, team yeah, yeah, right. Um so I need some, I need some. I'm gonna

need some real estate. Let me know what to happen. Well after the next commercial break, it's all you and that because I know you have a very long rant. This has been building since July. July. Okay, not a problem. I mean listen, I mean we're here. We're here to rant. We're here to We're here to We're here to rant. This this one, this one's a multiple pager. By the way, I can't believe I got Elvis to to go to

Chipotle today and yesterday and get the brisket. If you guys watch and again, speaking of football, that's where I was turned onto this last Sunday Chippole started running. Turned on by Brisket, not not a sponsor, by the way, and by the way, this could be Barney the Bull in the form of brisket. We don't know, but but Chippole has this commercials where they do these extra close ups, like super close ups on the slicing of fresh brisket, and they have it at Chipotle and I made me

immediately salivated want to go to Chipotle. I talked about it on the Morning show. It caused Elvis to go to Chipotle and get the Chipotle the brick the brick brisket tacos. However, I need to believe that it is as good as the commercial people have told me that that went there and I and somebody I know who works there said, oh, believe me. We make the brisket fresh every morning, so they make brisket in there. I want to know from those slices, if you tried it,

what do you think about it. I have not been there yet, but man, since last Sunday, I've been craving it. I've been wanting to stop. I wonder how good this fucking brisket is. How good is it? Just just sorting that out there? Is there something that you want, like a review from from some of the slices on something that you didn't get to try yet, Like, I mean, we know the brisket. Actually, the minute my wife saw the commercial, she texted me and said, Chipotle has got brisket, right,

she knows. I'm a brisket guy. I gotta like brisket now. I like I like other meats more, but brisket is like, Oh that's nice. I'll have to try that. That's I have. That's it. I have to try meat, you know. But I'm not trying it. You're not trying not doing it right now? No? Why not? Because you're in the middle of your I'm I'm meeting healthy I mean clean brod. It's the new brody. Um, that's the original Brody. I I lost. I was wayward where myself I've been found?

Um So, somebody who is this that sent this to us? This is hysteric? Uh, Jason Romano, thank you so much for pointing this. His name sounds like a cheese. That's how hungry. Really? Yeah, I guess this was a some kind of a graphic that they made for World Diabetes Day. Oh this is this is joined Macy's believers and celebrates the department the Heroes. They're basically celebrating World Diabetes Day by handing out free ConA ice. Do you know what

that is. It's sugar, sugar water. They're handing out sugar to people on Diabetes Day. Now, ConA is the company. Unlike in Philadelphia where they call it water ice. ConA is not a type of ice. It's the company. Why would you do that? What are you fucking doing? It's freaking It's National Diabetes World Diabetes Day and you're handing out free fucking sugar ices. Come on down to National Lung Cancer Awareness March. We'll be handing out Marlborough's cigarettes.

Un people, what I don't understand it? Okay. Also, by the way, there's not sugar free isis because all it is the only thing that makes that have any flavors, the sugar. Lisa Westcott, Texas a picture and said, I'll just leave this right here. And it literally is a picture of a door and one of the signs on it is a t M machine available inside in a professionally written sticker. Nobody spot checks this stuff. Why does

that happen? I have no idea? And uh And there was one other one that was hilarious, another visual um maybe it was to my Scary Jones account. I'm looking for Why are you looking for that? Let me tell you about Collinsville Transport. Now there's no name there, so

I have to just give props to Collinsville Transport. On Instagram, he put a picture up from his dashboard and in front of him is a drive through of the the rest of the Taco Bell he was at, ye and he wrote on the picture, I am currently sitting at Taco Bell after they told me to pull around on the front for my mobile order. You can't do that while I wait, I am writing them a long email, and I asked them for free dessert. So they made him drive around and get back on the end of

the line. Ah. So or either that or he had to pull around and they're gonna bring it out to him. But either way, it's that scam. So he's asking for free dessert, so let's hope he gets it. And I have a terrible grammar. Police police, police, police, Yeah, thank you, DJ MILLI DJ on the square, Milly on the square. And why uh this isn't a golf course. They put up a permanent sign that said, please be aware of ground staff on course, yell out for to get their attention,

and four it's spelled fo you are. And then somebody crushed it out and in Jaketey Sharpie wrote, f O R E that's pretty lame. That's shitty, dude. You're you're making a professional sign that you're paying money for. Why would you not spot check everything? I mean, it doesn't take much to prenter. No, why didn't They could have stopped him and said, hey, guys, I know I'm about to go to press with this. It's f r E like before, like ahead, you're people ahead coming? Did the

people do not know that? I don't know, I don't know. Uh. Joel, the real Joel K sent me a sign on an a t M that says tap card lightly as installing in credit card accept or, thank you e x C e P t R the credit card acceptor and um Max Stavager Stava guard. It seems to think that the set of the Many Saints of Newark is uh, which is the film that's out now, the Sopranos prequel. He seems to think that they are that it's cursed because

this is on the set. There there's been two murders, gang related murders, and he's showing a picture of a crime scene and video that he tweeted at me uh, and it's hashtag Soprano's curse. I don't know if he's making this up worth this is the thing, but apparently there's been going it's been happening right there in Belmont, which I believe is the Bronx. So the set of you know, the Many Saints of New Worker. I've seen nothing else. I wrote him back and I said, is

there a curse? I don't think one accident is a curse. He said, there's two murders there. Yeah, but I I got the impression with two murders like at the same time. And uh. Shout out to whoever it was who left me this gym. This is a TikTok which I've posted at Skeery Jones. If you don't follow me, please do on Instagram at s k e er Y Jones and Brodie. It's something that we've talked about on this podcast several times. I want you to go watch it if you can.

It's someone put a TikTok up of real life versus infomercials, and there are on your page. It basically it starts with a guy, um, you know, he opens up a cabinet and and he grabs it in real life. He grabs out whatever he needs his tupper were and he walks so closes the cabinet, walks away, and it cuts to infomercial. He opens up the cabinet, fucking seventeen thousand things fly out with the tupperware. Has this ever happened to you? That goes to black and white and falls

on the floor. The other part, the other infomercial is is the suran rap. He he nicely puts suran rap over a bowl, and then in real life and then the next in the infomercial one he's having a fight with the suran wrap. It gets caught around his head again, falls on the floor. There's one way he's messing with soap. He ends up in the tub with the entire shower curtain on his fucking head. It just hysterical. It's it's people were in his step. Oh my god. Still getting

a lot of views. It's happened over twenty views. That's on my Instagram. Check that out. Uh. And we've talked about it before and how they only do on it on infomercials is exaggerate everyday life like it doesn't happen that way in real life, right, exaggerate and make a problem to create a still Lucien, and when I cook a chicken, there's not a woman there going. Oh my god, so easy. Right. By the way, did you watch the

William Shatner Blue Origin launched today. I heard he went up and he was up and down in ninety seconds, right, it seemed like a little longer than that. Okay, uh, well it was successful because I didn't get any notifications on my phone that anything bad happened. No, he landed fine, he landed fine. It was just they had two women. Remember when um, they had the sexy announcer when Elon Musk went up in like that plane looking rocket. Yes,

oh right, it was looked like a penis. No, no, no, the plane I just said, it was a plane looking rocket. It look like it's it's split off into a plane. It looked like like you could fly like right, yes, yes, yes, yes, no the Amazon one is the penis. The Amazon was right. So they had two women doing one woman doing the play by play and then another woman who was sort of like the infomercial girl with her. They're gonna be going up just now. Watch the release of the of

the platform. Yes, oh it's perfect, and we hear it at Blue Origin are proud to welcome aboard William Shatner and three customers or whatever it was. And it was it was like she was giving the speech on takeoff and then every they did look how oh, look how flawlessly they disengaged a work of art, and the other girls like amazing. Was she calling like a gymnastics Olympics? Is that what this was? Like a competition infomercial? Look how easily the rocket goes? Okay? Felt like oh like butter,

absolutely like butter. You know, has this ever happened? More? If you take a rocket ride, you get two additional rocket rides. Yeah, if you if you listen to the original audio, that's what they sounded like. Has this ever happened to you? You're taking your muffins out of the oven and all of a sudden you perched your hand the floor. Oh my godcast, are you better take a deep breath and drink it less of water before this? Well that's what I've been losing weight to get in

shape for this range. What's been going on since July? So in a on a beautiful sunny day in July, my family decided they wanted me to order from t G. I Friday's. Everyone looks forward to Friday's right, So I using the app, we placed an order at four pm. The app said, you're food will be ready by My kids are starving, so I said, oh that's quick, let's do that. I'll go pick it up. At five seventeen.

I clicked the I'm here button on the app when I pulled into my pick up area spot, and on the app it asked me for a parking space number. You'd assume there'd be a sign in front of each spot or a painting on the ground with the number that tells you that no, no such number. Okay, so it has a phone number to call. So I called the phone number on the sign as I as I've done previously to pick up my food, and the person answers the phone. It's a guy, and he says, how

your food will be right out? What parking space number you in? And I said, I don't know how to answer that question, because you're parking spaces don't have numbers. He says, oh, really, for real? I said, yeah, you have that a numbers. He's I'll be right out. Twenty three minutes later. Twenty three minutes later, I called, and and I keep in mind, there's a girl. There's a girl running food. She running food other people. I called

and I said, hey, um, where's my order? I was told it would be right out twenty three minutes ago. How much was this? By the way, we do weeper price on this. How much food? Uh? Maybe fifty bucks? Okay? So the guy who answers the phone says, oh, it's sitting right here that they've got to bring it out. That's it's called by now. So what were he else? So? Okay? Uh,

so let me tell you what I ordered. I ordered two whiskey glazed sliders without onions, because they come with sauce, cheese, onions, and I order them without the onions breakfast, Okay, they come with fries or mashed potatoes. I ordered mashed potatoes. My one of my kids ordered um, the Jack Daniels chicken strips and a side of fries. And my other

daughter ordered mozzarella sticks at a side of fries. You follow me when my food comes out, because it was so long, I opened it up to see if it's fresh, and I noticed my burgers have pickles on them, fucking pickles on them, which is not on the venue. And so the girl who gave me my food comes back out to bring someone else their food, and I call her over and I said, excuse me. The menu doesn't say anthing about pickles. The app doesn't give you an

option to order without pickles. It's not listen as a menu. And I said to the girl, do me a favorite. Please don't just take the pickles off the hamburgers. Can you please remake them? The pickle juice ruins the hamburgers. I know this if you previous Brooken Boys episode. This fucking happened to me. And I called him out on the carpet. This happened. I know what's gonna happen here, motherfucker's. So I waited to know the fourteen minutes of my

food to be remade. Now this is Friday's. They're they're banging out burgers every second, But I waited four or fourteen minutes. At this point, my my family is now waiting a half hour longer than they should have. While waiting, I noticed the two sides of fries. The two sides of fries, and the mashed potatoes I ordered are not in the bag. Okay, so I've got the chicken strips, the burgers I gave back, and the mozzarella sticks, which are now hard as a rock. My order comes out

twenty five minut it's later, okay, how long you're there? Total? Now twenty Well I got told on like thirty nine minutes. So um, so I'm waiting, right, and I noticed this. The orders are the side orders are not there, right, so I go inside because I figured I am not gonna call. Let me go inside and tell them that my side of fries and potatoes aren't there. And the mozzarella sticks are shot. At this point, they're shot. You can't reheat them there properly. So I go inside and

I called one of the girls over. There's like a bunch of girls running food and now there's an open kitchen, right, so you could it's so not the kitchens open, but where you stand it's there's no wall, so you can just look into the manager and the staff expediting and packing the food. They're no more than ten feet away from where I'm standing. The girl says. I say, hey, listen, I'm waiting for my burgers to be remade. But I

didn't get my mashed potatoes. Was Oh my fries, and she was, Oh, they're on the the to go shelf, this giant rack. So she hands them to me. So I'm i'm I'm I'm looking. I'm looking at so now that she hands me the food, and now she's not she's the girl who came out to the car. And the mashed potatoes are ice cold, and the French fries are cold. Everything fries, everything's cold. I'm there like forty five minutes at this point, so I want to point out, please,

I don't want to hear it. This is back in July. Everyone in the kitchen is wearing their masks on their chins. That's gonna be part of the story in a minute, all right. I don't say anything. I don't care whatever. So I asked the girl, can I please speak to the manager? Okay, because my food is still not ready. It's forty five minutes and my side orders are cold. So the girl walks over to the manager, being polite.

The girl walks over to the manager and he looks at He looks in my general direction, like to the open area where there's the customers waiting for their food, and he gives her the wave like go away. I'm busy because he's helping pack the food. Okay, I'm standing there. Sixteen more minutes, we're at the hour mark pretty much. The sliders come out. They don't have cheese on them, okay, So I say to the girl, hey, listen, um, these don't have cheese on them. I just wanted them without

onions and pickle. So she walks back over to the manager, who's ten ft away. I see him, and the manager says, I think there's cheese on them. And the girl who is standing there, playing with her long hair, who's been running food out to cars, he says, I think there's cheese on there. She takes her hair hands, opens the clamshell and lifts the top of my burgers to look for the cheese, and she says there's no cheese here. So the guy, the manager. The manager says, well, we'll

fix it. She turns around and says, I'll put cheese on them. Then I said, no, no, thank you. You just man handled my food and your hands aren't clean. So the manager takes them, throws them in the garbage right and says we'll make him again. Fifteen minutes later, I'm at the hour and twenty minute more right, they didn't move them to the front of the order. They come out. Now they're like hockey pucks. They have no sauce on them, no spicy mayo, which is supposed the

spicy mayo on there. Now they're just cheese. They're just burgers and cheese. And the whole point are in them is for the spicy mayo and the whiskey sauce. So I say to the girl, look, I gotta get out of here. Can you at least give me the spicy mayo and the sauce on the side. Now, you know, when you pour the sauce on, it didn't cook on the burger, it didn't seep in. It's gonna be shipped. Six minutes later, after she told the manager I needed

the sauces, he asked the kitchen for the sauces. He gives them to a different girl and says, give these to the guy. She doesn't know who I am. So she's walking around the kitchen saying, do you know who I'm supposed to give these two? And I'm going those are my sauces, but she can't hear me because everyone in the kitchen is yelling. So then she comes out and walks like to this first guy who's on the left here, he is sauces, sir, and he takes the

bag and go, well, all those are my sauces. So the guy looks at me like he thinks, like, no, he's a my sauces. I'm waiting. I go. I said, trees, please trust me, sir, please, those are my sauces. And the girl said the guys store of these his sauces shoes I don't know because she doesn't know. And I said, sir, please take my word for those of my sauces. So

he begrudgingly gives me gives me the sauces. Right. So, at no point did the manager in the kitchen, who has looked over my general direction come out and talk to me to apologize. Right, So it's an hour and like thirty six minutes from the time I ordered the food, and over thirty five minutes from the time I was that would uh that I should that I came in for my fries. So a second manager I see is like punching in or like punching the staff in, and

he's tightening his tie. I excuse me, are you a manager? He says, yeah, I'm just signing on. I just got here. I said, well, I'm having a big problem, right, he's so, how can I help you? So? I said, so, By the way, my bill was eighty five dollars. You explained the whole thing. Now, brought this dude up to speed, the whole thing. Now, here's where the ironic part kicks in. Because eighty five dollars and that kind of a nightmare. He says to me. I'm so sorry, sir. Let me

make this right. Good guy right wants to make it right. Here's where here's where my life shoots me in the foot and I and I did not take my own advice. Scary because all the food's ruined, and it's cold, and the motrel sticks are bad. Whatever. Okay, what do you think would have been an appropriate thing for me to offer him? To offer me for my eighty five dollar meal, hour and a half way all this straw for me for me your eighty five dollars back and a one

gift card see us next time. I like the way I like I like I like the way you're talking like that. If I was a manager, I would do that like that. That's free dessert. Here's where the irony comes in ready, get the music ready. He says, sir, I want to make this right. And he hands me a card and I look at the card and says, good for one free dessert? Are you kidding me? Not free? You must listen to the podcast you gave me was free dessert next time I come. That is not free dessert.

That's literally free dessert. Isn't that what you always wanted in your life? But that's not it? So I saw cut the music, cut the music. So I said, I said, sir, sir, you're asking me to come back. He goes, well, I'll give you the free dessert. Now' gonna take it home. And I can't wait any longer. You don't even what you want dessert. I don't want to serve. My kids are hungry. I said, you're not gonna take any off my bill. Well, I gave it a free dessert. You

can have any dessert you want. So I said, I'll take the card, but don't you want me to come back? I said? This is what He goes, that's the best I can do. The best you can do. You can't take off a little bit of the snats I And so I give you the card free dessert, so I said, I said, sir, I'm gonna I'm gona have to have to contact customer service in corporate office. I'm sorry, I said, You're very kind. I appreciate that, but a Cooper for free dessert. Yes, the irony of it is Brody got

free dessert. But no, what you said, that's not enough, right, that's not even like a smidge over even that's not even even a free dessert. Is one like you put my you put ice in my soda. Right, I waited ten minutes extra for my food. This is an hour and forty minutes. Okay. So I email customer service and they're right back. We're terribly sorry, we're on it. We'll get back to you within three business days. Two days later, I get an email that says we're happy. We hope

you are satisfied. We appreciate your time, and thank you again. Your case is closed. You're satisfied, So I said, so I want to I want to get hold on, hold on, so I want to get there. I'm gonna pull up the email here while I'm talking. So, so I they just they just arbitrarily closed your case without right. So I want to pull up the email. I'm gonna pup the exact verbiage of it. I thought I screenshot at up, but I didn't. Right, Okay, here we go. Take a close.

I'm gonna read the ticket. Close. Your request has been archived. If you still need assistance, please reply to this email to automatically reopen the ticket and we will provide further assistance. We hope you are satisfied. Not satisfied, not satisfied at all. So I right back and I say, hey, um listen, Uh, you guys didn't do anything. You never got back to me. You closed my case, so they wrote back. We sincerely apologize for the delay. Our team has already reopened the

case and routed it to upper management. This is July the concerned The concerned team must have been in contact with you regarding the same. There's a concerned team. Thank you for your patience with us. Please ignore the automated responses of tickets being closed, as a different team member will take care of this further. We truly appreciate your loyalty and look forward to serving you. Okay, somebody tells me the journey has only begun. It's October fifteen. In August,

they closed the ticket. They sincerely apologized when I yelled at them in you know, verbally yelled at it, you know, and so then they so August twelve, we sincerely apologize. We have reopened your ticket. Although we strive for customer satisfaction, it's clear we've fallen short in this instance, and that's unacceptable. To make sure your issue is resolved and has heard. We are looking into this with our internal team and we'll get back to you shortly. We truly appreciate your patients.

That was August twelve. On August fourteen, they closed my account again. What the fuck? Right? The concerned team? Not so concerned? So I wrote back, I don't know if this is automated or not, but it's a September and nobody has helped me. September six. We sincerely apologize. We're looking into this with our internal team. We understand your frustrated. What the fuck? Okay? That's September six, September. Your request is an archived. We have closed your ticket. What is

happening here with you? At this point? I feel like the guy that was on duty that gave you the free dessert was the one in charge of this account. Okay, okay. So so on September twenty s I call, I called the store, and I asked us to who is the regional I need to speak to a regional manager. I called corporate. I called corporate. I said, look, I'm having a problem with the store. I gave them the store number because it was on the receipt. I said, look,

I just want someone to call me. I'm waiting since July. It's the end of September. Can somebody just call me? I tell him, I tell him the storem in right, for the sake of his conversation, let's say that the store location I went to is um north Town. Okay, north Town. That's the that's the town that it's in his North Town. The town has a direction in front of it. For the sake of this conversation, they said, we'll have the regional person get in touch with you.

I'm like, okay, sure, right, okay. The next day I get a call from John. John says to me, hey, I'm calling. I'm terribly sorry. I understand you've been through a situation UM, and I understand you had a problem at UM North other town. No North other Town. I said, no, no, no, not North Other Town north Town. Oh, I'm not the regional manager for north Town. I'm the regional manager for north other town. They told me you had the prominent

north Town. No, no, no, no, no, Please help me, Please help me, he says, Oh, man, what tell me what happened? But maybe I can help you. Even though it's not my store. I don't have any jury fiction over that store. I said, I've been having this problem since July. He says, tell me the story. So I tell him a story, and every few minutes he goes, are you shipping me? I said nope. He goes, go on,

what else happened? And I'm telling him the story. He goes with her hands, yep, yep, with her hands, And I go with the story and he's like, he offered you a coupon for free. What you're kidding me? I go nope. So he says, I I'm dumbfounded. I've never heard a story like that. He said, Well, that's the story. He says, Well, listen, it's not it's not my it's not my area. As I I can't help you with the store level. But here's what I'm gonna do. You've

been through a lot. I'm personally notifying my team. I'm gonna send you a hundred all the gift card and we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna cancel your credit card for that day and make it right. Guess why to come back. It's almost like I predicted that was gonna happen. So I got my real free dessart, he says. He says, you know what, here's my name, here's my cell phone number. You have any problem ever again free game, you call me directly and I will take care of it. And

so he called me a week later. He said, you should have it in your email by tomorrow. And by the way, that manager I called, the manager of the problem with I called, and that manager is with the general manager of the store. He's no longer with the company because not because of me, he was Apparently there were a lot of issues with him. He's no longer with the company, he said. So I'd like you to go back to your North Town store and feel comfortable

knowing that there's a new regime. They transferred in Barbara something, whatever name was, who's from one of our top stores, to fix the problem there, fix the store. So I got my free, real free dessert. You got your fucking happy ending, and I got the coupon for the free dessert, and I got a new management staff there, so I'm happy everybody. Three months and they got the town wrong. Can you believe that the game in the wrong region goes to show that persistence is everything You've got to

You've got to follow up on these problems. You've got to listen. Three months of emails and closing my case and opening it and closing it. We're closing it, but if you want to reopen, let us know. I just want someone to call me. I just please want someone to call me Wolf. So don't even do it because you're gonna miss the mark. Brooklyn, Shut up boys, brook Bland Boys.